The Rizzler for Prime Minister

Summary

Good Guys Podcast – Episode Summary

Episode: The Rizzler for Prime Minister

Date: May 28, 2026
Hosts: Josh Peck & Ben Soffer

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Episode Overview

In this lively episode of Good Guys, hosts Josh Peck and Ben Soffer deliver their signature banter live from New York as they dive into food trends, American and global pop culture oddities, gym etiquette gripes, business dreams, and a healthy dose of nostalgia—plus a touching, hilarious digression on child actor legacies. The episode weaves humor with relatable everyday frustrations and sharp observations on modern life and fame.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Food Adventures in NYC

• Apollo Bagels Taste Test ([01:19]–[04:00])

  • Ben brings in trendy bagels from Apollo, which sparks a detailed, comedic review session.
  • Spontaneous bites, cream cheese mishaps, and playful lamenting about gluten abound.
  • Josh comments: “It’s like Mount Kilimanjaro. Kilimanfetta.” ([03:00])

• The Economics of Elevated Peasant Food ([06:02]–[06:31])

  • Both hosts reflect on the irony of waiting in line for simple foods such as bagels, pizza, ramen, and how cultures elevate these affordable staples.
  • “Bagels are the peasant food of our people... Pizza, peasant food, ramen. Peasant food. But it’s so damn good.” – Josh ([06:06]–[06:17])
  • “I’m not gonna wait in line for caviar. Who am I?” – Josh ([06:27])

• Frozen Yogurt & Snack Trends ([07:52]–[10:43])

  • Flashbacks to 90s Florida and diet trends, including massive frozen yogurt portions, sugar-free candies, and volume eating as coping or indulgence.
  • Both hosts dissect their ongoing food journeys, laughing about the consequences of sugar alcohols and the pursuit of feeling “svelte.”

2. Dieting Culture, Ozempic & Modern Health Fads

• Intermittent Fasting & Medication ([10:47]–[12:22])
  • Discussion on Josh’s struggle with intermittent fasting and Ben’s observations on how GLP-1 medications (e.g., Ozempic, Zepbound) quiet “food noise” and even curb drinking inclinations.
  • “This guy didn’t shut the fuck up for 34 years. Right now he’s a little quieter.” – Ben on constant food thoughts ([11:40])
  • “It doesn’t quiet that noise. It tells you to go buy a stool and a rope.” – Josh (dark humor about side effects, [11:56])

3. Pop Culture: What’s “American” Abroad? ([17:19]–[21:09])

• Foreign perceptions of American culture, like “Cool American” Doritos and the symbolism of red Solo cups.
• “What’s more American than a red solo cup? You know that song, Red Solo Cup? You fill me up, let’s have a party.” – Ben ([19:07])
• Lighthearted debate on music genres and where they fit socially (country vs. rap at barbecues, etc).

4. Gym Etiquette & “What Are You, Nuts?” Grievances

• Equinox Headbands & Ninja Warriors ([21:35]–[23:10])

  • Grown men over-accessorizing with headbands and setting up obstacle courses in public gyms get roasted.
  • “You’re not Rafa Nadal, Craig… This is not Wimbledon, Craig.” – Josh ([22:12])

• Avoiding Confrontation vs. Inviting It ([23:46]–[24:38])

  • Ben shares his approach: avoiding eye contact to prevent random New York City encounters.
  • Josh prefers directness, envisioning himself as a future ultra-engaged Walmart greeter.

5. Business Schemes: Franchises & Food Chains

• ChatGPT Picks Their Franchise ([31:05]–[33:53])

  • Josh and Ben consult “Chachi PT” about which fast-food franchise they should open.
  • Jersey Mike’s is crowned the best pick, with dreams of a “Good Guys Subs” concept and jokes about scaling hardships in the food business.
  • “You want good or great? I want great. Yeah. Give me two greats, and then I’ll cry and throw up.” – Ben ([33:03])

• Brand Collab Aspirations & Heartbreak ([34:18]–[39:44])

  • Tales of underwhelming brand freebies (like a $15 WingStop card for viral marketing) and notebooks from Cheesecake Factory.
  • “If you see it and you give a $15 gift card... We just assume you never saw it. We can just be pure fans.” – Ben ([36:24])

6. Luxury & Modesty in Cars and Wealth ([28:05]–[30:18])

• Josh and Ben muse on luxury cars, aspirations, and what feels “tacky” or unrelatable about high-end rides.
• “The X7 in matte olive... I love this color. That’s a sick car.” – Ben ([27:43])
• Admiration for Adam Sandler’s modest style: “When you’re accomplished… you can do f*** anything and make it cool. Yeah. Except for Warren Buffett. He needs a bigger house.” – Ben ([30:04])

7. Moron Mail – Relationship Dilemmas ([47:00]–[49:34])

• Listener writes in about fiancé always gifting handmade—but consistently late—gifts.
• Hosts agree: “If you’re gonna make something handmade… it’s gotta be on time.” – Ben ([47:59])
• Lively debate on if handmade always trumps store-bought, or if variety and timeliness matter more.

8. Child Star Reflections & “Rizzler” Musings ([51:06]–[55:25])

• Discussion about the hypothetical country “Hungary-is-Real,” playful speculation about Kelly Clarkson and “the Rizzler” as royalty.
• On childhood fame: “That’s the fine line that you’re dealing with with any kid actor—you just don’t know if it’s the thing that will follow them forever.” – Josh ([52:17])
• Tribute to Dustin “Screech” Diamond and the darker side of post-sitcom adult lives.

9. Comedy, Roast Culture, and Where to Draw the Line ([55:31]–[56:26])

• Recent Kevin Hart roast gets analyzed for boundary-pushing humor.
• “He goes really, really hard… but it does at least protect comedy a little. Because then you can point to that guy and say, that’s too much. And all of a sudden, the line’s being moved.” – Ben ([56:16])

10. Closing "What Are You, Nuts?" Moments ([56:37]–[59:13])

• Citibike for the elderly: “Just because you can rent it doesn’t mean you should, Josh.” – Ben ([56:56])
• Travel small talk and conversational quirks (Josh’s “where you headed?” encounter).
• Review bombing and why people leave two-star reviews: “Anybody that leaves a two star review for anything... What are you, nuts?” – Ben ([58:54])
• Final plugs for rating and subscribing, all in the duo’s self-aware, upbeat style.

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Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• “In my brain, we’re Joe Rogan.” – Josh ([01:00])
• “You’re not Rafa Nadal, Craig… This is not Wimbledon, Craig.” – Josh ([22:12])
• “If your cooking’s bad, let me tell you, you’re not using enough salt, okay?” – Ben promoting Diamond Crystal Kosher Salt ([41:50])
• “The grass isn’t always greener. There might not even be grass.” – Josh ([55:26])

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Important Timestamps

• Food Review & Bagel Drama: [01:19]–[04:00]
• Frozen Yogurt Nostalgia: [07:52]–[10:43]
• GLP-1 Medications Chat: [11:40]–[12:22]
• Pop Culture ‘What’s American?’: [17:19]–[21:09]
• Gym Etiquette Rant: [21:35]–[23:10]
• AI Franchise Business Picks: [31:05]–[33:53]
• Brand Disappointment Stories: [34:18]–[39:44]
• Listener ‘Moron Mail’ Relationship Advice: [47:00]–[49:34]
• Child Star & Nickname Musings: [51:06]–[55:25]
• Roast Comedy & Boundaries: [55:31]–[56:26]
• Final ‘What Are You, Nuts?’ Riffs: [56:37]–[59:13]

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Tone and Style Notes

• Relentlessly playful with authentic moments of vulnerability and sincere, occasionally dark humor.
• Heavy on cultural Jewish references and New York banter, self-deprecating, and often meta about podcasting itself.
• Conversational, rapid-fire back-and-forth, peppered with audience asides and nostalgic reflections.

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Summary:
This episode of Good Guys is quintessential Josh and Ben: part foodie escapade, part cultural roast, equal parts business brainstorm and therapeutic vent session. Brimming with observations on the absurdities of daily life, trends, and pop culture—plus their trademark “What are you, nuts?” enthusiasm—the result is a smart, self-aware, and laugh-out-loud audio tour of what it means to be a good guy in a very weird world.

