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- [00:00]
A
The roofing industry is broken, and we've got the fix. At HirePro, we help homeowners do the same thing a roofer would do when it hails on their own house. Own the project, delegate the tasks, and keep the compensation. But you don't have to take my word for it. You could ask Chrissy. Chrissy, how'd it go? It went great. You educated us on how everything worked, showed us behind the curtain, so to speak. And after our $25,000 roof was replaced, we walked away with almost $6,000 for the work we put in. And what work was that? We got the permit and we picked the color. Hire pro handled everything else. You did a great job. And I'm not even being paid to say that. If anyone's listening and has a storm damage claim, call them. Don't hire a roofer, hire a pro. That's awesome. I appreciate the kind words. And I think you just made up our new motto. All right, Joe, you're up. So if insurance has approved your roof replacement, give these guys a call at 651-402-3400 or visit them online at. Hire a dot pro. That's h. Uh. And then put the dot there. Pro. For 55 years, Pleasureland RV has helped families create memories that last a lifetime. Now it's our turn to say thank you. Join us for customer appreciation deals now through August 1st at all 10 Pleasureland RV locations. Get a new Grand Design Transcend for $120 a month. And when you buy a new RV, get a free Maluna cooler plus two camp chairs in honor of 55 years, 55 units are now priced under dealer cost for a limited only while supplies last. Looking for a great deal on a cargo trailer, We've got over 50 with light hail damage, every one marked with special pricing to match. From all of us At Pleasure Land RV, thank you for 55amazing years of adventure. Here's to the next 55 years. Stock number 992. 25 payment calculator with 10% down for 180 months and 6.99% APR. Sale price $14,755. See dealer for complete details. We are reeling and riding and rolling, staggering into another podcast. A little shaky maybe, but lurching nonetheless toward a real show here. My name is Mishke, and I'm in the zone. Whirling and swirling and gyrating to a brand new, brand new podcast today. Swaying, shaking, churning, vibrating, convulsing and turning. A little dizzy, a little woozy, jiggling, quivering Oscillating. Moving into a brand new podcast here. Look out. I have no idea what's going on there. None at all. My apologies for that. We live in strange times, folks. Everything is a little strange these days, don't you think? Don't you feel it in your bones? Everything's just a little strange these days. I bet today all over the nation that sentence is being uttered by more than a handful of folks. It's strange out there. Real strange. Oh, yeah. Perhaps the most repeated words in America these days are, we live in strange times. And yet, even as I say those words, I'm aware of the absurdity of that statement. Because when weren't times strange? It's tempting for me to lament how inane and wickedly worthless and powerfully disturbing so much of what I encounter in this culture is these days. But then, then I catch myself and I have to ask, when wasn't it strange? You have to ask yourself that, people. When wasn't it strange? It's just strange now in a new way, in a way I have not been acquainted with in my life. The strangeness I look upon in my country right now is a brand new strangeness to me. Whereas the strangeness I saw when I was young was much of the strangeness I was born into. Could I not have stood up in the 1970s and said, oh, we live in some strange times? Of course I could. A president was resigning. Wait, what? Resigning? Yeah, he committed crimes. And a new president came in and pardoned him of all crimes. Talk about strange times. And how about the manson family? The 70s were the decade of the Manson family. And there was that bizarre Jonestown massacre in Guyana with Jim Jones. The Reverend Jim Jones. What the heck? Drink the Kool Aid, campers. Talk about strange. And there were serial killers, Son of Sam and the Zodiac killer, and the BTK killer, and Ted Bundy and John Wayne Gacy. Wow. And the Symbionese Liberation army was kidnapping Patty Hearst and brainwashing her to be a terrorist. Three Mile island almost had a nuclear meltdown. Articles could be found everywhere about killer bees coming to America from down south. And there were long, long lines at all the gas stations. And yet I was having the time of my life Not a care in the world Livin it up, ridin high, cuttin loose Just enjoying the living hooty hooski out of childhood Times could not have been better. I would have said Someone could have said to me, boy, these are strange times we're living in. And I would have said yeah, I s' pose now grab me my water ski and start that boat. It's twilight, my favorite time to go water skiing. It's when the water feels like whipped cream. And I've never been more alive in my life. Yeah, but it's strange out there. Well, it's always been strange. Look at the 90s, the 1990s. Some people out there are saying, no, that wasn't so bad. That was before the Internet. Things were a little bit better then. It's the Internet that messed everything up. Well, maybe, yes, it was the time before the Internet. But the 90s were strange. I mean, I was having a good time. I was raising boys, raising hell, starting a lovely radio career, singing with my piano at some bars, All Pleasant on the Western front. Ha ha. But the 90s, come on, man, look out. You had that Heaven's Gate suicide cult. You had the Columbine shooting. You had the Unabomber. You had that whole horrible Oklahoma City federal building bombing. You had Waco. You had Jeffrey Dahmer's arrest. You had Ruby Ridge. You had the OJ trial, Y2K panic. You had that sarin gas attack in the Tokyo subway. Clinton was impeached over an affair with an intern. I mean, someone stood up around then, they had to and said, we live in some strange times, man. I don't know. Pick a decade. Pick a decade. How about the 1340s? Well, you're going back a ways now, Tommy. The 1340s, what a hellscape. You think these are strange times, my gillicuddy? The Black Plague arrives and kills close to half of Europe. Half the population. Somewhere between a third and a half roving bands of people, sometimes thousands strong, march from town to town, whipping themselves, whipping themselves bloody in public squares, thinking they could atone for all the sins of