Khakis, Granola & Other Poor Choices

Summary

Good Guys Podcast: Khakis, Granola & Other Poor Choices

Date: September 4, 2025
Hosts: Josh Peck & Ben Soffer

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Overview

This episode is a classic blend of humor, cultural commentary, and personal anecdotes from Josh and Ben. The main theme centers on lifestyle choices, from fashion and parenting to real estate dreams and the quirks of modern life, all delivered in the duo’s signature self-deprecating, observational style. The episode weaves through discussions on wearing women’s clothes, the challenges and privileges of living in major cities, political scuttlebutt, fall coffee menus, and listener dilemmas ranging from new parent struggles to granola company branding.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

Fashion Choices & Gender Bending (00:37–05:54)

• Ben reveals he’s wearing his wife Claudia’s sweatshirt and discusses his tendency to steal her socks, even though they don't fit. Socks seem to vanish, leaving him perpetually borrowing from her collection.
  • “Somehow she always has socks and she wears those, like, mid ankle socks... I’m wearing her socks right now.” – Ben (02:07)
• Both hosts joke about wearing women's clothing and the comfort in "oversized" women's styles, referencing cultural icons like Ina Garten.
  • “Ina is the goal, right? Because she’s basically wearing tarps.” – Josh (04:59)
• Josh recounts making social media videos in a women’s thong, humorously reflecting on the sense of feeling “beautiful,” and Ben admits thriving in large, drapey women's clothes, particularly for costume or comedic effect.

Celebrity Anecdotes & Tipping Habits (05:54–08:33)

• Josh shares stories about hairdressers who work with famous “bobs” such as Ina Garten and Anna Wintour.
  • “She tips her with a crisp $50 bill every time.” – Josh (07:12)
• Ben suggests tipping in gold bullion and muses on Florida legalizing gold as currency: “We should start tipping in bullion.” (08:28)

Real Estate & Parenting: City vs. Suburb Life (11:20–19:24)

• Ben discusses anxiety about moving back to NYC with a newborn after a peaceful stay in the suburban Hamptons.
  • “I am nervous about the city walks because… the city is significantly less safe than it’s been, and walking around with a three month old is significantly less enjoyable...” – Ben (11:52)
• Josh pitches an “ideal schedule” of rotating between NYC, the Hamptons, and Florida, maximizing weather and comfort. They both reflect on the “privilege” of these choices but frame them as attainable, not just luxury.
• Both host a lively dream-real-estate chat—citing LA’s proximity to both beach and countryside, the value of having a house nearby for quick escapes, and the differences in affordability between major metro areas and just-outside suburbs.

Politics, Public Figures & Social Media Strategies (19:24–32:27)

• Brief discourse on “derangement syndromes” regarding Trump, Hillary, and Kamala, critiquing extreme fandom or opposition.
  • “People need to stop blindly hating and loving people. It’s not cool. No matter who it is, you need to be informed...” – Ben (32:03)
• Discussion about Spencer Pratt’s transformation into a political activist against local California officials, citing possible government negligence around recent disasters.
  • “He’s made it his life mission to take these people down.” – Ben (21:24)
• Josh describes encountering Spencer Pratt at Monster Jam, and both reflect on the difference between viral fame and true financial security.
• Commentary on government response to natural disasters and the political polarization of such responses, especially in California:
  • “It should be a moment to galvanize and not to be like, let’s dunk on the other side and their tragedy that they’re enduring.” – Josh (28:59)
• Ben draws parallels to why the media hyper-focuses on certain kinds of disasters or conflicts, notably California wildfires and Israel.
  • “Why do we only talk about California when it comes to a natural disaster? And why do we only talk about Israel when it comes to a war? So Jews.” – Ben (29:58)
• Fun moment: Josh reads Gavin Newsom’s Trump-style tweets out loud, both marveling at and lampooning the strategy (30:17–31:29).

Fall Coffee Menus & Birthday Snafus (35:57–41:19)

• The hosts discuss new and returning fall drinks at Dunkin', Starbucks, and Tim Hortons, debating the merits and health perils of sugary lattes and pumpkin-flavored treats.
  • “Cereal and milk latte – I would definitely try that.” – Josh (36:30)
• Producer Olivia’s birthday is revealed (26), leading to playful ribbing about remembering (or forgetting) birthdays and whether $200 is an appropriate gift.
  • “Do you want stone? Hold on... 200, that’s nice, right?” – Josh (38:33)
• Commentary on regional differences in coffee shop offerings, the sadness of some “franchise-dunkin’s,” Blank Street Coffee’s rise in NYC, and Starbucks loyalty.

News Oddities & Ridiculous Headlines (45:23–48:30)

• Ben jokes about a viral tabloid story: “Man with world’s largest penis slips, breaks arm in shower.”
  • Both riff on the practical challenges such…endowments might present.
  • “He also reported his own wang to the Guinness Book of World Records. Like, how do they know?...He’s like, hey, look at me and my khakis.” – Ben (47:13)
• The story leads to extended, juvenile banter about khakis as “big wang highlighter,” and whether penile reduction should be considered analogous to breast reductions.

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Listener Questions & Advice (Speakpipe Q&A) (48:33–59:08)

1. Living with Your Mother-in-Law as New Parents (49:29–51:42)

• Caller is conflicted about temporarily staying with mother-in-law after being forced to move while expecting a baby.
  • Both hosts agree: take the help, set boundaries, treat it as temporary.
  • “You'll be so thankful,” – Josh (51:21)

2. Divorced Parents & Grandkid’s Parties (51:54–57:58)

• Listener laments having to orchestrate split family gatherings because divorced dad refuses to attend joint events.
  • Ben: It’s about the grandchild, not the parents—feels they should set aside differences.
  • Josh: Empathizes, but ultimately says the listener can’t expect people to behave differently—they need to make peace with it.
  • “You live in the world that is, not the world we wish we lived in.” – Josh (58:05)

3. Granola Branding Dilemma (59:15–61:05)

• Entrepreneur asks for advice on renaming her granola brand: “Slow Street” vs “Park Day.”
  • Ben: “Short and distinct is all that matters; Slow Street is fine.”
  • Josh jokes: “Sounds like an episode of Sesame Street for kids with special needs!”

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Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• “What ladies clothes do I enjoy wearing? I exclusively wear my wife's socks.” – Ben (01:59)
• “I thrive in oversized women’s clothing. How easy is that?” – Ben (04:43)
• “She tips her with a crisp $50 bill every time.” – Josh, on Anna Wintour (07:12)
• “We should start tipping in bullion.” – Ben, on what’s next for gratuities (08:28)
• “If you had like a boatload of money...the real hack of life is...an hour away, you had the polar opposite [of your main home].” – Josh (16:14)
• “People need to stop blindly hating and loving people. Yeah, it’s not cool.” – Ben (32:03)
• “You could bring it to the beach, but that’s not…that’s nice.” – Ben, on a Dunkin’ menu gimmick (40:07)
• “Do you want stone?” – Josh, on birthday gifts (38:30)
• “He also reported his own wang to the Guinness Book of World Records…” – Ben, still processing the bizarre headline (47:13)
• “Elmo Road, the small bus, today. Little busy.” – Ben (61:05)
• “What are you, nuts?” – Recurring tagline/segment.

