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- [00:00]
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Truckers aren't just moving goods. They're making sure bakers get their chocolate chips and hotels get their tiny soaps. But truckers can't do this if they're not on the road. That's why Progressive has over 360 heavy truck employees to help truckers stay on time and on track. Quote Truck insurance today in as little as eight minutes at Progressive Commercial.com, progressive Casualty Insurance Company and affiliates, Garagelogic isn't just another podcast.
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It's a trusted voice with a loyal audience. Every day, listeners tune in and pay attention to the businesses we feature. When you advertise with garagelogic, you're putting your brand in front of people who listen and act. We're number one in Anguilla and we'll make your business number one with G Ellers. Here's what one of our clients had to say.
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Hey, it's Pete Arnold from Hire it Pro. And I've used garagelogic to promote my business for years. And I have seen great results and new clients for my services from the GL audience. I recommend it to any business looking for new customers. Glers are pretty awesome.
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A
You just gotta ask for an introduction.
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You just heard how garagelogic delivers results for our advertising partners. Now it's your turn. Reach our engaged audience of g allers and grow your business by contacting account executive mark ellis@mark.ellisbi.com that's mark.ellisbi.com Put your message where it belongs, right in the ears of listeners who trust garagelogic.
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My name is Shannon Maldonado.
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I'm the founder of Yaoi, a gift shop. From the lens of artists and handmade objects. I chose Shopify because when I was testing other platforms, it was definitely one of the most user friendly. It was important to me to think
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A
about where we would be in the future.
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All of the tools for reading your sales, like planning inventory, they're just right there on your dashboard. For anyone starting a small business, the biggest thing I can tell you, it doesn't have to be perfect. Shopify can help you build upon it. Start your free trial on shopify.com.
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A
this is what you call a big news day. Some days are a little bit more newsy than others. The news I'm reading is flat out smoking. O you. My name's Mishke. Hootie Hootie hu Breaking news. Hootie Hootie Huey. New word from the nation's top scientists. Slap my popo and call me Betty. Be advised, be advised. Breaking news, breaking news. It's no small Story. There's no two ways about it. This is big. Whether it's big in your household or not, whether you're talking about it around the dinner table, it's big. Scientists say they have built a cell. I repeat, scientists say they have built a cell from scratch for the very first time in human history. Put that in your pipe and torque on it, people. Human beings have built a cell from scratch. That's never before been done. Do you even know what a cell is? I mean, I know you know what a cell is, but I mean, do you know how hard it is to build one of these babies? Scientists say they have built a cell from scratch for the first time ever. A cell that can feed, that can grow, that can replicate like any normal cell. This breakthrough in synthetic biology could usher in a new era of made to order organisms that function like true living machines. Even the most basic cell, people is far more complex than any machine ever built by humans. I repeat, even the most basic, simplest cell is far, far more complex than any machine ever built in history by a human being. Run that through your noggin a couple of times, I'll wait. No, a single cell is not a little blob. It is not a little blob. It's an unimaginably busy microscopic city. It's a metropolis. A bustling, crazed metropolis. A cell contains trillions, I repeat, trillions of working parts. And we built one. You didn't. I mean, humans built one. What was the size of the headlines after VJ Day in 1945? We need that same size headline today, folks. A single human cell contains 42 million. That's 42 million protein molecules. They're working alongside billions. That's billions of other molecules all packed into a space too small to see without a microscope. Inside that little, little, little, little, little, little, little space, the cell runs hundreds of thousands of chemical reactions every single second. Building proteins, generating energy, moving materials, repairing damage, communicating with other cells all simultaneously and without