KATHERINE RYAN: HOW I CHANGED MY MINDSET & MADE A LIFE FOR ME & MY DAUGHTER

Summary

Great Company with Jamie Laing

Episode: KATHERINE RYAN: HOW I CHANGED MY MINDSET & MADE A LIFE FOR ME & MY DAUGHTER
Date: September 30, 2025

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Episode Overview

This episode of "Great Company" features comedian and writer Katherine Ryan, who joins Jamie Laing and co-host Jemima Kirke for an open, candid, and often hilarious discussion. The conversation spans personal transformation, single motherhood, comedy industry secrets, attitudes towards intimacy, parenting philosophies, and navigating public life. Katherine shares her journey from financial precarity and insecurity to a celebrated career, offers raw reflections on her fears and strengths, tackles double standards in comedy, and gives listeners a preview of her new show, "Write Me Dirty." The tone throughout is frank, warm, witty, and insightful, with bursts of both vulnerability and classic Katherine Ryan sharpness.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Redefining Mindset Through Adversity

[11:42–19:33]

• Katherine discusses becoming a single mother in her mid-20s, diagnosed with lupus, and lacking support (emotional or financial) from her daughter's father.
• Felt alone—family abroad, no reliable partner—and fearful for her own and her daughter’s safety.
• Realized she couldn’t control others; focused on what she did have.
• Quote:

  “When I had nothing, I realized I had everything already.” (15:35, Katherine Ryan)

• Discovering gratitude—even at her lowest—brought her newfound abundance and opportunities.
• Emphasizes the importance of focusing on what you do have, not what’s missing.

2. Parenting: From Solo to Partnership

[19:33–21:25]

• On the experience of parenting alone versus with her current husband, Bobby:
  • Keeping score between partners is natural but counter-productive.
  • Parenting with empathy, treating children as people not babies.
• Innovative approach: started potty training her children at three months, all trained before a year.
• Quote:

  “Friends don’t let friends shit themselves at lunch.” (21:12, Katherine Ryan)

3. Navigating Pregnancy & Vulnerability

[09:03–10:14, 39:27–40:08]

• Katherine has had seven pregnancies—some didn’t go past the first trimester. She speaks openly about miscarriage and normalizing the messy realities.
• Jamie and Katherine share the fears and emotional shifts that accompany becoming parents.
• On being supported during pregnancy:

  “No one’s ever really been that supportive to me.” (39:41, Katherine Ryan)

4. Women in Comedy & Double Standards

[23:35–24:20]

• Discusses how female comedians are described with more aggressive, negative language than men—e.g., “crass” or “vulgar.”
• The scrutiny about how her material might impact her children, a question male comedians rarely face.
• Quote:

  “People have asked me in interviews, ‘how are you going to explain to your children when they look at your material and see what a dirty mouth you have?’ I’m like, is anyone asking Frankie Boyle?” (24:12, Katherine Ryan)

5. Industry Secrets & Speaking Out

[24:56–26:40]

• Katherine reflects on talking publicly about a predatory figure within the comedy world:
  • For years, it was an “open secret”—no one cared.
  • Only recently have whistleblowers, timing, and culture combined to bring attention.
• Quote:

  “I believe very strongly [he] has been an open secret in our industry as someone who is predatory. And no one's ever cared...Then all of a sudden, everyone did care.” (25:03, Katherine Ryan)

6. Emotion, Intimacy & Relationships

[29:21–34:39]

• Honest chat about intimacy post-babies, frequency of sex, managing differing libidos, and using data to improve marriage (Katherine logs sex in an app).
• The importance of three "types" of sex in long-term relationships: scheduled, spontaneous, and quickies.
• Quote:

  “If you haven’t had sex, you’re in a fight. You need the release.” (33:29, Katherine Ryan)

• Jamie admits he’s learned patience and to not mirror his partner’s emotions—a shift from previous relationships.

7. Real Housewives & “Write Me Dirty”

[44:08–48:45]

• Katherine is hosting both “Write Me Dirty”—an erotic fiction comedy podcast—and the Real Housewives of London.
• "Write Me Dirty" aims to show comedians out of their comfort zone, writing and sharing erotic stories about each other.
• Quote:

  “Comedians are weirdly prudish … it’s so destabilizing and awkward … that’s when you get comedians at their best.” (45:46, Katherine Ryan)

• On Housewives:
  • The cast is purposefully unknown and international, promoting authenticity over fame or media training.

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Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

| Timestamp | Speaker | Quote/Notable Moment | |-----------|----------------|--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------| | 15:35 | Katherine Ryan | “When I had nothing, I realized I had everything already.” | | 21:12 | Katherine Ryan | “Friends don’t let friends shit themselves at lunch.” | | 24:12 | Katherine Ryan | “Is anyone asking Frankie Boyle?” | | 25:03 | Katherine Ryan | “I believe very strongly [he] has been an open secret...And no one's ever cared.” | | 33:29 | Katherine Ryan | “If you haven’t had sex, you’re in a fight. You need the release.” | | 39:41 | Katherine Ryan | “No one’s ever really been that supportive to me.” | | 45:46 | Katherine Ryan | “[Write Me Dirty] is so destabilizing and awkward ... that’s when you get comedians at their best.” | | 48:17 | Katherine Ryan | “This is two kinds of release. Wanking and laughing and crying—three kinds of release.” | | 52:03 | Katherine Ryan | “I like when Jimmy Carr says, ‘Never complain, never explain.’” | | 56:26 | Katherine Ryan | “A respectable husband and father ... finishes the day on a bag of cocaine, face first in a sex worker’s asshole.” |

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Highlighted Segments & Timestamps

• Mindset shift after single motherhood & lupus diagnosis: [11:42–19:33]
• Parenting philosophy, early potty training: [21:09–22:51]
• Pregnancy, miscarriage, and partner support: [09:03–10:14, 39:27–40:08]
• Industry-wide sexism & double standards in comedy: [23:35–24:20]
• Speaking out about predators in comedy: [24:56–26:40]
• Intimacy and managing marriage data: [29:21–34:39]
• Launching “Write Me Dirty” and views on comedy media: [44:08–48:45]
• Gamely fielding rapid-fire personality questions: [52:01–61:40]

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The Original Spirit & Tone

• Katherine is characteristically fearless, forthright, and quick-witted—often mixing vulnerable truths with deadpan zingers.
• Jamie’s earnestness and curiosity draw out Katherine’s honesty, and Jemima provides supportive, light-hearted interjections.
• The conversation is intimate and informal, with laughter never far from confessions or heavy topics.

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Summary for First-Time Listeners

This episode is an authentic, insightful, and extremely funny deep dive into Katherine Ryan’s life and mind. It’s valuable listening for anyone interested in:

• Resilience and personal change
• Maternal strength and solo parenting
• Navigating creative industries as a woman
• The real talk on love, sex, and long-term partnership
• Feminist takes on comedy and cultural shifts

You’ll leave with a sense of Katherine’s self-assuredness, gratitude, sharp social observations—and the distinct feeling of being in "great company."

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Further Listening

• Link to Katherine’s “Write Me Dirty” podcast is available in the show notes.
• Engage with “Great Company” on Instagram or via email for more inspiring, honest conversations with outstanding guests.

Transcript

[Jemima Kirke]

Coming up in this episode of Great.

[Katherine Ryan]

Company, I spoke about my experience with someone.

[Jamie Laing]

Yeah.

[Katherine Ryan]

I didn't say his name. It has been an open secret in our industry as someone who is predatory. Everybody cared. All of a sudden they were like, who, Katherine? Who?

[Jamie Laing]

I was like, was that nerve wracking to talk about it?

[Katherine Ryan]

I certainly think, well, hello, I'm Katherine Ryan and I am in Great Company, an actress, writer and podcast, the hilarious.

[Jamie Laing]

UK based Canadian comedian, the one and only Katherine Wyan.

[Katherine Ryan]

If you are a woman doing any kind of comedy, there are adjectives used to describe you that they wouldn't use to describe a man. Like they use quite aggressive language with us. And people have asked me in interviews like, well, how are you going to explain to your children? They look at your material and they see what a dirty mouth you have. I'm like, is anyone asking Frankie Boyle? That's so true. Yeah.

[Jamie Laing]

What do you say to that? Though?

[Katherine Ryan]

I was 24, I was fearful, like literally fearful for my life. And then I thought I would lose my daughter somehow. It was never a place of comfort. There was never a place of financial security. No one's ever really been that supportive to me.

[Jamie Laing]

Really. Bobby's not.

[Katherine Ryan]

This is my first time parenting with a partner. There is friction and you have no one but each other. But we have perspective and we have empathy.

[Jamie Laing]

Doing comedy now, do you still have that same buzz, that same excitement?