Transcript

[A]

The following podcast is a dear media production. Two Jews, both big and tall. No subject too small for the good guys. A Mother Stream premium podcast team. Make it your weekly routine. It's a good guys. And if you don't give us five stars. What are you nuts? What are you nuts?

[B]

Yeah, we're the good guys.

[A]

They're not the great guys. We're just the good and good of the good guys. Mazamorons. I'm in New York City with my bestie, Ben, and we collaborated on our shirt collar. This is nuts.

[B]

This is nuts.

[A]

This is weird.

[B]

Really weird. We're the Men in Green.

[A]

This is like a Gap commercial

[B]

in green. Seeing you in person is just. It's just too good.

[A]

It's a game changer.

[B]

It's like we have a good podcast.

[A]

Yeah, good.

[B]

This podcast could be.

[A]

My God.

[B]

It's really a shame.

[A]

You know what's a shame? Is that you're right. We have a middle to very popular pod. But in my brain, we're Joe Rogan.

[B]

We. But this. This right now. Yeah, the men in green is Joe Rogan.

[A]

I feel like I'm on 106 and park right now.

[B]

No, no, we are. Yeah, we're there.

[A]

I'm Charlamagne.

[B]

We're hanging out. Yes, we're there. I'm there. By the way, speaking of 106 and park, and by that I mean 10th and third. Josh, have you heard of the Apollo bagels?

[A]

Third time you've asked. None of us have heard of it. No one's heard of the Engineer hasn't heard of it. I haven't heard of it. No one's heard of this bagel.

[B]

I saw this on TikTok. Okay.

[A]

Okay. And it must be good.

[B]

And they looked unbelievable. Today's a Friday, 10:30. There was a line. Yeah, nobody works anymore. Look at this. Ready? Look at this. I got two babies. They do Open faced.

[A]

Wow.

[B]

Isn't that lovely? Didn't that look good? Are you kidding me? That looks good, right? So that's their bagel and lox.

[A]

That's unbelievable.

[B]

And then. Josh, they're whitefish. Doesn't this look unbelievable?

[A]

Yeah, it looks insane.

[B]

Insane.

[A]

Oh, my God.

[B]

So we don't have to eat it now. We can eat it later. We can try it now. Whatever we want.

[A]

But yeah, maybe we should do a bite.

[B]

Okay, we'll do a bite.

[A]

Should we do it?

[B]

I'm gonna fall asleep.

[A]

I know you can't.

[B]

Damn it. All right, let's.

[A]

You in your gluten.

[B]

Let's.

[A]

Let's okay, let's go in here first. This is. Sorry about your studio. Smelling like smoked fish for the next 11 weeks.

[B]

Sorry, you mean you're welcome.

[A]

We get a candle. You're welco smoked fish. Here.

[B]

Cheers to us. To you. To. Oh, wow. Oh, that's fantastic.

[A]

The capers.

[B]

Is there some lemon? Oh my God. There's a glob of cream cheese on my pants. Fell through the middle. No, that's not right.

[A]

That sucks.

[B]

That's not right.

[A]

That hurts. Do you have a. We're gonna need a beef out.

[B]

This isn't right. But this isn't right.

[A]

That's no way to live. You know what I noticed too.

[B]

Can you see the. Can they see. Look at this. Look at this perfect club.

[A]

Oh my God. It's like Mount Kilimanjaro. Kilimanfetta.

[B]

If only I had the. If only I had the. You want to try the whitefish?

[A]

This.

[B]

Apparently this white fish, it said that there was mustard. I don't know where the mustard is, but look. I don't know if you can see this. This looks insane.

[A]

Are you single handedly keeping the whitefish industry in business?

[B]

Oh, for sure. Like even though Kirkland. Not Kirkland, Costco does the Blue Hill Big whitefish. Unless we're the only ones buying it. They do well at Costco.

[A]

I don't doubt it.

[B]

But cheers to this gorgeous.

[A]

Cheers. I don't think anyone in my Irish Catholic extended family have ever been like a next whitefish, you know.

[B]

Oh, lovely. And I get that tang of mustard.

[A]

Wow.

[B]

Really good.

[A]

What a time.

[B]

We'll put these aside.

[A]

It's our craft service. That wasn't even a brand deal.

[B]

You see, we're slim kings.

[A]

You have a delicious food. We'll try it on the podcast.

[B]

We're not against it 100%. It would be nice if the next time I go, I don't have to wait in that terrible line. Do you know how many times I thought to myself, you know, I'm going to leave. I'm not going to wait in this line. Yeah, it's not worth it. It's simply not worth it. Like, I'll just tell Josh, you know, I tried. I'll get credit for trying. Is it off?

[A]

No.

[B]

Here, Here.

[A]

Yeah, yeah, you're good.

[B]

But I'm not waiting on this line. How do I do this line? And then I waited on the line and it was worth it.

[A]

I vacillate between being. I guess I am. I'm like an egomaniac with an inferiority complex. Because at any Given time, I will say, josh, you're the lowest of the low. You're not so special.

[B]

That's the zap. I'm talking.

[A]

You think you're so great.

[B]

It's the zap.

[A]

Not the kind of get from Rocco. Absolutely not. But hoping to do a big social expanding campaign. Feel free to book at any time. I. And then in other times when I'm in those lines, they go, I'm too good for this.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

I said that. I'm waiting in line with you plebians.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

You know, you plebeians, you civilians.

[B]

Plebeians, civilians.

[A]

It's not right.

[B]

It's not right. But the thing is, it's not right for anybody to be waiting on line for food. I don't know how we adjust the experience. I also know, ironically, because this is who we are as human beings. If I got there and there was no line, I would have said, oh, this place. Isn't that all that this place isn't

[A]

the hype, not the bomb dot com.

[B]

Seeing other people waiting. It's funny, you walk into their store, very narrow. So the whole line on the street, that's 95% of the line.

[A]

Sure.

[B]

There's four people in that store. Probably by design.

[A]

Yes.

[B]

Because it appears to people like everyone's waiting, when really it's 18 people.

[A]

It's all appearances.

[B]

All appearances, Right.

[A]

Yeah. I just. I don't know who said it recently, but, like, I'm not willing to wait in line for any food.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

I'm especially not gonna wait in line for what is basically peasant food. Right.

[B]

Correct.

[A]

Bagels are the peasant food of our people. Correct. An inexpensive food, even when done well, pretty darn affordable.

[B]

Correct.

[A]

Pizza, peasant food, ramen. Peasant food. But it's so damn good.

[B]

It is.

[A]

Because these cultures, they elevate the food and they get the good ingredients.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

And they do the broth for three days, but never it's noodles and soup.

[B]

100%, you know, so I'm not gonna

[A]

wait in line for this, and I'm certainly not gonna wait in line for caviar. Who am I?

[B]

No, no. I'm not waiting in line. I'm not waiting in line for anything this surprisingly affordable. $16. I thought that was a pretty good price for a bagel and lox.

[A]

16 for just a bagel with lox bage. I feel like that's.

[B]

Is it standard?

[A]

Pretty stand.

[B]

It is.

[A]

Well, a bagel with cream cheese should be.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

I mean, it really should be three, but. Yeah. Okay.

[B]

Should be three. I agree.

[A]

And then 11 bucks for the.

[B]

For lunch. Yeah.

[A]

All right.

[B]

It felt. I wasn't upset. I saw it. I was like, okay, yeah, that makes sense to me.

[A]

This is gonna get real Jewishy complaining. So I went to a bodega near my hotel on my way here.

[B]

Okay.

[A]

I got my usual nice big ghost energy drink, sour pink lemonade.

[B]

Beautiful.

[A]

You know.

[B]

Yeah, sure.

[A]

I feel like I'm in 10th grade on heroin when I drink it.

[B]

Yeah, that's what it sounds like.

[A]

You know, you get a real sweet tooth with the opiates. I'm glitching. It's true. And I got one of my barbell protein bars. I hadn't eaten anything.

