It’s All Falling Apart

Summary

Gettin’ Grown — “It’s All Falling Apart”

Podcast: Gettin’ Grown (Loud Speakers Network)
Date: October 7, 2025
Hosts: Jade & Keia
Episode Theme: Navigating Heaviness, Finding Hope, and Holding Community When Life Feels Overwhelming

---

Overview

In this episode, Jade and Keia open up about feeling overwhelmed by the current state of the world and the weight of adulthood as 30-somethings. With honesty and humor, they share personal stories of exhaustion, the importance of holding on to hope, and practical ways to care for oneself and others during turbulent times. The Kitchen Table Talk centers on remaining grounded and staying connected, even when, as the episode title suggests, “it’s all falling apart.”

---

Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Reminiscing on R&B, Black Names & Growing Up Black

[02:21 – 09:17]

• Jade and Keia start with lighthearted nostalgia, singing “Knockin' Da Boots” and reflecting on how, as kids, they sang grown songs like H-Town, Adina Howard, Lil’ Kim, Changing Faces, and Sparkle.
  • “All of that whispering and foolishness. Had no business knowing that song in 1993. I was in the fifth grade.” — Jade [03:57]
  • “Singing all the music that I had no business singing. …it made us who we are as a people.” — Jay [04:43]
• They joke about classic Black names (Larry, Earl, Rodney, Daquan) for both kids and pets, with much laughter about pets having middle names.
  • “My next pet’s name is Methuselah. Earl Verrette.” — Jay [07:35]

---

2. Life Updates & Feeling Grateful Amidst Change

[09:19 – 11:45]

• Jade shares gratitude for being home after extensive work travel, highlighting the comfort of routine and personal space.
  • “I’m just enjoying my mortgage and enjoying my space...things are as well as they are.” — Jade [09:34]
• Both hosts talk about aging and relating to things their grandmothers used to say, like being grateful things aren’t worse and navigating daily “ripping and running.”
• There’s an amusing conversation about health, aging, cholesterol, and realizing they’re not as young as they used to be.

---

3. Jay’s London Vacation — Blackness Abroad

[12:09 – 25:01]

• Jay recaps her London trip, focusing on:
  • Visiting museums and reflecting on the presence of stolen artifacts:
    “I wanted to review all the stolen artifacts before they are rightfully taken back… Looking at all of the stolen Egyptian artifacts.” — Jay [12:23]
  • Highlighting the Kerry James Marshall art exhibit as a major trip highlight [13:58]
  • Enjoying diverse and “ethnically good” food, but lamenting British food’s lack of seasoning:
    “Vinegar is not a seasoning.” — Jay [18:42]
  • Meeting up with friends in London and the warmth of Black community, no matter the location.
  • An awkward encounter with an Englishman who enthusiastically recommends visiting the Mayflower, prompting a teachable moment:
    “I said, my brother, listen here. We got a complicated relationship with ships like the Mayflower.” — Jay [21:33]
    “He said that? Showing all of his teeth!” — Jade [23:04]
  • Childhood memories of refusing patriotic rituals in school, and family members who taught the real history about the “Pilgrims.”
    “My Uncle G told me about the Pilgrims. Y’all not gonna believe this.” — Jade [26:24]

---

4. Kitchen Table Talk: The Heaviness of These Times & Self-Care

[32:25 – 71:13]

a) News Rundown: Global Crisis and Fatigue
[32:25 – 37:58]

• Jay recaps major world events with a focus on Gaza, Sudan, and Congo, emphasizing how interconnected economies and choices can be (e.g., how buying gold from UAE, who funds the RSF, facilitates atrocities in Sudan).
  • “Trying to exist in this world is so difficult right now.” — Jay [49:34]
• Both express the powerlessness and overload of constant bad news.

b) Holding and Naming the Heaviness — It Ain’t Just You
[37:58 – 51:01]

• Jade and Keia candidly describe feeling emotionally, mentally, and physically drained by relentless crises, and coping with the expectation to “keep going” as if everything is normal.
  • “It feels like the world is just acting like nothing is wrong.” — Jade [47:24]
  • “Sometimes the best you can is the best you can.” — Jade [51:01]
• Emphasis on the importance of boundaries with news, social media, and emotional labor.
• Laughter lightens the mood, as Jay’s persistent cough interrupts the show—a running joke about how life won’t let you be great!

c) What Hope Really Means: Not Blind Optimism [51:01 – 67:00]

• Distinguishing hope from optimism:
  “Optimism says, everything will be fine. Hope says, I don’t know how this will turn out, but whatever happens, I’m going to navigate whatever comes.” — Jade [52:16]
• Hope is a durable practice rooted in trusting you can cope, not denying reality.
• Building hope through:
  • Community (brainstorming/support meetings with friends)
  • Small, grounding actions: cleaning, watering plants, showering, reading for pleasure, connecting with family
  • Setting limits on when and how to access news
  • Playlists and music as affirmations and mood lifters

d) Faith, Fear, and Grace for Yourself [56:44 – 61:16]

• Jade reflects on reframing religious teachings about “fear not”—it’s not about shame, but about being reminded that fear is human and you are equipped to navigate it with faith.
  • “To fear is human. Your fear is how your body is signaling to you that, you know, there’s uncertainty.” — Jade [57:40]

e) The Power of Small Actions & Community [61:16 – 69:16]

• Little things anchor you in chaos—making your bed, singing, calling a loved one, being present at the gym, chatting with a neighbor.
• Community, even in passing, matters deeply for Black women who often face isolation and pressure to “have it all together.”
• The importance of self-agency and controlling the “controllables.”
  • “Inside of this house, there are things I can do to make myself feel centered and to remind myself that I am okay.” — Jade [60:33]

f) Permission to Not Be Okay [67:00 – End]

• Emphasizing that hope isn’t about being naively positive all the time—some days will simply be hard, and that’s okay.
• Inviting listeners to share what grounds them, and reminding them:
  “You’re not alone. You matter. And that’s not just enough. That’s everything.” — Jade [69:01]

---

Notable Quotes & Moments

• “We have to go back to the sturdy Black names of old. We have gotten away from that.” — Jade [06:54]
• “I just want to push us in the direction of, you know, just acknowledging that it’s okay not to be okay right now.” — Jade [51:02]
• “Hope says, I don’t know how this will turn out, but I’m going to navigate whatever comes.” — Jade [52:16]
• “Hope is a practice. It’s not a feeling. It’s a choice.” — Jade [67:00]
• “Inside of this house, there are things I can do to make myself feel centered and to remind myself that I am okay.” — Jade [60:33]
• “You don’t have to have hope every single day either. …Some days are just gonna be hard, and those days are hard. And that’s it. Full stop.” — Jade [68:38]

---

Timestamps for Key Segments

• [02:21] – R&B nostalgia & “grown” music memories
• [06:06] – Jokes about classic Black names & Black dog names
• [09:19] – Life update: being home and the comfort of routine
• [12:09] – Jay’s trip to London (art, food, “the Mayflower” encounter)
• [32:25] – News overview: Gaza, Sudan, Congo
• [37:58] – Recognizing collective heaviness
• [40:56] – Personal experiences of exhaustion and lack of control
• [47:24] – Processing the disconnect between global chaos and daily life
• [51:01] – Clarifying hope vs. optimism
• [56:44] – Reframing faith and fear
• [61:16] – Practical, grounding self-care tactics
• [67:00] – Hope is a practice, not a feeling
• [68:39] – Permission to have bad days & encouragement for listeners

---

Episode Tone

• Supportive, honest, fun, sometimes silly, always caring.
• Jade and Keia embody Black woman self-care with a mix of humor, transparency about their struggles, and practical, no-nonsense advice.

---

In Summary

“It’s All Falling Apart” is both a hug and a mirror for listeners. Jade and Keia validate the exhaustion of living in chaotic times without pretending to have it all figured out. Their message: Take care of yourself, ground in community, accept your feelings, and know that hope is less about outcomes and more about persistence and connection—especially when everything feels like it’s falling apart.

Transcript

[Jeff Bridges]

Morning Zoe Got donuts.

[Dana]

Jeff Bridges why are you still living above our garage?

[Jeff Bridges]

Well I dig the mattress and I want to be in a T mobile commercial like you teach me.

