Podcast Summary: Get to Know OCD

Episode: Nothing Was Ever “Just Right” For Alex Anele's OCD
Host: Dr. Patrick McGrath (Chief Clinical Officer, NOCD)
Guest: Alexandra Anele (YouTuber, Beauty Content Creator)
Date: February 1, 2026

Main Theme

This episode centers on Alexandra Anele's personal journey living with OCD—particularly struggles with "just right" and perfectionistic compulsions. She discusses discovering her symptoms, the impact on her work and life, misconceptions about OCD, and her transformative experience with Exposure and Response Prevention (ERP) therapy. The conversation emphasizes the broader emotional toll of OCD (including shame and guilt), the process of seeking help, and the power of self-compassion.

Key Discussion Points & Insights

Alexandra’s Early OCD Experiences

• Earliest Symptoms: Counting, color-coordinating candy as a child ([04:05]).

• High School Onset: Obsessions with cleanliness, especially regarding dishes and glassware in restaurants; avoidance behaviors became increasingly disruptive ([04:12]).

  “It started to really affect my life and also…the people around me, because we would have to leave a restaurant.” – Alexandra ([04:30])

• Delayed Recognition: Initially thought her behaviors were normal or simply “grossed out.” Only later considered OCD after seeing NOCD ads referencing her experiences with CBT ([05:27]).

Misconceptions About OCD

• Many assume OCD is just about hand washing or checking, missing its pervasive impact ([03:09]).
• Alexandra shares how her own understanding shifted from stereotypes to recognizing OCD's reach into almost every aspect of her life ([03:31]).

The Immense Impact on Daily Life

• “Just right” and “perfectionistic” compulsions profoundly interfered with Alexandra’s life:

  • Became paralyzing and prevented her from working, socializing, or even completing simple household tasks ([10:47], [11:33]).
  • Created a feedback loop of shame and anxiety.

  “Things need to be just right—has been crippling, especially in the last like four years for me. It's prevented me from being able to get work done. It's prevented me from being social.” – Alexandra ([11:33])

• Shame, guilt, disgust are equally as central as anxiety:

  “…It's not that you're just going to be anxious and you're doing these compulsions to stop anxiety, you are also going to do it to stop guilt and shame.” – Dr. McGrath ([12:38])

The Experience with ERP Therapy

• Initial anticipation of ERP (Exposure and Response Prevention) is much worse than the reality ([07:13]).

  “The anticipation was so much worse than what you experienced. And you are able to move through that and you find this sense of calm.” – Alexandra ([07:32])

• ERP provided Alexandra with tangible, immediate relief—contrasting with years of less effective CBT ([07:44]).

  “ERP gave me something tangible...I felt something real here. I felt this actual moment of relief.” – Alexandra ([07:50])

• Letting go of “safety behaviors” (like deep breathing or muscle relaxation) only truly helped once she stopped seeing them as solutions ([09:08]).

How OCD Affected Her Work as a Content Creator

• Self-employment and control over her environment heightened her “just right” compulsions ([10:40]).

• Symmetry OCD even impacted her makeup routines and video production:

  “I struggle a lot with symmetry OCD. And...how that symmetry OCD affects me doing my makeup.” – Alexandra ([27:07])

• Clutter or minor disorder in her home could block her from even starting creative work ([27:04]).

Positive Changes After Treatment

• Marked reduction in the “noise” and anxiety in daily life ([15:00]).

  “Overall, I think with the ERP...the noise in my head that used to exist has been brought down significantly.” – Alexandra ([15:00])

• Now able to function more confidently and comfortably—e.g., can eat and drink at restaurants without obsessive anxiety ([29:28]).

• Greater ability to be present:

  “Now being present is—it feels natural. It feels like I'm not forcing myself.” – Alexandra ([30:57])

Self-Compassion and the Emotional Journey

• Recognizing and working through decades of shame, and learning self-compassion, was a turning point ([14:01], [37:33]).

