← Going Big! with Kevin Gentry
Going Big! with Kevin Gentry
Going Big with Kay Coles James: From the Kitchen Table to the White House
00:43:33
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- [00:01]
Kevin Gentry
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- [00:31]
Kay Coles James
When you have that level of trust, you can walk through life unbothered, you can do what comes up next. Unbothered, you can go and hang out with my buddies in the hood. Unbothered, you can go and sit in the White House. Unbothered, you can go through life. When you have that level of trust and that level of faith, you can be unbothered. And I wish I had learned that sooner and I would not have been as uptight, as anxious, as concerned as I was as I grew. And the other thing that I think I would wish I had known and I could have told my younger self, I think it would be that relationships and people matter more than anything.
- [01:35]
Podcast Host/Announcer
Welcome to the Going Big Podcast. I'm your host, Kevin Gentry, and this is the place where we celebrate bold moves and big ideas. Each week, I sit down with inspiring leaders, entrepreneurs and change makers who are making a significant impact in their careers and in their communities. Whether you're looking to level up your leadership or pursue your passion or just get inspired to take your next big leap, this is where those stories come to life. Now, if you're listening on iTunes, YouTube, or anywhere else you tune into podcasts, be sure to hit that subscribe button so you'll never miss an episode. Now let's dive in to what it means to truly go big.
- [02:18]
Kevin Gentry
Well, ladies and gentlemen, today on the Going Big Podcast, it's a real treat to have Kay Coles. James. She is surely one of the most remarkable people I have ever known. As you're about to see, she has the resume of at least five different people. She has been the national director of the Office of Personnel Management. So that means in a presidential administration, that's the head of human resources. She has served in multiple presidential administrations. She's been a cabinet secretary and at least two Virginia gubernatorial administrations. She's been the president of the Heritage foundation, one of the most widely supported and influential think tanks. She's been a college dean. She served on the Fairfax County, Virginia, school board. She has been on the board of James Madison University and Focus on the Family. She's held many Other roles she's been an author, founder of the Gloucester Institute. We got a lot to talk about today. Kay, there's just. You are the epitome of going big. But here's my first question for you. Yes, I first met you a while ago. I think it was about 40 years ago. So that would mean you were like 7 or 8 years old for sure. Yes. And you were speaking at an event and you were the spokesman for the National Right to Life Committee. And I was just blown away about your personal story and about how you shared it. So if you wouldn't mind, kick us off, tell us about how you kind of came into this place and then we can cover a lot for the next 40 years after you start us off.
- [03:55]
Kay Coles James
Wow. Well, first of all, Kevin, thank you so much for having me here and to be with you, who are very special, longtime friend. Just thank you. It's amazing to me when I sit back and listen, I had no idea that I had had the privilege of doing all that stuff. Hearing it all at one time just makes me tired listening to it. But I did get started and get pulled out of my kitchen as a housewife and a mom because I was so concerned about the fact that there was a member of the human family that that I thought was underrepresented. And I didn't put all the pieces together until I was standing on a stage talking about the abortion issue. And my opponent challenged me and said, how dare you, with your middle class values think that you can step in and tell a poor woman how to lead her life. And what self respecting mother would bring a child into the world under these circumstances? You know, she just went on and on and on and the more she talked, the more indignant I got. But I put some things together that I never really thought about before. And so my response to her, which is what I shared on the first time you and I ever met, was that I was curious as to how she would in fact counsel that woman if that woman who was pregnant was sitting in front of her. A poor woman, a woman that already had five children, couldn't feed her family, didn't know how in the world she was going to keep heat in the house and maintain any kind of normal life for the kids she already had. And my opponent had said no self respecting woman would bring a child into the world under those circumstances. And I explained to her that I had a vested interest in how she would counsel that woman because that woman was in fact my mother. And I was born to a welfare mom who Couldn't afford to go to the hospital. I was delivered by a nurse midwife on a kitchen table. That's why I like to tell people I was born in the kitchen, because I, in fact was. And I put those pieces together for the first time. And it was a very compelling story, I think. And it helped me to shape my views on the life issue which drive me to this day. The fact that, you know, I couldn't give her on the pre birth side of the womb some sort of certificate that I was going to be a contributing member of society. But Kevin, I think God has blessed me with an incredible life with incredible opportunities. And there's no way anyone could have predicted back in 1949 on a kitchen table in Portsmouth, Virginia, that I was going to have the opportunity to contribute to our world like I did. And so I decided to dedicate my life to making sure that every preborn child had the right to live and walk and love among us and that they would be welcome to our world. And we can't predict on the pre birth side of the womb how someone's life is going to go.