[Katherine Ryan]

It's different. I don't like when people, you're the greatest. The greatest company. Is that what you're going to call this episode?

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[Jamie Laing]

Hello, everyone. My name is Jamie Laing and this is Great Company.

[Katherine Ryan]

Hi.

[Jemima Kirke]

I'm gonna say it first. Hi.

[Jamie Laing]

Hello, Jemima.

[Jemima Kirke]

Hello, Jamie.

[Jamie Laing]

Welcome back to all you wonderful listeners to Great Company podcast. Yeah, very exciting.

[Jemima Kirke]

My little owls are wonderful.

[Jamie Laing]

You haven't said this for a while.

[Katherine Ryan]

Hoot. Hoot.

[Jemima Kirke]

Can I say we recently did something live. Well, actually, it was a while ago.

[Jamie Laing]

You did a live show.

[Jemima Kirke]

Yeah, and I'm at Wilderness. Thank you to anyone who came. It was really great.

[Jamie Laing]

A few people have spoken to me about it over there.

[Jemima Kirke]

We did not hoot with the audience. And I got home and it annoyed me.

[Jamie Laing]

I don't think it's a thing. Look, if we ever do a live tour, then we can possibly bring it into.

[Jemima Kirke]

Actually, I'll dip my toe in a hoot.

[Jamie Laing]

But anyway, I want to say welcome back to the show. Thank you so much for coming back. Now, today's episode is another. I mean, I feel very lucky that we keep saying this, but it is kind of true. We get to chat to so many amazing people in each episode. I walk away going, that was great. And if you enjoy today's episode, remember we have a catalog of other episodes that you can go and click on and listen to where you can be entertained, inspired, and educated throughout. They're all brilliant in their own way. Today's episode is with Katherine Ryan, and.

[Jemima Kirke]

It is a hoot.

[Jamie Laing]

It's a real hoot. And some people probably think, well, I'VE heard Catherine on the podcast. This Catherine that you're gonna experience today is different to wherever you've seen her before. We talk about parenthood, we talk about comedy, We. We go into details around when she spoke about, you know, the time that she felt a little bit uneasy with a certain individual in the comedy circuit. Lots of different things happen. And also she talks about her new show, which Jampot have created, and asked her very kindly to host it, which is called Write Me Dirty. If you haven't listened to Write Me Dirty, Katherine is the host. She explains it all in the show today. We'll leave a link in the description as well, which you go and click on and go and listen to it. Cause it's a fantastic show.

[Jemima Kirke]

It's a very good show.

[Jamie Laing]

I'm really excited for this one today. Remember, if you haven't subscribed to our show already, please do click that subscribe button. It's free and it does us wonders. Also, get in touch via Instagram reat company podcast, or you can send us an email. Greatcompanyampopproductions.co.uk. you ready for this Jomana?

[Jemima Kirke]

I'm very excited about this episode.

[Jamie Laing]

Here we go. Enjoy this episode of Great Company with Katherine Ryan.

[Katherine Ryan]

Hello, I'm Katherine Ryan, and I am in great company. If you died, I plan to, and.

[Jamie Laing]

I wasn't at your funeral, would you be upset?

[Katherine Ryan]

Oh, I'm not gonna have a funeral. My body's just gonna be kicked down the street after being harvested by medicine. Like I don't care at all.

[Jamie Laing]

I would be gonna have a funeral.

[Katherine Ryan]

I would be livid if people did a funeral for me.

[Jamie Laing]

What?

[Katherine Ryan]

Or posted about my death on social media.

[Jamie Laing]

Get out of here.

[Katherine Ryan]

I want a complete blackout.

[Jamie Laing]

You're just gonna go from alive to nothing.

[Katherine Ryan]

Yes.

[Jamie Laing]

That's it. Done.

[Katherine Ryan]

Yeah. For real?

[Jamie Laing]

Really?

[Katherine Ryan]

Yeah.

[Jamie Laing]

You don't think you'll be missed and you want to be celebrated?

[Katherine Ryan]

No, I just want to disappear slowly into the abyss. Posthumous Katherine Ryan does not exist. Because I think. I don't like when people die and then everyone posts, like, here's my selfie that I got with him one time six years ago where he looks like shit. But I was there. Like, I just. I don't think anyone does it justice. And I want a dignified silence if.

[Jamie Laing]

God forbid. But if you died. Yeah, Write Me Dirty would do really well.

[Katherine Ryan]

Oh, yeah, right.

[Jamie Laing]

Would do really well.

[Katherine Ryan]

Yeah. Just put sad music over the filth.

[Jamie Laing]

Look how good you look.

[Katherine Ryan]

Oh, yeah.

[Jamie Laing]

Yeah.

[Katherine Ryan]

So the last time I came on a Podcast with you. I looked so bad that my husband was accused of being an abuser because people were like, look at Catherine, she's been crying all night. And I was like, no, I feel great. Yeah, I'm just over 40 now. And they were like, he's an abuser. Like, the comments. I was like, okay, I need to get a facelift just so Bobby doesn't go to jail.

[Jamie Laing]

We had a problem with our lighting.

[Katherine Ryan]

No, I had come off a flight from New York.

[Jamie Laing]

Yes, you had.

[Katherine Ryan]

And I was probably pregnant then, too. And I had some, like, lymphatic issue, like, whatever. And I did my makeup in the car. And I used to be young and fresh and I could turn up to places post Heathrow. But no, on this occasion, people jumped straight to assault. It's like. And I don't think that would have happened if I weren't sat so close to Sophie. Do you know what I mean?

[Jamie Laing]

Are you abusing?

[Katherine Ryan]

All the comments were like, yeah, look at her. Look at her. She's been crying for days. I was like, okay.

[Jamie Laing]

Oh, God. Do you read the comments sometimes?

[Katherine Ryan]

Obviously, yeah, but they don't bother me. I like them.

[Jamie Laing]

Yeah, so do I. Yeah, sometimes I'll.

[Katherine Ryan]

Read them and I just find it interesting. I'm very ambivalent towards, like, criticism. I think it's all good for the.

[Jamie Laing]

Brand at the moment we're talking. You're pregnant. How are you feeling?

[Katherine Ryan]

Like shit around you. Because of how well your wife is doing?

[Jamie Laing]

Not though.

[Katherine Ryan]

I swear, I think we're the same pregnant. I think, like, game recognized game. This is my seventh pregnancy, so I know everything. I always think I know everything.

[Jamie Laing]

This is your seventh?

[Katherine Ryan]

Yeah, because I'm old, so they don't all make it past the first trimester, which sounds dark to talk about, but I'm fine about it. It's just part of life.

[Jamie Laing]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Katherine Ryan]

It's tricky to talk like that around young pregnant people because you don't want to sully their experience. Like, once you know the math.

[Jamie Laing]

You.

[Katherine Ryan]

Don'T go into the scan with the same pizzazz. You're a bit like, oh, God, no, I know.

[Jamie Laing]

I'm with you. But I'm like you. I'm very honest and open with these things, but I. Considering from a male point of view, so I find it almost.

[Katherine Ryan]

Yeah.

[Jamie Laing]

I can't really say anything. I. I feel bad what I can say about that, because I haven't been in someone's body or experienced that or gone through that, but it is. I. You know, it's. It happens a Lot.

[Katherine Ryan]

Yeah. And people kind of just started talking about it in lockdown, weirdly. And now everyone's very open about it. But I always think of the first timers and you go, oh, you don't want to spoil it for them. Like, I see girls, I've worked with girls, runners and production assistants were like, good news. I'm six weeks pregnant. And I'm like, oh, okay. And I'm like. Because I don't know how it's going to go.

[Jamie Laing]

I know.

[Katherine Ryan]

And I just. And they're so excited and they're like, buying things.

[Jamie Laing]

I'm like, what do you say to that, though? Because it is. Because when people. It is. Especially when. When Sophie and I got. I'll be honest with you, when Sophie and I got pregnant, straight away, she phoned her mum, she phoned everyone. And I was a bit like. I was like, I don't think we should keep it. I don't know if we should keep this. You know, the first. Just to cover it. The first time she thought she was pregnant.

[Katherine Ryan]

Yeah.

[Jamie Laing]

We were in a restaurant together and she told me, she said, I think I'm pregnant. And I.

[Katherine Ryan]

And you left.

[Jamie Laing]

And I left.

[Katherine Ryan]

I'm a fan of yours, Jamie. I know what you do in your life, man.

[Jamie Laing]

And it was a lot. It's a lot to handle.

[Katherine Ryan]

And that's because you needed to decompress and go for a walk.

[Jamie Laing]

Yeah. Because I. I was. I. I think it's. I think it's. I think it's. Can be very scary, pregnancy. And also from a guy point of view, there's no control whatsoever.

[Katherine Ryan]

But you're married and you want. You've wanted to have kids for a while.

