Gettin' Grown – "Grown Woman" (March 27, 2026)
Podcast: Gettin’ Grown (Loud Speakers Network)
Hosts: Jade and Dr. Kia (with guest Dr. Chris Marsh)
Episode Theme: Celebrating nine years of Black womanhood, adulthood, and the expansive realities of love, relationships, and community—featuring a deep-dive Kitchen Table Talk on Dr. Chris Marsh’s work around singlehood in the Black middle class.
Episode Overview
The episode marks a major milestone—nine years of Gettin’ Grown. Jade and Kia open with celebration but quickly pivot to reflect on what it means to reach such a milestone in tumultuous times. The main segment is a Kitchen Table Talk with Dr. Chris Marsh, sociologist and author of The Love Jones Cohort: Single and Living Alone in the Black Middle Class. The discussion reframes singlehood within Black communities, especially for women, tackling the stigma, exploring alternatives to traditional family structures, and emphasizing agency, autonomy, and the richness of non-romantic love.
Key Discussion Points & Insights
1. Nine Years of Gettin’ Grown: Community, Transparency, and Authenticity
[03:00–10:00]
- Jade and Kia express gratitude to their listeners, emphasizing the strong, intentional support they've received over nine years.
- The hosts reflect on how their podcast space is “co-created” with listeners:
“Y’all create this vibe... This has been the special sauce for Gettin’ Grown.” —Ebony [08:02]
- Authenticity and honesty are celebrated as forms of community care and survival, especially in a world that often feels unsafe for Black women.
Memorable Moment:
“We just show up in honest and authenticity in the real of the ghettos of adulthood—we don’t know what we’re doing, but we’re figuring it out together.” —Jade [08:44]
2. The World on Fire: Finding Safety and Meaning
[10:00–15:30]
- The hosts discuss personal anxieties amid global chaos (current events like Project 2025 and airport/ICE disruptions are mentioned).
- Creating and sustaining a “safe corner” for Black women’s voices—especially during “these last and evil days.”
- Acknowledgment of mutual aid efforts and appreciation for listeners’ community support.
Notable Quote:
“I’m grateful that we’ve been able to carve out a corner for ourselves that feels safe and honors our authenticity, however it shows up—in joy, in grief, in confusion and awareness.” —Ebony [09:27]
3. Honoring Rest, Self-Care, and Community Check-in
[15:45–24:00]
- Both hosts highlight the need for real self-care and rest, not performative productivity.
- Themes of prayer, spirituality, and the “unlearning” of rigid religious rituals in exchange for authentic, direct conversation with God.
- Celebrating habits picked up from older generations (“sometimes I just sit in the car and be like, whoo, hallelujah” [18:44]).
Notable Quote:
“Sometimes I have to just talk to God like, look, I need you to keep it real with me because, honestly, I’ve been feeling nuts for a while.” —Jade [20:25]
4. Women’s History Month & Revisiting Womanhood (“Love Jones Cohort” Rewind)
[24:00–28:40]
- The episode is framed as a celebration not by “pushing through,” but by taking a pause and honoring the journey.
- In honor of Women’s History Month and Black Women’s History Month, the hosts rebroadcast a pivotal Kitchen Table episode with Dr. Chris Marsh, highlighting womanhood’s expansive possibilities and agency.
- Emphasis on the importance of revisiting old conversations with fresh perspectives.
“Our theme for Women’s History Month has been about expanding our understanding...ways that allow for variance and dimension and depth.” —Ebony [25:20]
Kitchen Table Talk: Dr. Chris Marsh on "The Love Jones Cohort"
[31:43–79:00]
Introduction to Dr. Chris Marsh
[31:43–35:16]
- Dr. Marsh is a sociologist/demographer at the University of Maryland, tenured as the first Black female demographer.
- Passionate about studying the Black middle class, not out of elitism, but to challenge narratives that only focus on Black poverty or pathology.
- The term “Love Jones Cohort” is a nod to the film and describes middle-class Black professionals who are single and living alone.
“If we’re going to understand all of Black America, I’m going to study the Black middle class.” —Dr. Marsh [35:11]
Destigmatizing Singlehood
[38:52–45:54]
- Dr. Marsh’s aim: To create nuance about Black singlehood and provide agency for those who choose it or find themselves in it.