- [07:21]
Kevin Gentry
Well, Kay, I mean, your life experiences make you all the more effective and as a communicator, but you have these many gifts of communication. And I'm telling you, you know, I met you and you shared that story 40 years ago. Since that time, you've achieved all these extraordinary things. And I do want to go into some of these. But did you always want to go big? I mean, at what point in your life did you really aspire to make a difference? And we can all define going big in different ways, but you've made a difference in the lives of others. You made a difference in the lives of your family, you made a difference in the lives of your many friends, but you've made a difference in the lives of many people, including also many of those preborn.
- [08:09]
Kay Coles James
You know, Kevin, I hope this doesn't destroy the entire premise of your show. I never, ever want it to go big. I never did. It's interesting the, the driving factor for me. And as you know, much of my life is based on and driven by my faith. And the reality is I just wanted to be faithful to the call of God on my life. And I was a stay at home mom, I was a housewife, completely content in that role. And it was the opportunities that came along which many I rejected by the way, along the way. And so my desire was to be faithful. My desire wasn't to go big. But I would say this, if you are faithful to the call of God on your life. If you are willing to be used in this world in incredible and mighty ways, the opportunities will in fact come. There's so many needs out there. We are just, I think, all of us trying to figure out what our particular piece of that is and what our calling is. And so I've gone bigger than I ever thought I would. But it comes from being, making myself available to be used in all of the various situations. Almost every one of those jobs that you ran off, I was called to. I used to tell high school guidance counselors when they would ask me to come in and do career days, I'm your worst speaker for career day. Because when they ask the question, how did you plan this? How did you strategize to get where you were? I never did any of that, but I always, always wanted to make myself available for kingdom work.
- [10:08]
Kevin Gentry
Well, you know, actually, Kay, what has come out in so many of these interviews I've had on the Going Big podcast is the issue of calling. And I'd say that comes out more than anything else. There's another item that comes out which I'll address in a little bit later, but in its finding your calling. And I've interviewed a number of people who, like you, didn't aspire to go big. They didn't say I'm going to go big, but frankly, they went big by pursuing their calling. So that's, that's pretty neat. But here's my next question. So when I knew you, you were in a, in a communications, a public relations, public facing role. But, but you went then into a number of leadership roles. How did that happen? Tell us a little bit more about the trajectory. Now, you said it was your call, you were called to do it, but how did that begin to happen?
- [11:02]
Kay Coles James
Well, you know, I have been blessed with some tremendous mentors in my life, people.
- [11:08]
Kevin Gentry
By the way, I'm going to stop you right there. Mentors is the other. Calling is the number one thing people talk about and mentors is the other thing that people talk about. So keep going.
- [11:18]
Kay Coles James
Well, by the way, my daughter, who many people have called Kjames 2.0, she's everything I wish I had been. She's phenomenal woman. I named her after the two women who had the most impact on my life. Her name is Elizabeth Joyce, and she's named after someone you may know, Elizabeth York, who was very involved in the pro life movement in Virginia, and Joyce Ranson, who both came along and walked beside me as a college student. And influenced me, who taught me, who mentored me. And so I think those two women, plus the grit of my mother. Imagine having six children and a husband who's an alcoholic, who deserts the family, and having to fight to raise six children with very little money, very little resources, but a very strong family and a very strong faith. So I think those three women gave me the grit, the knowledge, the skills in order to take on the tasks that were before me. So when opportunities came along and there was a lot of risk taking, a lot of risk taking. But when you have sort of the love and the security of family and friends and your faith, you can take those risks, and you end up going big whether you intend to or not.
- [12:57]
Kevin Gentry
Well, okay, so you've been a trailblazer in many respects, especially in public life and public service, which is another just remarkable thing. Tell us a little bit about that and what has challenged you? Just a little bit about that. And I have a great follow up on that from a friend of yours who has a lot to say about your special gifts and your calling. But first, tell us a little bit about how you saw that in the challenges of public life.