[Dana]

So Dana oh no, I'm not really prepared. I couldn't possibly at T Mobile get the new iPhone 17 Pro on them. It's designed to be the most powerful iPhone yet and has the ultimate pro camera system.

[Jeff Bridges]

Wow, impressive. Let me try. T Mobile is the best place to get iPhone 17 Pro because they've got the best network.

[Jade]

Nice.

[Dana]

Je free.

[Jade]

You heard them.

[Jeff Bridges]

T Mobile is the best place to.

[Jay]

Get the new iPhone 17 Pro on us with eligible traded in any condition.

[Jeff Bridges]

So what are we having for lunch?

[Dana]

Dude, my work here is done.

[T-Mobile Announcer]

The 24 month bill credits on experience beyond for well qualified customers plus tax and 35 device connection charge credit send and balance due if you pay off earlier Cancel Finance agreement. IPhone 17 Pro 256 gigs 1099.99 A new line minimum 100 plus a month plan with auto pay plus taxes and fees required. Best mobile network in the US based on analysis by Oklahoma Speed Test Intelligence Data 182025 Visit T mobile.com I won't.

[Jade]

Let my moderate to severe plaque psoriasis symptoms define me.

[Tremphya Medical Narrator]

Emerge as you in two clinical studies, Trimfaia gusoquumab taken by injection provided 90% clearer skin at 16 weeks in 7 out of 10 adults with moderate to severe plaque psoriasis. In a study, nearly 7 out of 10 patients with 90% clearer skin at 16 weeks were still clearer at 5 years. At 1 year and thereafter, patients and healthcare providers knew that Tremphya was being used. This may have increased results. Results may vary.

[Tremphya Safety Information Speaker]

Serious allergic reactions may occur. Tremphye may increase your risk of infections and lower your ability to before treatment, your doctor should check you for infections and tuberculosis. Tell your doctor if you have an infection or symptoms of infection, including fever, sweats, chills, muscle aches or cough. Tell your doctor if you had a.

[Tremphya Medical Narrator]

Vaccine or plan to emerge as you Learn more about Tremphya, including important safety [e-mail] or call 1-877-578-3527. See our ad in Food and Wine magazine for patients prescribed Tremphaya. Cost support may be available.

[Jade]

All right.

[Jay]

Last night I thought back when we make good love all right listen to some yeah all night long Now I want that old thing back make these moments once again a yes so won't you, so won't you do it for us Bab a good loving body rocking Knocking boots all night long? Making love until we're tired Till the break of dawn. Oh, come on, come on and turn the lights down and let me get on it, yeah. Cause when I do just me and you It'll be so rise, oh, rise all rise? Oh, giving some good love. Take it, sis.

[Jade]

Somebody rocking, knocking the boots.

[Jay]

Hey, give me some of good love.

[Jade]

Somebody rocking, knocking.

[Jay]

The Internet is such a delayed hater.

[Jade]

H Town, the girls. I mean, what? 1993.

[Jay]

93. 93. Because they say it at the top of the song. Yeah, 1993, Dino, you know, all of.

[Jade]

That, all of that whispering and foolishness had no business knowing that song. In 1993. I was all of in the fifth grade.

[Jay]

But listen, here we are, sister again. I would say when I think about. I'm like a. I don't know any new music. I'll just acknowledge that. But also when I happen to hear anything and it might make me go. I think about the fact that I was singing Adina Howard and Little Kim and Lil Kim and. And all manners of. And Changing Faces.

[Jade]

Oh my God.

[Jay]

And Sparkle, you know, Sparkle is singing.

[Jade]

About very big grown and R. Kelly's nasty behind. Absolutely.

[Jay]

Oh, oh. The whole. We're not even gonna get into him.

[Jade]

No.

[Jay]

But yes, singing all the music that I had no business singing. And you know, it's fine. Like I feel like it made us who we are as a people.

[Jade]

It is. It's absolutely fine.

[Jay]

I'm loving that tick tock trend that's going around now where it's like the Gen Alpha or the Gen Z kids and they're singing Ariana Grande and the mothers are twerking.

[Jade]

It cracks me up really. I'm like the children.

[Jay]

Do I want to do this with Noah? I might do it.

[Jade]

I mean, they're emo. They're emo music and they're just, you know, we just did not have emotions that went at that age. But you know, they're emotionally intelligent.

[Jay]

So God bless our coochies were thumping far too early, you know what I'm saying? And a named Jonathan Morris might be trying to in somebody's closet.

[Jade]

Jonathan Morris is correct.

[Jay]

Praise the Lord.

[Jade]

Oh God. It was a Jonathan, a Jeremy or something crazy like that.

[Jay]

Dante. What was that other nigga's name?

[Jade]

What was that?

[Jay]

Wayne.

[Jade]

I had a Wayne. What a name.

[Jay]

There was a Rodney.

[Jade]

A Rodney, a Tony. Then you got to get into the Quan's Daquan, Raekwon, Jaquan. All the quads up too. Always a quad hit the quad hit the Quad.

[Jay]

Hit the quad. Oh, and then there was. Ooh. And then there was Larry.

[Jade]

Now, are they still naming babies Larry these days?

[Jay]

I would be. First of all, that's my grandfather's name as well. But I would be wildly amused if I met a brand new baby named Larry.

[Jade]

A brand new baby named Larry would be amusing. It would be exactly what I need it to be. A baby named.

[Jay]

Maybe I have to have one more child so I can. And it needs to be a boy child so I can give it the middle name Earl.

[Jade]

We have to go back to the sturdy black names of old. We have gotten away from that. And I just feel like. And I think, you know, I've always said if I get a dog or something, I'm going to give it like a. A real Thurman. Thurman.

[Jay]

Oh. My next pet's name is Methuselah. That's the next pet's name. I want you to live a very long time, Methuselah. And I have to give it a middle and Methuselah something. Maybe Earl.

[Jade]

Black people give their dogs middle names.

[Jay]

Yeah.

[Jade]

Kevin Stage.

[Jay]

I think it's gonna be Methuselah. Earl Verrette. That would be my next pet's name.

[Jade]

My cons of carrying on.

[Jay]

Yeah, absolutely. Yeah.

[Jade]

Yeah. I love this. Does Trill have a middle name?

[Jay]

Not really, but I kind of call her Trlisha. So when she is, you know, I do I Trisha her, because, you know that. Aisha Equa. Yes, everybody.

[Jade]

So as we should.

[Jay]

She's. She's Trlisha sometimes. And she's like, you know, in honor of my grandfather. No middle name. So just n. Oh, yes.

[Jade]

Because doesn't have a middle name either, so.

[Jay]

Exactly. Wow, look at that.

[Jade]

Yeah.

[Jay]

What were they doing? They. They were too tired to come up.

[Jade]

It was like, listen, this is all I have.

[Jay]

Meanwhile. Meanwhile in the Caribbean. They were like, we'll give you 13, 3, 4 names.

[Jade]

I love it.

[Jay]

When I first met Tristan and he gave me his whole name, I was like, is it still going or.

[Jade]

Oh, so good. Yeah, dude. I was a twin, so maybe his mom was just like, listen, you got two names out of me already. I don't need to go any further.

[Jay]

Oh. Oh, that's right. Dito was a twin. But his twin. He grew up with his twin.

[Jade]

No, his twin passed when they were really young.

[Jay]

Okay.

[Jade]

His twin's name was Leslie. Leslie and Lester.

[Jay]

Okay. That's so black, isn't it? It's so black.

[Jade]

That is so black. That is very much a good that's how my family is characterized. So black.

[Jay]

Yeah.

[Jade]

We are just so black.

[Jay]

That is so black.

[Jade]

So black. It is just so black.

[Jay]

Well, how are you doing? What are you.

[Jade]

Oh, sister, listen, I'm. I'm grateful to be home. I'm doing okay. I'm grateful to be home because y' all know I've been traveling for the maybe 14 days or so. I was on the road for work.

[Jay]

Yes, you were.

[Jade]

So I'm grateful to just be in my own home and sleeping in my own bed. I told sis I was going cook dinner tomorrow so I can cook in my own kitchen. It's been a little while. So, you know, I'm just enjoying my mortgage and, you know, just enjoying my space and being grateful, you know, lots of change. We talk about it at the kitchen table, but it's a lot going on in the world and just in life. But, you know, all in all, as we always say, I'm safe, I have what I need. And we. We just working through it, you know, Grateful that. Grateful that things are Dd. I would say things are as well as they are.

