Alcohol Sucks | Girls Gone Bible

Summary

Girls Gone Bible: "Alcohol Sucks" (October 10, 2025)

Main Theme / Purpose

This episode, hosted by Angela Halili and Arielle Reitsma, centers on the theme of sobriety and overcoming addiction—specifically alcohol, but also touching on drugs, smoking, and other vices. With raw honesty, the hosts dive into Angela's personal story of alcoholism, the spiritual dynamics behind addiction, and how true freedom and healing ultimately come from Jesus. Their aim is to encourage those struggling with addiction, debunk common misconceptions, and point to lasting transformation through faith rather than willpower or programs alone.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

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1. Opening & Purpose of the Episode

• Angela shares having specifically prayed for this episode to go viral so that more people might hear a message about sobriety and encounter freedom (04:00).
• The hosts acknowledge how hard and vulnerable it is to discuss these topics, but stress how many are suffering in silence, even within the Christian community.

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2. Angela’s Story: Addiction and Deliverance

Early Exposure and Escalation

• Angela began drinking at 15, not out of a love for partying but to escape from deep-seated pain and anxiety (18:00).
  • “It’s not even that I loved to party. What I loved was the ability alcohol gave me to escape my pain.” – Angela (18:45)
• Drinking escalated through her teens and into her early 20s as a coping mechanism for social anxiety and panic disorder.

Recognizing Addiction

• Angela describes rising tolerance and physical dependence to the point of experiencing withdrawal symptoms if she went short periods without drinking (21:00).
  • “It was absolutely terrifying to realize that I couldn’t even take a short trip to the grocery store without having a drink. The shackles were tight. I was in bondage, and the future did not look promising at this point.” – Angela (21:38)
• She explains the vicious shame cycle: drinking to numb pain leads to more shame, which leads back to drinking (22:30).
• She notes that past trauma and pain often underpin addiction. “People are in pain and they’re hurting so badly. And it feels so good to have a vice… but it doesn’t actually ever bring fulfillment or peace.” (23:40)

Hitting Rock Bottom

• After a toxic relationship and living in an unhealthy party environment, Angela realized she had lost control. Her dependence was less about the fun and more about desperately seeking relief (30:00).

Turning Point: Supernatural Deliverance

• Thanksgiving 2019: Angela is confronted by her then-boyfriend about her ongoing drinking. He gives her an ultimatum, and Angela is so defeated by her actions and caught in self-hatred, but “never drank again after that day” (38:15).
  • “It wasn’t a big moment. I simply stopped that night… It was empowerment. This is the Holy Spirit’s power at work in our life. I never made the decision to stop drinking.” – Angela (43:12)
• Although she endured difficult withdrawals, she testifies to supernatural intervention:
  • “Jesus stepped in and said, you can’t save yourself. You’re done. I’m saving you.” (41:44)
• Now nearly six years sober, she says: “I don’t even consider myself like a recovering alcoholic, because I was delivered from alcoholism, I was delivered from addiction.” (33:25)

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3. Importance of Community and Environment

• Angela explains that she lost all her friends during early sobriety; she quit bottle service and cut off unhealthy environments (48:53).
• “Your friends in your environment are literally everything.” – Angela (48:59)
• She emphasizes need for new, supportive circles, even if it means intense isolation at first. Healing takes time and often requires separating from people/places that enable addiction.

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4. Resources: Rehab, AA, and the Spiritual Root

• Arielle shares that addiction runs in her family and recognizes the place of treatment programs: “I mean, rehab saved my dad. AA truly saved my dad. It gave him community. It showed him the Bible.” (58:11)
• Ari shares a powerful letter from Angelica, a woman who found freedom from addiction after discovering Christ. Angelica underscores that while support groups help, the deepest root is spiritual:
  • “Addiction at its root is so deeply, spiritually connected to the deceptions and the lies that we believe about ourselves, about this life, and about God.” (59:10)
  • “True freedom then comes only when we surrender that mindset and truly accept who God truly is.” (60:33)
• Hosts clarify the nuance in AA’s “higher power” teaching:
  • “Your true freedom will never come from a higher power... You either put your faith in Jesus, or you’re believing a lie.” – Angela (61:34)

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5. Biblical Insight & Warning

• Highlighting Ephesians 5:18: “Do not get drunk on wine, which leads to debauchery. Instead, be filled with the Spirit.”
• Proverbs 23 and Genesis 9 (Noah’s story) are read as clear biblical warnings about the destructive aftermath of drunkenness (55:25, 63:59).
• The hosts distinguish: “Alcohol is not a sin. Being drunk is a sin... However, looking to anything other than Jesus for comfort is a sin.” – Angela (62:04)

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6. How to Walk Out Freedom

• The process isn’t always instant; healing can be gradual and requires ongoing surrender.
• Angela advises removing yourself from triggers and unhealthy influences: “You can lovingly say, ‘I love you, but this doesn’t work for me.’ ...You have to get out of situations that aren’t good for you. It’s life or death.” (53:02)
• “Environments and people are everything for healing. You can’t do it alone.” – Angela & Arielle (63:06)

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7. Encouragement and Invitation

• Angela and Arielle repeatedly remind listeners that no one is too far gone. “Even Noah, who was so obedient, so faithful—he fell.” – Arielle (66:19)
• If you fall back into addiction, “just get back up. You can get sober again, you can lay it down again.” – Angela (67:56)
• Sobriety is not only about abstaining, but also about laying every dependence at the feet of Jesus:
  • “If you’re craving anything other than Jesus, you’re worshiping that thing and it’s idolatry and it will lead you to death.” – Angela (67:53)
• They end with a prayer for supernatural breakthrough and invite listeners to accept Christ for true freedom (71:30–74:00).

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Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• “It feels so good to have a vice... until it turns on you. This is how the devil works, not just with substance abuse but any sin in our lives. It’s always good in the beginning, shiny, appealing, seductive. But then Satan leads you to your destruction by the very thing that used to feel so good.” – Angela (19:18)
• “Jesus is, and forever will be, stronger than whatever is in your life. He’s already put it under His feet.” – Angela (45:56)
• “You don’t know how many people you help. Like, you don’t know how many people you free... you don’t know what you’re doing for those people.” – Arielle (46:38)
• “Addiction at its root is so deeply, spiritually connected to the deceptions and lies that we believe about ourselves, about this life, and about God.” – Angelica, as read by Arielle (59:24)
• “Alcohol is not a sin. Being drunk is a sin... However, looking to anything other than Jesus for comfort is a sin.” – Angela (62:04)
• “You have authority, and it will not have a hold over you anymore after today.” – Angela (46:10)
• “If you are dealing with addiction, you need to be surrounded. You need these people to hold you up and carry you through. That’s why people have sponsors.” – Arielle (63:53)
• “If you did give in again, just... get sober again, just lay it down again, just submit it to Jesus once again. You can get sober again, you can lay it down again.” – Angela (67:56)

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Timestamps for Important Segments

• 04:00: Angela prays for the episode to go viral for the sake of the sobriety message
• 18:00–22:00: Angela describes her earliest drinking experiences and the development of her addiction
• 30:00–34:00: The “dark brick house”—Angela’s low point and realization of bondage
• 38:15–43:12: Thanksgiving confrontation and the moment of deliverance from alcohol
• 48:53–53:02: Post-deliverance: How Angela’s life changed, the importance of environment, and isolation vs. community
• 55:04–62:04: Arielle’s experience with addiction in her family, AA, and the necessity of a Christ-centered approach to overcoming addiction
• 62:04–67:56: Alcohol and sin; the line between moderation and idolatry; responses to relapse; biblical warnings (Noah, Proverbs)
• 71:30–74:00: Prayer for listeners seeking freedom and an invitation to know Jesus

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Final Takeaways

• Sobriety is possible even from deep addiction—Angela's story testifies to the transformative and freeing power of Jesus over every bondage.
• Addiction is often rooted in pain and spiritual wounds, not simply “bad choices.”
• Secular supports (like AA or rehab) are valuable, but true and lasting freedom comes when surrendering all to Christ.
• Community and environment play a pivotal role in both falling into and breaking free from addiction.
• Listeners are invited to make a clear decision, seek supportive community, and place their dependence completely on Jesus.