[B]

You farting like crazy.

[A]

Not yet.

[B]

Those make you fart.

[A]

It's coming.

[B]

No, they're bad. The Malitol, that's what it is. It's delicious. It's what's in all those sugar free candies. Your mom. Your mom definitely had these. Do you remember those, like, squishy dots that were sugar free?

[A]

Oh, we had everything.

[B]

The sugar free candy. You will actually. You're gonna have. You'll have a stomachache for a month. Yeah.

[A]

So worth it.

[B]

So delicious. Pencils and bear bells.

[A]

This might be before your time. I was around when frozen yogurt dropped, like, originated.

[B]

Like Tasty Delight.

[A]

You mean like Tasty Delight, but like the origination of like the diet frozen yogurt shop.

[B]

Yeah, yeah, No, I remember.

[A]

With way too much toppings.

[B]

Yeah. And no, they very much exist still in Florida.

[A]

You go in Florida.

[B]

Lactose free, dairy free, carb less kosher.

[A]

Yeah, kosher carbless.

[B]

There's nothing in it. Yeah. And then you get it and it tastes. It's like flav. It kind of smells like peanut butter, but it doesn't really taste like anything. And it will give you the world's worst gas.

[A]

Yes.

[B]

You're doomed. And they say it's 80 calories. You don't know what is 80 calories? That 80 calories for a half a cup. What is 80 calories? You get a large. I specifically remember my dad just getting enormous sugar free, dairy free ice creams.

[A]

Cause, you know, as a fellow food addict, it's like, it's volume.

[B]

Yeah. Okay.

[A]

We want to feel like we're crushing something.

[B]

Volume. I said to myself yesterday, I was like, cause I wanna lose a couple of pounds. We have a big night tomorrow night. I'm like, I wanna feel svelte. I wanna feel good. I want my brain to feel good. So I was like, you know, Ben, why don't you just try and eat a little bit less, that's all. You know, you're hungry, you don't need your playa bowls at 9 o'. Clock. How about you try not to eat until 12? I ruined it with two bites of Apollo. But what's two bites of Apollo? Nothing. Normally I'd be eating that whole thing. I'd be munching down, chomping down. It takes a lot of mental energy to go and say, I'm not going to eat all of that. But that's the key, not being a volume eater for me. Right. That's the key to weight loss. I can eat anything. I can eat anything. I just can't eat all of everything. All of anything.

[A]

I mean, my mom, who's also had her, you know, food journey in her life, I remember, like in the 90s when we lived in Boca Raton, Florida, when yogurt chops hit, she would get. I'm talking this 16 ounce iced coffee cup. It would be the equivalent to about three of these in frozen yogurt piled high. And it was like an eating disorder meetup. Right. Cause then there'd be one lady who would be about 92 pounds, who would come every single day, and she'd get the biggest frozen yogurt. And she would sit in her car and she would get a. This is. It's not to be joked about.

[B]

Yes, it is.

[A]

She would get a sample spoon, the mini spoon. Wow. And eat the Mount Kilimanjaro of yogurt with the sample spot fully in her car.

[B]

So it lasted.

[A]

And it had like 11 calories. The whole thing.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

But I just remember honking down those frozen yogurts. Carbolite.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

And then the new flavors would drop and it'd be the talk of the town.

[B]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. And they tasted good enough that they gave me a tummy ache.

[A]

Oh, God, what a journey. What a food journey we're all on.

[B]

Yeah. It's so interesting. And then when you. I mean, you've sort of mastered this a little bit with your. What is it, 16, eight that you do.

[A]

Oh, with my eating window, my intermittent vastness, which I've not been good on recently.

[B]

But like, once you realize if you don't eat today, you're not gonna die. I haven't been able to fully convince myself of that yet, but it's the truth. Like, what do we need to really eat once every three days?

[A]

I mean, technically.

[B]

Technically, I know we shouldn't.

[A]

I guess we'd survive.

[B]

We'd survive. We're not dying, sure. But especially. It might just be, like, Jewish culture. But it's like, if we miss dinner, we're dead.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Like, if you miss one singular meal, you're dead. Yeah. And I think that that's what's led. It's probably not just Jewish culture. It's probably American culture in general. That's what's led to this. Like, I need breakfast, I need a snack, I need lunch. I need a snack, I need dinner, I need dessert.

[A]

Right.

[B]

And that's why we're so fucking fat.

[A]

I've just.

[B]

And thinking about it, that's what the Ozempic and Zeppbound or whatever, anything from roe does. It quiets the food noise, which is, this guy didn't shut the fuck up for 34 years. Right now he's a little quieter.

[A]

Right. But it doesn't quiet that noise. It tells you to go buy stool and a rope. Can this ceiling fan hold me? Can you imagine? Oh, my God.

[B]

It's also stopping people from drinking. I have a lot of friends that are on any of these GLPs, and they're like, I have no urge to drink. I'm like, that's stuff for my business.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Right.

[A]

Oh, great. Thanks a lot.

[B]

That's tough.

[A]

Sprint Society promo code. Oh, God.

[B]

I was gonna say. Speaking of which, we have a new flavor that's in Target. It's over there. Even though none of you are gonna drink it. Yeah.

[A]

You should do a Zepbound collab with Spritz. Congratulations.

[B]

I'll show it to you anyways. Quickly. Even though none of you are gonna drink it. Josh, this is the skinny spritz. 100 calories, no sugar. Like an Aperol Spritz.

[A]

What is it normally calories?

[B]

120 and 8 grams of sugar. We're at 100, no sugar.

[A]

So gorge. Perfect.

[B]

You buy it at any Target locally or you don't have to buy it because you're on Zepbound and you're not drinking.

[A]

What if you're there, what does Aperol taste like? Orange.

[B]

Bitter orange.

[A]

Bitter orange.

[B]

Bitter orange. That's what it tastes like. Lightly bittered, it tastes like a slightly bitter orange soda.

[A]

Because I, you know, I've been.

[B]

You'd enjoy the taste of it. I think it would actually taste good as a mocktail. Mocktail? A mocktail. I mean, I turned it into an oxtail.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Yeah. That sounds nice. I love Moxtail.

[A]

I love Caribbean food.

[B]

Same. I bought jerk seasoning the other day. I haven't used it yet, so excited to just rub it On a nice piece of chicken.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Yeah, right? I think we don't. We don't cook with jerk enough at home. No, we're just jerking off. We're not cooking with jerk.

[A]

Yeah, we need to jerk hard.

[B]

We need to jerk off with jerk. Imagine taking a little jerk paste. Yeah, mom, stop listening.

[A]

Ava, turn it off now, please.

[B]

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[A]

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[B]

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[A]

Should we get to a weird story?

[B]

I would love to hear some weird news I think going on at the Post hq. What are they doing over there?

[A]

I just want to thank the New York Post for basically being our news department because no one else be doing it like them.

[B]

No. You guys, you guys know where to source this weird crap?

[A]

Well, foreigners hilariously revealed the stuff branded American to those outside the us. Doritos solo cups and more. This redefines what it means to be American. Do people in other countries have US finger traps? And little America residents of other nations are blowing United States residents minds after revealing what gets labeled American back home. Much of which isn't even popular in the home of the brave. Okay, ready? Cool. American Doritos.

[B]

Okay, wait, where are they calling like overseas? Their marketing is that they're cool instead of cool Ranch Doritos. It's cool. American Doritos. Exactly.

[A]

What's that? Cause you know in the US we have French fries, Belgian Waffles, Russian roulette, Greek yogurt.

[B]

I've never once thought of those regions, though, as I'm eating those foods.

[A]

Right.

[B]

It's just the French fry is. Where's the French fry invented? Definitely in America.

[A]

You think? I think so. They've been eating papas everywhere for.

[B]

I guess that's true. We've been frying potatoes for a long time.

[A]

We gotta be.

[B]

Yeah. We definitely invented the ratio of 90% fried to 10% potato, though.

[A]

Sure.

[B]

It's a very US thing, you know?

[A]

Oh, yeah. That's us all day.

