The Happy Pod: Sending my mother's ashes around the world

Summary

Global News Podcast Summary: "The Happy Pod: Sending My Mother's Ashes Around the World"

Release Date: June 21, 2025
Host: BBC World Service
Episode Title: The Happy Pod: Sending my mother's ashes around the world

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1. Sending a Mother's Ashes on a Global Journey

Overview:
The episode opens with a heartfelt story of Cara Melia, who grapples with the loss of her mother, Wendy Chadwick. In an attempt to honor her mother's unfulfilled dream of traveling the world, Cara devises a unique farewell by sending Wendy's ashes in a message bottle into the sea.

Key Points:

• Personal Tribute: Cara places some of Wendy's ashes in a bottle with a note: "This is my mum. Throw her back in. She's traveling the world."
• Viral Response: The bottle is launched from Skegness, England, and soon after is found by someone nearby. Sharing this find on social media leads to the story going viral, garnering a surge of positive reactions and emotional responses from around the globe.

Notable Quotes:

• Cara Melia ([01:58]): "She was the heart of the family. Quirky, different, never wanted to fit in. She dreamed of traveling but never had the chance."
• Cara Melia ([03:18]): "It helps with the grief, knowing I fulfilled her wish to travel, even if it's in ashes."
• Cara Melia ([05:13]): "Even when things are really tough, you'll find something to be happy about. On the other side, you'll be smiling."

Insights & Impact:

• Emotional Healing: This act serves as Cara's way of coping with loss, transforming grief into a meaningful tribute.
• Inspiring Others: The viral nature of the story encourages others to find creative ways to honor their loved ones, fostering a global community of shared emotions and support.

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2. Conservation Success: Indo Chinese Tigers in Thailand

Overview:
The podcast highlights a significant conservation achievement where the population of Indo Chinese tigers in Thailand has quintupled over 15 years, rising from approximately 40 to 200 individuals.

Key Points:

• Breeding Deer for Prey Enhancement: Reintroducing deer has bolstered the prey base for tigers, aiding their recovery.
• Habitat Regeneration: Efforts to restore logged areas and create grasslands have provided tigers with the necessary environment to thrive.

Notable Quotes:

• Tara Piri ([07:11]): "Tigers have been in trouble due to poaching and habitat loss. Regenerating forests and boosting prey populations have been crucial."
• Tara Piri ([08:07]): "Reviving forest areas and supporting deer populations provide enough food source for the tigers to survive."

Insights & Impact:

• Ecosystem Balance: The increase in tiger numbers signifies a healthy shift towards restoring ecological balance in Thailand.
• Scalable Conservation Models: The successful strategies implemented for Indo Chinese tigers can be replicated for other endangered species, emphasizing the importance of comprehensive conservation efforts.

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3. Restoring Kelp Forests with Sunflower Starfish

Overview:
A breakthrough in marine conservation involves breeding the critically endangered sunflower starfish to combat the overpopulation of purple sea urchins, which are decimating California's vital kelp forests.

Key Points:

• Role of Sunflower Starfish: These starfish are natural predators of purple sea urchins, helping to maintain the health of kelp forests.
• Breeding Success: Scientists have developed methods to breed sunflower starfish in captivity, aiming to reintroduce them into the wild to restore ecosystem balance.

Notable Quotes:

• Jessica Witherly ([10:35]): "Sunflower starfish are voracious predators, essential for controlling purple urchin populations and preserving kelp forests."
• Jessica Witherly ([12:17]): "We are building captive populations to eventually release hundreds of sunflower stars back into the wild."

Insights & Impact:

• Climate Change Mitigation: Healthy kelp forests play a critical role in carbon dioxide absorption, making their restoration pivotal in tackling climate change.
• Biodiversity Enhancement: Reviving kelp ecosystems benefits a vast array of marine life, promoting greater biodiversity along the Pacific Coast.

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4. Therapeutic Gaming at Seattle Children's Hospital

Overview:
Innovative use of immersive video games at Seattle Children's Hospital is transforming the hospital experience for young patients, making it less frightening and more engaging.

Key Points:

• Emotional Support through Gaming: Video games provide a sense of achievement and hope, helping children cope with long hospital stays and treatments.
• Virtual Hospital in Minecraft: Dr. Henry O created a virtual replica of the hospital in Minecraft, allowing children to familiarize themselves with the environment in a fun and interactive way.