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If You’re Struggling...

The hosts encourage you: You’re not alone, you’re not too far gone, and help is possible starting today. Their stories, both personal and from community, echo the truth: “Go be free. May the Lord bless you and keep you... We love you so much.” (75:59)

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Resource Links Mentioned

• Girls Gone Bible Devotional
• Angela and Arielle’s Instagram: @angelahalili @ariellereitsma

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Transcript

[A]

Morning Zoe. Got donuts. Jeff Bridges, why are you still living above our garage? Well, I dig the mattress and I want to be in a T mobile commercial like you teach me. So Dana. Oh no, I'm not really prepared.

[B]

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Get the funds as soon as the same day you sign. Visit sofi.compower to learn more. That's s o-f I.com P-O-W-E-R loans originated by Sofi Bank NA member FDIC terms and conditions apply NMLS 696891 foreign hi guys, I'm Ang. And I'm Ari and this is Girls Gone Bible. We are a faith based podcast where we talk all things spirituality, mental health, relationships. We talk about everything from a biblical point of view because we love Jesus so much. We are just two average girls. I don't know why I thought to myself below average. That's why.

[B]

Why do we have to absolutely like.

[A]

Destroy ourselves during the info? We were murderers. So you're not alone. We talk about everything from a biblical point of view because we love Jesus so much. He saved our lives, transformed our lives. And we always say come as you are, just don't stay that way.

[B]

What's up Ange?

[A]

What's up va?

[B]

How are you doing?

[A]

I'm doing really good other than the.

[B]

Fact that I came 40 minutes late.

[A]

Ari thought we were starting at 2:30. We were starting at 2, but I was five minutes late, so. You're only 35 minutes late.

[B]

And one of my green flags I'm gonna give to myself is that. Yeah, I'm always. If you tell me to be there at 2, I'll be there at 1:30.

[A]

Yeah, that is a green flag. That is my green flag. You're always early. You're always on time. You are a respecter of time.

[B]

I am a respecter of. I got a haircut today. My appointment was at 9. I got there at 8:20. I sat outside her thing. What is that?

[A]

Is there a digest for that?

[B]

I just don't want to be. What's the word?

[A]

Disrespectful.

[B]

Like, you know, something of your time. Inconsiderate.

[A]

Yeah, that's a great word.

[B]

That's a really simple word.

[A]

I couldn't get out. Am I ever just gonna be able.

[B]

To say the word?

[A]

That's a great word.

[B]

That's a great word.

[A]

I love your haircut.

[B]

Thank you. What's the word you said in our prayer? I wanted to. Vitality. Was it?

[A]

Oh, no. Virality.

[B]

That's a really good word. Explain to us what that means. You had to see us in my. When you were praying. I opened up one night ago.

[A]

Really? Virality is something going viral. And so I prayed right now before we started this episode. And I prayed a lot this morning. I pray typically over every episode, hopefully, you know, but today was a really important one for both Ari and I where I pray today. I never pray that God would, like, give us more eyes or more views or have more people watch the podcast, but I literally prayed and I think he would release me to say that, like this morning, I prayed for favor on this episode. I prayed for virality. That an episode like today where talking about sobriety and alcohol and drugs and smoking and a bunch of things, I prayed, lord, like, I unashamedly ask for favor. And then this episode would go viral. That parts of this episode would go viral so that people could hear a message like this and that there would just be a call to sobriety and a call to laying down of the things that we know are not good for us.

[B]

Let's get into it.

[A]

Let's get into a ger.

[B]

So I know that you wrote a devotion solely on sobriety. So why don't we get into it? Because I think it's your best. I think it's your best devotion. Really? Yeah. I love when you talk about sobriety because I Know how many people it's freed. And I know that couldn't have been easy to come out and talk about sobriety.

[A]

Yeah. Thank you for saying that.

[B]

But I know how much it's freed, you even being so vulnerable and talking about it.

[A]

So I remember maybe one of our first, like, maybe the sixth or something episode was sobriety. Do you remember how much I was freaking out being like, ari, what are we doing? I, like, went into my story of how much I drank and the little alcohol bottles and how I was an alcoholic and it was really bad. And I remember freaking out. And it's so funny looking back now, being like, now we've told everything and yes, we have, you know, and, like, we have no issue, like, disclosing thing and that. Back then, I just remember talking about my sobriety because I had never talked about it on Instagram. Nobody knew I was sober. Really quick, I want to say, look at us. Look at Luz. What is Luz do? I just want you guys to know we just had a meeting for this book for our devotional today with our team. And, like, you guys, they're ecstatic. I'm just going to go out and say, because we should celebrate our devotional, that we put our blood, sweat, and tears into writing. This was so beautiful and so hard. We could have never prepared. Do you know how much it hurts your head to write so many words? We had a meeting, and our team is just, like, ecstatic because it's. People are loving it and people are buying it, and people are, like, getting transformed through this devotional. And we could have never thought that.

[B]

I remember there were so many moments, like, especially with the purity, devotion. I, like, erased the whole thing. I was like, I'm not putting this out there. And then I just felt that conviction of, like, no, you're putting it in there. And thank God we did. Those hard parts seemed so embarrassing, and so many people were like, no, I relate to this. Even with sobriety, I feel like it's helped so many people open up and be able to. Who's calling us? Who's calling us? Answer it. Everybody wants them on.

[A]

Babe, you're on. You're on the air. Sing him a song.

[B]

Sing us a song.

[A]

All right, give me a word. He's so sick. He's so sick. He had mucus coming out of his eyes. Listen, I need all 15.5 million of you subscribers praying for me. Oh, guys, pray for John because he's feeling sick. You must be better. Is Jesse there? No, it's not. Oh, shoot.

[B]

Oh, shoot.

[A]

I don't know him. Okay.

[B]

Love you. Are you gonna come on soon? Are you gonna come on soon and speak in tongues? He speaks in tongues over all the seats at our shows. It's the best thing ever. Never in English.

[A]

Never in English only.

[B]

You want to say a little something?

[A]

Only what? The spirit of the Lord saying.

[B]

We're talking about sobriety today. If there's anything you have to say.

[A]

Yeah. What would you tell the kids?

[B]

It ain't worth. Really isn't worth it.

[A]

I promise you guys. This is a mighty man of God, but doesn't like to.

[B]

What do you mean? The best advice is not worth it? I know it isn't worth it. If you play.

[A]

If you play with fire, kids, you're gonna get burned. Yeah.

[B]

That's really good. Yeah.