any central controller directing the process. There is no central controller. This entire operation runs continuously and on its own. A single cell is a freaking miracle. A shockingly astounding world shaking. What on earth is going on here? Miracle. And we just done gone and built one. You didn't. Oh, if I could just get you inside a cell, shrink you down and get you in there. It's like a factory, a giant factory with no manager. A cell runs thousands of chemical reactions per second in the right order, the perfect order, with no central controller. It's like a factory floor where the Workers have no boss, but somehow are able to build a complex automobile every few seconds. It's all happening inside a cell. We built one of those. You didn't. Damn it. Every one of our lives begins as a single cell. Every one of us started that way. You were a cell. I was a cell. That's all we were. We were one cell. We were young. Oh, we were young. We were just a cell. A cell that contained the complete genetic blueprint for our entire makeup. Every organ, every physical trait, all of it. You and I were a cell once. I don't remember my view of life at that particular point, but my guess is I said to myself, I think things are going to start to get a little wild here pretty quickly. Hang on, cowboy. That's what I think I said to myself. Because from there, that one cell, that cell that you and I were, it divided. One cell became two cells, then four, then eight. Doubling repeatedly, doubling, doubling, doubling. Within about a week, a week after being just one cell, you and I were a cluster of cells. Well, I was a cluster of cells and you were a cluster. I'm sorry. What caused you to do that, Tom? I don't know. I do not know. We were a small cluster of cells. Now, by the time we were born, By the time we were born, at the point of birth, that single cell we had been had become 26 billion cells. That's what nine months will do to you now. As an introvert, I would have wanted to get out of there and get back to being just a single cell. But it was too late. Life was on the move. By adulthood. By adulthood, you and I were 37 trillion cells. 37 trillion cells. One cell already by itself was astonishingly complex, unfathomably complex. A microscopic city with trillions of working parts. One cell was that. And we were made up of trillions of them. And we're made up of trillions of them now. The overwhelming complexity of just being a human being is simply beyond our ability to ever grasp. We can only sit here in awe. As we contemplate it, that's all we can do, is sit in awe. We're not built to comprehend this fully. We just can sit slack jawed. But then to think that someone has now figured out how to make one of these babies, how to make a cell, build a cell, create a cell the way a carpenter creates a kitchen cabinet. We can now make a cell. You can't. A cell building proteins, generating energy, moving materials. 42 million protein molecules working alongside billions of other molecules packed into this tiny Tiny, tiny, tiny space running. Hundreds of thousands of chemical reactions every second. We made this thing. You made nothing. You made nothing. Remember in your life when you got pretty excited because you could make a decent paper airplane? I think we all remember that, right? I still remember that feeling. The feeling of making a decent paper airplane. One that looked good and flew even better. I was so proud, as I recall, watching that paper airplane sail off the roof of my house when I was a kid. I had made something that looked cool and moved in a cool manner. I had created it. And even though it doesn't sound very complex to me at the time, it seemed kind of complex. There were several folds that had to be made just so and you could screw it up, but I didn't. On this one occasion, I recall, I made it perfectly and it flew perfectly. Well, I think about making a cell. How do you feel after that? What do you do after that? Do you head out with the gang for drinks? I would think you would head out with the gang for drinks. I mean, what else would you do? Do you take off your tool belt, crack a beer and say, whoa? Not bad for a day's work, huh? Little pat on the back. All right, all right. Look, everybody, it's dividing right now. Look, it's becoming two cells. Look now four. Look at this. Come here. Come here. Look now eight. Now it's a cluster. It's a little cluster. Dear God, it's moving fast. Look at that thing. Look at that thing go. Dividing again. Growing. Look at that thing. Oh, boy. Wait a minute. Oh, is that a kid? Is that. Is that a kid? Wait a minute.
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C
What?
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A
Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. It's a toddler now. Hey, hey. What do we do to shut this thing down? Well, that's an adolescent. That there is an adolescent.
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B
Oh, God.
