Studs On ICE

Summary

Gettin’ Grown – Episode: Studs On ICE (May 5, 2026)

Hosts: Keia and Jade

Podcast Theme: Two proud Black women navigating adulthood, offering authenticity, humor, and lessons in self-care—with a focus on friendship, vulnerability, and real-life adulting in a tumultuous world.

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Episode Overview

This “mini” episode is dedicated to Mental Health Awareness Month, with Keia and Jade checking in candidly about how they're really doing in a world that, in their words, feels “actively burning down around us.” They reflect on the external chaos—from politics to pop culture—and share real coping tactics, discuss boundaries, community, and practical commitments to self-care beyond the surface. The show’s hallmark conversational style is as insightful as it is vulnerable and funny.

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Episode Highlights & Key Discussion Points

1. Kitchen Table Talk: Music, Black Excellence & Nostalgia (Starts ~03:00)

• Begins with a rich discussion on soul music, the art of a good cover, and the legends in Black music: Stevie Wonder, Luther Vandross, Jodeci, and Charlie Wilson.
• Reflections on showmanship in past generations of artists vs. today’s music industry.
• Notable quote:

  “We're just not getting music like before. The showmanship... people cared about every detail that was a part of their performance.”
  —Jay (08:27)

• Gentle shade thrown at the brevity and sameness of modern songs, with a loving critique of artists like Chris Brown and shoutout to Usher for still bringing showmanship.

Memorable Segment

• Jodeci/Casey & Jojo concert stories (05:50+)
• Luther Vandross’s 75th birthday playlist (04:18)

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2. Pop Culture & Community: Michael Jackson Biopics & Performing Arts (~10:00–18:00)

• Deep dive on the quality of music biopics, particularly Michael Jackson's legacy (“Jackson 5: An American Dream” taking the top spot, and skepticism about new biopics).
• Insights on artistry and mastery—comparing vocalists who “play their voice like an instrument” (e.g., MJ, Beyoncé, Duran Bernard).
• Funny aside about “Moonwalker” being “weird, strange, and jarring.”
• Notable quote:

  “It’s not going to be another Michael Jackson biopic that would be comparable to the Jackson 5 American Dream.”
  —Jade (14:22)

• Celebration of community moments at MJ's “This Is It” screening and MJ: The Musical, reinforcing how Black cultural touchstones bring people together.

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3. Mental Health Awareness Month: Raw Reflections (26:25+)

Naming the Chaos

• Jade and Jay call out the “glaring abnormality” of being expected to function as normal in a world that is anything but.
• Recognition of “gaslighting” feelings; they validate listeners who feel heavy, overwhelmed, crazy or out of sorts.
• Notable quote:

  “If you feel like you are being gaslit every time you open your eyes... it’s because you are.”
  —Jade (28:17)

Mental Health Check-In

• Jade: Explains the “labor” of performing normalcy amidst abnormal circumstances, and how that leads to exhaustion and a sense of being “burdened”—“I just feel burdened… like heavy laden” (38:27)
• Jay: Describes herself as “Ross stressed for less” and relates to the chaos of a Ross department store (33:02)
• Both emphasize honoring difficult feelings, not rushing to solutions.

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4. Coping & Commitments: What Real Self-Care Looks Like (41:05–55:00)

Practical Tips & Commitments

• “Internal work” over surface-level pampering.
• Cognitive health: reading actual books, sudoku, puzzles, memorizing phone numbers, and even navigating without GPS to exercise the brain.
• Jade: Recommitting to prayer journaling—even if prayers are short, conversational, or just about presence.
• Boundaries: Committing to putting phones away at night to improve sleep and mental clarity; inspired by friends like Fran who only check their phone at certain times.

  “I’m a scroller... and hours have passed, and it’s really bad at night. It’s affecting my sleep.”
  —Jade (46:12)

• Feeding oneself during the day—especially important for those who get consumed by work and neglect basic needs.

  “It was a struggle for me to feed myself during the day. This is insane.”
  —Jay (55:00)

• Encourages listeners to name their own boundaries and practices, even small things (e.g., having an overdue conversation, truly logging off from work at 5pm).

On Grief and Spirituality

• Honest talk about how grief (e.g., after losing a loved one) changes one’s routines and rhythms, and the permission to adapt.
• Notable quote:

  “There’s real relationship there… sometimes we’re just in the same space. And that is still closeness.”
  —Jade (51:36)

• No pressure spirituality: Relationship with God (or one's spiritual practice) shouldn’t add to stress or feel transactional.

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5. Community & Political Check-In (~27:00, ~35:00, ~59:00)

• Brief mention of the Voters Rights Act and wider political chaos—promising deeper dives in future episodes.
• Observations about “stud ICE agents,” the infiltration of Black and Brown bodies into oppressive structures, and the surrealist climate of U.S. politics in 2026.
• Call to intentional community—building real support networks outside of digital disconnection, learning from the tight-knit activism of the 1960s.

  “Let’s be intentional about fostering community... and be a village together.”
  —Jay (61:25)

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6. Listener Engagement & Graduation Announcements (56:43+)

• Graduation season is here: Listeners are encouraged to send announcements to be read aloud on future episodes, starting May 15 and for the month to come.
• Reminder: Honesty Box is still open for listener questions.

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Notable Quotes & Moments

• On the exhaustion of modern adulthood:
  “There's a labor with having to sit in abnormal situations and being expected to act like everything is normal.”
  —Jade (34:18)

• On the importance of being real about your mental health:
  “Sometimes it’s the healthiest thing to just be honest: I feel crazy. This feels crazy.”
  —Jade (31:06)

• On boundaries with technology:
  “Fran said that she started charging her phone in a different room. And I think that I might try that on for size.”
  —Jade (47:07)

• On rethinking routines after loss:
  “Sometimes in grief, it’s not that I don’t want to pray, but I don’t know what to say. My prayers just become short and conversational.”
  —Jade (49:23)

• On nurturing community:
  “This spirit of solitude and independence… has taken us away from pouring into the community that we once were… We have to find intentional ways to foster that village.”
  —Jay (61:24)

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Timestamps for Key Segments

• 03:00: Kitchen Table Talk – Covers, classic R&B, and concert experiences
• 08:27: Showmanship in music—critique of modern artists
• 13:05–16:11: Biopics, MJ’s legacy, performing artistry
• 26:25: Mental Health Awareness Month & naming the chaos
• 33:02: "Ross stressed for less"—personal check-ins
• 41:05: Moving from checking in to practical commitments
• 46:12: Setting real boundaries (esp. with technology)
• 49:23: Spiritual routines and adapting after grief
• 55:00: Remembering to eat—basic self-care
• 56:43: Graduation announcements and community news
• 61:24: The importance of rebuilding intentional community

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Tone & Style

• Wise, hilarious, and honest—adopting a kitchen table, homegirl energy.
• Direct, unfiltered, but always caring; adept at holding complexity (“I feel burdened”; “I feel violated by that”).
• Blends pop culture, politics, adulting hardships, and joyful self-care into a balm for listeners, especially Black women navigating similar struggles.

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Closing Sentiment

Jade and Jay reiterate that in a world that often feels like “middle Earth” or a “dumpster,” they and their community aren’t powerless. They urge practical commitment to self and each other—mental health, boundaries, collective care, and joyful resistance—as a form of survival and hope.