[A]

And maybe what's the word of the Lord? What would he say? He'd say, listen, it ain't worth it. Okay, baby, I love you so much. Bye. All right, ladies, real talk. Our hormones run the show more than we'd like to admit. We've had seasons of pms, mood swings, brain fog, and low energy. And honestly, that'll mess with your week. So we need to be taking glow by beam and building better rituals around our cycles. And if this sounds like you, you're not alone. Hormone health issues are all too common in women and rarely discussed. Did you know it's estimated up to 80% of women have a hormonal imbalance? Things like P, mood swings, fatigue, low libido, brain fog, thinning hair, and weak nails can all be signs of imbalance. Well, here's where a Glow comes in. Glow is a women's super powder made with 18 powerhouse ingredients designed to support hormonal balance. And the results? More energy, stronger hair and nails, and metabolism support. 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We love a good snack, but we need something that travels with us, tastes good and doesn't send us into a sugar crash. IQ Bar has become that grab and go for us and we love that. The Ultimate Sampler Pack lets you try everything. Nine IQ Bars, eight IQ Mix sticks and four IQ Joe sticks in one box. The ingredients are clean and easy to understand. No gluten, dairy, soy GMOs or artificial sweeteners. And the lineup hits different needs. IQ Bar is plant protein with more fiber and less sugar than the usual bars. IQ Mix is a zero sugar electrolyte mix that hydrates and supports mood and clarity. And IQ Joe is a smooth instant coffee with 200 milligrams of natural caffeine and really good flavor. Mint Chocolate Chip bars to Blueberry Pomegranate Hydration to Toasted Hazelnut Coffee. It's fun to find your favorite combo. With over 20,000 5 star reviews and counting, more people than ever are fueling their busy lifestyles with IQ Bars, Brain and Body Boosting Bars, Hydration mixes and mushroom coffees. Their ultimate Sampler pack includes all three. Your routine will be IQ Joe in the morning, IQ Bar in your bag. I'm obsessed with the pumpkin one by the way. IQ Mix After a workout, it's so easy to keep up with. And right now, IQ Bar is offering our podcast listeners 20% off all IQ Bar products, including the sampler pack, plus free shipping. To get your 20 off, text GGB to 64,000. Text GGB to 64,000. That's GGB to 64,000. Message and data rates may apply. See terms for details. This is our devotional out of the wilderness. 31 devotions to walk with God through your hardest seasons. Like we said, we love this devotional so much and we are blown away by the impact that it's had. All that matters is that God's in it and that people encounter Jesus through the devotional and we believe that that's happening. But to hear from our team how well it is doing and performing is just like absolutely insane. And we're so grateful to Jesus. And it's just a testament that, like the spirit of or the testimony of Jesus is the spirit of prophecy. Like, this book speaks prophetically into the lives of whoever reads it because it's our testimony of Jesus that speak to them prophetically. It's absolutely amazing. So please get your copy@girlsgone bible.com book and so we're going to start today, you guys. We want to talk about sobriety. We want to talk about alcohol, drugs, smoking weed, smoking cigarettes, vaping, all of the addictions, all of the things, all of the substances that for some people watching, you might have grown up as a Christian or you are born again and really all in with Jesus. And you're like, this is a crazy topic to even talk about because as a Christian, of course nobody does drugs or smokes weed or drinks alcohol. But the truth is we live in a world where lukewarmness is a thing and double mindedness is a thing, and passivity in your faith is a thing where you can be following Jesus and still partaking in activities that are, I believe and Ari believes, so against what God calls us to do. And that's happening with a lot of people all around, all around us. And so we just want to talk about sobriety because it's a huge part of my life. I've been sober. In November, it's going to be six years, which is.

[B]

Oh, my gosh, November.

[A]

Yeah, it's coming up. The cake is coming. The cake.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

It's going to be six years. Six years, which is like, oh, my.

[B]

Gosh, I cannot believe it's going to be six years. Time is literally flying.

[A]

I met you number three.

[B]

Yeah, that's. That's such an accomplishment.

[A]

Six years it's so crazy. Wow.

[B]

Unbelievable. So what a testimony.

[A]

Thanks, AR.

[B]

Seriously, what a testimony it is to so many lives.

[A]

And I can't wait for you guys to hear because as time has gone on, Ari and I talked about this the other day, where as you mature in your faith, you begin to realize more of your own testimony because you're able to look back. The first time I got touched by the Holy Spirit, that I, like, got encountered by the Holy Spirit, the Holy Spirit fell on me. I remember I was thinking about it on my way here. Looking back, I didn't know what was happening. I was listening to a sermon, literally get wrecked by God. Like, literally get brought to my knees. Holy Spirit's on me. I'm crying, I'm shaking. I don't know what to do. I think it's something about the sermon. So I take out my headphone, rewind the sermon, and then put it in my mom's ear and wait for the same to happen to her. I didn't know that I encountered the Holy Spirit. I was just like. What just happened was a girl get up. Yeah, it was Sarah Jakes Roberts. The first time I ever remember getting like.

[B]

It was Girl get Up by Sarah Jakes Roberts. That's where God met her.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

That's unbelievable.

[A]

Isn't that crazy?

[B]

And it was in your house?

[A]

Yeah. My mom was caretaking for a woman named Julie. So we're at Julie's house, and I was just in the bathroom, maybe like, washing my face or something. With headphones in. I get baptized in the Holy Spirit. Baptized. Like the Holy Spirit falls on me. Not because all of us have the Holy Spirit inside of us, but the Holy Spirit came on me. And I didn't know what. I didn't know what being baptized in the Spirit was. So I take out my headphones and then put it in my mom's ear and I just stare at her, waiting for her to experience what I experienced. And she's just like, cool, cool. Like, you know, Isn't that so interesting?

[B]

And then. Why?

[A]

And then I. Over time, that kept happening. I kept getting encountered by the Holy Spirit. I would listen to.

[B]

Was that the day you put the drink down?

[A]

No, no, no, no. This was way after. So this is like. There's, like, process. Yeah.

[B]

It peels you like an onion.

[A]

Peels you like an onion? Literally.

[B]

No, that's how he deals with us. It's like layers. Layers. It doesn't. You know?

[A]

Yeah. Not every. Sometimes people have a story where they give their life to Jesus. They're baptized in the Holy Spirit. They put everything down. They're delivered, freed, saved, transformed. In a moment, I know that people who have that story, that's not either of our stories. It's been a process. He meets us, then he meets us again, then he meets us again. And he chips away at the stuff that's around our heart. You know what I mean? And we're gonna do another episode kind of like all around that. So. So I'm just going to start a little bit out of this devotional. It starts with Ephesians 5, 18. Do not get drunk on wine, which leads to debauchery. Instead, be filled with the spirit. From Angela. Alcohol almost destroyed me. Because of my experience, I have taken a hard stance on over consuming alcohol or any other substance that alters one's state of mind. I hope my story of how alcohol nearly ruined my life sheds light on the effects of this epidemic. Since I was a little girl, a looming feeling of danger has haunted me. I've always felt unsafe, and I've always looked to outside sources to feel secure. My brokenness and pain in this area drove me into the arms of a vice that would never actually fulfill me or bring me lasting comfort. I was only 15 years old when I realized that I really enjoyed drinking. It's not even that I loved to party. What I loved was the ability alcohol gave me to escape my pain. Even at such a young age. Self medicating with alcohol or any substance is all fun and games until it turns on you. It feels like it's helping until it's not. This is how the devil works. Not just with substance abuse, but with any sin in our lives. It's always good in the beginning, shiny and appealing and seductive. But then Satan leads you to your destruction by the very thing that used to feel so good. Anxiety and alcohol were a deadly duo for me. The more I drank, the worse I began to feel when it wore off. Because you guys know that I went through a horrific period of years of anxiety, panic disorder, ocd, derealization, depersonalization. I had a bunch of phobias. Like, I just had so much fear. I was a very fearful person, and I had really bad social anxiety. So the idea of having to be around people was really hard for me. I could barely look people in the eyes. I could not go to a social thing without drinking. And I had a fear of panic attacks, which is literally panic disorder. So I would not leave the house because I was afraid that I'd have a panic attack. And then it says my Tolerance was rising, so I drank more. This is the violently toxic cycle that happens with alcohol. I went from having an unhealthy relationship with alcohol to being completely dependent on it emotionally and physically. One mo. One morning, I went to Whole Foods. I hadn't had a drink yet, and within a few minutes of shopping, withdrawal hit, and I was shaking uncontrollably. My head was pounding and my ears were ringing as I struggled to remember where I'd parked my car. It was absolutely terrifying to realize that I couldn't even take a short trip to the groc store without having a drink. The shackles were tight. I was in bondage, and the future did not look promising at this point. I had everybody close to me praying for me, but I couldn't bring myself to stop. No matter how many times I tried. It hurts my heart to remember how badly I did not want to be doing what I was doing. I just wanted to feel better. I couldn't stand to look at myself in the mirror. And when I did, I didn't recognize the person looking back at me. My eyes were empty and lifeless. There was no joy, no hope in them. I was a dead man walking, and I was really scared. Have you ever asked yourself, how did I get here? How could I have let it get this far? How did I allow it to get this bad? That was where I found myself. I was trapped in an endless cycle. I wanted to numb the underlying pain, so I turned to a vice. The vice produced an immense amount of shame and guilt that I couldn't stand to feel. So I ran back to the vice to drown out the noise and repeat. So this is what my journey with alcohol looks like. And, guys, I want you to know, anybody who struggles with alcohol or substance abuse, it's not for no reason, it's not by accident, and it's not just bad choices in life, which that is a thing, right? I. We have a choice. Regardless of what happened in your childhood, regardless of how you were raised, regardless of abuse and all the things, you have a choice. And a lot of people grow up in really bad situations and still make good choices for their lives. So that's not to say that we're victims to anything that happens. However, if you see someone who is struggling with addiction, who's struggling with alcohol, who's struggling with sin, first we remember that we don't wrestle against flesh and blood, but against principalities and powers. That we have an adversary who's trying to take every single one of us out and every single person, some more than Others grew up experiencing trauma and pain and dysfunction. And so people don't end up in bad situations just because they chose to get there. And so I think that's something that's really important in noting when we're talking about alcohol and we're talking about substance. Like people are in pain and they're hurting so badly. And it feels so good to have a vice. It feels so good to have something to cope with, whether it's alcohol or smoking weed or even vaping or sex or blah, blah, the millions of things. Or being addicted to work and making money. Like everybody wants to have a vice because it does feel like it makes things easier and it doesn't.

