Don't Let The Sun Go Down On You

Summary

Podcast Summary: Gettin’ Grown

Episode Title: Don’t Let the Sun Go Down On You
Hosts: Keia & Jade (Loud Speakers Network)
Date: February 11, 2025

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Main Theme & Episode Overview

This episode of "Gettin’ Grown" is rooted in honest, hilarious, and heartfelt reflections on adulthood, Black womanhood, and the struggle (and joy) of learning to “adult” in unpredictable times. As Keia and Jade maneuver through personal check-ins, Black History Month observations, pop culture commentary, and a deep dive into mapping intentions for the new year, they invite listeners to join the journey of choosing joy and showing up for themselves—despite the chaos of the world. The central piece of the episode is their “Bingo Card for 2025” exercise, a new, gentle alternative to vision boards or traditional resolutions, focused on daily habits and intentional living.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Catching Up, Humor, and Check-Ins

[05:25–07:55]

• Jade and Keia reflect on their current states: tired, swinging between emotions, but maintaining gratitude and humor.
• “I’m swinging violently from the chandelier between trying to be okay and not. But, you know... I’m trying to find the fun in swinging from that chandelier.” – Jade [05:50]
• They riff on sweaty, “greasy” men as an adult rite of passage.

2. Black History Month, Pettiness, and Daily Life

[10:10–14:36]

• Keia shares a petty but prideful Black History Month anecdote about dealing with a fellow airline passenger.
• “Happy Black History Month. Good morning.” – Keia to a MAGA-clad traveler, causing a commotion and earning a flight attendant’s giggle [11:06].
• The hosts bemoan the continued ignorance and disrespect toward Black culture, infusing humor and pride throughout.

3. Grammys, Pop Culture, and Beyoncé Discourse

[14:44–36:24]

• The duo debriefs the Grammy awards, expressing joy over Kendrick Lamar, Doechii, and Beyoncé’s wins, but also express nuanced concerns about consumerism and timing around Beyoncé’s tour announcement.
• “I love Beyoncé, I hate the timing of this. I am critical of the timing... I just find it to be not an amazing time to be dropping concert tickets.” – Jade [28:46]
• “If this is something that I can look forward to... it felt like, okay, all right. And if everything else goes to shit, at least...” – Keia on choosing joy and anticipation [29:29]
• They discuss complex feelings: joy, criticality, and finding space for both in community.

4. Layered Hope and Global Struggle

[36:24–39:14]

• Jade emphasizes the complexity of feeling joy amidst global suffering—in Gaza, Sudan, Congo, Haiti—and the importance of seeking “glimmers of light.”
• “All of these complicated human feelings are part of the human experience...” – Jade [36:24]
• Both encourage educating, donating, and checking available resources.

5. Kitchen TableTalk: 2025 Bingo Cards

[41:51–77:15]
The heart of the episode: Instead of conventional goals or vision boards, Keia and Jade share their “2025 Bingo Cards”—a grid of intentions and habits to fill their lives with purpose, health, creativity, and joy.

Sample Bingo Squares & Intentions:

• Go outside once a day – Jade [42:18]
  • For intentional exposure to sunlight and mood improvement.
• Daily step goals (8–10k) – Keia [44:04]
  • Noticing the impact of a sedentary pandemic lifestyle, Keia commits to moving more.
• Daily movement/workouts – Both [46:12]
• Daily prayer/journal time – Keia [46:34]
  • Cultivating intentional moments with God and reflection.
• Reading an actual book daily – Jade [47:30]
  • Modeling non-screen habits for herself and her child.
• Intentional in-person friend time (monthly) – Keia [49:22]
  • “Now more than ever is what's going to be the thing that sustains us and keeps us.” – Keia [50:24]
• Intentional joy-seeking and being present – Jade [53:02]
  • Seeking out genuine, not superficial, sources of joy.
• Writing and creative output (book, Substack, Team Typing Fast revamp) – Keia [54:35, 59:16]
  • Reconnecting to the passion of writing for self, not just audience.
• Sunday Dinner Series, Cookbook drafting – Jade [60:10]
  • Reclaiming and reviving Black culinary and family traditions.
• Printing, archiving, and displaying family photos – Both [65:08, 71:34]
  • Preserving Black family legacies and narratives outside of digital space.
• Dancing, music (flute!), archery, and hobbies – Jade [75:55]
  • Reclaiming bodily joy and traditional skills.

6. Encouragement to Listeners

• They urge listeners to share their own bingo cards or intentions, emphasizing that prioritizing joy, hope, and community is vital amidst broader social upheavals. “Don’t let the sun go down on your bingo card.” [78:45]

7. Petty Peeves

[79:24–87:07]

• Jade’s Petty Peeve: Young people misusing hot combs without guidance. “You have to ask questions when you don’t know what you’re doing... Please, put the hot combs down.” – Jade [80:13]
• Keia’s Petty Peeve: Accessibility frustrations with product packaging due to arthritis; a practical, real-life challenge.

8. Self-Care (Lessons in Black Women Self-Care)

[79:57, 87:24–89:06]

• The episode itself is framed as an act of self-care: “I think this was a self-care.” – Jade [78:55]
• Concluding advice: prioritize your mind, drink water, “moisturize your skin,” and resist letting outside forces steal your purpose or hope.

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Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• “I’m swinging violently from the chandelier between trying to be okay and not.” – Jade [05:50]
• “Happy Black History Month. Good morning.” – Keia (airplane petty) [11:06]
• “I just want you to boo them...” – Jade, on confronting bigots with humor [12:00]
• “...I’m whipping it out and I’m pissing on everything. I’m pissing on your MAGA hat... I’m so sick of everything.” – Jade, expressing exasperation with political climate [14:04]
• “All of these complicated human feelings are part of the human experience...” – Jade [36:24]
• “Don’t let the sun go down on your bingo card.” – Keia and Jade [78:45]
• “Your largest organ is your skin and you want to be intentional about keeping that moisturized as well because your plaque will crack if it's dry.” – Keia [89:06]

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Important Timestamps

• [05:25] – Check-in: current mood, gratitude, and swings of emotion
• [10:13–14:36] – Black History Month pettiness, plane story
• [14:44–36:24] – Grammys, Beyoncé discourse, pop culture, nuanced joy
• [36:24–39:14] – Gaza, Sudan, Haiti, Black internationalism, hope amidst despair
• [41:51–77:15] – Bingo Card segment: setting and discussing 2025 intentions
• [79:24–87:07] – Petty Peeves: hot combs, product accessibility
• [87:24–89:06] – Self-care wrap-up and closing advice

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Tone & Style

The episode is a vibrant mix of sharp wit, Black cultural commentary, tender vulnerability, and soulful celebration of daily life. Keia and Jade blend genuine humor, lighthearted pettiness, and deep wisdom, maintaining an authentic, sisterly, and ever-Black tone throughout.

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Useful for Listeners Who Missed the Episode

• Expect relatable tales about adulting, hilarious yet pointed social critique, and creative approaches to self-improvement in tough times.
• The “bingo card” format models accessible, low-pressure goal-setting, deeply attuned to the challenges of the current world.
• Listeners are invited into creative, critical, and joyful practices of community even (especially) as chaos rages on.

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Call to Action:
Share your own bingo cards for the year, celebrate Black joy, and don’t be afraid to be “petty” (or deeply practical) in defending your boundaries, traditions, and dreams.

Transcript

[A]

So I was just parking my car and then I saw you. The Gecko. Huge fan.

[B]

I'm always honored to meet fans out in the wild.

[A]

The honor is mine. I just love being able to file a claim in under two minutes with the Geico app.

[C]

Well, the Geico app is top notch.

[A]

I know you get asked this all the time, but could you sign it?

[C]

Sign what?

[B]

The app. Yeah, sure.

[A]

Oh, that means so much. Oh, it rubbed off the screen when I touched it. Could you sign it again?

[C]

Anything to help, I suppose.

[A]

You're the best.

[B]

Get more than just savings. Get more with Geico.

[A]

Hey, hate to do this. Could we reschedule our morning hike? I was just about to ask the same next week. Yes, it's Dunkin Original Blend time.

[B]

Staying at home with Duncan. Don't mind if I do.

[C]

The home with Duncan is where you want to be. It's not your situation. I just need contemplation.

[B]

Oh, hey.

[C]

It'S not so systematic. It's just that I'm an addict. For your love not the only one that holds you I never should have told you you're my only girl.

[B]

Now I should have told you I'm not.

[C]

The only one that holds you I never ever should have told you you're my only girl Come, Georgie Porgy pudding pie kiss the girls and make them cry Georgie Porgy pudding pie kiss the girl that is the Eric Benet and Faith Evans version. House of Maverick.

[B]

Yes. Oh, wait.

[C]

You have been. What?

