Helpful Tips If Your OCD Flared Over Thanksgiving Weekend - Get to know OCD

Podcast Summary

Get to Know OCD: “Helpful Tips If Your OCD Flared Over Thanksgiving Weekend”

Host: Dr. Patrick McGrath (NOCD Chief Clinical Officer)
Date: November 30, 2025

Episode Overview

Dr. Patrick McGrath explores the challenges that people with OCD commonly face during and after stressful events like Thanksgiving weekend. He provides practical, compassionate advice for managing post-holiday stress, countering OCD-driven guilt and shame, and the importance of seeking support – all with his characteristically direct and reassuring tone.

Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Holidays as Stressors for OCD (00:00–01:10)

Dr. McGrath opens by acknowledging that, while holidays are meant to be fun, they are almost always stressors, and “boy, does OCD love a stressor.”
Quote:
“No matter how much fun a weekend may be or a holiday might be, it’s still a stressor. And boy, does OCD love a stressor and love to take advantage of stressors as a way to try to say, hey, hey, woohoo, look at me over here, yo.” (00:06)

2. Permission to Rest & Breaking Down Tasks (01:10–02:30)

Dr. McGrath emphasizes the importance of rest after hosting and acknowledges that OCD often pressures individuals to be productive at all times.
He recommends breaking overwhelming tasks into smaller, manageable pieces, using the pizza analogy:
Quote:
“How do you eat a giant extra extra extra extra extra large pizza? One bite at a time is how you do it.” (01:56)

3. OCD's Use of Guilt and Shame (02:30–04:15)

Dr. McGrath highlights that OCD seizes on not just anxiety and discomfort, but also guilt, shame, and disgust to dictate behaviors.
He encourages listeners to avoid being driven by negative self-talk and self-punishment.
Quote:
“OCD loves guilt… shame, guilt, disgust. These are all other emotions that OCD will grab onto to try to get people to do certain things and certain behaviors.” (02:39)
He cautions against using negative self-motivation and contrasts how people encourage loved ones versus how harsh they can be on themselves.
Quote (on self-talk):
“You wouldn’t say that to somebody you love. But would you say that to yourself? … That’s only going to bring you down, and it’s never going to build you up.” (03:45)

4. Normalizing Discomfort and Reaching Out (04:15–05:15)

It’s normal to feel uncomfortable or less than perfect after a taxing weekend, and acknowledging that is not defeat.
Dr. McGrath underscores the value in seeking help and support.
Quote:
“The beauty of being able to acknowledge that it isn’t that you’re admitting defeat. It means that you’re admitting that you could use some assistance and you could use some help.” (04:35)

5. The Coaching Analogy: Even Experts Get Help (05:15–06:35)

He draws a parallel to professional athletes, pointing out that even peak performers have coaches.
He confronts the myth that mental health is something one must handle alone.
Quote:
“Everybody has a coach. If you’re the kind of person who thinks, I have to do this on my own… But you also watch sports—and you watch people who… are considered to be at the top of athletic peak performance, who still get coached… Why is that okay for them, but it’s not okay for you?” (05:31)

6. Encouragement to Seek Professional Help (06:35–end)

Dr. McGrath emphasizes that help is available through NOCD, whether for OCD, anxiety, depression, trauma, BFRBs (body-focused repetitive behaviors), or hoarding.
Therapy is positioned as a way to have a knowledgeable companion “to walk beside you, to assist you so that you are also at the top of your game.”
Quote:
“You don’t have to do this by yourself. You don’t have to suffer in silence. Just like that athlete that you look up to, looks up to their coach. You can have a therapist who’s there to walk beside you, to assist you so that you are also at the top of your game. What could be better than that?” (07:40)

Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

Normalizing Self-Care:
“It’s okay to take a break. OCD may tell you you have to be productive at all times or else you’re lazy… But we don’t have to listen to OCD or anything that it says whatsoever, because, well, it just doesn’t tell the truth.” (00:36)
Practical Tip:
“If it is overwhelming looking at all of the stuff to do, it might be less overwhelming looking at one thing to do and then after that step, pick the next step… and so on and so forth.” (02:21)
Reframing Motivation:
“My motivator has to tear me down as a way to build me up, even though I would never do that to anyone else.” (03:22)
Permission for Help:
“If any of this has been going on, the good thing is there is a place to reach out… we have therapists waiting for you.” (06:52)

Timestamps for Key Segments

00:00 — Intro: How OCD capitalizes on post-holiday stress
01:10 — The importance of rest and breaking down overwhelming tasks
02:30 — OCD and the role of guilt, shame, and self-critical motivation
04:15 — Owning discomfort, reaching out for help
05:15 — Coaching analogy: Even experts need support
06:35 — Encouragement and resources for seeking therapy

Final Takeaways

Holidays can be stressful for people with OCD, fueling symptoms like guilt and shame, not just anxiety.
It’s healthy to take breaks and approach post-holiday overwhelm with self-compassion and practical steps.
Avoid harsh self-criticism and treat yourself with the same kindness you’d show a loved one.
Seeking support – whether from a therapist, coach, or loved one – is a sign of strength, not weakness.

