28 Minutes of Unhinged Relationship TikToks With Dr. John Delony

Summary

Podcast Summary: "28 Minutes of Unhinged Relationship TikToks With Dr. John Delony"

George Kamel (Ramsey Network) | April 3, 2026 | Guest: Dr. John Delony | Duration: ~28 minutes

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Episode Overview

This lighthearted episode features George Kamel and Dr. John Delony humorously reacting to various viral relationship-themed TikToks, with a particular focus on how couples navigate finances, intimacy, and everyday quirks. Intertwining snark, pop culture, and genuine relationship advice, the duo offer both comedic commentary and insightful reflections, aiming to debunk myths and encourage healthier communication in relationships—especially concerning money.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Bedtime Habits & Relationship Space

• TikTok React: Struggles over bed space between couples.
• Discussion:
  • Dr. John Delony: "Here's what this dude could do: like, move over." [02:22]
  • Scandinavian Sleep Method is introduced (couples with separate blankets). Both hosts poke fun at giving such a simple concept a fancy name.
  • Dr. Delony's advice: "When you get into bed, do your best to be comfortable and to help your spouse also be comfortable." [03:20]
  • Emphasis on clear, vulnerable communication: "Ask your wife, 'Hey, can we cuddle?'" [03:47]

2. Musical Money Arguments

• TikTok React: A husband sings (in boyband style) to his wife about her overspending.
• Discussion:
  • George: "That guy's got pipes...don't put him against me on karaoke night. It's over." [06:01]
  • Both hosts point out this is a "sketch," but note the reality that passive-aggressive tactics rarely change behavior.
  • Dr. Delony: "This is a husband who is low key, frustrated with his wife's spending habits and has horrific communication and conflict style while having a wonderful singing voice. Which poses a problem." [06:34]

3. The Tales We Tell Ourselves in Marriage

• TikTok React: A wife imagines her husband purposely leaving towels and making a mess.
• Discussion:
  • Both agree couples often make up stories about their partner's intentions, which rarely reflect reality.
  • Dr. Delony: "I think the stories we make up about why our spouses do what they do ... I think those stories are almost all of the problem." [08:31]
  • Solution? Direct conversation: "Don't make up stories about your spouse. Just ask him." [09:03]

4. Social Media Declarations & Presence

• TikTok React: Someone dramatically announces a departure from social media.
• Discussion:
  • The hosts find humor in performative online exits.
  • Dr. Delony: "We've entered this weird matrix where we view ourselves through the eyes of everyone else...everything's a performance." [11:54]
  • The value of presence and authenticity is explored: "If you are watching your daughter...and you start to think, 'I want someone else to see this,' part of you is gone now." [13:07]

5. Making Adult Male Friendships

• TikTok React: Two dads struggle to bond at the park while their kids play.
• Discussion:
  • Both relate to the challenge of adult friendships, especially for fathers.
  • Dr. Delony: "I'm gonna go to the park and be with my kid...don't use your child to try to double dip on this deal." [16:33]
  • Building friendships is about shared hobbies, not forced small talk.

6. Intimacy Signals & the "Mental Load"

• TikTok React: A man hilariously misreads his wife's signals about intimacy.
• Discussion:
  • George, laughing: "She's clearly in a state of...not romance." [19:22]
  • Introduces concepts like "chore play" and highlights the difference in each partner's mental load.
  • Dr. Delony: Shares personal anecdotes about household roles and stresses: "Both people in a marriage generally are carrying some sort of mental load." [21:01]
  • Advice: "Put all that stuff on the table and give your spouse, your partner, like, the opportunity to carry some of that with you...instead of just holding it all inside and then being resentful." [23:38]

7. The Absurdity of Certain Social Media Trends

• TikTok React: Abstract performance art, with a drummer making out with a snare drum.
• Discussion:
  • Both hosts express amused confusion.
  • Dr. Delony: "There's really nothing about this that makes sense...social media decontextualizes everything." [25:57]
  • George: "My first thought was: I could be a drummer. Like, if this is what it takes..." [27:06]
  • The conversation ends with playful reminiscing about real concerts and the importance of experiencing things first-hand.