[B]

In the moment.

[A]

In the moment it does.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Right, right. But it's a never ending cycle and, and it doesn't actually ever bring fulfillment or peace. It just. Yes, it numbs you for a second. It never frees you. Only Jesus can free you. Only Jesus can bring true comfort. I talk about my testimony a lot, but you know, I grew up in a situation where one thing led to another that led me to living a life of avoidance and escaping. I really have struggled in my life to cope.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Give always escape to something since I was a really little girl.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

And so growing up, experiencing a ton of pain and a ton of confusion and a ton of like, yeah, there's, I'm not going to get into it, but there's like a million reasons why a little girl ends up addicted to alcohol, you know, and, and those things don't happen by accident. And so I found myself, as you guys know, having those panic attacks. My mental health was really bad. I was really scared. Intrusive thoughts. We've talked about intrusive thoughts before. Those unwanted thoughts that like, are persistent that come up and you're like, oh, what was that? That was scary. And I was really struggling in my mind, really afraid. And so I started drinking to numb my pain, to avoid my pain. Alcohol was the only thing that made me feel better. All of my friends drank, you know, sorry.

[B]

This was started in Florida, right?

[A]

Yeah. When I was in high school. From an early age, I mean since 15 years old, drinking with friends, drinking on the beach in Florida, like that was our lives. That was all of our lives. I was no different from other kids, which is so scary and sad that there are 14, 13 year olds. That's the norm today. It's the norm. It's literally the norm. I know. And so, yeah, it started at a really early age. And even then though, I'm Coping. I'm medicating. I'm not well. I'm not feeling good. I don't know. Jesus. And then I grow up and, and all of my friends are doing the same thing that I am. You know, I, and then I moved to LA and everybody drinks. Drinking is the most normal thing. Why would you not drink?

[B]

You're now 20, right?

[A]

Yeah, 18. Okay, so we moved to LA at 18 and then. But even then I recognize I wasn't an alcoholic. But I look back and I recognize that my drinking was different than other people's. Everybody's drinking is bad because it's not good, but mine was different. I remember specifically, you know, Saddle Ranch. Yeah, yeah, yeah. So I remember being at Saddle Ranch when I was like 18 and being with all my friends from college. It was the end of the night. We all had like those, those not mocktails, those cocktails that are like all that sugar.

[B]

Big ones.

[A]

Yeah, those big ones at Saddle Ranch. And it was time to go. It was closing and we were getting up to leave. I remember this so distinctly that everybody sitting with me all got up and they leave their drinks full. And I remember finishing mine and I asked my friend like, why didn't you finish your drink? And she's like, we're just going home. Why would I drink that? I remember clocking to myself, that was not normal, like what I just did. Yeah, and.

[B]

And then you finished it.

[A]

And then I finished it. And that's just like one little instance. But like it's, it was a. It, it's, it showed me like there's. Why are you even finishing that drink when you're just going to go home? You know, that's not normal. That's not good. And then I, for the next couple of years drink on and off. Not like an issue by any means. But then after I had my first panic attack at 19 by 20 years old, I found myself self medicating, which means that I would drink for the purpose of feeling better. I would drink for the purpose of not having social anxiety, thinking I can't be with people. I'm like the most, I've been like the most social person my whole life. And Satan came into my life and literally attacked my strength, which is how much I love people and being with people. And he fed me this lie that I was like a socially anxious person. And he would tell me, like, you're introverted, you don't know how to be with people. You can only be with people if you're drinking. That's the only time you're fun. That's the only time anybody wants to be around you, because that's when you're crazy and fun. And I would be like, yeah, you're right. I should only. I should only be with people if I'm drinking. And then. So I developed a social anxiety where I could only be with people if I was drinking. And that only led me to drink more and more often. Yeah. And then by 22, 23, as most of us know, my story takes a really dark turn where my anxiety was so bad that I couldn't even leave the house. I was, like, no longer a functioning human. I was in a relationship that was really toxic and really bad. I was living with the person. I lived in, like, this big house with a bunch of young people, and I lived with a boyfriend at the time. Just perpetuated this culture of drinking. And it was just so dark. I'll never forget. I lived in this big house and it was, like, all brick. So it was kind of like, dark inside. Like, it was red brick. I always just. It's like. It was like the set of Euphoria. Not, like, doing a bunch of drugs or like, whatever, but it was just dark. And you have young people everywhere, just living this LA life, and they're drinking and this and that. And I am living in this house, and it's so dark. Even the walls were dark.

[B]

Oh, my God.

[A]

Like, I think about this time and. And I didn't have a life, and. And. But the people in the house would drink to, like, party. So they would leave, they would go places, they would, like, have friends. I literally stayed at the house. I didn't want to party. I didn't want to be around people. I simply had a scheduled drink every hour or two. Not because I wanted to be drunk, but because I was not. Okay. I was mentally so gone, so unwell, and. And I, like, borderline started to lose my mind a little bit because of the alcohol. It creates paranoia, it creates delusion, it creates anger. It creates, like, alcohol. Even if you're not drunk but you've been drinking, it changes your personality. Alcohol changes everything, and marijuana changes everything. These things are really bad for you. So then ultimately, ultimately, I get out of this relationship. I move somewhere else. I go back to Florida for a little bit, and then I. This is left back to Florida for, like, a couple of weeks. Yeah. Because I moved out of that house and I went to Florida, and this is, like, kind of embarrassing and. But, like, you know what? There's no shame. I was in a Relationship. And then I literally jumped into another relationship right away. Like literally immediately and totally all of us grown up.

[B]

Yeah, me too.

[A]

Like literally no time in between jump into another relationship and then live with that person's family. And I was talking to John about this the other day actually and I kind of like told him this story of like going from this one house with this one guy in his family, then to another guy in his family. And he literally, with tears in his eyes was like, Ange, you weren't even like looking for boyfriends. You just wanted to be safe. And he's like, you were literally angel on the run. Like one place to another. Where can I find shelter? Where can I find safety? And, and then I start dating someone else and then I'm living in his house. My, my whole life is in shambles. I just got out of a four year relationship and now I'm in it. I was so unwell between the mental health and the alcohol. I was not making my own decisions. I was completely gone. Like I was, was. Even if you're not drinking a lot, alcohol would, will impair your decision making across the board in every area of your life. It'll destroy your relationships, it'll destroy your marriage because you're not yourself.