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Timestamps for Key Segments

• 00:37–05:54 | Women's clothing, fashion comfort, and Ina Garten talk.
• 05:54–08:33 | Celebrity hairdressers and tipping stories.
• 11:20–19:24 | Parenting in city vs. suburb, dreaming up the ideal home schedule.
• 19:24–32:27 | Political flame wars, Spencer Pratt’s activism, disaster relief debate.
• 35:57–41:19 | Fall coffee menus, producer Olivia’s birthday.
• 45:23–48:30 | Viral headline: world’s largest penis mishap.
• 48:33–59:08 | Speakpipe listener questions.
• 61:34–63:40 | “What Are You Nuts?”: Airplane air conditioning rant.

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Original Tone & Language Summary

The hosts’ exchanges are fast-paced, self-aware, irreverent, and loaded with sarcasm. They riff on serious topics (like disaster relief and the emotional fallout of divorce) with empathy but never lose sight of the playful “what are you, nuts?” perspective that defines their brand. Quotables, pop culture references, and personal stories make for a highly relatable and comedic experience.

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For longtime fans, this episode delivers the classic blend of banter, neuroses, and real-world advice, while newcomers will find plenty of laughs and a few genuine takeaways about life’s daily dilemmas.

Transcript

[A]

The following podcast is a dear media production. Two Jews, both big and tall. No subject too small for the Good Guys. A mother's dream premium podcast team. Make it your weekly routine. It's a Good Guys.

[B]

And if you don't give us five stars.

[A]

What are you nuts?

[B]

What are you nuts?

[A]

Yeah, we're the good guys. They're not the great guys. We're just the good of the good guys. Mazo. Morons. Welcome back to the Good Guys podcast. Ben, how are you?

[B]

I'm wonderful. Can you tell that I'm wearing Claudia's sweatshirt? How are you?

[A]

That's Claude's sweatshirt. Huh?

[B]

It is. It is. It is. This is a women's sweatshirt. What's it say on says Los Angeles established 2002. Rag and Bone.

[A]

Okay. I knew that it had to be some high end couture because at first, from this far away, it looks like she bought it at Venice Be.

[B]

Yeah, this is Josh. This is short on the sleeves. This is short on the waist. Short over here. Can you see how it comes up to here? It's short. Too short. But I woke up this morning, Josh, and I don't know if the same thing happened in Los Angeles. New York decided it's not summer anymore. It's fall and it's cold. Significantly colder. We've been cruising mid-80s, mid-90s. This morning it was like 64, which when you're accustomed to 80s, 90s, even for me, that's chilly. So I threw. I think this is the first time I've ever worn a sweatshirt on the podcast. Except for, of course, last episode, but this is the first time.

[A]

Do you. Are there any ladies clothes that you enjoy wearing?

[B]

Underwear?

[A]

So say more bras.

[B]

No. What ladies clothes do I enjoy wearing? I exclusively wear my wife's socks.

[A]

They fit you?

[B]

No, no, they don't. They don't. But we, we've at this point, I probably have two, three pairs of socks. I don't know where my socks go. Okay, I buy a 12 pack. I'm down to one. Yeah, I buy a 12 pack, I'm down to one. Somehow she always has socks and she wears those, like mid ankle socks. I'm wearing her socks right now. I guess they'd be higher up on her thigh, but for me they just, they end up being short on the ankle. These are her. These are her socks. They look pretty good, right? Hang on this stupid cord. They look pretty good.

[A]

They look good. They look like you're about to teach an aerobics class in 1987.

[B]

That's me?

[A]

Aerobics Joe, did you know that for most of the time that Richard Simmons was alive until he walked away and said no more, that he had a fitness studio in Beverly Hills called Slimmins and you could go and do a group aerobics class with him every day at noon.

[B]

Slimmins.

[A]

Slimmins.

[B]

Hun God, what I would do. What I would do for a Slimmins. Fuck. Now we can't even talk about people being skinny. Everybody's on Ozempic. We can't even talk about people being skinny. We can't. I want something called Slimmins.

[A]

How sick would it be if you and I had a good guys studio right in the heart of New York City where you could just come in, listen to 90 Hip Hop with a side of meatloaf. The singer, not the food. You fatties.

[B]

And you come in and you come dance.

[A]

Just dance. Dance party for an hour.

[B]

We still need to launch my dinner party series called Meatloaf where you only listen to meatloaf and you only eat meatloaf. Okay. I think this should be a big hit.

[A]

A big hit before I. This is a good transition, but I don't want to get away from ladies clothes yet because I've done some pretty hilarious social media videos while wearing a woman's thong. And it is. How do I say this? It doesn't ignite anything in me that wants to cross dress. But it was the moment that I put the thong on. I could appreciate feeling beautiful. Does that make sense?

[B]

It does. Was it very uncomfortable though?

[A]

No, surprisingly not.

[B]

So you don't feel that string just up your ass?

[A]

No, it was kind of just like. I mean, granted, I didn't get like straight fati on a line. Like I got. I just found an extra large thong at Target because I didn't want to do it to be. I think Paige was more upset that I was seen at Target buying a woman's thong than just taking one of her.

[B]

God, oh my God. I would be too. And an xl.

[A]

I picked up a thong in case of Spritz Society.

[B]

Both available at Target. Oh, man. I've dressed like a woman before Halloween. Mostly when I dressed up like Ina Garten for a video. I'm not gonna lie, Josh. I thrive in oversized women's clothing. How easy is that?

[A]

Well, Ina is the goal, right? Because she's basically wearing tarps.

[B]

She is. She is. These are huge blue oversized button downs.

[A]

That are worn open and her hair is termites.

[B]

Oh my God. They're just fumigating under the shirt. It's Funny.

[A]

And we could say that because she is the richest, most wonderful person there is. She's. She's one at life.

[B]

She's. She's my absolute favorite. It doesn't mean that she doesn't wear oversized clothes. Two things can be true. She can be the best, and she can wear oversized clothes. I could benefit from wearing oversized clothes far too often. Am I wearing something that is just a little bit too tight, Josh? Just a little too tight.

[A]

You know, I am close with two hairdressers who have both worked on two of the most famous bobs in all of history. My one friend, Sharon, dear family friend, true Israeli kid, but, like, you know, the greatest. Has lived in LA for 30 years and basically still has the thickest accent you've ever heard. Okay? And he goes one day, he says, he goes, you know this woman, Ina Garten? I go, do I know Ina Garten? What are you talking about? He goes, you're not going to believe for years this woman, she called me. I come to her hotel every morning. I give her hair blowout. She reads book. Very pleasant, but reads book while I do it. And she pays me nicely. I do it for entire time she's here, three times a year. I go, you've been doing Ina's blowout in her hotel room for, wow. For like a decade.

[B]

Okay, wow. Wow.

[A]

And then my friend has done Anna Wintour, not Sharon. Another friend has done Anna Wintour's blowout whenever she's in la. And she gets a blowout every single morning while she's here, probably every day of her life. And she said that she tips her with a crisp $50 bill every time.

[B]

So, Josh, how do you have such a network of hairstylists that you call friends? Where did you meet them? Were they. Would you meet them on set? Did you just keep them, Keep in touch with them? Do you get blowouts?

[A]

No. I mean, they do men's cuts, too.