Notable Quotes:

• Maximilian Williams ([14:28]): "Feeling achievement in the hospital is hard, but gaming helps kids hold on to hope."
• Dr. Henry O ([15:47]): "I wanted to make something that would make the hospital more familiar and less scary for kids."

Insights & Impact:

• Peer Connections: Virtual environments enable children to interact and form friendships, reducing feelings of isolation.
• Enhanced Patient Experience: These initiatives not only improve the mental well-being of young patients but also foster a supportive community within the hospital.

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5. Empowering Women in Pakistan with the H2O Wheel

Overview:
Nerda Sheikh introduces the H2O Wheel, a device designed to alleviate the arduous task of water collection for women and girls in rural Pakistan, significantly impacting their lives.

Key Points:

• Innovative Design: The H2O Wheel is a water roller that can carry the equivalent of eight clay pots, reducing the physical burden on women who traditionally bear the responsibility of water collection.
• Holistic Benefits: The device not only saves time and improves physical health but also enhances mental well-being and economic prospects.

Notable Quotes:

• Nerda Sheikh ([19:33]): "The H2O Wheel transformed lives, saving time and improving both physical and mental health."
• Nerda Sheikh ([21:21]): "Women have free time, are improving their lives economically and socially, and feel empowered."

Insights & Impact:

• Social Empowerment: By reducing the labor-intensive process of fetching water, women gain more opportunities for education and economic activities.
• Community Health: Access to safe drinking water via solar-powered facilities further enhances the overall health and quality of life in these communities.

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6. Black Dads Unplugged: Nappy Braai in South Africa

Overview:
Azola Mozukandabo discusses the growing tradition of "nappy braai" in South Africa, a celebration for expectant fathers that fosters a supportive community among men navigating fatherhood.

Key Points:

• Cultural Shift: Nappy braais serve as the male equivalent of a baby shower, emphasizing camaraderie and support among fathers.
• Breaking Stereotypes: The event challenges traditional notions of masculinity by creating a space for men to share experiences and advice openly.

Notable Quotes:

• Azola Mozukandabo ([22:53]): "Black Dads Unplugged inspires a new narrative where black fathers support each other through fatherhood."
• Azola Mozukandabo ([24:13]): "I want to affirm my children that they are unconditionally loved and support a positive fatherhood experience."

Insights & Impact:

• Positive Parenting Models: Initiatives like Black Dads Unplugged promote healthy, engaged fatherhood, countering negative stereotypes and fostering stronger family bonds.
• Community Building: These gatherings create networks of support, reducing feelings of isolation among new fathers and encouraging shared responsibility in parenting.

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7. Listener Interaction and Heartwarming Closure

Overview:
The episode concludes with a playful exchange regarding the podcast's editor, Karen Martin, highlighting the community's sense of camaraderie and concern for its members.

Notable Quotes:

• Ed Porter ([26:21]): "Karen Martin does not appear to have had a day off for several years. I am making a welfare inquiry."
• Karen Martin ([26:50]): "I'm lucky to lead an amazing team. Yes, I have the odd day off. Thanks, Ed."

Insights & Impact:

• Community Engagement: Encouraging listener interaction fosters a loyal and engaged audience, making the podcast feel like a supportive community.
• Human Touch: Sharing behind-the-scenes moments adds a personal dimension, strengthening the connection between hosts and listeners.

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Conclusion

This episode of The Happy Pod weaves together stories of personal loss transformed into global acts of love, significant environmental conservation successes, innovative approaches to healthcare, empowering technological solutions for women in rural Pakistan, and cultural shifts promoting supportive fatherhood in South Africa. Through these narratives, the podcast highlights the resilience of the human spirit and the positive changes that can emerge from adversity. Notable quotes from participants enrich the storytelling, providing authentic insights and emotional depth. Overall, the episode serves as a beacon of hope and inspiration, showcasing how creative and compassionate actions can lead to meaningful global impact.

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Contact & Subscription Information:
Listeners are encouraged to share their own uplifting stories by emailing [e-mail]. The Global News Podcast is available twice daily on weekdays and daily on weekends, with special bonus episodes reacting to urgent breaking stories. Additionally, The Happy Pod airs every Saturday, focusing on global good news.

Transcript

[Nick Miles]

This BBC podcast is supported by ads outside the uk.

[Expedia Ad]

Packages by Expedia. You were made to be rechargeable. We were made to package flights, hotels and hammocks for less.