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Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• On Respect and Communication:

  • Dr. John Delony: "Intimacy is not: ‘I'm going to satisfy myself at your expense.’ Intimacy is: I know you so well that I can say what I want and put it on the table, and you can, too. And we can figure out a way to meet in the middle." [04:23]

• On the Stories We Tell:

  • Dr. John Delony: "I think the stories we make up about why our spouses do what they do...I think those stories are almost all of the problem." [08:31]

• On Performative Social Media Behavior:

  • Dr. John Delony: "We've entered this weird matrix where we view ourselves through the eyes of everyone else...everything's a performance." [11:54]

• On the Mental Load in Relationships:

  • Dr. John Delony: "Both people in a marriage generally are carrying some sort of mental load..." [21:01]

• Comedy Highlight:

  • George (on the snare drum performance): "My first thought was: I could be a drummer. Like, if this is what it takes." [27:06]
  • Dr. Delony: "I would pay money to see you kiss a snare drum." [27:10]

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Timestamps for Key Segments

• Bedtime Intimacy & Communication: 01:02–04:35
• Musical Money Fights: 05:17–07:34
• Making Up Stories About Spouses: 08:11–09:22
• Announcing Leaving Social Media: 10:57–13:20
• Dads Attempting Friendship at the Park: 15:01–16:33
• Misreading Intimacy Signals & Chore Play: 18:35–24:15
• Absurd TikToks (Drummer Performance): 25:08–27:10

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Tone & Style

• Language: Playful, snarky, candid, relatable.
• Approach: Equal parts humor and practical wisdom. Willingness to poke fun at both social media trends and themselves, while offering tangible relationship advice.

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Final Thoughts

This episode is a blend of marriage advice, humor, pop culture, and internet commentary, with George and Dr. Delony using unhinged TikToks as a mirror for real relationship and communication issues many couples face. Their dynamic brings levity to serious topics, while still landing on practical strategies: be present, communicate directly, share the mental load, and don’t let silly stories sabotage your connection.

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For Listeners

If you want a mix of laughter, actionable advice, and a glimpse at viral couple moments through the eyes of two real-talk experts, this episode is well worth your half-hour.

Transcript

[George]

Some things in life are inseparable. Peanut butter and jelly. Santa Claus and cookies. Jelly roll and Christian conservatives. By the way, bro, hit me up if you want to collab another entry on that list. Money and relationships. And today I'll be reacting to a cavalcade of tiktoks featuring couples dealing with their finances and other potential conflicts without committing a felony. And I won't be alone in this endeavor because I will be joined by everyone's favorite full time relationship expert and part stand up comedian, Dr. John DeLoney. He's the host of the Dr. John DeLoney Show, a bestselling author, a fellow Ramsey personality. Oh, and let me give a quick fist bump to delete me for sponsoring the channel. My guy, John, welcome. Thanks for being here.

[Dr. John DeLoney]

Thanks for inviting me to watch other people on the Internet and comment on them.

[George]

So the goal is to not make it weird and have fun.

[Dr. John DeLoney]

I've been told that I make things weird.

[George]

We're gonna do the opposite of that today. You ready?

[Dr. John DeLoney]

Are we?

[Child]

Okay.

[George]

Okay.

[Child]

Boop.

[Dr. John DeLoney]

You got me on the edge of the bed.

[George]

Now I'm over here looking at carpet. Can you slide over a piece? Hey, I ain't got no room over here either. You ain't got no room, boo. No. Have you. Has this ever been you and Sheila?

[Dr. John DeLoney]

No, I don't.

[George]

Are you a king bed kind of guy?

[Dr. John DeLoney]

Yeah, we are. Sleep on the other side of the world kind of people. Oh, there needs to be a good seven to eight feet between us.

[George]

Do you do the leg test where you swing your leg all the way around to make sure that.

[Dr. John DeLoney]

Negative.

[George]

Okay.

[Dr. John DeLoney]

We just know is that y'. All. There's no way that he gets that close to you.

[George]

I've made an attempt.

[Dr. John DeLoney]

There's like six dogs between them now. There's a wheelchair and a pony. There's all kind of stuff between y' all two.

[George]

Well, okay, so Olive sleeps in between us at the, like, the head right next to us. So she is this natural barrier of protection and warmth.

[Dr. John DeLoney]

That's why we're doing react videos.

[George]

This is really for John to help me. It's the only way I can book an hour with him. Well, you talk a lot about couples that are. They're 2 inches away but 100 miles apart. Yes, Especially because they're on their phones. I feel like this guy's doing it right. He's making the attempt. Where did he go wrong?

[Dr. John DeLoney]

Okay, so this is a perfect example of how simple marriage is, but how complicated we try to make it. Cause here's what this dude could do, like, move over.

[Commentator]

What a quaint concept.

[George]

Give her some space.

[Dr. John DeLoney]

Ta da. Right?

[George]

Yeah.

[Dr. John DeLoney]

And, like, I've walked into my house before, and there's, like, a pile of towels, right? And I'm like, what are these towels? Trying to. I could just pick up the towels. I could just pick them up and then go on about my life, Right? This guy could be like, oh, I'm about to shove my wife onto the floor. Maybe I could just roll over a few inches. Yeah, but this is a. This is a big victory for him. Congratulations.

