MISCHKE: Feeling Moody (ep. 115)

Summary

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Garage Logic – MISCHKE: Feeling Moody (Ep. 115)

Release Date: May 29, 2026
Host: Tom Mischke
Podcast Network: Gamut Podcast Network

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Episode Overview

In this episode of Garage Logic, Tom Mischke (Mischke) reflects on the meaning of being “moody,” examines how cultural moods shift and manifest, and dives deep into quirky moments of American history—most memorably, the 1970s streaking fad. Mischke blends nostalgia with sharp wit, weaving in pop music tangents, interviews with listeners about supernatural experiences, and a wry look at people who come to believe they are Jesus Christ. The episode is a study in storytelling and observational humor, with Mischke’s curiosity steering both comedic and contemplative moments.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Opening: Moods and What It Means to Be “Moody”

• Mischke kicks off by riffing on the nebulous nature of “moodiness”:
  • “Do you have a mood? What is that mood? Are you feeling a little moody? What's got you moody? Actually, what the heck does moody mean? Really? Aren't we all moody all the time?” (02:02)
  • He jokes about the frequency of mood shifts and the universality of being “in a mood”.
• This segment establishes the episode’s loose, meandering structure—using mood as a motif for stories and social commentary.

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2. Observational Anecdote: The Blonde at KS95

• Mischke shares a recurring observation: every time he walks past the KS95 radio studio, he sees a blonde woman at the mic.
  • “Now, I come in at all hours of the day and night... I have never seen anything but blonde hair and female hair... What is the rule over there? You have to be female and blonde?” (03:17)
  • He jokes about how his own medium—talk radio—differs from FM music radio:
    • “We didn't play the hits. Now, we took hits from our listeners, lots of them... You haven't lived until you've worked the trenches of talk radio.” (04:20)
• This blends casual workplace humor with gentle ribbing of broadcast conventions.

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3. Chart Oddities and the Absurdity of Pop Success

• Mischke explores surprising facts about pop hits that failed to crack the Top 40.
  • The Rolling Stones’ “You Can’t Always Get What You Want”, Dolly Parton’s “Jolene”, and Elton John’s “Tiny Dancer” never made the Top 40, while “The Streak” by Ray Stevens hit #1.
  • “Number one. The number one song, 1974. The Streak. ...It was about running around naked.” (07:16)
  • Recites and satirizes the song’s famous “don’t look, Ethel!” hook.
• Mischke reflects on how cultural tastes and moods drive chart success, often favoring the zany or gimmicky:
  • “Maybe we'll chalk it up to May of '74 just being a really weird month... Tubular Bells... Hooked on a Feeling... with that disturbing beginning. Ga cha google ga cha google gacha ga.” (09:36)
• He humorously imagines attention-grabbing song gimmicks inserted into unlikely places:
  • “How about just before the Star Spangled Banner? Ooga chucka, ooga ooga ooga chucka...” (10:30)

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4. Streaking as a Cultural Phenomenon of the 1970s

• Deep dive into the streaking fad:
  • Mischke theorizes streaking’s popularity as a response to the gloom of the Vietnam War and Watergate.
    • “There was a feeling that we needed to do something in a free spirited, crazy, wild, wondrous way to counter the horror show of the Vietnam War years...” (13:39)
  • He drills into oddities of the fad:
    • “Why the running? ...You want to show people your nude body... But did anyone bother to think of the handicapped, the elderly?... Why not dancing? ... Just take your clothes off and pretend you're a statue.” (16:21)
  • Mischke jokes about running alongside a streaker, exchanging banter:
    • “I'd say, wait a minute. I'm the creep? You're the one running naked.” (18:09)
• Notes that streaking never truly died, citing recent news stories involving streakers across the nation (Florida, Texas, Montana, etc.).
• Notable moment: Miscellaneous naked news montage, reinforcing the enduring silliness (22:30).

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5. Listener Interview: Supernatural Experiences and Mortality

• Mischke calls a listener, Bruce, during his gym session, to ask probing personal questions.
  • “What truth about yourself are you terrified to admit to? Even to yourself?” (30:21)
• Bruce relates a supernatural encounter with a deceased childhood friend:
  • “One night he was there, sitting on the end of my bed, just basically telling me, it's okay, it'll be okay. ...It wasn't a dream. ...Just so reassuring… total euphoric feeling come over me.” (31:16)
  • Mischke finds the sitting-at-the-end-of-the-bed motif striking:
    • “I hear often about these things occurring closer to the time of death. ...I hear so often about the sitting on the side of the bed image.” (32:18)
• Bruce also shares a harrowing story about waking to a burglar in his room:
  • “I woke up, I look at the clock, it's three o'clock on the dot. There's somebody over by my dresser with a flashlight. ...‘Don't move or I'll shoot you.’ ...My very next thought was, this... is going to take my World Series tickets.” (39:13)
• The conversation turns hilarious as Mischke proposes alternative lines to scare off a burglar (“I got a .38 pointed at you... you can run or you can bleed.”, 43:03), and reflects on missed opportunities to watch the 1987 World Series with his dad instead of at the stadium.

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6. Nostalgia and Reflections on Family

• Mischke laments not spending the 1987 Twins’ World Series victory with his father:
  • “It's the only thing I ever think of that I'd do differently... I'd skip being at the Metrodome... and I'd have pulled up a little chair next to the old man...” (41:02)
• This reflection draws out the episode’s underlying meditations on time, regret, and family connections.

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7. Satirical Meditations on “People Who Think They’re Jesus”

• Mischke explores the odd recurring news phenomenon of people believing themselves to be Jesus, riffing on recent and historic stories:
  • “There’s a cumulative effect with a lot of news stories with me... It’s only funny to me because I just think of what that would be like to be somebody who thinks they're Jesus Christ. I think that would just come with a whole lot of dominoes falling over the years.” (47:02)
• Includes:
  • News stories about individuals claiming divinity, from a man on Pennsylvania Avenue to a Russian cult leader and a guy calmly breaking into a Pizza Hut:
    • 911 Operator: ‘And what was your name again?’ | Caller: ‘My name is Jesus.’ (51:28)
    • ‘Why'd you do that?’ — ‘Because I'm Jesus. I can do whatever I want. We're tired of. Judas is on this earth. We're gonna clean this earth up.’ (51:44)
• Mischke speculates on the odd logistics of coming to believe you’re Jesus as an adult:
  • “There must be a moment where you say, and again, I could be wrong, But I assume there's a moment where you say, oh, no, no, you are kidding me. I'm Jesus. This changes everything.” (52:28)
• Delivers a vivid, satirical “what if” about breaking the news to one’s spouse:
  • “Carol, I am. I'm Jesus, the savior of the world, and you are smack dab in the middle of the Second Coming. Kiddo, you are married to the man. And I mean the man.” (53:36)
• Shares a psychological anecdote about the “Three Christs of Ypsilanti” experiment, and imagines running tests to see who the “real” Jesus is among men who claim it (55:31).