[B]

No. That song has always confounded me my whole life. Go ahead.

[C]

This is like.

[B]

What are they talking about?

[C]

It's because it is not an Eric Benet song.

[B]

Right? I think it is.

[C]

It is a toto song. And for those who don't know who toto is, they're the ones who. Who felt the reins down in Africa. Okay. Mount Kilimanjaro. White men.

[B]

Really?

[C]

Yes. They're the ones who originally sang Georgie Porgy. Now let's see what it's about. Let's look. I've never looked at that, actually. Okay, let me see. Georgie.

[B]

Eric Benet would get up one morning and say, I'm gonna remake Georgie.

[C]

Porsche. Let me see. What? There's a lot of people who remade things that they probably shouldn't have. Okay. The meaning of Georgie Porgy.

[B]

Let's see the girls that make them cry. That's giving harassment. Georgie. Georgie. It's giving jail immediately.

[C]

Well, you know, that's the. That's the. That's the nursery rhyme. What is it? Georgie porgy pudding pie kissed the girls and made them cry.

[B]

Don't make me cry.

[C]

Wait, hold on. Okay, background perform Critical reception. No, I want to know what the song is about. Y' all don't even know. What is the meaning behind Georgie Porgy? Most historians agree that the classic nursery rhyme is about Prince Regent George, 4th of Britain, probably a terrible person, ridiculed for his hefty weight, and he had a reputation for lusting after food and women.

[B]

Oh, Jeff.

[C]

Reportedly, he left a string of illegitimate children behind. Oh, he was the original. Papa was a Rolling Stone.

[B]

Oh, my God.

[C]

Yes.

[B]

Ew.

[C]

Yes.

[B]

I just visualize a greasy man just being gross. Ew.

[C]

Oh, that is worse than a greasy. Have you. Never mind. You know what? I. That's. This is. Praise the Lord.

[B]

Praise the Lord. Yes. That was a bit of a tangent.

[C]

I was gonna ask you if you've ever. If you've ever, you know, been in the proximity of a greasy man, but it was starting to slide into, like, you know, no. No territory, so I was like, you know, let's just rewind. Hello.

[B]

Let's make a hard left turn somewhere else and praise the Lord.

[C]

You ever been up under a sweaty. No.

[B]

Just perspiring all over the place. Just sitting there, sweating. Just running.

[C]

You working? You working hard? Running hot. It's like, what's wrong with you? You okay?

[B]

I'm just hot. I'm just sweating.

[C]

I'm having a flash while the belts knock on the headboard.

[B]

Listen. No, you got high cholesterol, sir. We need to address it.

[C]

No, sometimes they just putting in work. Yes. Praise the Lord. Good day. Good day. Good evening.

[B]

Well, yes, welcome back to the kitchen table, where we discuss the vicissitudes of.

[C]

This volatile ghetto we call adulthood, including being. Being up under a sweaty. It's part of adulthood. Everybody's done it. Lord Jesus.

[B]

Oh, sister.

[C]

How are you doing today? You know, I am. I am here, and I am grateful to be here, you know, despite everything. And I. I'm swinging violently from the chandelier between trying to be okay and not. But, you know, it's. I'm trying to find the fun in swinging from that chandelier. How are you?

[B]

I am. I am doing the best I can. I am, as Anita says, giving you the best that I got. That's what I'm doing.

[C]

Let me. Hold on. I think there's. There's a video that explains my. That explains my mood perfectly. Oh, here. Yes. I'll let you just hear it and also see. Can you hear it as well?

[B]

Oh, my God, look at this. Y' all. What on earth? You have to get your face, y', all, so you can witness this, this, this that I am being forced to witness right now. I want you all.

[C]

That's how I feel. Throw the lighter on the gasoline. We live. We are slimming.

[B]

I. I am grateful like you. I'm grateful that I am safe. I have what I need.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

And I am just really trying to stay right there in that place, stay present in my current situation as, you know, day to day, things change.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

So we are, we are just. We are yet holding on.

[C]

I was praying last night and I said, I said, God, this sucks. But also I'm so grateful to be alive and I don't know why. I hope that makes sense.

[B]

Those things can be true.

[C]

Absolutely.

[B]

I, I too. I was listening. I listened to a sermon over the weekend about prayer and he said something along the lines of, like, you know, a lot of times our prayer lives suffer or, you know, because we're doing all of the talking. Sometimes it is just about saying like, hey, man, what? And then, and then just getting somewhere and being quiet until you get some sort of answ or some sort of clarity or some sort of something. And so I don't feel like God has an expectation for us to do anything other than be like, I'm sorry, what? Right now?

[C]

No, I think God. I mean, when I call, I think God looks at the caller ID and says, okay.

[B]

You know, my thing is that I. It would be one thing, like, I don't think I ever hang up. I just feel like I am con.

[C]

God is true. Oh, like the monkey on hoe would be like.

[B]

Walking around the kitchen with the phone and the crook of his neck just listening to me.

[C]

Washing all day, prepping dinner. Yeah, that's fair. That's fair. Yes. I mean, you've what now? Yes, I'm still here. I'm still here.

[B]

Yeah, I'm still here. I'm sorry, what did you say? I didn't hear you because you were screaming at the top of your lungs. Can you please calm down and say it again? Because I don't know what you're.

[C]

Please, God.

[B]

What was it?

[C]

What is the plan? What is the plan? Cue me in any sort of, you know, cliff note or out footnote, prompt something. Something like, just hold on, I'll play a song. I don't even care who it's by. Bon Jovi. I'll listen, I'll hear it. Just tell me, like, stop, please. Cuz this is crazy time is what it is. But, you know.

[B]

Yeah, I.

[C]

It's Black History Month, and it is.

[B]

And for that, you know, I will say. And I was going to share this as a part of my petty pee, but not really by. It's about my pettiness, not anybody else's. There was. I had to fly back from Nashville. I was in Nashville last week for a work trip and got on the plane to DCA and was greeted by a woman who had on all of the Trump paraphernalia that she could purchase at one time. I'm sure. I mean, hat, scarf, socks, sweatshirt. She had a jacket just out here. Okay. Getting all. And she had an EBT card, I'm sure, somewhere on her person.

[C]

I hope you walked past her and said, let me know how that diabetes medication is looking soon.

[B]

You know, she gets on the plane, I get on the plane, and she's, like, shocked to see me. Like, you know how they do that double take? Like, what are you doing here? How did you respond to her? Oh, good morning. I said, good morning. Happy Black History Month. Good morning. And she was just. She snarled. She was like, all right. It's gonna be all right, Ruth. Okay, Let me tell you what. It's gonna be just fine. Please, you stay on your side of the plane. I'm gonna stay over here. But Happy Black History Month to you, because we're still celebrating.

[C]

I need you to do something on behalf of me by proxy, okay? The next time, because you. You fly a little bit more frequently than I do, and, you know, because of your stature, you will get a little bit more of that. That I will. And so I need you the next time that you. That this happens, because it's going to happen again. I need you to just look at them go.

[B]

Boo.

[C]

And I just. I just want you to boo them and see what. I want them to jump out of their skin and realize how ridiculous they are. Like, scare them. Paul Mooney said, when a white woman runs, you chase her. So I need you to do that. That's my motto. All 20, 25, y' all are running. I'm chasing you. Yeah.

[B]

Her. Let me tell you something. The fight attended. It was a. It was a black man. I tell you, he giggled. I mean, he was good.

[C]

And tickled.

[B]

When I said, happy Black History.

[C]

Happy Black History.

[B]

He said, hey, I know.

[C]

That's right. Yeah.

[B]

Yeah. Happy Black History Month.

[C]

You don't want to piss off the flight attendant. Let me tell you something. So you mind.

[B]

You can scoot on over. You can scoot on back. Okay, get to your seat and set out.

[C]

Pipe Down, Earlene, nobody has time for your. Where was she going?

[B]

She was coming here to D.C. she was leaving Nashville and coming to D.C.

[C]

Probably to visit yet insurrection.

[B]

Something.

[C]

Yes.

[B]

Yeah. Perhaps she just wanted to stand in front of the Capitol.

[C]

And as they, you know, because they are coming to travel there, they are very excited to stand directly in front of the White House, like, immediately in front of it. They want to be. And they're upset when they get there and find out that they can only get within 800ft of it.

[B]

Yeah, good luck with that.

[C]

Good luck. I mean, you guys can do that on your anniversary, the 6th of January.

[B]

Have a great time.

[C]

But that is getting ready to go back to Nashville. And she's gonna go back to her regular routine of visiting the Tuesday morning once a week and having her nasty wheat coffee with her mindless gaggle of parakeet friends. But as for us, we. If you all are not going to acknowledge it's Black History Month, we're going to acknowledge it's Black History Month. Know, despite your federal and everything else, when I tell you, like, I wish I had a penis, I would be free pissing on everything right now. What do you mean? What? I'm whipping it out. I'm whipping it out and I'm pissing on everything. I'm pissing on your maga hat. I'm pissing on your sketches. I pissing on everything. I'm so sick of everything.