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A
What? It's an adult. It's an adult human being. Let's name him Adam. We shall name him Adam. Now let's make another guy. Yeah, yeah, guy. We'll name him Steve. Adam and Steve. Just to mess with the Bible thumpers. What else do you guys want to make? We're on a roll. How about we make a slingshot? I know that's far simpler, but I feel like making a slingshot. You guys wanna. We'll go into the woods, we'll get a stick, and I have an oversized rubber band. We'll make a slingshot. That ain't bad. We could do that. But after that, let's get back to the lab and make something cool like a grizzly. Bear. And then a new planet. It sure is fun being creative. Yes, it is. Anyone want to try making human intestines? We can do a prank on Kenny in hr. You guys in human intestines, raise your hand. Once you can make a cell and fly someone to the moon, you gotta be feeling pretty doggone good about yourself. In the years I was alive, we put a man on the moon and we made a human cell. You didn't. Okay, but I made a slingshot once. And a paper airplane. So you say you can fly someone to the moon and you can make a cell from scratch, but you can't keep your marriage together. What gives, Rick? Carlos down in maintenance, he's keeping his marriage together. No one gets very excited about Carlos, but the dude has six kids and he's still madly in love with Juanita, his wife. They're having a party this weekend with all their friends. Fun group to be around. Carlos is going to tell everyone at the party that someone at his workplace built a cell from scratch. An actual cell. They'll raise a glass and toast that achievement and get back to having fun with the kids. Now, Roscoe down in Kansas, he didn't build a cell. And frankly, he didn't hold a marriage together either. No. His great gift, if you scramble the letters of a five letter word, he'll tell you what that word is every time. Scramble the letters of any five letter word and he'll tell you what the original word was. He's very good at that. That and making paper airplanes in his cell with writing paper and sending them out between the bars there in Leavenworth. Flying over the railing of the cell block as Roscoe yells, escape attempt. Escape attempt. That's what Roscoe does with his days. Sends those paper airplanes out over the rail of the cell block. He knows it's the closest he'll come to escape and the closest he'll come to creativity. But all the other people on the cell block love to see his little airplane leave his cell and go out into the air above the guards flying free. No. His family fell apart, his marriage fell apart, his career fell apart. He didn't do as much as he wanted to with this life. He messed up badly, obviously ended up in Leavenworth. But I'm telling you, at the cafeteria, guys are constantly scrambling the letters of these five letter words, and Roscoe just nails it every time. You show me a human being, I'll show you a gift. We all have something, right? No, I did not build a cell. No, I did not put a man on the moon. Yes. I live vicariously through many of the achievements of my brethren and my dear sisters out there. The great things they do. I like to take a little tiny snippet of credit for being made of the same substance they are. More or less. I like to think that if so and so can put a man on the moon, I could too. I just chose to direct my energies in different ways. Yes, I could have built a cell. I didn't do it. I didn't see the point. I was building a towel rack. A towel rack. Okay. No, I will not be getting a Nobel Prize, but I'm not going for that one. I'm going for the Carlos Award for marital bliss and good times. On the weekend, Somewhere in a dimension adjacent to ours, a raccoon is filing a personal injury claim against gravity itself. Gravity has hired representation. This is not that particular dimension. This is a place called Minnesota. And in Minnesota, when a Buick reverses through a Perkins at 11:15 on a Wednesday and clips your kneecap, you ask one question. What's the contact number again for Bradshaw and Bryant? In another dimension, they might have depositioned a vending machine cross examined a goose. We're here in Minnesota and you got hurt and the universe owes you something. Money. Closure. Probably both Bradshaw and Bryant will go to bat for you. They don't want a dime until they win you some money. There's not a better deal going. Your kneecap's going to hurt for a while, but your head and your heart are going to feel real good soon. Go to Minnesota. Personal injury.com the United States just turned 250 years old. And right here in the Twin Cities, a local company is celebrating a birthday of its own. 108 years MSP. Minneapolis St. Paul plumbing, heating, air and electric is 108. Since 1918, MSP has kept Minnesota families warm, or kept them cool, but certainly kept them comfortable. I mean through world wars, through record breaking heat waves, through brutal winters, and everything in between. This month, to celebrate the birthday of the United States and their own 108 years of being around, MSP is putting together 250 and 108 and coming up with 358 and taking 358 bucks off any new heating or cool cooling equipment. If your air conditioner has been struggling, you've been thinking it might be time for something new. This is a great moment to take advantage of a great deal. Go to callmsp.com schedule your appointment, claim your $358 in savings. I have to make a call and it's all because of that sound right there. I was driving through Wisconsin and I needed an item for my automobile and needed to stop at a hardware store. And I found a hardware store, and I went down a couple aisles and I found the item I needed for my automobile. But below that and a few feet over, were some parakeets. And right next to them, not too far away from an item you can buy to help repair your tire if you get a flat, there was a ferret. These creatures were for sale. I've been to a lot of hardware stores. I tend to see a theme when I go to a hardware store. There's a definite theme in the items they sell. We left that theme the moment I came across the parakeets and that furry little ferret. They were right down at the bottom in two cages next to each other, mixed in with all the typical hardware stuff. What, did they just decide to throw that in? They did some market research that said it would make sense to toss in parakeets and ferrets in their automotive section. I made a comment on the way out and the lady said to me, did you see the lizards?