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Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• On streaking:

  • “If you can get 1974 in your head, what's going on with Watergate at that time? Isn't something happening there? Yeah, Nixon resigns that summer, so that's all going on. Watergate's pretty intense and I think people just needed a release.” (14:52)

• On odd chart toppers:

  • “So in one month we're getting chuka ooga ooga. And a month later, for number one, we're getting naked as a jaybird. Don't look, Ethel.” (11:59)

• On supernatural comfort:

  • (Listener Bruce) “He was there and he just... It was just so reassuring. ...From there on, it was like, okay, everything's gonna be fine.” (31:54)

• On breaking news to family:

  • “Carol, I am... I'm Jesus, the savior of the world, and you are smack dab in the middle of the Second Coming. Kiddo, you are married to the man.” (53:36)

• On comparing live and dead intruders:

  • (Bruce) “I don't think it's the dead people you need to worry about. It's the live ones.” (38:49)

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Important Timestamps

| Time | Segment/Highlight | |-----------|:----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------| | 02:02 | Mischke’s mood riff begins; contemplating universal moodiness | | 03:17 | KS95 “blonde at the mic” anecdote; radio host humor | | 07:16 | Music charts: why “The Streak” hit #1 and better songs did not | | 13:39 | Streaking origins: cultural backlash after Vietnam/Watergate | | 16:21 | Comedic musings: Why always “running” when streaking? | | 22:30 | Contemporary news montage of streakers in America | | 30:21 | “What truth are you terrified to admit?”—start of Bruce interview | | 31:16 | Listener describes a supernatural visitation comforted by deceased friend | | 39:13 | Account of being robbed at home, near-loss of World Series tickets | | 41:02 | Regret over not watching the '87 World Series with his dad | | 47:02 | Mischke on the phenomenon of people claiming to be Jesus | | 51:28 | Real 911 call: self-proclaimed “Jesus” calmly justifies break-in at Pizza Hut | | 53:36 | Satirical “second coming” phone call to wife Carol | | 55:31 | Psychologist’s “Three Christs of Ypsilanti” experiment and imagined tests for Jesushood |

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Summary and Takeaways

• Mischke offers a winding, digressive, but thematically anchored episode, using the idea of “mood” to travel through American pop history, personal anecdotes, and societal quirks.
• Listeners are treated to trivia, philosophical musing, absurdist hypotheticals, and poignant memories, all delivered with sincerity and a sharp sense of the absurd.
• The show’s ability to balance humor and depth—leaping from song lyrics and odd historical fads to honest conversations about death, regret, and the supernatural—is what makes Garage Logic, and Mischke, beloved in Minnesota and beyond.

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This summary covers the substance and style of the episode, with special attention to the episode’s blend of humor, cultural storytelling, and poignant reflection.

Transcript

[A]

It's a world of artificial intelligence, of limited character tweets, of mini clips on TikTok. My name's Mishke, and the Mishke Podcast offers something wholly different. The lost art of simple human storytelling. Whether humorous tales, absurd narratives, or real drama, telling stories is my stock in trade. So escape to the very human Mishke Podcast. Wherever you get your podcasts, garagelogic isn't just another podcast. It's a trusted voice with a loyal audience. Every day, listeners tune in and pay attention to the businesses we feature. When you advertise with garagelogic, you're putting your brand in front of people who listen and act. We're number one in Anguilla, and we'll make your business number one with G. Ellers. Here's what one of our clients had to say. Hey, it's Pete Arnold from Hire it Pro. And I've used garagelogic to promote my business for years. And I have seen great results in new clients for my services from the GL audience. I recommend it to any business looking for new customers. GL ers are pretty awesome. You just gotta ask for an introduction. You just heard how garagelogic delivers results for our advertising partners. Now it's your turn. Reach our engaged audience of GL ers and grow your business by contacting account executive mark [e-mail] that's mark.ellisbi.com Put your message where it belongs, right in the ears of listeners who trust garagelogic. Premier hosts on VRBO deliver quality vacation rental stays with fast responses and clear instructions so you don't have to worry about surprises. I asked our host a question about the house last night and he got back to me super quick. See, that's a premier host move right there. I wish I had a premier group chat. I asked them where we should have dinner last night and they left me on red. I know you saw it. It says it. Classic group chat move. Don't walk into a surprise. Book a top rated verbo. Stay with a premier host if you know you Verbo. Showtime, folks. My name's mishki. Cutie, cutie. Hugh. Cutie. Howdy. Hi. What are you in the mood for this time around? Do you have a mood? What is that mood? Are you feeling a little moody? What's got you moody? Actually, what the heck does moody mean? Really? Aren't we all moody all the time? I'm in a mood, you're in a mood. Sometimes you're in a different mood. We're all moody. Moody, Moody. Whoa. Moody, Moody, Moody, Moody. Moody. Whoa. Moody.

[B]

Moody.