[B]

You're not, it destroys.

[A]

Even if you're not an alcoholic, but you're drinking often, it will change who you are. And so now I'm at this new person's house and, and in this new relationship and thank you Jesus for that person because it was the best thing that ever happened to me. But im, I'm a 23 year old girl making horrible decisions. I don't know what's going on. I have no guidance. I'm, I'm just. It was a mess. Yeah, it was a mess. And then I've told the story before, so I'll make it somewhat quick, but I just, I need you guys to understand what freedom looks like because I'm about to be six years sober and I don't even consider myself like a recovering alcoholic because I was delivered from alcoholism, I was delivered from addiction. And that's not everybody's story. It's not like I wasn't just like delivered from anxiety. And some people are. I still struggle with anxiety, but I was delivered from alcohol and that sort of freedom, that solid like freedom, like there is no, I'm not even, that's not a part of my identity anymore. Like that's available. And so for me, Socrates, you guys know, Socrates had been praying for me for like six Months, every single day, reading scripture, I'm praying for myself. I'm discovering who Jesus is. I'm learning a little bit about authority. I'm learning about who God is and what he died for and what freedom means and what the blood of Jesus is, that by Jesus's stripes I can be healed. And that if I give my life to Jesus and I literally take authority against all that's happening in my life, I can be set free. And so I'm praying like this. I start praying for myself every single day. But imagine the breakthrough didn't come right away. It was months and months of misery, destruction. Anyone who would have looked at me would have thought, God is far from this person.

[B]

Were you drinking at the time when you say, okay, so you're. You find Jesus, so you're learning about Jesus, but you're still in the process.

[A]

Yeah. So by that point, I had met Socrates and I was born again, right? Like, I had probably the first five minutes he met me, he probably led me to Jesus, and I grew up Catholic, but I hadn't been truly born again and dedicated my life to Jesus. So I had been born again and I had been. But again, this is sometimes people's story is like, some people have a. This day, I gave him everything and everything changed. That's not my story. It was a gradual process. Process. I was in way too deep in the darkness. You know what I mean? It took some time for me. And so all this, all these months of praying, Socrates, praying, me, praying, imagine how God was like with me every moment, backing me, showing me, like, the light is coming. You will be free. I had no awareness of this, but God was. He was with me in the darkest moments of my life. He was right there.

[B]

Yes, he was.

[A]

He was right there. And it was Jesus who put me in contact with Socrates. It was Jesus who had Socrates lead me to the Lord. It was Jesus who orchestrated all. It was Jesus who got me out of that house and brought me to this house. And honestly, these are bad decisions, but works all things together for good. Romans 8, 28. This is what he does. He even takes our biggest mistakes and says, I'm going to use this. And so I. Thanksgiving 2019. I go to Thanksgiving dinner with my ex and his family, who doesn't drink. And I bring the party in my backpack with me, my little bag. I brought alcohol with me because I knew there wouldn't be alcohol. And at this point, my ex had started to have conversations with me and being like, what is going on? This is not good. You need to stop drinking. And at that point, I was trying, I was trying to do just wine and beer, like, no hard liquor. I was having a two drink minimum, maximum, whatever. I was bound, I was in bondage. You have to just say, completely cut it off. Like, you can't even give the devil this much room because he will keep you stuck and bound. And it's a lie to think like, oh, I could just do it sometimes or have a little stop, stop. You have to go a hundred percent the opposite way. You can't even give yourself this much allowance because you'll just keep going.

[B]

I know, I know.

[A]

And so Thanksgiving 2019. My ex catches me drinking at his family's house that night. He gives me an ultimatum. I write about it in the devotional. He gives me an ultimatum and says, I want nothing to do with you if you're going to keep drinking because I can't watch you do this to yourself. And at that point, you guys, I would go through withdrawals if I didn't drink for 30 minutes. Literally. I could not go that long without drinking or I'd start to shake. I was completely addicted. And anybody watching who smokes weed or smokes cigarettes or vapes, like, you probably know what withdrawal feels like. Your body actually can't go on anymore without that thing. And that is so anti gospel. Like, the only thing that we're supposed to need and depend on is depend on is Jesus. And so anyways, that moment, that night, night I received supernatural deliverance from alcoholism. And it wasn't a big moment. It wasn't. I, like, I, I said, jesus, I'm giving you everything and I'm done. I have spent hours and hours with Jesus asking him, what was that moment? Where were you? What does that look like?

[B]

Where was this when this happened?

[A]

I didn't get a picture of it. I was at my ex's house. He had six cats and that pizza picture had six cats. And he. I was sitting on a step. I was sitting on a step that like, leads into his room. And he was standing up and he was looking like, basically above me and being like, I'm done. Like, I want nothing to do with you. You've lied to me. You've hid this from me. You said you were done and you brought it in your bag. And now you've disrespected me and all this stuff. And it was exactly what I needed. I'm looking up at him and I, I'm. All I'm thinking is, I am a piece of garbage. Like, I Hate myself. Like literally as much self hatred as you can have is what I had for myself. I absolutely hated myself. I hated what I was doing. And I've sat with Jesus and asked him, where were you in that moment? Like how did I in that moment not even make a decision? But something happened where I was so defeated that I never drank again after that day. After that day, that moment, I. And I've sat with the Lord so many times. And I feel like what I sense from Jesus is that those months of prayer are what led to breakthrough. Those months of taking authority, of relentless prayer, of having people back me in prayer. Jesus stepped into my store story and literally my testimony is not by strength, not by might, but by my spirit, says the Lord. That was what happened because I never made the decision to stop drinking. I simply stopped that night. I'm telling it's such a weird thing because I remember that moment maybe having a thought of like, oh man, I have to stop, right? But I remember feeling so defeated and almost like I had left my body. Body. I woke up the next morning and I didn't drink.

[B]

Like you didn't crave it?

[A]

No, no, I craved it. I went through withdrawals. So my body was craving it. Definitely. So that first day I was in bed dying, I thought I was going to have a seizure. Withdrawals are the scariest thing that can happen to you. You're shaking in bed, you're sweating. I'm telling. I. I was, I think I told my ex something like, you have to get me a drink. Like you have to. I'm like pleading and beggin, I can't do this. I'm bawling my eyes, I'm like, it's one of the most horrific things you can probably see. If someone go through withdrawals, then he's like, no, no, you're going to be fine. You're going to be fine. It was literally God sent. And that guy wasn't even a believer. Like, he's like, you're going to be fine. But what's interesting is that right in the other room was a bar of alcohol. So I could have walked five steps when he was in the bathroom and got a drink. Drink. But I didn't do it. God said, no, it's the Holy Spirit inside of me empowered me to not get up and drink. Jesus stepped in and said, you can't save yourself. You're done. I'm saving you. And then I always tell people, like, I think I had to go to work a couple days later. I think I didn't leave the house for a couple of days. I just stayed in bed and had the shakes and was miserable and thought I was gonna die. Completely disassociated. I'm driving to work. I worked at Joey Woodland Hills, a restaurant. I was a server, and I was driving to work, and there was this liquor store to my left that I had a tab at because I didn't have any money, because I wasn't working at that time. So I didn't even have any money. So I would literally. I had a tab at the liquor store. That's like, how bad this was. Was. I'm driving by, and it was like a instinctive reflex to turn into the liquor store every time I passed it, even if I had alcohol. Like, I would just, like, not even think about it. I turn in. I remember so distinctly driving by the liquor store. It's right here. I'm watching it as it's going by. And then I just keep driving. And I think, like, I look back then, I didn't know what was going on. But now that I look back, back, the Holy Spirit was inside of me, moving my hands and my feet, getting me to where I needed to go. Literally, like, not letting me. Like, I was no longer in control of myself.