[B]

Got it. Yeah, got it. They also do men's cuts. Okay. Wow. I mean, a nice crisp 50. I'm not going to lie. Anna, you can do 100.

[A]

Okay, well, she's paying her, too.

[B]

I know she can do 100. If she's doing cash, she's got to do the largest bill.

[A]

But there's something. But a 50 is not highly circulated.

[B]

You know, that's true. It is almost. Almost like a 2. It's not a 2, but it's almost like a 2.

[A]

Right.

[B]

Where you might appreciate the 2 as much as you'd appreciate the 5. Maybe that's what she's thinking that by giving you the crisp 50, if it's truly crisp, it feels similar to 100. I feel that. I hear that. I do.

[A]

Could you imagine if you tipped in a small sack of John F. Kennedy half dollars? But there's a lot, right? So you're not cheaping out, but it's like you're handing someone a little, like, pouch of magical beans.

[B]

You know, I want, I want to start carrying around gold. We should start tipping in bullion.

[A]

Tipping in bullion. Title in gold.

[B]

In gold. I'm in. I'm in. I forget what state they just legalized gold as. Like, you can use it anywhere. And all the comments were like, okay, so I'm gonna go into shoprite and give them a gold coin. How are they gonna know how much it's worth? If it's real, how are they gonna give me back my money? I feel like it was Florida. It makes sense that it was Florida, but gold was legalized as legal tender or something. And it's like, I'm in. If I can just have like a little bean, like a sack of beans, and each bean is like, I don't know, 200 bucks in gold, I'm in. Right? That sounds fun. Easily. It's something I could easily lose. This episode of the Good Guys podcast is brought to you by our friends at Caraway. Folks, you know we love caraway here at the Good Guys podcast. We always talk about how gorgeous their pans are. But let me tell you something, okay? Did you know that years ago, the founder Jordan accidentally overheated a non stick ptfe, AKA Teflon coated pan and got sick with the Teflon flu. It was black and fuming. The Teflon flu. What is this, Medieval times? And after looking into the problem, he found that it only took 2 1/2 minutes for Teflon coated pants to heat to 500 degrees and begin releasing toxic chemicals into the air? Toxic chemicals. We don't need this. We need caraway. Folks, I know that you love caraway. You probably have already bought their iconic kitchenware set. They're iconic pans. They're gorgeous. You know, I have the seafoam green. I love them. But maybe, folks, maybe today you need maybe their prep and board set, okay? Which comes with knives, shears, FSC certified birch wooden utensils, boards, and storage organizers. Or maybe their bakeware set, which includes 11 pieces, all featuring a toxic free ceramic surface. Sets include storage organizers to keep your kitchen tidy. And when you buy the Bakeware set, you'll save 200 versus buying them individually. I love everything from Caraway because not only do the pans work great, but I don't have to be worried about getting the Teflon flu. The Teflon flu. That's the ultimate. What are you nuts? Did you know the average adult unknowingly consumes over 150,000 plastic particles every year? Over 70% of cooking and baking pans sold in the US are coated with PTFE. And microwaving plastic for three minutes can release over 4 million microplastics. What are you nuts? So folks, you know Caraway's cookware set is famous for a reason. It can save you up to $190 versus buying the items individually. Plus, if you visit carawayhome.com good10 you can take another 10% off your next purchase. This deal is exclusive for our listeners, so visit carawayhome.com good10 or use code good10 at checkout. Caraway Non Toxic Cookware Made Modern So.

[A]

Be honest because I'm sure you're excited to get home and back to your beloved city and just being in your own home with the beautiful Ruby and Claudia. But is there a little part of you that's a little anticipatory or nervous because you've had the baby in the perfect suburban setting, Right. Which is indicative and conducive to having a kid just because there's plenty of room with the car and the loading with the car seat and easy parking for all your stores and stuff. Are you a little nervous about, you know, reconfiguring back in the city?

[B]

Yeah, I would. For those of you that don't know, I've been sharing a house with my wife, her sister and their kids and we're in a house in the Hamptons, very suburban. Ruby goes out every day on walks. He gets straight in the car in his duna. We go to restaurants, we go to the beach. I would say that I have about as conducive a setup in New York as one can have. My garage is right across the street so I can pull the car around, he can get in the duna and we can go somewhere. I am nervous about the city walks because even though we heavily debate this, I do feel the city is significantly less safe than it's been and walking around with a three month old is significantly less enjoyable than it is walking around outdoors in the Hamptons, you know, or really in any suburban town. I think we're just going to have to do a lot of central Park. I love Central park in the fall. It's probably my favorite time of year. When the temperature is 60 degrees, you're wearing maybe a sweater, like, I'm excited for that. It's more work, for sure. The pros, though, outweigh the cons. Like to get back to what we call our bubble, like the three of us. I'm very excited. I think it will be great. And. Yeah. But, yeah, it'll be an adjust. There will be an adjustment. And whenever I'm in a house, I always think I'd thrive in a house. I love a house.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Like, there's so much space. Yeah.

[A]

Okay, so let me pitch. The problem is, once Ruby has school, it's going to be a different story. But let me pitch this because I think it might be the perfect living schedule for the Safarashtri clan.

[B]

Tell me.

[A]

So you're in New York April 1st to June 1st.

[B]

Perfect.

[A]

You get to enjoy that beautiful spring weather right before it turns. Right before. Right before. Maybe April 15th to June 15th. Then time for the Hamptons. Let's go spend $2,000 at Surf Lodge. Hamptons. Hamptons. Hamptons finance, bro. Douchebags and shorts. Okay, so you go to the Hamptons now. Right. And you're there June 15th to August 15th. Right.

[B]

Beautiful.

[A]

Then you go back to the city. You go back now it's fall. You're in Central Park. You're with the beautiful roofing. It's a. It's a balmy 55 degree day. Sarah Jessica Parker's walking around masquerading like she's actually in love with Matthew Broderick, Even though we know that can't be okay. It's beautiful. Right?

[B]

It can't be true. It can't be true. No. No.

[A]

And so you're back in the city. It's fall. You're having the best time. But then. And you know that day. And it's either a week before Halloween or a week after.

[B]

Yes.

[A]

One strong gust of wind comes and you go, I can't live here anymore.

[B]

Yes. And then November 15th. Yeah. We say it on three. One, two, three. Florida.

[A]

Florida. That's it.

[B]

Yes.

[A]

November 15th to March 15th. You're in South Florida. Have I just cracked the code?

[B]

Yes. This. This is. This is the. That would be the ultimate luxury if that could happen. The ultimate luxury.

[A]

Well, it.

[B]

Definitely. Absolutely.

[A]

And not. Not just because you and your wife do well, which is amazing. But, like, it's within. It's certainly within reason. Like, it's not. It's not a crazy luxury.

[B]

No, it's a thousand percent within reason. I didn't mean luxury from a price perspective. I meant just, like, to have the perfect life with perfect weather. Like that is. It's. I meant more that it's like a luxury to do that. And, yeah, it makes a lot of sense. The only thing that you run into is school. So it's perfect until he goes to school and then.

[A]

But you're good. You're good till school, right? Because he can go to preschool in Florida for half the preschool. Don't matter. He won't.

[B]

It doesn't matter. Good. For five years. You've cracked the code for five years. You've cracked the code for five years, which, honestly, sounds great. I'm in. I heard it. I already go to Florida, Like, December, January. Anyways, this is the move. Josh, you want to come with me? Crack the code. You come to Florida. November to March, we'll be bi. Coastal.