[George]

Well, I'd just like to know what the consensus is in the comment section. Husband and I just started the Scandinavian sleep method, and let me tell you, it's the best thing ever. I don't have to fight to be warm anymore. Do you know about this?

[Dr. John DeLoney]

No, no. I'm from Texas.

[George]

Google's Scandinavian sleep method. I don't know how to type this. Couples using separate blankets or duvets while sharing a bed, allowing each person to customize their sleep experience. How did our ancestors survive without the Scandinavian.

[Dr. John DeLoney]

As species were doomed because we had to name it a method.

[George]

I love it. It's not a method, but when you put Scandinavian, it feels smart.

[Dr. John DeLoney]

Listen, when you get into bed, do your best to be comfortable and to help your spouse also be comfortable.

[George]

Yeah.

[Dr. John DeLoney]

Ta da. Ta da. That's a year's worth of marriage therapy right there.

[Child]

Free of charge.

[Dr. John DeLoney]

But here's a good thing. Can we. Can we cuddle for a bit?

[George]

Are you asking me?

[Dr. John DeLoney]

No.

[George]

Oh, sorry. I got. I mean, I don't think now is the time.

[Dr. John DeLoney]

So instead of just assuming she likes this.

[George]

Okay. Just kind of like, ask, Ask.

[Dr. John DeLoney]

Hey. And this is. This is. Everybody hates this word on the Internet. This is vulnerable to Ask your wife. Hey, can we cuddle?

[George]

Permission to touch.

[Dr. John DeLoney]

You made that super weird. But, like, hey, can we cuddle? Or I need a hug. I would love a hug right now.

[George]

Yeah.

[Dr. John DeLoney]

And she can go, no, I don't want to touch you. Well, then if that's the case, y' all need to have that conversation. Yeah, but you just using your enormous facial hair and gird muscles. He's a big dude.

[George]

Yeah.

[Dr. John DeLoney]

It should be like, right?

[George]

Yeah.

[Dr. John DeLoney]

And there's some women who would love that. And that's cool. Have that conversation.

[George]

So it's really about your style.

[Dr. John DeLoney]

Intimacy is not. I'm going to satisfy myself at your expense. Intimacy is. I know you so well that I can say what I want and put it on the table, and you can, too. And we can figure Out a way to meet in the middle.

[George]

That's beautiful. All right, we psychoanalyze that one. Next.

[Actor]

Why are you shopping? We have no money. That dress. Yeah, it's pretty. Please put that credit card away. Tell me why. Cause we cannot afford it. Can I try? Do you really think it's worth it? One last time. That's what you told me yesterday. Now put that credit card away.

[George]

Oh, into the bridge modulation. Forget the sphere. I got this guy.

[Dr. John DeLoney]

I have a feeling this is exactly like your home. I feel like when you have a hard conversation with Whitney, you get out of karaoke machine and you don't make eye contact and you sing it like parallel. I mean, perpendicular to her.

[George]

She wouldn't be in the same room as me at this point.

[Dr. John DeLoney]

That's right.

[George]

It should be gone.

[Dr. John DeLoney]

Yes.

[Actor]

Let's not risk it unless you want. Nowhere till you die.

[George]

Place your order.

[Actor]

It got declined.

[George]

Give me your car. That was a strong ending. Okay, first of all, that guy's got pipes. Like, don't put him against me on karaoke night. It's over.

[Actor]

Tell me why.

[Dr. John DeLoney]

And with those muscles, he is pretty jacked.

[George]

Golly.

[Dr. John DeLoney]

He's wearing the same size shirt as you.

[George]

Yeah, that's the key, is you gotta go a shirt or size down.

[Dr. John DeLoney]

Yeah. Or two or three. Yeah.

[George]

Work for you?

[Dr. John DeLoney]

Yeah. I took this out of my daughter's room.

[George]

Yeah, the schmedium. So the message here is clear. This is a husband who is low key, frustrated with his wife's spending habits

[Dr. John DeLoney]

and has horrific communication and conflict style

[George]

while having a wonderful singing voice. Which poses a problem.

[Dr. John DeLoney]

That does pose a problem. Which avenue do we choose?

[George]

And now he's trolling her with a karaoke song. Now it seems like she's in on it. I can tell she's having a good time secretly. Like she wants to laugh. You know what I mean? It's clearly a sketch.

[Dr. John DeLoney]

I think that's where a lot of your marriage challenges come from. Because she doesn't look like she's having fun here.

[George]

That's beneath the daggers.