[A]

What? Moody. Hi there. Every time I walk into the building here at Hubbard Broadcasting, every time I come down the Hubbard radio hallway, I look to my left And I see KS95. I see directly into the studio of KS95, our FM music station. I look through the glass, I look into a little waiting area, and then beyond that is another pane of glass. And in that room is a woman at a microphone with blonde hair. Now, I don't have the greatest eyes in the world. I can't make out facial features. I know I see blond hair and I know I'm looking at a woman. Now, I come in at all hours of the day and night. I come in at wild hours. No matter when I come in, no matter when, no matter the day. I look through that glass and I see blonde hair at a microphone. I have never seen anything but blonde hair and female hair. Hair on a female head at that microphone. Now, I know they have a lot of different people working there. There's no way I'm looking at the same person every time. There's no way one person works there on the radio. They must have a ton of different people working there. What is the rule over there? You have to be female and blonde. I smile every time. I mean, I've been coming into the building here at Hubbard for well over a year now, and I've seen nothing but a blonde haired woman. I ain't seen nothing but a blond haired woman sitting at a microphone. One of these days I'm gonna poke my head in the door there. Although they generally don't like that when they're on the air. They don't like it when you stick your head in the studio and say, hey there, I'm Tom. Oh, I'm sorry, are you talking to the people? You must be talking about the big hit you just played or the one you're about to play. What's that like? I never did that. See, I was in talk radio. We didn't play the hits. Now, we took hits from our listeners, lots of them. Angry listeners. Some waited outside the door at night when we got off work. There they were by our car. Oh, we took hits. Now, you haven't lived until you've worked the trenches of talk radio. Lady, what's your name? Let me just call you Blondie. And she might look at me and say, well, you're in a mood. What does that mean? You're in a mood? Yes, we all are on this earth. Yeah, but you're really in a mood. You say that Again. And I'm gonna steal all your records and force you to be a talk radio host for the rest of the night. Okay? You don't want me taking all those records now, do you, Tom? They haven't played records in years. Shut up. Don't tell me how it works. Speaking of music, I was looking at top 40 hits the other day. Why was I looking? Oh, I was surprised at how low a certain song was on the charts. I thought it would be much higher. Let me see if I can find it here. Hang on a second. I'll find it. You stay right there. Yeah, here's what I was looking at. Songs that you would have thought would have been in the top 10 on the charts after they came out that didn't make the top 40. That's what I was looking at. The Rolling Stones. You can't always get what you want didn't crack the top 40. I thought that was one of their best hits. Rolling Stones. You can't always get what you want never made it into the top 40. Arguably Dolly Parton's greatest song ever. Jolene never cracked the top 40. Never cracked the top 50. All My Lovin by the Beatles, 1964, never cracked the top 40. What? One of Elton John's best songs, Certainly. Beloved Tiny Dancer never cracked the top 40. Rolling Stone magazine called Bruce Springsteen's Badlands the second greatest song Springsteen ever wrote. It never cracked the top 40. But you know what did crack the top 40? 52 years ago this month, it cracked the top 40. Oh, it cracked the top 30. Cracked the top 20. Cracked the top 10. It went to number one. The number one most beloved tune in all of America. Nothing was a hotter seller. Everybody loved it. The number one song, 1974. The Streak. No, it wasn't about Lou Gehrig's streak. It wasn't about Joe DiMaggio's streak. It wasn't. It was about running around naked. Do you remember how the song started out? A newscaster was saying, hello, everyone. This is your Action News reporter with all the news. That is news across the nation. On the scene at the supermarket, there seems to have been some disturbance here. Pardon me, sir. Did you see what happened? And the guy says, yeah, I did. I standing over there by the demeters. And here he come running through the pole beans, through the fruits and vegetables, naked as a jaybird. And I yelled over there. I said, ethel, don't look. But it was too late. She'd already been incensed. Yeah, that went to number one. Mm. Here he comes. Look at that. Look at that. There he goes. Look at that. Look at that. And he ain't wearing no clothes. What? I mean, okay. Some people were tapping their feet to it.

[B]

Sure.

[A]