[A]

I don't know. You know, I. I always think about this, and granted, this is, like, the most privileged conversation one could have, but I think about, like, what if you had, like, a boatload of money? What, like, the real hack of life is. And here's what I think. Bert Kreischer has this. He has a beautiful house in the Valley where he raises kids in, like, a perfect area. Lovely. But it's the Valley, right? I grew up in the Valley. It's just like proper suburbia. Close to work, close to everything. And he has a gorgeous beach house. But in la, you can have a beach house an hour away. Right. Like, I think the key. Like, Paige and I talk about, we live by the beach and we love it. And we have, like, a smaller house and no land, because it's just. That's what you get by the beach. But we talk about, like, what if one hour away, we had the polar opposite, which was something a little bit more in the country, a little bit more removed, but an hour away, you're going to use it. Whereas if it's two hours away or in another state, then it's a whole thing.

[B]

I love that. What you're describing is what. Yeah, that's what New Yorkers do with, like, Atlantic Beach. Atlantic beach is our version of that. It's not the nicest beach. The difference with you guys is you have beautiful, perfect beaches that are an hour away. Right. So I don't know why you don't do that. But New Yorkers will have an apartment in the city, and then if they're able, like, a house in Atlantic Beach, 40 minutes, 45 minutes. Not the best beach, but it's still a beach. And this affords you both lives. I think for you, if you moved. I love that for you. I love, I love that for you. Would you still have something on the beach? Or you just travel to the beach, but you love walking by the beach. It's also so gorgeous where you live. Like, the temperature is so perfect because you're there. You might get hot if you're inland, but couldn't you live like, near a lake?

[A]

It's. No, it's perfect. Like, no, we will never get rid of the house that we have now. And my son goes to, to school. Like, we're very rooted there. But I think if we had the ability in which. Because that's what's great about la, right? Like, you can live in West Hollywood and an hour away is Malibu or Hidden Hills, Calabasas, Westlake, like, or if you're more south, you have like Palace Verdes and all these places that you could have. Like, and by the way, in most of these places, like, the houses are cheaper and you can get more land, even though they sound very rich and fabulous, are actually more reasonable, way cheaper.

[B]

It's. It's not exactly like this, but like, you go to upstate New York, it's beautiful, and you can get a fucking mansion. Like, literally, like the Chappaqua. Two million bucks in New York gets you dog shit.

[A]

A one bedroom plus a den.

[B]

Literally nothing. You put that 2 million bucks an hour North Chappaqua, you can go to.

[A]

Starbucks with the Clintons.

[B]

6,500 square feet a pool. Like, it's. It's crazy and you can breathe and you're not paying city tax. What are we doing?

[A]

Okay, can I ask you this? And. Because I think we'll have the perfect take on this, and I don't think I have this about our good old friend Donnie T. You know, there's a little part of him that I just love. Love, love, love, love. But I didn't vote for the guy. Not a big fan. But I think as much as there is Trump derangement syndrome on the left, and there is. I am not defending that. I've seen some people that are absolutely cuckoo about that. I think there is some real Hillary derangement syndrome on the right. And I'm looking and I just can't. She just seems awesome and I just can't. The amount of hate, I've never seen this.

[B]

She's also just like, not like, she's not relevant anymore. So give it a rest.

[A]

Right.

[B]

I agree with you. I totally agree with you. It's the same thing on both sides. A thousand percent. We love that. It's also. I would say it's Kamala derangement syndrome. But her. With this book. Can you stop it? With this book.

[A]

Tell me what's going on.

[B]

She's writing a book. 107 days. Maybe it's just because I follow her on Instagram. All I see, book, book, book, book, book, book, book. We get it. You're trying to make your whatever you're trying to earn out of whatever monster Simon Schuster gave you.

[A]

We get.

[B]

We get it. But she's also out of it. I don't want to hear about you anymore. It's done. You're done. It was even that thing with California. Didn't she come out and say, I'm not running for governor of California? And everybody was like, when were you. Like, I didn't hear that. You were. You just told me you weren't. Did you hear that, too?

[A]

I did. Yeah. Well, and she also just said politics in general are broken, which she might have a point, but, yeah, there's no move for her to keep. She did her thing. Like, I actually think if she is able to ride off into the sunset and do something, like, kind of cool, but away from politics, it will serve her much better.

[B]

I completely agree. I completely agree. Yeah. The book is. The book is a good final chapter. Can we talk at all about Spencer Pratt, or do you not want to?

[A]

Sure. I don't know anything. So tell me.

[B]

Oh, my God. Spencer Pratt has turned his entire Instagram Josh into a. Anti Karen Bass, anti Gavin Newsom, pointing out like that, like, she fired the people who were supposed to clear the brush. He's, like, talking to, like, the CIA. He's turned, like, he's made it his life mission to take these people down. I'm shocked that you haven't seen this. It's his new Heidi Montag. Remember when he was like, I'm gonna make my wife the most famous pop singer in the world? That was his thing. This is now his thing. Are you looking at his Instagram account?

[A]

You should. Yeah, I'm trying to look at that. And I'm also trying to look at all these Gavin Newsom tweets that he's been doing in the voice of Trump, which have been pretty good.

[B]

I haven't. I haven't seen them.

[A]

Okay. I'm going to. I'm going to try to find them, but I. Yeah, you know what? I'll tell you this. And I don't think this is a completely honest story and I don't think I'm speaking out of school here if I share what he said. So I ran into him and his wife. They were taking their kids. As I was taking my kids to.

[B]

Monster Jam, ran into Spencer.

[A]

Spencer and Heidi at Monster Jam at Sofi. Fucking rad, bro.

[B]

Sick.

[A]

Out there in the grave digger doing wheelies. Sick. And so we're there with our kids and we see each other. And I had posted dancing to Heidi song and support and whatnot. So I don't know if we had ever met, but maybe he was aware of me. He reposted. So I see him and I like, walk up and I was a little bit like, I think just tone deaf or enough time had passed where we're chatting for a minute and I go, dude, congratulations on what you've done. Like, just like turning this, you know, incredibly difficult thing into like, a real win for him and his family in the sense of relevancy. And I'm sure, like, you know, deals and all these things. And he goes, yeah, bro, but I still don't have a house and my parents don't have a house. Like, And I was sort of shocked back in the reality of, like, oh, yeah. Like, so it made me realize, like, even though they have had this great wave of support and really capitalizing on all this, like, they really did go through a terribly traumatic thing.

[B]

Terrible. And it makes sense why he's made it his life's mission to take down the people that he thinks are responsible. It's just very interesting. Like, I can't escape it. Maybe it's because I engaged with it once, or maybe it's because I like to poke fun at Karen Bass. But it's all. It's like, it's like receipts of like. I don't know. I don't know if it's conspiracy theories or what it is, but he's putting together quite the compelling case that there's some negligence.

[A]

What do you think?

[B]

I don't know. I'm not informed enough.

[A]

Like detectives over here.

