Podcast Summary: Good For You with Whitney Cummings

Episode 325: Resolutions | January 12, 2026

Overview

In this solo episode, Whitney Cummings dives into the idea of New Year's resolutions—exploring what they really mean, why people make them, and how she’s personally adjusting her approach for 2026. Mixing sharp personal anecdotes with her signature self-deprecation and comedic tangents, Whitney also addresses recent online accusations about her podcast’s legitimacy, poking fun at internet culture, trolls, and the bizarre economy around social media metrics.

Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. The Nature of New Year's Resolutions

• Whitney’s take: Resolutions are largely arbitrary, often rooted more in social or commercial pressures than real self-improvement ([00:31]).
  • "Is it based in capitalism to, like, sell calendars or gym memberships? Who invented the New Year's resolution thing? Big, big elliptical, big sit up, big squat?" ([02:32])
• Pat’s input: (Co-host) Resolutions should be possible any day; January 1 isn’t inherently special ([02:08]).

2. Whitney’s 2026 Resolutions

• Blocking negativity: Whitney resolves to "block" people online who bring negativity or trolling. She reframes this as self-care.
  • "This is the year that if you are a dork or a dweeb or a kook or a nut or a drip or a piss ant or a butthead—going to block you." ([04:09])
  • "This might be the year that I bully bullies. Maybe that's okay. File it under self-care, because you can do anything as long as you say it's self-care." ([05:42])
• No more piercings: She's putting a hold on adding more, realizing the need to mature past attention-seeking behaviors ([08:13]).
  • "No more attention. Unless it's my work. Like, I get plenty of attention. We don't have to hole punch my face all the time. I'm getting older. That's fine." ([08:37])
• Phone/social media use: Instead of the standard "reduce screen time" pledge, Whitney suggests curating feeds to follow smarter, more interesting people ([09:30]).
  • "I should scroll more. Just have it be smarter people." ([09:58])
• Shopping: Recommends not necessarily less scrolling, but less impulsive shopping ([10:21]).

3. Reflections on Social Media Trends

• Not caring what people think: Whitney argues that most people online already show a remarkable lack of concern for others' opinions and perhaps should start caring more—about the right people ([11:10]).
  • "I think we all need to care, like, way more about what other people think. Just the right people." ([12:13])

4. Online Criticism & Accusations

• Whitney openly responds to rumors that she uses bots to inflate her podcast numbers:
  • She explains how YouTube promotion actually works and debunks bot accusations ([28:52]).
  • "If anything they are accusing me of, to be clear, was true—Inflating numbers artificially on YouTube—are fraud. It's called fraud. YouTube would have taken my channel by now." ([28:36])
  • Her team uses YouTube's ad platform, just like any business promotes a product—no secret bot farms ([29:27]).
  • She auto-blocks hate comments for community health, not for hiding criticism ([32:33]).

5. Internet Trolls and the Attention Economy

• Whitney sees a strange kinship with trolls, noting how negativity fuels both sides and creates a peculiar online economy:
  • "You real live trolls, you're so much more robotic than any bot." ([41:50])
  • "For like an older dude podcaster to troll me is like, you're DOS, dude." ([41:54])
• She draws parallels between YouTube/podcast "takedown" content and her own fascinations, admitting she enjoys a good niche obsession herself ([43:01]).
  • "I love a weird cause. Like, my version of this is… I’m like Shirley Temple's agent. I'm a dog with a bone." ([44:01])

6. Self-Esteem and Adjusting to Haters

• Whitney is increasingly unfazed by criticism—seeing rampant attacks as an indicator of her relevance and success ([46:40]).
  • "It's what, like, it also, dorks… if you're going through old episodes and cutting them up to make me look bad, it—you're just making my numbers go up cause you're watching it. A hate watch is a watch, babe." ([46:42])
• She claims rejecting self-deprecation and leaning in to confidence, partly thanks to those trying to bring her down ([47:40]).

7. Observational Tangents & Humor

• Riffs about tech annoyances (power bricks, cords), TikTok culture, wellness trends, cult fascination, crowd work in stand-up, and hypothetical future Netflix documentaries ([10:24], [12:28], [20:47], [23:24]).

Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• On New Year's Resolutions:

  • "I'm gonna start telling you what's coming up, because I think you guys are starting to think, like, oh, she gets a bee in her mind about one thing and only talks about that the whole time." — Whitney ([01:28])

• On blocking trolls:

  • "This is the year that if you are a dork or a dweeb or a kook or a nut or a drip or a piss ant or a butthead—going to block you." ([04:09])

• On negative comments:

  • "Trying hard is cool if it's your job, but this is your hobby. You know what I mean? ... That's now your online footprint forever. I don't wanna be a part of your online footprint, you weirdo." ([06:38])

• On self-care:

  • "You can do anything as long as you say it's self-care." ([05:44])

• On stopping attention-seeking behaviors:

  • "No more attention. Unless it's my work. Like, I get plenty of attention. We don't have to hole punch my face all the time." ([08:37])

• On social media curation:

  • "I'm not going to get off my phone. It's not going to happen. That ship has sailed." ([09:30])

• On crowd work in stand-up:

  • "Every one of my shows, I just treat it like Star Search. I'm like, you, where you from? Be charming and maybe I'll put you in the pictures." ([21:20])

• On bot accusations:

  • "If anything they are accusing me of, to be clear, was true—Inflating numbers artificially on YouTube—are fraud. It's called fraud. YouTube would have taken my channel by now." ([28:36])

• On internet trolls:

  • "You real live trolls, you're so much more robotic than any bot." ([41:50])

• On haters boosting her self-esteem:

  • "You guys being this obsessed with me honestly has boosted my self-esteem. ... If it wasn't for you, I wouldn't know that not only is my podcast doing well because I'm too afraid to look at the numbers, but in order for yours to do well, you have to talk about me." ([49:25])

Timestamps for Key Segments

• 00:31: Whitney introduces the theme, pokes fun at resolutions and touring.
• 04:09 – 08:37: Whitney on blocking haters and ending piercings.
• 09:30 – 10:24: Thoughts on social media, phone use, shopping, and pointless tech accessories.
• 11:10 – 13:36: Why people should care more about what the right people think online.
• 20:30 – 21:52: Standup crowd work and its weird economy.
• 28:36 – 34:36: Addressing accusations of bot use, how YouTube promotion operates, and community moderation.
• 41:50 – 47:40: Whitney on being trolled, the strange world of attention economies, and how hate-watching drives up numbers.
• 49:25: Reflections on how haters inadvertently fuel her confidence and visibility.

Tone & Style

Whitney maintains her trademark conversational and self-aware comedic style throughout—rapid, tangent-filled, unapologetically honest, and often self-deprecating, even as she rejects the need for self-deprecation.

TL;DR

Whitney Cummings’ 2026 resolutions are less about self-improvement and more about boundaries, self-acceptance, and not feeding negativity—whether that means blocking trolls, ditching impulse buys, or ignoring unfounded accusations about her success. The episode is a whirlwind of witty observations on internet culture, stand-up comedy, attention-seeking, haters, and what it really means to "not care what people think." It’s equal parts candid, cathartic, and clever—vintage Whitney.