One. Number one. Number one. Number one. Number one. Is this mic working? Number one. Maybe we'll chalk it up to May of 74 just being a really weird month because what else was in that top 10? TSOP? The Sound of Philadelphia by MFSB featuring the 3 degrees. I might have been in my tree house that month and missed it. I don't know what that song is. Tubular Bells by Mike Oldfield, also in the top 10. Maybe this was the month to slip in the streak. Marvin Hamlisch's theme for the Sting was in the top 10. Yeah, it was a weird time in music. I think I'll chalk it up to that. Otherwise, I don't know how one would explain the fact that in the top 12 you could find Hooked on a Feeling. Do you remember Hooked on a Feeling? One of the more disturbing beginnings to a song in the history of music. Ga cha google ga cha google gacha ga. Why did they do that? Why did they do that to that song? In all seriousness, why would you start a song that way? The lyrics then begin, I can't stop this feeling deep inside of me. Girl, you just don't realize what you do to me. Is that the feeling? The chaka ooga thing? What is that? Then a relatively decent voice comes in. I can't stop this feeling deep inside of me. You can't stop that. That's going all day. Chucka ooga ooga ooga. You have to find someone who can help you. You know what we're gonna do right now? We're gonna find out why the hell they added that Chuck a. Let's get it out in the open and put it to bed as a topic. Well, it says here the famous ooga chaka ooga ooga ooga was added to the song Hooked on a Feeling simply as a catchy, attention grabbing Gimmick. The original 1968 version by BJ Thomas did not have that. They must have freaked out BJ when they threw that in there. He said to himself, I don't recall having that in there. I'm gonna listen to my original. I don't remember that being there at all. Here's what's most disturbing. One month earlier, so not May, but April of 74, Hooked on a Feeling was number one. So in one month we're getting chucka ooga ooga. And a month later, for Number one, we're getting Nick it as a J. Bird. Don't look, Ethel. Look at that. Look at that. What a hideous time in American music. A catchy, attention grabbing gimmick. Well, let's put it into more things. If it grabs attention and it's catchy, how about just before the Star Spangled Banner? Ooga chucka, ooga ooga ooga chucka. Oh, who say, can you see all over the stands there'd be shirtless guys with paint on their faces getting all excited for the chukauga part. They wouldn't sing the rest of the national anthem, but you could get an incredible amount of audience participation at football games with these drunk, shirtless guys. Is it time for the anthem yet, fellas? Choco oo ga ooga ooga chaka. No, no. Choco oo go ooga. You write a song, you finish it. The guys are sitting around. It's all right. It's a decent song, but I think it needs a catchy, attention grabbing gimmick. Anybody got any ideas? Well, Tim over there is on mushrooms. Ask him. Tim, your thoughts? Tim's a little nuts, huh? Well, let's pause a minute and think about what Tim just said. Well, I don't know about that. I say we wait till he comes down from the mushrooms. Do you want to just take what he's thinking right now? That's some messed up stuff coming out of him there. Doesn't have anything to do with the song. Doesn't fit with the song. Well, we can make it fit. We'll make it fit. You guys really want to go with Tim, huh? Who is Tim anyway? Oh, he's the trombone player's nephew. He's babysitting him and he gave him mushrooms. Well, the kid wouldn't shut up. You think back to 74, those of you who can remember 74. And streaking was peaking. And streaking, really, when you think about it, was one of the strangest fads in the history of this nation. People just started running around without clothes on and had caught on all over the country for a while and then sort of faded away. Why were we doing that? Well, I don't mind saying I looked it up today. I didn't remember why we did that. I couldn't for the life of me come up with a reason. Turns out there was a feeling that we needed to do something in a free spirited, crazy, wild, wondrous way to counter the horror show of the Vietnam War years. We were coming to the end of the Vietnam War. It had been long it had been hard, it had been horrible. It had been God awful in so many ways. And people just wanted to leave that period. They wanted to leave the 60s, they wanted to leave assassinations, they wanted to leave civil rights protests. They wanted to go into the zany and the silly. That's how you end up with. And take your clothes off and run. Why? I don't know. The guy on mushrooms said we should do it. If you can get 1974 in your head, what's going on with Watergate at that time? Isn't something happening there? Yeah, Nixon resigns that summer, so that's all going on. Watergate's pretty intense and I think people just needed a release. I think almost any idea you had, you could have sold in the spring and summer of 1974. Anything. Let me just find out what other weird things happened. Says here leisure suits were big and mood rings carefree. Polyester was popular. And people revived goldfish swallowing, which had been a 1930s college fad. The highway speed limit was lowered to 55. That couldn't have made people too happy. Cleveland Indians had 10 cent beer night and there was a riot. They should have had mushroom night. Liposuction was invented. The Rubik's Cube was invented. And people getting liposuction would play with a Rubik's Cube while the fat got sucked out of them. And the sound of the liposuction machine. Here's the thing about streaking. Okay, you want to take your clothes off. Clearly the big thing is getting the clothes off. Okay, so the clothes are off. Why the running? If you took that out of it, maybe it would have been a fad everybody could participate in. But did anyone bother to think of the handicapped, the elderly? I'm quite serious when I say, why the running? Okay, you want to show people your nude body. Clearly you do, right? You want to show people your naked body. Okay. Why every single time was it running? And I mean every time? It was always running. Why not? I don't know, dancing? I'm serious. Why not dancing? Why not yoga? Why not pretend you're a statue? Just take your clothes off and pretend you're a statue. Or just sing. Sing or pray. Take your clothes off, get on your knees, pray, play Hacky sack. Nope. It was always running. Where was everybody going? What was the rush? If there was ever a time to have slowed things down, it was the summer of 74. God, if you knew what was waiting in the future, hell yeah, you would have slowed it down. What's going to be happening in the 2000s. Are you kidding me? When someone was streaking, when they were running without clothes on, did anyone with clothes ever just run alongside them? I never saw that, but you certainly could have. It takes time to get out of your clothes and run. But if you're just going to run with clothes on, you could start running the second you saw someone running without clothes. So if someone ran by you without clothes, right away, you could just run alongside them with your clothes on and just, I don't know, talk to them. Where are you going? What's the rush? Maybe the cameraman from Mutual of Omaha's Wild Kingdom could have ran alongside. While Jim chases the naked people with his camera equipment, Marlin waits near a shady bend in the road up ahead, hoping to get an interview. Hi, I'm Marlon Perkins. Where you heading? Marlon Perkins from Wild Kingdom. Bet you ain't seen anything this wild, have you, Marlin? I guess I would want to run alongside. Look at what happened in the movie Rocky the First. Rocky. Rocky goes out running, and half of Philadelphia runs with them. They see him running, everyone runs with them. The kids all start running. And they weren't planning to. They just saw him running by and they joined him. Why didn't that happen with streakers? I can imagine the streaker turning to me and saying, get out of here, you creep. I'd say, wait a minute. I'm the creep? You're the one running naked. Yeah, but why you running alongside me? Well, isn't the better question, why are you running naked? Cause I'm streaking. Yeah, but why? Cause it's the seventies. That's your reason? Yeah, that's my reason. So why are you a man, running alongside me, a woman, while I'm running naked? Well, I think you answered that question. I'm a man. How long is today's run, anyway? We doing a full 10k or what? Because I'm up for a full marathon. What's your name, sweetheart? I did actually believe that streaking was a fad that came and went. I did think of it as something that was a 70s thing and then disappeared. But I learned in my research today, it never went away. It never went away. You can still find stories of streaking. Being naked and just getting out there in public is still very, very popular. Facing charges for going streaking during yesterday's Bills game, deputies arrested Tristan Lambright after they say he jumped from the stands late in the game and ran across the field naked. We have disturbing new information about that guy caught on security camera roaming a West Mobile neighborhood naked. He's still out there. I woke up this morning to this news that we have this streaker in our neighborhood. Earlier this week, police in Panama City responded to a naked man in a Hobby lobby. Several customers were inside the store when an unidentified naked man runs inside. The man took off his clothes outside of a nearby dental office and ran into the Hobby lobby. Choppers and employees said they didn't know what to do. Naked neighborhood nuisance. A serial streaker keeping families on edge. Residents have seen him walking here in the neighborhood naked on several occasions, sometimes in broad daylight, right in the middle of the afternoon. A naked man arrested for the 18th time after taking Cape Coral police on a chase. Not surprising. Welcome to Florida. A shocking scene on board a Southwest flight when a woman stripped naked just as that plane was about to take off, parading through the aisle and screaming at the top of her lungs. This is Houston, Texas this morning. A naked woman on top of a tractor trailer. A 38 year old naked driver is behind bars tonight after she led a Montana Highway Patrol officer on a pursuit just east of Billings yesterday. Here's a look at the women spotted naked at a rest stop in Pasco County. This all started when A custodian called 911 saying the three women were naked

[B]

outside, all three of them standing in a nude.

[A]

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[B]

Hello.

[A]

Well, hello there, Bruce.

[B]

Hey, Tommy. How are you doing?

[A]

Real well. And you?

[B]

I'm good. I'm at the health club working out. I just got off the treadmill listening to your January 1st podcast.