“There’s still hope. All is not lost… Now’s the time for us to get connected to one another and valuable information sources, so we know how to fight for our lives, quite literally.”
—Jade (59:24)

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How to Engage

• Send graduation announcements & Honesty Box questions: [e-mail]
• Follow along for more adulting, self-care, and Black woman wisdom every week.

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End of Summary.

Transcript

[Jay]

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[Jade]

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[Jay]

Two step. I see us in the park yes Strolling the summer days of imaginings in my head and words from my heart Told only to the wind Even without being said I don't want to trouble you is my trouble but there's something about your love that makes me weak yes. Knocks me off my feet Take it

[Jade]

away and I don't wanna boy

[Jay]

you

[Jade]

with it oh but I love you I love you I love you hey Steven. More and more.

[Jay]

Steve Lynn, I am so glad you knew I was singing the Stevie version and not the Donnell version.

[Jade]

I know, I know. Anybody else, I wouldn't. But I know if you would never sing Donnell Jones over Stevie.

[Jay]

Not over. And I. And listen, no disrespect to John did. Correct. No. He did a fabulous whiny job with it. I think. You know, he upped the tempo just a tinge and I like the energy. Also.

[Jade]

He. He held it was a respectful integrity of the original song while making it his own and making it, you know, you know, appropriate for the time and the content. He contemporized it in a way that did not mess it up. You see what I'm saying?

[Jay]

No.

[Jade]

So it was clean. It was a good cover.

[Jay]

Three Stevie covers. I can say off the top.

[Jade]

Okay. Okay.

[Jay]

Give it to me that I think were done justice.

[Jade]

Okay.

[Jay]

Donnell Jones.

[Jade]

Yes.

[Jay]

Version of Knock Me Off My Face.

[Jade]

Absolutely.

[Jay]

Jodeci's version of Latent.

[Jade]

Absolutely. Hands down. And of course because JoJo did his singing. Hello. Did he not?

[Jay]

JoJo did he. JoJo did his good singing on there on lately.

[Jade]

Okay.

[Jay]

You better Not. And then. And then. Obviously incomparable Luther Vandross's creep.

[Jade]

Oh. Oh. And, you know, all fabulous, if I am not mistaken. Let me look it up because I don't want to be out here lying, but somebody sent me. Yes. 19 more. I love it. I love it so much.

[Jay]

That was so good to my soul.

[Jade]

That was so. Honor the fact that our Auntie Luther Ronzoni Vandross just had a birthday. You know, his birthday is on 4 20.

[Jay]

Yes. Yes.

[Jade]

It would have been his 75th birthday. And shout out to.

[Jay]

That's so crazy to think about.

[Jade]

Yeah, shout out to Dr. Candice Hall. She was gonna be my. I know. That's right. This week, so we'll get to that. But Dr. Candice hall sent me a. I'mma send it to you, sis. A playlist. Some DJ has done a mix for Luther's 75th birthday, and I was listening to it in a car today, and I think you would enjoy it. I'm going to send it to you right now.

[Jay]

Okay. Please. Yes, I would like to listen to that while I do my deep spring cleaning.

[Jade]

Yes, it was really good.

[Jay]

You know, and Stevie's birthday's coming up.

[Jade]

It is. It totally is.

[Jay]

We are.

[Jade]

We are celebrating. We are celebrating. We are celebrating. But, yes, I would agree with you. That creep. And lately. And Donnell Jones. What is. Knocks me off my feet.

[Jay]

Knocks me off my feet.

[Jade]

Very good. All those stellar covers. Good covers of Steven.

[Jay]

When Casey and JoJo win. Casey and JoJo. Because Jodeci was no mas. You know, generally, we feel like we're missing something. Right?

[Jade]

Yes.

[Jay]

You know, Allah. Right now, apparently Slim and somebody else are touring from 112. The name, I believe. I believe. That is what I read.

[Jade]

Interesting.

[Jay]

You know, and then, like, you know, there's just, you know, Drew Hill likes to swap out.

[Jade]

It's like six of them on stage. Have you seen them recently? It's like the same six people.

[Jay]

I'd rather six than two.

[Jade]

That's fair.

[Jay]

I'd rather six than two. But Casey and Jojo, because I was just telling Antonio about the Ladies Night out tour with Ideal, genuine Casey and Jojo and Donnell Jones.

[Jade]

Okay.

[Jay]

And that was a fabulous concert. My parents took me. It was a fabulous concert. And I was like, Casey and Jojo gave me everything that I needed, even justice. Casey and JoJo.

[Jade]

Yes. Yes, absolutely.

[Jay]

Yeah.

[Jade]

Yes.

[Jay]

Oh, and Tristan and I are going to see Jodeci on Mother's Day.

[Jade]

Oh, that's gonna be so nice, sis. They still do. They still do a good show. But there was a time where New Edition Jodeci and Charlie Wilson was on tour, and me and Tania went over to the Capital One to see them, and they. It was. It was excellent. It was excellent. And I gotta tell you, I gotta tell you, Charlie Wilson was my favorite,

[Jay]

because Charlie Wilson sings down.

[Jade]

And I feel like there's just a level of production and showmanship that, you know, that's sort of like, you know, original. Still give Gap Band, but still give Uncle Charlie, too. It was.

[Jay]

Yes. Yes. Very good, you know. Yes. Cause he's done very well with carrying his solo career, but also honoring. Because the Gap Band has a very, very special place in my heart as you.

[Jade]

Very same.

[Jay]

It has a very special place in

[Jade]

my heart because anytime you could just. Just all. I got that, you know, one of the songs, like, you know, there are certain songs that you only have to hear the first several seconds of, and, you know exactly that guitar and. You can't keep running in and out of my life.

[Jay]

You can't keep running in and out.

[Jade]

The time has come for us to stop messing around.

[Jay]

Hello.

[Jade]

Okay. Don't you know that I like having you around in my life? Hello. Cause you're gonna either have to. You either have to get in or get out. Because you can't keep running.

[Jay]

He did low and then he went high again. You can't keep running. Yes, the time has come.

[Jade]

Yes, the time has come for us. I know that's right. Ooh, it is.

[Jay]

You know, I know we sound of a particular age, but me and my homegirl were talking about today. We were. It's just not. We not get in music like, we're not music before. And I. I didn't even think I would say those words later on in my life, but we're not it. The. In the. To your point about the showmanship.

[Jade]

Yes.

[Jay]

Like, we were talking about it because of the Michael Jackson, and we were like, you know, are there people who perform and they put on shows and you could tell that there's a lot of integrity in their shows. Yes, absolutely. But there is. There was something different about every act that was out.

[Jade]

Oh, my God.

[Jay]

They gave a. About every. Okay. About every detail that was a part of their performance.

[Jade]

Yes.

[Jay]

Like, it wasn't. You know, how now would be like, oh, yeah. Such and such is a dancer. They're not the strongest singer, Right.

[Jade]

No.

[Jay]

These were spinning.

[Jade]

Yeah.

[Jay]

Learning choreography. They were singing songs. They were putting care and into what they did. And we're just not getting. We're just not getting those Even songs are like two minutes now.