[Jamie Laing]

Yeah. But it was still a moment where it's like, wow, I wasn't expecting that. It's like, oh, my God. Okay, this happening and it's your body and I want you to be okay and yada, yada, yada, and all these different things. So it was a little bit scary. So I walked out. But then she wasn't pregnant, so we had a little party.

[Katherine Ryan]

So he came back and paid the bill. I can see that. It's. Yeah, it's. It's a huge shift. You don't even know. You're being all cute about it. Like, we're having a baby.

[Jamie Laing]

I know.

[Katherine Ryan]

Yeah. You wait.

[Jamie Laing]

Just. Just give me. Give me the lowdown on it because when you had your first baby. Yeah. Expected, it was.

[Katherine Ryan]

Yes.

[Jamie Laing]

Nervous.

[Katherine Ryan]

No. I was 24. I knew I was in the wrong relationship, which was annoying. I got Diagnosed with lupus, which is an autoimmune disease that makes your body attack healthy cells and organs. And when I. When you first get diagnosed with lupus, you Google it, and it looks really bad. Like, it looks like you could die. Selena Gomez had a kidney transplant.

[Jamie Laing]

Yeah.

[Katherine Ryan]

There are a few celebrity lupus people. And I was like, oh, my gosh. There was no Selena Gomez back then.

[Jamie Laing]

Okay, so who were you?

[Katherine Ryan]

Who was not born Seal. I was like, seal. Who should I think be more famous in this country? He's British, but he's more celebrated in America.

[Jamie Laing]

I love Seal.

[Katherine Ryan]

I love Seal.

[Jamie Laing]

I love Seal.

[Katherine Ryan]

He's a lovely guy.

[Jamie Laing]

Yeah. Have you met him?

[Katherine Ryan]

Yes. What? Yes.

[Jamie Laing]

Because of a lupus meeting.

[Katherine Ryan]

We had a Lupus meetup. We did some. The one show together, and then also we did a corporate gig together where he was performing. And, you know, he did not want to record Kiss from a Rose, the song that made him a. Because it wasn't his favorite song at the time. And it was a Batman franchise thing. You know, they. I don't know if it was already attached to Batman, but he just was like, I don't know about this song. I don't believe in it. And then, like, Kiss from the Rose and the huge.

[Jamie Laing]

So you did. So that one show. Did you say. Was that the first time?

[Katherine Ryan]

Yeah.

[Jamie Laing]

Did you say to him, I also.

[Katherine Ryan]

Yes, I did. Well, you know, the one show, they like a bit of whiplash on the one show, they were like, let's talk about your projects and autoimmune disease. And so then one of the things about lupus is fertility. They go, you might never have kids. And so I just thought, oh, I better have Violet straight away. So then I was trying. She seems unplanned. Like it was a bad idea. I was poor and with a man who turned out to be a real wildcat.

[Jamie Laing]

Was this the one that. I know we spoke about the other one, but this is the. Your partner, who's also the bodyguard, Was. No, not the security man. No.

[Katherine Ryan]

No, he's dead. He's long dead. Jamie. When my current husband and I split up in high school, yes, I was forced to. To maintain my own dignity, to sleep with the prom security guard who was 31. And that's like a complex set of decisions that I can't get into right now. But it worked. I got my husband back, didn't I? He's jealous. I play a long game full of self harm. So when I had Violet, that was with someone else, someone totally random.

[Jamie Laing]

Who was that?

[Katherine Ryan]

You don't know him. You'll never know him. He's. He, like. He just lives in another country now. He's not really being. They text, do they? And he's kind.

[Jamie Laing]

Okay.

[Katherine Ryan]

But real, like, not what I would choose if I had a. I did have a choice, I suppose, but, you know, isn't, like, materially important, has never contributed financially, doesn't make sacrifices that I think.

[Jamie Laing]

And do you have anything?

[Katherine Ryan]

Nope.

[Jamie Laing]

Wow. So you don't expect. And so it doesn't bother you, because I've learned this in life, actually. As soon as you're, like. As soon as you expect stuff, that's when you always are disappointed. Just never really expect things to happen, and you just kind of allow it to happen.

[Katherine Ryan]

That's it. And I think I learned very early, and it was a beautiful lesson for me, actually, that I can't control other people, and I shouldn't try to. And when I had nothing, I realized I had everything already. And if I try to make it, manipulate people into doing what I think is right, then that's. Even if I have good intentions. That's a form of almost narcissistic behavior.

[Jamie Laing]

That's quite. So when you had nothing, you realized you had everything? What do you mean?

[Katherine Ryan]

Well, when I was very young and had Violet, and I felt really insecure with my career and financially and all My family was 3,000 miles away. I was here. Violet was born here. Then that relationship dissolved. And I was fearful, like, literally fearful for my life for a while, just to be like, oh, my God. Because I have this idea about men that still persists in my material where I kind of think that they're killers. I say, men are nature's gun. You're statistically most likely to be killed by the one in your house. And the, like, facts back it up. So how am I supposed to climb down from that ledge when, like, there's Netflix documentary after Netflix documentary proving me right all the time? So I didn't feel like I could really break up. And then when I broke up with him, I wasn't sure how he was gonna react. And then.

[Jamie Laing]

Are you were scared?

[Katherine Ryan]

I was really scared. And then I thought I would lose my daughter somehow. Like, I just felt very vulnerable and very threatened all around.

[Jamie Laing]

And you're how old?

[Katherine Ryan]

25, 26?

[Jamie Laing]

You're so young.

[Katherine Ryan]

Yeah.

[Jamie Laing]

And you think you're older than you are then for sure, you think, you know. And looking back at me at 20, you just, you know, nothing. I knew nothing.

[Katherine Ryan]

And especially to be, like, paycheck to paycheck in this country. I'm glad I experienced that. I know how scary it is. And you just go, what can happen? I don't even own this baby. The council owns this baby. As far as I'm concerned, I don't know what they can do. What can happen? Like, I have to make a life for us somehow. And I realized pretty quickly I was gonna be the one who would do that. I wasn't obviously gonna get help from anywhere. And then I just. Instead of being fearful all the time and anxious, I was like, well, she's healthy and she's safe. And I decided in that moment, that's all that matters and we don't need.

[Jamie Laing]

Wow.

[Katherine Ryan]

Yeah.

[Jamie Laing]

And then that's quite a freeing moment.

[Katherine Ryan]

It was.

[Jamie Laing]

That's cool.

[Katherine Ryan]

But what happened was as soon as I lent into gratitude.

[Jamie Laing]

Yeah.

[Katherine Ryan]

And I had this mindset of abundance, I was like, I have everything. I have mental health, which I always did.

[Jamie Laing]

Yeah.

[Katherine Ryan]

I have, like, youth on my side. I have this beautiful, healthy child. Not everybody has that. She's safe, I'm safe. I have everything. Then all of these things and opportunities started coming into my life.

[Jamie Laing]

Do you know what? I'm not even kidding. I say this the whole time, but I've started praying every night and every morning, and I don't know who I'm praying to. I'm not really religious, but I just give thanks. I thank for everything that's in my life. And I always thank you that Sophie and our unborn baby are happy, healthy, and content. And when I started doing that, things sort of fall into place a bit better.

[Katherine Ryan]

Yeah.

[Jamie Laing]

I don't know if that. Like, I don't even know if I believe in that, but it feels like I am now believing it.

[Katherine Ryan]

It's, I think, a form of manifesting. I think that you can attract things into your life. And it's hard for you to give people that advice because they will turn around in this country and say, it's easy for you to be grateful, blah, blah, blah. But when I was really on the breadline, that I discovered that same gratitude. And it does work for. You know, it's better than not having it.

[Jamie Laing]

Yeah. When you're on the breadline.

[Katherine Ryan]

Yeah.

[Jamie Laing]

And you are going from paycheck to paycheck. That is a really pretty scary time.

[Katherine Ryan]

Yeah.

[Jamie Laing]

Because you don't know how you're going to eat. You don't know how you're going to pay your rent. You don't know how you're going to do. That's that you're just Pure survival, really.

[Katherine Ryan]

But I always had faith that I would figure it out. And I always did just figure it out. But it was never a place of comfort. I could never, like, kick back. I was always hustling, which again, was good at 25, 26. But no, there was never a place of financial security. I was always like, I was such a good accountant at that time. Now I have no idea what my ingoings and outgoings are. I just don't know. But the MX bell comes in. I'm like, well. But then I was like, meticulous over everything. That was good.

[Jamie Laing]

What makes a great parent, honestly, in your opinion? Because you've gone from being a single mom to then being in a relationship and having to manage that. Because the thing that keeps. I keep saying to Sophie, it's going to be great. We're going to do this together. And she keeps saying, no, no, no. This is going to be a lot for us and we may not be the same, but we'll find our way back to it. I'm like, what, are you kidding me? That feels like a lot to handle.