[Dr. John DeLoney]

This is the face of I don't love you. I'm just glad your money direct deposits into our joint account. I know that phase.

[George]

If she could look with any more side eye, it'd be behind. The eyes would just be in the back of her.

[Dr. John DeLoney]

It's amazing. It's actually a clutch side eye.

[George]

But what I want to know are the women defending her, are they hating on him? So a lot of guys going, I'm going to show this to my wife.

[Dr. John DeLoney]

Hope it works.

[George]

Wish me luck, guys. All right, this guy is done for. Because this is what happens. People share this video with their spouse going, oh, that's you. Has that ever helped a marriage? Is the wife ever, like, ha, ha ha, so true.

[Dr. John DeLoney]

Oh, you're right. I do overspend.

[George]

I don't know if that's happening here. I don't know how to read a comment in. I don't know if that's Chinese. What language is Mandarin, maybe? All right, moving on. Before we watch this one, let me read you what's on the screen here. It says, when you remember you have a wife. Not on the mirror.

[Dr. John DeLoney]

I think this is actually what my wife thinks is in my head.

[George]

She walks in, and there's just towels on the floor, laundry. The mirror is disgusting.

[Dr. John DeLoney]

Yeah. I honestly think it's perfect. I need to show my wife this, actually, because I think that she's like, that's what's going on in his head.

[George]

He's intentionally making me angry.

[Dr. John DeLoney]

Correct.

[George]

Like, it's like trolling.

[Dr. John DeLoney]

Yes. Yeah, yeah. And I'll tell you this, not to, like, make this all dramatic all of a sudden, but I think the stories we make up about why our spouses do what they do or not do what they're not supposed to be doing or we don't want them to be doing, I think those stories are almost all of the problem. Oh, because like, let's say.

[George]

Cause she's just thinking this. They've never talked about it.

[Dr. John DeLoney]

Never talked about it.

[George]

Resentment is building and bubbling.

[Dr. John DeLoney]

Yes. He's doing this. Right?

[George]

And then one day she just snaps, and he's like, whoa, whoa, whoa.

[Dr. John DeLoney]

What just happened?

[George]

Where did that come from?

[Dr. John DeLoney]

Right? And it's all of these stories that have been building and building. But anyway, so don't make up stories about your spouse. Just ask him. Hey, are you dropping the towels right next to me?

[George]

Hey, would you mind wiping the mirror down? If you get a bunch of toothpaste, spit on it.

[Dr. John DeLoney]

Yeah. And he should go, yeah. That's disgusting. I'm sorry. I didn't even see it. Cool.

[George]

I think the only comment we need to read is this one. Praying for you, brother. Yes, that's what we need. More in the comments section is people praying for the creators of the video. I think that's really nice. We'll get back to the tomfoolery in just a moment. But first, quick psa. Please stop overpaying for your phone plan and instead switch to Boost Mobile, a sponsor of today's video. One of the easiest ways to save money every month is by ditching the overpriced phone plan you've had since your first breakup. Boost Mobile's forever plan with unlimited data, talk and text is just $25 a month, and that lets you unlock up to $600 a year in savings. And the best part, no contracts and the price never goes up, ever. So head to boostmobile.com Ramsey to get the deal based on average annual single line payment of AT&T Verizon T Mobile customers compared to 12 months in the Boost Mobile Unlimited plan as of January 2026. The website for full offer details. And before we get back to it, you know what really affects my mental health? Dealing with robocalls and spam texts. And that's why I'm such a big fan of Deleteme, a sponsor of today's video. Think of Delete Me like your personal digital therapist. They'll sift through hundreds of data broker sites and remove your personal info, leaving you feeling digital Zen. Namaste, my friends. My favorite part is the custom report they send you every few months explaining exactly what they've done and how much time they've saved you so you're never in the dark. And right now, they're offering 20% off their annual plans. To get the deal, go to joindeleteme.com George all right, let's get back to it. Let me read you the headline, John, in case you can't read from here. Person announcing they're leaving social media already. Love it. Whatever happens next is just gravy on top.

[Commentator]

I'm leaving social media and I can't say when I'll be back. This place is a toxic hellhole, and frankly, most of you belong here. As for me, I'm an intellectual, an explorer, a risk taker. I'm gonna slow down, smell the flowers, feel the sun on my skin. It's time to reconnect with the most important person I've ever met. Me. I'm taking a stand against big tech. And one day, maybe you'll have the same strength to do the same and post. Let's see if anyone liked it.

[George]

The greatest ending. Let's see if anyone liked it.

[Dr. John DeLoney]

That's great.