[Jay]

And I say that is a. That's that.

[Jade]

Yes.

[Jay]

Well, as they are.

[Dana]

Yeah.

[Jade]

Just thank God that things are as well as they are, because they could be worse.

[Jay]

Think we're just thankful still in that.

[Jade]

There you go, D. I said, we just have to be grateful that things are as well as they are. And that's the truth if I ever heard it. You know, you get old enough to. To say what your grandma used to say and really mean it. That's crazy.

[Jay]

We're in a different place.

[Jade]

We in a different place. Like, I'm saying the stuff that grandma did. I used to say and be like, girl, what are you talking about? Now I really say it. And it hit. It hit.

[Jay]

Listen, this morning I made breakfast, and I. And. And. And Tristan goes later on, an hour or so later, and takes another little corner of the French toast, like he's just gonna eat it on a whim, right? Cuts a fat ass pat of butter. And I said, that is too much. The cholesterol. We've got to watch our cholesterol.

[Jade]

Okay? Because you are not 26.

[Jay]

Hello.

[Jade]

Your Honor, we cannot process this as they do.

[Jay]

I need you to. So he had to cut that pat of butter down. But I. I also had an out of body experience where I said. Did I just say that?

[Jade]

Yeah.

[Jay]

That's crazy.

[Jade]

It happens all the time. I was. I saw on. Somebody did a tick tock or it was a meme or somebody and somebody said, now, you know, I remember growing up and hearing my mom talking about ripping and running, and I never knew what she was talking about, but now all I do is rip and run. That's it.

[Jay]

And rip is rip and run.

[Jade]

We just ripping and running, Just ripping and running.

[Jay]

Same. It's like, oh, it's just constant.

[Jade]

I'm just always, you know, another one, you know, another one that's hitting this these days. And then you see it. If it ain't one thing, it's another.

[Jay]

It's another.

[Jade]

You know, if it ain't one thing, it's another. Jesus.

[Jay]

I told you I went to London town.

[Jade]

Oh, yes, my sister. How was your vacation?

[Jay]

It was actually quite enjoyable. To the blacks of London.

[Jade]

Yes. I mean, tell me about your trip across the pond.

[Jay]

You know, I did a lot of museums. I wanted to. I wanted to review all the stolen artifacts before they are rightfully taken back to where they belong.

[Jade]

Come on. You would walk around like the killmonger. Like, do you know that this was stolen from.

[Jay]

Hold on. I'm about to. You want to hear something real fast?

[Jade]

Oh, my God.

[Jay]

Because as I was at the British Museum.

[Jade]

Oh, Lord.

[Jay]

Looking at all of the stolen Egyptian artifacts. Let's see. Where's the very first video that I made? You can hear me. You all can't. You can hear me in the background as I take this footage. Hold on.

[Jade]

Just being pissed.

[Jay]

Is this. Hold on.

[Jade]

There. Stole it. Stolen.

[Jay]

That's all I could, you know, focus on for a while. So. But lovely pieces, beautiful gowns.

[Jade]

Beautiful gowns.

[Jay]

Beautiful. Well, that rota. Rosetta Stone. She stoned. It was. I was like, she's stoned and so am I.

[Jade]

All right. I know that's right.

[Jay]

One of my favorite artists has an exhibit in London. So if we. For our British listeners, I heavily encourage you all. I, Me and Tristan have gone twice here in the States, and so when I saw on an ad on the train that he had an exhibit in London at the time, and it had just started that week, I was like, it's a sign. Gotta go again. And my homegirl had never seen. Had never heard of. Of any of his art, but Carrie James Marshall.

[Jade]

Oh, nice.

[Jay]

Which is one of my favorite artists, and I love the meaning in his pieces. Please, please, not only go look him up, but if you are in London, I. I forget what they say. It's through. It's there for a couple months, I believe. But it's the Kerry James Marshall exhibit, so that was, like, one of the biggest highlights. I was like, not to stumble on one of my favorite artists.

[Jade]

I love that.

[Jay]

I ate good ethnically, you know.

[Jade]

Okay. I was concerned because, you know, you hear me?

[Jay]

No, I ate. I ate good. Ethnic. Ethnic. I was. It was. I did. Well, you know, we did some Nigerian food. We did some. Some. Some Brazilian Nigerian food.

[Jade]

Okay.

[Jay]

You know, you know, some Greek food. The Italian food was fine, but, you know. Yes. You know, fusion in the best way. So it was. So I met up with our good sis who's been on the show. Kalechi.

[Jade]

Hey, girl.

[Jay]

You know, London's baby girl. I don't know. I said so. Met up with Kalechi for dinner. Met up with our sis, Mo. You know, Mo is our good sis. He from here of this side of the pond. She moved.

[Jade]

Yeah.

[Jay]

A few years ago. And she was so clutch in just like, not just showing us around, but help. I had no service. Excuse me. So she was just. Mo is just. Mo was just always a clutch.

[Jade]

A plug. You know what I'm saying?

[Jay]

Always, always. And, like, just a joy to be around in general.

[Jade]

Yes.

[Jay]

So that would. You know, those were some highlights. But I had a good time, me and my good sis Erica, who you. Erica's been on the show before when she came and talked about her breast cancer. So we had a. We had a good time walking around London and. And, you know, just seeing what it. The. The clean New York is. What it. What it felt like.

[Jade]

I was like, this is clean New.

[Jay]

York with white British people.

[Jade]

Exactly. Paris felt very much like that as well. Like. Okay, very much okay. But no, I'm glad you had a good time. I'm glad you ate well. I'm glad that. I'm glad they slept horribly.

[Jay]

Ate well. But it was.

[Jade]

It. Was it the time difference? Was it the. Was it the jet lag?

[Jay]

I don't think that was that bad because it was, what, five hours or something? It wasn't, like, horrible. It was good. The bed was terrible. It was one of the worst beds I've slept upon in my whole existence.

[Jade]

Sorry.

[Jay]

It's fine. I was like, this is the worst part of my trip. Then I'll be fine. I'll go home and go to sleep.

[Jade]

If there's anything that will turn me into a Yelp review, Ryan White Woman. It is a terrible hotel experience.

[Jay]

You know, I'm going to be honest with you. I don't think that they care. So I was like, I'm not even gonna waste my breath. But, yeah, it was terrible sleep. Great trip, terrible sleep, good food. People were people Were, you know, generally very kind, little aloof. You know, they don't. They're so polite to a fault. They don't say nothing. I'm like, no, y' all can say excuse me or nothing. It's not even like a run. It just don't say, yeah, but I had a good time. And. And the blacks of London, you know, the blacks of everywhere, have my heart for the right view on the right side of things. So, yeah, had a. We did have an interesting interaction with this old white man.

[Jade]

Oh, Lord.

[Jay]

So I told xd, so if y' all hear this twice, God bless you. So, xd, you go here the game. So he wearing the fish and chip spot. That's the only British the whole time now.

[Jade]

Was it good?

[Jay]

The quality of it was good. I. I think that for all of this, all of the spices that they stole via. It's crazy that they don't even think about, like, what did you steal them for?

[Jade]

Crazy.

[Jay]

Is it. Was it to put in these museums.

[Jade]

Or, like, you know, imagine, like, it.

[Jay]

Feels like salt and pepper. Not even in the imagination system.

[Jade]

Yikes. That's so. Yeah, that's wild. Because I love. Not enough we talk about this, you know, how I have. I feel like my superpowers are activated when fried fish enters the chat. So I am fascinated when people just don't appreciate the goodness that is fried fish, both in terms of consuming it, but you don't respect it enough to even prepare it properly, which is wild and crazy.

[Jay]

The quality was great. Great fry, great crust, great fish. It just needed. I was like, damn, I don't even have no hot sauce to throw. Lacking flavor, vinegar is not a seasoning. You know what I mean? Like, enjoyable, but it's not. It's an acid. And do I mind that acid? No, I actually don't mind it. It would just be nice accompanied with a little salt and pepper and a little hot sauce for my personal liking. But even if that wasn't there, the salt and pepper would do. Yeah, it would do a world of wonders. You guys would be surprised.

[Jade]

So give it a try. I mean, of all the things, you.

[Jay]

Know, if I had to give you any recommendations now, that Greek restaurant didn't. Even the Nigerian spot didn't.