humanity and end this plague. They just went around town to town, whipping themselves over and over again. Surely this will stop the plague. Ouch. Ouch. Owie. And all across Europe, people were deciding the Jews are behind this plague. They must be poisoning the wells on purpose. And that's where the plague's coming from. So there were these pogroms, these attempts all over the place to attack Jews, blaming them, blaming them for the black plague. If I had a sawbuck for every time in this world, people conveniently blamed Jews for things. It's like there's a big red button people push when they can't figure out who else to blame. Hit that button, Bob, the one that says Jews on it. I think they're taking the rap for this. One, they gotta be involved somehow. Were they blaming the Jews because they never caught on to the whole Jesus thing? Cause that doesn't really make sense. Couldn't you just as easily blame the Buddhists or the Muslims? How about all those pagan religions, those nature religions? Why didn't they get blamed? Can you imagine? You're having a rough day. And I'm sure if you were a Jew during this time, you were having a rough day because there was a plague killing half the population. So you're having a rough day, life's not looking so good. And then you see a bunch of people coming, lots of them. You don't get it at first until a neighbor alerts you, you're being blamed for the. For the entire plague. A rough day just got a little bit rougher. Is there any way at all, fellas, I can convince you I did not start this plague? I want to tell you right off the bat, I don't know how to start them. What's the mechanism for starting a plague? I don't have that knowledge. I know. You got upset. You were ticked off. You hated this plague. I hate it, too. And you pressed the red button. You just had to find a scapegoat. You press the red button that said Jew on it, and here you come. I get it. That red button is going to be pushed for many a year. You know, during that plague, the University of Paris medical facility actually issued an official report blaming astrological planetary alignments for the plague. They formally endorsed astrology. The University of Paris medical facility. It's the alignment of the planets. I bet there was a Jewish guy somewhere going, yeah, yeah, that's it. Alignment of the planets. Yeah. It's hard to find a decade without quite a few folks suffering terribly due to some form of stupidity. So, strange times we have. Yes, but they've always been strange. What can we do but laugh and look to tomorrow. Look to the sunrise tomorrow for better news. Climb up there into the crow's nest. Hundred feet up, look to the horizon. See if the good stuff's coming. Sometimes things are bad, but we don't know they're bad. And ignorance is certainly quite often bliss. Take the American bathroom, for instance. This week I learned from more than one news source that the American bathroom is the deadliest room in the entire house. And many experts have been asking how we have allowed that to happen. How have we allowed our bathroom to become a death trap? Well, I'll tell you how. At least in my case, I didn't know it was a death trap. My Bathroom's the deadliest room in the house. No one told me that before this week or I'd a done something about it. Cause I'll tell you, I walk into my bathroom at home and I feel a sense of peace. I say I know what this room is all about. I understand this room. This room makes sense to me. I have this room down. I'm the master of this here room. Never felt more comfortable as I feel walking into this room. Talk about your peace and serenity. I'm gonna close that door and be alone in a room I know well. Nope. Deadliest room in the house. I was ignorant and that was the source of my bliss. Now I know too much because I've read about this bathroom business. The deadly bathroom. Now I'll look back at my wife before entering the bathroom. I'll look at her and say, honey, I'm going in. Just to watch her drop to her knees and pray to the Almighty to spare her husband the bathroom death sentence that's being handed out all over the nation right now. From what I read, you're at a dinner party, someone says, excuse me please, just gonna use your restroom. We call it the death room now. Used to be the restroom. Deadliest room in our house. What on earth goes on in there? I don't know. I didn't read beyond the headlines. Just read that it's the deadliest room in the house. Mm. You go in there if you want to, but you sign a waiver right outside the door there. Alright, Clearing us of all responsibility. But I just. I just have to pee. That's what everybody says. And aren't those some famous last words, huh? Last words of countless people who've perished in that death trap. Well, what exactly is dangerous about it? Ah, now we're talking. I'll read the news beyond the headline and find out. Bathrooms kill. They're wet, they're slippery. They periodically require us to contort ourselves. They periodically have us stepping over something, stepping onto something slippery. Slippery floors, a slippery tub. They have us dealing with appliances plugged in, plugged into a wall, plugged in near water. And on top of that, the God awful germs that are in there. Lord have mercy. The germs. It's a death trap, the bathroom. Tempered GL on shower doors can easily shatter and have shattered often. And I could go on and on. It's the deadliest room in the house. And only now are experts finally making suggestions on how to once and for all alter this room so it's no longer the equivalent of an execution chamber.
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B
I want to tell you about a room in your home that is more dangerous than any other. And you walk into it several times every single day without a second thought. It's not the kitchen with its knives and hot stove. It's not the stairs, though those are dangerous, too. It's your bathroom. That small, ordinary, private room where you wash, bathe, and use the toilet is statistically one of the most dangerous places you will ever spend time. One of the most dangerous places you will ever spend time. One of the most dangerous places you will ever spend time.
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A
And you people thought I was kidding. You thought I was joking around with you. Did they joke around during the Black Plague? I don't think so. Some things are way, way too disturbing to joke about.