[George]

This is exactly how I feel about people who announce taking a break. Man, it feels like I'm holier than thou. And if only you guys could have the courage and bravery to do what I've done right. Why do we do this? Because I think the. The idea of taking a break is a great thing to do. Yeah, but why do we have to let other people know. What does that say about us?

[Dr. John DeLoney]

We've entered this weird matrix where we view ourselves through the eyes of everyone else. And so everything's a performance. And so even our quiet moments of like, reflection and I need to make some changes in my life, we need to go get on the street corner and announce it with a trumpet as they did in the old days or as you kids do with the Internet.

[George]

Well, it always is funny when someone's like filming an authentic moment. I'm like, yeah, but you're. You set up a camera.

[Dr. John DeLoney]

Yeah.

[George]

To then film a mo. An authentic moment. It just feels like it's just not real at that point. Now, if it's. You're playing with your kids or something, that's different.

[Dr. John DeLoney]

Yeah.

[George]

But if it's you going like, I'm journaling right now. It just feels a little bit perform

[Dr. John DeLoney]

if you're thinking of. Let me put it this way. The thing that our bodies are missing right now is presence. Being where you are. Right. And so if you are watching your daughter, if you are getting ready to surprise your wife, if you are at this amazing concert and you start to think, I, I want to make sure other people know I'm here or I want someone else to see this, or my daughter's gonna want to see this someday, you have left that moment and you're you. Part of you is gone now. Right. And that's challenging for that person. It's challenging for you because the moment, it's gone. And so figuring out ways I can stay present. Right. Which means you're not going to post stuff. And if you take a stand on something, own it. Right. Don't take it. And then see what everyone, how everyone thought about it. Right.

[George]

And then delete it if it doesn't get exactly.

[Dr. John DeLoney]

Yeah. Yeah.

[George]

Well, I know you go to a lot of concerts. What is your take on filming at a concert?

[Dr. John DeLoney]

So I will never understand paying the incredible ticket prices now. They're super high and going and watching this big Spectacle through a 3 inch screen the whole time. Like, I went and took my son to a concert the other night, someone he loves. He asked if I would film something.

[George]

Is Flippy on tour already?

[Dr. John DeLoney]

No, it's cool.

[George]

Sorry.

[Dr. John DeLoney]

It was some death metal band.

[George]

Wiggles.

[Dr. John DeLoney]

Yeah. But I. So I filmed it for him. I wasn't invested in the show, I was invested in him. And he's like, I want to see this. And he knows I'm going to be like, why are you recording something? We're here, right? Be with this song or whatever. Occasionally, I'll snap something if I want people to think I'm cool.

[George]

Yeah, I've seen a lot of that.

[Dr. John DeLoney]

But. But. But when you do that, when you pull out your phone, you've left the moment that this artist has created for you and this shared experience you've had with all these people. That's why you and I love going to comedy clubs. You walk in and they take your phone away, and you are in a dark room with two or three or 400 strangers, and you're having a shared experience. It could be a shared bad one or a shared great one or a shared hilarious one, but it's a shared experience, and I think that's why people who leave a good comedy show, it makes everything a week better. Yes. You just. Your body's like.

[George]

Yes.

[Dr. John DeLoney]

Thank you.

[George]

Can you imagine a comedy club? Everyone just had their phones out doing this.

[Dr. John DeLoney]

Yeah, it'd be a nightmare.

[George]

That's crazy.

[Dr. John DeLoney]

You missed the whole thing.

[George]

Yeah, well, sometimes you just want to capture the moment, your favorite song. But if you're living the concert that way, that's a lot for me. All right, we're done with Legit Pat. See you later, bud. Dad's in their 30s, trying to find something to connect over. This is me. I can already tell this is for me.

[Child]

Oh, which one's yours? Oh, mine's the one that keeps going up and down the big slide over there. What about yours? Oh, nice. Mine's the one on the monkey bars over there.

[Dr. John DeLoney]

Oh, yeah, yeah.

[Actor]

Cool.

[Child]

Cool. Yeah, yeah, yeah. So, favorite sport? Not really into sports all that much. No, no, of course not. You read any good books? Not really much of a reader. Okay, babe, two more times down the slide, and it's time to go home. Okay. Okay. 55 times. That's really funny.

[George]

Okay, for those that are uninitiated, what happened at the end, There was a reference to a sketch from I Think youk Should Leave, which is a show that Tim Robinson created, and they finally find something to bond over at the very end, where they look at each other like, oh, my gosh, you're into that thing, too. It's a beautiful moment that unfortunately, rarely happens in these scenarios. Never happens, usually. Just 15 more minutes of you just pushing your kid on a swing while standing next to another guy.