[B]

Yeah. Yeah.

[A]

It was empowerment. This is the Holy Spirit's power at work in our life. I never made the decision to stop drinking. And then it wasn't. That was in November. It wasn't until Christmas. I didn't talk about being sober once that whole time, that whole month, because I didn't know if I was sober. I never said, I'm sober. I never said, here's my sobriety date. I'm done. It was never anything like that. I didn't talk about it because I was confused. I didn't know what was going on. And then during Christmas, I remember telling my mom, hey, Mom, I think I'm sober. And my mom didn't know how bad it was, so she was like, okay, awesome. And then it wasn't until maybe literally a year later that I started to talk to people and say, hey, I'm sober. I didn't even know that I was getting sober while I was getting sober. It's so insane. It's so wild. And I say all that to say, you guys, that I. Jesus, pulled me out of a really scary place. Place. And in my position, you do not get better without rehab or without AA or without a program or something. Like, you don't just get better. And my journey with anxiety after that took a Long time to heal. But I had Socrates who prayed with me very often. He was my connection to Jesus, because I didn't really know Jesus for myself yet, but I had somebody. And if you just have one person, do not neglect having even one person that will be there for you, that prays for you, because their prayers will carry you until you're strong enough. So I say all of this to say that I can't believe I'm standing here today, almost six years sober, never craved it one time in six years. That first week of going withdrawals is through. Withdrawals is a little bit different. But, like, I don't even consider myself a recovering alcoholic, because I'm not recovering. I've. I've been recovered that day. I recover by Jesus, by the spirit of God, supernaturally. This is the Jesus that we talk about here. This is. These are the types of things he does. So if anybody's sitting here thinking that whatever has bound you, the alcohol, the cigarettes, the addiction, whatever you think has all this hold on you, because Ari and I both know in different ways what it's like to be so bound by something that even as a follower of Jesus, you think this is the one thing Jesus does not have authority over. Over. There's no way that Jesus is stronger than this. And we're here to tell you that we've both been through a lot of stuff. I went through something that I stand here and I'm like, I don't know how I made it through. But Jesus was stronger than the alcohol. Jesus was stronger than the addiction. Jesus is, and forever will be stronger than whatever is in your life. He's already put it under his feet. And you have the authority. You have the right, right to put everything under the authority of Jesus, to bring everything under submission, to bring your body under submission. If you're addicted right now to anything, any substance, you have the ability to speak to your body and say, I put you under the submission and the authority of Jesus Christ. And I say, be free in Jesus name from whatever it is, alcohol, all the things you have authority, and it will not have a hold over you anymore after today.

[B]

I, first of all, just. I just. I just love you. I love you so much. I love being your best friend, and I love you saying the story is like the first time every time. And I just thank you because this isn't easy at all to share these vulnerable parts about your life being in a dark home. And I know how hard that was to talk about that from the beginning. And you don't Know how many people you help? Like, you don't know how many people you free. You don't know how many people look at you and say, look at this girl. Like, I'm not alone. I can get through it, too. I'm not unworthy. I'm not too far gone. So many people that are drinking that come up in this thing that, like, I know because I'm from Massachusetts, like, this is what we do. Like, so many people feel like I'll never be able to come out of this. Like, I grew up in this. And they hear you and they see you sitting here today, glowing, beautiful, on the other side of it, and you don't know what you're doing for those people. And I've even talked to a girl recently, last week in Massachusetts, and you were half of the reason why she has a woman's center that she helps recovering alcoholics. And she's been sober for four years.

[A]

Let's go.

[B]

Because she found Jesus through your story.

[A]

Oh, Jesus.

[B]

So I just. I know it's like you. You can't even see it, but you don't know what you're doing. But by being open and vulnerable and loving on these people that are battling it. So I'm just so proud of you. I really am.

[A]

Thank you so much.

[B]

I really am. I wanted to ask you, I. And maybe you, like, maybe you didn't struggle, but what did after. Okay, so you were delivered, and what did that next season of your life look like? Like, can you walk us through how your life looked? Because I know that you were partying, you were in la. How did your life change? What did your day to day to life look like? Because even when we're delivered, we still have to do a complete life change. So tell us what your life looked like moving forward after the alcoholism.

[A]

100%. I mean, I lost all of my friends during that time, because my friends during that time, I mean, and I was like, doing nightlife. I worked. I was, you know, doing bottle service. So I first of all, quit the bottle service job. Thank you also to my ex for saying, you're never doing. You're not going there because it just breeds alcohol. You're not going to stay sober in an environment like that. So I think what's so important for everyone to hear is that your friends in your environment are literally, literally everything. My ex during that time, he also got sober with me because he was like, you can't do this by yourself, and you certainly can't do this if I'm also drinking. So he got sober and I went into intense isolation. And that's not what God would have for people. God would have us be in Christian community. I didn't have that and I didn't even know what that freaking was. I had never even been to a Christian non denominational church church. I was still like, you know, I, I, I had no idea about any of that stuff. But for me, I went through isolation. I was with nobody except my ex at the time and maybe one or two friends. I wasn't around alcohol for at least the first six months of being sober. Nobody drank around me. And then after that I was able to be around people. But it was intense isolation and I went through deep healing and Socrates walked me through, through so many things. We had so many honestly, and I'm not ashamed to say this because I'm not ashamed to be charismatic Deliverance sessions. There was a lot of prayer that had to go through. I had accumulated a lot of darkness and a lot of stuff that was not good. And so I had to, I dedicated my life to healing. And at that time I wasn't reading the Word yet, so I would advise people differently than what I did because I got a lot of anxiety journals, I got gratitude journals. But I was trying, you know, I was doing all the things for healing and I was meditating, I was trying to silence my mind. Now we know that we meditate on the Word and we fill our minds with the word of God. But anybody who's in that position has to go through intense healing and your life has to change. You cannot be in the environments that you were in before me. Getting out of that dark brick house that I was in. I was going to die in that house. House, Yeah, I would have died in that house. And I needed to be away from all of that. And God, in the middle of my absolute destruction, somehow led me to a place that was the opposite of that. And that was the most important part. Getting out of the environment. And I know guys, Ari and I are like loyal people who are like, you never leave anybody. You never like, I'm sorry, but I'm going to be the one to say it. You can lovingly, like Tony said, said last week, like, you can say like, I love you so much, but like, this doesn't work for. You have to get out of situations that aren't good for you. You have to get away from people who are influencing you to do things that you shouldn't be doing. It's life or death. Like it's, you will do what the people around you are doing, you know all right guys, morning set the tone for my entire day. I wanted coffee that I would look forward to, but that also makes me feel steady and honestly, coffee comes jitters in an afternoon crash. I wanted to keep the ritual of having coffee in the morning, just not the side effects. So I'm so excited to talk to you guys about everyday dose aka coffee with benefits. It's 100% Arabica coffee plus functional support, Lion's mane and chaga, collagen protein and nootropics to fuel, focus and give clean sustained energy. No crash, no jitters. It takes about 30 seconds to make and actually tastes like the coffee you love. And I love that you get two types of roast to choose from depending on what you prefer. 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[B]

So I, I mean, so I grew up around it my whole life, and it goes back to generations in my family of alcoholics. And that's another thing that can have, plays a big part in being an alcoholic, is it goes back in your family line. And so I just saw so, so much darkness and alcoholism. I just looked at my family and I was like, I just. And like where I come from and how I grew up, even in high school, I mean, half of my high school died because of alcohol and drugs. There's so many scriptures right, like that we can even read. I mean, people drank wine in the Bible, but you have to be careful. In Proverbs 23, verse 29, it says, who has anguish, who has sorrow, who is always fighting, who is always complaining, who has unnecessary bruises, who has bloodshot eyes. It is the one who spends long hours in the taverns trying out new drinks. Don't gaze at the wine, seeing how red it is, how it sparkles in the cup, how it smoothly it goes down. For in the end it bites like a poisonous snake, it stings like a viper. In First Corinthians, verse 6, it says, you say I'm allowed to do anything, but not everything is good for you. And even though I'm allowed to do anything, I must not become a slave to anything. I've just, I don't know, I grew up and I've seen how much it destroys. You know, you can get sober and then you fall and then you go back. And I've seen it my whole life with friends and family and, and, and drug addiction and alcoholism and it, I mean, it's one of the worst diseases you can ever go through. It's not as simple as it seems for most people. And so, yeah, and I just, the whole, like the whole time we talk about alcoholism, I just think of how many people fall back into alcoholism and they're like, I'm too far gone. It's such a journey with substances. It really is. My dad's best friend owns a sober house. House. And that's the Girl I was telling you about. And this girl that was in the sober house, my dad's best friend, started talking about girls gone Bible. And she's like, wait, Angen R. She's like, I found Jesus. Through their podcast, she started talking about you, how she saw how you were sober, and she's like, I've been sober for. I think it's been three years. And now she literally runs sober houses for mothers, single mothers that were alcoholics, that struggle.