[B]

Oh, my word.

[C]

I'm pissing on your Chappelle Roan cd. I'm pissing.

[B]

First of all, did you happen to see.

[C]

Yes.

[B]

What happened at the Grammys? Is it chapel or Chappelle?

[C]

I don't know. I, I, I call her Chappelle Roan.

[B]

Well, one thing I know for sure.

[C]

What's her song?

[B]

Who cares? Why were they rude to baby Face?

[C]

Well, she wasn't. It was the other white girls. How did they get on the. How did they get there? Because they seem like somebody's children. It's like, bring your, your pre teens.

[B]

To work day, Daughters. Bring your tweens to work day.

[C]

Okay. Oh. Oh, that's her song. Okay.

[B]

What's her song?

[C]

There are so many reasons I love my trill. The way her fragrance keeps mice away in a New York City apartment. The way she rams me like a goat when she wants affection. The way she bites at my legs when she needs love. The way she nestles into the COVID of my butt when she's ready to go to sleep. It's just precious, all that. That's why you keep them, but it's not always cuddly teddy bears and all that. And I'm not just talking about them attempting to feast on your houseplants. I'm talking about my arch nemesis, the Litter Box. Negative Stars zero recommendations Scoop scoop de oop. No more with Litter Robot by Whisker the fairy godmother to all your litter box problems. Little Robot by Whiskers Self cleaning technology automatically cleans after every use, so your cats will always fresh area to drop their kids off at the sandbox, if you know what I'm saying. And when your homegirls drop by at 11am to have dirty martinis and play bridge, they won't even know you have a cat. Litter Robot will send a notification to your phone when it needs to be emptied and even gives you data and insights to stay on top of your cat's health. Litter Robot is the perfect gift for any occasion. Gender Reveal Housewarming Tupperware Party the possibilities are endless. Join over 1 million happy pets and pet parents who've upgraded to Litter Robot. I'm a cat lady, but I never want to smell like one and I'm obsessed with nose blindness, so you better believe I was wearing myself out bending over to scoop and dispose of cat excrement on the daily the little robot Bibbidi Bobbidi booed right into change my life with the rotating feature that sifts the clean litter while dropping the poops down to their own compartment. So all I have to do is pull that bag out, do a nice little disinfectant wipe down and replace. And just like every part of your life, there should be the occasional deep clean. So there's a feature to empty all the litter as well so you can scrub it out replace with a fresh batch. The litter robot is that girl. It also eases my nerves knowing that her health is being monitored and reported to me. As a special offer to listeners of the show, go to stopscooping.com grown and use promo code GROWN to save an additional $50 on any litter robot bundle. That's $50 off any litter robot bundle at stopscooping.com grown and Use promo code grown stopscooping.com grown promo code grown stopscooping dot com grown promo code grown so.

[A]

I was just parking my car and then I saw you. The Gecko. Huge fan.

[B]

I'm always honored to meet fans out in the wild.

[A]

The honor is mine. I just love being able to file a claim in under two minutes with the Geico app.

[C]

Well, the Geico app is top notch.

[A]

I know you get asked this all the time, but could you sign it?

[C]

Sign what?

[B]

The app. Yeah, sure.

[A]

Oh, that means so much. Oh, it rubbed off the screen when I touched it. Could you sign it again?

[C]

Anything to help, I suppose.

[A]

You're the best.

[B]

Get more than just savings. Get more with Geico.

[C]

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[B]

Oh, that's Noah's song. There we go. We. We knew asap Noah was on the case.

[C]

Oh, God. What? What do you want? I don't. Can we talk about this when I'm not. How do you say the girl's name is Chappelle Rowan.

[B]

Chapel. Rowan. The young people will get us together every time, won't they?

[C]

So what? Go, go.

[B]

What did she ask you for? That was just.

[C]

So she wear. Can she wear a skirt to school tomorrow?

[B]

Is it cold? Oh, my God. It's supposed to snow here. Yeah, it was like 60 degrees in D.C. today.

[C]

And I'd be trying to tell this. I'm like, it's February. Like, what is your. Why, like, why are you so pressed? It's not snow here, but it is cold. That's all right. Because I'm like, what? Close the damn door.

[B]

Y'.

[C]

All. Oh, my God.

[B]

Check on your parent friend. Check on your mom friend. Okay? They're going through. Okay. They're going through so much because, like.

[C]

I told you a week or several ago, I don't know that, you know, we're all trying to keep our heads right now, but then, like, we're trying to keep our heads with Duck. I swear to God, Noah.

[B]

What is she. She's absolutely trolling Jay in this moment. She's absolutely doing this because Jade is this upset.

[C]

I know. And it's my fault for reacting. It's my fault. And then I, you know, we're. We're trying to be gentle, but I'm also, like, trying to be realistic. And I'm like, I'll pinch your little butt. Budding nipples. Like, get out of my face.

[B]

My God.

[C]

Get away. But yes, I did see those two. I saw those two children on the Runway. Disrespect. This is for the cooling you. And then I saw. Was it Michael who got one online, and he was very upset. Was it Michael from. From. From Boys to Men?

[B]

I believe so.

[C]

Yes. With his long earthworm. Jim got online and he was very upset.

[B]

He was like, baby, I'm sorry. Please forgive me, Michael. What is just mumbling. Please.

[C]

Why is this three slides of you like you were. You took that very personally to check.

[B]

We gotta grow up.

[C]

Okay. We do. We won't. We won't ever grow up. Shout out to Dochi. I mean, she just makes me.

[B]

Yes.

[C]

Genuinely, genuinely happy to my core.

[B]

Oh, same, same, same, same, same. She's such a refreshing. She's a refreshing departure from like the status quo in all of the right ways. And I just appreciate everything that she st stands for.

[C]

Yes.

[B]

And just who she is. I'm proud of her. I'm just so proud of her. So congratulations to her and all of the winners. Absolutely. We've waited a long time. I mean, petty one, petty one. Because Kendrick Lamar, you know, my short.

[C]

King, makes me so happy.

[B]

I mean, all of us, down to the petty peeves, should have been standing to our feet in applause because, yeah, we've waited a long time for this. We have waited a long time.

[C]

Also, you know, I really love the fact because I feel like his speech just not just in shouting out the neighborhoods that, that raised him, but also it was an extra layer of petty, maybe unintentionally so, although I don't believe he does anything unintentionally on it to show correct that these are the neighborhoods that I know. These are the streets that I know. This is what raised me. This is where I was perusing. This is where I was, I was hemming and hawing and shaking and, and all kinds of things through these neighborhoods. And you, you don't know nothing about this. You know about we hoe. You don't know nothing about this culture. You don't know nothing about what it is to be raised and rooted. And so I, I just, I, I just love him and I'm. And I love Dochi. Dochi just really has a special place in my heart and I root for her. And listen, I want to have a. We're gonna have a conversation, but I also am happy for Beyonce. Like, I'm very happy for Beyonce. She been waiting. I mean, she been deserving of it.

[B]

You know, record breaking number of Grammy wins and, and she, she's waited a long time to win the Grammys that she won this year. And I think that she is more than deserving.

[C]

Cowboy Carter, more deserved is a great piece of work. Like a very incredible piece of work.

[B]

And solid body of work. Solid.

[C]

I still stand by everything I've always said. Howsomever. I, I will never deny her talent. I will never deny her work ethic. She Is incredible at what she does. Now. I will say this because I think it warrants a conversation. I felt so many complicated ways when the tour was announced. A. I was like, you know, the day before your period, when it is about to come at any moment, and you are in a fiery rage of hell at everything. That was me when it. So when it was announced, I. It was the day before my period. And so I was like, this is going to be amazing. Why would she announce a tour right.

[B]

Now and having such dissonance?

[C]

I was.

[B]

I mean, full on conflict in your body.

[C]

I was. I was swinging from the chandelier with gasoline and a lighter. And it was because, whoa, I'm it. It's because of it. All of the things that I say, they stand. I think that she's great, and I know it's going to be an incredible show. And I also can't get my mind off the fact that Berries are about to be $50 a pound, and. And all of the imported goods out of Canada and Mexico and Colombia and Venezuela and all kinds of places where we get very. I can't pay $25 for an avocado. And that is what it's getting ready to be. And I'm like, in the height of tariffs, in the height of all of this. I just hate the timing of this. I'm going to be honest with you. But I also am not one of those people that's like, I hate Beyonce because I think that's also stupid. I love Beyonce. I hate the timing of this. I am critical of the timing of this because I just find it to be not. Not an amazing. Not an amazing time to be dropping concert tickets.