[A]

You're going all the way back to January 1st.

[B]

I got a late start and I'm trying to work my way through.

[A]

Well, you got a lot more time on that treadmill, mister. Do you ever say to yourself when you're on the treadmill, surely this energy I'm expending could be used to better mankind in some way?

[B]

Nope, never had that.

[A]

Thought we could attach certain things to you the same way that Water propelling a mill would help mankind. Or the way you wind something up, maybe with a rubber band and let it go and it can provide energy to propel something. All that energy you're expending could be used to generate something that could help us on this earth.

[B]

That's a good point. That is a very good point. We should work on that.

[A]

Yeah. So you're at the health club right now and you're just, what, are you just standing off to the side next to the heavy set gal?

[B]

No, actually I'm just kind of ending up doing some stretching and checking out the one good looking personal trainer here, the one that handles personal training for all the old guys.

[A]

So all the old guys ogle her as she tells them how to prevent death?

[B]

Yeah, I could be. I haven't got to that point yet.

[A]

Dying?

[B]

No. Getting the personal trainer I can ogle.

[A]

Oh, you're just coming up with your own plan. You're not asking anybody.

[B]

Yeah, I pretty much have my own plan. I kind of know where my weaknesses are.

[A]

I knew a fellow who died of a heart attack on a treadmill recently. How old are you?

[B]

I am 70.

[A]

Oh, he was much younger than you. Good. 10 years younger.

[B]

I think I might live forever. So far, so good.

[A]

Everybody's doing okay until they're not. If I had a nickel for everybody I know. Who was doing okay just before they died? Several people. Now, over the years, I've come across people I've known, friends, acquaintances. Everything was going just fine. Next thing you know, they're dead.

[B]

Yeah, yeah, I know that. I retired when I was not quite 63. I could have went a few more years, but I had a couple of work colleagues that suddenly tipped. I said, no, not going to work till I drop.

[A]

Suddenly tipped? That's an interesting way of saying it. I almost picture teenagers finding them in a field by a farm and pushing them over.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

How many of your buddies have died?

[B]

My high school class, out of about 300, we got 48 gone already.

[A]

48 have gonorrhea?

[B]

No, they have left us already.

[A]

Oh, gone already?

[B]

I'm sorry, gone already? Yep.

[A]

You wipe out a class with gonorrhea and I have questions.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

The questions I want to ask you go as follows.

[B]

Okay.

[A]

What truth about yourself are you terrified to admit to? Even to yourself?

[B]

Oh, boy. I don't really know. I don't. Never thought about that.

[A]

All right. When was a time you felt an overwhelming sense of guilt?

[B]

Guilt?

[A]

These are powerful questions. Did you ever have a supernatural experience?

[B]

Yes, I have a Good friend. My best childhood friend was killed. He was a policeman shot in the line of duty. And five, six years later, I was going through kind of a. I don't want to say a rough patch of my life, but this wasn't where I wanted to be. And one night he was there, sitting on the end of my bed, just basically telling me, it's okay, it'll be okay. It wasn't a dream. It was just totally out of. Kind of an out of body experience. And he was there and he just so reassuring. And I just remember this total euphoric feeling come over me and it was just like. From there on, it was like, okay, everything's gonna be fine.

[A]

This is quite extraordinary for several reasons. Number one, it wasn't a spouse, it was a friend. I often hear stories of a closer relationship where something like this happens, but this is a pal. And how long had it been since he had died?

[B]

This was in the early 80s and he died in 78, so it was four or five years later.

[A]

That's another unusual part of this. I hear often about these things occurring closer to the time of death. One thing that isn't unusual, I hear so often about the sitting on the side of the bed image. You wake up and there the person is sitting on the side of the bed. That is something I've heard really more times than I can count. It almost makes me wanna set up at the end of my bed a special spot for someone in case I get a visitor. When you encounter your pal, do you

[B]

remember what he looked like, looked like he always looked.

[A]

He looked like he always looked. And you didn't say, wait a minute, I thought you were dead.

[B]

No, I just kind of was there and he was there and he just. It was just so reassuring.

[A]

It sounded like it was more than reassuring. It sounded like you felt euphoric.

[B]

Yeah, I think it was just the fact that he was there and everything was good, you know, he was. He was good. He said everything would be good for me. It was strange because the last time I saw him was about 10 days before he was killed. I just ran into him somewhere and we were chatting and as I left, I was actually on my bicycle. I was. I was biking and I ran into him. And as I was riding away, the last thing I said to him was, well, if I don't ever see you again, take care. And then as I was riding away, I thought to myself, I should go back. I should go back and talk to him again.

[A]

So you said, if I don't ever See you again. And you don't know why you said that?

[B]

Don't know just what I said.

[A]

And then as you biked away, you said I should really go back, but I didn't. That feeling of going back is interesting. And how long had you guys been pals?

[B]

Probably since we were four or five years old. He lived in the neighborhood. We would pretty much spend the whole summer together. He was a builder. He liked to build things. So we'd go around behind all the stores and find wood pallets and stuff, and he'd build. We called it the fort. It was really just a little house. We'd basically live in there all summer long, all night. And we'd go home for mules and stuff. But there was weeks at a time that I wouldn't sleep at home.

[A]

Where'd you build this? In the woods?

[B]

His backyard.

[A]

In his backyard. You built a house and lived there?

[B]

Yeah. It didn't have running water or electricity or anything, but it was. Had like a downstairs and then had a little upstairs with a trap door. So we'd climb up there, and that's where we'd put the sleeping bags and bring some comic books up there or something and hang out.

[A]

When he was killed, did he have a wife and kids recently?

[B]

Been married? I don't think he'd been married a year.

[A]

Wow. So that woman walks down the aisle with a guy she knows is a cop, right?

[B]

Yep.

[A]

And doesn't even last a year. What ended up happening with her?

[B]

I don't think she ever remarried. He was 23 at the time.

[A]

You know what you couldn't do, unfortunately? Find his widow and tell her that story. Because if he never appeared to her, that could leave some bad feelings that he stopped by to see you. You know what I'm saying?

[B]

Yeah. Yeah.