[B]

I certainly. Big brains. I certainly hope that, like, the things that I've read are that they just zoned. They just zoned like a very significant part of the homes that were burned to the ground, all for low income housing. I don't know if you saw this, okay, that. That people perhaps didn't want to rebuild, couldn't afford to rebuild, whatever it may be. Those homes are no longer going to exist. And all of a sudden they're just low income housing and homeless housing. I don't know, like, shouldn't those people get their homes back? There's. I don't want to get into conspiracy theory land because I definitely don't ever want to think that a politician would intentionally let a city burn ablaze is like the craziest thing to me. But when you look at, again, they could be conspiracy theories. But when you look at all of these things, one after the other, it's like, okay, you cut the budget on the people who are supposed to remove the brush. The brush caught on fire. People can't rebuild their homes. These insurance claims aren't being paid out. Oh, we're rezoning. And now the government can build low income housing. It's just like a strange, it's strange.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

So I don't know what to think. All I'll say is it's strange.

[A]

All I know is all those people should be like incredibly taken care of as quickly as possible. The permit should be approved. The people in Altadena end in the Palisades and like a governor and mayor should be doing everything they can to just give them like front of the line passes. Here's the easiest, best way to rebuild your life.

[B]

It just, it doesn't even make sense. Like we can, like who gave stimulus checks? Was it Biden or Trump?

[A]

Biden? Well, both.

[B]

Both. Okay. At the drop of a hat, we can give. What is that, a thousand bucks? Two thousand bucks to. How much was it? Do you remember?

[A]

We just tell the treasury.

[B]

Print, keep printing. Seriously, what deficit? Yeah, at the, at the drop of a hat. Right, we print. What is that? We give.

[A]

We give trillions. Trillions.

[B]

Okay, let's, let's say it's a trillion. You can't, you can't say natural disasters that completely evaporate Americans homes will be immediately rebuilt at the cost of the United States. Like again, something that is very obviously not arson, very obviously not insurance fraud, very publicly a natural disaster. I can't think of a better thing to use taxes for or, or country funds or like it's just, and again, I don't know enough to, to, to really say that this would be effective. But I, I am thinking that we've given a lot of money for worse things. And I love, I've always loved the idea of if I'm giving money, I want to know exactly where it went. That's why these big charities are tough for me to personally give to. I would rather give it to something that I'm 1000% sure I know exactly where it's going, right? And if I was told that we're raising money to build, like everybody needed to give $1,000 if you can, or $100 if you can to rebuild homes that were destroyed in California. And these people can't afford to rebuild their homes. Like I, yeah, whatever. I'm rambling.

[A]

Unfortunately, it just becomes really politically divisive, which is unfortunate. And I didn't see this in the same way. I mean, everyone ran to take a shit on California. Like ads like we started burning at 8:30 in the morning and by noon, like the Internet was inundated by people like trying to like dunk on us. And the reality is for similar natural disasters, like what happened recently in the flooding in Texas or how North Carolina was hit in Northern Florida, like I just, and maybe I'm missing it. I didn't see that, right? Like, I didn't see anyone going like, well, yeah, Texas, because of their politics, doesn't deserve help. Like everyone deserves help. It's America. It sucks. There were some rich people in the Palisades who lost their homes. And yes, they're not gonna feel it in the same way, but like there are also just thousands of people that have been in the palisades since the 50s who weren't rich, who like their entire retirement was that house, who lost it, and super working class, blue collar people in places like Altadena who lost everything. So to your point, yes, it should be a moment to galvanize and not to be like, let's dunk on the other side and their tragedy that they're enduring.

[B]

Or at least if you're going to dunk on it first, solve the problem at hand and then you can dunk on it and then you can make fun, but definitely help those people. And you brought up the right point, which is like so heavily politicized. What you made me think of is like, there are wars and there are people dying and there are terrible things going on every single day across the entire world. That's the equivalent of a Texas of a North Carolina, of something else. Meanwhile, the only thing people want to talk about is Israel. And I'm not saying that there is, there aren't terrible things going on. I'm just saying that you mentioned politics. There's a reason why the only thing that people seem to want to talk about is Israel. It's, it's hard to even get people these days to talk about Russia. It's like there are active wars going on all over the world. And so it just Makes you think, why do we only talk about California when it comes to a natural disaster? And why do we only talk about Israel when it comes to a war? So Jews. The Jews, by the way, they're in California and they're in Israel.

[A]

So no, sorry to say, we're everywhere, babe.

[B]

Yeah, we are.

[A]

Really quick, before we get. We move on. Can I read you. So, Gavin Newsom, like him or not like him, what's been effective is he's been starting to tweet in Trump's voice in, like, mocking tweets, which is like, cool, cool. Good to see you're spending your time well, Gavin, but it's ok. Here we go. Here was a recent tweet of his. Dana Ding Dong Perino. Never heard of her until today. Is melting down because of me. Gavin C. Newsom.

[B]

You know, you know that he's going to chatgpt and saying, put this in Trump's voice.

[A]

Fox hates that I am America's most favorite governor, ratings king saving America, while Trump can't even conquer the big stairs on Air Force One anymore. Trump has lost his step and Fox is losing it because when I type, America now wins. Thank you for your attention to this matter. He's nuts.

[B]

He's nuts. It's actually a great social media strategy. So love him or hate him.

[A]

Yeah, no, it's.

[B]

Kudos, Kudos. It's good. When else would you be reading Newsom's tweet?

[A]

No, it's good. You know, the schools in LA are shut down, but, you know, good job.

[B]

What is it? What is the temperature over there? I like that you say like and you stay politically correct. Love him or hate him? Most people hate him, right?

[A]

I can't tell. I don't. I don't know. I do think that I get a little bit of that when people hate him. They hate him so vehemently. And I always want to be like, wait, but why? And then also when people love him, I go, but why? I think it's probably somewhere in the middle.

[B]

I'm so with you. People need to stop blindly hating and loving people. Yeah, it's not cool. It's not cool. It's not cool. No matter who it is, you need to be informed and you need to have a legitimate reason why you love or hate someone. This, like, just what is it? Like, herd, herd mentality. No good. No matter what we're talking about. No matter what, educate yourself.

[A]

Unless it's the good guys getting a big, big raise. That herd mentality we're fine with. We're fine with it in California today in Santa Monica, it's 81 degrees.

[B]

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[A]

Well, you know, we're speaking about really important issues, but nothing more important that everyone's fall menu has just dropped. And I think we need to talk about it because there are some new fun fall menu items at your local coffee joint. Should we do the three majors?

[B]

Yes, please.

[A]

Okay. Coming in at number one for Dunkin Donuts. Our beloved Dunkin Dunkin serves up a fall first, the new cereal and milk latte, plus a lineup of fall favorites return cereal and milk latte. I would. I would definitely try that. Yes.

[B]

I would try it once before I passed away, but yes. Yeah, I would try it once like that. Like the amount of freaking sugar in there, I can't even imagine. I don't. I can't do sugary drinks anymore, Josh. They give me a headache. Am I old? Am I diabetic? Continue.

[A]

I don't know. You're a grown up. What about you, Olivia? I would give it a whirl. However, I'm also having a harder time with sugary drinks as I've gotten older. I'm having a tricky time with you. You're like 25.

[B]

I just turned 26.

[A]

Okay, stop. Wait. When was your birthday?

[B]

It was August 10th.

[A]

Ben.

[B]

We effed up.

[A]

I knew it was coming up. We missed it. Damn it. It's all right. I knew it was gonna come up on the podcast.