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B
A startling number of the falls, fainting spells, and even heart events happen right there behind that bathroom door. Right there. Right there. Right there. And most people have absolutely no idea, so they take no precautions at all. The people who get hurt in the bathroom are overwhelmingly the ones who never realized it was dangerous in the first place. And so they did. The ordinary, everyday things that quietly stack the odds against them.
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A
That's me. That's me. I didn't know it was dangerous. That was my happy place.
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B
Today, I'm going to walk you through your own bathroom. Danger by danger. Danger by danger. Danger by danger.
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A
Danger by danger.
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B
And show you exactly why each one is risky and precisely what to do about it. I'll cover the falls, the hidden strain on your heart, the dangers of hot water, and the specific reasons your body is more vulnerable in that room than almost anywhere else. Because when you understand it, every specific hazard makes sense. Three things come together in that room to create the perfect storm. The perfect storm. The perfect storm.
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A
The perfect storm.
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B
First, the surfaces. The bathroom is full of the hardest, most unforgiving surfaces in your entire home. Ceramic tile floors, porcelain sinks and toilets. The hard edge of the bathtub, glass doors. So if you fall in the bathroom, you're far more likely to hit something hard and to be seriously hurt. The bathroom is the one room that's constantly wet water on the floor, water in the tub, condensation, soap, and wet, slippery surfaces are the leading cause of slips. And third, the specific activities you do in there. Standing up from the toilet, getting in and out of the bath or shower, bending, reaching, and being exposed to hot water are exactly the movements and exposures that challenge blood pressure, balance, and heart all in one small, often cramped space.
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A
Dear God.
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B
You will walk into your bathroom several times today and every day. For the rest of your life, make sure it's a safe room rather than a dangerous one. Look at your own bathroom with new eyes today and make it safe.
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A
I will. I will. I promise.
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B
Take care of yourself.
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A
Thanks. Were you recently injured by a vending machine that owed you a Snickers bar and delivered only violence? Did a mall escalator try to eat your shoe and your very will to live? I'm asking you, were you injured recently? I don't mean stubbed your toe and cried a little bit injured. I mean full cinematic injury. Did a grocery cart flat out betray you? Did a revolving door decide today was the day? Here's the thing nobody tells you. Pain is expensive. Ice packs don't grow on trees, ergonomic pillows can cost more than your car payment, and your boss does not care that you now walk like a haunted scarecrow. This is where Brad, Shaw and Bryant comes in. People, Attorneys at law. They're outraged on your behalf, personally offended. They see your X rays and they get emotional. You call Bradshaw and Bryant and they build your case. You don't lift a finger because your finger's in a splint. You won't pay a dime until they get you that compensation package. So you have no worries. You got the best working for you. The best in the state. Bradshaw and Bryant, your own personal Batman and Robin. Find them at MinnesotaPersonal Injury.com as technology becomes more complex, cyber reality dominates the culture, and AI becomes an endless anxious discussion. Simple, old human storytelling becomes all the more precious. And that's what you'll find on the Mishke podcast. In the end, we're all just people. Folks with our brilliance and our absurdities and stories about people. Well, they never get old. The Mishke podcast. Wherever you get your podcasts, we're running out of July. We're coming to the end of that big 358 point buck special at Minneapolis St. Paul Plumbing, Heating, air and Electric. The wondrous deal where they took the 250 years of America and the 108 years of MSP, put them together, came up with 358 and said, we're knocking that off heating and air conditioning equipment in the month of July. You need work done, contact msp. Take advantage of this deal. I want to tell you something. If Minneapolis St. Paul plumbing, heating, Air and Electric had only been around 10 years, I'd still be going with him. What impressed me was when I had him into my house, and I've now had him into my house often for all sorts of workplumbing. Heating air, electric work. The level of professionalism combined with the humanity, the warmth, the sense of caring about me and my family, the honesty, the openness, the integrity of all of that is so impressive to me. I can't imagine going anywhere else. And the 358 bucks special sure is an incentive to call them before July is done. Because when July's done, the deal's done.
- [23:16]
C
If you record your name and reason for calling, I'll see if this person is available.
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A
Mishki, thanks.
- [23:23]
C
Please stay on the line. I'm sorry, this person is not available. If you would like to leave an additional message, please reply after the tone.
- [23:37]
A
Hey, Bill Mishke checking in. Thought I'd give it a try, see if I could find you around. I'm in the middle of a. Hey, Bill, can you hear me? I can hear you.
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C
Yeah. I should learn how to use a phone, huh?
- [23:49]
A
How old are you, Bill?
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C
61.
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A
Yep. You should by now. You definitely have that down, brother.
- [23:55]
C
About damn time. I am so sorry. I've missed like, seven of your phone calls.
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A
Seventy, I think, would be more like it. What do you suppose the reason has been, Bill?
- [24:03]
C
And you just happened to hit me on those days when there was 10 people in my cube?
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A
10 people in your cube?
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C
Yeah, just, you know, people coming and going. How do you do this? How do you do that? Hey, we're going to get that report done.
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A
It's sad that we've arrived at a period in history where there can be 10 people in your cube.
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C
The paycheck cashes, so it's all good.
- [24:21]
A
No, I know, but when you think back, I don't know, The Old Frontier, 1857.
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C
Oh, yeah.