[Jade]

Exactly. And it's okay. Exactly. And you know, I wasn't going to talk about this because I just don't even want to give it all of that because there, you know, the group. The group chats have been divided. Not mine. Because, you know, I think all of my core friends are of like mind. But my understanding is that some of the girls have. The group chats have been divided around Chris Brown and Usher. Okay. Because some of the girls are going and other girls are not. Right. And so I will say this. I've seen Usher. I saw him in Vegas. Yeah. I've seen him live a couple of times and it's a decent show. Okay. I've had. I enjoy it myself. I have never.

[Jay]

I saw Usher 8701 and Confessions Truth tour. It was great.

[Jade]

I have not gone to see a Chris Brown show. I cannot speak to sort of the quality of the performance, but I'm sure that he hops around all the time and gives you all of the bells and tricks whistles. I believe that very wholeheartedly.

[Jay]

Yep.

[Jade]

But I also know that his. His albums are longer because it's 23 minute songs versus if you were to. You know what I'm saying, it's. It's 20 songs. They are all 2 minutes and 47 seconds though.

[Jay]

See?

[Jade]

And they. To me, they all sound alike. But I just.

[Jay]

Everything sounds the same now. And I'm not saying this, you know, that it's not catchy.

[Jade]

Yeah.

[Jay]

But I can't endorse that little. I was. My mother was like. She was trying to. She was like, you know, you can get discounted tickets. I said, let. Let me just real quick. She was hitting me in XZ in our group chat and she was like, these. And we were both like, so, yeah, no, no thanks. No Chris Brown. And then I called. She called me and I talked to her on the phone and she was like, so what's the deal? And I told her everything. And she was like, we don't support abuses. And I was like, exactly.

[Jade]

No, quite literally. It's just.

[Jay]

I'm not interested in you, lady.

[Jade]

But I have not seen the Michael movie yet. Not because I don't want to. I just haven't had time to make it down to the theater. But I absolutely plan to. But I will say that just all of the promo and just seeing things online, it make me look up. Now, his movie, the last movie that he did that came out in 2009, that this is it movie that is down to The Tubi. Now, I had went back to the Tubi to watch that movie, and I remember going to the theater to see this is it.

[Jay]

To see this is.

[Jade]

Was. It's just like, oh, my God. First of all, to just watch the way that he. Like, I'm still in awe. And it. It's just like, what. Like the way that his mind worked and how he would work with the. How he would work with the MD and make all of these sounds. But, like, it's like he just.

[Jay]

Virgo genius.

[Jade]

It was outrageous.

[Jay]

He was a musician with his. With his voice, with his mouth.

[Jade]

And that's why I feel like. I think there. There's true artistry. There's lots of people that I feel like study their vocal instruments as it. And play their instruments like it was a saxophone. Like, you know, that's where.

[Jay]

You know what I'm saying?

[Jade]

Like. Like, those are people. Like, I like Beyonce. I feel like Beyonce can make her body make any sound because she knows her.

[Jay]

When she did the guitar on. On I. I wait.

[Jade]

I care.

[Jay]

Yeah, on I care. That motherfucking voice with that guitar.

[Jade]

Exactly. Exactly. There's few people. I think Duran Bernard could do it. There's few people who have the capacity who like, literally play their vocal instruments like it was a piano. And that's when you're at.

[Jay]

And Michael was very much that.

[Jade]

It's like a level of mastery that I think you achieve. You know what I'm saying? When you have that kind of body awareness and pitch, you know, you can do anything I. That. So that's the kind of. Like, I love watching that kind of stuff. And so, you know, I've heard mixed reviews. I'm gonna go see the Michael movie for myself. But I've heard mixed reviews.

[Jay]

I feel like the written reviews are different than the vocal reviews that I'm hearing. And so I actually had zero intention of going to see the movie because if I'm gonna be perfectly honest with you, a. I hate biopics. I hate them.

[Jade]

Yeah, I get that.

[Jay]

Well, let me not say that they must be well done and oftentimes are not.

[Jade]

Yes.

[Jay]

I promised myself many years ago I would not watch a Whitney Houston, Michael Jackson or Prince by Biopic. Biopic. Whatever you want to call it. And then the only other Michael Jackson movie to exist for me is Jackson

[Jade]

5 An American Dream. I mean, honestly, that's why all to me, all the other.

[Jay]

Go down to the store, baby and give me some butter this is what I'm saying. Like, there. It's hard to Live up to that.

[Jade]

It's like, there's not going to be another Michael Jackson biopic that would be comparable to the Jackson 5American dream. So it's like, why do y' all keep doing this? Is what I would like to know. Like, so. And I think this is. It was different because it wasn't a biopic. We were literally like. It was like a documentary of Michael or Tour.

[Jay]

Yeah.

[Jade]

Which I could get with.

[Jay]

Yes, right. Exactly. Yeah, exactly. Very different.

[Jade]

Very different.

[Jay]

And the man on the moon was just. Or Moonwalker was just weird, but

[Jade]

it was kind of strange. And I just thought maybe. I always felt like maybe I'm just not adult enough. Am I a kid? Like something.

[Jay]

It just got right over. First of all, you know me. You know, I'm the weirdest, most autistic, most out of the box, Cartoon network ass, robot chicken nigga, you know that. You know, I can get into some weird shit. I don't have no problem with it. Moonwalker was weird, strange.

[Jade]

You know, it was the claymation.

[Jay]

What was.

[Jade]

The claymation was always just like, wait a second.

[Jay]

Yeah, hold on. It was jarring. It was jarring.

[Jade]

Hold on, hold on.

[Jay]

It didn't sit well in my spirit. Hold on.

[Jade]

I'm very concerned. What exactly are we doing? What's happening?

[Jay]

But everybody who I know who has told me about this movie is like, I trust these.

[Jade]

Yeah.

[Jay]

So I'm like, all right, I will go and see it. They said his nephew Jafar, one of Jermaine's sons, did a. And I should have known by the name, because at first I was like, whose son is it? And they told me, I said, it is Jermaine's son. I know it was your majesty. I remember hearing your majesty for the first time. It being. Do you hear me, first of all. But I said, they said his nephew did very well by him.

[Jade]

Yes.

[Jay]

I. I love Colman Domingo. I think he does a fantastic job in everything.

[Jade]

And I want to see Nia as captain. That's something I want.

[Jay]

And I want to see Nia as cast. Yeah. We didn't think we would get that kind of role from Nia.

[Jade]

Exactly.

[Jay]

So I'm excited for that. And I heard that the. The. The. The sound is just.

[Jade]

Oh, God. Yes.

[Jay]

The soundscape is just phenomenal. And I remember when we went to go see MJ the Musical, and that soundscape was phenomenal.

[Jade]

Yes.

[Jay]

So, yes. If I get a Liberian girl,

[Jade]

I just remember. I don't know what song it was, but I looked up, looked over, and Fran was On her feet. I said stand up.

[Jay]

It was not Earth song. Wait, hold on. Yes. Wait. Oh, my God. It's not Earth song. Wait, is it Earth song? I don't think it was.

[Jade]

No, I think it was something.

[Jay]

No, it was. Oh, it's. Oh, my God. Oh, my God. Oh, my God. Hold on. Wait. Hold on. I can tell you. No, it's not. It's not Earth song. It's. Oh, my God.

[Jade]

So good.

[Jay]

Oh, God. Wait, hold on.