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B
What?
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A
What's going on here? When curve balls like that are thrown, I know I'm not dealing with a national chain operation. This must be a ma and Pa operation. Pa had a dream one night that his hardware store should also throw in parakeets, lizards, and a couple of ferret. I took down the number. I figured I'd give him a call, so I'm going to give him a call.
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C
Good afternoon. How can I help you?
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A
Hi there. I need to get some PVC pipe and some silicone sealant, plus some spooled copper wire and some electrical tape and a flush valve kit.
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C
One moment.
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A
Wait a minute. I'm not done yet. Yes, I'm also needing several live ferrets and a number of parakeets. Do you have those as well?
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C
One moment, please. Hi.
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Hi. I was stopping by to get some PVC pipe and some silicone sealant and some schooled copper wire and a flush valve kit, and I realized I also need to get a hold of a few ferrets and a number of parakeets. You guys have that?
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C
We have some parakeets.
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A
I need ferrets, too.
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C
We have one, but he's not available yet.
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A
When will he be?
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C
Tomorrow, maybe not for a while.
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A
How about lizards?
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C
We do have a variety of lizards.
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A
Yes, lizards and parakeets. That'd be great. The PVC and copper wire. My wife is probably going to Expect. But the rest of this is going to be a surprise. She's coming home from a business trip overseas and I want to surprise her when she walks into the bedroom. So we're gonna have some fun. I'll be stopping by in about an hour. Parakeets and lizards. You say we're covered there?
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C
Yes.
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Hot damn. I'll buy whatever you have. All right, I'll tell you something. Between you, me and the fence post, those little creatures are so darn cute. All my friends have the stuffed versions in their bedrooms. I want the real deal. I want a lively bedroom with a wondrous living cacophony of sound and fury all around the pillows. You know what I'm saying? Whether my wife does remains to be seen. But she has to be sick of being welcomed home by me and my Nixon mask and the tutu.
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C
Yes.
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A
All right then. See you soon.
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C
Have a good day.
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A
That's good old America right there. That's good old white picket fence. Ma and Pa America right there. That's what you have there. Speaking of white picket fences, I just read the other day that they're going away. America is 250 years old and we're saying goodbye to the white picket fence. People don't want them anymore. They were decorative, they were pretty, they were iconic. But they weren't private enough. Not private enough for the new America. People who are nudists, people who want to smoke a little pot in their backyard, they want to hide. They don't want the neighbors looking in. Privacy fences are the big deal now. No little gaps in between for people to look through. Used to be a time America wanted a white picket fence. That's how they were going to talk to their neighbor across the way, across the white picket fence. That represented part of the American dream. I think the American dream now involves barbed wire at the top. Keep what you want in in. Keep what you want out out. People want stronger fences, higher fences, synthetic fences that don't need as much work done to them. The white picket fence at one time in America represented middle class life. Talk to fence companies. Hardly anyone wants them anymore. Almost no one wants a white picket fence. The American fence company out there has been around since the late 40s. They can't remember the last time a customer walked in and said, you have any white picket fences? You know what still is popular, however, and has been going back to the early 20th century? The chain link fence. The chain link fence remains very popular. The ugliest fence ever made. Half of all fences sold in America are chain link fences. Here's the entertaining thing I learned about the American Fence Company. It was started in 1948. You know who started the American Fence Company? You're not going to know this fella. His name is JP van den Berg. But let me tell you a little something about J.P. van Denburgh. In 1948 he started the company. But in 1945 he was behind a fence in Germany. A fence for a POW camp. Now I wouldn't assume a guy who had been fenced in in a POW camp would come