[Cara Melia]

Expedia.

[Expedia Ad]

Made to travel.

[Nick Miles]

This is the Happy Pod from the BBC World Service. I'm Nick Miles and in this edition, an unusual version of a message in a bottle.

[Cara Melia]

Even when things are really tough, then you know that you're going to find something to be happy about in it. When you get to the other side of it, you are going to be smiling at some point.

[Nick Miles]

Why one woman decided to send her mom's ashes on a journey around the world. How breeding deer helped a remarkable recovery for endangered tigers in Thailand. Ants.

[Maximilian Williams]

My favorite part about the hospital model is that they can go to their room and jump on the bed, right? Gain a little more agency back.

[Nick Miles]

How computer games can help make hospitals more fun for children. We start with a story about trying to find happiness whilst grieving for a loved one. Cara Melia's mother, Wendy Chadwick, passed away at the age of 51 from an undiagnosed heart condition. Determined to keep her dream of traveling the world alive, Kara put some of Wendy's ashes in a bottle and launched it out to sea with a note that says, this is my mum. Throw her back in. She's traveling the world. The bottle entered the water in the English seaside town of Skegness, and when someone posted on social media that they'd found it on a nearby beach, the story went viral. Kara spoke to the happy pods, Holly Gibbs, and started by telling her what Wendy was like.

[Cara Melia]

She was amazing. She was just like the heart of the family. She was quirky, she was different. She never wanted to fit in. She never got the chance to really travel since she was a kid because obviously she had five kids of her own to look after. A mum, a brother, so she never got the chance. But, like, she was talking at, like, the start of, like, the year and the end of last year that she wanted to start traveling again. Anywhere that had a really nice beach and really good sun. So that's originally where the idea has come from.

[Scott Miles]

And what has the response been? Like? It's gone viral on social media, so.

[Cara Melia]

It'S been, like, really positive. From what I've seen, mostly everyone's absolutely loved the idea. They want to do it themselves. From what I've read, it's made people cry. It's just I weren't expecting any of it and I weren't, like, I weren't expecting it to go viral. Either.

[Scott Miles]

How does it feel to you when you have someone say to you that their story has made them cry?

[Cara Melia]

I'm like, well, I wasn't expecting that. But I'm happy that it has touched people the way it has and I'm happy it has traveled as far as it has.

[Scott Miles]

Would you inspire other people who are struggling with grief and the loss of a loved one to do something similar to this to keep their legacy going?

[Cara Melia]

Yeah, I think it helps a lot, just like, with the whole grief part, just to know that, like, I did get to fulfill what she wanted to do. Obviously it worked in the way that.

[Scott Miles]

We wanted, but where do you hope the bottle will wash up next?

[Cara Melia]

Possibly, like, Barbados or even Spain. Just somewhere that's really, like, nice and sunny, far off, anywhere over the beach.

[Scott Miles]

What should people do if they find your mum in a bottle washed up on a beach?

[Cara Melia]

Well, I've had so many different comments about it of, like, people putting some paper in it or writing on the back of the note. But if they do find them, throw back in if you want to share it on Facebook or anything, like, tag the place that you found them and then hopefully it gets back to me so I can see.

[Scott Miles]

Talk to me about the day that you put the message in the bottle in the sea for the first time.

[Cara Melia]

I felt really sad, actually, but it's something that I wanted to do. It was just like, saying bye to her in my own little way. So it was a good experience. It was especially for, like, my grief. It's made me happy to know that, you know, she's out there. Like, she may not be in body form, but she is still out there. She is traveling. I don't have a clue where she is now, but she is traveling somewhere. Like, I think it made me feel a bit better knowing that she weren't just sat in a box.

[Scott Miles]

What legacy do you hope she will leave by traveling around the world in a bottle?

[Cara Melia]

I hope it'll like, inspire people, like just anyone who's lost someone, that there is a way to kind of make it like a happy thing. Hopefully inspires other people to do something of the sort, just to manage their own emotions throughout it.

[Scott Miles]

What do you think your mum would say in response to all of this media attention and also to traveling the world in a bottle?