[Jade]

Stranger in my sky that's.

[Jay]

That's where she lost. No friend went to White Church. But both those arms went up and the head went down.

[Jade]

Go ahead. I said, my sister is having a time. Okay. I love to see you.

[Jay]

It was very creed with arms wide open.

[Jade]

I love to see if my sister is having a time. That's what I need, period.

[Jay]

I said, friends at Caucasian church right now. This is crazy. We were at a Broadway show, and it was just like, oh, this.

[Jade]

Exactly. Because that's how you have a good time. That's how you listen to Michael Jackson. I remember when I went to see this is it, and then people were sitting in the theater with their arms crossed in their laps. I'm like, are y' all crazy?

[Jay]

How can you do that? I don't want to do that with you. I don't want to do that. That's another thing. I'm gonna enjoy myself at this movie. So everybody in this theater, just get ready.

[Jade]

I know. Cause I done paid $49,000 to get in here. So I'm gonna have a time.

[Jay]

Hello. Okay. And then $15,000 for this chicken sandwich I'm about to enjoy.

[Jade]

So. So. So I'm gonna have a time. I'm gonna enjoy myself, period.

[Jay]

No, we have to come back to this conversation once we both see the movie. Yes, but I do. You know, artists make these songs longer. Like, I don't know where. We collectively agreed that songs were supposed to be 2 minutes, 3 minutes. But I am over it.

[Jade]

What happened?

[Jay]

Juvenile.

[Jade]

It used to be Vance. Juvenile. You come from.

[Jay]

You come from our era. You're older than us, actually. And you came back with a banger. Because let me tell you something. That Correct.

[Jade]

Correct.

[Jay]

That song is my shit. Girl, get on your shit and don't give me no lip. And that nigga gave us a minute and 30 seconds.

[Jade]

It was, like, such a tease. I just thought something was wrong with my phone. I'm looking at it like, no, that can't be it.

[Jay]

I was like, that can't be it. And Megan came on. I said, so we get a verse from Juvenile and a verse from Megan and then that's it. I'm glad you put Megan on the track. Oh, Megan, we're holding you.

[Jade]

Listen, my niece. My niece is going to be all right. You know what I'm saying?

[Jay]

She'll be fine.

[Jade]

She'll be fine.

[Jay]

She's going to be fine.

[Jade]

Okay. She back working.

[Jay]

I know. We hold her tighter because of all that she's doing.

[Jade]

Oh, absolutely. And we're not going to. She's going to be good. Tighter. But she's going to be good.

[Jay]

Yeah.

[Jade]

Okay.

[Jay]

She's going to be good. She's going to be good. Was it Britney? Britney who said that? Clay Thompson.

[Jade]

Oh, yeah.

[Jay]

Caressa Lepore looked like the PBS because. Yeah. Oh yes.

[Jade]

She. She repost posted. Yeah, that. I think I. Is it Caress or.

[Jay]

I don't know.

[Jade]

Caress Leor, I think.

[Jay]

Yes. Oh, she. Who said it originally?

[Jade]

She said it originally. And I mean everyone's going to. We can, we cannot as a people unsee that for the rest of our lives. So we will call that man PBS for the rest of my efforts.

[Jay]

For the rest of his days.

[Jade]

That's it. I just don't know. Pbs, Clay. Yeah. Cuz I mean it's the most accurate thing that I've ever. That I've seen in a good long time.

[Jay]

And you know, my energy is going towards, you know, praying for our young sister who has just gone through so much and gone through so much publicly and you know, I know she has a support system, but she's lost a strong, you know, she's lost a weighty person.

[Jade]

Part of that.

[Jay]

So I don't have time to be hating on this funny looking man. I'm like, you know what, go on about your days. Your dirty dick will fall off because of that. Is going to be your karmic.

[Jade]

Not my concern. He's not my concern in the least. Not my concern that I have. No, she is. Exactly. And she will always be. I'm glad to see.

[Jay]

Yes.

[Jade]

People loving on her, despite all of you ingrates who are just taking this occasion to be the trash that you are.

[Jay]

And this is why we love on her as hard as we do. Because there are people, there are. There are roaches.

[Jade]

It's really just.

[Jay]

But you know what, like academics waiting in the wings but you know, to just dump on her as.

[Jade]

As disturbing as it is to watch, I am glad that these people are showing themselves. Right. So we all know how to handle ourselves moving forward. You know, I'm paying attention. I'm down to the comments with my readers on looking at who is saying what. You see what I'm saying? Because I see all of y', all, okay? Because the misogyny is falling out, okay?

[Jay]

The.

[Jade]

The. The indoctrination is falling out of all of the people. And you got to pay attention.

[Jay]

Always some loose, tittied, pushed back hair, bad body.

[Jade]

I mean, you feel like a bad.

[Jay]

With a bad opinion.

[Jade]

Okay?

[Jay]

Right.

[Jade]

Okay.

[Jay]

Okay.

[Jade]

Giving legs and hips and body.

[Jay]

Like my ignorance.

[Jade]

That's what it always is.

[Jay]

Which, listen, if that's what you want, then great, period. But that's not what you want. That's not what you want. You hate women and therefore, anyway, I hate them. And I wish the worst.

[Jade]

Yeah, but we are holding. We are holding Megan close. We will continue to do that and I pray that, you know, she continues to. To develop, okay, into the icon that she already is. Right? Character wise, talent wise. You know, it's only up for my. For my niece. It's only up. You know what I'm saying? Everybody can't go where you going? And so, you know, we have to deal with this, but we deal with it together. And the people who have her back will have it. And the rest of you guys can play in the traffic as far as I'm concerned. Exactly. There's no need for us to go back and forth about it because I'm not interested in that either. I'm not finna argue with you about it.

[Jay]

No, not at all.

[Jade]

Okay. I'm not finna do that.

[Jay]

No, no, no, no. You can't change the mind of a rat.

[Jade]

Exactly.

[Jay]

You know what I mean?

[Jade]

Okay. People who are committed. You can't. People who are committed to misund. Standing to. To. You know what I'm saying? Like, you're not. You're. You're not here trying to sound reasonable. You trying to sound like DJ academics. And that is not something I'm willing to spend my time arguing against.

[Jay]

And I'm not putting DJ in front of that man's name. And I.

[Jade]

Stop it. Oh, true.

[Jay]

What the hell is wrong with you?

[Jade]

True.

[Jay]

She. She wants so much attention right now. She. Stop. You're acting bad. Oh, you're acting bad. Lay down anyway. Academics. YouTube.

[Jade]

Acting bad. Correct. You're acting poor behavior.

[Jay]

Horrible, Horrible excuse. Poor for a homo sapien.

[Jade]

Poor. Poor behavior. Okay, I have to tell you, I

[Jay]

was just looking on ebay where I go for all kinds of things I love, and there it was, that hologram trading card. One of the rarest. The last one I Needed for my set.

[Jade]

Shiny like the designer handbag of my dream. Dreams. One of a kind.

[Jay]

Ebay had it and now everyone's asking, ooh, where'd you get your windshield wipers? Ebay has all the parts that fit my car. No more annoying, just beautiful.

[Jade]

Millions of finds, each with a story. EBay Things people love you trying to

[Jay]

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[Jade]

Good.