[A]

You'd want to find some loved one of his, maybe a mother or father, and say, hey, I gotta tell you, he's doing okay. I saw him last night and, you know, whatever your concerns are about what happened to him after he died, he's doing just fine. In fact, he's looking out for me. I would think parents would love to hear something like that. Especially when poor guy was only 23 when he died.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Do you remember the day after that? Visitation? Do you remember telling anybody about it?

[B]

I don't know.

[A]

If I ever have, you think I might be the first guy you've ever told that to?

[B]

Could very well be.

[A]

Huh. Well, that's quite a story. And your sense was, starting with that following day, that you let any Anxiety or stress about your situation just sort of disappear?

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

You were struggling in life, some things going on, and this reassuring voice from this person, long ago deceased, changed how you felt about your life and your direction moving forward and really seemed to help you, right?

[B]

Yep.

[A]

You think about all the people who are in similar situations, struggling here, struggling there, having difficulties, trying to work things out, really sort of lost knowing all sorts of people who have passed away and they're not getting visited. That's what I think about. I think about all the people who don't get a visit. What's the difference? Was your buddy really pushing hard for him to be allowed to. Spent a little time at the end of your bed and he just worked harder than other guys, really pitching his argument for why he should be allowed to do it, or are other people just. Folks are pretty sure they'll be able to work it out on their own. They don't need any help. My stepdad, when he lost his first wife, had her a few nights later sitting on the edge of the bed. He just woke up in the middle of the night and she was just sitting there. I gotta tell you, I think that freaked me out. Even if it was, say, just my wife on a given Tuesday, I wake up and she's just sitting there at the end of the bed. I think I'd scream no matter who it was. I just find that an odd place for someone to be sitting in the middle of the night. But no one is ever startled, no one is ever shocked, no one is ever freaked out. It's always, this is great. Middle of the night, a dead guy's at the end of my bed. There must be some part of you that just knows about this stuff. Some part of you that knows this is the way it all works because you're not startled.

[B]

Yeah. I don't think it's the dead people you need to worry about. It's the live ones. I had a case four or five years after that where I woke up one night and there was somebody in my room, a live one, robbing me.

[A]

Now that is terrifying.

[B]

That was terrifying.

[A]

You actually wake up to someone in your bedroom?

[B]

Yep. I wake up, I look at the clock, it's three o' clock on the dot. And there's somebody over by my dresser with a flashlight. My brother lived with me at the time, before I was married. And I thought, what's he doing? And I said, what are you looking for? And then this voice that I didn't recognize said, don't move or I'll Shoot you. I went, okay. It was right before the 87 World Series and had gotten tickets and they were sitting right there on my dresser. And my very next thought was, this F word is going to take my World Series tickets. I wasn't worried about him killing me. I was worried about him taking my tickets.

[A]

Well, first of all, as someone who had tickets to the 87 World Series, I can understand that. I don't know how you got the tickets, but I went and got in line at 5:30 in the afternoon the day before down at Dayton's in downtown St. Paul. I dragged a mattress that I found in an alley down there with me, and I laid on that mattress all night on a sidewalk waiting for Dayton's to open the next day and got my tickets.

[B]

I went to all four World Series,

[A]

you and I as well. And when they won it, when there was that toss from Gayetti to Herbeck ending it, did you cry?

[B]

I think I kinda had a little lump in my throat. But the funny thing was, my dad went with me to that last game. We're kind of way up in the upper deck and kind of in the left field corner. And my dad, who didn't really show a lot of emotion, he's on his feet, he's jumping up and down, waving his arms. I kind of stopped and looked and went like, what the heck?

[A]

You know, the one thing I would have done differently in my life if I did it over again, it's the only thing I ever think of that I'd do differently is instead of being there watching the Twins win it in 87, which is one of the great memories of my life. I was crying like a baby. It was profoundly emotional for me. It had been a long wait and baseball meant a lot to me back then. But what I would do differently, I'm sure my dad watched it at home alone, sitting in his chair, watching that game alone. And he was a Twins fan long before I was. He had been there in 65 at the old Met watching the World Series. And he was the one on so many summer days and nights, sat with his hams beer, listening to the radio. And if I could do it over again, I'd skip being at the Metro Dome for that game. And I'd have pulled up a little chair next to the old man to see his reaction when that throw came from Gayetti to Herbeck and it all ended. I would have loved to have just watched his face. Well, I have to ask, once that guy threatened you, what happened after that?

[B]

Well, then he said where are the drugs? I said, there's no drugs here. He goes, well, we'll see about that. And he leaves the room. And I got up and reached under my bed and got my baseball bat out from under the beds. I went out and looked down the stairs. Didn't see anybody. Woke my brother up and went down there, and he's not there. The patio door was open. I'd forgotten to lock it that night. That night. So he was just a guy just checking doors, you know. And so I called the cops, and the cops came. And of course, I'm standing in my boxes with my baseball bat. He was long gone by then, but didn't get the tickets. Got my wallet, but didn't get the tickets. So that's the important thing.

[A]

I wonder what thing you could have said to him that he wouldn't have seen coming that might have scared him off. What if you just said, I got a.38 pointed at you right now, and I got a nervous trigger finger. You can run or you can bleed. Be interesting to see what he'd say.

[B]

I've had that same thought. You know, at first I wasn't really scared just because I was mad because of the tickets.

[A]

I wonder if you could ever throw him with a line like, you know how guys bring notes to tellers and the note will say, you know, I have a gun. Imagine if you said to the guy, here, I got a note. Read this. It will tell you that I have a gun. Or if you say to him, I don't believe you have a gun. How are you in wrestling? I'm state wrestling champ. If you don't have a gun, you're in trouble. So promise me you have a gun, okay? And he'd promise. He'd say, I promise. And you could say, pinky swear. I just like to think of the different ways these nights could go. Well, quite astounding, those stories. I appreciate you taking all this time when you should be getting healthier. You're supposed to be working out.

[B]

I was just wrapping it up. The funny thing was, when I was on the treadmill listening to you, I'm thinking, like, well, Mishp calls me one of these days.

[A]

I wish I could say talking to me for this long does wonders for. And you've had the equivalent of a workout just in our time together. But I think I might have shaved a few minutes off your life.

[B]

Oh, no, this is great. I love listening to you, and it's great talking to you. And we hope you talk again sometime.

[A]

I do as well. Thanks again. For your time. So long now.

[B]

Take care.

[A]

Bye bye.