This episode offers relatable reassurance and actionable advice for anyone whose OCD symptoms flared up over Thanksgiving weekend, blending everyday wisdom with therapeutic expertise.

Transcript

A (0:00)

Well, hopefully you made it through the Thanksgiving weekend relatively unscarred. Here's the deal. No matter how much fun a weekend may be or a holiday might be, it's still a stressor. And boy, does OCD love a stressor and love to take advantage of stressors as a way to try to say, hey, hey, woohoo, look at me over here, yo. And so let's talk about a couple of things that you can do to make sure that OCD doesn't try to worm its way in back into your life. Foreign. Number one, it's okay to take a break, right? Chill out, relax. If you were the host and you had to prep and then clean up and everything, nothing wrong with just sitting back and chilling out for a little while, right? OCD may tell you you have to be productive at all times or else you're lazy and things of that nature. But we don't have to listen to OCD or anything that it says whatsoever because, well, it just doesn't tell the truth. So give yourself a little permission to take that break. If there's a lot of things that are still sitting out there to do and they feel overwhelming to do, remember that you can always break it apart into small tasks, right? How do you eat a giant extra extra extra extra extra large pizza? One bite at a time is how you do it. And that's what you have to do also with the things that are going on in your life. If it is overwhelming looking at all of the stuff to do, it might be less overwhelming looking at one thing to do and then after that step, pick the next step to do, and then pick the next step to do, and then pick the next step to do, and so on and so forth. OCD loves guilt. Right? Now you may hear things about OCD being anxiety or discomfort, but the definition of OCD missed out a little bit in the diagnostic manual and should have also included things like shame, guilt, disgust. These are all other emotions that OCD will grab onto to try to get people to do certain things and certain behaviors and move them in certain directions. So maybe you weren't as productive this weekend as you'd hoped to be and you could feel some guilt about that, and OCD could really be pounding you about that. But you could also just say it was nice to chill out for a while, it was nice to take a break, it was nice to relax. And now I'll just get that stuff done in the next few weeks and I'll come up with a plan for it and I'll Work on following the plan. That's another way to approach things, right? We don't have to be driven by guilt and shame all of the time. We don't have to use those as motivators to make ourselves better. I call this specialness sometimes, this idea that my motivator has to tear me down as a way to build me up, even though I would never do that to anyone else. Think for a moment. If you have a child or a niece or a nephew who are in a piano recital, you're probably going to say to them, I'm really proud of you. I can't wait to hear you play tonight. Have a great recital. You probably aren't going to say to them something along the lines of, I've heard you practice. What a waste of money the lessons have been. We're pretty embarrassed to even be related to you. When you're done with the recital, just sneak out the side door. We'll be waiting. We'll drive off quickly so nobody sees us. You wouldn't say that to somebody you love. But would you say that to yourself? Would you use that kind of motivation to try to make yourself better? And if that's the case, well, here's something we know already that's only going to bring you down, and it's never going to build you up. If it's what's happening, then it's okay. Just to acknowledge, hey, I'm not comfortable right now. Things don't feel the way that I want them to. And the beauty of being able to acknowledge that it isn't that you're admitting defeat. It means that you're admitting that you could use some assistance and you could use some help. And there's nothing wrong with reaching out for support. In fact, many people over this last weekend probably watched a lot of sports. You know, we look at football being huge over the Thanksgiving break, but there may be other tryouts, like for Olympics or various other sports that are going on. And here's one thing that I know about all sports. Everybody has a coach. If you're the kind of person who thinks, I have to do this on my own, I have to suffer through this and I have to figure it out all by myself. But you also watch sports, and you watch people who are potentially paid millions and millions of dollars, who are considered to be at the top of athletic peak performance, who still get coached, who still get support, who still are told, hey, try it this way and see if that works better. Why is that okay for them, but it's not okay for you? Or do you hold on to that unfortunate notion that it's okay if we're not physically at our top, but we always have to be 100% mentally at our top? Because if that's the case, well, all you're going to do is find faults in ways that you react to things and you're just going to dig yourself deeper and deeper. If any of this has been going on, the good thing is there is a place to reach out. You can check us out at NOCD. Just go to NOCD.com that's N O C D.com because we have therapists waiting for you who can help you with anxiety, obsessive compulsive disorder, mood issues like feeling depressed, trauma. We can work with body focused, repetitive behaviors like hair pulling and skin picking and ticks, and we can even work with hoarding too. You don't have to do this by yourself. You don't have to suffer in silence just like that athlete that you look up to, looks up to their coach. You can have a therapist who's there to walk beside you, to assist you so that you are also at the top of your game. What could be better than that?