- Critique of societal pressure on Black women to validate singleness but never require married people to justify marriage.
- Pushback on oppressive frameworks that stigmatize being single:
“I want to destigmatize singlehood…if there’s one person who opts out of an oppressive, unfulfilling and toxic relationship after reading [the book], my work is done.” —Dr. Marsh [43:40]
- Discussion of “value-add” relationships: seeking partnership out of genuine desire, not need:
“Needs have an expiration…Once that expiration comes, you no longer need that person. I want to be wanted, not needed.” —Dr. Marsh [46:59]
Broadening Definitions of Love & Family
[47:18–52:03]
- Argument for embracing non-romantic sources of love (friendship, sister circles, chosen family).
- Stresses that Black women often have deeply nurturing relationships with other women; Black men often lack such non-romantic intimacy.
- Dr. Marsh advocates for “augmented families” and “family of one” models, given legal/financial systems discriminate against singles.
- Singles’ contributions to extended families (caregiving, financial support) are often invisible.
“Why can’t we be a family of one? … I want to come back to that… The other argument: why can’t we get together and be considered an augmented family?” —Dr. Marsh [52:12]
The Intersections of Singleness and Structure: Race, Class, Gender
[55:54–66:59]
- Dr. Marsh argues that personal “choices” in singleness for Black women are highly constrained by structures—educational, economic, and historical.
- Suggests “singleism” ought to be considered alongside race, class, and gender as a source of marginalization.
- Singlehood is not the same as racism, but discrimination against singles is real and wide-ranging (from taxes to social exclusion).
- Reparations are named as one necessary societal shift:
“How about you pay Black Americans reparations and see if that might change marriage rates.” —Dr. Marsh [65:12]
- Policing of Black women’s partner choices—and the persistence of standards that disadvantage Black women—are challenged explicitly.
Navigating Stigma and Wealth
[68:27–72:31]
- Dr. Marsh’s research finds that everyone is seen as “stigmatized” in some way by singlehood (age, gender, etc.), but especially Black women.
- Discusses innovative strategies for singles regarding wealth transference (to godchildren, nieces/nephews, chosen family).
- Singles are often expected to shoulder more family caregiving duties, especially for aging parents.
“As single folks…our checkbook becomes the family checkbook.” —Dr. Marsh [70:57]
Takeaways, Advice, and Reframing
[72:22–79:00]
- The book is academic but accessible—worth reading for singles and married people alike.
- Loneliness is recognized but shown to be situational, not chronic, for most “Love Jones Cohort” members.
- The episode ends with a call to embrace multiplicity in Black love, relationships, and selfhood—affirming autonomy and rejecting stigma.
Notable Quotes & Timestamps
- “The podcast space has become the wild, wild west… this has really been a gift and practice of diligence and consistency—showing up and letting what needed to be created, be created.” —Ebony [07:01]
- “The girls that get it, get it… What better way to celebrate nine years than by taking a minute?” —Jade [24:07]
- “Sometimes I’ll just start talking—I guess they’re prayers. I’ll be like, ‘We need to chat, cause what is happening outside?’” —Jade [19:28]
- “This is not about partner-bashing, marriage-bashing, men-bashing… It’s giving options, autonomy, agency.” —Dr. Kia [76:42]
- “Your Black will crack if it’s dry.” —Jade [80:25]
Additional Highlights
- Spirits and humor run high throughout, with playful riffs on generational habits, “stinky mics” in podcasting, and the open embrace of neurodivergence and mental health.
- Listeners are invited to check out Dr. Marsh's book and revisit earlier Kitchen Table episodes, especially those centering Black women's relationships and self-determination.
Final Thought
This episode embodies Gettin’ Grown’s ethos: celebrating Black womanhood—with all its joy, messiness, complexity, and powerful community ties—while championing authenticity, rest, collective care, and self-definition at every turn. It’s an essential listen for Black women navigating adulthood and for anyone seeking a rich, affirming discourse on love, family, and self-actualization.
Listen for:
- Deep insights on singlehood in Black America
- Affirming, laughter-filled reflections on adulthood
- Honest takes on navigating celebration in hard times
- The unapologetic embrace of individual and communal growth
Referenced Book:
The Love Jones Cohort: Single and Living Alone in the Black Middle Class by Dr. Chris Marsh
Kitchen Table segment with Dr. Marsh begins at [31:43].