- [13:29]
Kay Coles James
Well, public life was a real challenge for me. I was trying to balance what it meant for my first calling, which was to be a good wife and a good mother, and balancing that with all of them demands of being in public life. So that was always a challenge. And I think one of the most difficult conversations I ever had was when I was on the road and speaking somewhere and I called home, and my youngest child said to me, mom, why won't you come home? Not, why can't you come home? I could have handled that a whole lot better, but why won't you come home? And trying to make sure that I always kept that balance between the calling that I felt on my life and what it meant to be wife and mother. And I remember thinking one night in a hotel room, if I saved every unborn child in America and lost one of my three, I would have failed in God's primary mission for my life. So I always had to work hard to keep that challenge of being a good wife and a good mother there. And one of the ways that that happened is by our family taking on this mission. This was not a Kay Coles James mission. This was a James family mission. And so Charles has been intimately a part of everything that I've ever done. My children have been involved in everything that I've ever done. And they are the support team. They are the wind beneath my wings. They are the ones that kept me going during all of those trying times. But that's always been a big challenge. And Kevin, I would say the other one is making the decisions. With so many opportunities out there, which is which? Finding the right path, what is the next right thing? And I had to learn over the years how to deal with that. I can remember when I was leaving the Heritage foundation and I got so if I had a dollar for everyone who said, so what are you going to do next? I'd be rich. Which would be really nice.
- [15:43]
Kevin Gentry
Hadn't you done enough by then?
- [15:45]
Kay Coles James
Well, you know, I don't know. Maybe not. Because what I said was I was gonna. And this is exactly what I did. I said, when I'm gonna finish strong, run through the tape, and then I'm gonna go home and sit on my sofa and watch I Love Lucy reruns until God tells me what's next. And that's pretty much what I did. And it wasn't too long before I got a call from Glenn Youngkin and I'd already been working with him on and he asked if I would come in and serve as Secretary of the Commonwealth. And I said, well, I guess that's what's next. So that's what I did. I didn't have a grand plan or a scheme or strategy for how to make that happen. So again, I go back to making yourself available and being willing to take a risk and step into jobs and opportunities and things that you may not feel you're qualified or capable of doing.
- [16:40]
Kevin Gentry
Well, you also are always such a happy warrior. So it's such a pleasure to work with you. But you know, you touched on, you know, life is full of trade offs. And I had this conversation on the podcast a few weeks ago with the Reverend John Yates of the Falls Church and said, you know, so many times the peak time of our lives to contribute is also at that point when we are newly married and raising a family and making those trade offs and how do you do that? And you give your credit to your husband, Charles James and your kids, but it's not easy. So go ahead.
- [17:20]
Kay Coles James
No, it is not easy. It's not easy at all. But there's some few tricks of the trade you learn along the way. And I have learned that we have to at least two times a year step back from life and take stock because you can spiral out of control. And taking a look at your calendar and asking the tough questions about things that matter and what I've had to struggle with over the years is you get so many requests and you want to do them all, and they're all vital and they're all important. But learning how to make decisions and choices about priorities and, you know, it helps to have your husband as a part of the scheduling process because he's really good at saying no.
- [18:10]
Kevin Gentry
Well, you've led institutions as varied as think tanks, government agencies, other different nonprofits. What have you learned that it takes to lead and inspire others?
- [18:27]
Kay Coles James
Well, what have I learned? First of all, I have found out over the years that people really appreciate authenticity. And once I decided that I was going to let the world see who K. James really, truly is, once I decided that I was not going to be hesitant to talk about my faith, that I wasn't going to be hesitant to talk about how much I love and adore my husband and how important my children are to me, that I can fry chicken better than anybody else on the planet, and that I love being in my kitchen and baking. I have found that people appreciate authentic leadership. The reason that I've stayed in the public sector for as long as I have, Kevin, is because of my love for my family. And I promised my grandchildren that I wanted to leave them a world that's at least as free as the one I inherited. And when you think about how old I am, and by the way, I start speeches these days by telling someone to take out their phone and Google the average life expectancy of an African American female. And the answer is 76.5 years. I am 76.5 years old. So what that means by definition is I don't have time to play. I gotta get some stuff done. We gotta finish strong. And the world right now, as far as I'm concerned, is as troubled as I have ever seen it in my lifetime. And so there's no time to rest. I don't think retirement is anywhere in the future. I still work. I just don't get paid. So there's a lot of work to be done. So there is no retirement. Just. It is overwhelming at this point how much is out there that still needs to get done.