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A
You're mentioning to one of the fellows there that in the future there will be 10 guys in a person's cube. I don't know how that would go over.
- [24:35]
C
Yeah, they'd think you were talking crazy.
- [24:37]
A
First of all, there'd be the grief over the fact that there will one day be Cubes.
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C
Oh, yeah, yeah.
- [24:43]
A
Then, you know, when they look at that beautiful open country there, that open range before them under those incredible skies, to think that there will be 10 people crammed in there. Rather than being able to see the horizon, they'll only be able to see the button on the guy's plaid shirt and his big belly four inches from their face.
- [25:04]
C
Yeah, it's different in broadcasting, right? Is there a ton of people around? Or you go into the studio and you just kind of do your thing and then mingle with the Office folk.
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A
I'm in the old outpost, which is at the end of a dead end hallway here at Hubbard Radio. Not too far away from me are other radio enterprises. If I go down the hallway here, I'll run into the women's station. That would be your my talk 107. If I go through the glass door there and cross the hallway, we'll hit KS95. I can head down another hallway, find the GL folks, the garage logic crowd. There's another place I could go and find the score north sports people. Then I could head to the basement and it's television city. I could go upstairs and it would be corporate offices, the big honchos, the top dogs. But at the end of my dead end hallway here is just my old outpost and it's a little room I'm in by myself. No one ever comes around. I'm on my own. I arrive and have my little key to get in the door. I come up the stairs, walk down the hallway to the old outpost, much like my days working night radio.
- [26:16]
C
And you're good with that?
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A
Well, as you said, it's a paycheck. You know, it all comes down to it. Man's gotta eat.
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C
Sure.
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A
Hey, I hear a lot of those 10 people right now. Could I talk to them at all?
- [26:32]
C
It was two gentlemen walking by.
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A
Does one of the guys have sort of a bad pair of old man slacks on and a pretty good sized belly and sort of an ugly shirt, male pattern baldness going on there as well?
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C
Well, I can't point fingers here on
- [26:48]
A
that one, but I know you're dealing with it as well. You work in the same place, but they're dealing with it, aren't they, those two guys?
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C
Oh, yeah.
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A
This cubicle you're in, what's the color? Is it beige?
- [26:59]
C
No, it's kind of an off white
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A
as opposed to beige. Do you have a significant other in your life?
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C
I do.
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A
Tell me about this person. How's the relationship?
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C
All in all, pretty good. Just some health things right now.
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A
Oh, I'm sorry to hear that. I assume the health issues are with her.
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C
Yeah, they're with her.
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A
That makes it tough. That's a giant truck driven into the middle of the road. The road of life you're cruising down.
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C
Yeah, it's. It's one of those things that you don't think is coming your way. I think everybody thinks, oh, we'll be fine and we'll walk hand in hand through the park in our 80s or whatever. And life has different plans sometimes.
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A
Is this Situation with your wife's health, is it quite serious?
- [27:47]
C
Yeah, it could be. It could be. Ideally, she'll get an organ transplant, which I guess. Kidneys.
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A
Kidneys. Is it a situation where you're seeking someone to donate a kidney?
- [28:01]
C
She is now approved, so she's just gotten on the list, so now we can pursue that.
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A
Does she have a big family?
- [28:11]
C
No, no, neither one of us do.
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A
It's a fascinating thing to me, these moments in life where someone donating a kidney would really help out and people have a kidney to donate often. And then there's this strange moment where you begin to look at, well, how close am I to this individual? Is it my sister? Well, that's very different than if it's my friend. Is it my best friend? That also would be different than just a kind of good friend. Every now and then there are these absolute saints seemingly who say, hey, someone needs a kidney, I'll give them one. I don't know what's all involved in healing up after you donate a kidney. I know you do heal up and I know you can offer a kidney and you can save a life, but we're all not lined up somewhere saying, hey, anybody need a kidney? I'll give one.
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C
Right, right. That's 100% true. And I think if you're healthy and don't eat a kidney, I think you're probably down for four to six weeks.
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A
I know that sometimes there have been people in India who have left a bar and next thing they know, they're waking up in a hotel bathtub filled with ice and someone took their kidney. Makes me think, how hard can it be to get that thing? I mean, these guys who are jack of all trades types are just grabbing it and there's this. Now imagine the person is not just needing a kidney. They need one now. No one else is offered, and they are going to die. Well, that's when the rubber really meets the road. Now, you say this person lives if I donate a kidney, dies if I don't. That is a situation where it would be hard, very, very hard to justify not giving them a kidney. In fact, I can't think of a justification other than I don't wanna. I don't wanna go through that. Oh, God, I gotta go through that. Life's hard enough. But we're talking about saving a human life here, right? I think you'd have to do it. I think a person would have to do it. And I wonder how many times I'm really serious about this. How many times someone knows someone who needs a kidney and they're a match and it's time. It's time. It's now or never. This person is going to die. And you say, I can't do it. I wonder how many times that happens. And the person passes and what the person who couldn't give the kidney says to themselves the rest of their life. Well, let's just say in this scenario it's an in law and there's a match and that in law is looking around saying, anyone else offering anything? No. No. Family members? Well, there aren't any. How about friends? Well, no. And I'm the only one. Yep. And if I don't, she dies. Yep. Everybody's looking, looking at this guy going, come on. And he's saying, ah. Did I mention I'm squeamish? I've not encountered a lot of these real intimate stories in this area, but I'm suddenly fascinated by it all. I know people who have put it out there on Facebook. Anybody got a kidney? Crickets? I said, anybody got a kidney? Crickets. Those are awkward moments. But I'll tell you one thing, your wife's going to get one. I can feel it.