  “That self compassion, being able to tap into that…has been life changing.” – Alexandra ([38:19])

• Self-acceptance and not letting OCD define self-worth is a major takeaway ([40:17]).

Advice for Others

• Don't delay seeking help out of pride or fear; trying the “same things” won’t magically start working ([36:12]).

  “At some point, you reach a point where you—you can't do it by yourself.” – Alexandra ([32:56])

• ERP/Therapy is less terrifying than anticipated and support matters, especially from professionals who understand OCD ([24:15]).

• Working with a therapist helps expose suppressed emotions and is more effective than attempting exposures alone ([32:09]).

• For those doubting their symptoms are “bad enough” or those hesitating to get help:

  “…If you feel like you resonate at all with any of the things that I say, just give it a Google…seek out some kind of ERP therapy because it's so life changing and you're never going to know until you just give it a shot.” – Alexandra ([22:58])

Accessing Effective Treatment

• Alexandra discovered NOCD through online ads and emphasizes the importance of accessible, specialized care ([20:49]).
• Notes challenges for those without insurance, highlighting the need for broader accessibility ([21:15]).
• Praises NOCD’s customer service and therapist-matching process ([32:56]).

Reflections on Progress

• There’s no “cure”—OCD is chronic, but with ongoing support and ERP, it is manageable ([34:49], [37:00]).

  “Try different, not harder.” – Dr. McGrath ([37:00])

Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• "That idea that things need to be just right has been crippling… It’s prevented me from being able to get work done…It just feeds the OCD." – Alexandra ([00:00], [11:33])

• "The anticipation is what is so terrifying…once you actually experience ERP…you realize the anticipation was so much worse than what you experienced." – Alexandra ([07:13])

• “OCD will use any emotion that it possibly can in order to get you to do a compulsion.” – Dr. McGrath ([12:38])

• “No, exactly, exactly.” – Alexandra, when asked if OCD will ever be satisfied ([19:21])

• "Try different, not harder." – Dr. McGrath ([37:00])

• "Now being present is—it feels natural. It feels like I'm not forcing myself." – Alexandra ([30:57])

• "That self compassion, being able to tap into that when I have a negative thought…Has been life changing." – Alexandra ([38:19])

Important Timestamps by Topic

• 00:00 – Alexandra describes the crippling need for things to be “just right”
• 04:05 – Early childhood OCD symptoms, onset of “contamination” obsession
• 07:13 – Alexandra describes ERP; the role of anticipatory anxiety
• 10:40 – Impact of OCD on daily life and creative work
• 12:38 – Shame and other emotions in OCD discussed
• 15:00 – Improvements and the effect of ERP on anxiety levels
• 17:22 – Alexandra discusses learning to trust her own body/mind versus OCD’s doubts
• 22:58 – Advice for those hesitant about seeking help
• 27:07 – Symmetry OCD’s influence on makeup and work
• 29:28 – Living life post-ERP; newfound ability to participate in daily activities
• 32:56 – Working with therapists; importance of support, customer service experiences
• 37:00 – On trying different approaches, not harder (“Try different, not harder.”)
• 38:19 – Reflection on self-compassion as critical to recovery

Tone and Style

• Warm, candid, and encouraging. Alexandra is honest about challenges but speaks with hope and tangible optimism. Dr. McGrath is supportive, validating, and injects humor and professional insights.

Conclusion & Takeaways

Alexandra’s journey powerfully illustrates the complexity of OCD—how it extends far beyond stereotypes, embedding itself in daily routines, relationships, and self-image. She highlights the relief and life change possible with the right treatment (ERP), honest self-reflection, and self-compassion. Her advice: Don’t wait, seek help, and release the myth that you have to do it alone or “just try harder.” Support is available, and progress—even comfort—is possible.

Where to Find Alexandra Anele

• On all major social apps under “Alexandra Anele” ([41:11])

“Be better to yourself than your OCD ever will be.” – Dr. McGrath ([41:15])