- [20:27]
Kevin Gentry
Well, God bless you and don't you dare retire anytime soon. We got to get another 76.5 years out of you at least. So I mentioned I just reached out to a number of different friends of yours and asked him for some suggested.
- [20:40]
Kay Coles James
Ever since you said that, I've been skipping, scared to death.
- [20:43]
Kevin Gentry
I noticed that I saw a little nervousness. It's okay. It does sound a little bit like that old TV show, this is your Life, but it's all very positive. So I reached out to former Governor George Allen, and he, of course, holds you an enormously high regard and said, and this is what he emailed me in response. He goes, kay James is about as smart, principled, and articulate as it comes and has those special life experiences that made her the best person to be my Secretary of Health and Human Services. And she proposed and got through a balking legislature. A heck of an accomplishment. Virginia became the first in the nation with the statewide welfare reform law. But not only that, it was how you were a teammate, and not only in the passage, but in getting the fighting to obtain the waivers from the Clinton administration and then going through a lot of the legal battles. And so he says that you deserve the most valuable a MVP award. Of course he does in achieving such meaningful reform. And I had Speaker Newt Gingrich on here a few weeks ago, and he talked about Virginia being, you know, the role model, the trailblazer. So George Allen says, you were loved and respected by everyone who had the pleasure of knowing you. And he says, I always look forward to getting a good dose of K and Charles James's witness and wisdom. But what he also said was that you were able to navigate and achieve all these things working with people. I'd like to get your thoughts. Having served in government, how, I guess I might say on the one hand, how you had the patience and strength to put up with all the craziness in working in government, but how did you manage to convince people to take these positions that they were against, both in the state legislature in Virginia, the Clinton administration, other things, any advice you might have for people, especially these days, about how to talk and work effectively more with people who have different opinions.
- [22:42]
Kay Coles James
Oh, Kevin, that's such a great question. And let me say of George Allen, boy, I have had the opportunity to work for some of the most principled politicians, and it's easy to lay it all on the line when you're working for people like George Allen and like Glenn Youngkin. I mean, my word, you don't mind getting up every day and leaving nothing undone and working hard for people like that. But I'll tell you, one of the things that I think that we've lost sight of is something I used to say to the interns at the Heritage Foundation. I would start off by saying to them, how many of you are here to learn all of the arguments, the data, get all the research and the analysis so. So that you can go out and annihilate the enemy and they go, yes. And they raise their hands and I'd say, well, I am so sorry, but you're in the wrong program. That's not why you're here. We're here to build bridges, not blow them up. We're here to, as Ed Fullmer used to say, multiply and add to the movement, not to divide or subtract. And so I always approach every difficult or complex or controversial issue with how do I articulate it in winsome ways that will win people over? I want to convince people. And so I spend a lot more time listening. I spend a lot more time trying to understand an opposing point of view. And I always try to find areas of consensus. Let's start with what we all agree on. And quite frankly, Kevin, when I took over at the Heritage foundation, they said, who are you going to try to win? Who are you going after? And I said, bernie Sanders voters. And that took a lot of people back. And I said, because I defy them to say that they care more about poor people than I do, and because they don't, I defy them to say that they care more about educating and closing the education gap in our schools, because I care deeply about that. I care deeply about the health and well being of people in our communities. We have very, very different ways of how we approach and solve those problems. But if we start at the point where we want to fix the same things, then we can argue all day long and go back and forth about the best ways to get that done. And at the end of the day, I felt confident in making those assertions because we have the research, the data, and the analysis to show that our perspectives are the ones that produce the right results.
- [25:43]
Kevin Gentry
Wow. Well, my next question was going to be how do you serve and stay true to your values? But I think you just answered that. That's really quite extraordinary. Kay, thank you.