- [31:59]
C
You got a feeling on that?
- [32:00]
A
Yeah, yeah, I can feel it. Yeah, I can feel it. I think she's going to be just fine. You know, there are two places to feel things. One is the chest, and that's fear. And you never trust that. That's just you being scared. So you go with your stomach. Your stomach is rarely going to be wrong. And when the feeling is there, then it's oh, oh, good, oh, good. And that's where I'm feeling it.
- [32:24]
C
How's your success rate on this feeling stuff?
- [32:27]
A
Intuition is right far more than using the rational mind or logic. It's not infallible. But intuition in my world is what I count on and what I trust and what I look to more than anything else. Throughout my life I've gone with feel first and the logic has come later and has proven the feeling to be right. So you ever come close to death?
- [32:54]
C
By my standards, no. But we used to have a boat and we just go out in the middle and anchor it, swim off of was an inboard upward. So there was sort of that sun deck on the back that covered up the motor. Anyway, I was pulling up the anchor and I was standing on that, got the anchor almost up, wrapping it around your elbow and then through your hand and around your elbow, that sort of thing. I fell in anchor tied to my body, started heading towards the bottom and I just slowly unwound the rope and swam to the top.
- [33:28]
A
How badly could you get the anchor rope around you?
- [33:31]
C
20ft, wrapped around my forearm.
- [33:33]
A
Oh, you were wrapping it around your forearm?
- [33:37]
C
Yeah, you know, kind of like with an extension cord or so.
- [33:41]
A
Then it's all around and you go down and you have to unravel it. That'd be an embarrassing way to die. There you are with this perfectly wound rope, just perfectly wound. Someone finding you could say, boy, I'll just take it just like he has it, and we're good to go the next time we need the anchor. Or someone could say, who needs an anchor when we could just tie the rope to this body? We could use that to keep our boat in place. You ever known anybody to use a human body for an anchor after the person has passed naturally? Person passes naturally. Maybe they're out fishing. Bobby had a good run. I think he'd want us to use him this way. Tie the rope around him. His last official bit of service to humanity. He's an anchor.
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C
Would that work for more than, like, a day, though? Don't you feel it?
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A
Who fishes for longer than a day? You just use it for that particular evening. And again, you didn't have an anchor. You're tired of the wind knocking you around. Bobby has died. You tried cpr. It didn't work. You didn't try that hard, let's face it. But you tie the rope to him, you throw them over, all of a sudden, the rest of the fishing, the rest of the evening is wonderful. Question. Is that unethical?
- [34:51]
C
I don't think so, but I think society would think so.
- [34:57]
A
Well, forget society momentarily. Say it was your father. He was used at the end as an anchor. Disrespectful or no,
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C
I think it might depend on the person's wishes.
- [35:09]
A
Well, your father was not able to weigh in, pardon the pun, because no one ever asked him. You're going to have to guess what he would have wanted again. You've just learned your dad has passed away and that the entire evening afterward, he's been used as a boat anchor.
- [35:24]
C
My father would not have wanted that.
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A
Wait a minute. What had he told you in life that convinces you he would not want to be a boat anchor for one evening at the end of.
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C
I mean, he. He never wore jeans. He. He would get out to do. He was a. He was a very talented woodworking, crafting person. He. He would iron his khakis to go out and work in the garage. So the idea of being dead, literally dead weight at the end of a rope at the bottom of a lake would not have sat well with him.
- [35:53]
A
Well, did it sit well with him to be at the bottom of a hole in the ground, in the dirt, decaying? How'd that sit with him? To learn that's the way it was going to end for him?
- [36:04]
C
He actually was cremated.
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A
He irons his khakis, but he's fine with his whole body being torched. That's a conflicted guy. I think you could argue if that guy who irons his khakis wants to be torched after he dies, wants to be completely torched, burned to a crisp, he probably would be okay, quietly resting at the bottom of a nice lake with a rope tied to him, helping out his buddies.
- [36:31]
C
Yeah, I guess when you think of it, the pragmatic.
- [36:35]
A
I'm not even thinking about it. Pragmatically, you allowed your father, knowing that he ironed his khakis to be burned up. It's like leaving the iron on a little too long. Would he be comfortable burning his khakis? You would say, no, no, no. He never would want to burn his khakis. He burned his entire body. So the same guy who, if you put that iron on his khakis and left it there and just burned them, burned them up. Look, dad, I'm burning your khakis. What's wrong with you? What's wrong with you?
- [37:03]
C
Dead.
- [37:03]
A
You're perfectly okay being cremated. Well, that's different. I'll be dead then. And when he was used as an anchor, he was dead. Same thing. Right? What I'm saying is he doesn't really have a leg to stand on. He can't say to you, after you purposely torch his khakis with the iron. What kind of a moron does that? And you say, you're gonna be cremated, dad. And he says, well, that's different. That's after I die. And not believe that that guy also would use that same logic for being used as an anchor. Now, I'm not saying it's for more than one evening. After that evening, we can cremate him. We can toss his ashes. Where were your old man's ashes tossed?