[Cara Melia]

Oh, she'd be. One, she'd be calling me crazy because why? Why not? Two, she'd be absolutely laughing because she wasn't one to ever, like, want the attention or anything, so for it to all just come so suddenly. But she also knows that this is like the type of person I am. I will make a good thing out of a bad situation. Hopefully she'd be laughing and seeing a good side to it. Like, I would have drowned in the grief if I couldn't find something to try and make it happy. Because even when things are really tough, then you know that you're gonna find something to be happy about in it. Even though it's obviously it's a horrible situation, but you know when you get to the other side of it, you are going to be smiling at some point.

[Nick Miles]

Cara Melia and if you found an unusual way to celebrate the life of a loved one that you think could help others, we would love to hear from you. Just send us an email or a voice. Note to global podcast at BBC. Code now to some good news for one of the world's endangered big cats. Figures released this week show there are now five times more Indo Chinese tigers in Thailand than there were 15 years ago, from about 40 to around 200. It follows a joint project between the government and the conservation group wwf, which included breeding deer for them to hunt. Indochinese tigers, which are smaller than many other species with darker fur and narrower stripes, are only found in Thailand and Myanmar. Now, Tara Piri is a lecturer in ecology and conservation at the University of Surrey here in the uk.

[Tara Piri]

Tigers have been in trouble for a very long time, unfortunately, because you know that they are this majestic creature, they've got this beautiful coat and unfortunately there's a lot of mythical properties surrounding it as well. And unfortunately, it's really come under poaching a lot.

[Cara Melia]

Lot.

[Tara Piri]

But also the loss of habitat has really impacted the tiger because they do need a large space, they need a lot of prey. They're kind of getting hit from both sides and so they have plummeted in numbers. So now we're looking at about four and a half thousand tigers worldwide. They are in a fragment of what they used to roam across.

[Nick Miles]

Now, this population of tigers, the Indo Chinese tiger in Thailand in particular, seems to have been boosted by the reintroduction of deer in that particular area to boost the numbers of prey.

[Tara Piri]

Absolutely. So it's not just the boosting of prey. There's been a lot of logging in the area and again, a lot of poaching. And it's not just of the tigers, it's of the food source as well. So by regenerating those areas that have been logged and actually adding in grasslands, which is really what the deer need, and then being able to improve the deer populations, there's enough food source there for the tigers to survive. So we're seeing this amazing increase in numbers. That's absolutely brilliant. And it just shows, you know, having a really good strategy for regenerating the forest really does reap the rewards and hopefully we can keep going with that.

[Nick Miles]

I mean, that is a huge effort, a massive increase in the population of this particular tiger there. Is it something that's being replicated for other tiger species?

[Tara Piri]

Yes, I believe so. You know, again, looking at the numbers, it's really encouraging to see, but, you know, it needs to happen on a big scale, scale and it can't happen without money. So that's why I think, you know, having WWF behind the governments and providing funds from the general public, I mean, this is, this is the big thing. You know, people across the globe have actually been able to get involved in this. So just by donating money, it provides the funds that are sorely needed to help locals get involved. And locals need to be involved because at the end of the day, if they're not involved that, you know, they don't know to conserve these animals, you know, they, they will still go on and poach and log and that sort. So, you know, getting them involved, making sure that they have what they need to help protect these species, is absolutely vital. So it can be rolled out and it has been seen in other species. And I think, you know, we need a few wins. We need to hear about these wins. So this is why it's so important.

[Nick Miles]

Tara Perry and staying with good news for endangered animals, scientists have made a breakthrough that could help restore part of the Pacific Ocean and tackle climate change. The kelp forests off the coast of California provide food and shelter for a vast array of marine life, as well as absorbing carbon dioxide, the main gas that causes global warming. Well, in recent years, they've been devastated by a surge in purple sea urchins. But now researchers have found a way to breed a critically endangered starfish that can restore balance to this vital ecosystem. Harry Bligh reports.

[Jessica Witherly]

It's easy to see where the name sunflower star comes from. These animals have 24 arms like petals and measure up to a meter wide from tip to tip. While some are a soft yellow or orange in color, like the flower, they can also be purple or brown. These creatures once thrived along the Pacific coast of North America, but in the past decade, the population has decreased by 90%. Jessica Witherly is a senior biologist at the California Academy of Sciences.

[Scott Miles]

The sunflower starfish is actually incredibly important. They were recently Listed as critically endangered along the California coast by the ICUN list. That means that there's barely any that you would find in the California coast where you used to find them all over the place.