[Jade]

I'm sure it was over there smelling good. Because, you know, my grandma taught me a long time ago that good food smells good. So when you go into a place, they talking about, I've been. My friend. Lillian will tell you, we have gone out to dinner and we've gone to a Restaurant. One time we went to this restaurant in Alexandria, and I got in there, and she got in there. We were sitting down, getting ready to order. I said, lillian, I don't smell nothing.

[Jay]

Girl.

[Jade]

I don't smell no onions or peppers or salt, nothing. I don't smell nothing in this place.

[Jay]

I don't like that.

[Jade]

That is a red flag, girl. How we sitting in your establishment? I don't smell no.

[Jay]

What are you doing?

[Jade]

How we at the food place, and I don't smell no food cooking. So, like, what y' all got going on in here?

[Jay]

This is a drug front, clearly. I mean, you're running numbers out the back. See, that's what's. Did you all leave?

[Jade]

Yes, yes, we sure did.

[Jay]

Because you were about to be horribly disappointed.

[Jade]

If not, no money to waste. I say I very much need to smell something cooking. If I could come.

[Jay]

I at least smelled the fish frying. I just. That's when I was like, just a hit. Just a hit. But this white man. So this white man, you know, he's very excited to meet the. Oh, no, you're fine. To meet these Americans.

[Jade]

Oh, nice.

[Jay]

And he's in the spot with us. Everybody's waiting for their food to be done. And he tell. You know, him. Him and Mo are chatting because she lives there now. And he's like, you know, you've got to take your friends. And she's like, where? He said, to the Mayflower.

[Jade]

Oh, sir.

[Jay]

And all three of us stop, and we look at them, and we're like, we're gonna give you an opportunity real fast to just. And he is in his aloof world, and he goes. He says it again. You've got to take them to the Mayflower. And we're all just like. Kind of like. And I could tell it was innocent. You know what I'm saying right now?

[Jade]

Sir?

[Jay]

What I said? I said, my brother, listen here. We got a complicated relationship with ships like the Mace, et cetera, et cetera.

[Jade]

It's not exactly complicated. Very straightforward.

[Jay]

You picked up what I'm putting down when I tell you. I watched his face transform into tomato.

[Jade]

I'm sure it shattered into thousands of pieces.

[Jay]

Went from peach to. To red, red, Red delicious. That's not delicious. Worst apple ever. But the face. The face turned into a Roma tomato, which was really my personal joy out.

[Jade]

Of that whole interaction.

[Jay]

And then he goes, oh, that would explain the other family. When I told them to go and I asked them if they went, they said, no. And we're all just looking at him have this Existential crisis realization. And he was like, oh, my good. Oh, my goodness. I've learned something today. And I said, well, good. That's how I like to leave every interaction.

[Jade]

And he probably went home and told his family, like, oh, my God. Could you believe that I encouraged three black women to go visit the transatlantic slave trade?

[Jay]

Black American.

[Jade]

I told them to. To venture back and see where everything went straight to hell for their people. Do you.

[Jay]

Can you believe that?

[Jade]

He said that? Showing all of his teeth.

[Jay]

Young man did. And I was like, you. Are you really.

[Jade]

You not.

[Jay]

You are not gathering that this is a terrible relations.

[Jade]

Your heart. You see? Whoa.

[Jay]

I said, sir, I don't go to. I don't go to the statue. I don't go to Ellis. What?

[Jade]

I don't have no business over there. For what?

[Jay]

That's not how we entered over here. Stamped into stone. And you know what I'm saying?

[Jade]

Like. And the gag was, it was a second grade Takia. Like, I have no interest in going to the Statue of Liberty because my people.

[Jay]

Sister, that was me. Do you know how many calls my parents got? Jade is refusing to do the Pledge of Allegiance. And I'd be right in class, like, I'm not doing the Pledge of Allegiance because this country doesn't do anything for black people.

[Jade]

I was giving the people as St. John's the Evangelist Hotel every day.

[Jay]

My father was listening to Public Enemy and so was I. So I remember, for one father, don't.

[Jade]

Walk with the fathers to Ellis island. Because my people were not permitted to enter the country in that way because we were so stolen from the continent of Africa.

[Jay]

Listen. We were on the same page as Children Militant as. Okay, yes. I remember. I made my father a. What is that? What's that? What's the. The pasta called The. The big one. Rigatoni.

[Jade]

Okay.

[Jay]

I made my father a rigatoni necklace in elementary school. Oh, Lord. Orange string. And it was rbg. Everything was red, black, and green. Marcus Garvey.

[Jade]

Yes.

[Jay]

Also in London, I picked up the bubonic plague because white people, they don't cover their mouths or noses.

[Jade]

I mean, not a hand was washed, but go ahead.

[Jay]

Nope, nope. I picked that up. And. But that's probably between that and the bed. Those are the only complaints I have. I. I actually had a fabulous trip. And I'm gonna pray that I can just get through this episode without hacking you all's ears off.

[Jade]

My Uncle G told us. I remember my Uncle G told us when we was in first grade. It had to be first grade or Something. And I remember we were sitting in the living room. My grandma had red carpet. She had red carpet. And she had this gold furniture. It was like a gold, like, armchair that Uncle G was sitting in. He used to come down and sit in that chair and grease his scalp.

[Jay]

Yes. Oh, that's delightfully. You know, he just in there, look.

[Jade]

He just, you know, just going through. I love that he had a system. Yeah. And. And sometimes we was doing homework or something. Uncle, she said, I just remember he said, let me tell y' all about the Pilgrims. And we was just sitting there like, what? Like, all muffin cap was peeled back blue like, what?

[Jay]

Get out of here.

[Jade]

What?

[Jay]

Oh.

[Jade]

And I'm in there like, that's not what Ms. O' Donnell said in the class. And I'm going to go into tomorrow and tell them the truth.

[Jay]

Yeah, I know. Ms. O' Donnell was like, oh, God.

[Jade]

She was like, okay.

[Jay]

Oh, God.

[Jade]

Cause you better believe the next day I said, my Uncle G told me about the Pilgrims. Y' all not gonna believe this. Y' all not gonna believe this. This is gonna be crazy. Y' all sit down here. Let me tell you.

[Jay]

I love that Uncle G took opportunity when he said.

[Jade]

Uncle G said, let me tell you something. He used to come. I remember. I can see it today. He would have on his little shorts and his white socks, and he would have this big purple comb and some blue magic. He'd be sitting in that chair greasing his scalp and telling us about the. The truth of life. Let me tell y' all about the Pilgrims right quick. Sit down here and listen to Uncle G. Let me tell you about the Pilgrims. And we was in there like, what?

[Jay]

That is my favorite. Oh, my God. I live for that.

[Jade]

I love my Uncle G, man. I love Uncle G. Uncle G used to wear white pants where he wears white pants to church. You would have that purple comb in his back pocket. You could see the comb through the pocket.

[Jay]

What kind of head did he have a fro?

[Jade]

No, it was. It was not necessarily a fro, but it was like. It was like middle. It wasn't a big fro. It was kind of tapered. You know how, like in the 80s, it wasn't as wild as the 70s, but it was very much. It was not like, you know, it was kind of like a tapered on the top and it faded down. But he would just be brief, just greasing. And he would always use the back part of his hand to part. So it would be like.

[Jay]

That was his self care, you know what I'm saying, he said, I'm gonna talk to my niece and my nephew about the qualms of life.

[Jade]

He took his shower and he came downstairs after he got all greased up and ironed his clothes and he was sitting in that chair while we was doing our homework and greased his scalp and talk to us and he would tell us the truth. Let me tell y' all about the Pilgrims.

[Jay]

Said, that's right, Uncle G. Tell us.

[Jade]

About, tell us about the Pilgrims. We need to know these things.

[Jay]

Woo. I live. I live.

[Jade]

I love Uncle G. Emmy award winner in the Bronx Owned. Kerry Washington returns as Dr. Virginia Edwards in Audible's heart pounding supernatural thriller the Prophecy Season 2.

[Jay]

Also starring Giancarlo Esposito, Dulay Hill, Rinzi Felice and Ebony Obsidian. The battle between good and evil reaches new heights in this action packed sequel that pits faith against fear and pushes the fate of humankind to the edge.

[Jade]

Follow every twist and turn as Virginia and her miracle son Joshua flee from Detroit pursued by the sinister Luther Bell, played by Giancarlo Esposito and his Morning star cult.