[B]

Bye bye.

[A]

The well Shire Memory Care Center, Medina and Bloomington. People hear Medina. Where's that? I want it convenient for me when I put my loved one in a memory care center. I want to make it so it's easy for me to visit them. Bloomington. I gotta go out to Bloomington. I want it convenient for me. Oh, you do, do you? How much of the time are you gonna be there at the Memory Care Center? A fraction of. A fraction of the amount of time your loved one's gonna be there. Those are the hours that count when your loved one's there alone. You're thinking convenience, how it could be made easier for you. God help me if you ever get Alzheimer's or dementia. You better hope there's someone wanting to make it easy for you, not for them. Tour the Wellshire and realize when you put your loved one at the well Shire in Medina and Bloomington, it's worth whatever trip you got to make out there because your loved one is taken care of at the state of the art facility in this region of the country. It's a revolution in memory care. It's a model that should be followed all over this country. The Wellshire is extraordinary. But go ahead, make it convenient for you and stick them in the assisted living facility down the street. Whether it's a birthday trip, a family reunion or just a fun getaway, booking a VRBO vacation rental means no worrying about surprises. VRBoCare and 247 Life Support have your back if something's off. The Loved by Guest filter helps you find top rated homes. And verified reviews mean real feedback from real VRBO guests. So you know exactly, exactly what you're booking. Honestly, I just booked my verbo because there was a sweet wine fridge. Hey, we all have our reasons. Don't walk into a surprise if you know you verbo terms apply. See vrbo.com trust for details. I'd like to talk briefly now about a topic that I've thought about quite a bit over the years. Not sure if I've brought it up before. My most recent musings on this particular topic have come from the story out of Washington D.C. the story of the fella out on Pennsylvania Avenue in front of the White House firing his gun, claiming to be Jesus Christ. He walked into a restricted area claiming he was Jesus Christ and shot at Secret Service officers before being shot and killed when they fired back. There's a cumulative effect with a lot of news stories with me. You hear enough of them over the years and eventually it hits critical mass and you need to talk about it. I don't know what number story this is for me. Over my years hearing so and so. Hearing. I'm sorry, hearing so and so thought he was Jesus Christ. It's only funny to me because I just think of what that would be like to be somebody who thinks they're Jesus Christ. I think that would just come with a whole lot of dominoes falling over the years. You've heard them, too. Every now and then, there's a story in the news. A disturbed individual who does something while claiming to be Jesus. Never claiming to be, oh, I don't know, Will Rogers or Lincoln. Nope. Jesus. And all sorts of different people from all sorts of different walks of life and all around the world, really. There's a guy in Australia right now who says he's Jesus Christ. And instead of treating him like a disturbed person, they have him on their version of Good Morning America. They have them on their. Their version of Good Morning America to talk to him about this. As though this is no different than interviewing someone on the latest weight loss fad. According to the Bible, Jesus promised a second coming. And this man, this is aj. AJ Claims that he is that second coming. He is Jesus, and that 2,000 years after he was crucified, he's come back to earth to spread the love of God. He's not alone in the studio this morning. His girlfriend believes that she's Mary Magdalene, and she says she remembers watching the crucifixion, watching in horror as Jesus was nailed to the cross. This is absolutely fascinating. First of all, what do I call you? Do I call you Jesus? My name is Jesus, obviously, but most people don't feel comfortable calling me Jesus, so I'm happy with that. Do you call him Jesus, Mary? On occasion. On occasion I do, yeah. How does it feel, though, Jesus, knowing that 99.9% of the are mocking you or laughing at you or saying, this man is bonkers? I've experienced that kind of treatment most of my life in the first century as well as the life now. So now, for some reason, that fella gets a full feature, whereas this fella here isn't even invited onto a local podcast. A man claiming to be Jesus attacks his neighbor. The victim says the Jesus man came at him with a tire iron. But that's not all. He says the Jesus man also sh at him with a BB gun. Police say the man who claims to be Jesus is actually shooting at his neighbor with a BB gun. Fred Padilla says he and his house are under attack. This guy has been terrorizing us since

[B]

February, on and off.

[A]

That guy is Fred's neighbor, Kenneth Peterson, who claims to be Jesus. This person here may have been good for an interview, at least a short one. But too late now.

[B]

He.

[A]

He's incarcerated. A Russian cult leader who claimed to be the reincarnation of Jesus Christ has been sentenced to 12 years in prison. Sergei Tarop was found guilty of harming the mental and physical health of his followers. Jesus comes in all sorts of packages, different presentations, different social strata. Here's a more pedestrian version. 5.911. What is your emergency?

[B]

Yes, this is Jesus Christ, and I just broke into the Pizza Hut. I broke the window and I'm here. So you don't work there? No, I just broke in.

[A]

And what was your name again?

[B]

My name is Jesus.

[A]

What's your last name?

[B]

Jesus Christ.

[A]

Okay.

[B]

And what do you look like? I look like Jesus.

[A]

Why'd you do that?

[B]

Because I'm Jesus. I can do whatever I want. We're tired of. Judas is on this earth. We're gonna clean this earth up.

[A]

Where do you live at?

[B]

I'm from heaven, sir.

[A]

Okay. And did you break a front window?

[B]

Yeah, I broke the door window, sir. Yeah. Had a Mountain Dew. All right. You gonna stay there for a minute?

[A]

Yeah. You ain't got any weapons or anything on you, do you?

[B]

No, I'm not violent, sir. Everybody's been treating me. I've been beat up in this town.