[Katherine Ryan]

Yeah.

[Jamie Laing]

So. So give it to me. So. So how do you navigate parenthood?

[Katherine Ryan]

I don't know what makes a great partner? This is my first time parenting with a partner, and Bobby and I do fall out slightly. Not really. Like, we really get along quite well. But we do have resentment back and forth. We do keep score back and forth sometimes, which is annoying.

[Jamie Laing]

Yeah, that's a bad thing.

[Katherine Ryan]

Because as a single mother, you don't have to keep score with anyone because you just know it's all you. But it's very difficult, just as a mammal, not to notice when, like, one monkey's getting more treats than you got and you're working hard. They've done like actual lab studies about this. So when you're really tired and the other person you think is not doing exactly what you're doing, there is friction and you have no one but each other to offload on because your adversary is a baby.

[Jamie Laing]

It's a lot, isn't it?

[Katherine Ryan]

It's fine. It's fine. It is fine. Like, we're fine. We have almost four kids now, and it's okay.

[Jamie Laing]

Man, that is like a lot.

[Katherine Ryan]

But we have perspective and we have empathy and we have patience. And I've always treated my kids from birth like people, not babies. So I think a lot of them so important.

[Jamie Laing]

You gotta do that.

[Katherine Ryan]

Yeah.

[Jamie Laing]

Don't talk to them like babies. Talk to them like humans.

[Katherine Ryan]

Yeah. And I think a lot about their Own autonomy. Like that's why I potty train them really young, but because I thought I wouldn't want to go to the bathroom in my nappy. Like friends don't let friends shit themselves at lunch. It's my motto.

[Jamie Laing]

What age did you potty train at?

[Katherine Ryan]

3 months I started. Yeah.

[Jamie Laing]

Are you serious?

[Katherine Ryan]

All my kids are potty trained under a year old. Fully no nappies.

[Jamie Laing]

That is wild.

[Katherine Ryan]

I know it's not though.

[Jamie Laing]

Like most I was like, there's a video of me at like 4 and I'm like, that doesn't surprise me. Strapped. They had to strap me to a potty.

[Katherine Ryan]

But you know why? Is because in western culture, post industrial revolution, whatever, and like women started going out to work. We had to put children in institutions like daycares and we couldn't look at them as much as we used to. And nappies became a necessity for capitalism. And most of the world look at their kids and spend time with their kids and they kids do want to be clean. And if you wait until they're 18 months to potty train them or whatever most people are doing here, then that is a child who's really stubborn. And that child goes, actually I've already been trained to go in my nappy and I'm gonna keep doing that.

[Jamie Laing]

You're right.

[Katherine Ryan]

And that's why it's hard to potty train them. But if they never know a life with the nappy. So my kids always had a nappy, but it was a fail safe. I was not training them to go in the nappy. I would often take it off and just put them on the potty and read them a story. When they woke up, I would take it off, put them on the potty, hold them if they can't sit up themselves by six months. Especially when they start solids, you can tell when they need the loo. You read them a story, they go to the bathroom and then you don't put the nappy on for like 40 minutes and they get the feeling of being not in a nappy.

[Jamie Laing]

This is insane. I love this.

[Katherine Ryan]

It works. It actually works. I thought my first daughter was a genius and then my son was potty trained before. A year? Yeah, a boy. And I thought, okay, this just works. And then my daughter that I had after Fred Fena, she was potty trained under a year. She was probably like 10 months potty trained. And I just said, oh, it just works. It does.

[Jamie Laing]

Can I ask a terrible question? And I'm going to ask this because I don't know how this is going to lack. I'm just going to try and say it and I try to navigate it in the right way and you just tell me how wrong it is. Do you think it's easier as a woman to talk about a everything and anything than it is for a man to do it, or is it the opposite way around?

[Katherine Ryan]

I don't know. That's not a terrible question. I certainly think. Well, because it's both. Because if you are a woman doing any kind of comedy, then there are adjectives used to describe you that they wouldn't use to describe a man.

[Jamie Laing]

Agreed.

[Katherine Ryan]

They'll call you. Yeah. They'll say you're vulgar or crass or caustic or anytime I speak, it'll be like, Katherine Ryan slams this Katherine Ryan. Meh. Like, they use quite aggressive language with us where, you know, you wouldn't be like, oh, Jimmy Carr is so crass. And people have asked me in interviews like, well, how are you gonna explain to your children? You know, when they look at your material and they see what a dirty mouth you have? I'm like, is anyone asking Frankie Boyle?

[Jamie Laing]

So.

[Katherine Ryan]

So, yeah. In a way, though, I get what you're saying about women, because for me, a lot of comedy is about surprise.

[Jamie Laing]

Yeah.

[Katherine Ryan]

Which is why.

[Jamie Laing]

Give me an example of that. What do you mean? So, like, I mean, that's hard off the top of your head. I know.

[Katherine Ryan]

Well, I just think the pullback and reveal of a punchline, it might be. Well, it's hopefully not what the audience are expecting you to say. They shouldn't be able to finish your joke for you. It also should maybe have a juxtaposition to what you look like.

[Jamie Laing]

Yes.

[Katherine Ryan]

And sometimes the surprise is that it's shocking and they wouldn't expect it to come from you.

[Jamie Laing]

You've also spoken the industry and, like, how toxic it has been in certain people. Right. Was that nerve wracking to talk about it?

[Katherine Ryan]

I didn't think anyone would care because I was speaking about. So culture again moves so quickly that all I can do is give my perspective from my experience. I spoke about my experience with someone whom I was not abused by, but I believe very strongly has been an open secret in our industry as someone who is predatory. And no one's ever cared. Everybody's always spoken about it. People know, or people allegedly, like, feel that they know and no one's ever cared. So I thought, well, if I talk about it now, I didn't say his name and that no one's gonna care. And then all of a Sudden just the time. The timing of culture, where it isn't it. Everybody cared. All of a sudden they were like, who, Catherine? Who? I was like, what do you mean, who? Everybody knows who. Everybody's always known who. Why do you care? Now that I've said it, I was. I was describing an event that happened eight years ago. Anyway, no one's cared that whole time. And that event was very public. I was in front of loads of people just basically being a dick to the sky for fun, and no one cared. And then all of a sudden, everyone did care. So I think that is also what confuses some of these predatory men as they go, what everyone was doing was fine. Now you're mad. Especially the really older ones who, like, would grab ass at the office Christmas party and they're like, what's wrong with that? Now, not in my, you know.

[Jamie Laing]

No, but I know what you mean.

[Katherine Ryan]

I mean, I probably had my ass grabbed. Probably. I've been to the Playboy Mansion. I worked at Hooters. It's probably happened. But it was a different time, Jamie. It didn't bother me.

[Jamie Laing]

But I also think, like, yeah, so, okay, because you're such, like, an open book with so many things, what does upset you?

[Katherine Ryan]

Oh, I do get upset about.

[Jamie Laing]

Genuinely upset. What actually genuinely upsets you?

[Katherine Ryan]

There's a song on Sesame street that Will I Am sings, and I can't even listen to it. And you wait until your baby is born.

[Jamie Laing]

What is it?

[Katherine Ryan]

It's awful. So he. Well, when you have the baby, you'll be very emotional. Anyway. Yeah, and it's Will I Am, you know, and Sesame Street. If you know the backstory, tell me the backstory. Like puppeteers making one of the first educational shows for the latchkey kid generation. Because these children were kind of home after school, and instead of just, you know, Roadrunner and Coyote killing each other, they were like, let's make television that enriches their lives and makes them feel special and teaches them letters and educates them. So it's really like high value tv. And then I thought about kids who aren't told that they're special and why this song has to exist. And Will I Am goes, what I am is what's in me. I'll be strong. That's who I'll be. And I will always be the best me that I can be. There's only one me I emit have a dream. I'll follow it. It's up to me to try. And then all the other Muppets are in it.

[Jamie Laing]

Oh, get out of here.

[Katherine Ryan]

And they're like, sounds great.

[Jamie Laing]

It's funny. It's will I am.

[Katherine Ryan]

Yeah. And then they say nice things. He goes, yeah. There's, like, an interlude. What is the part that really makes me cry?

[Jamie Laing]

Oh, this upsets you and makes you cry?

[Katherine Ryan]

Special. Yeah. What I am is musical. What I am is strong. And the Muppets are bouncing out. What I am is brave. What I am is special.

[Jamie Laing]

And you cry at this.

[Katherine Ryan]

I always do. And then he goes, there's nothing I can't achieve because of myself. I believe in. No. And I just. If I actually see them up, it's doing it. I'm getting slightly upset now.