[B]

Yeah. I feel like more like a steak fry was maybe, like, something that they used to do. Okay. But so a cool American. What else we got? Yeah.

[A]

They've also revealed that foreigners are enjoying solo cups that are being called American, by the way.

[B]

That's great. Wow. What's more American than a red solo cup? You know that song, Red Solo Cup? You fill me up, let's have a party.

[A]

Who is. That's a country music.

[B]

Kenny Chesney, maybe. Yeah, of course. It is so good. Is it Kenny Chesney? Do you know? Don't worry about it. Don't worry about it. It's not worth it. I lie all the time anyways.

[A]

I don't know. You know, that's the thing. But I guess, like, I love hip hop, right? So people that listen to that go like, who gives a shit about a chain?

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

You know, like, oh, you're Molly Percocet. Cool. Like, cool songs. But then I hear a country music song about, like, trucks and solo cups, and I'm like, really? This is appealing.

[B]

Yeah, no, it's the same thing.

[A]

It is.

[B]

Yeah. Yeah. Just depends on, like, who you are and what vibe you're in the mood for. I, like, I don't love country music, but when I hear a great country song. She loves it. She loves it.

[A]

The Osprey Girls in general, big country fans.

[B]

They've been big country fans when no one was country fans, which is so

[A]

anti their New York upbringing.

[B]

It's so funny.

[A]

They're such New Yorkers.

[B]

They're such New Yorkers. But they've loved country music forever. And now I feel like modern country is a little bit more me. Like, Luke Combs. Anything he releases is awesome. But, like, yeah, those old, older songs, but they're a vibe. It, like, depends on what you're in the mood for. Like, if you're in the mood to just, like, hang out and barbecue, it's, like, nice to, like, listen. Like, hardcore rap when you're Barbe. When do you listen to it? At the gym. It's like, I'd rather listen to rap at the gym than country music, but I don't think I could listen to rap at a barbecue. Right? You're flipping burgers, you're listening to Molly Percocett, and you're looking at your son.

[A]

Molly Percocet. I couldn't listen to like mumble rap or like, or, or like some crazy British drill rap in the middle of trying to have a couple burgers with the bros. Well, and I go.

[B]

And I go, yeah, the songs are insane, but they honestly, they're pretty hype. I hear them occasionally. Like, I'll like, go on like the wrong side of TikTok. I'm like, how did I end up here? Like, I don't British rap. Oh yeah. And they're pretty good. Yeah.

[A]

British rappers are crushing it. But I, yeah, I like, you know, I want to listen to some 90s rap. I want to listen to a little Nas Illmatic, a little, you know, I

[B]

just want to listen to, you know, me music. Pre2010. Yeah, that's me. That's all that I need. I've been listening to so much Neo. Oh my God, really? Oh, yeah, big time.

[A]

Great.

[B]

I love, like. Is that even considered old school R and B, I guess, like. Or is that like.

[A]

Yeah, Mid ought to R and B. He's a man.

[B]

I have a hundred Woody and utses, so I'll just give one right now, please. Men, grown men. Wearing headbands is a. What are you nuts, Josh? Okay, I'm not referencing durags. If it's a part of your culture. You want to wear a durag, no problem. I'm talking about the guy that's walking into an equinox wearing a headband. Sure. I walk past him. The one that you tie in the back. You think you're Rafa Nadal?

[A]

Sure.

[B]

You're not Rafa Nadal, Craig. You're going in for your personal training. You're a cpa, Craig, and you're walking in with it. At least have the human decency to put it on once you're already in the locker room.

[A]

Right?

[B]

You went from your apartment to equinox at 8 o' clock in the morning wearing a Rafa Nadal tied headband in Manhattan.

[A]

This is not Wimbledon, Craig.

[B]

I don't know what this is, Craig, but this is time for Craig to take a seat.

[A]

Craig's gotta get it together with your dumb headband.

[B]

So dumb. Right? It's stupid.

[A]

What amazes me at Equinox, there's at least two guys that I go at my local Equinox, which, you know, I love. I love. I'd never disparage my favorite gym in the world, but they can't control all the clientele.

[B]

Of course.

[A]

There are two guys who literally set up stations in the open areas so that they've got their own little mini obstacle course. I'm like, this isn't ninja warrior Dan.

[B]

No.

[A]

Like, hit the elliptical, do a couple

[B]

machines, get to the sauna and stop hogging the machines.

[A]

They're doing six foot box jumps.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

I'm like, the glory days are over.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

By the way, you're 42. Your credit score's 200.

[B]

Go get a personal gym. By the way, can't you get a private gym? Go somewhere else? This is a public gym. Yeah, like other people are there.

[A]

It's a lack of decorum.

[B]

It's terrible.

[A]

No one can keep it together.

[B]

No, you can't keep it together.

[A]

I just. I can't not say anything. Which means one day I'm not gonna be here anymore.

[B]

Yeah, you're gonna get punched in the face. I'm great at. I say nothing. Fake phone call is the way I approach my entire life. I see something. Do you know the last time that I locked eyes with a stranger on the street? When? I don't know. I have no idea. Like, I literally. I'm walking down the street, like we're crossing. I don't make eye contact with you for a fucking second. Because I know the second that I lock eyes with you, I'm toast. I'm toast.

[A]

Really?

[B]

Yeah. You're gonna wanna either converse with me, you're going to try and shiv me. You're going. I'm in trouble if I lock eyes with you.

[A]

Right?

[B]

On all ends of the spectrum, whether it's nice or whether it's danger. So. No. Same thing with the gym. Wow. I do my absolute best to avoid confrontation at all moments of the day.

[A]

I invite it.

[B]

I understand. My mom invites it too. My mom will call me. She's like, ben, you'll never believe it. Somebody threw a slushie at my car. I'm like, mom, I believe it. What did you do?

[A]

What did she do?

[B]

What did you do?

[A]

Just looked.

[B]

No, definitely not. She's like, I don't understand. Maybe he was there for the parking spot before me and I slid in behind him. But I should have. I'm entitled to the spot too. I'm like, please, mom, you're Gonna get yourself killed.

[A]

Yeah. My endgame is being a Walmart greeter.

[B]

Yeah, sure.

[A]

Like. Cause I'm good. I'll give you straight eye contact as you come in and I'll go, hi, Diane. Like, what are we getting? You know, like the, you know, the trans fats, aisle four. Yeah, you know, and I'll see. And you know, I'll be good at guessing too. Like, I'll see a, you know, a disenfranchised, you know, teenager, and I'll be like, you know, ammo, aisle 19. You know, wait, make sure I leave. Can I? Let me get out of here first. Just that way I'll be like, have fun, Tyler.

[B]

Someone should invent, like an AI greeter. Not to take more jobs from people. But how amazing. But how amazing would it be? So not for Walmart, for these places that already have greeters. I'm talking about the places that don't. I want to walk into my local grocery store and have somebody that tells me or something that tells me where everything is that I need. Wouldn't that be fantastic? I'm like walking around the grocery store, I finally find somebody that works there. I'm like, where's the jello? They're like, what do you need jello for?

[A]

Right?

[B]

Okay, I go find the jello and I check out. But it took me. If I didn't find magically stumble upon that person, I would have been searching those aisles for hours.

[A]

But it's coming, right? Because of the bane of our existence, which is self checkout. The prices never got cheaper than self checkout. But suddenly they were able to save on a bunch of employees. Cause I'm doing it correct. They don't say, hey, three bucks off your bill if you check out yourself.

[B]

Which isn't right.

[A]

And now I avoid normal checkout lines like it's the plague.

[B]

Interesting.

[A]

Cause I'm like. Cause I know it's gonn a lot of items, they're going to go. They're going to go a slower pace.

[B]

I want to.

[A]

I want to go in and out, but I'm not having human connection.

[B]

Yeah, no, you're not. You're not.

[A]

We're lacking.

[B]

We're lacking. We're also removing all color from the world. Have you noticed that? I went to.

[A]

That I can stand by.