[Jay]

With her estranged husband Ryan and Moses, a devotee with a mysterious past, Virginia finds unlikely allies in Samson and Delilah. Together they uncover the truth about Joshua's place in ancient prophecy. Each perilous step of their journey is guided by Virginia's haunting visions. While Belle's force closes in, threatening to.

[Jade]

Tear their worlds apart as natural disasters erupt, Virginia must embrace her role as both mother and chosen protector.

[Jay]

But will it all be too late? Evil is rising and time is running out. Do not miss Kerry Washington and Audible's new must Listen the prophecy season two. Go to audible.com prophecy2 that's the number two. And start listening today.

[Jeff Bridges]

Morning, Zoe. Got donuts.

[Dana]

Jeff Bridges, why are you still living above our garage?

[Jeff Bridges]

Well, I dig the mattress and I want to be in a T mobile commercial like you. Teach me. Soldana.

[Dana]

Oh no, I'm not really prepared. I couldn't possibly at T Mobile get the new iPhone 17 Pro on them. It's designed to be the most powerful iPhone yet and has the ultimate pro camera system.

[Jeff Bridges]

Wow, impressive. Let me try. T mobile is the best place to get iPhone 17 Pro because they've got the best network.

[Jay]

Nice.

[Dana]

Jeffrey, you heard them.

[Jeff Bridges]

T Mobile is the best place to.

[Jay]

Get the new iPhone 17 Pro on us with eligible traded in any condition.

[Jeff Bridges]

So what are we having for lunch?

[Dana]

Dude, my work here is done.

[T-Mobile Announcer]

The 24 month bill credits on experience beyond for well qualified customers + tax and 35 device connection charge credit send and balance due. If you pay off earlier, Cancel Finance Agreement. IPhone 17 Pro 256 gigs 109999 A new line minimum 100 plus a month plan with auto pay plus taxes and fees required. Best mobile network in the US based on analysis by Oklahoma Speed Test Intelligence Data 1H 2025 Visit t mobile.com Cooler.

[Jade]

Days call for layers that last and Quints Quince is your go to for quality essentials that feel cozy, look refined and won't blow your budget. Think $50 Mongolian cashmere, premium denim that fits like a dream and luxe outerwear you'll wear year after year. They're wool coats. They look designer level but cost a fraction of the price. Because Quints partners directly with top tier ethical factories and cuts out the middlemen, they deliver luxury quality pieces at half the price of similar brands. It's the kind of wardrobe upgrade that feels smart, stylish and effortless. I have become a quince babe here recently. I'm into their 100% genuine leather jackets. I have them in black and brown also very recently got into some of them cashmere cardigans and chunky sweaters. We live for those. Also I you know as we're in these transitional seasons I'm really into their silk. I have a couple of their silk styles skirts that you can pair with the cashmere for a fall moment. I got a lot of things in my cart. Okay. They've been getting me through especially for workwear that is also transitions and plays very nicely with the other clothes in your wardrobe. I'm a quince babe. Love it, love it love it. Find your fall staples at quint go to quint.com grown for free shipping on your order and 365 days returns now available in Canada too. That's Q-U-I-N c e.com grown to get free shipping and 365 day returns. Quince.com grown.

[Jay]

Well I'm gonna do a little news this week because you know.

[Jade]

Mercy for Jesus.

[Jay]

You know there was a whole a whole band of flotillas on the way to Gaza. I saw to break the siege and bring in aid. It was intercept it was intercepted by the IOF also I just wonder how long like you guys are really gonna play with us and act like we're stupid for the rest of our days talking about there was no aid on the boats. You ransacked the boats before you took these video like what do you like you just think are that stupid. But anyway the positive from that is that the people of Palestine, of Gaza were able to go fishing because of the distraction of the flotillas. And they caught so much fish. And that was a beautiful moment. That was. That was where you realize it was not for naught because at least something came of this and they were distracted by all of this. So they were able to just feed the masses.

[Jade]

Are you okay, sis?

[Jay]

It's okay.

[Jade]

You have some. You have some water there?

[Jay]

I have water. I have tea.

[Jade]

I just drink juice. Take a sip. Okay. Sorry.

[Jay]

It's the uncontrollable cough where it's just like, God damn, I can't.

[Jade]

And I feel like the older we get, like, I feel like the older we get coughing, it becomes like an Olympic. It feels like you ran a marathon, like, coughing. Oh, it's crazy. Everything that you have, it's like you hard.

[Jay]

You piss yourself. Like, it's all kinds. Like, it's like. It's horrible.

[Jade]

It's like, what is. My body is de. Literally degenerating right here, right now. I can't do anything.

[Jay]

What's happening? I can't do anything with this. It just is out of control.

[Jade]

So I'm sorry, sister. Take your time.

[Jay]

Let me take another sip of water. Apologies to you, listeners.

[Jade]

We're going through so much.

[Jay]

We're going through so much as we will continue to talk about. But, yes, the people of Gaza were able to get fish. And that's the beautiful part of all of this. There's also been some sort of ceasefire deal on the. Or, you know, being spoken about by our orange loogie. But, you know, we don't. We. We. We are squinting.

[Jade]

Hello. You seem squinting right now.

[Jay]

Yeah, we are squinting hard and don't trust a lot of what comes along with this because we know what their ultimate goals are. So we'll continue to pay attention. They also tried to say that Hamas is the ones who. Who stopped the flotillas. Like, it just continues to be insulting. So the rsf, who's committing a crime against humanity in Sudan, remember, the RSF is the militia. It's a genocidal militia who is. Has been terrorizing Sudan for over 800 days. Over 500. Specifically in Al Fashir, they besieged Al Fashir, which is the capital of Darfur. And they have built a wall around the city which is not only keeping aid out, but it's sealing people in. It's keeping them from being able to escape the turmoil and the torture that's. That's happening due to the rsf as of recently there's been heavy artillery attacks on residential neighborhoods, markets and shelters in Al Fashir, and an undetermined number of civilians were killed and injured. And this is just within the. The last, not even 24 hours of the recording of this episode. Now, remember that the RSF is being funded by the uae. So trips to Dubai when we want to go and ride four wheelers in the desert and eat pistachio cream chocolate straight first. I'm not saying you don't make the at home, but you know what I'm saying. Support buying gold that comes from the uae, so forth and so on is what is funding the torture that is happening in Sudan. So, you know, I thought it. I thought it important, even though we have had Sarah on the show before, to discuss where all of this comes from. I know it's hard for us to understand and also comprehend, especially being in a completely different part of the world, but I think references to who. Who the RSF is being funded by and so forth just kind of put things in perspective on how, when we are asking how we cannot be complicit or how we can be less complicit in. In the massacres happening around the world. The. The. You have to understand the knowledge and the foundation of where this comes from. So I just thought it important for us to discuss, you know, a little bit of what's going on also in Congo, pray for those women and those girls. They are under constant attack, and we. We don't. We don't want to forget them in our prayers as well. So just continue to keep yourself aware of what's going on around the world. Clearly, I am struggling right now, so I'm gonna kick it over to Kia.

[Jade]

Yeah. Thanks for always keeping us date and informed with what's happening. And we really wanted to just, I think in the kitchen table today, we were going to just acknowledge, you know, in the same vein of the announcements and sort of what's going on, the state of the world. Jade and I just wanted to acknowledge the heaviness of the time because, you know, I don't know about anybody else, but Jaden and I were talking earlier, and it's just heavy for a number of reasons. Right. So it's not like there's just a perpetual. Like, we are. We are bombarded with. With news and information and misinformation and disinformation all of the time. And if you're not careful, you'll be inundated, overwhelmed. And what you ingest, you know, can stay with you if you're not diligent about setting up some boundaries. And I just know that even, you know, despite my boundaries, it's been heavy and it is felt very hard. And I think we wanted to just sort of talk through that and be honest and transparent in acknowledging that, you know, that's where we are. And we recognize that's probably where a lot of people are as well. And so in just creating some space and time to sort of talk about that and what, what that has been like, we also wanted to offer some of the things that we are doing, are going to try to do or, you know, there are a little. Some resources that I've been able to find this week that will help us to hold on and keep perspective and even find hope in heavy times. The story therapy episode that we did a couple weeks ago or last week, I'm not sure, was really just an amazing way for us to escape the heaviness of the time by, you know, sort of reconnecting with some of our old own stories and memories and, and, you know, times. So building off of that, we want to think a little bit about what are some ways we can keep that same energy and keep. Keep holding on and persisting through heavy times when it seems like things are heavy and getting heavier by the minute. So, you know, I know we talk about when we check in in the beginning, since we always talk about, like, you know, how we're doing, but specifically talk a little bit about, you know, what your experience of this week has been and what heaviness has sort of looked and felt like for you.