home and get all excited about devoting his life to fences. But that's what old JP did with the rest of his life. Sold fences much like the fences used to keep him where he was in Germany. JP Vandenberg started the American Fence Company three years after leaving his own fenced in world there in Germany. The American Fence Company grew to be one of the largest, most respected fence companies in the United States. It is still going strong. JP came home from the war a 22 year old kid trying to figure out what to do with the rest of his life. JP's pop said to him when he got back to the farm after the war, what are you going to do with your life, son? JP said, well, dad, that time as a POW sure impressed me. I tried to escape several times, but just walked straight into a fence. I'd run south, I'd hit a fence, I'd run north, smash into a fence, run east, bust my nose slamming into a fence, head west, bounce right off a fence. It was extraordinary, Dad. I couldn't get out of there. And I learned later on that the Nazis had fences at all their POW camps. Those fences can really do the job. And I had a lot of time to think there in my bunk. I said to myself one day, this fence thing is where it's at. I mean, that's how you make things secure. Whether you want to keep people out of a junkyard, out of a rail yard or out of your backyard. You know what I'm saying, dad? When I was in that POW camp, I said to the commandant one day, fella, did you ever try running one of these POW joints without the fence just to save on costs? Well, he told me they tried it and it was a disaster. A disaster, dad. He said, the fence is the ticket to any successful POW camp. Now there was a little nugget of wisdom I told myself to hang on to. The fence is the ticket to any successful POW camp. That philosophy can be transferred to all sorts of things in civilian life. Keeping dogs where you want to keep them. Keeping out people you don't want in a certain area. I mean, this whole POW thing, hard as it was for me, it was a wake up call to the power of the fence. I remember giving that commandant a big old hug that day, thanking him profusely, and I'll tell you, he was none too happy about that. Sent me to the cooler for 30 days. But regardless, I woke up to my life's calling right then and there. Pop, I remember when that commandant was hanged at Nuremberg, I, I was there saying to him, sorry, you gotta go, but thanks again for all the insights. And remember to tip the hangman. You do that and he'll place the knot in such a way that it'll be over real quick for you. Well, as a tip, the commandant said to the hangman, get into the fence business. No, the hangman wasn't looking for that kind of a tip. He had wanted cash. Oh God. The hangman then ended up making it. So the commandant died slowly and painfully. Kinda sad. Alright, time to make a listener call. There's a gentleman who has been waiting a long time. And the reason he's been waiting a long time is I mistakenly checked off his name as having already spoken with him when I have not spoken with him. He got on the list in February of 2025. Recently, recently he contacted me saying, still hanging in there, waiting for my call. And I looked and I thought, dear God, I've checked that man off the list. As if we've spoken already. And we have not spoken because lately I've been calling people who haven't been on the list very long at all. So I'm doubling back to this gentleman who gets the record for the longest wait. My bad. By the way, if you'd like to be on the listener list, keep this number handy. 651-321-8949. Text me, let me know you want to be called 651-321-8949. You can also use that number for getting in touch with the show. Text me with anything on your mind and you can email the show. Mishkebardradio.com mishkiubbardradio.com or 651-321-8949. Let's call James.
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C
Hello.
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A
Well, hello there, James.
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C
Mr. Mischie, how are you?
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A
I'm well. And how about you?
- [31:29]
C
Well, right now I'm fine. I just got done loading a bunch of hay in this wonderful heat.
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A
Loading hay. What year is it? I feel like it's 1936. I have a sense the rest of my life I'll never talk to anybody again who tells me, well, it's just getting done, loading some hay.
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C
You might not, but there's still some of us with horses that need small squares and there's no way to handle them other than unload them off the wagon and put them away in your barn.
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A
You ever been involved in a farm accident?
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C
No, thankfully not.
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A
Anybody in the family ever been thrown by a horse?
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C
No. Finding some wood to knock on? That hasn't happened yet, but it happens to plenty of others. But we've got some pretty good horses, so hopefully that doesn't happen.
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A
You know what I hear, and this is from the experts? In a lifetime, a horse will eventually throw you.