[Dr. John DeLoney]

I remember being at my son's Little League game right when we moved to Nashville, and we were standing. I was standing up against the fence while the kids were playing, and it was hot, and I was. There was a dad Right here and a dad right here. And I was like, what do you do for a living, man? And he told me, Then I answered, this guy answered. And then we just got closed. And then one guy goes, it's hot. And we're like, yeah. And I remember thinking, oh, this is the rest of my life.

[George]

Yep.

[Dr. John DeLoney]

Yeah. Yeah, that. That hits home.

[George]

So you talk a lot about how adults need to be better at making these connections, making friends, but then they experience this.

[Dr. John DeLoney]

Yes.

[George]

It's like going on a terrible date. And like, well, why would I ever try that again?

[Dr. John DeLoney]

Yes. And I. I think it's the wrong and fastest on the wrong syllable. Right. So, like, this is. I'm gonna go to the park, not use my kid to try to make me adult friends. I'm going to go to the park and be with my kid. Right. And then I am not going to use my child to try to double dip on this deal. I'm going to go do something, join

[George]

a rec league in town.

[Actor]

Yes.

[Dr. John DeLoney]

That's why I started doing stand up. And it's a lot of hang out with other adults all trying a thing together that.

[George]

Who all enjoy that thing.

[Dr. John DeLoney]

Right. And we fail miserably together. We have good successes together. We together. There's a lot of jokes, politics, a lot of discussions backstage, like, but you're doing a thing right. You join. My neighbor just joined a group called F3. It's like faith and fitness and stuff. And they give you a. Oh, yeah,

[George]

I tried that once.

[Dr. John DeLoney]

No, you didn't.

[George]

I promise you I did.

[Dr. John DeLoney]

He has no faith and he has.

[George]

Producer James Childs brought me and it was.

[Dr. John DeLoney]

So James has exercised.

[George]

Yeah. What? Just leave me out of this. And it was like 4am we're in the dark and they are running laps around me. And they gave me like a mean nickname and I was exhausted and I was like, well, this was fun. Never went back. Good times.

[Dr. John DeLoney]

That's why.

[George]

But also, I don't enjoy that.

[Dr. John DeLoney]

Exactly.

[George]

It's not a thing that I was like, this is a hobby I love to do, you know?

[Dr. John DeLoney]

And so I think, I think people are like, I want to do this. And because I'm doing this, I'm going to try to, like, back in this thing. Don't do that. Take your kid to the park and be with your kid at the park.

[George]

And then outside of that, if you

[Dr. John DeLoney]

end up making a friend there, great. But if you go there using your kid to try to do something like that.

[George]

Right. As a proxy. Yeah. Well, I need to find more people who enjoy Tim Robinson's sketches and work. So if you're out there.

[Dr. John DeLoney]

That was funny. That was good.

[George]

Hit me up. No one's gonna hit me up.

[Dr. John DeLoney]

No one will hit you up. That's fair.

[George]

Shall we continue?

[Dr. John DeLoney]

Continue. Let's rip it.

[George]

Any brain rot happening up there yet?

[Dr. John DeLoney]

Yeah, I died a few more grays 30 minutes ago. I like Trey.

[George]

Me determining if my wife's in the mood.

[Actor]

Stop.

[Child]

Yo, touch me.

[Dr. John DeLoney]

Don't touch me. Oh, why is this. Well done, Trey. That was good. That was good.

[George]

This is the funniest take on something that happens a lot.

[Dr. John DeLoney]

Yes.

[George]

So, like, as we go through this, like, there's an arc here, right? The guy is in the mood, Right. And she's clearly.

[Dr. John DeLoney]

For what? Just to.

[George]

I don't say on the channel, but he's just in the mood. He's wanting, you know, a little romance, let's say. And she clearly is in a state of.

[Dr. John DeLoney]

Not romance.

[George]

Yeah. I don't know what to call it. Vegging out, per se.

[Dr. John DeLoney]

Okay.

[George]

You know, blanket chips.

[Dr. John DeLoney]

Clearly irritated when the arm goes behind the head.

[George]

Oh, that's bad news Bears.

[Dr. John DeLoney]

Over.

[George]

I'm not doing this, guys.

[Dr. John DeLoney]

Abort mission.

[Actor]

Pull out.

[Dr. John DeLoney]

Abort, abort, abort, abort, abort, abort.

[George]

And he goes, all right, she's probably in the mood. And then he goes, oh, she looks annoyed. Feeling bloated. But I'm gonna ignore all of those red flags and still go in for the kill. And clearly it was a big miss. She said she was so tired an hour ago. Not relevant. Moving on. She's got to be interested. Engage and abort mission. This is what happens in a lot of relationships. And is it. Is it a timing thing? Like, how do you. They always say, like, you know, it starts in the kitchen. Like, it's like, do the dishes, and she's going to be super into romance.