[A]

I'm from Indiana. You're from Indiana? Yeah. That's a real 911 call. Of course, you can hear the alarm going off in the background. Jesus is very calm, waiting for the authorities. And Jesus likes Mountain Dew. But the thing I think about with all of these stories is you clearly don't think you're Jesus. Early in life, when you're a child, you don't think that. You probably don't think it at adolescence, but somewhere, I assume in adulthood, it dawns on you and suddenly you have to deal with this. I cannot help but believe it's somewhat of a burden when you finally accept it or know it. Come to realize it, there must be a moment where you say, and again, I could be wrong, But I assume there's a moment where you say, oh, no, no, you are kidding me. I'm Jesus. This changes everything. Up until this moment, I thought I was old Derek Kreitzman, Union Pipefitter. I'm not. So many decisions have to follow this moment right here. You're not Derek Kreitzman. You're Jesus. You now accept it. You realize it. Okay, now what? Suppose I best go tell the boss, huh? And the other fellas. Surely some of my responsibilities here are going to need to shift. Boys, gather round. Got some news for you. Oh, and I didn't even think about my wife. Carol. I gotta call her. All I wanted to do tonight was have the fellows over for beers and to watch the game. Do I still do that? I don't think so. Carol, is that you? Sorry to be calling you at work. I know you're busy. Ah, I just. I'm now realizing who I am. And. Sweetie, it's a game changer. Hopefully not for you, but it's a game changer in my life. Carol, I am. I'm Jesus, the savior of the world, and you are smack dab in the middle of the second Coming. Kiddo, you are married to the man. And I mean the man. And, sweetie, I know it's a lot to take in, but think about it. You've always been jealous of Denise and Kate and their well to do husbands. This has got to be something you can hold over them when they're yakking about their trips to Italy and all that. But before I go any further, can you just tell me you're. You're hanging with me here, Carol. Must be something wrong with the connection. Sweetheart, I. I will. I will talk to you more about it back at home. Don't freak out on me. Seriously, the odds of me being a pretty decent catch just went up. I think you got to give me that. Anyway, I'll talk to you later. I don't know what's happening with our connection. I don't know what the last words were of the fellow who was killed in Washington, D.C. on Pennsylvania Avenue. But I can imagine the Secret Service walking up to him after shooting him and hearing him say, do you realize who you've just killed? See you in three days, boys. That would throw the Secret Service for a loop, wouldn't it? They would realize they have never killed anyone who has come back three days later. It would leave them with far more questions than answers. They would have to ask themselves, are we going to have to kill him again? Or in that state, will he even be capable of being killed? And if not, what's plan B? And then there's the question. If he does actually come back in three days, maybe we should just drop our guns and join his religion. As I said, more questions than answers for the Secret Service. Now, I spent a fair amount of time today reading, reading about all the different people over the years who have thought they were Jesus. It's astounding how many stories there are out there. I mean, I'm not even talking about Jim Jones. He thought he was the reincarnation of Jesus and Buddha. And. And I think this is so strange. First of all, do you remember Jim Jones, the people's Temple founder? He orchestrated that whole Jonestown mass suicide. Well, he thought he was the reincarnation of Jesus, Buddha, and Lenin, Vladimir Lenin. Why did he throw him in there? And secondly, how can you be the reincarnation of more than one person? But I'm not even talking about him, nor am I talking about David Koresh. He believed he was the Christ. He said Charles Manson, who. I'm also not referring to here when I say people who think they're Jesus. I mean average people out there who just come to believe they're Jesus, not the big time Jesus guys. Charles Manson thought he was the reincarnation of Jesus and the devil. Come on, pick one. You go with the devil, people will be with you. They would have said, yeah, yeah, okay. We won't argue with you, Charlie. You should have just picked one. That Russian fella who's going to prison, what did they say for 12 years? You know what he was before he realized he was. Before he realized he was Jesus. He was a traffic cop. He was just a traffic cop. And then came to believe he was Jesus. These are the kind of people I'm interested in. But here's my favorite story from the world of people out there who come to believe they're Jesus. In the 1950s, there was a psychologist who conducted a famous and rather controversial experiment at a Michigan state mental hospital. He took three paranoid schizophrenic patients who all believed they were Jesus. He placed them in the same ward. His goal was to see if, in confronting each other with contradictory realities, would their delusions come apart as they encountered other people who thought they were Jesus. Astoundingly. Or maybe not. The men instead rationalized it, claiming the other Jesuses were either robots, dead or from another planet. You know what I would have done if I were that psychologist? And this is probably why I shouldn't be allowed into a Michigan mental hospital or I should be a patient there. I would have taken these three guys aside and I would have said, I want each of you privately to come up with a test, a test that, you know, would clearly determine the real Jesus Christ. And then we'll gather and we'll conduct your tests. There's got to be an Easy way to tell who the real Jesus Christ is. So come up with a secret way for all of us to find out who's the real Jesus. And we'll conduct these tests tomorrow, and only one of you will supposedly be able to pass the test. Right, you guys go come up with the test now. And then I'd bring them together for the big test the next day. And I'd say, okay, boys, let's start with Chuck. What do you have, Chuck? And Chuck would say, well, I got three pieces of paper right in front of me and three pens. What we're going to do here is we're going to write a legible paragraph using only our left hand. Lenny and Wally would say, what the hell, we can't do that. And Chuck would say, ha ha, everybody knows Jesus was left handed. And the other guys would say, that's not been determined. This isn't a test. Get out of here. Then it would be Lenny's turn. He'd say, all right, whoever can juggle these rubber balls is Jesus. Willie and Chuck would say, lenny, you worked in the circus for years, you can juggle. We can't. Lenny would say, don't you think Jesus could juggle if he wanted to? I think he could. He raised a dead guy. I think he could juggle. But the others would reject that test. And then Willie would say, I can imagine Jesus would be able to recite the starting lineup of the Mets in the 69 World Series. And that would just enrage Chuck and Lenny. They know Willie is a baseball encyclopedia. But Willie would argue, shouldn't Jesus be able to make himself a walking baseball encyclopedia? Couldn't he do that with a snap of his fingers? You know, it would be great if a psychiatrist at that point would say, you know what I'm going to do, boys? I think I've got a way to figure this out. This is what I'm going to do. I'm going to stand out here in the hallway and I'm going to throw a live hand grenade into your room. Whichever one of you falls on it is Jesus. Okay? And then the other two are frauds. That sound good. And the three guys would look at each other confused, concerned, really worried. And the smart one, Lenny, would say, doctor, I tell you what, I'll make this real easy. I like your idea. Let's go with it. Throw the grenade into our little room, but do it with just Chuck and Willie in there. I'll wait out in the hallway with you. And when neither Willie nor Chuck fall on the grenade, you'll know I'm the true Jesus. And afterward I can help you clean up. Of course, then the psychiatrist could say, lenny, are you prepared to surrender the throne if either Chuck or Willie come back to the psych ward in three days, whole, healthy, having come back from the dead? But Lenny's no dummy. He'd say, well, then we're back to that juggling.