[Jessica Witherly]

Sunflower starfish are also voracious predators, feasting on crabs, sea cucumbers, urchins, and even other sea stars. That might not sound like good news, but it's actually part of what makes them crucial to the local ecosystem.

[Scott Miles]

California has beautiful kelp forest that is habitat to thousands of different animals. And that habitat is being destroyed right now by over population of purple urchins. Those purple urchins normally would get eaten by Pycnopodia or sunflower starfish. But because of their decline after sea star wasting disease multiple years ago, the purple urchin's population has mass produced and is decimating our kelp forest, which is destroying habitat for many different species and affecting animals all up and down the California coast.

[Jessica Witherly]

But now Jessica and her team have learned how to breed them and are building up captive populations.

[Scott Miles]

We have a ton of larvae, so we are growing these up. From free floating larvae to tiny subtle starfish to two much larger juvenile starfish.

[Jessica Witherly]

The laboratory is aiming to cooperate with other aquariums across California to raise and eventually release hundreds of sunflower stars back into the wild. Already, three other aquariums in the state are now caring for these creatures.

[Scott Miles]

The goal here is to get good and kind of break the code about how to mass produce and breed and care for these animals in our care so that then we can reintroduce them back into the wild to see surges of their numbers along the west coast.

[Jessica Witherly]

It's hoped that by reviving the population of sunflower sea stars, the tide could turn on reinvigorating California's kelp forests and biodiversity. This year, four of the starfish were spotted off the northern California coast, which scientists say is a hopeful sign of natural return.

[Nick Miles]

Harry Bly Coming up in this podcast.

[Nerda Sheikh]

I see these women. They have free time and they are improving their lives economically, socially. They feel empowered.

[Nick Miles]

How an invention that makes it easier to carry water is transforming lives in Pakistan. Now, being in hospital can be frightening and lonely at any age, and especially so for children. But in the United States, immersive video games are helping young patients come to terms with illness and long stays. The project at Seattle Children's Hospital is entirely funded by donors, including the charity Child's Play and some computer games companies. Scott Miles went to meet some of those involved.

[Maximilian Williams]

My name is Maximilian Williams and I am one of the therapeutic gaming Specialists here at Seattle Children's Hospital.

[Azola Mozukandabo]

The idea is simple. Use what children already love to help them cope with being in hospital. Max explains one way this works.

[Maximilian Williams]

It's very hard to feel achievement in the hospital because a lot of these treatments, you know, you're doing better, Everybody's telling you you're doing better, but you're feeling worse and feeling more side effects. And so feeling that journey is very difficult. But you know, if you were able to get from level 4 to level 7 and then tomorrow you get from level 7 to level 10, it's just that little tiny engine of, you know, achievement and helps you hold on to hope in medical settings.

[Azola Mozukandabo]

14 year old Aiden, who has spent most of his life in hospital, knows this firsthand. Aiden is using a ventilator while I speak to him.

[Cara Melia]

I like the video games here because procedures, surgeries, they get really stressful for me. So it just really helps me out.

[Azola Mozukandabo]

For Aidan's mom, Elsa, the gaming program has been a lifeline.

[Scott Miles]

I think it's absolutely amazing. It has definitely helped Aidan through some really hard times. It's a great distraction, personally, even for myself.

[Azola Mozukandabo]

And there's one ambitious part of this gaming program which was started by one of the hospital's senior surgeons. In his spare time, Dr. Henry O spent hundreds of hours building a complete virtual replica of the entire hospital inside the video game Minecraft.

[Nick Miles]

I wanted to make something that would make the hospital more familiar to kids and make it less scary. So I figured, okay, you know, if they can actually go to where they are in the hospital and see it, or before they come to the hospital, ideally say, okay, I'm having surgery, where is that going to be? What is that going to look like?

[Azola Mozukandabo]

For those unfamiliar, Minecraft is a video game where players build structures and worlds using virtual blocks. A bit like digital Lego. Multiple players can connect and interact together. Dr. O and I are joined by Max as the surgeon gives me a tour of the virtual hospital. Dr. O built everything from the patient's room to the operating theaters. To help children explore the virtual hospital. Dr. O has added a few playful touches he hopes will turn the Minecraft world into something familiar and fun to navigate.

[Nick Miles]

I like, put like little animals and have a scavenger hunt that is like, oh, find Kelly the cow who is in this so that kids can navigate the hospital and learn the hospital.

[Azola Mozukandabo]

If this is the first impression that most, maybe many patients have, then they have a positive association when they get here.