[Jay]

And you know, I don't believe in jeans on a flight. Oh, and I got them in coffee bean brown. I am the after party. Refresh your everyday with luxury you'll actually use. Head to quince.com grown for free shipping on your order and 365 day returns now available in Canada too. That's Q U I n c e.com grown for free shipping and 365 day returns. Quince.com grown.

[Jade]

You doing okay, sis?

[Jay]

I'm doing all, you know, I'm here hanging in and hanging on.

[Jade]

How are you? Same, same and you know, very much the same. I think I, I think I'll say, you know, green grown is growing through some things. Jade is managing stuff, I'm managing stuff. The world is actively burning down around us. If we think about, you know, all that is happening and transpiring, you know, we could get into the details and I, I feel like we will when, when there's time to process and go through all the things. Everything, everything from, you know, what's going on with the Voters rights Act, what's going on, all of these things we will deal with.

[Jay]

We will get to. To the Mission Impossible that was just released. That was filmed at the White House.

[Jade]

Ciao. I theatrics and. And fictional programming.

[Jay]

Like I said, this is not. We're not. We're not living in a real, real world. This was a Chuck Norris television.

[Jade]

Paramount Pictures is what it's giving.

[Jay]

This was like Walker, Texas Ranger. What in the is wrong with that?

[Jade]

I don't know. I just. I think, you know, Jade and I decided a little earlier today that we were going to have a bit of a mini episode. As you know that we are. We are right at the top of Mental Health Awareness Month. Month. May is Mental Health Awareness month. And you know, I just want to say in the spirit of mental health, I want to acknowledge that it's wild and crazy that despite all of the things that are going on in the world that are abnormal, we are expected to continue to move through our lives and responsibilities like everything is normal. And that's not okay. I just want to say that. No, I feel like.

[Jay]

No, it's not.

[Jade]

If you feel like you are being gaslit every time you open your eyes and put your feet on the floor after you get out the bed, it's because you are. It is because you are. And that's just the truth. Okay? So I want to name that in the spirit of your mental health. That is what is happening.

[Jay]

I keep saying that.

[Jade]

Okay? That's what's going on. And if you feel crazy, because all of this is crazy and no matter what the people are, okay, you are not. You are. You have every right to feel however you're feeling. It's just what I would like to open this conversation. Yeah, okay. Yeah, we just have to.

[Jay]

Yeah, absolutely.

[Jade]

We have to.

[Jay]

Because you know, there we have watch. We have been watching multiple genocides. I mean, for years now, like watching it with our eyes. I want to say 70 plus children were just killed in Congo.

[Jade]

Seriously.

[Jay]

You know, literally our government is a like, they are a movie and a bad one. A to be movie. You got. You got white Walker Kirk over there with her sniper hat and her sniper button up her cho. I said, what's this Cholo button up all the way to the neck? You think you.

[Jade]

Me, I can't deal with it.

[Jay]

And she's up there staring into the camera.

[Jade]

It's very strange.

[Jay]

I can't even like a lemur deal with it.

[Jade]

Jay.

[Jay]

It was just like, I'm really.

[Jade]

What is even going on?

[Jay]

All of this is so bad. All of this is so horrible. And the fact that people are actively buying into this shit. There's Latinos and blacks in ice. Ciao, studs. There's stud ice agents. Like everything, like there's just.

[Jade]

I just want to just. Yeah. So when we are living in very much an alternate reality,

[Jay]

it's ghetto.

[Jade]

I wanna be free. So I just feel like May is mental health awareness month. And I think we're not just acknowledging mental health. I think it's time that we make some commitments to do something about it. Yeah. And so we want to just have a quick conversation to make some distinctions around, you know, our actual mental health, what we're committing to, what things we are trying to commit to this month to protect and prioritize it in this cluster of a world that we are negotiating on a daily basis. And we wanted to invite you guys to do that too. I think we talk a lot about self care on the show. Mental health, you know, whether that be, you know, taking care, get your nails done, getting your toes done, doing a facial. Those things are important and they make you feel good. They can, you know, restore you and give you some sense of self and all of that. But you know, that, that, that's important. But it's not necessarily like a committed to your mental health. We're talking about like internal work things that. Habits and practices that, that keep us regulated and grounded and operating in the sense of honesty with yourself. And so sometimes it's the healthiest thing for you to do is to just be honest that. I feel crazy. This feels crazy. Yeah, yeah, I feel completely crazy right now. You know, just saying like, you know, the just naming crazy in the sense of dissonance. Right. Not, you know, just, you know, what I'm feeling, I'm feeling dis ease. I'm feeling all over the place. And just being honest about that is a form of honoring and committing to your mental health. So yeah, I just thought that we would check in really quickly and honor mental health awareness and then maybe share one or two things, specific things that are not necessarily like aspirational but really doable ways that we're going to try to commit to our mental health this month.

[Jay]

Yes, I'm with it. Yeah, I'm with it.

[Jade]

So listen, let's just be honest before we get to the commitments and just talk a little bit about how we're actually feeling right now. Like we like not, you know, one or two sentences, you know, just honestly naming what it is.

[Jay]

Oh, for me, Ross stressed for less.

[Jade]

If stress was a department store,

[Jay]

it would be Ross. Oh my God. So there's this white lady on the Internet. Okay, see this is what I'm talking about with the weird humor. So there's this white lady and she does these personifications of like Marshalls, tj, Maxx and Ross and Burlington. Burlington is like a hot Cheeto girl growing up, right?

[Jade]

Yeah.

[Jay]

Ross is this discombobulated like weird robot slash just wonky.

[Jade]

It's like a Waymo. And she's like a car, like a rock.

[Jay]

Yes.

[Jade]

It's like, it's like. Yes, exactly.

[Jay]

They can't get this right.

[Jade]

Yeah.

[Jay]

And it is the funniest thing get to me and that's how I feel. Like a Ross store. But like Ross is, is stressed.

[Jade]

Yo. I love that. I love that. What about that? I honestly am. I think I. I feel like we say all the time that we're tired, but I want to just name that the kind of. There's. There's a labor with having to sit in abnormal situations. Yeah. And being expected to act like everything

[Jay]

is normal, Drained, exhausted.

[Jade]

In addition to having like, you know, like having to show up at work and do my work, like honoring my responsibilities, fulfilling the tasks and the deliverables that are assigned to me. And that's the level of work. That's a full time job in and of itself. But having to do that on top of and in conjunct like you know, at the same time as having to sit around. Like I'm sitting and I'm going through my emails like normal. When all of like, you know, when my civil liberties are being gutted. Right. Like I'm literally, you know what I'm saying all of the things, you know, and we just showing up to work like, you know, well, I got to get up and go to work tomorrow. I just gotta. And I gotta pay my bills and I, you know, my mortgage is coming out my account and I'm just keeping, you know what I'm saying?

[Jay]

And I'm just. And if I don't, I'll be homeless. On top of all of this other stuff. I was reading about the Voters act, which I want us to have.

[Jade]

Yeah, we will definitely.

[Jay]

Episode.

[Jade]

I think I want to do a little bit more research.

[Jay]

Yes, exactly. You know, and I want to bring somebody.

[Jade]

Yes.

[Jay]

Who can properly explain it. Not with my weed brain, but I. It's very important. This is very important information. Right. And I was reading this and I literally had two thoughts going. First I was like, yo, where the fuck do we live? And then I said, all right, well we need to talk about this on the show. So. And went into work mode.