[A]

Wow.

[B]

And I just want to talk about. I was so blessed to have met her and hear her story, because she. It's something that she grew up. She had been drinking since she was seven years old.

[A]

Wow.

[B]

And I feel like this could help so many people because most people do need aa. Most people do need to go to rehab. And you know what, guys? That's okay.

[A]

That's so okay.

[B]

Yeah. Because it's. I mean, rehab saved my dad. Aa, like, truly saved my dad. It gave him community. It showed him the Bible. But I just wanted to read to you because so many people in Massachusetts just struggle with this. This is like. There's something about the Northeast that you just grow up in this environment of alcoholism, and it's so normalized.

[A]

It's just.

[B]

It's crazy. Name is Angelica, by the way, and she said, for someone who has struggled with addiction Since I was 12 years old, I look at these definitions and all. And all I see is symptoms of what addiction is. The most important part is not even addressed in the clinical books or taught in school. For those studying addiction, what the world is doing is treating the symptoms and not getting to the root. From someone who has tried every method possible, I can tell you that the one true answer to addiction is addressing the spiritual part. Addiction at its root is so deeply, spiritually connected to the deceptions and the lies that we believe about ourselves, about this life, and about God. From someone like me, I was born into addiction and alcoholism. It was a part of my life from a very young age. It was part of how we lived, how we cooked. And honestly, it was a solution for my spiritual brokenness. For many years, I never wanted to live. I was always suicidal. And the very first time I took a substance, I finally felt like everything was going to be okay.

[A]

Exactly.

[B]

Yep. Drugs and alcohol took away that feeling of unworthiness, that feeling of never being good enough or pretty enough or smart enough. It gave me the ability to be free from the mental torture I had experienced. As far as I can remember growing up, being abused emotionally, physically, and sexually, obviously played A huge part in that. But again, that is all spiritual. When you're a child and you experience physical, sexual and emotional abuse, you're being exposed to bond experience. So she goes on and says this. In the book, Big Book of Alcoholics Anonymous, it says that we can have our own conception of God. While I understand why that's written to help people take their first step toward faith, I also recognize that, that it doesn't fully align with the deeper truth. At its core, alcoholism is selfish, self centered and driven by the need to control and have things our own way. It's rooted in pride and thinking we know better. True freedom then comes only when we surrender that mindset and truly accept who God truly is. So I thought that was so interesting.

[A]

Beautiful.

[B]

It says in aa because I always thought that they teach about God. God, but they say in AA that you can have your own conception of.

[A]

God and basically they call it a higher power.

[B]

Yeah. I didn't know that. I thought it was all about God.

[A]

You thought it was Jesus?

[B]

I did. And so, yeah, I just, I thought that was interesting. If anyone's in AA right now, battling that can be tough because when you make your own God, you're fighting this battle by yourself and we can't fight the battle by ourself.

[A]

So it can only be Jesus.

[B]

Yes.

[A]

Your true freedom will never come from a higher power. While that probably does help a lot of people, that probably the idea of a higher power is a beautiful thing that definitely helps people. And they're still not truly free.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

And they still haven't found the true source of freedom. And even if somebody is able to get free on earth and stay free from alcohol, all if they don't give their life to Jesus, we know where they're going.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

And that's devastating and that's heart wrenching. And that can't be the case. And like, I'm so happy that you mentioned that. That like having a higher power does not equate to believing in Jesus. You either put your faith in Jesus or you're believing a lie.

[B]

Yeah. Yeah.

[A]

And we just want to say alcohol is not a sin. Being drunk is a sin.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Alcohol is not a sin. Sin. However, looking to anything other than Jesus for comfort is a sin. Looking to anything except Jesus for fulfillment is a sin. So having a glass of wine. Yes. Isn't necessarily sinful. But what is your heart behind it? Are you trying to have more of an identity? Are you trying to feel more comfortable? Are you trying to feel like more of a version of you? That you want to be. That is sinful. And it's just so bad for you. And it's false peace and it's not worth it. Alcohol impairs your judgment whether you're drinking or not. If it's in your life, like, it will impair your judgment for days after you even have one night of just a couple of drinks. It changes your brain chemistry. It makes you a different person. You know, imagine if you're married and. And your spouse married one version of you, but then every time you drink, they get a different version of you. That's not fair.

[B]

And I'll just say one more thing. When you are struggling with alcohol, you need to be surrounded by a body.

[A]

Yeah, yeah.

[B]

Whatever addiction, whatever it is you're struggling with, we are not designed to do this alone. No. Jesus gave us each other. Like, we need to be surrounded. I can't tell you when I am in like a fight or flight for my life because I'm struggling mentally. I need my people. This is why I talk about people, friendships so much, because this is what is going to get us out. You need to be surrounded. If you are dealing with addiction, you need to be surrounded. You need these people to hold you up and carry you through. That's why people have sponsors.

[A]

Exactly.

[B]

Sponsors are the best thing for you. Get a sponsor. Get a trusted sponsor that can walk this thing through with you.

[A]

Yeah. You need to people. You need people. Absolutely. And like Ari said, there's nothing good that comes from alcohol. In fact, there's a lot of bad that comes from alcohol. So even if you're not just addicted to alcohol and will we will even talk about that more. But we can read Genesis verse 20 or. I'm sorry, Genesis 9, 20, 27. Here we have Noah. And this is a story about how drunkenness leads to shame and destruction. And how often does happen to people where they drink for a night art. And then they're like. They wake up the next morning with all this anxiety because they don't know what they said. They don't know what they did. They acted in a way that they wouldn't have acted. And it leads to so much shame. So in the story, Noah began to be a man of the soil is after the flood, Noah plants a vineyard and he becomes drunk. He drank of the wine and became drunk. And he laid uncovered in his tent. So he laid naked in his tent. And Ham, the father of Canaan, saw the nakedness of his father and told his two brothers outside. Then Shem and Japheth took A garment, laid it on both of their shoulders and walked backward and covered their father's nakedness. When Noah woke from his wine and knew what his youngest son had done to him, he said, cursed be Canaan. A servant of servants shall he be to his brothers. So in this moment, we see. See, Noah was laid naked, and then his son dishonored him and put a curse on the land of Canaan. And I know this sounds really intense, but, like, imagine the first mention of alcohol in the Bible ever leads to a curse and not a celebration. So people who use alcohol as a celebration, the first time it's ever mentioned in scripture, it's not a celebratory thing. Um, and I just imagine, like, Noah is a good, righteous man and he ended up in complete shame because of his drunkenness. Imagine how many people go through that where they drink, and then they're like, oh, I wish I didn't do that. I didn't. I wish I didn't say that. It makes you different. I know. You know?

[B]

I know. But look at even Noah, the most faithful man fell. And that just.

[A]

That should.