[B]

That's fair. I. I think, you know, there's lots of. There's lots of things to sort of parse through here.

[C]

Absolutely.

[B]

I will say for me, I hear all of that. All of that stands. I think there's so much uncertainty and so much that we don't know.

[C]

I'm sure it's hard.

[B]

It's hard to. For me, I'll say it like this, given the 12 years of January that we just survived.

[C]

Christ Almighty, 65 days. Days of January.

[B]

I. I have to be honest, sister.

[C]

40 acres.

[B]

I chose Joy. I chose to say, listen, if this is something that I can look forward to, if I can. And all. All the things that you said being true and all those things.

[C]

I think all of these things. I think all of these things are valid and true, though.

[B]

I. To me, it just felt like coming into Black history month. It Felt like. And it could just be a figment of my imagination, but it felt like, thank you. It was a bit of a relief. It felt like, okay, all right. And if everything else goes to shit, at least. And, I mean, I don't know what the future holds. My, My. You know, my aim is to be. To be wise. And literally, I was praying last night, like, lord, I don't know. But, you know, help me to be.

[C]

A good steward of what you've given me.

[B]

Help me to be responsible, to make good choices. And all I can do is wait and see what the ticket sales are given and what my pockets are saying at the time. That's all I can do.

[C]

I think that is fair.

[B]

And listen, all I can do.

[C]

I can't hold somebody accountable for how people spend their money. Right. Howsomever?

[B]

Right.

[C]

Like, I. I feel many ways, and I want that to be very clear because I agree. I agree with you. I think there is a point of view where a choice of joy is very necessary, especially now. Right. And everybody's going to. Going to tunnel that. I mean, we're going to channel that however they see fit for them. Right. I'm not gonna say that I'm not gonna be at the show. I might be at the show if the tickets are reasonable. I also feel I'm like, okay, if this is a time when we need joy right now, maybe. Maybe you have done this digitally where, like, the people. People are not coming out of their. Trying to figure out how to balance between rent and how to see this thing because they're so drawn to you because you are such a force. And so I, you know, it's.

[B]

I. Yeah.

[C]

And I don't know the ins and outs. Yes. These people have been paid. You don't know if the contracts have been put. Yeah, I. I know that there's many variables. I just wanted to be honest about all of the various things I felt, because I also was like, I love the messaging in Cowboy Carter. I know the visuals are going to be incredible. I saw what she did with Renaissance. And then, of course, you know, the other side of me was like, please don't make niggas wear silver Ghana in the ocean.

[B]

No, no. All of these things. But this is the complexity of sort of humanity where we are.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

And our humanity. You're right. And I think, you know, all. I just. We just have to take it one thing at a time. And I think it's fair for. And this is a safe space where we can sort of talk about these things and say, these things out loud. But I want to believe. And this is not on some just sort of blind allegiance, okay, Because I'm grown and I'm. And I'm aware, and I understand sort of the ideologies and all the systems that are at play play here. But there is a part of me that recognizes or believes. I'll say this way. There's a part of me that believes that Beyonce is aware of her platform and who she is. And I think that. That her influence is undeniable in a way. And I think that there is power there that can be leveraged. And I'm waiting to see, and I'm hopeful that she will leverage that power in a way that benefits our communities. And so I don't want to put the cart before the horse. I think you're fair to sort of call out the things that, you know, points. You know, the things that are concerning, the things that don't seem like they add up. I think you're all fair and well and good and right, but I feel like, you know, we don't have all the variables yet.

[C]

You're not wrong about that.

[B]

And I'm hopeful that, you know, and, you know, when we have more information, we can make informed decisions. And that's just sort of where the space I'm operating in. But, you know, just after being inundated with all manner of bad news and, you know, it felt like just a crack in the window, a little glimmer of sunlight on an otherwise damning opening to the year, and so I'm just going to wait and see. I'm trying not to get my hopes up too high, but, you know, just holding all things constant in all things being considered at one time. But I'm sure. I'm glad you said, you know, I'm glad you raised. Because I don't think that you're alone. You're not alone. I share a lot of the same concerns that you share, and I think.

[C]

And I think it's okay to feel multiple ways, right? Because if this were for sure, like I said, I. I really enjoy Beyonce. And if this were a friend, right, if this was somebody I knew, I'd be like, hey, sister, so have you considered these things? And they have every right to say, yes, I have. And I'm still gonna do it my way. And I'd be like, yes, blue eyes, please. Do you know what I'm saying? Do it your way. Like, I would, but I. It. It. It would still be a conversation I would have. Just, you know, and I think it's okay for us to feel multiple ways about things. It's okay to find joy and also feel a little bit of, like you said, a little bit of dissonance too. Some of some. That is, these are very honest and human feelings. So that's another reason why I wanted to, I wanted to share them with you and with our platform because I was like, I don't know who this will resonate with and I'm sure somebody will be like, ah, take that stick out of your ass and, and blackbird, and that's fine.

[B]

And I, I, I'm hopeful that the safe space that Renaissance was for us.

[C]

That's also, and I think that's a fair point. And also, like I said, a lot of the messaging in Cowboy Carter, you know, the, the, the thought that it invokes to people to go and kind of do their own research and look up, you know, the, the black cow, the history of black cowboys and so forth and so on. Like, I think all of that can exist and these complicated feelings can exist and we can still be joyful and still have productive conversation, you know, because our society is crumbling around us. But has it, it, has it not.

[B]

Always been that's true.

[C]

You know that's true. Has it not always been that's true. You know, I want, I want you all to know, I, again, I am not giving up on the news. The genocide is still going in, in ways. There are still people being targeted, but there are also a lot. There's joy in that too, right? This is very complicated because there are still people being targeted unjustly with a ceasefire being called. But also there you, there are beautiful videos of people returning to their homes and you feel the complicated feelings of feeling so grateful to watch somebody get to touch their home again. But then also the sadness that this is not the home that they left. You know, a lot of it is just land, a lot of it is rubble. You know, sometimes they're returning in their homes, have no walls, but they're so grateful to just be able to touch that ground. And so that's part of, I think all of these complicated human feelings are part of the human experience you even have. And I don't want to be bringing him up on this show, but, you know, it's not over because you got this idiot advocating for Palestinians to find new pieces of land, you know, and saying it in a way, it's like, oh, well, they don't want to return to this anyway. It's a demolition ground. We know what your ultimate objectives have always been. And you all are filled with hate. So there's still so much work to do. But we can still look at those, those gleams of. Of light that you were talking about and those glimmers of light and kind of lean into those when we need them. The same with Sudan. Sudan is the. The civilians of Sudan are especially in Nyala and El Fishir are being plummeted right now by the rsf. I mean, it is so much massacre, it is so much devastation. It's ramped up exponentially. Please remember that we have links in the description box and wherever you're listening in the link tree on the social media and so forth where you can look and find your not just ways to donate, but also dig into your own, your own way of learning and consuming that information at your own will. I thought there might be a little revamp in how we do that. There will be links to. Also to the. The war with. Between Rwanda and the Congo, because that's information that we want to also keep our eyes on Haiti. So please make sure that you check out those resources and links. They are provided for you. Like I said in the description box or wherever you are listening. And I hope we can all find our glimmers of light. Cuz we need them. We need them right now. But we'll talk about that more actually in our kitchen table. So shall we head on over there, Sis?

[B]

Let's do it.

[A]

Oh, Gekko, I just love being able to file a claim in under two minutes with the Geico app. Could you sign it?

[C]

Sign what?

[B]

The app. Yeah, sure.

[A]

Oh, it rubbed off the screen when I touched it. Could you sign it again?

[C]

Anything to help, I suppose.

[B]

Get more than just savings. Get more with Geico.

[A]

Hey, hate to do this. Could we reschedule our morning hike? I was just about to ask the same next week. Yes, it's Dunkin Original blend time.

[B]

Staying at home with Duncan. Don't mind if I do.

[C]

The home with Dunkin is where you want to be.

[B]

So at the kitchen table today, like I said, We've survived 12 years of January. And I will say for me, I don't feel like I had time or bandwidth or capacity. And my therapist called it out for me. She was like, what are your goals for 2025? I was like, girl, I don't know, girl. What? I'm just trying to live. So she was like, okay, to survive let. Yeah, I'm like, just, you know, survive is what I would like to do. And so she encouraged me to think intentionally about some of the things that I want to accomplish and do in the new year. And I've been seeing a trend floating around the socials. Instead of vision boards or smart goals, things that, you know, age old sort of tried and true ways of thinking about making goals for the, for the new year. The newest, I think, craze is making a bingo card. And there's been lots of cool videos on all kinds of YouTube down through the apps, honey, the girls are talking about. Okay, we've made our bingo card for the year. And so I thought it would be cool for Jade and I to make bingo cards and then talk here at the kitchen table about some of the things that we'd like to see do, accomplish, not do any. Anything, nothing personal, professional, any sort of intentions or things that you want to pursue, habits you want to cultivate, habits you want to break. Just as you think about the. The year, you know, what comes to mind in terms of, you know, things that, you know a lot. I think all the uncertainty that's coming, you know, let's have a plan. Like, you know, given all the uncertainty, what are some of the things we want to work on doing? And so we decided to share our bingo cards and sis kick us off, like, let's go through your list and then we'll talk about what informed your list and all that kind of stuff. So talk. So just give me the highs and lows. Okay, show me what's on your bingo card.