[Dr. John DeLoney]

Nerds. Like, the nerd words for that is chore play.

[George]

That's what.

[Dr. John DeLoney]

That's what the researchers call it.

[George]

Wow.

[Dr. John DeLoney]

Yeah. But it's less about doing a particular chore, and it's more about actively participating in the life of the home.

[George]

Yes.

[Dr. John DeLoney]

Right. Not just coming in from work, dropping your bag wherever you want to, plopping down and being like, is this going to happen or what? Right. It's. Are you participating in the flow of this home?

[George]

And my wife has used this word a lot. The mental load. Now, this exists for all genders, but women especially. There is a mental load that the man is totally unaware of.

[Dr. John DeLoney]

Yes.

[George]

And the things that are, like, stressing her out right now. So I feel like if you can relieve the mental load without asking her and just proactively being like, oh, you know what, the sink's full.

[Dr. John DeLoney]

You want to. You want to go to a mental load? Rabbit hole here. Yeah, I got hot takes.

[George]

Gimme.

[Dr. John DeLoney]

Are you ready?

[George]

Hit me. This is going to be bad.

[Dr. John DeLoney]

Both people in a marriage generally are carrying some sort of mental load. And I remember sitting down with my wife and unpacking it. And this is embarrassing. It is. But I've never gone to the same dentist twice. Maybe in 20 years. Whenever I go to the dentist, I go once a year, once every two years. I just ask a buddy, hey, who's your dentist?

[George]

And you just keep dentist hopping.

[Dr. John DeLoney]

Yeah. Because every time I go, they make me do all the X rays and all the stuff. And so I don't remember where it was or I lived somewhere else. And so, like, it never occurs to me that my wife knows where the dentist is, their name, and when they're open. And also kids appointment. Like that doesn't. It never occurred to me similarly. And I know this is gross. Relax. Like, I will do the dishes when I open the cabinets and they're all gone, right? Like when I'm like eating cereal out of a salad bowl, I'm like, this is probably.

[George]

It's time.

[Dr. John DeLoney]

I'm a grown man. This is enough, right?

[George]

There's sort of a built in, right?

[Dr. John DeLoney]

So. And my wife, it's like she wants to do the dishes every day, right? I want to go to bed without that on there. And so the mental stuff can add up, right? I asked one time, I said, hey, can you put on the inside of the cabinet these numbers that you keep in your head? And she laughed and she's like, I will. But it kind of takes part of her identity. I'm the one who holds all this stuff, right? And on the other side, she had no idea how much. I am always checking our retirement balances, our mortgage balances, and all that kind of stuff. Like how I'm always coming home from work. Like, man, that last meeting didn't go good, dude. If one thing happens and this happens, then we're not gonna have a job and we're suddenly gonna. And so the reality that my wife and I both faced is, oh, we're both carrying a bunch of stuff. A, some of which is totally unnecessary in our choice to carry. B, we could. We're married, we can share some of this load and we can be honest about it and put on the table. And then if I I know when the kids get out of school, if I'm like, hey, when did they get out of school again? Then I'm a jerk, and I got to own that. If I know that my wife loves going to bed with a clean kitchen, why would I not help out? Right? That's so dumb. And if she knows how much I'm stressing about, like, finances and the state of the economy, and for her to be like, oh, my gosh, can you write her to enter into that space gently or kindly?

[George]

Right?

[Dr. John DeLoney]

So it's about putting all that stuff on the table and given your spouse, your partner, like, the opportunity to carry some of that with you. Right? And to put some of that.

[George]

Some of that stuff down instead of just holding it all inside and then being resentful that they don't magically know what's happening.

[Dr. John DeLoney]

That. And again, it goes back to the stories. If he really cared, he would know all of this stuff, right? Or if she really cared about our future, she would know that I'm thinking about this all the time. Well, they don't. They don't have any idea what's going on in each other's heads, right?

[George]

Yeah.

[Dr. John DeLoney]

And then it plays itself out here, which is, I need a break, and I want to connect, right? And then it's like, let's connect. Let's connect. And it's like, let's unplug. Like, oh, now you want to connect, right?

[George]

And she's thinking, I don't like this guy right now because last week he's ignored all of this stuff, and now

[Dr. John DeLoney]

he's like, hey, babe, let's make my move. Right? Right? It's perfect. Perfect, Trey.

[George]

Thanks, Trey.

[Dr. John DeLoney]

Perfect.