[Jay]

Oh, okay. Outside of everything you're hearing, I've been unbelievably exhausted, like, in a way where I feel like I can't even control how tired I am the other night. And anybody who, like, really knows me knows this is a feat normally, right? I got into bed the other night, I was tired, and I said, I'm tired. I'm going to bed. And I got into bed 10:30. I probably would sleep by 10:45.

[Jade]

That's not like you, sis, if it's not like me neither. But yeah, that's wow.

[Jay]

But yes, I have been sick. I have been unbelievably exhausted. And I don't even think it's because I'm not feeling well. I've just been so tired. So I climbed into bed and I just passed out. And I realized when I got up the next day and I was like, you got eight hours of sleep. I also was still tired, as if I did not get eight Hours of sleep. And so I think my. I can't speak for everybody. I think my body can't comprehend all of the incoming information fast enough. You know what I'm saying? It goes into. It goes into some kind of shutdown mode.

[Jade]

I just want to say that you was not coughing all the time. We was talking before we started recording. We talked for like an hour, was it? And you wasn't coughing. Just what a hater. Life can be such a hater sometimes.

[Jay]

Like say, oh, you're getting ready.

[Jade]

Oh, you need to work, do ya?

[Jay]

Allow me to reintroduce myself. My name is Carl.

[Jade]

You got things to do. That's what you think.

[Jay]

God. And it's like one of those post nasal coughs. So like it just attacks you and you can't do about it. And I've had bronchitis since I was a kid. Once you get bronchitis, you always have it. It just lays dormant in your body, really. So every time I would get. That's what a doctor told me. Now this was also in the early 90s, I don't know, but the early 1900s, as the kids say. That's what a doctor told me years ago. Bronchitis lays dormant in your body once you have it, and so it can be triggered. And mine gets triggered when I get sick. So like every time I'm at the end of being sick, I get this hacking, annoying cough and it terrorizes my sleep and my peace. It makes me want to rip my own throat out. Like the horror movie that I just watched on the plane.

[Jade]

You watch horror movies on planes?

[Jay]

Not generally, but I was. I guess I was in the mood. Might also speak to the state of the world. I think I was like, let's get back on this plane. I watched Smile.

[Jade]

Wow.

[Jay]

What's the other? I watched the old movie. What's the old movie from the. From the. The 1900s as well. Oh, what's that movie called? With the witches?

[Jade]

The Witches.

[Jay]

Not. Not Charmed. That was a TV show. The Craft.

[Jade]

I was about to say Hocus pocus. Pocus.

[Jay]

I watched the Craft and I watched Smile and I was like, all right. So you was feeling away.

[Jade]

Yeah, that's what I mean.

[Jay]

Oh, well, I think I. I also was feeling murderous. The person next to me was sick as well. I don't know where I got. I could have gotten this from any number of places. The man across the aisle was sick. Had both of his nostrils.

[Jade]

Yeah.

[Jay]

The whole flight. The boy next to me. I had to be like, you'll do like, were you taught how to cover your mouth?

[Jade]

Yeah.

[Jay]

He's giving me the stupidest looks in the world. And I am trying not to get put on a no fly list. And here I am hacking in you all's ears like Wendy Williams. Because, you know, Wendy Williams didn't give a. If she scrunked.

[Jade]

She was literally burpees. And yeah. The queen of all media, ladies and gentlemen.

[Jay]

Yeah, I really love her. And so here I am, Wendy Williams, because I'm trying to make it through this episode. And I feel horrible.

[Jade]

I told you we did not have to do this. I want the record to reflect that I have tried to tell Jay that we don't have to finish. The people will understand. She just continues.

[Jay]

I'm like, what does that even sound like? This is a mess. This is.

[Jade]

I'm sure the people have literally listened to you cough for the last 17 minutes. And they're probably like, jay, please.

[Jay]

Wow. But I know I just did. I was like, I've just never abandoned an episode like, mid.

[Jade]

No, I think this is. This is unprecedented. But I'm just literally watching you trying to work through this cough network to terrorize your life. I just don't want you to be over here going through this.

[Jay]

Oh, my God.

[Jade]

Y' all, listen. Well, I. I too, have the heaviness. Really bad. I've not been sleeping, I think, to your point, sis, last night I got into bed. Not got into bed. I went down and sat on my. Got on my couch and just with my blanket and curled up in the corner of my couch. And that was at like 7pm and I. I got there and I said, I'm not. I'm not moving. Like, this is just gonna be it for the rest of the day. Because the week has just ruling. And I think my body is exhausted, my mind is exhausted, and I haven't been sleeping well because every time I lay down, even physically tired, like, I will fall asleep, but I won't stay asleep. So, like, I'll wake up thinking about something three to four hours after I lay down. And it's just frustrating. And so I also was telling. Telling you in the beginning when we started talking earlier, like, I think another thing that's really messing with me is that we are just acting the world. It feels like the world is just acting like nothing is wrong. And that is bothering me. I feel like we are still expected to show up and do all of the things at work and push through our meetings and responsibilities and obligations and, you know, all the things are just on our calendars. And we're still expected to show up and perform as, you know, literally while our phones are dinging and ringing off the hook with terrible news, like, news of every five years, literally, like, not just, you know, unfortunate things, but, like, news of, like, crisis and lives lost and, you know, political collapse. Like, all. All manner of everything. And then it's just like, yeah, but I still got to send those emails and do the things that, you know. You know, I think that's the part that weighs on me very, very heavily.

[Jay]

Yeah, I. I agree. And it's. It's. You know, and I appreciate different perspectives that put the. You know, that put things into perspective. For a shout out to Brittany, she always was talking recently about how. Reminding us, you know, we exist in this world, and just because you have to do certain things to take care of yourself or whatever the case is, it doesn't make you a capitalist, you know, and also put. If you've got those. If you got those, you got bumps on your wall and on your ceilings, and you know what I'm saying? You have, you know, textured walls. You definitely don't need to be worrying about being no cap.

[Jade]

Hello?

[Jay]

Because you're poor, Stucco girly. You're poor. And this is not. This call is coming. I'm.

[Jade]

The call is coming inside the house.

[Jay]

Trying to exist in this world is so difficult. It's so difficult right now. And also, you know, trying to navigate your personal belief system when it goes against everything that's happening around us and you're trying to survive. I know this is the worst time of work for me. And I don't even know how long. Like, so long. It's so challenging, and, you know, I'm still trying to figure out how to exist through. And I feel crazy. I feel crazy. But. All right, well, we got to go record love after lockup. Meanwhile, this nigga has shut down the full government, you know what I'm saying? And people are dying, Kim. So I. I'm just really having a hard time keeping my bearings and getting my bear. On top of the fact that my cat is trying to gnaw at my ankles. I can't really promote him of peace without sex. People hanging off my tits.

[Jade]

Trisha, please.

[Jay]

She's.

[Jade]

Look at that squid. Just going through in real time.

[Jay]

We're really, really going through it in real time. I think this episode is clear, messy indication of everything else.

[Jade]

That's what we're gonna call it. It's all falling apart, and we're just.

[Jay]

It's all falling Apart. And I don't have a bad. This episode is my petty thief.

[Jade]

No, truly, I think, you know, there's good perspective.

[Jay]

Oh, my God.