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C
Oh, I'm sure I. As good as these horses are, I'm very cautious. You know, I give them a healthy amount of respect. I'm not 25 years old like those rodeo guys. I'm. I'm pretty close to your age and I've got six year old twins that I need to take care of. So doing things too risky isn't in my game plan.
- [32:53]
A
How the heck can you be my age and have six year old twins?
- [32:59]
C
Well, on my second marriage, my wife didn't have kids and she kept asking me if I wanted kids and I said I didn't because I had three grown children at that point and she caught me at a weak moment. The next thing I knew, the nurse was telling us, we've got twins coming. Yeah.
- [33:25]
A
Oh, God, that's so delightful.
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C
It is. But you know, as scary as it was almost seven years ago when I heard that, I'm very blessed. It's been. Well, of course I'm very fortunate.
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A
It always works that way. If it would have been quintuplets, you would have been blessed. Of course, that's the way it is when you start to actually get to know these creatures. Then after a while you say you can't imagine life without them, but, oh, if I'd have only been able to pay for a ticket to be there. When they said twins, your wife must have had a belly laugh.
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C
I don't think she was laughing much either. We were both pretty shocked. We were both plenty shocked. My wife's not that much younger than me, so you know, to have kids at her age and have them both be.
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A
Well, how old was she when they were born?
- [34:20]
C
She was still 50 years old and turned 51 a few weeks later.
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A
You have got to be kidding me. Your wife had twins just shy of 51?
- [34:31]
C
Yep. Yep.
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A
Caught you at a weak moment. Why were you guys thinking you could get pregnant at all?
- [34:38]
C
Well, thought that there was a chance, so we, we. We tried and yeah, next thing I knew.
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A
Does your wife know one other woman even close to her age who had a child?
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C
I had an aunt who was 42.
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A
That's nothing. My wife gave birth to our Last one at 43. That's not surprising me. It's the 51 that's surprising me.
- [35:07]
C
Yes, yes, that's true. I get a few. Oh, what's your grandson or granddaughter's name? Or how old are your. Are your grandkids.
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A
How old are your kids from the first marriage?
- [35:22]
C
36, 34 and 29.
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A
And you have grandkids?
- [35:27]
C
Two grandkids, yep. A grandson that's a year older than my twins and a granddaughter that's a year younger. My twins have a nephew that's a year older than they are.
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A
Where'd you grow up?
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C
I grew up on the east side, St. Paul.
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A
The rockin east side of St. Paul.
- [35:47]
C
That's right. And then a little bit in Wisconsin, moving with my dad's job, and then Stillwater Bay, Port Oak Park Heights areas.
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A
What was the most unusual thing that happened to you growing up?
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C
Well, I was in high school, maybe my junior or senior year. I lived on a small lake on the north side of Stillwater, and that lake is now referred to by those that are old enough, referred to as Torso Bay. The young woman that was unfortunately murdered by, I think, a bouncer at a bar. Was it? Mt Pockets beheaded the young lady, and that went into a pond somewhere off of Highway 96. And the torso was found on the lake that I grew up on.
- [36:43]
A
Found by whom?
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C
Someone walking a dog. It was on the other side of this small lake. Someone dog walking found it.
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A
You know, if I could get. If I could get to the end of my life without finding a torso, I'd be a happy man.
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C
Yes, yes. I just recall the day before, riding around on that side of the lake, probably within 10 to 20ft of where they found that portion of the body. Fortunate that I didn't notice it and have to be the one to find it.
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A
And they then went and nicknamed it Torso Bay.
- [37:20]
C
Torso Bay. Yep.
- [37:25]
A
Oh, God. How long have you listened to the program?
- [37:31]
C
I. Unlike so many other people you talk to that talk about, you know, your roadshow and radio days, I have only recently started listening, so I'm not as familiar. But, you know, I love hearing the stories about your past and the road shows and the different things that you've done. So I just really enjoy just listening to your history. You've had a very interesting history. So much different. The way your brain works and the way my brain works.