[George]

That was really helpful. Okay. As per usual, our producer selects one video that is unhelpful, unrelated to anything that someone would find helpful, but we watch it anyways. Are you willing? Do you consent? Okay. I'm not sure we need to watch that again, but it's on a loop, so I feel like I'm sort of, like, watching a car wreck right now. I'm gonna assume that this is not a bad actor. This is an actual, like, art exhibit, art performance situation.

[Dr. John DeLoney]

If you've never done shrooms. Yeah, this is a good reason to not.

[George]

Do you think you have to be on some sort of something in order to behave this way? No, I just never wanted to make

[Dr. John DeLoney]

out with a snare drum before right now.

[George]

Do you think you can go do that and mean it and really get into the moment?

[Dr. John DeLoney]

I mean, there's people that are more in touch with other parts of their

[George]

mind and speaks There's Information. Performed a solo percussion set. Bare knuckle. I didn't know that was a way to play drums. Bare knuckle. Solo percussion set. In Mumbai, December 21.

[Dr. John DeLoney]

Emerged from their underground punk circuit.

[George]

Emerging. Oh, this is making more sense. This is pretty punk rock.

[Dr. John DeLoney]

There's really nothing about this that makes sense.

[George]

I just don't think this makes sense in the environment that it's taking place.

[Commentator]

Ah.

[Dr. John DeLoney]

Which is why, again, social media decontextualizes everything.

[George]

Known for an extreme, stripped back drumming style that treats rhythm as a physical endurance rather than arrangement. So this like Fear Factor meets music. Like, how much pain can I endure while making sound?

[Dr. John DeLoney]

Yeah.

[George]

The audience.

[Dr. John DeLoney]

You can't hold on, man. This is postmodern. Like, you can't say. Treats rhythm as, like, rhythm is rhythm. It's a thing.

[George]

It's like math.

[Dr. John DeLoney]

You can count it. It's got a feel to it.

[George]

It's like I can feel it.

[Dr. John DeLoney]

You can't just be like, this rhythm is gonna not be an arrangement, which is what rhythm is. And it's gonna be a physical endurance context. It's like being like, this is a. This is a marathon. That instead of a running thing, we're actually just going to hit each other in the mouth with bricks. And it's like. Well, that makes it not a marathon.

[George]

Yeah. By definition.

[Dr. John DeLoney]

Yes. I would say, on behalf of the extraordinary drummers I've had an opportunity to meet.

[George]

That's not drumming. My first thought was I could be a drummer. Like, if this is what it takes,

[Dr. John DeLoney]

I could pull that off. I would pay money to see you kiss a snare drum.

[George]

Wow. Okay. Well, that was edifying to say the least.

[Dr. John DeLoney]

If you're into punk rock drumming, check out Travis Barker. Maybe just hashtag Just sayin. He plays a different kind of rhythm. One that has a beat and a groove to it. George is getting a workout.

[George]

Yeah. That was a sick concert, by the way. I was there with you.

[Dr. John DeLoney]

It's pretty good.

[George]

Epic.

[Dr. John DeLoney]

I saw you. I was. You know what? You weren't on anything that I knew of. We drove together and you, you, you, you, like, it came out of kind of like this guy.

[George]

Out of just anticipation.

[Dr. John DeLoney]

No, in the show. Oh, I saw you singing. And like, it was coming from a. Like, I was like, oh, there he is.

[George]

Yeah, a lot of. I mean, I was. I was fist pumping, I think is what it's called. That's my.

[Dr. John DeLoney]

You were like red face. Like you were singing.

[George]

I couldn't breathe.

[Dr. John DeLoney]

Yeah. Yeah, yeah.

[George]

Those guys, you know, especially Tom, he can get up there.

[Dr. John DeLoney]

They were feeling it.

[George]

Well, hey, John, thanks for being here.

[Dr. John DeLoney]

Hey, thanks for letting me watch other people on the Internet and talk about them.

[George]

This is what it's like to make life changing content. Try it out on your show.

[Dr. John DeLoney]

My life has been changed.

[George]

I thought you needed a breather from the heavy calls that you take. Let's just watch a guy on, you know, that's good.

[Dr. John DeLoney]

Usually when I need a breather, I get a drum and I just put it on my face and I run around the.

[George]

You don't have an audience for it. This guy's on tour, baby. Let me remind you, he's selling merch. Big thanks to John for joining me today. If you enjoyed this video, you'll definitely love his appearance with me on Millionaires and Cars Getting coffee on this very channel. So click here to watch that up next or use the link in the description. That's it for today. Subscribe to the channel if you haven't already hit like on this video. Thanks for watching. We'll see you next time.