[C]

Let's see. So you want me to go through the whole thing or you want me to do a. What? You want a ping pong? How you want to do this?

[B]

Well, we can ping pong.

[C]

All right. B32. So the first one on my bingo card is to go outside at least once a day.

[B]

Yay.

[C]

Because I can look up and I do go outside once a day because I take Noah to school, but school, then I come right back and, you know, do the things that I need to do here. And so I'm like, you know, maybe I. I find some intentional, like 30 minutes to just be in the sun and soak that some actual vitamin D, not in pill form, and be outside at least once a day. And I think that's going to help, you know, with my mood and.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

And just actually, you know, motivation, because there's something about being outside and then you go in, like, then you feel motivated to kind of keep going with your day. So.

[B]

Yes. Yes, I think it's making a difference. I will say for me, we are, We. We are inching back into the office. And I can say that while I'm not enthused, while I don't love it, there are things that I'm starting to appreciate about it in that, you know, I feel like, you know, the routine, you know, it feels. You know, it does feel like riding a bike. You know, this is something. And I can't believe.

[C]

But we used to do this every.

[B]

Day in terms of, like, and going into a different building to do our work.

[C]

Yep.

[B]

But, yeah, I am appreciating that being outside and just sort of having fresh air does make a difference.

[C]

It does. It does.

[B]

Similarly, I. I have added a step goal to my bingo card because I think to this point of sort of being outside in being inside, I have become so much more sedentary than I used to be. And I have been intentionally paying attention to my step count because, you know, I've been training for over a year, and it's just like, wow, you know, when you move your body more, like, strength training is great, but there's so much more to sort of health than, you know, just picking up heavy things and putting them down.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

It is about how much you are moving your body out the day. Exactly. Moving your body more throughout the day, more consistent. So I'm aiming for 8 to 10k steps a day. And I remember when that felt like I used to easily hit 10k, like, no stress Covid happened. And then my steps went from, like, 10,000 to, like, 2500. And so that's a pretty drastic jump. And so I'm just trying to get back in the flow of regular movement and consistent movement throughout the day. So, yeah, I want to be even more consistent in 2025 and being intentional about, at minimum, whether it is cardio or not. Just having more movement.

[C]

Yep.

[B]

Throughout the day.

[C]

Yep. I. Similarly, next to my bingo card is a daily workout because I did use.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

My walks. I have told myself on many occasions, I have told you, I'm gonna go to this pilates studio. I'm gonna do. I've done none of that. I've done none of it. And I made a promise to myself that I was gonna get on that walking pad and get on that stair thing and pull them kettlebells out of the closet.

[B]

And, yeah.

[C]

I was like, because you. I feel the stiffening. I feel it happening. And if I don't do it now, I'm not going to do it, so I've got to do it now. And so I'm. I'm making a promise to myself to make sure that I do at least an hour of workout a day where I'm moving my body in some way. What you got? What's next?

[B]

I have daily prayer journal time.

[C]

Just.

[B]

As sort of like, you know, I do it regularly, but I don't do it daily. I pray all day long, just sort of like, in my spirit, like I was talking about earlier. But I do see and feel a difference when I designate time to sort of sit and be intentional about my prayer and reflection and talking to God. And so I want to build a muscle to where I'm. It is just sort of like my regular practice to do it daily. It used to be, but I need to get back to that, or I would like to get back to that. And so that is definitely on the list.

[C]

Give me another reading, like, on a daily basis. So I was, like, on top of, like, screens. Literally just melting our brains in ways that we don't understand.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

And then also not understanding the effects of COVID and what that may have done to us. And. And. And not just having Covid, but the time period and everything. I want to make sure that I'm trying to sharpen my brain and give it some exercise. So the same way that I want to give my body some daily movement, I want to give my brain some daily movement. And so part of that is I want to. I want to make sure that I'm intentionally implementing, like, reading time into my day, preferably a couple of times a day, but definitely on a daily basis, I want to do some reading. And another reason for that, too, is, you know, our kids live in the age of screens. And as much as we try to mitigate and, you know, make sure that she's got activities and, like, we're very intentional about her screen time, there's still aspects to it that are just a part of the generation. And if she sees me with physical books in my hands, where she. It's. It becomes like an intentional. My mom has her reading time every day. I hope that that. That is something that she will also continue on with, because we've been really intentional with her with reading on a nightly basis. And, like, now that she's, you know, going into taking herself to bed, making sure that she. Their screens are. There's a tub where you put all of that in there and you do some reading to wind yourself down at night. So, you know, it's. It's for multiple reasons, but I want to make sure that reading is a daily. A daily activity for me. And reading a book, an actual book, not a Screen, Not a screen. What you got?

[B]

Love that. I would like to have in person time with my friends at least once a month.

[C]

Important.

[B]

Yeah, like, you know, not. And it doesn't always have to be the same friend group. I mean, ideally I can sort of do it with all of my friends, but with work, travel, it is hard for me to. It's easy for me to sacrifice community or social engagement just because I'm running here and there and anytime where I'm not having to sort of socialize or engage at work. I really do value sort of the time to refuel my battery and my alone time. I now. And as we've been saying on the show and just generally in our practice community, now more than ever is what's going to be the thing that sustains us and keeps us.

[C]

We can't afford to give that up right now.

[B]

So I want to be more intentional. I'm excited about, you know, coming to New York for the read in a couple of weeks. And yes, you know, I'm also getting together with Leonard and Felicia at the end of the month. We're doing our little, our little, you know, we check in our. It's our, it's our biannual check in on our sort of professional goals and accountabilities, things that we want to accomplish that's more germane to sort of work and career. We hold ourselves. We have our little accountability retreat. So we're going to get together at Leonard's in, in Indiana at the end of the month. So, you know, I want to be intentional about scheduling that time. I'm supposed to have dinner with Dr. Freeze Bread, you know, little things just to make sure that I am. I am checking in and spending quality time with my people.

[C]

Yes, absolutely.

[B]

And I want to make sure that I, at minimum do it once per month, but hopefully more than that. But that I didn't want to, you know, wanting to.

[C]

The, the. We're fostering a community right now where isolation is easy. Like you said, like, yeah, easy to fall into between being distracted with our daily routines, what the things that we have to do, whether that be work or whatever. And I'm also finding, you know, with the news and consuming too much of the news that you, you get bogged down to the point where you're like, I'm sad and I don't feel. Feel like talking. And that is exactly what they want.

[B]

Like, I.

[C]

There's many days I've been feeling over the past few months where I'm like, yo, I just don't Even want to. Like, I don't even have it for a conversation with anybody. And that is not. We can't afford to be there right now, and they can't put a tariff on community, so period. I, I love that you said that, because that is something that we have to be really intentional about in multiple aspects. I actually put on here that I want to be intentional about joy in particular and being present. So making sure that with us living in a batting cage of, of, of disheartening information, that I am intentionally seeking things that are going to find me some avenue of joy for the day, and making sure that I'm setting that example for Noah. Like, I want her to understand that it's okay to be sad and to be bogged down, but I don't want that to be my only way of being. And I'm like, you know, I'm not a sad person, but I've been sad. So I'm like, I, I have to, I have to make sure that I am finding ways on a daily basis to seek some level of joy. And I'm not talking about fake dopamine joy. I'm not talking about scrolling or, or even binge watching a show all the time. Like, finding things that are going to bring me a true laugh or a true smile. Things that are gonna make my heart warm, you know what I'm saying? And being, and being present to be able to accept those things in those moments, because that's another thing that we have to hold on to right now. I can't let these people take away the fact that I have always been a joyful person. And I'm like, I gotta still be a joyful person even in the midst of all of this. You know what I'm saying? Slaves had fun too, you know? So, yeah, I'd say on a daily basis. On a daily basis. So I'm like, no, find, find those pockets of joy. And we are joyful people. You know, we can find the joy literally in anything. And I, I, I have allowed that to be zapped for a little while now. Yeah, I'm actually tired of being sad. I'm tired of. So I wanna, I wanna make sure that I'm seeking that out and that I'm being present to be able to receive that.

