Great Company with Jamie Laing

Episode: Cat Burns on Grief | GREAT MOMENTS

Release Date: January 19, 2026
Guest: Cat Burns (Singer-Songwriter)

Episode Overview

This episode of "Great Moments" from the Great Company podcast features powerful highlights from Jamie Laing’s conversation with singer-songwriter Cat Burns. The focus is on Cat’s honest and inspiring reflections about grief, resilience, and the transformative power of vulnerability. Throughout the conversation, Cat opens up about the impact of her father's absence and eventual passing, her relationship with her mum, the inner work of forgiveness, and how personal pain translates into her music. The episode is warm, relatable, and moving, offering listeners comfort and insight around grief, healing, and connection.

Key Discussion Points & Insights

Cat's Relationship with Her Parents and Early Grief

• Father's Absence and Loss
  • Cat shares that her father was not present much during her childhood and passed away four years ago, on Christmas Day.
  • "I didn't have the best relationship with my dad and he passed away four years ago. Christmas Day." (03:02)
  • The absence led to a deeper appreciation for her mum, whom she calls “the queen of my existence.” (02:54)
• Home Life After Divorce
  • Parents separated when she was 7, divorced by age 9.
  • Her mother became her main support; the atmosphere at home immediately improved after her father's departure.
  • "The vibes in this house are not good. So once he was gone, I was like, oh yes, the truth." (05:22)

The Nature of Grief and Love

• Connection Between Grief and Compassion
  • Cat reflects on the bittersweet beauty of grief, explaining that those who’ve experienced it are “some of the most loving people you could meet,” because they understand the fragility and value of love.
  • "We’ve learned the price we pay for love. ...It's a sad club to be a part of, but... it’s a beautiful one as well." (03:05)
• Forgiveness and Letting Go
  • Cat describes how she worked to forgive both herself and her father after his death, using active imagination and therapy to heal.
  • She chooses to take only positive memories from childhood: "Maybe I’m gonna pick things from my childhood that I actually want to take with me and keep and let go of the things that I don’t." (08:01)
• On Forgiveness:
  • “Forgiveness is for yourself.” (08:49)
  • Discusses how resentment often mirrors our own neglected boundaries, emphasizing the importance of self-surrender and acceptance.
  • “When you forgive yourself and shed this... most of life is about surrendering to it. And the resistance is what causes us to be ill and not be okay.” (09:35)

Emotional Resilience and Mental Health

• Survival Instincts and Suffering
  • The conversation touches on human tendencies to focus on suffering and disaster (a survival mechanism), making it harder to embrace positivity.
  • "We lean into that sort of suffering place. It's much easier for us to lean into the suffering, be a victim. It's much harder to not be and be positive and happy..." (10:00)
• Mindfulness and Acceptance
  • Cat shares practical techniques for managing anxiety—relaxing the body, breathing, and letting feelings flow through rather than resisting them.
  • “…We are stronger than we are told we are by society and all those things. ...You can just let it flow through you. It doesn't have to—You don't have to be like, no, I shouldn't feel this. I don't want to feel this. Just feel it.” (10:32, 11:02)

The Loss of Cat’s Father

• Details of His Passing
  • Her father died from cancer, after two years of illness (diagnosed when Cat was 18, passed away when she was 20).
  • "He got diagnosed when I was 18. He was in and out of remission, and then he passed. Christmas Day." (11:34)
• Impact on Her Life
  • The experience, though difficult, allowed Cat to grow in vulnerability and deepened her connections with others—both personally and through her music.
  • "It allowed me to connect with everyone in my life on a way deeper level...I feel like I'll be safe around you." (12:08)

Creativity and Universal Human Connection

• Music as Therapy and Solidarity
  • Cat sees songwriting as a form of therapy that connects people through shared experiences.
  • “That’s why I make music in the first place… There’s something about, like, it could be really hard for someone to say something, but to sing it is easier...” (12:45)
  • She believes in music's power to assure listeners they're not alone in their struggles:
    • "Music is a way... to connect people to each other. ...there might be someone... who’s isolated... And then they can slap on a song and someone's talking about that exact scenario and being like... I'm not alone in this." (13:20)
  • Acknowledges that everyone experiences difficulty and isolation: “Our lives aren’t that unique. We’re all in the same simulation… so music is a way to connect people...” (13:05)

Notable Quotes & Moments

• On the nature of grief:
  • "People who experience grief are one of the most loving people you could meet. ...We've learned the price we pay for love." – Cat Burns (03:03)
• On home life after divorce:
  • "I was like, the vibes in this house are not good. So once he was gone, I was like, oh yes, the truth." – Cat Burns (05:22)
• On forgiveness:
  • “Forgiveness is for yourself.” – Cat Burns (08:49)
  • “Seeking revenge is like drinking poison and wanting another person to die. It only hurts yourself.” – Jamie Laing (08:41)
• On music as therapy:
  • “There’s something about, like, it could be really hard for someone to say something, but to sing it is easier... Music is a way… to connect people to each other.” – Cat Burns (12:45, 13:05)
• On feeling less alone:
  • "There might be someone sitting in their room who's isolated themselves... and then they can slap on a song and someone's talking about that exact scenario... and being like, oh my God, I'm not alone..." – Cat Burns (13:20)

Timestamps for Key Segments

• [02:46–03:41] – Cat Burns shares her family background and early experiences of grief.
• [03:42–05:40] – Discussion of family dynamics, the divorce, and her mum’s influence.
• [06:00–08:09] – Forgiveness, healing, and actively choosing which parts of childhood to carry forward.
• [08:40–09:51] – On resentment, forgiveness, and the necessity of surrender in healing.
• [10:00–11:25] – Survival instincts, leaning into suffering, and how to break the cycle with mindfulness.
• [11:25–12:08] – The impact of her father’s illness and death on her personal growth and relationships.
• [12:24–14:02] – Music as a tool for healing and connecting with others in their vulnerability.
• [14:02–End] – Jamie reflects on Cat’s wisdom and encourages listeners to appreciate their loved ones.

Takeaways

• The Power and Complexity of Grief: Cat’s vulnerability and honesty offer comfort to those struggling with loss.
• Forgiveness as a Self-Gift: True healing is about letting go for your own sake, not for the person who hurt you.
• Creative Expression: Cat’s music is an act of self-therapy and solidarity for listeners who may feel alone in their pain.
• Appreciate Loved Ones: Jamie echoes Cat’s message, reminding us to value the people in our lives while we can.

This episode provides meaningful guidance on processing grief, exercising forgiveness, and harnessing vulnerability for deeper human connection—making it helpful listening for anyone seeking empathy, comfort, or inspiration.