- [25:55]
Kay Coles James
You're welcome. And I do apologize. I don't know if you can hear the yard workers out there.
- [26:00]
Kevin Gentry
No, you're fine, you're fine. That just adds to your authenticity.
- [26:04]
Kay Coles James
Okay. Well, they are authentically blowing believes right now.
- [26:09]
Kevin Gentry
Well, all we need is for your dog booker to come running through and chasing a squirrel, but we'll be good. This is. This is. So, Kay, speaking of the polarization and craziness that we face in the country, in the world today, you founded the Gloucester Institute a number of years ago, but you're bringing up these new leaders to face a very changing world. And what's your vision for what you're doing there? Tell us a little bit more about the Glosser Institute, Glossary Institute.
- [26:37]
Kay Coles James
Thank you, Kevin. And, and, and for the your listeners, I want them to know this. The first, not the second or the third, but the first person I went to when I started the Gloucester Institute was Kevin Gentry.
- [26:53]
Kevin Gentry
Oh, my goodness, you had a bad Rolodex.
- [26:58]
Kay Coles James
Oh, no, no, not at all. And I remember we went out for coffee and I told you what I wanted to do and I was, you know, you were very encouraging. So I want to thank you for that and that you play a very important role in the history of the Gloucester Institute.
- [27:13]
Kevin Gentry
That's pretty funny. I don't know what I said, but if I was encouraging, it must have worked because you've done a phenomenal job. And I would. Let's hear because we and this for listeners all over the world, what is the Gloucester Gloucester Institute? Institute. I don't know why I can't pronounce Gloucester. My brother and sister in law live in Gloucester. But why? What is the Gloucester Institute? What's the vision you had for it? Tell us a little bit about the story and, and what's going on today.
- [27:35]
Kay Coles James
Well, I started going to the Moton center when I was about five years old. It was back during a time when African Americans could not go to resorts or convention centers or stay in hotels. It was a segregated America, but there were these little havens where the social and cultural elite in the African American community could gather. Today the Moton center is on the National Historic Registry as well as the Virginia Historic Registry as one of the most iconic and important civil rights destinations in America. But I was brought there, picked up from the public housing projects with my little suitcase to go with my cousin who was in fact a part of that cultural and social elite. And I would go as her companion. And I remember going there, Kevin, as a kid and sitting on the floor in the living room while the beautiful adults talked about and debated the important issues of the day. And it was the gathering place. Every great civil rights leader in America spent some time there, from Martin Luther King, Andy Young, the Greensboro Four who integrated the lunch counters in the south, the attorneys from Brown vs. Board of Education all came there. And so when I was leaving government at one particular point in time and we were trying to figure out what next and I was going to do my go home, sit on the sofa and wait to see. I said, while I wait, I'm going to go down and see what's going on at that place I used to go to as a child and I went there, Kevin, and the windows were broken out and there were vines growing up. The roof was off. And I couldn't figure out why is it that the place that's called the cradle of the civil rights movement has windows broken out and no roof, and yet Monticello flourishes and let Mount Vernon is very well taken care of. And so I decided that I felt a calling to form a nonprofit, purchase this property and restore not only the bricks and mortar, but restore. What happened there, and what happened there is where people came together from opposing points of view to solve problems. And so we've developed a new language at the Gloucester Institute. We're called Solutionist. I don't care if you're a Republican or a Democrat, liberal or conservative, if you are willing to set aside labels, let come together, let the data show us the way, what works, what doesn't work and solve problems, you're welcome to come. And so we are raising up a generation of solutionists. At the same time, we're preserving the historic legacy of that property. So we take these young people, identifiable leaders on their college campuses, and give them the requisite skills that they will need to lead. How to build consensus, how to be critical thinkers, how in fact to solve problems, how to work across party lines. And so if there's no else, no other place in the country, or no other place in the Commonwealth of Virginia, here at the Gloucester Institute, our desire is to bring people of goodwill together to solve the big important problems of the day. And so we've taken on every issue. I don't care how controversial, if you're willing to listen, willing to work, and really want to solve problems, you're welcome. If you want to yell bumper stickers at each other, if you want to be partisan and tribal, there's no place for you there. But if you really want to fix the problems that face our world and our country today, this is the place to come, the place to be. And so we create an environment where that can happen. It's a nine bedroom mansion on the banks of the York River. We've included things that enhance that experience so that you can be there and relax with people of differing and diverse perspectives and points of view. And we've seen so many good things come out of that. We've seen real conversations take place. And Dr. Moten, whose home it was, by the way, sincerely believed that the really big, scary, hairy issues of the day are resolved basically outside of government anyway. And it's by people who make up their minds that they want to see A better world, that they want to do things differently. And so he would say, if there's a problem to be fixed, who are the 10 people that, if they agreed, could solve it today, could solve it today? Sometimes that may be a politician, sometimes it may be a pastor from a local church, Sometimes it may be a community organizer, Sometimes it could be a college president. But if you bring those people together to attack the important problems of the day, big things can happen.