[Jade]

I just want to push us in the direction of, you know, just acknowledging that it's okay not to. To be okay right now. Acknowledging that you. It's nothing wrong with you if you feel crazy. I would. I would argue that it's something wrong with you if you don't feel crazy right now. And. And, you know, sometimes the best you can is the best you can, and, you know. Yeah, you know, whatever that looks like for you. Give yourself space and grace to do that. We want to be mindful of not conflating hope and optimism. It's important to understand the difference between those things. Optimism says, everything will be fine. It'll all work out. Hope says, I don't know how this will turn out, but whatever happens, I'm going to navigate whatever comes. Hopes can feel fragile because it's tied to a specific outcome. When things don't go the way we hoped, optimism is shattered. But hope is durable, and it's our job to. To trust that. I think that hope is in our DNA, that hope is a part of who we have been programmed and raised and socialized to be in this world. It's not about denying reality or pretending things aren't hard. It's about believing in your capacity to cope and the capacity of the community that you are within. You will adapt. You will find meaning, you will find joy, even when circumstances are difficult. And so I think, you know, I'm working on. Try to bear that in mind. And, you know, hope is. Is bigger than just sort of saying, I'm hopeful. But there are ways in which we can embody hope in practice. You know, instead, you know, like Jay was saying, the government shut down, and I can't control the government shutdown, but I can control how I show up for my family today. I can control how I show up for my sister. I can control, you know, being intentional about making someone smile or speaking or letting somebody know that they're not alone. You can say, this is genuinely difficult, and I can still try to find moments of peace and joy within it. I've been leaning very heavily in my. Into my playlist. I've been creating playlists.

[Jay]

Sorry.

[Jade]

Speaking of playlists, that's the playlist of New York City.

[Jay]

Okay.

[Jade]

No, I'm saying I've been creating playlists. There have been songs that I feel like have given me some steadiness in all of the crazy. There's this one song. Oh, I like that. Yeah. And so I've been like, listening to certain songs on repeat. I posted one on my social media this week. And you know, it's like, it's like remembering. And your affirmations are not, you know, they're bigger than just sort of declarations. They are reminders. They are ways in which you program your nervous system to sort of believe what you're saying. So even when you don't feel like what you're saying makes sense or you don't see how it makes sense, you just got to keep saying, and that's how we literally build hope and faith and optimism. It's so important. It's so important because I said one of the things I've been dealing with this week and I feel I'll shut up because I feel like I just have been talking.

[Jay]

But please, I can't. So you might as well.

[Jeff Bridges]

Morning, Zoe. Got donuts.

[Dana]

Jeff Bridges, why are you still living above our garage?

[Jeff Bridges]

Well, I dig the mattress and I want to be in a T mobile commercial like you teach me. So.

[Jay]

Dana.

[Dana]

Oh no, I'm not really prepared. I couldn't possibly at t mobile get the new iPhone 17 Pro on them. It's designed to be the most powerful iPhone yet and has the ultimate pro camera system.

[Jeff Bridges]

Wow, impressive. Let me try. T mobile is the best place to get iPhone 17 Pro because they've got the best network.

[Jay]

Nice.

[Dana]

Jeffrey, you heard them.

[Jeff Bridges]

T Mobile is the best place to.

[Jay]

Get the new iPhone 17 Pro on us with eligible traded in any condition.

[Jeff Bridges]

So what are we having for lunch?

[Dana]

Dude, my work here is done.

[T-Mobile Announcer]

The 24 month bill credits on experience beyond for well qualified customers plus tax and 35 device connection charge credits and balance due if you pay off earlier. Cancel Finance Agreement. IPhone 17 Pro 256 gigs $1099.99 and new line minimum $100 plus a month plan with auto pay plus taxes and fees required. Best mobile network in the US based on analysis by Ooklove Speed Test Intelligence data 1H 2025 Visit t mobile.com I.

[Jade]

Won'T let my moderate to severe plaque psoriasis symptoms define me emerge as you.

[Tremphya Medical Narrator]

In two clinical studies, Trimfire gusulcomab taken by injection provided 90% clearer skin at 16 weeks in 7 out of 10 adults with moderate to severe plaque psoriasis. In a study, nearly 7 out of 10 patients with 90% clearer skin at 16 weeks were still clearer at 5 years. At 1 year and thereafter, patients and healthcare providers knew that Tremphya was being used. This may have increased results. Results may vary.

[Tremphya Safety Information Speaker]

Serious allergic reactions may occur. Tremphya may increase your risk of infections and lower your ability to fight them. Before treatment, your doctor should check you for infections and tuberculosis. Tell your doctor if you have an infection or symptoms of infection, including fever, sweats, chills, muscle aches or cough. Tell your doctor if you had a vaccine or plan to emerge.

[Tremphya Medical Narrator]

As you learn more about Tremphya, including important safety [e-mail] or call 1-877-578-3527. See our ad in Food and Wine magazine for patients prescribed Tremphaya, cost support may be available.

[Jade]

But I just feel like all my life, you know, I grow up, I'm a believer and growing up in church, but I feel like, you know, as an adult, I am coming to develop my own relationship with the word of God in prayer. And, you know, I feel like I am reframing some of the things that I heard all my life as a child. And I've been thinking about fear quite a bit because I feel like all. All your life, you know, people say things like, if you're gonna pray, you can't worry, or, you know, the Lord tells us not to fear. Fear not. Fear not. I looked it up. The words fear not appear in the King James version of the Bible like 71 times. And so, yeah, but I feel like I wondered, and I'm offering that perhaps God says fear not so much not because we should feel shame when we feel afraid, but rather because to fear is human.

[Jay]

Right?

[Jade]

Your fear is how your body is signaling to you that, you know, there's uncertainty, there's. There's something that you need to pay attention to. And so it's very natural and normal for you to be fearful when you are presented with scary situations and circumstances. And so I'm trying to reframe all of the things in the Bible that caution us against fear or discourage us from fear as not like God being frustrated when we are afraid, but rather he is reminding you that when you are afraid, you know, that's when you should encourage yourself and you should remember that I am encouraging you to not be afraid because of who I am and because of who you are in me. And so I've been trying to do some work to not only just sort of repeat the things that I've heard all my life, but to really just think about them and trouble and interrogate, you know, sort of my own sort of belief and interpretation about things and to resist any sort of programming that would make me feel sort of shame. Right. It's not punitive. When God says, fear not, he's not saying, look at you, just. Just raggedy over there, scared. He's not saying that. He's not saying that. He's saying, like, I get it. You human. This is scary. Let me remind you who I am.

[Jay]

Yep.

[Jade]

Let me remind you that I have equipped you to manage this. Let me remind you that I've kept my promises to you in the past, and I'm not gonna just stop prom. Keeping. You know, keeping them today. So there are micro actions and little things that we can do to restore our perspective and to give us some sense of agency when it feels like things are completely out of control.

[Jay]

Absolutely. So I think even recently, I, you know, met up with some friends and not even in a let's hang out since it was more of like a let's brainstorm and figure out how we can support each other, because everybody's feeling dishevelled. So how do we support each other and find some grounding within community? And that was. That was one of the days of. Out of the many where I'd walked away saying, okay, there was some remnants of. Of feeling hopeful. Not that this is getting ready to get better, but that I have the means to exist and I exist within community, as all of these things are going on as well. And it can't, you know, shake the whole foundation. And so I think moments like that where you lean into faith, faith, you lean into community. You lean into the knowledge that we've been through really bad before, but, like, we're able to make it through those things. Those are just some of the ways so that we don't completely crash because. And I'm speaking to myself as well. You know what I mean?

[Jade]

Yes. And there are. You have to remember those small things, those things. It's about what can ground you, what keeps your. Your feet on the ground when things feel like they're swirling all around you. And, you know, it's very easy to feel powerless, but there are things that you can do. No. And I've been trying to remind myself this. Like, no, I don't have control of what goes on outside of this house, but inside of this house, there are things that I can do to make myself feel centered and to remind myself that I am okay. And, you know, my therapist often reminds me that when you feel overwhelmed, generally, like, in life, you know, like, do something to.

[Jay]

Yeah.

[Jade]

You know, like, she said she would tell me to clean, like, if the whole room is Overwhelming. Or if you know, you're feeling cluttered, like, you know, clear out a drawer, say, I'm gonna clean everything off of this table. You can organize drawer, water your plants, light a candle. Sometimes it's just like, let me make.

[Jay]

My bed, let me put away a little laundry.

[Jade]

Put. You know what I'm saying? Like, let me, let me do something when I'm feeling centered in my body, when I'm feeling chaotic in my body. Because sometimes I get so anxious, it feels like I can't. Like I'm restless in my body. Like I'll get up, I'll take a shower. Shower helps me feel like I'm resetting. Like, it's like, wow, that was trash.

[Jay]

Woo.

[Jade]

You know, that was a trash meeting. That was a trash conversation that made me feel crazy.

[Jay]

I need to wash that right off my face.