[Jade]

Yes.

[Jay]

Because I feel like we have a responsibility to, you know, especially since we talk into our community, to talk to our community about the things that directly affect us. Right. But it's just crazy that I can't read that and just process like, yo, we are literally losing liberty protections. And like we are literally watching the Constitution, which. Fuck the Constitution. Let's be very clear here. Fuck everything that this shit was built on. But if we're going to go off of their blueprint and off of the things that they said, they not even following their own shit. And so it's just crazy that I'm sitting here thinking about how to, how to work and talk to my community about this thing and I can't just sit there and process the fact that we are literally going straight, we are in hell and like going to middle Earth and two things have to exist and. And then it's also the first as we record this episode and the rent is due, like quite literally. And then I think about how much my rent is and I talk to some of my friends and my rent is the same as their five bedroom, four bathroom house. You know what I'm saying?

[Jade]

You know, I was just, you know, in community with some folks a few minutes ago. All, all, you know, residents in Maryland, everyone. So we're dealing with all the things, like we all talking about how our, our utility bills are literally doubling. Yeah, yeah. You know, five figure water bill. Huh? Excuse me.

[Jay]

You already know what's happening where they're putting the data center.

[Jade]

Exactly.

[Jay]

Literally closing people's businesses while people are losing. Like, it's insane.

[Jade]

What is awful. What the. So, no, just saying that there is, there's an exhaustion and if I'm honest, like, I just feel like it's wild that in, in addition to sort of managing all of the different moving pieces of my life, I have to do so in a dumpster. And there's never any time to just sort of like hold anything constant to focus on something else. And there's just a level of labor, there's a level of like heaviness that goes with that. It just feels so cumbersome. And I, if I, if I had to sort of, if I had to sum it up into one word, I think I just feel burdened. Like, I feel very like. Yeah, okay. Yeah, that is just laden.

[Jay]

Yeah.

[Jade]

Like heavy laden.

[Jay]

Yeah. And I feel, I feel offended by that too. Right. I feel offended and violated by that. Because we are burdened with. We didn't even ask for. We don't even want it. We're being burdened by just wanting normal

[Jade]

to take care of, you know, just to be. Just to have the space to, like, live our lives. You know what I'm saying? Like, we're just to be ourselves. We are. That's all we've ever asked for, is to just the.

[Jay]

And you all robbed us of that. You robbed us of. Of you. You're. Or you're robbing us of that. You're robbing our children, you're robbing our grandchildren, God forbid, if we ever have any. I don't. Like, I just. It's not funny.

[Jade]

No, but. No, I think it's important to just sort of sit in the reality of that because I think, you know, for me, if I'm not honest about it, I can't, like, talk to God, you know what I'm saying? Like, I need to carry. I need to carry the. The truth of my heart to, you know, who I pray to, you know, like, what's the point of being in relationship with some. With someone who, you know, loves you unconditionally if you can't be your complete honest self with? So it's like I'm bringing all of this to God in a very transparent way and just seeking him for whatever I need to manage this. But the truth in so doing, I'm just naming that it's just heavy and it's hard. And it's hard on my mental health. It's hard on my emotional health. It's just. It's just hard. And so just sharing that out loud, if anybody else is. Is dealing with that. And we encourage you to also take a couple seconds to check in with yourself honestly and just name what it is that you're feeling. Right.

[Jay]

Yeah.

[Jade]

Like, name that. Say that out loud and. And just sit and reflect on what it is and how it's. How it's landing with you. And then we can try to make some commitments to hold space and be kind to ourselves. What are the ways in which we can help to mitigate those feelings? Like, if Jay told me that she was dealing with something difficult, I would do everything I could as a friend to say, okay, so let's think about that. Like what. Like what can we do differently? How can we think about this proactively? So I think it's also good for us to think about that for ourselves. And. Yeah, like, think about.

[Jay]

I agree.

[Jade]

In this, in this time where you can feel really helpless and hopeless, there are small things that maybe they're not even small. There are things that we can do that have an impact and can help to alleviate some of the heaviness and strain in practices, because, you know, the strain is happening all around us. So how do we put practices in place that help us to deal.

[Jay]

Yes.

[Jade]

With the. With what we're. What we're going through, you know, in

[Jay]

addition to everything we just talked about, I'm like, I. Also. My new fear unlocked his dementia. I. I am like, yo, I can't control if I get this, but how can I mitigate this as much as possible? And it was getting a little bit stressful. I think I was getting obsessive with the thoughts of it, and I was like, all right, why don't we switch that into figuring out some healthy ways to help to combat.

[Jade]

Yeah, right.

[Jay]

You can't control what happens, but ways to. To actively try to combat it as much as possible that are realistic and that don't feel stressful, because I can't imagine stress. Healthy is a positive contribution.

[Jade]

Healthy practice to many things. Yes. For your brain. The brain is a muscle. How do we train it? Absolutely.

[Jay]

How do we. And that's exactly what it is. And so I'm retraining that muscle, and I'm doing that. That's actually helping me with my mental health right now because I'm like, all right, what are. So I started. I was like, what are things? I was like, things you already know. Read. Yeah. Do some sudoku puzzles. Do you know, you have to. You got to do the little cognitive things, right? You gotta. You gotta be able to tap the fingers. You gotta do that throughout the day. Stack some coins. Do you have to do aerobics? You gotta work out.

[Jade]

And I'm like, little things that digital stuff have, you know, like, when's the last time we memorized something? You know what I'm saying? You know, we used to have to memorize phone numbers and addresses and directions. And now, you know, I speak for myself. Every time I get in the car, I turn the GPS on, not because I don't know where I'm going, but, like, I have sort of been conditioned to. To rely on it, to sort of give me a heads up about traffic or to let me know what's coming. But, like, sometimes I try to drive home, you know, without any of that, just. Just to make sure that no matter where I am, muscle memory, I can figure out how to get home. You know what I'm saying? Absolutely. So all that stuff, like, you know, I try to make myself remember my mom's phone number. You know, I try to, you know, and I think about like emergency contact. Like, you know, not just my mom, but like, who else? Who else? Name and number can I memorize if for whatever reason I'm somewhere and I don't have access to my phone and I need to call you, like, you know what I'm saying? Let me, Let me commit, actually.

[Jay]

Really.

[Jade]

Exactly. Let me commit. Let me write some shit down. I think, you know, like you said, not only reading, but writing. Like I'm trying to make it a point to pick up a pen and write every day.

[Jay]

Yes. And build my hand muscles back up position. Right.

[Jade]

My handwriting is getting progressively worse and I think it's.

[Jay]

Let me tell you something. I used to rattle off of phone numbers easily like, like nobody's business. Do you hear me?

[Jade]

I thought about too. Even back in the times, you know, I used to know the trains so good. I used to knew. Know which trains were where and what time they were coming and how long they were running or when they started running local like I used to. This is stuff you used to know, like the back of your head.

[Jay]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Jade]

And I just don't know.

[Jay]

We didn't have no gps. Yeah, we did not have gps. There was no Google Maps tell you take the, the M46. There was no, there was nothing to tell you that you just knew.

[Jade]

Yes.