[Jamie Laing]

I can see. Yeah.

[Katherine Ryan]

I just feel like I watch that song and Will I Am has to. Has to give these affirmations to kids and be like, what I am is brave. Because no one's telling them that. And so they have to get it from Sesame Street. And then they listen at home, and they're all alone on the floor watching Sesame street after school because their parents are, like, scoring crack. I don't know. And they're like, I can do it. And that really moves me a lot. And then, of course, world issues.

[Jamie Laing]

Oh, yeah.

[Katherine Ryan]

Which is why I don't talk about them, because I don't know how to find the light in that dark.

[Jamie Laing]

Okay, talk to me about this, because this is one thing. And we spoke this last time you were on. But the whole intimacy.

[Katherine Ryan]

Oh, yes, yes, yes. I've gotten better at that. Obviously, you're struggling, because during.

[Jamie Laing]

I think during pregnancy, sex is off the cards. And last time we spoke about the fact that Sophie was, like, resistant to it. So when we were. You know. This is where I get awkward.

[Katherine Ryan]

It's okay. I already know this because I follow your journey. Your wife doesn't want to have sex.

[Jamie Laing]

So does that always happen in relationships, leading when someone feels pregnant?

[Katherine Ryan]

No. I don't know.

[Jamie Laing]

Okay.

[Katherine Ryan]

I think it ebbs and flows. Anyway. How long have you been together now? Total?

[Jamie Laing]

Six years.

[Katherine Ryan]

Like, how often do you want to be having sex?

[Jamie Laing]

Not that often.

[Katherine Ryan]

How often, please?

[Jamie Laing]

Well, I could. I could do it all the time.

[Katherine Ryan]

All the time?

[Jamie Laing]

Yeah.

[Katherine Ryan]

Even all the time?

[Jamie Laing]

Not all the time.

[Katherine Ryan]

Okay. Because you kind of have a business.

[Jamie Laing]

I shouldn't do it all the time, but, like, once a week, Twice a week.

[Katherine Ryan]

You should at least be doing it twice a week, I think.

[Jamie Laing]

Wow.

[Katherine Ryan]

Is the national advice, get out of here? Yeah. Because twice a week. Well, when we were really up against it and the kids were very small, and I was touring and Working. And we were doing it twice a month.

[Jamie Laing]

Yeah.

[Katherine Ryan]

And I only knew that because I always log it just out of habit.

[Jamie Laing]

No, you don't.

[Katherine Ryan]

Yeah. Because we were all.

[Jamie Laing]

You log it. So wait, sorry, you put it in a little, like, book. You. You write or just a little tick.

[Katherine Ryan]

It's an app.

[Jamie Laing]

Oh, okay.

[Katherine Ryan]

And it's my, like, trying to conceive, apparently. So that's why I got in the habit of logging it when we were trying to have Fred. And then throughout our marriage, we've never not been trying to conceive. So I put it in. And that way, every time I get pregnant, I kind of can backtrack my data and I know when I got pregnant, but we don't schedule it or we just retroactively log it as force of habit. I like data. I don't know what to tell you. And actually, I will say it's good for the marriage because I look back and I go, oh, we had sex six times this month. We had sex five. We have sex about five or six times now. A month. Month. Which is a. I think you're a stud. I know that.

[Jamie Laing]

That is freaking unbelievable. That is unbelievable. With kids in it.

[Katherine Ryan]

Well, but it used to be, like, twice a month, so it got low.

[Jamie Laing]

Yeah. That's because you were touring.

[Katherine Ryan]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Jamie Laing]

What?

[Katherine Ryan]

I do think it is important to make an effort. I think that you're meant to have three kinds of sex. This is through everything I've heard and read and.

[Jamie Laing]

Okay, give it to me.

[Katherine Ryan]

I think you are supposed to have scheduled sex, which is not the most exciting one. But when your lives get busy and when you have children, sometimes you do have to go, look, there's a gap here. We should, like, meet up and have sex. You should have spontaneous sex as well. And then I forget what the other one was. But you can look that up for yourself. I don't know. I'm quite busy, Jamie. I have sex six times a month. Okay. But, yeah, you have to keep doing, because the longer you leave it, like, I hear women. Since I've spoken quite openly about our sex life, people reach out to me.

[Jamie Laing]

And they'll be like, what do they say?

[Katherine Ryan]

Oh, my God. Some people think it's disgusting. Like, I have to fuck my wife every day or I will explode.

[Jamie Laing]

I'm like, okay, that's not. That can't be real.

[Katherine Ryan]

It is real for some people, and that's fine. It's about being compatible.

[Jamie Laing]

Who is that person who has to do that?

[Katherine Ryan]

I don't know. Men with some type of like enlarged prostate. I don't know. And then I have heard from women mostly, who will say, I haven't had sex in 11 months since I had my baby. I haven't had sex at all. And then I go, that's really bad. It is. Because you don't want to. I think the longer you go without it, the longer you can go without it. And even if you're tired or even if you're busy, I think if you. Oh, yeah. The third type was quickies.

[Jamie Laing]

Quickies are great.

[Katherine Ryan]

Cookies are all we do.

[Jamie Laing]

Yeah.

[Katherine Ryan]

Be very honest with you.

[Jamie Laing]

That's it. That's a. It's a. It's easy.

[Katherine Ryan]

And if it. Once it's done, you go, thank God we did that. It's important. Yes. Sophie. I'm on her side just because of my commitment to my gender, but she, I think, would be happier because don't you feel like if you haven't had sex, you're in a fight?

[Jamie Laing]

Yeah. You need the release.

[Katherine Ryan]

I think you do have to be having sex.

[Jamie Laing]

But I tell you what pregnancy with Sophie has taught me, and I've said this before, has taught me patience. I become way more patient.

[Katherine Ryan]

Okay.

[Jamie Laing]

Like, because it's something that I'm using you like my therapist. But it's true. You. You. Because you realize that whatever your wife, your partner, whoever your is, is going through pregnancy, you realize how insane it is and how, like, their body is changing and that hormones are changing and so much is going on. And so you kind of. What you do is you. You sort of give them a sort of hall pass to everything.

[Katherine Ryan]

You're.

[Jamie Laing]

You're feeling tarte. Totally fine. You're feeling like this, totally fine. And then you realize that actually being that way in life, being much more. What I used to do in relationships. Right. Here we go. Is I would be a. I would reflect. So if you were angry at me, I'd be angry. If you were happy, I'd be happy. I'd allow your emotions to affect my emotions.

[Katherine Ryan]

Yeah.

[Jamie Laing]

And now because of pregnancy, I don't do that at all. And I've learned that you don't have to reflect emotions.

[Katherine Ryan]

So you were, like, backing out of what Sounds like it used to be codependency. Yeah.

[Jamie Laing]

You think that's what it is?

[Katherine Ryan]

It sounds codependent to mirror someone's emotions and to. To make it about you. Look, I'm only happy if you're happy. And if you're cross, I'm cross with you. It's a codependent relationship, but that's okay, I'm codependent. I'm pretty codependent too. You have to be aware of can be a fun thing. But you sound like really nice husband and a really good partner.

[Jamie Laing]

No, I think I am. It's great. And I'm very excited to become a dad. I'm like beyond excited.

[Katherine Ryan]

I know you are and I'm really excited for you.

[Jamie Laing]

I'm beyond excited.

[Katherine Ryan]

If you knew the gender, which you don't have to tell. You're not telling people.

[Jamie Laing]

What do you think it is?

[Katherine Ryan]

I. I know what it is, but.

[Jamie Laing]

We'Re not telling anyone.

[Katherine Ryan]

But you do know.

[Jamie Laing]

But I do know.

[Katherine Ryan]

Oh, it's kind of fun not to know. Maybe next time don't find out.

[Jamie Laing]

Okay. And I wanted to go down this route of like not knowing. And the reason Sophie, you just really wanted to. I said absolutely fine. But I think the next one is quite fun because then you have this whole surprise when you don't really know.

[Katherine Ryan]

It's really fun. We never know. I don't know. Now I feel like it's a boy just because I'm a fucking mutant walrus. And that's my pattern with boys. I just get like fat and I get pregnant in the face with Fred, I gained four stone all in my neck. For some reason I was pregnant in my throat like a tropical frog.

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[Jamie Laing]

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[Katherine Ryan]

Do I.

[Jamie Laing]

Am you do your reality show?

[Katherine Ryan]

Yes.

[Jamie Laing]

Is it intrusive?

[Katherine Ryan]

Yes.

[Jamie Laing]

You know, we. We're doing a really.

[Katherine Ryan]

Yeah, it's intrusive.

[Jamie Laing]

I've done a reality before, but it's different style when it's just on you.

[Katherine Ryan]

Is this one more intrusive than what you've done before?