- [33:08]
Kevin Gentry
Wow. Well, ladies and gentlemen, I told you that Kay James has the resume of five different people. So we could just talk about the Glosser Institute on the Going Big podcast. And if people want to learn more, how could they just Google Glosser Institute?
- [33:22]
Kay Coles James
Oh, yeah. Well, with social media as it is today, we are on Facebook, Instagram. We do have a web presence, and we would encourage you to check it out and take part in some of the programs that we offer there.
- [33:39]
Kevin Gentry
All right, well, earlier we talked about. We talked about the importance of calling, and we. And we talked about the importance of mentors. And you talked about your own mentors who were key in your life. And you just also talked about your sister, a cousin that took you to the Motion Center. Who was it? Oh, yeah, cousin that took you to the Moton Center. Talk to us a little bit about mentors and how you see the role of a mentor and a mentee. I think that's a really key to the success of the Glossary Institute. I run into so many people who've been mentored by K. Coles James and love what you did for them. Talk a little bit about your thoughts there.
- [34:23]
Kay Coles James
Well, you know, there's been some change in language over the years. We used to talk in terms only of mentors, and now we tend to talk in terms of champions. Because I have found that the people who were really important in my life didn't just mentor me, but they championed me. And so I have determined to be a champion for the young people that come into my orbit. So I am interested, and I ask their permission to speak into their lives, because very often to have an effect on someone's life, you've got to have permission to speak honestly, you've got to have permission to say the things that need to be said. But the only way that happens is within a very short period of time, I have to convince them that I care deeply for them, that I want to see them succeed, that I don't want them to make the same mistakes that I made, that I want them to learn from all of the opportunities that I've had. And so trust to me is the first level because you can't tell someone that they need to work on their diction and enunciation if they don't believe you love them enough to tell them that. You can't tell that young girl on the college campus that her skirt is so short it's distracting unless she believes you have her best interest in mind. And I have been blessed with people who've come into my life that I know care deeply for me, that will knock down doors for me that won't just open doors, they will knock them down on my behalf. And so as a result of that, you know, I feel compelled to pay that forward. And so I have become the champion for so many people because I have been the beneficiary of that in my own life.
- [36:40]
Kevin Gentry
So essentially you're talking about people, you're believing in people.
- [36:43]
Kay Coles James
Oh, there's so much potential out there, Kevin. People who have so much to add to our world that can solve these problems. And quite frankly, I am delighted to have shifted my focus from current leadership. I'm going to let them go do whatever they're going to do. And my focus is on this next generation coming up. Let's work with them before they get into these leadership positions to understand what it means to solve problems together, to be critical thinkers so that they just don't develop all of their opinions off of Twitter, that they don't get their news from TikTok that they know how to read and solve problems and work together. We so desperately need it in our world. We're in pretty desperate times.
- [37:45]
Kevin Gentry
Well, good insights, good, good wisdom. All right, Kay, I'd like to bring this to a close. I always ask these two final questions and the first is looking back at a, we'll say a 21 version, 21 year old version of yourself, knowing what you know today. What advice would you give that much, that younger version of K. Coles James today?