- [38:04]
A
I find myself wondering how many people think that. I wonder how many people think, boy, that fellow's brain is operating in a way that's a little different from the way the machinery works in my mind. But you've been on the listener list since the very beginning. Since the start of my show. I mistakenly checked you off as somebody I had talked to when in fact, we had never spoken. Consequently, you have the record for waiting the longest for your call. Somehow I mistakenly put a check mark saying you and I had. Had talked. And what I have tried to do with a listener list, get to everyone once before I go to people a second time. So I'm grateful to you for your patience. I want to thank you for being on the list and for being patient. And I hope that your twins, by the way, were they fraternal or identical twins?
- [39:03]
C
Fraternal. It's a boy and a girl.
- [39:04]
A
Okay. Fraternal twins.
- [39:06]
C
Yep.
- [39:07]
A
How long before they were born did you get the word that it was going to be twins?
- [39:12]
C
It was less than three months along.
- [39:15]
A
Can you take me to that room where they let you know this?
- [39:19]
C
It was a pretty typical doctor's examination room that had a ultrasound in it. And so the nurse that was doing the ultrasound, it wasn't the doctor, it was the nurse that was doing the ultrasound. Remember her saying, okay, here's baby number one, a boy. And I thought she just was saying a number one, you know, number one boy. And then she continued to say, and here's baby number two, a little girl.
- [39:54]
A
Do you actually remember what you thought at that moment?
- [39:59]
C
Oh, my God, what are we going to do with twins? You know, I had three older children, so I knew what it was like having one at a time every couple of years. But there were probably a million things running through my head. 55 years old and having twins, and
- [40:18]
A
you looked over at your wife.
- [40:20]
C
I imagine she had a pretty blank look on her face, but I could tell she was excited when she heard that there was a little girl. She really wanted a little girl, but pretty shocked about, oh, my gosh, we're gonna have twins. So for her not having a family 50 years old, she got her instant family for sure.
- [40:42]
A
Not only did she get you in a moment of weakness, but kaboom.
- [40:47]
C
Family, yes. Instant family.
- [40:50]
A
Well, you're a lucky man. Getting to raise a couple of kids. The thing you probably realized after your other kids had grown up was just how thrilling that period is in a person's life. As hard as it is, as difficult as it is, nothing beats it. And that you got to go back to it. That's quite a win.
- [41:10]
C
Yes. Yes, it certainly is. And it's certainly been much different the second time around than it was with the first three. But all very good.
- [41:18]
A
And when you say much different, do you mean better?
- [41:21]
C
Many ways better. But in some ways, maybe not so much. You know, not being as young and able to get up enough off the floor and do a lot of the more physical things is a little more difficult to do this time around. But then again, this time around, the stresses of finance and things like that, that come when you're very young having kids, that isn't there this time. So different stresses, different, different obstacles, but in both cases, all very good.
- [41:56]
A
Well, I delighted in hearing that story and I delighted in our call. So thank you so much for spending this time with me, James. I wish you all the best. I hope to talk to you again sometime.
- [42:07]
C
All right, same to you. Good luck.
- [42:09]
A
So long. On most mornings at the well Shire, Ruth asks where Harold is. Harold was her husband. They were married 53 years. He passed away eight years ago. Ruth knows this on some days, but other days she does not. And on those days, a caregiver named Patricia doesn't remind her Harold has passed away, doesn't take her back to a grief she's already lived through. Instead, Patricia sits down next to her and says, harold's running a little late today. Tell me about him while we wait. And Ruth does. She talks about how Harold fixed the porch swing, how he sang off key at church, how he brought her coffee every morning. For a few minutes there, Harold wasn't gone, just late. And Ruth, she got to love him out loud. That's not a trick. That's a caregiver who understood that comfort matters deeply when one has Alzheimer's or dementia. At the Wellshire Memory Care center, they don't just manage memory loss. They meet people where they are. With heart, soul, patience, care, love. The Wellshire Memory Care center of Bloomington and Medina.