- [37:45]
C
Both he and my mom are up in Monticello.
- [37:49]
A
How they doing? So is your mom cremated?
- [37:52]
C
Both of them are, yeah.
- [37:54]
A
Did they mix the ashes together?
- [37:56]
C
No. Separate containers.
- [37:57]
A
I kind of like the idea of mixing mine and my wife's together.
- [38:00]
C
So are you guys going to Cremation Realm?
- [38:02]
A
I think so. The idea is you're going to disintegrate anyway. Why not get it over with over time? Everybody is going to disintegrate to nothing. Why not get to nothing as quickly as possible? What's with the delay? I don't understand the delay. Do you understand the delay?
- [38:19]
C
I don't. I had a co worker though, who was adamant that she wanted to be as preserved as possible in a. In a casket or. Excuse me, the casket or coffin.
- [38:29]
A
Casket and coffin denote shape. The shape of the box. The coffin is that classic Dracula shape, whereas the casket. Casket is more rectangular.
- [38:40]
C
Okay, well, I think she was going for the more rectangular one.
- [38:43]
A
I wonder why more people don't say, what? I don't want to be in a little box under the dirt night after night after night. This quiet little box under the dirt. There I am with his quizzical expression night after night in the quiet, slowly, slowly rotting away. And another night and another night and a long night in the darkness with this strange countenance slowly getting more and more pathetic in appearance and more long nights in the quiet and the dark in the little box deep under the ground. Weeks, months, years passing. The quiet, the hole, the dirt, the decay, the rot. That doesn't sound appealing.
- [39:46]
C
Not to me. No.
- [39:48]
A
I wish I would have met your dad. I would have liked to have sat him down and said, you have two choices. You pick it. You gotta pick one. Either you die and get to be used for one evening as a boat anchor or this weekend you got to get a kidney removed and donate it to a stranger. Your call. I think the old man's going to go with the boat anchor. I think no matter what argument I deliver, the old man is going to be stuck, given the thumbs up to being a boat anchor. And isn't that extraordinary that your old man wanted to be a boat anchor after death? I mean, I'm saying that because in all my arguments he would say that eventually he'd realize logically that's the only place he can land.
- [40:33]
C
Yeah. I don't know. You know, when you go through it like you and I just did, why wouldn't you be on board with the boat anchor?
- [40:44]
A
I don't know why we went down the boat anchor road. I don't. I don't know. Why?
- [40:48]
C
Because I fell in with the anchor.
- [40:50]
A
Because you were an anchor at one point. You were an anchor. That's right.
- [40:53]
C
Yeah.
- [40:54]
A
You were an anchor. Yeah.
- [40:56]
C
Before I forget, you interviewed someone. I don't know if they were a deacon. You'd called someone and you were talking to them about prayer and you had a definition of prayer. It was very simple and straightforward, and I can't remember what it is. And I've gone back to try and listen to episodes and I can't find, you know, it's tough to find a 10 minute phone call in the middle of a hour plus podcast. Wait.
- [41:30]
A
Well, I'm glad I got a chance to visit with you, Deacon John.
- [41:34]
C
You know, in my line of work, you take every single phone call because you never know who's calling.
- [41:39]
A
Yeah. And are you called on sometimes in the middle of the night?
- [41:43]
C
Yep. Calls in the evening are usually somebody that's seriously ill, and they want somebody there to pray with them and be with their loved ones when they're dying.
- [41:53]
A
Can I ask you a serious question? Someone calls you, someone needs prayers desperately, you show up and you begin to pray. Okay. What do you think is happening? What is the force at work? You're praying.
- [42:11]
C
And you are praying that the person that is near death is their heart is disposed for forgiveness. You're praying for the family members and the grief that they're going through.
- [42:26]
A
I know what you're praying for. I'm saying, give me a sense of the mechanics of the whole thing. So you pray and then what happens next? What actually occurs because of your prayer?
- [42:41]
C
Well, that's impossible to know.
- [42:43]
A
If you have no idea at all, it's odd that you're even praying.
- [42:49]
C
Well, no, because we have faith that God hears our prayers and whatever we ask of him, he hears. So it's, you know, the words that we speak are effective.
- [43:02]
A
Effective meaning that if you didn't say them, he'd be less inclined to help out this person?
- [43:08]
C
No, That. The. That. That's. That's a good question.
- [43:18]
A
Mishke tell you what I think is happening.
- [43:21]
C
What do you think's happening?
- [43:23]
A
I think the part of God that is in all of us is reaching out toward this soul and that the very love within that prayer is having an effect. An effect we cannot see, but an effect that not only is there right then at that moment, but in every one of our loving thoughts, anytime during the day. That there is power simply in the expression of love.
- [43:50]
C
Well, that's a good way of putting it.
- [43:55]
A
Regardless, I like talking about these things. So anytime I find a deacon and there are a dime a dozen out there, let me tell you, if I had a nickel every time I was at a bar and some guy's being booted out, I said, you a deacon? Yeah, I'm a deacon. So, anyway, John, thank you for visiting with me.
- [44:10]
C
Thank you for calling. I appreciate it. You have a great day. I've been thinking a lot lately about unanswered prayer. But it's probably in the hands of the people involved. And the unanswered prayer is asking the wrong question.