[B]

I went to a. I went to 40 carats in Bloomingdale's. It used to be like the marquee, like retail restaurant. And it's all carrots. Like, there's bunches of carrots. It's orange. The Whole restaurant I went in the other day. It's like basically the color of our shirt. It's just like, maybe even closer to gray. It's like a gray green. I'm just like. It used to be so colorful. You look at old pictures of a park, look at the colors of the slides. Look at the McDonald's jungle gym. I just. When you stumble upon that. We're living in a society that is slowly ripping away color. It's very sad, Josh.

[A]

It's gonna. We need. We gotta have things that pop. We do individual, we do exciting.

[B]

We need more Joey Kamastas.

[A]

When I see someone with a red car, I go, you got something figured out? I don't.

[B]

Totally.

[A]

Cause I would never.

[B]

Never. But why? What have we associated? We've associated red cars with douchebags. Is that what it is?

[A]

I don't know. Why. I just think it's bold. But I'll be honest. I love the color blue.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

I'd have a dark blue car in a hot second if I wasn't worried about your judgment.

[B]

Totally. I would have. I would have a car the color of my shirt. I love this color. That's a sick car.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Think about that. My. The X7 in matte olive.

[A]

I think it's available.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

But I'd never buy it Manhattan Green.

[B]

But I'd never buy it Manhattan Green. Oh, I know that. Yeah, I know. You're right. They also make that for the Mini Cooper. Todd, you know Mini Cooper and BMW are the same company.

[A]

I do.

[B]

I didn't know that.

[A]

You know me, a big car guy.

[B]

Tricks of the trade. Unbelievable.

[A]

I love it.

[B]

And they share colors. Why would they. Yeah, I color in bulk.

[A]

I think you might be a little more. If I may say, like, maybe not. Maybe you're not more bougie than I am. Like, I. Cause I.

[B]

No, you're bougie with cars.

[A]

I'm bougie with cars.

[B]

Yeah. You have nice cars always.

[A]

I do, but, you know, accessible. Nice cars. Mass produce, Right?

[B]

Sure.

[A]

Like, my wife has a Land Rover, which she loves. Yeah. And I drive a Tesla, like a Model Y. But I think about that sometimes of like, you know, I grew up listening to rap music and so, like, of course, I've always dreamed of having a Rolls Royce. But if tomorrow someone was like, let's make it happen. I could never.

[B]

I don't think I could ever. With that too.

[A]

Ferrari, like, it's. Any of that high end shit.

[B]

It's too much. If I had. If I had enough money that I had a House somewhere far away that I didn't visit often, and I could park that car there and take it for a drive once a year. Yeah. If I'm there, sure. If this is sitting and being driven all the time, it's almost tacky. You know what I mean? How can you drive a $330,000 car every day? And then at the same time, it's like, how could you not? It's 330 grand. Like, I don't know who I see. There's a guy in Florida who drives his Bentley every day, and he must just love it. But I think to myself, it's just not. It. I don't know. I don't.

[A]

It's hard, right?

[B]

It's so hard. Who's supposed to drive them?

[A]

But could you imagine being like, I like the high low of it. Like, if I got nominated for an Academy Award and I pulled up in a Toyota Sienna minivan.

[B]

It's great, right?

[A]

With, like, the monitors on in the back. Yeah. And I'm like. And as I'm getting out there, like, josh, Josh, how did you do it? Like, we only thought you were good on Drake and Josh. And I'm like, I know. Everyone thought that. And I'm fucking. You know, I'm dusting up goldfish crackers from the seat. I'm like, sorry, guys, I'll be in in a second. You know, that's. That's who I want to be.

[B]

Yeah. I mean, that's. But that's like Adam Sandler in a nutshell. Like, you. He's so accomplished. So when you see him in basketball shorts, you're like, oh, it's cool to wear basketball shorts. It's so good when you're accomplished, really accomplished. You can do fucking anything and make it cool. Yeah. Except for Warren Buffett.

[A]

He needs to move Nebraska.

[B]

He. He needs a bigger house. I.

[A]

Have you been though?

[B]

No.

[A]

I have heard, because obviously it was probably a gigantic, big, beautiful house when he bought it in the seventies In. In Nebraska. I have heard whilst he hasn't moved, he has quite updated it.

[B]

Got it. Okay. Yeah. Okay, understood.

[A]

And it's like a compound.

[B]

Like, it's fantastic.

[A]

And it's also a military compound. Like, you are not getting close to that house. So.

[B]

So that makes me feel better.

[A]

But I think he also boug McDonald's on the corner so that he makes sure that he can get his Egg McMuffin breakfast every morning. What a power gym.

[B]

Are you kidding me? Never even thought about that. Buying a home in proximity to your favorite Fast food chain for easy access.

[A]

Should we ask Chachi?

[B]

Pt, Anything?

[A]

All the things. Okay. Ben and I want to invest

[B]

in

[A]

a franchise fast food establishment.

[B]

Which one is the best? Yeah, I think it's Raising Canes.

[A]

Which one is the best?

[B]

I'm clocking in Raising canes for these

[A]

two Jews, both big and tall.

[B]

Yes.

[A]

Okay. And we're thinking. We're thinking. We're tabulating. It's searching the web.

[B]

I'm getting ready to pump my fist for raising canes.

[A]

Raising canes. Can it be really? I almost did a brand deal with Raising Canes.

[B]

You should have.

[A]

Well, I wanted to, and then they pulled out.

[B]

Oh, that's on them.

[A]

But the owner was. And part of the stipulation was you had to follow the owner of Raising Canes.

[B]

I'm like, I'm fine, by the way. They are so rich. Raising canes. All of them are owned.

[A]

I love it.

[B]

92% are owned by that one guy.

[A]

Good for him.

[B]

Was I right?

[A]

You weren't.

[B]

Shit.

[A]

And honestly, it's even. You were even more right and didn't even know it because it's something you've talked about for us forever.

[B]

Something that I've spoken about for us forever. Jersey Mike's.

[A]

Jersey Mike's.

[B]

That makes sense. That makes sense.

[A]

That's what they're saying. Why it fits. Massive growth trajectory. Feels culturally hot right now without being cringe. But ours would be called New Jersey Mics.

[B]

Cause we're formal.

[A]

That'd be awesome.

[B]

It would be called Good Guys. It's the perfect name for a sandwich shop.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

You're borrowing a little bit from five guys. They're already thinking about it. Good Guys Subs. I've thought a lot about this. I've sent you the ideas. We have A good sub, 6 inches. A great sub is a foot long. Are you kidding me? You want good or great? I want great. Yeah. Give me two greats, and then I'll cry and throw up.

[A]

Great.

[B]

That's what makes it great.

[A]

So good. Yeah.

[B]

So fun. So hard, though. I've heard that that business is the hardest because you build one great store, you build two great stores. And then when you try and scale and the people that you're paying are making, even if you're paying really well, let's say they're making $20 an hour, they're typically, unfortunately, unhappy to be there. And then your sandwich just isn't the quality that it should be as you scale it. That big. It's so hard. So hard. Very few have been able to Crack it, my friend.

[A]

I think la minimum wage is closer to almost $25 an hour. My friend works for Instacart. They pay over minimum wage. Like minimum wage and then some. And mileage gas. I'm gonna pick up a couple rides, by the way.

[B]

That's great.

[A]

In between auditions and podcasts, Josh Peck's dropping off your CVS order, especially if

[B]

you need to, like, take. I always thought about that with Uber. Like, if you're somebody that drives long distances anyways, why not just pick someone up? I guess you can't choose where you're going.

[A]

Well, you can choose, like, send me in this direction.

[B]

Oh, you can?

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Oh, that's cool.

[A]

Like, when you're done at the end of the night, be like, I only want trips that are going to bring me closer to home.

[B]

Interesting. Yeah.

[A]

Maybe get them.

[B]

Maybe I start doing that.

[A]

Well, it's a number two restaurant, potentially the smartest. Pure business. Play Wingstop.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Delivery, native business, Lower seating requirements, late night appeal.

[B]

Interesting.

[A]

Of course, they've never supported the great Josh Peck.

[B]

No.

[A]

And I've eaten a shitload of it on camera.

[B]

No, they've never supported me, but they

[A]

sent me a $15 gift card once. So 15.