[Jay]

So I had to. I actually, I also really have been back on my public transportation steez to travel around. You know, I'm like, all right, let's. And like the buses. Yeah, I'm getting on the bus again. Like, I'm like, all right, let's, let's, let's pounce around the city. Like we have to like, let's, you know what I'm saying? Get your muscle memory back up with stuff. Like I'm just really trying. I'm really trying to be very intentional about that because I know it's going to pay off in the long run, but it's also just good for me.

[Jade]

Yeah.

[Jay]

It's good for my mental health now.

[Jade]

Yeah. For sure. So in addition to that, I think one of the things I'm trying to do is be more intentional about my boundaries, not with just like for myself. And I know one of the ones that I really, really struggle with. And I, I've been. I. Fran is my accountability partner for this one because I love that Fran. I think Fran has a healthy relationship with her phone.

[Jay]

Yeah.

[Jade]

And I honestly aspire because one of the things that I get caught up in. I'm a scroller. I'm a scroller, and it doesn't take long for me to get caught up in the scroll. And. And hours have passed, and it's really bad at night. And so it's like, affecting my sleep. Sleep quality in a way, because, you know, you're just reading and you ingesting all of this information, and it. And for somebody like me, whose mind struggles to turn off anyway, it just doesn't. It just doesn't help. And so in the month of May, I want to be really intentional is. Stop. Stop scrolling at night. So I'm like, be intentional. Fran said that she started charging her phone in a different room. And I think that I might. I might try that on for size. I really think I might.

[Jay]

It's really good. I don't put mine in a different room for, I guess, emergency purposes. And if I'm being honest, I don't have a separate alarm clock. I said I was gonna get one,

[Jade]

and I. Yeah,

[Jay]

but I. So I use my alarm. But I. I am. I don't sleep with it by my head. I won't sleep with my phone in my bed. Like, I won't sleep with it night right on my nightstand, right next to. To me. That's not good for you. And I love. I love how Fran operates. And Mary. Yeah, Mary won't even. Don't hit her before 11am because she's like, even when I'm up, I want my day to start peacefully. Like, I want to do my routines. She's like, for myself, I want to do my workouts. I want to drink my tonics. I need to do these things, and I don't. And I know that my day will get sucked up by this. If I start off with this, and I'm like, you know what? That's a really good practice, actually. Relief.

[Jade]

I'm committing to that in the month of May, like, trying to get better or, you know, have a. A hard boundary around my phone, particularly at night with respect to me getting rest. And I think also committing to, like you said, designating time for the things that I know reset me and ground me and writing, reflecting, writing in my prayer journal. Having that designated time every day is something that sort of just. It's a way for me to block out all the other stuff that's going on around me. And there are times where I get really good. Like, I'm not the best with routines. I really wish that I was one of those people that could do the same thing every day, but that's never Been who I am. But I really would like to have designated time every day. Doesn't have to be the same time every day, but to just have some time every day where I spend time, you know, reflecting, praying. Because that. That is something that recalibrates me.

[Jay]

Yeah.

[Jade]

And so I used. I feel like I have ebbs and flows and some seasons. I'm really good, and then something will happen. But I think, like, since losing DDA, I got. I got off my rhythm real bad, and I really want to. Because, you know, sometimes you just. And this is honest. Like, sometimes in grief, it's like. It's not that I don't want to pray, but I don't know what to say. Like, I think I just am dealing with so much. And so it's not that I don't pray, but I think my prayers change in that they are much more. They feel like more short and conversational. Like, they're just kind of like thoughts where I feel like there are other times where I can sit down wherever. Sit down wherever I'm doing. I feel like they're much more structured and not. Not. You know, I don't have. I don't think I shame myself. I don't think that one way is wrong and one way is right. But I. I think that I know that I feel better when I have that time, and so I want to get better about creating time and then just letting that time be what it needs to be. Maybe I'll say it that way.

[Jay]

Absolutely. And I think also when you're praying and you don't have much to say, I think that's okay, too.

[Jade]

Yeah.

[Jay]

I was watching. When I was watching Love on the Spectrum, Tanner, I love him so much. He said they had to teach him, like, you don't have to fill every moment with words. And so. And it doesn't mean something's wrong with you either.

[Jade]

Yeah.

[Jay]

And he. He's a people pleaser, so that's what he would do. And so once he, like, got that in his head, he started. Sometimes on the date, if it would get quiet, he'd go, I'm just quiet because I don't have anything to say right now, but I'm enjoying myself. And they would be like, me, too. And I was like, see, I just. We. If we just be straight up like that sometimes. Yeah, that's all you need. And I can imagine that God, of all people, is not getting ready to be, like, come up.

[Jade]

Exactly. But there's real relationship there. Like, you know, since even, like, you and I, for The thing, there's times when we spend time together and we're talking and then there's times when we spend time together when we're just in the same space.

[Jay]

Yeah.

[Jade]

It's not like, it's like, it's just presence and proximity and that is still closeness. But it's not like, you know, it doesn't have to be like a routine of or of regular things that we say to each other. So that's good. Thank you for that perspective. I think this is good to remember. I know that. But it's just good to sort of remind myself because I think I do. I've sort of. I think it's something I'm working through like as I'm trying to heal from legalism and like conditioning myself to have those limited ways of thinking about doing right or what is right and what is wrong. In that way. It's easy to sort of feel like, oh man, I did not have my prayer time today. But sometimes it's just like, no, yeah. It's like you might not have sat down and, and wrote a three page reflection, but you know, there's still time in God's presence. You know, it's still like feeling. You know what I'm saying? Like you could. Sometimes it's just. Yeah. Like that you think spirit is getting

[Jay]

ready to watch you have a stressful day. Know and know you on the brink and be like, yeah. Hello.

[Jade]

Hello.

[Jay]

So you know, just a little less pressure. This is it.

[Jade]

Should.

[Jay]

That should never be a relationship with. With pressure on it.

[Jade]

No.

[Jay]

You know what I'm saying?

[Jade]

For sure. No relationship. I feel like. No, no relationships that feel good or that are good or the best relationship should ever feel like pressure.

[Jay]

No, no, they should.

[Jade]

Yeah.

[Jay]

They should not.

[Jade]

Yeah.

[Jay]

They should feel easeful. You know what I'm saying?

[Jade]

Like a. Yeah.

[Jay]

Bomb for your spirit.

[Jade]

For sure. So. Yeah. Any. So I would love to know if you have any other commitments to share them, but I think also want to open it up to our community. Like, you know, what are things that you're committed to this month? Anything that small things, whether it's being. You're gonna, you're gonna have a conversation that you've been avoiding that's been on your mind for a long time. It eats up a lot of your mental capacity. Maybe you just need to go on and. Yeah, yeah. And maybe it's like I'm logging on. Exactly. Maybe it's like when I'm off of work at 5 o', clock, I'm off work, I'm Not. I'm not doing anything after that. That's a. That's a good boundary.

[Jay]

Yes, it is. I, I. Yeah. Though I think I said what mine are. Yeah. And also feeding myself during the day. I have told you all on countless occasions.

[Jade]

Yeah.

[Jay]

I am the worst day non eater. I do not eat. So I have been intentionally being like, all right, I told you I was making bone broth. So I've been doing my bone broth. I got a new batch of stuff ready to make a new batch of kimchi. I've been doing yogurt, and. And it's not called Mussolini. It's like musli. It's some kind of granola. But I keep calling it Mussolini, and I keep doing that with the yogurt. Blackberries, and. And I'm just like, you know, and the other day, I looked up and I was like, look at you eating all day.