[Jade]

Let me just go ahead and I'm gonna jump in the shower and that's gonna make me. It's like a reset. It's literally like a hard refresh. It's like a control, alt, delete in my mind. Let me just run through the shower right quick and wash my tail. I'll step outside.

[Jay]

Exactly.

[Jade]

Feel the sun on my face. Or you know, I'll turn on a song and I'll just sing to the top of my lungs. Those are the things that, that we can do, you know, read a page of something. Like I'll tell myself all the stuff I'm doing for work and I'm constantly like surrounded by like academic or work related stuff. It's like I'm going to read, I'm going to look at one of the books that, you know, something I want to read for my own enjoyment and I'm going to read a chapter of that. Or I'll look at an old picture or I'll call my mom and we'll share stories about anything. The point is that these actions don't fix everything, but they will remind you that you still have agency, you still can make some choices. There are things that you can do to make yourself feel better. And even when it feels like all the world around you is sort of working against you. But yeah, like, like you said, think about why community matters in heavy times. Think about ways to cultivate or lean into community. Even if it's just like, you know, when you at the gym, you know, speaking to people, checking in, have like lingering for a couple of minutes and just really, how you doing today day? Everything all right? Like, you know, like, you know, like that little stuff, really, which is what people.

[Jay]

People used to exactly like with church stuff like that. People used to linger around and chat and. Because I know many people do go to church, but many people. Church culture is not as heavy as it once was.

[Jade]

Correct.

[Jay]

And so I think even bringing that into other spaces because church was community is important actually to continue into sustain.

[Jade]

We have to be intentional about, like you said, integrating that into our everyday practice. And I feel like covet made it worse a little bit. Where are so isolated and so insulated that we don't.

[Jay]

Yes.

[Jade]

We just keep. And I'm just, you know, I'm an introverted person naturally. But you know, if I'm not busy, if I'm not careful, I'll just move throughout a whole day and not speak to nobody. And it's not like I am intentionally like avoiding people, but I'm just in my own head and not even conscious.

[Jay]

Exactly.

[Jade]

And so sometimes I make myself, you know, when we are at the gym and we work out in stations, like, you know, it'll just be like make some eye contact with the person next to you and you know, share a laugh or you know, whatever. Like, you know, just connect. Those things really matter. They really matter. And they have been making. They have been making a difference for me and helping me to sort of manage how absolutely ridiculous this. This time feels and is.

[Jay]

Because it is absolutely ridiculous this. I. I don't even want to get into the specifics of the usage of AI on social media and things like that by people who are supposed to be running child. Oh Christ almighty. I don't even. Just protect your peace. Protect your peace. Protect your peace in every way. And that's. That is the best that we can do right now in every way, shape, form and fashion. You know, stay aware. But like, like take us, put it in a pocket. I. You all know I like to stay informed. But now I do it in a. In a parameter. I'm like, all right, I'm gonna do it from this time to this exactly. To see what's going on. I can't do the constant check in because it's not good for my nervous system. And then I can't do any fighting or any functioning or anything that's even gonna add to these causes in a positive way. You know what I'm saying? So just like gather yourself, get your feet on the ground and figure out the best way that you can navigate.

[Jade]

Yeah. And I can't listen to the news in the morning. Like I have, you know, to your point about like time I realized that sometimes Even before I would get out of bed, I would take my phone and start, like, looking through things. And before I know it, like, you know, even before I get up, I'm pissed or of stressed or upset. And so I have to be really diligent about how my day starts and how it ends. So, you know, just pay attention.

[Jay]

And I think that's.

[Jade]

Yeah. Pay attention to how things are impacting your body. And when you notice that things don't make you feel good, like, you have the power and you have the agency and the autonomy to make changes that will make you function better. Because, you know, just like they say on the plane, like, you got to put your mask on before you can help anybody else. And so if you was always in react, reactive, defensive, hell, no, Mo. Then you're not. You're not good to the causes that. That you're not good to the causes that, you know, we need to be paying attention to and contributing our efforts.

[Jay]

Yeah.

[Jade]

Towards. So, you know, just want to remind. Yeah, I just. We just wanted to remind y' all that hope isn't about being naive or pretending that things aren't hard. But hope is a practice. It's not a feeling. It's a choice. And you have to make it over and over again. You have to believe that what you're doing matters, that connection matters, community matters. And that showing up for yourself and for each other, even, and especially when the world feels overwhelming, that matters, too. So let us know what you're doing if there are things that you guys are doing to keep yourself lifted and centered and grounded during this crazy and chaotic time. Let's share tips and strategies and pastimes and just help and support with. With one another in the comments. Y' all can always feel free to send us an [e-mail] and share, you know, one small thing that's helping you hold on to hope or boundaries that you've been setting to protect your peace, or, you know, if there's something that you need right now that you feel like you don't have or you're afraid to ask for, let us know and we can share those and just continue to continue the conversation. Also, want to say something that I feel like is really important. You don't have to have hope every single day either. You know, I think it's. It's realistic, and I feel like it is all also very fair. Like, some days are just gonna be hard, and those days are hard, and that's it, full stop.

[Jay]

And that's okay.

[Jade]

Yeah. And that's okay. But maybe today or tomorrow or whenever you feel. Hear this or feel this or whatever, like, just. We just want to remind you that you still have a say. You still have agency. You're not alone. You matter. And that's not just enough. That's everything. Don't lose sight of that.

[Jay]

Yeah.

[Jade]

Even when it's all falling apart, like, you know, you. You still have yourself and you're still taking care of yourself in a crazy time. And that's really all we. We can ask or expect of one another.

[Jay]

Huh? You're doing the best you can with what you got. Oh, in it all yeah, it all fall down.

[Jade]

This is Selena. You just like a safe belt.

[Jay]

I know. Saved my life. Hey, on that note. On that. No.

[Jade]

Yeah.

[Jay]

We're gonna get up out of here because I am dying in front of your eyes and ears.

[Jade]

You made it through. I'm proud of you. You did it, Joe.

[Jay]

Oh, much as God did it, Joe. Barely. Barely. I'm gonna go lay my ass down.

[Jade]

Absolutely. Go lay down.

[Jay]

I'm about to go lay down. And before anybody sends me any remedies or recommendations. I've done it.

[Jade]

Yes.

[Jay]

I've done it. I've done it.

[Jade]

She's doing it.

[Jay]

Okay. This tea is thyme and ginger and turmeric and all kinds of push out. I've done it all, so it just has to pass. But thank you so much for your care and concern, and. Sister, take us out. Tell them what to do.

[Jade]

Yes. Y' all make sure that you are taking care of yourself by moisturizing your mind. And the best way to do that, the most efficient way to do that, is to mind your business. Okay? Take care and worry about yourself. You also want to moisturize your insides by drinking just as much water hydration as your body can sustain every day. Okay? Don't just do it one day. You got to do it every day. And finally, you want to take care of your largest organ, which is your skin, because your black will crack if it's dry. Love y'. All.

[Jay]

Or if you have to blow your nose 372 times a day.

[Jade]

We're gonna be okay.

[Jay]

Take care.

[Jade]

You take care of yours.

[Jay]

We're gonna be all right.

[Jade]

Yes. Love y'.

[Jay]

All. That's what I'm about to go do right now. I love you guys. Bye.

[Jade]

Bye. I won't let my moderate to severe plaque psoriasis symptoms define me.

[Tremphya Medical Narrator]

Emerge as you. In two clinical studies, Trimfaia guselkumab, taken by injection, provided 90% clear skin at 16 weeks in 7 out of 10 adults with moderate to severe plaque psoriasis. In a study, nearly 7 out of 10 patients with 90% clearer skin at 16 weeks were still clearer at 5 years. At 1 year and thereafter, patients and healthcare providers knew that tremphya was being used. This may have increased results. Results may vary.

[Tremphya Safety Information Speaker]

Serious allergic reactions may occur. Tremphya may increase your risk of infections and lower your ability to fight them. Before treatment, your doctor should check you for infections and tuberculosis. Tell your doctor if you have an infection or symptoms of infection, including fever, sweats, chills, muscle aches or cough. Tell your doctor if you had a vaccine or plan to emerge.

[Tremphya Medical Narrator]

As you learn more about tremphaya, including important safety information, at tremphaya.com or call 1-877-578-3527. See our ad in Food and Wine magazine. For patients prescribed tremphaya, cost support may be available.