[B]

Thank you. 15.

[A]

This story I think you did.

[B]

I still can't get over it, though.

[A]

I did an epic 15.

[B]

Mukbang is horrible.

[A]

With David Dobrik. While he was at the pinnacle of his powers, this video got millions of views. Wingstop calls me. They go, we are so impressed. We would love to send you a little something. I said, Wingstops. I do it for the love of the game, not for the freebies. I do it for the chicken wings. They go, shut up. We're sending you. I go, fine, here's my address. Twist my arm, it comes. Nice stickers. Wow. What is swapping?

[B]

It was physically mailed.

[A]

It was stickers and probably a Wingstop hat and a gift card. I take the gift card. I go, this is very nice. I'm assuming it's like the Chipotle. A thousand dollars at least. I'm gonna have this. I' like, this will be great. I'll save it for the super bowl and I'll, you know, basically fund the entire super bowl party with it. So I go in one day and I order like 70 bucks worth of food for me and, like, a couple friends, and I give the card and I go, thank you so much. Yeah, I'm a platinum. I'm a. I'm a VIP. They go, that'll be 55. I was like, what? They're like. That's the difference. This was $15. It's so good.

[B]

I have a cousin that once on my birthday, wrote me a card and gave me a $5 Dunkin Donuts gift card. Hot. I wrote her off forever. I got that.

[A]

Bye, bye, Rivka.

[B]

I wrote her off forever, so. I'm sorry, Wingstop, you're done. Josh, this is.

[A]

It wasn't cool.

[B]

That's so bad.

[A]

It would have been better had they

[B]

never reached out, done nothing. You don't have to do anything.

[A]

That's right.

[B]

You don't have to do anything.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

We just assume you never saw it. We can just be pure fans. But if you see it and you give a $15 gift card, is this

[A]

a gross segment for me to complain more about freebies we received?

[B]

No, no, no.

[A]

Get ready. Buckle up then.

[B]

No, because I'm sure I have also.

[A]

How often have we talked about our love for Cheesecake Factory on this show?

[B]

A lot. Yeah.

[A]

And your wonderful, beautiful wife, she's also been quite public with her love.

[B]

Loves them.

[A]

Cheesecake Factory. Got my home address. Sent me a little something for the three of us.

[B]

Did you ask for it? No, they just found your home address. Like, through a PR agency or something.

[A]

Something.

[B]

Got it.

[A]

Very nice.

[B]

Is it?

[A]

Well, they sent something for the three of us. Now you're probably saying, well, where's my thing? You know, where's Claudia's thing?

[B]

Oh, the three of us. Me, you and Claudia.

[A]

Me, you and Claudia.

[B]

Got it. They sent it to you in California.

[A]

Lovely little card. We've done a couple big Skinnylicious shout outs.

[B]

Yeah. Which, by the way, Spritz Society. Skinny Spritz should be on the Skinnylicious menu.

[A]

Obviously.

[B]

Just saying. It won't be. That's a make good.

[A]

It won't be.

[B]

Now

[A]

I go, oh, my God, Cheesecake Factory. So they go, thank you for the mentions on the pod. It's National Notebook Day. Did you know? I go, I had no idea.

[B]

They go, who knew? Who the fuck knew?

[A]

What is this? Sponsored by Trapper Keeper?

[B]

National. Nope.

[A]

Book Day. Cool. It's, like, sponsored by the composition book lobby. The fuck? So they sent the three of us, and they're cool notebooks. And would the COVID in the back look like the Cheesecake Factory menu? No gift card.

[B]

Just the book. Just the notebook.

[A]

Just a little spiral notebook.

[B]

You're positive that in the pages, there was no. You, like, shook it?

[A]

Yes.

[B]

You shook it. Nothing.

[A]

I gave it to Max. If you want, I'll send you the other two. I Didn't know if you needed a notebook.

[B]

No.

[A]

It's so nice, but it's just a little misguided.

[B]

No, it's not. It's also. It's not nice. Let me explain. Let me explain why it's not nice.

[A]

It was very nice.

[B]

No, it wasn't.

[A]

And we're giving you even more publicity now because the menu and the restaurant is still top, top, top. The Notebook. Maybe not as good.

[B]

By the way, they're gonna be happy with this. We're talking about Cheesecake Factory.

[A]

Fair enough.

[B]

So they messed up with the Notebook. I've been there three times in the last three months. If me and Claudia are in a car, we're finding a Cheesecake Factory.

[A]

I went for my 39th birthday.

[B]

Do you know how good. This is? Crazy. This is. What are you nuts? For me? Yeah. You know how fucking good the fish is?

[A]

Oh, I haven't.

[B]

Cheesecake Factory.

[A]

It's a scratch kitchen.

[B]

Bet the salmon, it's like this Thai salmon.

[A]

No. Or they give you a miso. The miso salmon. Miso salmon on the nice. Yes. On the rice.

[B]

And they give you a bunch of different sauces.

[A]

Sugar snap peas. This is. This is it.

[B]

Fabulous, fabulous restaurant.

[A]

Yes.

[B]

That said, I'll never have the cheesecake. Cheesecake's delish. It is, but I'll never have it. I haven't. I can't tell you the last time I went to a Cheesecake Factory and ordered cheesecake.

[A]

That's because we're broken, food wise.

[B]

It's too indulgent.

[A]

Yeah. It's like why we never order regular Coke.

[B]

Yeah. Oh, never.

[A]

Yeah. I'm like, what am I, an animal?

[B]

No. If I order a Diet Coke and it tastes like regular Coke, I'm asking you, you sure this is Diet Coke? I'm gonna continue drinking it after you've said yes. But I'm worried.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Because if I have one regular Coke, I'm gonna die. I feel like I'm gonna die. That's being broken, right?

[A]

Yeah. Because you can ingest 3,000 calories of some insane food. But if I have nothing of it.

[B]

If you want a singular regular Coke. I've never in my life had a regular Coke by choice. Wow.

[A]

Interesting.

[B]

I've never had a regular soda by choice ever.

[A]

Wow.

[B]

I've had one Dr. Brown's Black Cherry. Because I thought it was Diet Dr. Brown's. I didn't even know that they made regular Dr. Brown's Black Cherry. I always thought Diet Dr. Brown's was the brand.

[A]

Sure. Who knew?

[B]

Not me. I didn't know.

[A]

Not you.

[B]

I didn't know. This episode of the Good Guys podcast is brought to you by Diamond Crystal Salt. Folks, we've made it. We're promoting salt. You know how much I love salt. I use salt in everything. If your cooking's bad, let me tell you, you're not using enough salt, okay? If your electrolytes feel low, try a pinch of frickin salt, okay? Hey, let me tell you, salt is everything. It's everything to me. It should be everything to you. And diamond crystal kosher salt has been used in professional kitchens and culinary schools for generations. It's the same salt chefs rely on. Now available in sizes designed for everyday home cooks. It's light, flaky texture makes it easier to control how much salt you're using. You can season gradually and evenly, which helps prevent over salting and makes cooking feel more intuitive. The unique hollow flakes cling better to meats, vegetables and other foods, so seasoning stays where you want it and tastes more balanced from the first bite to the last. Diamond crystal kosher salt contains one ingredient. Salt. That's it. No bubkis, no additives, no anti caking agents, none of that crap. It's just the same traditional process. Since 1886, Diamond Crystal Kosher salt has been made in one place, St. Clair, Michigan for 140 years. The same incredible craft process developed in 1886 is the same process they use today. This is part of what makes Diamond Crystal kosher salts so unique, folks. It's the texture, it's the ability to control. You see it, you feel it, you use it, you become one with the salt. Let me tell you, I love salt, okay? And if you don't love salt, you're a bad cook. Sorry. If you're looking for a better way to season and prepare everyday meals, you really need to try Diamond Crystal kosher salt. A chef trusted additive free salt made with light flaky crystals for easy control. Available online and nationwide at your favorite stores like Target, Kroger, Albertsons and more.

[A]

This episode of the Good Guys podcast is sponsored by Zyzol.