[Jamie Laing]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Katherine Ryan]

They're with you. So our schedule was what? The only criticism I would have of. Of our reality show that I would tweak is. Is there was stopping and starting and cameras, like, visibly around, and they'd. It was very true to what was happening, but they would take us out and go, how do you feel about that? You know how they do it? And I think going into it, I assumed that it would be a lot more fly on the wall, like just kind of Big Brother. Like, I'd be fine with cameras kind of just everywhere. I think you'd get the best of us, certainly my children.

[Jamie Laing]

Yes.

[Katherine Ryan]

If you didn't have, like a boom and they kept kicking my cat out and they'd be like. Or like. They go, she's making noise so she has to leave. I'd be like, well, she lives here.

[Jamie Laing]

You finally.

[Katherine Ryan]

Yeah. And they'd go, could you get Fred to come in and say that again? I'd go, no, he's 2 years old. I don't think we can get that again from Fred. You try to give him notes. He's an asshole. Good luck. Wait, wait. Are you going to film the birthday?

[Jamie Laing]

No. I don't know. No, I'm not gonna film the birth. The cameras aren't gonna be in. I don't know. Camera's not gonna be in the birth. We. We can film it. If we wanted to film it. We have a choice. But it's a lot. Because pregnancy is a lot. Then throw cameras into it. It's a lot.

[Katherine Ryan]

It's a lot.

[Jamie Laing]

It's a lot.

[Katherine Ryan]

Oh, well, it's cool. I think I look forward to watching your show on Disney. But this is what's making Sophie. This is what's putting her off the sex. There are cameras in your house, Jamie. This is why she doesn't want. She's not on Onlyfans. If you want to fuck your wife, send the cameras home. I think she's not that kind of girl.

[Jamie Laing]

Okay. Do you have any advice before you go about pregnancy, about all of that? What Do I do. What do I say? How do I act? Do I just rub the back and say it's all going to be okay?

[Katherine Ryan]

I don't know.

[Jamie Laing]

That's not very good, is it?

[Katherine Ryan]

No one's ever really been that supportive to me.

[Jamie Laing]

Bobby's not really. Are you serious?

[Katherine Ryan]

Yeah, he's fine, but he's quite laid back.

[Jamie Laing]

Bobby as well.

[Katherine Ryan]

He's laid back and I'm extremely hyper competent, so I don't complain. I don't ask for much. I do like foot massages. I love that. But he. I don't get many of them.

[Jamie Laing]

I don't want to sit with. So does Sophie.

[Katherine Ryan]

Yeah. Because your legs and your feet, really, you could do that.

[Jamie Laing]

Okay.

[Katherine Ryan]

I don't know. Just don't complain about your own. You know, Bobby hurt his back golfing the other day.

[Jamie Laing]

Oh, yeah.

[Katherine Ryan]

And he was like. And I was like, all right.

[Jamie Laing]

But, you know, I was a bit sick the other day and I was like. And she was like, shut up.

[Katherine Ryan]

I think that you're having a harder time than Bobby because Sophie's prettier than I am.

[Jamie Laing]

No, she's not.

[Katherine Ryan]

So you just have to allow it. Like, it's your choice to have a hot wife. That's on you, you know.

[Jamie Laing]

The dhl. Is it dhl? Yeah, the DHL guy came to my door the other day and I came back as Sophie was at the door and he was handing it to her. Anyway, as I. I went, oh, don't worry, Sonyate. So I took the package and he went to me. He turned to me and said, who do you think's punching out of you and your wife?

[Katherine Ryan]

Yeah.

[Jamie Laing]

I went, what? And he went, who do you think it is? And then just walked off like it was some sort of statement, really.

[Katherine Ryan]

Excuse me, delivery man. Let me just get a bank statement.

[Jamie Laing]

Doing comedy now, do you still have that same buzz, that same excitement, that same, like, oh, my God, when you go on stage that you did when you were first doing it, or is it a different kind of buzz?

[Katherine Ryan]

It's different. And my tour promoter, Ian Coburn at Live Nation, he said to me, he was driving me from a show once, maybe 2015, and he said, you should remember this feeling because it only happens once, this ascension. It's really exciting and you're gonna do new things and it's so magical. And then you kind of plateau almost for the rest of your career and you might have other little bumps, you know, like it ebbs and flows, but it's never, ever gonna be as exciting as it is now. And I thought, oh, no, I'll always be really excited. And then he was right. And I. But I held on. Yeah, it was nice. Like when I did Conan o' Brien in America or when I did the James Corden show. Like those American chat shows, being behind the curtain and then the dry ice comes and you're like, those are quite scary experiences.

[Jamie Laing]

And you do feel sparkly.

[Katherine Ryan]

Yeah, yeah, I like to feel. Because I don't feel much otherwise, I'm very even. So you only get that dopamine maybe once or twice. And then you're like, oh, yeah. And I still feel very. I still feel very grateful and excited and I enjoy what I do and I take it always very seriously. And there is a buzz that I still get, but it's not like, shit your pants like it used to be. And I miss that feeling.

[Jamie Laing]

If you did snl.

[Katherine Ryan]

If I did.

[Jamie Laing]

Have you done snl?

[Katherine Ryan]

No.

[Jamie Laing]

You would be amazing. No, but if you did snl, would that be nerve wracking?

[Katherine Ryan]

Yeah, because I'd be like, I'm not a sketch comic. I'm not an improv comic, and I'm also not Travis Kelce. Like, to do SNL in America, you have to be, you know, like a huge star to host it, or a sketch comedy. And they're good at their own thing. I can't do improv. Like, I can't do characters. And you'll see, even in the project that I'm doing with you, Write Me Dirty with your company, rather, anytime props were involved or I had to be a bit of an actress, I was fucking livid.

[Jamie Laing]

Let's talk about Write Me Dirty.

[Katherine Ryan]

Yeah.

[Jamie Laing]

So this is the show that you're doing so kindly for Jampot, our company, which is an erotic fiction show, which sounds quite weird, right? But you can describe it.

[Katherine Ryan]

So I know that we tell people a lot about the erotic side of it, but for me, the intrigue outside of working with you, for you, rather, no.

[Jamie Laing]

Which I'm very confident. I can only ever think that I'm working for you, obviously.

[Katherine Ryan]

No, I wouldn't have done it if my agent was like, sam Thompson would like for you to come in and execute his idea. I would not do that. No offense. Like, I don't have a problem with him. I don't know why that's the name that popped into my head.

[Jamie Laing]

We can bleep it, use it.

[Katherine Ryan]

It's better that he knows now I'm not going to collaborate with him.

[Jamie Laing]

So I did hear that he was going.

[Katherine Ryan]

I am. I am very Fond of you and I love it.

[Jamie Laing]

But why did you say yes? Because I want to give the birth of it. I phoned you up and I said, I have this idea for a show which. About erotic fiction where I really would love you to host it, where we get your comedian friends on to write erotic fiction about each other and read it to each other. And I was expecting you to say no. Oh, was I? Actually, I actually wasn't. I was expecting us to have a debate over it, but you very kindly said, oh, no. I actually don't mind this idea. And you are very busy. You are asked to do everything. You're hosting the new Real Housewives.

[Katherine Ryan]

Oh, yeah.

[Jamie Laing]

Which we gotta get. I can't wait. You are going to knock that out the park.

[Katherine Ryan]

I'm excited.

[Jamie Laing]

I'm so excited for you for that, which is amazing, but you got so much on. So why did you say yes to me?

[Katherine Ryan]

Well, I said because I really like you. But then I did think the best demonstration of, like, who comedians are and I think the best lens to see how funny they are is when they're off foot.

[Jamie Laing]

Yeah.

[Katherine Ryan]

So people really enjoy Taskmaster because it's comedians not really doing standup. They're out of their comfort zone. And people really liked LOL on Amazon prime because it was comedians off stage being themselves. And I think comedian.

[Jamie Laing]

Are you in the next series?

[Katherine Ryan]

No, I'm not allowed. I don't think because I'm not British. It's a weird thing.

[Jamie Laing]

What is that rule?

[Katherine Ryan]

They're all British. Sorry.

[Jamie Laing]

That's the weirdest rule I've ever heard.

[Katherine Ryan]

You voted Brexit, not me.

[Jamie Laing]

Oh, my God. What?

[Katherine Ryan]

Well, okay.

[Jamie Laing]

Will you be amazing?

[Katherine Ryan]

Yeah. So I loved the idea because comedians are weirdly prudish. We'll talk about sex if we have a punchline and we're ready to talk about it. But I thought this will be so destabilizing and awkward for the comedians to face one another and have to read aloud the erotic fiction that they have composed about their opposite subject. I thought they were going to be so, so off foot with that, that it's going to be hilarious. And I couldn't wait to be part of that, because that is when you get comedians at their best and they're so funny.