[B]

But don't worry, you do. You do have a present coming from us. We discussed it, we just didn't realize when it was. And no. Well, Josh, I wouldn't say that it's big. Let's temper expectations. It's nice. It's really lovely. August 10th. Lovely.

[A]

I told you. August 10th. Ben.

[B]

I don't think so. I never thought he was coming.

[A]

I had not. She could have said, you know it was today.

[B]

Yeah, I didn't know. I'm just saying. It's on. Dear media. Dear media, needed to send us an email. Hey, it's your producer's birthday. You might as well say happy Birthday. Like, how. How are we supposed to know?

[A]

I'll send you a Google Calendar invite for next year. Do it.

[B]

Yeah, it's good. Do you know when my birthday is, Olivia?

[C]

April 3rd.

[A]

Right.

[B]

How do you know that?

[A]

Because I texted you.

[B]

Happy birthday, King.

[A]

Oh, my God, Josh. I'm gonna come November, not 11th. That's Veterans Day.

[B]

12Th.

[A]

It's the 10th, but it's fine. Don't worry. I'm kill myself by next year. Olivia's gonna be working it unwell, and we're gonna be. We won't have to remember. She's gonna leave us like the rest of them.

[B]

Leave us.

[A]

Say hi to Marshall, Olivia.

[B]

By the way. She's staying. The fact that she even got our birthdays to within a day, I'm very impressed.

[A]

Yes.

[B]

And I'm embarrassed that we didn't have yours etched in stone on this. We should have stone, Josh.

[A]

Sorry, do you want.

[B]

Do you want stone?

[A]

Hold on. What do you think, Ben? 200. That's nice, right?

[B]

200 is nice.

[A]

Okay, you can. You can PayPal me.

[B]

Okay, 200 nice.

[A]

Or. All right, now, Olivia, if in the next month there's an email missed, I'm gonna think about this. 200.

[B]

Wait, what? Are you serious? No.

[A]

Yes.

[B]

Happy birthday. Happy birthday. This is birthday. Thank you.

[A]

I feel like Anna Wintour's hairstylist. That's how you make it right quickly.

[B]

That's how you make it right quick. Well done, Josh.

[A]

We clean up our side of the street here.

[B]

We do. We do.

[A]

We do.

[B]

Happy birthday to Olivia, 26 years young. It's fantastic. She's an old soul, though. She's an old soul.

[A]

Baruch hashem. E h. E h. Our beautiful Olivia. All right, so the fall drinks back at Dunkin'. The pumpkin spice signature latte. As we know, they have an iced pumpkin loaf. Great. You can add a pumpkin swirl to their favorite hot or iced drinks. But here's the part that I like. They're gonna have pumpkin cake donut and pumpkin munchkin donut hole treats. Hmm. Fun.

[B]

That's fun. I'm all in. All of these sound fantastic.

[A]

I like the branding of Pumpkin Munchkin. Yeah, Pumpkin Munchkin really gives you a visual. It does. They were doing a fun summer thing because I take my kids to Duncan like, once or twice a month where they were doing, like, 50 munchkins in a. In a beach bucket with a shovel.

[B]

You could bring it to the beach, but that's not. That's nice. I don't think that I live near a Duncan that participates in any of this because, you know, they're franchisees. Some of them. They do the fun stuff. Some of them don't. My local Dunkin, the only thing that I can get is an iced coffee and something with bacon. There's bacon in everything. I looked. Even for an egg bite. Josh. They don't have an egg bite. No bacon. They don't have an egg and cheese. No sausage. 100% meat.

[A]

Interesting, right? Wow.

[B]

I thought that was terribly fascinating, but terrible. I was starving. I couldn't get anything. That's upsetting. I thought so.

[A]

That's weird. I mean, we definitely have some, like, flagship Duncan's out here where I feel like in New York, like, you have one that's also sharing the space with, like, a tcby yogurt shop.

[B]

We have very. We have very sad Duncan's that are really just used coffee for cops. That's it. Like those. The cup of Joe. Fantastic. Fantastic. But that's it. That's all that we use our Duncan's for. Nothing else. Otherwise, we're Starbucks or I guess like a blank street or blank streets have taken over the city. They're everywhere. You have blank street coffee by you?

[A]

No.

[B]

Yeah, they're everywhere. But I'm a Starbucks loyalist.

[A]

Speaking of cops, did you see the video of the Rhode Island Attorney General, the AG who was. Who got arrested for being, like, drunk and disorderly outside of a restaurant with her other Karen friend?

[B]

No, I didn't see.

[A]

This AG Is Attorney General, right?

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

So I guess she's an AG for or AG. Or is she an outside assistant U.S. attorney? Assistant AG. I think she's an assistant AG, right. She wouldn't be the AG of Rhode Island. So anyway, it's her and her friend, and they're outside. And she's obviously a big fancy lawyer for the Rhode island government. And she is. They're basically outside of a restaurant trespassing, because the restaurant kicks them out because they're like, you're drunk and you're annoying. And she just keeps telling the cop. She's like, turn off Your body cam. And he's like, no. And she's like, I'm an eg. I know the law. Turn it off. If I ask you to turn it off, you have to turn it off. And he's like, ma', am, that's bullshit. No, I don't. Like, I'm leaving this on. And it was. It's bad. And she got arrested and her Karen friend got arrested, and it's. It's wild. And she is. She works for the government, so I can't imagine what that's gonna be like.

[B]

What I would give Josh, just for one night, for me and you to be drunk and disorderly.

[A]

God, I wanna be drunk and orderly. I wanna do everything you tell me to do, but I'm just a little bit f. Oh, man. Well, Starbucks, their lineup, they're going to have. Okay, Returning fall favorites. Ooh, let's just go. They're going to have the pumpkin spice latte. Pumpkin cold brew. Here's something fun. The new fall items. Pecan oat milk cortado, A new coffee drink featuring pecan and oat milk.

[B]

And pecan pecan.

[A]

Sure. Okay. Okay.

[B]

Just checking.

[A]

And you're going to have Italian sausage egg bit. New savory food item for the fall season.

[B]

Okay, that's too much Italian sausage egg bites. I don't like the way that sounds.

[A]

Yucky.

[B]

Yeah. It's making me think of, like, Vinnie Guadagnino's whole hog. Yeah, right. Does it sound like little mozzarella's just huge dong? Like it's just Italian sausage egg bites. I don't need to hear that. No. Good.

[A]

And then my beloved Tim Hortons, because you know that I'm Canadian.

[B]

You are.

[A]

I think this offering actually sounds top tier. They're going to have.

[B]

What's that about?

[A]

Let me tell you what it's about. They're pumpkin spiced ice cappuccino and maple cinnamon sugar. Maple cinnamon sugar cold brew.

[B]

Yum.

[A]

I'm a maple guy.

[B]

You love maple. Love, love. That said, I'm sorry, everybody's gonna hate me for this. There are just some things, in my opinion, that are better that aren't the real deal. And one of those for me is maple syrup.

[A]

Wow.

[B]

I prefer on my pancakes. A nice Aunt Jemima. I think it's top of the line or. Sorry. Pearl milling. Okay. Pearl milling versus this. Sometimes, I guess it depends on what type of maple syrup you get, Josh. But sometimes you get that fresh maple and it just doesn't taste as good. Sometimes you get it and it's Delicious. But I don't think that fresh maple's always better.