[B]

That should free you right now. That even Noah, who was so obedient, so faithful and man after God fell, fell.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

And so while you're sitting there beating yourself up, feeling so far gone, feeling so much shame, be reminded of Noah so good that even fell.

[A]

Yeah. You know, it's so real. I mean, and like what Ari saying, you don't need to have shame, but the truth is that alcohol, the weed, the vape, that everything is going to lead to more shame. It will lead to more shame. And you don't have to be bound. You can be free. Jesus granted you free freedom. He gave you. The spirit is the Lord. And where the spirit of the Lord is, there is freedom. If you call on the Holy Spirit, if you accept Jesus into your life, and then you're baptized in the Holy Spirit, you can receive true, lasting freedom. And if you remember my story, remember all those months of praying, and then there was the breakthrough. Some people receive breakthrough in a second. Some people, it takes a little longer. We don't know always know why God does things the way that he does. But what I know is that he promises freedom, freedom. He promises complete freedom. And like Ari said, you might fall and then get back up. The truth is, if you've gotten sober, if you've laid something down and then you pick it back up again because you think, oh, I could just do it one time. I guarantee you it won't just be one time. You'll find yourself directly into the same cycle. Like six years later, I could think, oh, it's been so long. Why don't I just have one drink? I promise you I will be right back to where I was in that brick house. House within days.

[B]

That, that's within days. Yes.

[A]

And for you guys, because it's. That's how Satan works. He doesn't. Oh, I thought there was something on my face. No, that's how Satan works. And so if you did give in again, just do, just get sober again, just lay it down again, just submit it to Jesus once again. You can get sober again, you can lay it down again. But there can't be this back and forth, wishy washy, oh, maybe just one more, more time. It will trap you again and it will keep track, trapping you until you decide. Because it is a decision you have to make that I'm done with this for the rest of my life. Whether it's alcohol, whether it's vaping with anything that you're addicted to, you can't. That you're dependent on, that you want, that you have a craving for. That's not allowed. You can't do that. You can't live like that. It means you're in bondage. It means that your mind, body or spirit is craving something other than Jesus. And we were not meant to live it that way. That's worship. If you're craving anything other than Jesus, you're worshiping that thing and it's idolatry and it will lead you to death. You know what, I love what you said, and I think that's really important is like, you might fall. Just get back up. And that's so real. I think the tension is here. Everyone falls. Everybody sins, everybody. Yeah, I don't drink anymore, but guess what? I still sinned probably three times this morning, eight times yesterday, like with the words that I say, the thoughts that I had, like, of course. But this is like the point of maturity in your faith is it's one thing to tolerate sin and then it's one thing to fall into sin. Of course you're going to fall into sin. And then you also get to a point where you decide, no, I'm never doing this again. And you let the Holy Spirit empower you for that to happen. But that can only take place when first you've made the decision, decision to not tolerate something. And you have a clear conviction. Because a lot of people are like, one day alcohol is bad, but then the next day, ah, it's okay. And so of course they're going to be falling into sin because you don't even know what you believe. But then it's another thing to know what you believe and then be human and fall into sin. So this is where we begin, guys. We make a decision. Where do we land on this? Are we going to make a decision to never get drunk? And again, are we going to make a decision to never buy a vape again? Are we going to make the decision that alcohol is bad for me and there's nothing that it good it does in my life? Are we going to make the decision that marijuana does not do what I say it does for my life? Because it doesn't. Because it doesn't. It's not doing anything for you.

[B]

Also, you know what? Alcohol and weed and all these substance.

[A]

And studio ages you.

[B]

Ages you. If that's not. If that doesn't say I'm never touching.

[A]

That is enough for me. That is enough for me. Hey, if you're vain, here you go. Don't smoke cigarettes because it'll give you wrinkles. So for vanity purposes, there you go. And more importantly, it leads to death. No, seriously. But make the decision to and today. And let's just pray for you guys. Lord, we just lift up every single person in this who's watching this video or listening to this podcast who is at a crossroads. Jesus, who hears your voice saying, come to me. They're hearing you, Jesus, for the very first time, maybe saying, come to me. Lay all of that stuff down. You don't need it. I am better than the thing that you're holding on to. I'm better, I'm more fulfilling, I'm more comforting. And it's real and it's everlasting. So, Father, I just pray for every single person. I pray that they would encounter you so intensely right now, Jesus, that they would fall, be brought to their knees in an encounter with you. I pray this very moment, Holy Spirit, you'd fill their rooms and their hearts and their minds with your presence and that the spirit of freedom would fall upon them and that there would be supernatural breakthrough right now in Jesus name, that the addiction that is held on to them, that has its claws in their neck, the thing that they love, the thing that they're worshiping, the vice that has brought comfort. We break the stronghold in the name of Jesus and we say be free in Jesus name. Guys, I just want to invite you into a moment. If you've never given your life to Jesus, this is where your freedom starts, okay? This is where the spirit of freedom comes over you and inside of you and on you and empowers you, anoints you, and empowers you to live a life of freedom. Because we need Jesus to do it. He did it in our lives. He will do it in yours. But you have to accept him first. The God who sent his Son on the earth to get up on a cross, to die a brutal and painful death, to be beaten, bruised, marred beyond recognition, so that by his wounds, the wounds on his back, you could be healed. In this moment, he lost his life so that you could gain one. He gave up his life so that he could, right now, in this very moment, give you a brand new one. And this moment can be your moment of absolute breakthrough and turnaround. But in this moment, you not only have to accept Jesus, but you have to declare repentance, that you repent of the way you've been living your life. You repent of the addiction. You repent of the idolatry. You repent that you have had this thing in your hands and you've said it's more important than Jesus. I put it higher than Jesus. So in this moment, the best thing you can do is give your life to the one who gave it to you. Jesus loves you so much and he wants you to be free. And someone needs to hear that because you're living in sin, shame, bondage and addiction, thinking God doesn't want me to be free. But the truth is, he died so you could be free. So receive freedom and don't settle for not being free in any area of your life. Do not settle for not being free. So pray with us. Dear Jesus, I give you my life. I believe you died on the cross for the forgiveness of my sins. And now you're seated at the right hand of the Father. I believe you resurrected from the dead, ascended into heaven, and now you're seated at the right hand of the Father, reigning in glory forever. Jesus, I invite you to be Lord of my life. I repent of my sin. I renounce my sin. I renounce the world. I renounce the devil. I repent from my addiction. I repent for my substance abuse. I. I repent for my idolatry. And I repent for turning to anything except you. Lord, I turn my heart to you right now and I give you everything. And I declare that my mind, my body, and my spirit is under the submission and the authority of Jesus Christ of Nazareth. You said that you would heal us and that you would free us. So, Lord, I say I believe you at Your word. And I declare that I am healed and I'm free. In the name of Jesus Christ, Amen.

[B]

He's waiting for you. He's. He. He's already after you. Just like he was in the bathroom with Angela when the whole time he was right there. And he had her girdled under his arm. It's the same with you. All you have to do. It's so simple. It really is.

[A]

Help me.

[B]

Like, help me get into communion. Like, he will be your strength. You just have to take that first, that first step and say, I need help. I want to put this under my feet. I don't want to be addicted to this anymore. That is the first step. If you're saying that we are so, so proud of you and so isn't Jesus.

[A]

So we love you guys so much. We're so proud of you. Go be free. Go be free. May the Lord bless you and keep you. May he make his face to shine upon you and be gracious to you. May he turn his face towards you and give you peace. Shalom. Shalom. We love you so much. Morning, Zoe. Got donuts. Jeff Bridges, why are you still living above our garage? Well, I dig the mattress and I want to be in a T mobile commercial like you. Teach me. So. Dana. Oh no. I'm not really prepared.

[B]

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[A]

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[B]

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[A]

So what are we having for launch? Dude, my work here is done. The 24 month credit is on experience.

[B]

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[A]

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