[Jade]

Eat.

[Jay]

That's okay.

[Jade]

I love to see it.

[Jay]

But it was, like, a struggle for. I said, why is it a struggle for me to feed myself during the day? This is insane. What is that? So I as crazy someone who loves

[Jade]

food as much as me.

[Jay]

No. Kia knows I will cook a spread for everybody, and then I will watch. Eat. I'd be like, exactly. Chew. It's so dumb.

[Jade]

Jake is so exact excited if you have. If she has prepared food and she is watching you enjoy it, like, she literally lights up, like, from the inside.

[Jay]

Yeah. Won't feed myself. Might pass out in the middle of watching you. But you'll eat good.

[Jade]

You will. You will.

[Jay]

So, yeah, I just want to. I just want to be. I want to take care of myself.

[Jade]

Yes.

[Jay]

You know what I'm saying? Because I don't know what the fuck this shit is about to look like. But if I'm just acting as if, you know, we'll have a world, you know, when I'm 80, I'd like to be there, so. And I'd like to not have that old black lady shuffle. You know what I'm saying? God bless our elders. I love y' all so much. But I'm like, you know, you should have been on that treadmill, girl. Them joints would be as tight as they are. And so I'm like, all right, let me. Let me work on that shit now. Cause it's gonna sneak up on me, and I'm gonna have the black lady shot. Old black ladies.

[Jade]

It's wild. It's a wild time.

[Jay]

Yeah.

[Jade]

But no, we just wanted to check in really quickly with you guys. I know we've been doing. We've had some dope conversations and we have some more to come, but this just felt like a good way to kick off Mental Health Awareness Month. We also know that May is also. Graduation season is upon us.

[Jay]

Yeah.

[Jade]

It's our favorite time of the year,

[Jay]

our most wonderful time. Sorry, I can't help it.

[Jade]

For sure. So, yeah, it's graduation season, so y' all know what to do. Send your graduation announcements of any kind to hello Getting Grown Co. And we will start to read all of the accolades and accomplishments on the air.

[Jay]

Yes. I want to say that we are going to get started with graduation announcements by the 15th sister. Is that.

[Jade]

Yeah, let's get it going.

[Jay]

They have all. You have your. Not all your submissions. Start. Your submissions.

[Jade]

Send them. Start to send them in. Start to send them in.

[Jay]

You know, so that they can drop on the episode that drops on the 19th of May. Remember, we come out on Tuesdays.

[Jade]

Yeah.

[Jay]

And then from there, we're gonna do a solid month of graduation announcements. So you got four. Yes, we will get your graduation announcement in. Once again, hello. getting grown co. And honesty box is not gone. You know, I know we haven't put as much focus into it.

[Jade]

Yeah.

[Jay]

But please continue to send your Honesty Box questions to hello, Getting Grown Co as well.

[Jade]

For sure.

[Jay]

And I think we're just gonna dip ourselves on up out of here. Is there anything else that you are committed to doing before we roll?

[Jade]

No, that's it. I'm. I'm like, like, you know, like. What did I say? Scrolling. Not. Not scrolling. At night. And then committed to my reflection and my rest. That's how I'm trying to take care of myself.

[Jay]

Yes.

[Jade]

And you're going to feed yourself every day, take care of yourself and.

[Jay]

And read.

[Jade]

You're going to read your books. We're going to exercise our brains. Okay. We're going to take care of ourselves. Yes. Well, cardiovascular.

[Jay]

Cardiovascular health.

[Jade]

It's a lot happening, but we are in it together as always. As Jay said, we know. An honor. We're not ignorant to our commitment. We always commit to talking about all the things at the kitchen table, processing through all of this together. And so we are. We got lots of good conversations in the pipeline to dig into what's happening in the world, not only to keep us informed, but to also help us to know how we might be proactive. Because what I'm learning is that even though this feels terrible and it feels like things are being eliminated left and right, because they are, you know, we still have options. There's still hope all is not lost. We have got to get out here. They want us to think that.

[Jay]

Yeah, they do.

[Jade]

They want us to think that they do. But now's the time for us to get connected to one another and to, you know, valuable information sources so that we might know how we might do what we got to do to. To fight for our lives, quite literally.

[Jay]

Yeah. And, you know, to your point, actually, with that being said, listen, I. This is not by any means condoning, excusing, justifying. No. What they're doing. But I have to say, as we are quickly headed into the early 1960s, you know, on the legal side of things. Civil. Civil. Rightly, that also was a time, if I. You know, if I'm going to switch my perspective a little bit, where we were much tighter as a community as. As. Absolutely. And I think that because of what has been fostered. Let's be very clear here, like, this is by design, this. This level of independence, this. This disassociation from other human beings that is really their culture. Because if you think about it, I was reading a thread the other day about how in Sweden won't. If a kid is over doing homework with their kid, they ain't gonna feed that dinner. I said, what? But anyway, what I say all that to say, you know, like, even not knowing our neighbors, even, you know, just. Just. Just this spirit of solitude and independence, it. It has really taken us away from pouring into the community that we once were. Yeah. You know what I'm saying? I know, I know. Yes, there are who go to church, but not everybody goes to church like they used to go to church. And, And I get it. You know, people have found their own spiritual practices and all that, and that's cool. Church was also a space for community, you know what I'm saying? So I'm. I'm. We have to find intentional ways to foster. To truly, truly, truly foster.

[Jade]

Absolutely.

[Jay]

And be a village and a community together. And I think if this is gonna continue on the way that it is, then if we're gonna take anything away from that, let it be that.

[Jade]

Yeah, I'm with it. And we will be back next week, y'. All. Thank y' all for tuning in. We just wanted to do a quick little check in. Getting grown style.

[Jay]

Yeah, but it's been an hour, so it really wasn't that quick.

[Jade]

I know, but, you know, but here we. What can we say? Exactly. What can we say when we get to the kitchen table, we get to yapping.

[Jay]

We get to yapping. So we'll save our self cares and our petty peeves. We'll save all of that for next week.

[Jade]

Yeah, man.

[Jay]

But we did want to come have a chit a chat with you all if that was cool.

[Jade]

For sure. We hope that you had a good time. Thanks for spending an hour with us and as always. Yeah, I could take them out. Sis, please take them out for sure. As always, make sure that you are moisturizing your mind. Okay? You want to do that by taking care of the business that is yours and yours alone. All right? Worry about yourselves and your people. Our people.

[Jay]

Yes.

[Jade]

You also want to moisturize your insides by drinking just as much water as your body can sustain every day. I mean, just drink. Just guzzle it right down. Yeah, because that's how you keep yourself hydrated. And you also want to moisturize your skin because your black will crack if it is dry.

[Jay]

Yuck. Isn't that a nasty. Look at me.

[Jade]

Like. You are the same color as the inside of your hands. Wow.

[Jay]

That is crazy. I am. That's crazy.

[Jade]

That's your winter color.

[Jay]

Oh, my God.

[Jade]

She's a wizard. Bye, y'. All.

[Jay]

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[Jade]

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[Jay]

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[Jade]

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[Jay]

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