[A]

Yeah, artificial flavoring in general is better. It's just like an umami punch.

[B]

Yeah, it's delicious. Yeah, It'll kill you, but it's delicious. Yeah, totally.

[A]

Well, quick story before we get to speak, Pipes, you were in the news recently, Ben. Man with world's largest penis, slips, breaks arm and shower because giant penis got in the way. It was a very embarrassing incident. Being well endowed isn't all it's cracked up to be. We've heard of people whose mammoth members have injured their partners. However, UK man with the world's largest Johnson reportedly hurt himself after slipping and breaking his arm in the shower because the Titanic tally whacker got in his way.

[B]

The post is nuts.

[A]

Nuts. The AI specialist frequently goes viral for his enormous unit, which at 14 and a half inches long, is reportedly the biggest medically proven wang in the world. He even has cast of his privates at a museum in Iceland. But, yeah, I guess he was getting out of a hot shower and he couldn't see his feet, and he slept and broke his arm. It obscured his view, I think.

[B]

Here's a question for you, Josh. If you had a 14 and a half inch wiener, would you have a penis reduction surgery the same way that a woman born perhaps with triple J's, probably gets back problems? I do not. I have zero interest in a hog that size. Sounds incredibly inconvenient. I don't know what pants you wear.

[A]

I'm sending you the picture.

[B]

Surgery of the hog.

[A]

No, I'm sending you a picture of him sitting outside and this scumbag wears khakis. I mean, by the way, that's like big wang highlighter.

[B]

He also reported his own wang to the Guinness Book of World Records. Like, how do they know he is the biggest wang in the world? Because he went and told everyone. He's like, hey, look at me and my khakis. Let me see. Jesus Christ.

[A]

I know.

[B]

I'm gonna puke. I'm gonna puke.

[A]

What a piece you did.

[B]

Like, I don't know why I zoomed in.

[A]

I know. It's nuts.

[B]

Ew. It reminds me of that new, new menu item at Starbucks. I would only take Italian sausage.

[A]

I would only take public transportation if I was endowed like that. I would never. I would never take an Uber.

[B]

But what happens if you. You're on the subway, your. Your fat wang brushes up against the pole, and all of a sudden you're like, the Empire State Building. Like, I just. It must hurt to get an erection in something that confining. How does that no good? I mean those pants did look very stretchy. I don't know Josh. I don't know. Tuck. He must up tuck permanently, right? He's a snake in his pants.

[A]

Can't think about it anymore.

[B]

2. It's disgusting.

[A]

Should we get to his speak pipe?

[B]

Yucky. Yeah.

[A]

If you want to ask us a question, get some advice, go to speakpipe.com goodguides Keep it brief. Brevity is key.

[B]

We don't want to hear this picture. It's vile and he is like so gross.

[A]

Like God doesn't give with both hands, my boy.

[B]

No, if I was him I would be proud of it too because there's nothing else to be proud of.

[A]

Yeah, if you're a real uggo. That's why Ron Jeremy like, like the scales are even. That scumbag's got a huge piece but he looks like a. It's like a hedgehog.

[B]

I love the names like we won't say penis. I just love. I've been calling it hog. You call it peace. It's just funny.

[A]

Peace and love. Our first, our first speak pipe is from see from Sydney Toaster here.

[C]

I have a question. As a first time expecting mom, I am seven and a half months and unfortunately my husband and I we had to leave our apartment just for some unforeseen circumstances and instead of looking to pay for another apartment that's anywhere from three to 4,000, his mom, my mother in law offered her condo and it is two bedrooms. So we would be living with her. I'm fine doing that between now when the baby comes. But my question is as to dads, to newborns, what are your thoughts on potentially living with an in law? I mean she'll be there for help. Yes, but I also like my space. So I. I'm just really not sure how to go about this. I feel kind of stuck.

[A]

Thanks.

[B]

I think I missed the beginning. Why doesn't she have a house? What happened?

[A]

I don't know but I think, I don't know. But basically she just has the opportunity to save some money, live with her mother in law for the first couple months that her baby's there and, and figure out a new place.

[B]

You'll be really, really happy to have any, any helping hand like, like any. I think that it won't be nearly as bad as you think. You're gonna be sleeping when he sleeps and she's probably going to give you the ability to sleep even more. So I agree that you don't want to live with your in laws probably past six months, but like for the first six months, I think it could be incredibly helpful. What do you think?

[A]

Totally agree. I mean a two bedroom apartment is tight. It's tight, tight, tight. So you got to know that. And there'll definitely be moments where you will say, why did I do this? But, but I think a net positive will be if you can just bear down and treat this like a once in a lifetime moment and take that extra help. And if your mother in law is that way, oh my God, just let her help. You'll be so thankful.

[B]

Yeah. And maybe like it's on your husband to lay some ground rules, but like just, just have her knock before she comes into the bedroom. Like try and create some space within the, within this two bedroom and make sure there's mutual respect. But I think as long as there's mutual respect, I think it will be helped more. I think it'll be a net positive.

[A]

Totally agree. Let's hear from someone good, someone exciting and someone fun, fun, fun. Let's hear from Anonymous.

[C]

Oh my gosh. Hey, good guys. I heard Josh say a couple episodes ago that most of the speak bites he gets suck and they're just like a pain to listen to. And I was like, you know what, I have a lot to give and I should be giving it. So I want to try to be like a regular.

[B]

Thank you, Piper.

[C]

Okay, here's my question. So my parents are divorced. They've been divorced since I was like 10 to like 20 years. Growing up, obviously I had to do all of the separate holidays, like the birthdays, Christmas, two of everything.

[B]

Hated it.

[C]

Now I have my own child. I want to do one event where everybody comes, comes what ends up happening. I invite everybody. My dad will say, hey, I don't really want to get together with everyone. Meaning he doesn't want to go. If my mom's gonna be there, how about I do something special for her on, you know, he'll pick like a different day. So why don't I do like a lunch on Saturday? It'll be like our little birthday celebration. I think this is obnoxious, like come together for your grandkids. But some of my friends are like, well, I understand it's an uncomfortable situation. They don't want to be uncomfortable. Well, personally, like my parents were divorced, but my kids parents aren't divorced. She shouldn't have to have two holidays. I don't know. What do you guys think?

[B]

I think it's not about your dad. And it's not about your mom, so I. I actually completely agree with you. Like, it's nice if he wants to do something extra, but this idea that, like, they can't put aside their differences to come for their grandchild means that they're incredibly immature. It's just not. It's just not a thing. Like, it's not about you, gramps.

[A]

I don't think Olivia totally agrees with you, Ben. I can see from her adorable nod, I was not expecting to not agree on this point. And I'm interested to hear because I feel like you would think I would totally be on board with that. But I think 100%, if you plan a birthday and your father doesn't want to be there, then it's on him to completely plan his own thing for your kid, right? This is not on you to plan two things or to have, oh, we'll have an additional brunch days later. Like, if he wants to do something lovely and nice and cute, great. But I was thinking about this. I was listening to the great Robbie Hoffman. Like, and you're seeing this already with Ruby. We spend our entire life as parents with our kids till they're 18, but really until they're well into their 20s, where everything is a compromise for them. Like, everything. And, you know, I don't know the exact dynamics of what happened between the mother and the father, but, like, he's probably a guy in his 60s, and for whatever reason, like, he doesn't want to do that. So it sucks. It's not cool. It would be better if he could suck it up. But you live in the world that is, and you love your dad, and he doesn't want to do that. So you go, okay, you won't be a part of that thing. He won't really be missed. Your kid doesn't care. And if anything, they get, like, a little double dip. So maybe it's on you to not care.