- [43:37]
B
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- [44:43]
A
I don't think I've spent any time at all on this program talking about Jeffrey Epstein. So it's surprising perhaps that the only time his name's going that the only time his name's going to come up is when I talk about his sperm. No, I don't want to talk about the man himself, but I would like to talk just briefly, just briefly about his sperm. That's part of Jeffrey Epstein. That is a part of the man. And that part is missing. Missing parts of bodies intrigued me. I remember being quite stunned the first time I read a headline saying president John F. Kennedy's brain was missing. And it remains missing to this day, folks, it's almost impossible to believe, but it's just a fact. There used to be a brain in some medical facility long after JFK was assassinated. They had his brain, and then somehow nobody knows how the brain went missing. It's just missing. You know where the brain is, Robin. I do not. It was here earlier, huh? That's the kind of talk that you could have found in discussions of John f. Kennedy's brain had you been there. You could have heard. Wait a minute. You can find it. No, Denise, I cannot. It was over here a week ago. No, not there. It was. Yeah, under there. It was there a week ago. Well, it's not there now. I don't know what happened. It's just hard to believe there's that kind of talk about an American president's brain. Jeffrey Epstein's sperm is kind of in that category now. They can't find it. They don't know what happened to it. It was there and, well, it's gone now. Here's the report.
- [46:47]
B
Jeffrey Epstein's sperm has become the center of a legal mystery. Newly released justice department records show that Epstein put plans in place for his estate to decide what would happen to it if he passed. The sperm was once Stored at California Cryobank. But the company says that it no longer has any samples associated with Epstein, and no one seems to know where the samples are.
- [47:09]
A
Now. Have they looked around at his house? Maybe like taking money out of the bank and bringing it home. He took the sperm out of the sperm bank and just brought it home. Have they looked around there? Mean, did anybody bother after he died to really go poking around? It's little, it's very small. It's hard to spot what's in the back room there. Back here, let's see. We got some door hinges. There's a stack of new paper towel rolls, some clothespins, bug spray, couple of folded up lawn chairs. Did I mention Jeff Epstein sperm? We have that here. What are we doing with this stuff? I don't know. We're supposed to have a yard sale, I think, get rid of what we can. Well, what are we going to do with the sperm? Sell it, I guess. Well, I don't know that we have to sell it. You know how a lot of yard sales feature a cardboard box with a free sign on it and they throw things in there. That's the free stuff. Maybe we could toss it in there with that plastic cup that has the Marvel comic thing on the side and that old broken clock radio. Just throw it in there. The day of the big sale, some older lady perusing everything says, what's this? What do you got there? Hold it up, I can't see it. Oh, that's. That's Jeffrey Epstein's sperm. Wha. What can you do with it? Supposedly make a really weird, creepy baby. If you're into that sort of thing, you'll need an egg. You can inject that directly into the center of the egg and you get a kid started, I guess. Well, what about the clock radio? Well, that's free as well. Yeah, but what do you do with it? Well, if you want to listen to a radio and look at a clock at the same time, it makes it possible to do that. You'll need to plug it in. Do I need an egg? No, no, no, no. All right, well, I'm going to take the clock radio. Oh, okay. Hey, we got a special going. Take the clock radio and we throw in the sperm for free. I thought everything in the box was free. Oh, yeah, yeah, that's right. Forget it. Does the sperm do anything if you don't have an egg? No, no, not really. It could be a doorstop, I guess, but your door would have to be really, really small. Okay, I'm taking the clock radio. All right. Jeffrey Epstein's sperm is with John Kennedy's brain. They're on some tropical island off the west coast of Bahrain. They met each other in some dive bar, got affectionate, things went too far and they eloped under Middle Eastern stars. Yes, Jeffrey Epstein's sperm is with John Kennedy's brain. Jeff says I'm no Marylin, but Jack, please don't complain. What else do you have for prospects? A brain by itself can't have sex. Let's talk about the 2028 campaign together on a ticket the White House will regain. Though as a sperm, I realize I sound quite ins. Well, that's going to do it for this show, folks. Thanks so much for listening. Happy birthday, America. I've seen you looking better, but happy birthday just the same. Here's hoping you get to feeling more like yourself soon. God knows we love you. We wish the best for you. Blow out those candles and make a wish. We're all wishing nothing but the best for you. You have so much to offer. Once you're back on your feet, Godspeed.