[Jamie Laing]

And you know what? You're so right. And the thing for me is this, is that I grew up right on, like, 8 out of 8 out of 10 cats and, like, Mock the Week and these amazing, like, comedy shows that I just loved more than anything. And slowly by slowly just because of the landscape. Those have disappeared because there's no funding. Shows have changed, there's. TV is in a tricky place. And so I'm desperate to kind of bring that sort of comedy shows back to the sphere and allow people to see comedians doing funny things. Because we don't get to see comedians. You have to either go to a show or you have to see a stand up special or you have to see you on a podcast. You can't see comedians being comedians.

[Katherine Ryan]

Yeah.

[Jamie Laing]

And this is that show that kind of does it. I feel.

[Katherine Ryan]

They're so funny because they're so funny. They can't help it. And you don't also see them writing erotic fiction. I mean, it's a real fish out of water thing for comedians. But they managed to make it so authentic to their own style. We've had people really go for the filth.

[Jamie Laing]

Do they really? Who went for the real filth?

[Katherine Ryan]

Felicity Ward has got a real future, I think in erotic fiction. Some of them are very kinky in their real lives and they're happy to talk about that. You have loads of sexual orientations and genders and. And I try not to judge. There are people who, who really go there and then people who really don't. But it's still funny and they're so embarrassed. It's just great. It's a new side to everyone's favorite comedians. I love it.

[Jamie Laing]

It's very. And also the idea is, it's like this is. These type of shows need to happen more.

[Katherine Ryan]

Yeah.

[Jamie Laing]

We like a hundred percent. We need to bring that kind of like fun entertainment shows back to tv, back to this landscape. We got to make it happen. And people say with. With lol. With last one laughing. That's a prime example that there's an appetite.

[Katherine Ryan]

Yeah.

[Jamie Laing]

You know what I mean? There's a total appetite for watching funny people do funny things. So why aren't we creating more of that?

[Katherine Ryan]

I think they're trying to. I think commissioners really were shaken up by the success of Last One Laughing on Amazon. They really were. They were like, oh, hang on. We still need to invest in comedy because that people really do need that release now. And this is two kinds of release. Wanking and laughing and crying. Three kinds of release.

[Jamie Laing]

We're gonna leave the link to the description to link to the show in the show description. So go and check it out. Write me dirty.

[Katherine Ryan]

It is because it is sexy as well.

[Jamie Laing]

It's sexy and it's so funny. It's so good and you're. It's just it's honestly, I'm extremely proud. Like, it's just brilliant every single way. So I'm just so excited for people to listen to it.

[Katherine Ryan]

Your team have done a really talked.

[Jamie Laing]

About hosting the Real Housewives of London.

[Katherine Ryan]

Yeah.

[Jamie Laing]

Come on.

[Katherine Ryan]

Do you know a lot of these ladies?

[Jamie Laing]

I know none of these ladies. What? I don't know any of these ladies, but Sophie watches these shows.

[Katherine Ryan]

Yeah.

[Jamie Laing]

Like, it's on repeat.

[Katherine Ryan]

I'm a real fan of the Real Housewives franchise. Okay. And some cities hit better with me than others. There are so many that I haven't watched them all.

[Jamie Laing]

You like Atlanta?

[Katherine Ryan]

I like Atlanta. I fell off Atlanta a little bit. It became a bit love and hip hop for me, and I had that one as well. Yeah. I love.

[Jamie Laing]

And hip hop.

[Katherine Ryan]

Yeah. Where Cardi B was discovered.

[Jamie Laing]

Are you serious?

[Katherine Ryan]

Yes. Huh. And I love Real Housewives of Beverly Hills. I really liked the Orange county one for a time, but I am told by the producers and I've yet to see an episode yet, but they're like, london will blow people's socks off.

[Jamie Laing]

Get out of here.

[Katherine Ryan]

And they've purposely chosen. Yeah.

[Jamie Laing]

London.

[Katherine Ryan]

Well, yes. Because these women are very international. They have access to the world. They also have a huge amount of wealth, which is obviously important for the show, but they're unknown. I think they've cast it really well. A lot of people in the beginning when the cast was announced, they're like, we were expecting, like, famous London Housewives, but it's like, no, no. You want to break stars on these shows sometimes because they are so much more authentic if they're not media trained.

[Jamie Laing]

Yeah. Because then you get. Cause they don't know what they're doing almost. It's true, though. When you're not media trained, you kind of just go, like, well, I'm just gonna go into it like, it's just me, and I'm gonna just do and say whatever it is. As soon as someone comes media trained, they. They. You lose that kind of.

[Katherine Ryan]

It's the authenticity that Sophie and I are so.

[Jamie Laing]

You're so drawn to it.

[Katherine Ryan]

Yeah. And when you have like a off amount of money, you just like, here I am.

[Jamie Laing]

I don't give a. Yeah. Would you ever do it?

[Katherine Ryan]

Be a housewife? I don't know that I would qualify to be a housewife. I don't think I'm home enough.

[Jamie Laing]

Do you have to be. Do you have to be a home housewife to become a housewife?

[Katherine Ryan]

I think it has evolved, hasn't it?

[Jamie Laing]

I think it's evolved A lot of.

[Katherine Ryan]

Them have companies and they're really busy.

[Jamie Laing]

They all go to jail. Like, why is everyone in jail? Like one. I saw the guy was being arrested, like, on the show.

[Katherine Ryan]

That's right. I don't know. Would you guys ever do it? Because presumably you'll get to an age where I become. And it's also the only place you can see women over 40 and over 50 on primetime television like you. There aren't that many spaces for glamorous over 40s, over 50s women and housewives, is it?

[Jamie Laing]

You're the greatest. And you really are the greatest company.

[Katherine Ryan]

Is that what you're gonna call this episode?

[Jamie Laing]

Yeah. This is the greatest company. Oh, Kathy, you're the best. Is. I got eight questions to end on Quick fire. You ready for this?

[Katherine Ryan]

Yes.

[Jamie Laing]

What's a saying, a phrase that makes you smile or cheers you up?

[Katherine Ryan]

I like when Jimmy Carr says, never complain, never explain.

[Jamie Laing]

Love that. Best compliment anyone's ever given you.

[Katherine Ryan]

Someone in a comedy review called me tiny in2012. I was tiny. That's during the whole, like, split era. I was really.

[Jamie Laing]

Was that it?

[Katherine Ryan]

Yeah.

[Jamie Laing]

That's really good. Breakups, Kind of. This is the breakup.

[Katherine Ryan]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. It was the revenge body. Yeah. Yeah. 100.

[Jamie Laing]

What scares you most about yourself?

[Katherine Ryan]

Scares me about myself.

[Jamie Laing]

Yeah. Maybe nothing.

[Katherine Ryan]

Yeah. I think I do always move forward and I will just do. I will, like, act.

[Jamie Laing]

So you're a doer?

[Katherine Ryan]

I'm a doer. And sometimes I think I could take that too far. Like, you never know what I'm gonna do, but I'm gonna do something always. And usually that's just like, you know, order too many boxes. Yeah. I'll tell you what scares me about myself is I keep saying to Everybody, you watch 2026, you wait. Because I'm planning on getting plastic surgery, and I just don't know how far that's going to go because I'm done having babies after this one.

[Jamie Laing]

So that does plastic surgery.

[Katherine Ryan]

You going to have definitely a facelift. I wanted to go to the guy who did Kris Jenner, but he's very expensive now because everyone knows he did Kris Jenner.

[Jamie Laing]

How much does he cost?

[Katherine Ryan]

I had a consult with him. He said 175. And then everyone. Thousand US dollars.

[Jamie Laing]

Sorry. Okay. US$175,000 to have a facelift.

[Katherine Ryan]

Yeah, but it's that. It's the guy.

[Jamie Laing]

It's good. Okay. So Brad Pitt's gone there.

[Katherine Ryan]

Allegedly.

[Jamie Laing]

Allegedly.

[Katherine Ryan]

Then everyone found out about him doing Kris Jenner, and now it's 240 already. And I was like, please, I just have to have a baby. Can you wait? And his secretary's like, it's gonna be higher.

[Jamie Laing]

So he is 240,000.

[Katherine Ryan]

But I respect him because if you could do 150 facelifts a year or 75 facelifts a year for the same price, you're gonna do 75. And he's an artiste. Like, he is the best. You know what you're getting. So no, I'm probably not gonna go to him now. Unless you've got another podcast idea in the works.

[Jamie Laing]

Unless this one blows up, really smashes it. We can frickin go. Okay, I don't think you need a facelift. But also, by the way, I'm always about if people want to go and do it, I'm going to be like Michael Douglas when I pick my kids up. I'm going to be so stretched back, man, it's going to look great.