[B]

I see that. But.

[A]

And. And then this is not like, bar mitzvah or, like, but then what if the autism.

[B]

But then what if the mom wants that, too?

[A]

What do you mean?

[B]

Like, what if? So it's the mom and the dad. They both don't want to see each other, they both don't want to come to the party. They both want to do their own things. Then all of a sudden, you have the mom doing something. You have your party, you have the dad doing something. I think that what she's saying is that she just wants the convenience of being able to throw a party and have her parents, unbiased, show up. Not for her, not for them, but for their grandchild who has nothing to do with their personal disagreements or problems or divorce. Like, I hear you, but I do think that in your 60s, you can just fuck up. But I get what you're saying.

[A]

You're probably right. I think. I think if it was a baptism of Bar mitzvah, graduation, obviously, you know, there's one like, suck it up. But I. I guess, like, if you have a. If I had a birthday party for Max, and then one day the following week, my mom was like, I'm gonna pick him up at noon and take him to lunch and movie and we're going to get dessert and celebrate. And then a couple days later, the father I never met suddenly wants to show up for Max. I'm like, what about me dad? But he comes back from the dead and he's like, oh, I want to take him to Dave and Buster's. You know, a couple. Like, that's so easy.

[B]

Oh, no, that part makes perfect sense. The part that you're forgetting is that Paige threw a gorgeous birthday party, invited them, and they declined. Like she threw up for them. I know. I see what you're saying, but you're right, too.

[A]

I think we're both. I think you're more right, But I'm just like. I guess I'm trying to understand the world that we live in.

[B]

But I do see what you're saying. I think that people just need to forgive and forget a little. It's been long enough. Your child now has a child. Whatever you were arguing about that you got divorced over like 40 years ago.

[A]

You should.

[B]

You can put aside for 18 days and. 18 years. That's what I'm saying.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Day a year, in theory. Is this a small party? Sorry, I have more questions. Is. Because now I'm thinking about this. I agree with you, Josh. If this is a 10 person party, I disagree with you. If this is a 30 person party, if it's easy to come and avoid your former spouse, no reason not to come. If this is a 10 person awkward dinner between grandma, grandpa, mom, dad, kids. That hardly sounds like a party. Then that's a different story. Okay, that's a little bit more awkward. And I'd understand why you wouldn't want to do that. But to your point, on a bar mitzvah, I don't know if you said quinceanera, but we can throw that one in there. Baptism, different story. Very easy to avoid being chummy with someone. I think it Depends on the size of the affair.

[A]

Yeah, I just. But I also think like in 12 step we learn like how to. How to live with unresolved issues. Right.

[B]

And.

[A]

You know, it inevitably. I think it's like first and foremost is getting over that hurt. Cause there's hurt for you, there's hurt for your kid. But I think you just have to like make your peace with like live in the world that is instead of the world that we think we deserve. And like you have parents that have mishegos. It could go really deep. We don't know how dark and shitty their marriage got before it ended. And some. Maybe somebody paid, maybe someone didn't, maybe someone held out on child support. You don't know. And. And they're just not down to clown. So yes, it, it should be this way on paper, but it isn't. So then it's incumbent on you to not be disturbed by it. How disturbed are you going to allow yourself to be?

[B]

That I completely agree with that said, we're not asking them to clown. They don't need to clown.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Just show up independently for your grandchild.

[A]

You're right.

[B]

You're right as well. There's so much here. This is deep. A deep speak pipe.

[A]

So deep. This one less deep. Anonymous.

[C]

Hi, Josh and Ben. I'm a moron and I just launched my own granola company. I'm really excited about it. It's currently called Cheese Granola, but I need to pivot due to trademark reason. So I would love your all's opinion on the new name because you're both foodies and great at branding. So the names in between are Slow Street, a granola company, or Park Day. Slow streets are streets in San Francisco, where I live, that are locked off to cars and encourage more community movement like runners, bikers, yeah, dog walkers, anything. And then Park Day kind of speaks for itself, but in between those two. So would love your feedback. Thank you.

[B]

Did she say that the original name of the company was called Cheese?

[A]

Her Cheese. I think she said Cheese Granola. Geez Granola. Ah, geez.

[B]

Granola Better than cheese. I hate to be the one to tell you this, it actually doesn't matter at all. Make it as short and as distinct as possible. If it rallies around a street, that's great. Nobody's gonna give a shit. The only thing that they're gonna care about is does the granola taste good? How maybe are the macros on the back? Is it available at my local grocery store? But otherwise it's going to be short. Sweet. Something that people can remember and distinct, not like other granola companies. So I'm happy you didn't go with G's, because G's is just not. It's not, like, different enough. I don't know. G's just weird to me. I liked. What was the first one? Street.

[A]

Side street.

[B]

I like. I like Slow Street. That's fine. Slow Street. Slow street, granola. It's not great. It's fine.

[A]

It sounds like an episode of Sesame street for kids with special needs, you know?

[B]

Sorry. No, that's good. Don't say sorry. Elmo. Elmo Road. The small bus. Today, little busy. And on that note, what are you, nuts?

[A]

Our what are you nuts? Moment of the week are our gripes with people, places and things, both big and small. Whatever's sticking in your craw, Ben, what do you got?

[B]

The other day, I was on a Southwest flight. Don't ask. Don't ask. That's a story for another day, love. And we land, Josh. And immediately, I don't think that the wheels had even touched the air conditioning. They shut it. They shut it off. And, you know, you still have to. You wait on the tarmac, you're waiting to get to your gate. There's at least a half hour this plane went from. It was a perfect temperature the whole flight to scalding hot. And when I asked the flight attendant, she said, yeah, it's totally normal to conserve energy to shut the air upon landing. What are you, nuts? I'm still on the plane. I'm scorching hot. I'm sweating. I'm in a middle seat because I thought that there's no chance in hell that anybody is on a Southwest flight from iCELIP to PBI on a Wednesday in August. But of course it was a full flight. Josh, I'm row 30, middle seat, no air. What are you, nuts?

[A]

You probably checked in late, too, because you took it for granted. You didn't check in at the 24 hour mark.

[B]

No, I didn't think that I needed to pay for priority on Southwest, who's going to Florida in August from Long Island.

[A]

Yeah. First of all, there should be no Southwest airline on East Islip. Are we okay to go like three or four minutes over? Yeah. Okay. Okay. Yeah. There should not be a plane called Southwest on East Islip, New York.

[B]

I mean, I guess there should. It was a full flight. I don't know. Nuts. Yeah. Southwest. You're supposed to operate in the Southwest. You know what else is nuts? Not giving this episode five stars. That's a what Are you nuts? Listen to us wherever you get your podcasts, watch us on YouTube, share our clips, Instagram and Tick Tock Mondays and Thursdays folks. We will see ya next time.

[A]

Please note that this episode may contain.

[C]

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