- [44:21]
A
Maybe the unanswered prayer implies that there's someone you're speaking to and you're asking for something, and there's either a yes or no to that. I don't think that's how prayer works. I interviewed a guy recently, maybe you heard the show, the gentleman who had terminal cancer. And the only approach he used for healing, he was a scientist, which made it all the more fascinating. The only approach he used was prayer. And he went seeking it all over. Not only all over the country, but even outside the country. It was his only hope, and he wanted to really, as a scientist, understand it. And he talked to me on that show about what was effective prayer and not effective prayer. And it started to become clear to him that when there were large numbers of people who really were sure that what they were doing was going to work and that it was a power moving through them, it was far more effective that it couldn't just be a bunch of people praying. That by itself doesn't do it. So I interviewed that fella, and that was an interesting take on it. But I'll tell you something that happened to me one time. I have not talked about this on this show, but people who know my radio show may remember it. A woman called me with terminal cancer who had young kids. And at the time I was fascinated with different ideas. The notion that intention focused attention. Focused intention and focused attention by a large number of people on a single thing could have an effect. I don't know why during this time I was into this, but I was. And I thought if there ever were a time to try this, it's hearing about this young mother with this case of terminal cancer. And so I would ask everybody listening to me, everybody to in whatever way they would consider their version of prayer to be best applied, to apply it. Whether it's just intention, whether it's meditative focus, whether it's willing something, whether it's asking something of a larger power. However you interpret the idea of prayer in silence. We were simply going to all at the same time focus on this woman and her cancer. And we had dead air. Long, long stretches of dead air. And I was syndicated at the time in different Minnesota stations. And it really upset the other stations, really bothered them. In fact, they complained, you can't do this. You can't have these Long stretches of dead air, you know, six, seven, eight minutes. And I would do it again at a different time, a different day, and I'd do it again, and I'd do it again, and I would do it again. Ultimately, this woman's cancer went away. She didn't have cancer anymore. And she found me one day about a year later.
- [47:35]
C
Okay.
- [47:37]
A
It was at some function I was at. She came up to me and obviously she was very, very grateful for everybody having done this. And she had tears in her eyes and. And she was going to live and going to raise these children. I think it was a year or two later the cancer came back. I was in a different place in radio, had a different time slot. What I had done had gotten me in some trouble. And the days of long stretches of dead air were over. And I wasn't going to be able to do that again. And that was an awkward moment because whether or not there was any connection, whether it was coincidence or not, in this woman's eyes, I'm sure this played a role. She didn't have any other treatment, and I was not able to do it again. And she died. And I found myself thinking, I would have felt better if I had never done that in the first place. If I would have done what most people would do and say, we can't have long stretches of dead air. I don't own the station. It's not my station. We can't be doing this. Then I would have just been detached from the whole thing. But once I seemed to be a player in this and then was not being a player a couple years later, there was a sense of responsibility that I was not taking on, but I was no longer in a position to. It was very, very bizarre. I'll just say I think about it from time to time, still to this day, and it's been many years.
- [49:19]
C
You know, it's funny you say that, because I think when you make that decision, initially, you may not have gone through this in your head, but when you made that decision initially, you're putting yourself in. So now you can't undo it. And if there's an opportunity to do it again or continue it, it's sort of part of the deal.
- [49:39]
A
Think of what could have happened and didn't, but what easily could have was all of a sudden I'm inundated with people who want me to do the same thing for them. I just hadn't thought it through that far. And I'll tell you, when that woman did get better, when she was at one point cancer free. I was the happiest guy in the world. I was equally crushed a couple years later when the cancer returned. Well, I think we've covered all the bases here, Bill.
- [50:11]
C
I think so too. And I really appreciate you being persistent. It's been a pleasure talking to you, Tommy.
- [50:16]
A
You as well, Bill. And I'm hoping for nothing but wonderful news eventually involving your wife. Will you keep me posted on that?
- [50:24]
C
I will, yeah. Yeah. If nothing else, I've got your phone number. I'll text you. Text you with good news or bad
- [50:29]
A
news, please let me know. What's her first name?
- [50:32]
C
Her first name is Lisa.
- [50:33]
A
Lisa. I'm thinking good thoughts for this woman, and I'm hoping that my intuition is right. So keep me apprised.
- [50:41]
C
Appreciate it.
- [50:42]
A
So long.
- [50:42]
C
Thanks. So long.
