Great Company with Jamie Laing

Episode: Dr Aliza Pressman: Parenting Advice You NEED To Hear | GREAT MOMENTS
Date: March 16, 2026
Guest: Dr. Laura Markham (appears in place of Dr. Aliza Pressman in this episode’s excerpted conversation)

Episode Overview

This episode of Great Company features host Jamie Laing in a focused conversation with parenting expert Dr. Laura Markham (noted in transcript in place of Dr. Aliza Pressman). The discussion centers on debunking popular parenting myths, understanding the science behind attachment and parental well-being, and offering empowering advice for parents navigating the confusing and judgment-laden world of modern child-rearing.

Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. The Great Sleep Debate: Where Should Your Child Sleep?

[02:30 - 06:48]

• Jamie Laing introduces the common debate: Should a baby sleep in a cot, in the parents’ bed, or in a separate room?
• Dr. Laura Markham clarifies that:
  • Most research shows where your baby sleeps is largely irrelevant for attachment or emotional development; what matters is that both baby and parents get enough sleep.
  • Safety recommendations (especially in the first year) are based around SIDS (Sudden Infant Death Syndrome) risk—not attachment or future wellbeing.
  • “There’s so much robust data showing it just needs—like what matters is sleep. Both the parents’ sleep and the kid’s sleep. All that other noise…”
    — Dr. Laura Markham [05:02]
• Bed-sharing should be approached with caution and is recommended only if safety guidelines are stringently met.

Memorable Quote

“Let people say what they will if it makes them feel better, like ‘This is how we do it in this household, it’s really good for attachment.’ But it’s—it's stories.”
— Dr. Laura Markham [06:41]

2. Parenting Myths, Social Media, and “Noise”

[06:48 - 07:45]

• Jamie notes the pressure and anxiety caused by conflicting advice, especially on social media.
• Dr. Markham emphasizes that most hotly-debated parenting choices don’t “move the needle” in terms of a child’s ultimate development.
• She laments irresponsibly prescriptive advice that leaves parents feeling inadequate or judged.

Memorable Quote

“There are big things, like, we talked about some of the big things that really, really move the needle. But… if you’re ever wondering if something is going to move the needle on how your child grows and develops, the answer is probably it doesn’t.”
— Dr. Laura Markham [07:17]

3. Breastfeeding vs. Formula & The Truth About Attachment

[07:51 - 09:09]

• Dr. Markham challenges the idea that “breast is best” is a universal prescription.
• The most crucial factor: the parent’s ability to function and bond, regardless of feeding method.
• No robust evidence links breastfeeding to stronger attachment; what matters is emotional presence and mental health.
• Adoption is affirmed as equally valid in bonding.

Memorable Quote

“When you unpack the data, [breastfeeding]’s not better than a mom who’s functioning. It’s not better than a mom who’s feeling good... That baby’s not less well off ever. Cause they didn’t breastfeed.”
— Dr. Laura Markham [08:30]

4. Parental Mental Health & Its Impact on Children

[09:09 - 13:05]

• Discussion shifts to postpartum (postnatal) depression and its often “invisible” toll on parents of any gender.
• Dr. Markham assures listeners: perinatal mental health issues are treatable and seeking help is the most loving act a parent can do for their child.
• Taking care of your well-being is “putting your oxygen mask on first”; crucial, not a luxury.

Memorable Quotes

“It is crucial for your child, because the mental health of the parent, particularly the primary parent, is inextricably linked to the mental health of the child. It’s the most important thing you can do for your child is to take care of your mental health.”
— Dr. Laura Markham [11:47]

“When you get on the airplane and they say, ‘Put your oxygen mask on first before helping a child next to you’... That’s so you don’t die or pass out. And then what’s your child going to do? So that’s why we have to do it.”
— Dr. Laura Markham [12:26]

5. Rules of Good Parenting: Feelings vs. Behaviors

[13:05 - 14:03]

• Dr. Markham articulates a vital distinction:
  • “All feelings are welcome. All behaviors are not.”
• The goal: Allow children (and adults) to feel anything, but establish boundaries around which behaviors are acceptable.

Memorable Quote

“Am I honoring this person’s feelings? Because I’m not going to be able to tell somebody how to feel... So you can feel angry, you can’t punch me in the face. That to me, is good parenting.”
— Dr. Laura Markham [13:37]

6. Advice on Rejecting Unhelpful Parenting Advice

[14:03 - 14:39]

• Jamie asks which common advice Dr. Markham wishes parents would ignore.
• Dr. Markham’s answer: If the advice makes you feel like a “shitty parent,” it’s not for you.

Memorable Quote

“If you’re hearing somebody give advice and it’s making you feel like you’re a shitty parent, it’s probably not a good fit.”
— Dr. Laura Markham [14:30]

7. Self-Compassion: The Antidote to Parental Perfectionism

[14:39 - 17:08]

• Jamie asks what Dr. Markham would say to a brand-new parent.
• Focus on self-compassion—perfection is unattainable and counterproductive.
• Model self-acceptance for your children: the internal voice you want for your child is the one you should practice with yourself.

Memorable Guidance

“As you make mistakes right now, before you’re a parent, try to use the voice inside your head that you dream that you hope your child will use when they make mistakes.”
— Dr. Laura Markham [15:16]

• Practical Example:
  Instead of harsh self-criticism for mistakes (“You’re so dumb. You’re such an idiot.”), try, “Well, that sucks. I wish I had left earlier. Next time I’m going to remember to plan.”

Timestamps for Key Segments

• 02:30 – Introduction to the sleep location debate
• 03:14 – Dr. Markham debunks myths around baby sleep and attachment
• 06:48 – Discussion on the overwhelming parenting “noise” and social media pressures
• 07:51 – Addressing breastfeeding, formula, and attachment
• 09:09 – Postpartum depression and the mental health of parents
• 12:23 – The airplane “oxygen mask” analogy and its importance for parents
• 13:17 – “All feelings are welcome, all behaviors are not”
• 14:19 – Advice on disregarding hurtful or shaming advice
• 14:50 – Self-compassion as the parenting superpower

Notable Quotes

“There’s no prescription that is gonna be accurate for every family.”
— Dr. Laura Markham [07:51]

“Your attachment is utterly unrelated to those procedural things like sleep.”
— Dr. Laura Markham [06:32]

“Perfection is the enemy of actually being a really good parent.”
— Dr. Laura Markham [14:52]

Summary Takeaway

This episode is a reassuring guide for parents overwhelmed by conflicting advice. Dr. Laura Markham champions flexibility, mental health, and intuitive parenting over rigid “rules.” She encourages self-compassion, healthy boundaries, and trusting yourself above all else, reminding listeners that their well-being directly benefits their children more than any prescribed routine or trend. The episode will leave parents feeling more confident, less alone, and empowered to do what truly works for them.