[B]

Josh, I'm sorry. Sorry, Josh. Bubby. Yeah, I know it's bad. Oh, over here, man.

[A]

What do you got?

[B]

I think it's just seasonal allergies. It's allergy season. You know, I'm walking around this big beautiful city. I see all of these beautiful trees in bloom. The cherry blossoms, Josh, they're everywhere. They're beautiful, but they're killing me. They're killing me.

[A]

I don't like this. You know, you. Your season is always a good thing for you. You were keto season.

[B]

Yes, right. True. Yes, I was.

[A]

But allergy season, not the best.

[B]

Allergy season is not the best, Josh. And it comes out of nowhere. One minute you're strolling around the neighborhood, walking your dog, having a nice time. The next minute, all of a sudden, you can't. Your throat's itchy, your eyes itchy. I get itches and places, the watery eyes. How'd you know?

[A]

I gotta tell you something, because, you know, your wife is incredible. The great Claudia. But the truth is, she contacted me and she said, I can't live like this anymore. I said, what is it? You know? Really? Wow. You too. Done. She said, never. But she said, I try to sleep at night. He's clearing his throat. Yeah, he's keeping me up. Josh, we need to intervene. I said, claudia, I think we have just the thing for him.

[B]

I can't even defend it. Josh, it's bad. I'm there. It's. There's just this post nasal drip. I can't get rid of it. You're telling me you have a solution?

[A]

I do. And if you just look to your left or right. What's there? What's there? I planted it there from 3,000 miles away.

[B]

Oh, my God.

[A]

This is Zyzal Allergy. 24 hour relieves allergies while you sleep, so you wake refreshed for a productive next day. God. And you know what? The truth is, when you're getting allergy relief from Zyzal, it does start to work in as little as 45 minutes for powerful 24 hour relief. 24 hours. That's a long time.

[B]

24 hours is essential, Josh. You take it right before you go to bed, 45 minutes later. No more. Less throat clearing. Okay, Less throat clearing so my wife doesn't have to be bugged by me. Less watery eyes, less itching, less all of these bad things that seasonal allergies come from. And you wake up the next day, Josh, you know me. I'm running and gunning you. You're running and gunning. We don't have time to think about taking our allergy meds in the morning. No, we take them at night, they last 24 hours, and then the next night, Josh, you do it again. It's called being in a routine. And we're in a routine with Zyzol allergies. 24 hours.

[A]

It's so easy. Because at night is when I take my things. I take my magnesium, I take My zyzole. I take my antipsychotic. Cut that last part out. But at night is when you do your things, you know, in the morning, you're running, you're gunning, you gotta go. Give me my coffee, make Max's lunch. Let's go, let's go. But you're gonna forget. At night is better.

[B]

At night is better.

[A]

Josh, look, here's the truth. You know us good guys, right? And we don't work with anyone. We have been complaining about allergies for an infinity. Yes, right. Maybe at infinitum.

[B]

Yes.

[A]

Okay, but with Zyzyl, you're just going to have less interruptions. Less runny nose, less clearing of your throat, less watery eyes. Tell pollen to take a rest. Who is this big pollen out here doing? Oh, is this, is this, you know, necessary for the blooming of the seasons? I'm not a scientist. What I am is a guy who wants less interruption from these things. So Zyxel is designed to be taken at night, so it's already working in the morning when pollen levels are highest. Look, the truth is, is over the spring and summer, when allergies are really going to get you, whether you're taking a walk with your family, you're. You're at an event outdoors, you want to have a little bit of relief from constantly thinking about your allergy symptoms. Which is why, be wise, all take Zyzol at night. Should we get to one moron mail?

[B]

Yeah, let's do a moron mail. Yeah, guys, the moron mails have been Fantastic. GoodGuys podcast, onemail.com, continue to email us, and we will continue to think about reading yours aloud, even though most of them are absolute drek.

[A]

I'm so ready.

[B]

Okay, more on mail. Gen Z moron here in need of some relationship advice. My fiance is a super handy blue collar worker. Shout out. So for holidays, anniversaries or milestones, he usually hand makes me gifts. I absolutely love them. He's made me jewelry, furniture, cutting boards, et cetera. But there's one thing, they are never ready on time for the actual holiday or event. So he'll usually get me flowers or a small gift and tell me, I'm also making you something, but it's not ready yet. And then I'll get it a few weeks later. Like, yes, I know handmade things take time. Yes, I know he's busy. Yes, I know this is objectively a very sweet problem to have, but also, am I a brat for kind of wanting my gift on the actual event. Sincerely, a maybe bratty fiance. I have a lot of thoughts.

[A]

Yeah. Thought it up.

[B]

If you're gonna make something handmade. Lovely, right? Totally. It's gotta be on time.

[A]

Sure.

[B]

It's more important that you got something on time than it is even what you got. If you're late, it means that you didn't think about them. With enough time to get it done. It means that you were rushed. It means that you were last minute. And you can't give a birthday gift late. I don't care if you made her a hand woven sweater. Which by the way. Gay.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

I don't care. Yeah, no, like go buy something. At what point does it become like cheap?

[A]

I don't think it's.

[B]

Or is it always nice?

[A]

I think it's always nice if you're

[B]

good at it in perpetuity. It's always nice to only make and give handmade things.

[A]

I think it depends on how I think of a. Variety's a spice of life.

[B]

Variety would be wonderful.

[A]

A bit of variance would be good. If he's really good and he's amazing at woodworking and he's like, babe, you're getting a cutting board. But it's gonna be in six to nine months. Cause I gotta seal it. Then you gotta get your shit together. You gotta start earlier.

[B]

Yeah, I think so. Start earlier. That's it. I would love. If he's making cutting boards. I'd love a cutting board.

[A]

Oh, God. Love.

[B]

I'm so jealous of those people. You walk into their house and their island is just a butcher's block. You ever see those? Yes, sure. Where they can just cut right there. That said, must be so smelly. How do you clean that?

[A]

The amount of salmonella in that.

[B]

You can't clean that. No buen. Right? No, it doesn't work. I don't think that works.

[A]

The signs of wealth growing up to me were always. You have an island.

[B]

An island.

[A]

You have ice in the fridge.

[B]

Yeah. Like not in, like a tray.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

An ice machine.

[A]

Yeah, an ice machine in the fridge.

[B]

Correct.

[A]

And you have the instant hot water feature on your faucet.

[B]

I mean, that's your multi millionaire.

[A]

Yeah. You work for NASA.

[B]

No, that was it. Yeah, that was it. Also a. I mean, if you had a refrigerator that somehow blended into your cabinetry. Oh my God.

[A]

It's unreal.

[B]

Unbelievable.

[A]

It's paneled.

[B]

Yeah. Oh, I love that.

[A]

I just love that word. It's going to be paneled.

[B]

Me too. It's fantastic. It's great. A backsplash it's great. You have a backsplash.

[A]

I love it.

[B]

I just have splash of hines. Yeah. On the backsplash.

[A]

Should we get to. What? You nuts?

[B]

You have cutlery that wasn't gifted to you by your great great grandmother during the war? Yeah, Rich.

[A]

My cutlery all has little rust, like. Yeah, it gets a little rust, like little circles.

[B]

Yeah. I don't think they make them the same anymore. That's why my parents. Seriously?

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

They have 100-year-old cutlery. All of it is stainless steel. From my great great grandmother or something.

[A]

From where in Hungary?

[B]

I don't know. Literally. I think they literally. This is like their precious jewels is this old cutlery. And it looks better than my new stuff.

[A]

Sounds like where we're from. Hungary.

[B]

I'm Hungary. I'm Hungary. Starving.

[A]

That's real. That'd be our country.

[B]

Hungary.

[A]

Hungary.

[B]

Israel.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Hungary is real.

[A]

Hungary is real. Who would be the prime minister? Ooh.

[B]

If Hungary is real. Kelly. Kelly Clarkson or the Rizzler. Hungary.

[A]

The king and queen.

[B]

That's so good.

[A]

Oh, that would be so good.

[B]

Imagine that in 10 years, Kelly Clarkson marries the Rizzler because she's recently divorced, right? Yeah. And he, in eight to nine years will be eligible.