[B]

Yes. That's why we playing bingo.

[C]

Okay. That's right. Yeah. In 31. Okay.

[B]

What you got in 31? Okay, I'm gonna combine a couple because there are several on here that are writing related. Okay. Speaking of joy. Okay, Speaking of joy and Just reconnecting to the things that come naturally to us, the things that we enjoy doing. I have allowed, you know, we, our society, everyone's a producer of content in some way. I think that makes us all. And I think that fosters a lot of comparison. That fosters a lot of just sort of like, you know, for me, like self doubt or, you know, I want to. I don't want to do anything because anybody else is doing it. And so like, when other people are doing a thing, I. I find myself being like, well, I don't want to do it. I don't want to do it because all the girls are doing it. But the truth of the matter is writing has always been. That's why I write in a prayer journal. Writing has always been something that sort of steadies me, sort of grounds me. Over the years, I have found, and this feels weird to say, but it's true. I have found relationship in words. I have. It is something that means a lot to me, how I express myself. And I feel like a lot of my thinking and just my processing is facilitated through writing. And so I want to reconnect to that part of me. And there's writing that happens for me, and then there's writing for public consumption. And I can admit that I used to shoot my shot a lot more in terms of sharing my writing, seeking publication in different forms. And I have sort of allowed myself to doubt and worry about, you know, whether it was good enough or whether it was like somebody else was doing it or whether it would be compared or, you know, all just too consumed with what others might feel or how they might react to it and just sort of lost the joy that comes from me just doing it. For me, whether or not one person reads it or a million people read it, I wrote this for me. I want to get back to that. And so I've been thinking about that in a lot of different ways. And there's a lot of ideas that I have. I want to write a book. And I've enrolled in sort of like some book writing workshops and in thinking about sort of how to give birth to an idea and a plan and launch that into something. So that's on here. I've also wanted to think about a substack. I think substack is one of the platforms where there's rational, critical, quality thinking happening. And so I think there's lots of good discourse and conversation happening on substack. And substack has become a space where people are just sort of writing and sharing Whether creatively, inspirationally, or, you know, in terms of just keeping in. Keep keeping us informed newsletters. And I don't really know what the sub stack will look like, but I. I do feel like that's something that feels like I might like doing something like that. So those, those two, you know, the completing my book writing workshop and then maybe launching a sub stack of some sort that makes sense for you.

[C]

There needs to be a place where people are able to go and read your writings. And, and like you said, that's your passion, that's your love. That's what you. That's what you do. And, and nobody's writing looks like anybody else's unless it's AI, you know what I mean? Like, nobody's writing looks like anybody else's. And I think the, the beauty is that we don't read Audre Lorde or, or read Octavia Butler or, or read Zora Neale Hurston or, or Nikki Giovanni or read all. And these are all different styles of writing. We don't read those and say, but Octavia Butler said this, but I wonder if she was looking over here and seeing was ordinal Hearst, you know what I'm saying? So, like, it's more of. They use. When they reference each other, they reference each other in. In motivation. You know what I'm saying? And so I think there is such a lane for you to, to put your work out there so that people can enjoy what you do and what you're actually passionate about. I love that.

[B]

We'll see. I'm gonna be typing Fast again. Oh, that's also on here. I'm gonna revive Team Typing Fast. Yeah, I want to, because, you know, I have. My relationship to work and working and Purpose has evolved a bit since Team Typing Fast in its original conception. And so I've been thinking a lot about what that means for the community. One thing that will never change is that it will always be a community. And so that's what I wanted to be. And so we're thinking a lot about what it will look like in this iteration. So that's definitely something that's going to come out of Team Typing Fast. And it's related to sort of writing and working passion. So. Yes, absolutely. Soon come.

[C]

Absolutely. I am going to really start my dinner series.

[B]

Yeah, Dinner series.

[C]

You know, I've been needing to do some things for a while, and I've been pushed and motivated by loved ones to do so. And so I'm going to start a session Sunday, dinner. I. I want to be Very intentional about the work that I'm doing. And with all of these DEI initiatives being cut, which means, you know, all of the different programming and things that we've done over the years being cut, I have to pivot. And I, that's another reason why I have been in a hole just trying to figure out like, what does that pivot look like? And I'm realizing I'm like, it's going to look like many things. And so. But we can't, we can't just sit here. Like, we have to, we have to start to execute some of those things. And that, that's how you pivot. Like, you don't pivot by staying still. So part of that is my Sunday dinner series. It's also completing the first draft of my cookbook, you know what I'm saying? And being very intentional about like my recipe testing, you know, so I've been working on that quite a bit and I want that to be a consistent thing for all of the year. Yeah. And I, and it's interesting because as soon as you like, I started speaking and saying like, all right, we got to get out of this hole. And I have to be intentional about what I'm looking for. But I also, even in this tight financial time, even with inflation, even with all of these things, even with so much of my income being cut, I don't want to give up the integrity of the thing things that I'm doing. Like, I want them to be in alignment with what feels good. And with that, I got hit up by this young black farmer in Wisconsin. And I'm going to do a cooking demonstration with some black families and some families in Wisconsin, you know what I'm saying?

[B]

Like, oh, that's dope.

[C]

Then a school hit me up and was like, we want you to come through and do a cooking demo with our people. And, and they have farmland. And I'm like, you know, I'm getting messages. So those are some things that I really want to continue to work on for this year. What else you got on there? Hey, what's up, subscribers? Welcome back to the channel. So which variety of Dunkin at Home.

[B]

Coffee is your fave?

[C]

Original blend?

[B]

French vanilla or hazelnut? Drop a comment.

[A]

What are you.

[C]

Oh, this is what I do when I'm home alone.

[A]

Drink Dunkin Original blend or pretend your an influencer?

[C]

Both.

[B]

Want a cup?

[C]

Hey, let's do a taste test for the audience.

[B]

Okay, how's this?

[A]

The rich, smooth taste of Dunkin at home is unmatched.

[C]

Nice. You're a Natural, the home with Dunkin's.

[B]

Where you want to be.

[A]

Thanks for selling your car to Carvana. Here's your check.

[B]

Whoa. When did I get here?

[A]

What do you mean?

[B]

I swear it was just moments ago that I accepted a great offer from Carvana online. I must have time traveled to the future.

[A]

It was just moments ago. We do same day pickup. Here's your check for that great offer.

[C]

It is the future.

[B]

It's.

[C]

It's the present.

[A]

And just the convenience of Carvana. Sorry to blow your mind.

[C]

It's all good.

[B]

Happens all the time.

[A]

Sell your car the convenient way to Carvana. Pick up. Times may vary and fees may apply.

[B]

Well, similarly, one thing that I do have on my bingo card is, you know, we have talked at length and we said it all. 20, 24 and life, life. But getting back to in person, getting grown experiences, I have that on mine too. I said I want to do a minimum. Well, I say one to three, but that's a minimum for me. So I would like, ideally like to do a bit more than that. But you know, just sort of giving us some Runway to sort of really plan something out. Because Jade and I have been sort of talking about sort of breathing some new life and energy into a getting grown live because we wanted to sort of grow beyond us, just sort of sitting on a stage and talking, but really inviting you all to the kitchen table.

[C]

Yes.

[B]

And how we might do that in real time. And so I know that we've been promising, but we are really in the lab thinking about how best to do this. So that is definitely on my bingo card. In person, getting grown events.

[C]

Yes.

[B]

Because that is also another. This is our community and we have to come together. And so that is something that I am very, very passionate about fulfilling in 2025.

[C]

Yes. Let's see here. I have, I definitely, you know, I've talked about it, but I'm being real intentional about trying to create this consistent bedtime routine, this healthy. Bedtime. Yeah, that's on the list. Printing photos.

[B]

Oh, yes.

[C]

Getting back to printing photos, putting them in frames and having them like, I want an auntie house. You know what I'm saying? I want you to come in. And I already have. I'm like, I'm almost there. I. You come up here and it's a whole lot of rattan and plants. And I'm like, let's complete this with photographs on the wall and frames.

[B]

I. When I went to my grandfather's house this past week. I know. So at work and I, I talked, I Talked. I talked trash about it a little bit on threads, but, you know, like, I was asked to bring a cultural artifact and it was like, oh, God, right. You know, it was just like, you.

[C]

Were asked to bring a cultural artifact.

[B]

Where to? We had like a retreat at work. And there was one session that we were doing work. External consultant. And they were, oh, and ice. Bringing a cultural artifact. It was, it felt like. It's like. It did. It didn't. It doesn't feel like an icebreaker because these are the people that I work with every day. So it's not like I don't know them. But in fairness, we ended up doing it in a different way and it actually ended up being super good in terms of that.

[C]

I see that being lovely.