- [50:49]
A
I've talked to you plenty about the Wellshire Memory Care Center. I've talked to you about the environment there. How it's designed to enhance residents independence, decrease their stress. How the resident rooms surround the household common space so that there are no long hallways. Hallways create anxiety about which way to go with people dealing with memory loss. Memory boxes outside residents rooms help residents find their rooms independently. There's access to secure courtyards, allowing residents to enjoy fresh air, sunshine, flowers. The community area allows for socialization. Coffee shops, activity rooms, ice cream parlor, cinema, chapel, even a bar. At the Wellshire, there's a sense of belonging. People are living, truly living in an environment built to celebrate life. Tour the Wellshire before deciding where to place your loved one. These are strange times. Let's try to be safe out there, folks. At one time in history, the Black Plague was the big worry. Today, it's your bathroom. In our bizarre time on this earth, both the bathroom and the Black Plague have wanted us dead. There are people out there longing for safety and security. And what they're doing to find it is odd. Bulletproof cars are becoming popular. I read this this week. Drivers are paying for additions to their vehicles that were once reserved for banks, for law enforcement, for the military. A fellow named Mark Burton is the founder and chief executive of Armor Max. That's a company that will come and make your car bulletproof. Their website says we turn regular vehicles into bulletproof machines. We serve government, we serve banks, we serve law enforcement. But here's my favorite part. We also serve plumber Joe. Plumber Joe driving on the freeway and in these crazy times, maybe having a stray bullet come his way. He needs to start thinking about taking care of his family. I'm serious about this, people. You can look this up, go to the website armormax. Surging interest in armored cars offers a window into American anxiety levels. These days the people who shop for these bulletproof cars are concerned about carjackings, smash and grab thefts and road rage, which have become more prevalent in recent years. They want a bulletproof car. I remember when they just wanted good gas mileage. You remember that? Now they pull in and say, you have any bulletproof minivans? I need a bulletproof minivan for my family. Bulletproof? Nope, nope. Oh, that's a shame because I have a family and we go camping up north and we wanted a bulletproof vehicle, preferably a minivan. Nope, nope, we don't have that. Uh huh. Okay. Well, barring that, might you have again, a minivan would be ideal. Might you have a vehicle with front mounted machine guns behind the turn signals and those tire shredding blades that extend from the wheel hubs? I also need that missile capability and adaptive camouflage if you have it. Sir, we don't offer any of that. Well, you're obviously not a family man then. I'm a family man. See, if I were a single guy, then I'd buy a convertible and I'd just take my chances. Kind of like the way Kennedy did in Dallas. You know, a lot of people say that was really about road rage. Assassination is a strong word and it deflects from the real issue. That was road rage. A lot of people say. I don't say that. No, no, no, no. I know it was Dick Nixon. I've known it was Richard Nixon for a long time. You won't read any books that say that, but I happen to know it for a fact. Dick Nixon was still sore about that debate, that TV debate with jfk. Yeah. Because people who heard that debate on radio instead of television thought Nixon won the debate. But on television Kennedy was so much better looking that people said Kennedy won the debate. Nixon on television had that five o' clock shadow. He just didn't look good. And it always pissed him off that Kennedy was so much better looking. And some people said you could hear that day in Dallas from the grassy knoll, someone screaming, you're not so good looking now, are ya? That was Dick Nixon. I think that's where he got the name Tricky Dick, because right afterward he was wearing a Dallas police officer's uniform as though he was looking for the killer. You know, he was the killer. It wasn't about road rage, although it could have been. It could have been because Kennedy's car was moving obnoxiously Slow through Dealey Plaza. Obnoxiously slow. If I were behind that car. I mean, on a hot day in Dallas, you're driving behind Kennedy. Come on, come on, come on. So they say even plumber Joe is getting a bulletproof car. Now plumber Joe, I assume by that they mean the average Joe. The average Joe. I don't know how he got the plumber gig. Used to be the average Joe. But plumber Joe is getting a bulletproof car now for his wife and kids. The average working class, middle class American, the everyman, getting a bulletproof car. Strange times. What happened to Joe Sixpack? Did plumber Joe replace Joe Sixpack? It used to be Joe Six Pack. That was your go to guy. When you wanted to talk about the average guy, how come we yanked Mr. Six Pack? I think the feeling was a dude hammering a six pack didn't feel the same today as years ago today. It was kind of like saying Joe Lush. Whereas years ago a six pack was nothing. As people drink less and less. Saying Joe's six pack sent the wrong message. So they yanked Joe Six Pack and they went with plumber Joe, who was before Joe Six Pack. Oh, I know Joe Blow. Remember when they used to say any old Joe Blow? I'm not just some Joe Blow, you know, some nobody. I'm so and so. They always used to say Joe Blow. I remember that. Why did they say Joe Blow? Well, you can bet old Tommy looked it up and it was a slightly more dismissive thing. Joe Blow, it turns out, was short for Joe Blowhard. I'm not kidding. You kind of feel it when you hear Joe Blow. That's not as flattering as plumber Joe. Hey, you over there, kind of an average Joe Blow, aren't you? What do you mean by that blow part? I'm plumber Joe. Yeah, sure you are. Some people think it also was from bloviating because there was Joe Bloviating at a bar. There's the blowhard at the bar. That's Joe Blow there. Your average guy at a bar in America holding court. You know those guys, people. You've been in the bars. You've seen them. Come on, we've all seen them. Joe Blow at the bar. He's got a few in him. Because he's also Joe Six Pack. He usually can be heard saying the government. That's what it is. You can't really make out anything else, but you keep hearing that. It's it. I tell you, it's the government. What's he saying over there? I don't know something about the government. The way things are today, you know, as opposed to when I was growing up. You're very different now, I'll tell you that. The government. The same people who say I can't smoke at my kids daycare. You know who gets the shaft in this country? Plumber Joe. John Doe. The common man. Middle America, Morty. The silent majority. Working class Joe. John Q.
- [60:03]
C
Public.
- [60:04]
A
The guy next door, that's who. Your soccer mom and your NASCAR dad? That's me. And another thing, I gotta get a bulletproof car.