[A]

Sometimes women in their 40s do get like, you know, a little bit of like Stella got her groove back. Like they want like a young, hot thing.

[B]

They'll want a hot, young 20 year old. Riz.

[A]

And that's Riz.

[B]

That's the Rizzler. What a guy.

[A]

Oh, my God. Wow. I just. I hope for young Rizzler that when he's at, you know, whatever college he attends. Harvard, Baruch. He seems like he'll probably go to Weston.

[B]

Fiu.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Yeah. Fiu.

[A]

Sarah Lawrence. I hope that he's not walking the halls of his school and everyone's calling him Rizzler and he doesn't hate it.

[B]

I hope he loves it.

[A]

I hope he loves it.

[B]

I hope he loves it too.

[A]

Because that's the fine line that you're dealing with with any kid actor is like, you just. You don't know if it's the thing that will follow them forever.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

And if they'll still want it when they're a big grown adult.

[B]

Yeah. It's hard.

[A]

It's a really hard balance.

[B]

Do you want it?

[A]

Me?

[B]

You?

[A]

I mean, yeah. It's been a part of my life forever. I've talked about this so many times before. I feel so lucky that I don't have a nickname.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Of course, our names were Our names.

[B]

Thank God. Oh my God, Thank God. What a nightmare.

[A]

Except the other day like this.

[B]

Because then it really would feel like you can't ever escape it.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

If somebody was just calling you Dan.

[A]

Oh, yeah. Or Screech. Oh my God.

[B]

Terrible.

[A]

Can't get away from it.

[B]

Screech.

[A]

Dude, I think they put him in an early grave.

[B]

Wow.

[A]

RIP Screech. Poor Dustin Diamond.

[B]

Except horrible name. Wait, Screech is dead?

[A]

He sadly passed.

[B]

Really?

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Wow.

[A]

Yeah. Dustin Diamond. Dustin diamond had a terrible. Do you know anything about Dustin Diamond?

[B]

Nothing other than Screech.

[A]

We could talk about him on the pod since sadly he's not here anymore. But I believe he had an adult film career for a second.

[B]

Really?

[A]

So there was a bit of that. And then I think he stabbed someone at a bar. Wow. Because someone tried to stab him and then he died of cancer.

[B]

Oh my God.

[A]

Let's see. I want to make sure I'm speaking correctly.

[B]

That's terrible. I'm so sorry, Screech. Rest in peace, Screech. I guess that's the. The title of the episode. Oh, I just found out Screech died. That's so me.

[A]

Where you been, Ben?

[B]

Who knows where I've been?

[A]

Let's see. What. Yeah, I said Dustin Diamond. Did he do porn? And stab? Best known for playing Screech on Saved by the bell. In 2006, a sex tape titled Screeched Saved by the Smell was released. Oh. Diamond later claimed that parts of it used to body double and that he was trying to make money and stay relevant during a rough career period. Been there. Stabbing incident. Screech.

[B]

Saved by the Smell is honestly iconic.

[A]

It's kind of it.

[B]

That's iconic.

[A]

Stabbing incident. Yes. In 2014, diamond was involved in an altercation at a bar in Wisconsin where a man was stabbed during a fight. Diamond admitted he had a knife and claimed he was defending himself and his fiance during a chaotic confrontation.

[B]

Whoa. You know, rest in peace, Screech.

[A]

We look at people come off of sitcoms and we think they're like, you know, oh my God, Lisa Kudrow, you know, Matt LeBlanc, Julia Louise Dreyfus. We forget about the Screeches. We forget about the Screeches and the Michael Richards.

[B]

We also forget that these people are still people. And just cause everything seems rosy from the outside doesn't mean they're not battling something from the inside. And anybody that ever wants to trade places with someone. The grass isn't always greener. No, it's not.

[A]

There might not even be grass.

[B]

There Might be nothing. It might be rubble.

[A]

It's a dirt patch.

[B]

Yeah, rubble bad.

[A]

Did you hear the joke on the Kevin Hart roast where.

[B]

Oh, by the way, I went back and watched like a little. It was funny.

[A]

There's some funny stuff.

[B]

There's some funny stuff.

[A]

I think Tony Hinchcliffe said to Pete Davidson.

[B]

He goes, he's insane. And I appreciate how far he'll push.

[A]

He's nuts. He looks like he's been eating butter because his teeth are crazy.

[B]

They're crazy. They're crazy teeth.

[A]

But it's funny. I think he said something to beat Davidson to the effect of like, you were horrible on snl. No one can name a single sketch you've done. Your father is rolling around in this rubble right now. I was like, who? Oh, my God.

[B]

Yeah, he is. He goes really, really, really hard. Really hard. Too hard sometimes too hard. He crosses that line. He definitely is.

[A]

It's too much.

[B]

It's too much. But it does at least protect comedy a little. Because then you can point to that guy and say, that's too much. And all of a sudden the line's being moved.

[A]

Right.

[B]

You know, that's too much. But if we joke and say something, we're not getting canceled for it because he's moved the line.

[A]

Sure.

[B]

Which I appreciate. But what are you, nuts?

[A]

What are you nuts?

[B]

Our what are you nuts? Moment of the week is our gripes with people, places and things both big and tall. Whatever's sticking in your craw. For me, sometimes it's old, Josh. I was driving my car and I noticed an 80 year old man on a city bike. At least 80. And if you can ride a bike, power to you. This man can't ride a bike.

[A]

Sure.

[B]

He's swerving, going back and forth. He's dead. He's definitely dead. I saw him this morning and he's dead this afternoon. There's no question, I think, that Citi Bike, and I'm sure that you guys have a version of Citi Bike in Los Angeles. These rentable bikes give a little bit too much confidence to those that actually shouldn't be riding bikes. They shouldn't be riding bikes in a park, let alone on the city streets of New York. Just because you can rent it doesn't mean you should, Josh. If you can't. If you're not passionate enough about bike riding to want to own one, I really don't think you should be able to ride it on the streets of New York City. I don't know how many accidents they occur, but I looked at this 80 year old man, I'm like, oh, my God, I'm paying attention to him. But if I wasn't, God forbid, I was texting. He's dead, right? Because he's swerving. You're in a bike lane and he's in my lane. And then he's back in the bike lane and he's in my lane. He does not know how to ride a bike. Or he doesn't have the ability anymore.

[A]

Fortitude. Yeah.

[B]

What are you, nuts?

[A]

Nuts.

[B]

Citibike shouldn't be renting to people who can't ride bikes.

[A]

Totally agree. My. What are you nuts? Is on my plane here last night from LAX to Newark, New Jersey. I ran into a guy who I know sort of lightly, but we. We haven't met in person, but we follow each other on social media. He goes, hey, man, great to see you. I go, great to see you. He said, where you headed? New York. I go, yeah, we're on the same plane, guy. What are you nuts? Germany.

[B]

I guess you could add a layover. But where are you going? He assumed that you were going to Morocco. Yeah, I'm like, like you're flying to New York to then have stuffed America. That's funny. Where was he going? New York.

[A]

Yeah. Yeah, we're going to the same place. Same, same.

[B]

That's hilarious.

[A]

Not connecting now.

[B]

Sometimes people just don't know what to say, so they just say things I

[A]

do all the time.

[B]

Me too. Yeah, me too.

[A]

Take us home.

[B]

I was gonna say. You know what else I say, Josh? That this episode's five stars. Otherwise, what are you, nuts? Honestly, my. What are you nuts? Is anybody that leaves a two star review for anything? It's not us. No, I'm just saying in general. I'll go on Target's website. I'll look at Spritz Society. Somebody left two stars. Just send me a dm. See, you hate me and Jews. You don't have to leave it on the Target website.

[A]

So true.

[B]

What are you, nuts? Listen to us. Wherever you get your podcasts, watch us on Spotify, okay? Spotify? Yeah. This is sick, Josh. Spotify video. You'll love it. Watch it. Listen to it. Watch it. Listen to it. Also on Josh's YouTube Mondays and Thursdays, folks. We will see you next time.