[B]

Yeah. Cause it was like, because of sort of where we are. And for me, like, you know, I will tell y', all, like I said in the room, this time has been particularly hard for me because I feel gaslit hearing all of this narrative and rhetoric around waste. And the suggestion that black people don't work or don't work hard enough or that we need to earn things has been particularly mind numbing. It's like enraging for me because everybody that I know worked and I feel like, you know, what kind of terrorist do you have to be, you know what I'm saying, to suggest that the people that cleaned your houses and raised your kids and cook your meals don't work hard enough. The people who do the work that you refuse to do don't work hard enough. And so I was able to, because.

[C]

Aren'T you some sons in Tanzania shooting giraffes while we are washing dishes and like carrying pots and writing grants?

[B]

You know, I just like, you know, my grandparents, like my mother's, my grandmother, cleaned white folks houses and worked.

[C]

In fact, mine too.

[B]

My grandfather, my grandfather had to stop going to school at 16 because his brothers were fighting the Korean War. And he was the eldest male child left to re. To generate income for his mother and grandmother. And so from 16 until he was 80 something, he worked to provide for his family. And he works so that I might go to school longer than anybody has in my family so that I might work. You know what I'm saying? But to hear these people suggest that, you know, all of this, like, oh, these kids need to earn it, they don't earn it. You know, telling kids that you, you're taking away their reduced lunch programs and saying that I, that they need to work, like that pissed me off.

[C]

Are you like, do you want these niggas to go back to factories making clothes in the middle of the day? Like, what is it that you're looking for? My. I'm watching my. My father is 60, 61 year, 62 years old right now, and he's done floors. He. He djed and he. And he laid floors. And now he's trying to. Nobody wants a 60 something year old DJ, first of all. And then second of all, he doesn't. He can't lay floors like that anymore where he's down on his knees. A lot of manual labor. It's so hard on his body. And I'm watching him literally trying to pivot as 60 something years old because he always worked for himself. He didn't work a job where he got a pension or a retirement or a 401k and he's 60 something years old trying to pivot. And you all want to talk about people not working. I've had a job since I was 11. That is not an exaggeration.

[B]

Not for. No, seriously. And so the photos, when I was at my grandfather's house, just looking through things to try to figure out what kind of artifact I could bring. It was just so. So. No, no, it was not. No, the tangent was necessary, but it was so reassuring and reaffirming for me to remember that this is the stock that I come from. And no matter what these people are saying into these screens, you know, all over the place about who we are, we know who we are. We know who we are, we know where we come from, we know what we've done. And we have to work to not let them gaslight us out of what we know about ourselves. And so, like, I found these pictures of, you know, this was my UConn graduation.

[C]

Yes. Oh, I love his.

[B]

And you know, of course, you know, I found good pictures of Brian. That was from his high school, you know what I'm saying? And this was my grandma. This was one of her pictures. We found these older pictures and my grandma got them reprinted.

[C]

Come on, hair. Come on, beauticians.

[B]

So it's like, you know, this was. Yeah. So you write printing pictures because so much is in the phones. Like, but my grandfather got like, literally tubs of photos from the years. And, you know, I'm like, we should sit down and organize these.

[C]

Yep.

[B]

Catalog them.

[C]

Yep.

[B]

And. And you know, that that's something that is, you know, I'm. I'm going to add to my bingo card. It's not on it right now, but I'm so glad that you said that because we cannot lose these things. They needs to be archived.

[C]

Yep.

[B]

I stole these. Don't tell Di, but I took these home with me.

[C]

I mean, what it. First of all, that is what we're supposed to do.

[B]

I told my grand. I told mommy. I was like, I want this. And my mom was like, take a picture of it. And on foot was like, put it in your purse.

[C]

Just take the picture because what are they about to do with it?

[B]

She was like, he's not going to know that you have it.

[C]

I have a giant. My grandparents, when my nana passed away in 2020, everybody sent me the physical pictures for. To make the. The program and do all. And make the montage and do all of that stuff. So I have all of the pictures. I have. My nana was a dancer, my grandmother was a dancer, and her sisters, they were all professional dancers. And so I have all their dance photos. I. I have beautiful, you know, them in all of their, like 50s and 60s gear. And then I also have my mom, my grandmother, you know, my girl, girl. I have the book that she wrote that I told you about before. So, like all that stuff, I moved into that Ben, I was telling you to take in the case of an emergency, but I said, you know, yeah, we. We have to be really intentional about printing the pictures that are in our phone and like looking at them. Don't let them sit and boxes. Put them on walls, Put them in something. Put them on coffee tables again. So when people come over, they got pictures to look at. Like, there's traditions I don't want to lose, which is why I want to call my. My series Sunday Dinner. Because I. I'm like, these are traditions that cannot be lost. No matter what happens in this world, they can't be.

[B]

You're right. Is that so? Yes. Agreed. Your Sunday dinner series, is that in person? Is that content?

[C]

Yes.

[B]

Tell us what you're thinking. Okay.

[C]

Thinking in person. Sunday dinner, like where we sit down and have Sunday dinner family style. And I'm bring. You know, there's many. This many times. I don't know. I think every person who can't cook was told they should open a soul food restaurant. And I don't want to open a soul food restaurant. But I do want you to have, like, I want you to have greens that are washed properly and they're seasoned down and they're what they should be. I want you to have creamy, delicious, but black eyed peas. I want you to have some juicy, tender chick. Like, I want us to have Sunday dinner that you would have at your aunt's house, but a spread of it and fellowshipping in community and I want to bring that, you know, to the masses in some, in some way. So I'm speaking that. I don't know exactly what that's going to look like, but that's what I'm working on.

[B]

Love it.

[C]

And so that's really important for me. The Getting grown events. XD and I have been figuring out what we want that to look like, you know, like we gotta. So these, these traditions and things are, are things that I've been thinking about where I'm like, well, first of all, I gotta stick around. Like I have to be your cranky old auntie who smokes the funny smelling cigarettes because I have to keep some of these traditions up to make sure that you niggas carry them on as long as this earth will have us. So, you know, these are important. I want to make sure I'm dancing this year. I want to be intentional about dancing. I'm like, you know, I used to love dancing and not because I could, but just because it was fun. We'd go to the club, we had fun. We'd go to parties, we had fun. We go to house parties, we had fun. And so, and like when, when, you know, I get with the girls here, you know, when we go to the block parties or whatever, like we have moments where we dance and you, you don't realize how much you need that. What a. How much that releases from you. You know what I'm saying? Like, we are supposed to be moving our hips. That is a part of how we heal. That is where we store. So like I'm like dance and hula hoop and do this archery so you can learn how to like again, perch like a gargoyle. When the time comes and y' all start wilding, I'm gonna be a ping.

[B]

Pinging.

[C]

Okay, so I. My archery, my flute. I gotta get back to my flute.

[B]

Oh my God, no.

[C]

J3000 in my overalls through the streets. Okay? Like I'm coming through like Ms. Frizzle with a flu.

[B]

I love it.

[C]

And my funny smelling cigarette.

[B]

Ms. Frizzle from Brooklyn.

[C]

Yeah. Hello, I'm Brooklyn. Bringing that to the. I want to bring juke joints back. So these are like I got. I want, I want joy and intention and, and resilience and rejuvenation. I want all of that in tradition. I want all of that to, to be at the forefront of everything that I do. Not just this year going forward, but this year I Want to be really intentional about honing into those things. Yeah. We want to hear your cards. We should post our bit. We're going to post our bingo cards on our Instagram page, y'.

[B]

All.

[C]

We'll have Kia's bingo card and we'll have my bingo card. You will see that we have an identical square one to three in person GG events. I stole that from Kia because she made the template because she's a black woman in tech. So, you know, I was like, yes, good job as me as well. So. But we will have those posted on our Instagram pages. We would love to hear some of what's on your bingo card. Chime in on the social. Chime in wherever you see fit. And I think about the ways that.

[B]

You want to have fun.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

Think about the things that will bring you joy. Think about the things that will restore you, that'll get you through. Yeah. Be intentional about prioritizing those things amidst all of the other things that you want to do. Don't let this, this year steal your joy or steal your hope for the future or steal you. Steal you or keep you from chasing your purpose. If there are things you want to do, things you want to accomplish, we can still work toward that, despite what these people is doing.

[C]

Let me tell you something. Don't let the sun go down on me. Don't let.

[B]

Don't let the sun.

[C]

Yes. Okay.

[B]

I know that you and I are singing that song. So listen, there's a gospel version of that song and there's.

[C]

Yes. By Elton John.

[B]

Yes, The Elton John version. And I knew instantly that we were two different versions, but the sentiment.

[C]

No, I'm singing the Elton John performs with the east side Choir version. So it's both.

[B]

Of course it is. So good. Don't let the sun go down on your bingo card.

[C]

No. That's what we're gonna call this episode. Don't let the sun go down on me. Okay.