- [38:13]
Kay Coles James
Couple of things, wow. If I could have said to myself or known the 21 year old version, I, I think I would have said I didn't understand Kevin until way too late in life, what it meant to really, I mean really trust God, to trust him with my life, my future, my career. And when you get to that place where you are abiding in him, dwelling in him, trusting in him. My mother in law had a phrase she used to you. She said, I am so unbothered. When you have that level of trust, you can walk through life unbothered. You can do what comes up next Unbothered, you can go and hang out with my buddies in the hood. Unbothered, you can go and sit in the White House. Unbothered, you can, you can go through life when you have that level of trust and that level of faith, you can be unbothered. And I wish I had learned that sooner, and I would not have been as uptight, as anxious, as concerned as I was as I grew. And the other thing that I think I would wish I had known and I could have told my younger self, I think it would be that relationships and people matter more than anything. I am not going to destroy a relationship or a friendship over a difference of opinion or policy. There's so much more to a person. And I look at where we are in our country today, where we have family members that don't even speak to each other over politics. And that's so sad to me. So.
- [40:21]
Kevin Gentry
All right. Well, thank you. Awesome. All good stuff. All right, so to close this out, the last question, it's amazing that you said what you did, because the other person that I reached out to for an insight is a person you mentioned earlier, and that's Virginia Governor Glenn Youngkin. And so we had Governor George Allen and then Governor Glenn Youngkin. He said he sent me this message when I asked him, and he said, I love Kay. I love her heart. Her faith in Jesus literally beams and her deep compassion for others is a welcome sign for a relationship that will change your life. I love Kay's wisdom, grounded in conservative values and forged an amazing life experience and always shared in a no nonsense, yet loving way. And I love Kay's impact on the next generation. They all want to be in Mother Kay's orbit. That is really special. Yes, I love Kay Coles. James. So those are the words of Virginia Governor Glenn Youngkin to close us out. Kay, what advice to anyone listening after what you've just said, all we've talked about, heard how we should all think about living the kind of meaningful, purposeful life that you led and will continue to lead for at least another 50, no, 75.6 years.
- [41:45]
Kay Coles James
Oh, Kevin. First of all, that literally, not figuratively, brought tears to my eyes. I have such respect for our governor and the Commonwealth of Virginia. And I have thanked God that the crown jewel of my public service was serving him.
- [42:03]
Kevin Gentry
He is just not done yet. So there may be yet another crown jewel, but we'll go there. Another podcast episode.
- [42:10]
Kay Coles James
Well, I know he's not done yet, but I also think I probably am. So I will watch from a distance and cheer him on. I will tell you, just being faithful to who you are, being an authentic person, wanting to leave. People always talk about leaving a carbon footprint. You know, what is your carbon footprint? And I want to know what is my footprint that I am leaving on this planet? Have I done well? Have I loved well? Have I served well? And I think when you get to the end of days, to be able to look back and think about the privilege of having loved well, lived well and served well doesn't get any better than that. And to me, that's what, that's what going big means. Loving big, living big, serving big well.
- [43:08]
Kevin Gentry
K. James, it has been a tremendous honor and privilege to have lived and loved with you for all these years and look forward to many decades to come. Thank you for being a very special guest today on the Going Big Podcast.
- [43:20]
Kay Coles James
Thank you, Kevin.
- [43:21]
Podcast Host/Announcer
Thanks for tuning in to the Going Big Podcast. I hope today's conversation left you feeling energized and ready to tackle your biggest goals. Don't forget to subscribe and leave us a review on iTunes, YouTube or wherever.
- [43:34]
Kevin Gentry
You listen to podcasts.
- [43:35]
Podcast Host/Announcer
It really helps spread the word and it gets these inspiring stories out to more people. You can also find more content, resources and updates at our website, goingbigpodcast.com Remember.
- [43:48]
Kevin Gentry
The only limits are are the ones.
- [43:50]
Podcast Host/Announcer
You don't challenge the limits that you impose on yourself. Keep pushing, keep growing, and above all, keep going big. See you next time on the Going Big Podcast.
- [44:03]
Kevin Gentry
Well, thanks again for joining us for another episode of the Going Big Podcast. I hope you were inspired to think big and to go big as a result of hearing these sorts of motivating conversations. And one more note about our sponsor for today, Zefie. Be sure to check out zefie.com register and find out how you can be one of more than 50,000 nonprofits that are taking advantage of this service that delivers 100% of an online donor's contribution directly to your important cause. No more fees. No more hassles. Check it out and we'll look forward to seeing you again on the next episode of the Going Big Podcast.