[Nick Miles]

So yeah, that's what I hope.

[Azola Mozukandabo]

And importantly, other patients can appear in the Virtual world alongside each other. So children who can't leave their rooms can still meet other kids and even become friends.

[Maximilian Williams]

There you go. That's a patient in their room right now having fun in the server. My favorite part about the hospital model is that they can go to their room and jump on the bed, right? Gain a little more agency back, which.

[Azola Mozukandabo]

They'Re not allowed to do otherwise.

[Maximilian Williams]

But you are allowed to do that in the Minecraft servers.

[Azola Mozukandabo]

Those kids who are able to move around the hospital get together once a month on game night. Max takes them downstairs. All around the airy space are carts and tables with video games, board games and art supplies. It's a great way for patients and staff alike to connect.

[Maximilian Williams]

It's a great opportunity for peer to peer connections. So patients that are on disparate units tend not to have the opportunity to meet. And we've created lasting friendships and also like knock down barriers with new staff groups. You know, a staff member who may be just passing by and they see two of their patients and then like, oh, you know, I love Mario Kart. And I'm like, what? You love Mario Kart? And so now then those, those daily visits are so much easier, right?

[Nick Miles]

That was Max Williams ending the report by Scott Miles. And you can hear more ideas on making hospital life easier for children, on people fixing the world, wherever you get your BBC podcasts. In Pakistan, 22 million people lack access to clean water. And in rural areas, women and girls often have to trek for hours to collect and carry what their families need every day. But one young woman has invented a device which makes the process quicker, easier and safer, called the H2O wheel. And Nerda Sheikh's organisation, Tayuba, has also installed equipment that dramatically improves the water quality. Ned has been speaking to our reporter Jacob Evans, and began by telling him more about the challenges people face in rural areas.

[Nerda Sheikh]

They carry these multiple clay pots on their heads, like 50 kgs of weight every day. And when they reach these water sources, they don't even know if the water is safe to drain. And sometimes the sources are wells which are 400ft deep. And it's like a tug of war. We call it a tug of war of four to five women just to get water out. That takes about 10 minutes just to get a pint of water. Men do not contribute to the water collection responsibilities. It's only on the shoulders, literally physically and mentally on the women, because it's considered to be a woman only chore.

[Expedia Ad]

So talk to what you've made and how it works.

[Nerda Sheikh]

We developed this simple tech enabled solution called the H2O wheel, that's how we started with that aimed to reduce the physical burden of these women who collected water on a daily basis. It's a water roller that carries water equivalent to eight clay pots. Aimed to solve the transportation problem. But what it did was it transformed their lives holistically. As they say, Jacob, water is life. And it saved them so much time that not only did it improve their physical health, like all the back issues, chronic joint issues that they were facing, it also contributed positively to their mental health. Income prospects increased by 100%. Children who accompanied their mothers on these arduous journeys could now go back to schools. So this was a ripple effect just created through the provision of safe water. And guess what, it's very rare. Men started to contribute to the water collection duties because the H2O wheel, as opposed to a clay pot, was not considered a woman only thing.

[Nick Miles]

And you've also improved the quality of.

[Nerda Sheikh]

The water through those rollers. They were still collecting water from unsafe water sources. So then we decided to solve the water source problem as well. And we installed solar powered water facilities that are generating safe drinking waters in these off grid communities in these rural areas. And now we've also launched this new revolutionary device called an H2O, a device that produces safe drinking water produced from the humidity that's found in the air. So in less than three years, we've provided over half a billion liters of safe water.

[Nick Miles]

What's the impact been of this?

[Cara Melia]

If you've seen women and girls, what.

[Nick Miles]

Do they think about it? How's it been for them?

[Nerda Sheikh]

I see these women, they have free time and they are improving their lives economically, socially, they feel empowered, they just needed a push and they are truly very happy. And we've scaled this up across Pakistan. We went in very slow, we wanted to test it, we wanted to learn. So I think in less than three years we have reached almost 1 million people. Because of the ripple impact, you've received.

[Nick Miles]

Global recognition for this work. Now how does that make you feel?

[Nerda Sheikh]

Again, it's incredible, it's reassuring. It does alleviate those feelings of isolation, frustration and sometimes anger that you feel because you do feel the burden, you know that the solutions exist. And so these kind of recognitions are definitely important to get more people to mobilize, you know, root for you, support you. And because of the support, so many doors have been opened which would have been closed to me.