[B]

Don't let the sun go down your bingo card. Bingo cards.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

Shall we. What are we self caring?

[C]

Shall we do? No, I think we self cared. I think this was a self care. Let's go on. Close this out.

[B]

Purr.

[A]

Hey, hate to do this. Could we reschedule our morning hike? I was just about to ask the same next week.

[C]

Yes.

[A]

It's Duncan original blend time.

[B]

Staying at home with Duncan. Don't mind if I do. The home with Duncan is where you want to be.

[C]

And I want to be very responsible of the things I say to my sister because everybody know I can Be real petty. PE to the tty, honey. Okay? It is time to wave the flag of petty. I think this my petty p. Is very petty. So the. You know, the girls are trying to. They're. They're trying to do everything we did when we were younger. And that's not. I. I find no fault in that. That is the circle of life. I've said that before.

[B]

That moves us all.

[C]

But you have to ask questions when you don't know what you're doing. I see that some of you are attempting to use hot combs again.

[B]

Who? Who? The young people.

[C]

Yeah, I've seen a couple of young people, you know, attempting to use hot combs. And I'm like, okay, cool. But they don't know what the hell they're doing. And while nobody has fried their hair yet, you know, they're doing nothing. It's a Miley Cyrus dance. Nothing is happening. I'm like, nobody's taught you how to gauge the temperature of the hot comb. Like, you don't know what you're doing. And I want you to stop right now because you're not asking questions to the people you all don't like. You're not about this life. Tell me right now, what is the Marcel iron? Exactly. You can't.

[B]

They don't know.

[C]

They don't know what that is. They don't know what it is to put a Marcel iron on a gas stove and watch somebody fling that around and wonder if it's one day going to accidentally fly out of their hands, even though it never actually does. And holding your ear down to make sure that they get every crevice, nook, and cranny of your scalp. Y' all don't know about that life. So please put the hot combs down. Go back to your Sailor Moon braids or whatever it is that you're doing, doing, and leave it to us. Or ask questions so that you can do it properly.

[B]

Who is doing this?

[C]

Young black girls? I don't know.

[B]

Oh, my gosh.

[C]

Oh, no.

[B]

Where are their moms? Where are their grandmothers?

[C]

Somewhere making tacos. I don't know.

[B]

Oh, goodness.

[C]

You know, sister, this is why I'm bringing back Sunday dinner.

[B]

That's what I'm saying. We are really down bad, y'. All.

[C]

We really.

[B]

We are really down bad. Like, there's certain tradition.

[C]

Like, if we're gonna do it, we, you know, do it, do it, do it, do it now. So ask questions when you don't know what you're doing, and if your mother doesn't know. And you just saw it on the Internet. Ask more Internet. There's a lot out there.

[B]

Ask me.

[C]

Hello? Hell, you can ask me. They'll be like, what do you know? There was a time. There was a time. Okay. Your girl.

[B]

I remember my grandma used to be rap. Have that. Those Marcels. And she used to check. Get her a paper towel.

[C]

A paper towel.

[B]

Hot.

[C]

Yes.

[B]

Oh.

[C]

Oh. There were many a late night when my mother would have the Marcel irons on the stove. She would have the rollers in our hair. You know what I'm saying? First, before the first day of school. You know what I'm saying? You're going to school, you're going to bed with some pink rollers in your hair. And you are sitting at the stove until probably 10pm like, there. This is. This is tradition. Are we still doing hair in the kitchen? No. Because everybody lives in an apartment, so. And not the good pre war kind anymore. I washed. No, I washed Noah's. I know. I. I grew up in kitchens and apartments, but they will have different sizes. I feel like apartments are built different now. Unless you're in a pre war, apartments are built different. You know what they're built for? Roommates. That's what they're all built for. They're all built for roommates. They want the world to be filled with yuppies in tech. And I don't know how they're gonna just keep. That's why I think everybody's clones.

[B]

What are we going to do, y'?

[C]

All Except Jamie Foxx. What's your petty.

[B]

My petty peeve. Okay, so y' all know this is. Listen, I have rheumatoid arthritis. We've talked about this on the show. If you have been on any of my Instagram lives recently, most especially the most recent one, you know that my hands sometimes don't cooperate. They don't let me be great, right? And I'll be trying to get them to, you know, But I. I am tired of buying things that I can't open. Like, I purchased the perfume and I can't get the top off. And I don't know, like, what to do. Like, I'm like, do I take it back to the store? Do I need to wait till somebody come to my house so they can take it off for me? Like, I don't understand what's happening. I'm like, google also, what the fuck.

[C]

Kind of top is this?

[B]

Otherwise I would show you. But I'm just like, why can't it come off? And people are going to say, that it's my nails or whatever. But listen, it's not. I'm telling you that, like, I'm not able to. To grip or maneuver my hands the way that my rheumatoid arthritis is set up. It really impacts my hands and my wrists, and in a lot of ways, I'm doing okay. And I. I don't have any complaints because given the amount of time that I have had this prognosis and I've been managing and I'm doing okay, like, I can. I can take care of myself, but there are just little things that continue to. You know, it reminds me that no matter how much progress I make in the gym or what, it's just like, man, like something very simple as far as opening a jar or taking the top off of a perfume is just.

[C]

Like, oh, so clearly a stupid design perfume at that.

[B]

But, yeah, I'll show you when we finish recording. I'll go downstairs so you can see. But it's just like, I. This morning, I was almost late. Like, it took, like, you know, I just thought, oh, I'll just take the top off and spray and keep going. But it took like, I. I thought I tussled with that thing for a solid seven minutes. Like, what an idiot. I can't open it. I can't open it. But, yeah, that's my petty peeve sometimes. As. As much as I'm grateful and I am, you know, still confident that I will continue to be kept and can continue to take care of myself, there are small. There are small things that you know about having this chronic condition, and I just wish my hands would work like everybody else's. I do.

[C]

I understand. I understand. Well, if it makes you feel better, I got hands.

[B]

So what does that mean?

[C]

Like, you know, they banged up. I. I banged my knuckle into a pot the other day. Now it's got a. A permanent gash scar. I told you, I rolled out of my dad's car in third grade. I still got the scars from that. Rolled like a possum down, like, just rolled out of that car. Do you hear me?

[B]

Good.

[C]

No, not good. Or picture day? It's crazy.

[B]

Yes.

[C]

Man, the 90s. It was the 90s. But, yeah, but no, I get. I feel you. And I. I send you lots of love.

[B]

Thank you, sister.

[C]

I send you in your hands. Lots of love. Your jazz hands. That's what we'll call him. Jazz hands. And with that, ladies and gentlemen and everybody, royalty in between, thank you so much for listening to another episode of Getting Grown. We Got to play bingo. Awesome. Guests coming. Make sure you all are responding and telling telling us some of the things that are on your bingo cards. Matter of fact, make sure you're sending emails to hello getting grown co and we'll read some of your bingo card love dots. I was gonna say bullet points, but we'll read some of your bingo cards to submission. So send that to hello getting grown co. Don't forget to send in your honesty box questions. You can get all the visuals of this show on Patreon and key and I have set up a brand new recording schedule so we will have a consistent bonus content on our Patreon 2025. Again, they're not stealing our. We're just gonna rev up and do what we can to be a part of this community and bring the community joy as we also find ways to partake in it. And with that, sister, take us out and tell us what to do.

[B]

Make sure that you are taking care of yourself and each other and and being intentional about keeping your mind moisturized by attending to the business that is yours and yours alone. You want to make sure that you are drinking just as much water as your body can sustain. And finally, but you know, almost most importantly, your largest organ is your skin and you want to be intentional about keeping that moisturized as well because your plaque will crack if it's dry.

[C]

Yeah. And put your those hot combs down. All right.

[B]

Especially if you don't know what you're doing. You're going to hurt yourself.

[C]

I'm like, come on, fold the ear.

[B]

Bye.

[A]

So I was just parking my car and then I saw you. The Gecko. Huge fan.

[B]

I'm always honored to meet fans out in the wild.

[A]

The honor is mine. I just love being able to file a claim in under two minutes with the Geico app.

[C]

Well, the Geico app is top notch.

[A]

I know you get asked this all the time, but could you sign it?

[C]

Sign what?

[B]

The app. Yeah, sure.

[A]

Oh, that means so much. Oh, it rubbed off the screen when I touched it. Could you sign it again?

[C]

Anything to help, I suppose.

[A]

You're the best.

[B]

Get more than just savings. Get more with Geico.

[A]

Hey, hate to do this. Could we reschedule our morning hike? I was just about to ask the same next week. Yes, it's Duncan Original blend time.

[B]

Staying at home with Dunkin. Don't mind if I do.

[C]

The home with Dunkin's is where you want to be.