[Nick Miles]

Ned, a shake now. Time for a celebration you might not have heard of that's becoming increasingly Popular amongst men in South Africa, it's called a nappy braai and is seen as the male equivalent of a baby shower, usually involving a big braai, the South African version of a barbecue, and gifts of nappies. To prepare the father to be for his new chapter as a parent moment, Azola Mozukandabo founded Black Dads Unplugged, a network of men supporting each other through fatherhood. He told my colleague Namolanta Combo about his own nappy braai and why this celebration represents a new kind of parenting.

[Expedia Ad]

I walked into what I thought was a chilled Saturday braai. It was just a bunch of guys, not a lot of us under 10. When I arrived, everyone burst out laughing and handed me a massive adult sized nappy. Before I could protest, the adult sized diaper was strapped onto me like it was like some sort of sacred rite. My friends brought quite a number of dappies, but like, for me, the gift of their time, the gift of their care, to know that they're thinking that my daughter is coming is the greatest gift. Like, to be in solidarity as brothers.

[Cara Melia]

How did you feel about the advice you received at your nappy braai?

[Expedia Ad]

The thing is, with men, the advice usually comes with humor, and sometimes you need to read between the lines. But they were like, the first step is just being there, you know, Which I think for me is very important because my first recollection, first memory of my father was seven years old, you know, so for me, the advice was just be there, you know, you'll figure it out as you go.

[Cara Melia]

And you talked about your own dad. How has becoming a parent after you had your first child, your son, how did that make you feel about your childhood?

[Expedia Ad]

I want to parent differently. I'm 35 right now. My father has never asked me how I am, you know, And I love my father. I feel like I was brought up in a house filled with love, primarily my mom being the conduit of that love. All I ever wanted was to be seen by my father. And so I want to affirm my children, you know, I want them to know that they are unconditionally loved. Apartheid, for people who don't know, was essentially institutionalizing racial segregation. Segregation and discrimination. You know, there's an element of taking out manhood and masculinity from the black man, which I think informed how the dads also showed up in their families. I came up with a project called Black Dads Unplugged, which is here to inspire a new narrative. It's a space where black fathers from all walks of life come together to share, to reflect and support one another. I think we are living in a time where only the negative is being spoken about. And I know a lot of young fathers who are showing up so beautifully, so honestly and willing to learn and willing to grow. And that's the story that I want to tell.

[Nick Miles]

You can hear more from Azola and many other interviews about parenthood, relationships and families on Dear Daughter, wherever you get your BBC podcasts. One last thing before we go. We've had a voice note from one of our listeners at the end of every episode of the Happy Board and our Global News podcast, which goes out twice a day on weekdays, you'll hear this.

[Tara Piri]

The editor is Karen Martin.

[Scott Miles]

The editor is Karen Martin.

[Nick Miles]

Our editor's Karen Martin.

[Jessica Witherly]

The editor is Karen Martin.

[Nick Miles]

The editor is Karen Martin. The editor is Karen Martin. And Ed got in touch with some concerns.

[Cara Melia]

This is Ed Porter from Auckland in New Zealand. In listening to the closing credits for each episode, I have become concerned that Karen Martin does not appear to have had a day off for several years. So I am now making a welfare inquiry as to her well being. If you are not being forcibly held against your will, I would appreciate any sign you can provide to confirm all is well.

[Nick Miles]

Well, Ed, we put your message to Karen herself and this was her response.

[Cara Melia]

Ed, I really appreciate you getting in touch and the concern that you shared. I'll be sending it on to the higher ups and requesting more time off. But seriously though, I'm lucky enough to lead a team of amazing journalists who all work really hard behind the scenes and not all of them get a name check. So luckily for me, yes, I am the editor of the overall podcast and that is a massive privilege. But do I have the odd day off? Yes, I do. Thanks, Ed. Be more red, everyone.

[Nick Miles]

And that is all from the Happy Pod for now. If you have a story you think would bring happiness or inspiration to other listeners, we would love to hear from you. As ever, the address is globalpodcastbc.co.uk and you can now watch some of our interviews on YouTube just search for the Happy pot. This edition was mixed by Sydney Dundon and the producers were Holly Gibbs and Rachel Bulkley. The editor, as we heard, is Karen Martin. I'm Nick Miles and until next time, goodbye.