[Katherine Ryan]

Nobody needs a facelift. And I think that's the saving grace of my mental health, is that it's not like I look in the mirror every day and go, oh, no. I just think I'm done having babies. Wouldn't it be nice to have a facelift?

[Jamie Laing]

Yeah.

[Katherine Ryan]

Because it does take a lot out of you. I've been pregnant for five years.

[Jamie Laing]

When was the last time you cried?

[Katherine Ryan]

Almost now singing about Sesame Street. But overall, I don't really cry. What about you?

[Jamie Laing]

Oh, when I watch military people coming home to their families after.

[Katherine Ryan]

Mowing down innocent civilians, you know they've been tricked by their government to go there. And they will suffer a lifetime of unattended mental health issues.

[Jamie Laing]

That's what gets.

[Katherine Ryan]

But their dog's excited to see them. You're right.

[Jamie Laing]

What's something you can't let go of?

[Katherine Ryan]

Anything. Like, I remember. I've never taken classes. I remember everything in my life.

[Jamie Laing]

Not everything.

[Katherine Ryan]

Yeah, pretty much. And Bobby, any indiscretion, you remember it. I will never let go of it. And I'm not.

[Jamie Laing]

You hold it.

[Katherine Ryan]

I will. Forever. And I'm not cross about it. Day to day. But he cannot anticipate me forgetting anytime soon.

[Jamie Laing]

When's your birthday?

[Katherine Ryan]

June 30th. I'm cancer.

[Jamie Laing]

I'm cancer. Okay, again. It's like Sophie, she doesn't forget it, but holds on to remembers him.

[Katherine Ryan]

Yeah. And then like sometimes in therapy, they'll be like, just let that go. I'm like, oh, sorry, I haven't had, like, a traumatic brain injury. Like, I just remember and I'll hold on to It. I'm not mad about it. But he's there, and I get in trouble sometimes because people will go, do you trust your husband? I say, no, I don't. I love him, but I don't. I remember what he did to me when we were 16.

[Jamie Laing]

One of the best things you ever say, I always think, is how men can leave the house with the best intentions. What are you. What did you say? You say you can leave the house with best intentions and they can blow their lives up?

[Katherine Ryan]

Yeah. You're one stupid mistake away from exploding your whole lives every day. And I've seen it. A respectable husband and father leaves the house with good intentions, finishes the day on a bag of cocaine, face first in a sex worker's asshole. You want to tell me why that happens? We can't trust you guys. And even you're disappointed when it happens. The men are like, oh, no, I love my family. But it's like, you just go rogue sometimes. And I'm ready for that.

[Jamie Laing]

Oh, no, I love my family.

[Katherine Ryan]

Yeah. These guys. You know these guys. I know these guys. They're not happy about it. They love their wives.

[Jamie Laing]

They love. They're like, oh, my God.

[Katherine Ryan]

Yeah. Having a dick 20 years from now will qualify you for disability insurance.

[Jamie Laing]

What's your guilty pleasure?

[Katherine Ryan]

Real Housewives, of course.

[Jamie Laing]

What's your biggest turn off?

[Katherine Ryan]

Smoking, I think.

[Jamie Laing]

Yeah.

[Katherine Ryan]

And I know you smoked around Sophie recently at the wedding.

[Jamie Laing]

I had one cigarette. Okay, one. And it wasn't even near her.

[Katherine Ryan]

You tell that to your child with the iron lung. Bobby smoke.

[Jamie Laing]

I only had one.

[Katherine Ryan]

Bobby smoked seven or eight cigarettes every day. It's really, like, just not. It's not of, like, where I'm vibrating. You know what I mean? I think it's like, what do you.

[Jamie Laing]

Say to him when he does it?

[Katherine Ryan]

Nothing. I'm very easy to get along with.

[Jamie Laing]

Yeah, you are very easy to get along with.

[Katherine Ryan]

I will come here and slack him.

[Jamie Laing]

Off on a public forum, and you don't forget it. You don't forget that shit. What turns you on?

[Katherine Ryan]

Ooh, I don't know. I do like a sense of humor. Like, I think my husband is really, really, really funny.

[Jamie Laing]

He's so funny.

[Katherine Ryan]

And if he turns me on for a variety of reasons, he's, like, traditionally a hunk. He is a really good dad. He's really patient and gentle.

[Jamie Laing]

That is sexy as well.

[Katherine Ryan]

Yeah, it's really sexy. But historically, not all of the men I've dated have been even passable in terms of looks. But if they're funny, I do get turned on by them.

[Jamie Laing]

Wait, some of you that you dated weren't hot.

[Katherine Ryan]

I've not dated anyone. Like, traditionally, I had like one secret hot romance. But like really hot. Like famous hot. Hot like what? Like a hot guy.

[Jamie Laing]

Come on. Who?

[Katherine Ryan]

I can't tell you.

[Jamie Laing]

Get out of here.

[Katherine Ryan]

Because if I want to famous hot guys, Jamie, I have to be discreet. What?

[Jamie Laing]

You're not getting what?

[Katherine Ryan]

I can't.

[Jamie Laing]

Can I just say a couple names and you can just like.

[Katherine Ryan]

I'll say no. I'll say no because I want to a famous Hawkeye again. And they're smart if I start saying it.

[Jamie Laing]

When you were the famous hot guy, were you like, I'm fucking the famous hot guy?

[Katherine Ryan]

He wasn't that famous yet, but I knew he was hot. Like, I knew.

[Jamie Laing]

And he's still alive.

[Katherine Ryan]

Yes. Thanks.

[Jamie Laing]

I was thinking Gene Hackman.

[Katherine Ryan]

It was Gene Hackman. Yes. You got it in one. You got it in one.

[Jamie Laing]

I believe you shagged Gene Hackman.

[Katherine Ryan]

I know that's how he died. But everyone else, like, has been pretty ugly.

[Jamie Laing]

Why? Because you're so. You're hot.

[Katherine Ryan]

I know that I certainly was like, the uglier, the hotter I was. I was dating the ugliest.

[Jamie Laing]

Why is that?

[Katherine Ryan]

I don't know. I don't know. Bobby just happens to be very good looking. But that's not my usual.

[Jamie Laing]

Those guys must have been like, what the hell?

[Katherine Ryan]

Yeah, probably.

[Jamie Laing]

You made them very, very happy. Do you think they talk? Do you think they say, I used to hook up with Kevin?

[Katherine Ryan]

No. I'm friends with one of my ex boyfriends. We're very close friends. Everyone else was also like a psychotic narcissist and probably thinks I'm a monster. Like, they've spun it to be like, she left me and she. But they shouldn't have been with me in the first place. They don't have nice things to say about me. I would presume if anyone was listening, which they're not.

[Jamie Laing]

They're not listening. What do you like most about yourself?

[Katherine Ryan]

I like my hyper independence. Even though it causes problems and is officially a toxic trait. You're meant to be able to ask for help. But I really like it. But I look at myself, I go, good for you. Like, anyone can do whatever they want and you've got it. I love that.

[Jamie Laing]

Come on. I love that too. Last one. Favorite swear word.

[Katherine Ryan]

Oh, I. Oh, Jamie, get in there. I went to a meeting.

[Jamie Laing]

Okay.

[Katherine Ryan]

In Soho.

[Jamie Laing]

Oh, yeah.

[Katherine Ryan]

I am a white woman over 40 with this accent. So this receptionist who was in a place of work took a huge risk. She looked at me and she said, I love your bobs. My haircut. She goes, I love your bob. It's giving cunt. And I went, thank you. Like, she knew that I was in the queer enough sphere to understand that that was a compliment. And I said, young lady, you just took a risk today and I want you to know that it is paid off.

[Jamie Laing]

You're the best. I want everyone to go and listen to write me, daddy. You're amazing on it. You're the best thing in the world. We love you. You're the greatest. You're the greatest.

[Katherine Ryan]

You're the greatest.

[Jemima Kirke]

Oh, that was just solidly good. Normally when I listen, I'm like, oh, like, that's a really. That's a really good moment. I'm gonna start with that, like, really tough because it's just like a foghorn of like everything was really foghorn.

[Jamie Laing]

It's not a negative, a foghorn. Foghorn is a positive.

[Jemima Kirke]

I, I mean it in a positive. I don't know whether popcorn's positive.

[Jamie Laing]

I think.

[Jemima Kirke]

Yeah, but you know, if you imagine like waveforms where it goes quiet and then big and like that, like, like a journey, it's just constantly, like every part of it was just strong.

[Jamie Laing]

Well, if you enjoyed that episode, remember we have a catalog of other episodes which you can go back to and listen to and be entertaining your own right wardrobeful. And we hope you like them and we hope you enjoyed it so much that you'll come back next week as well. Because we love it when you come back. If you haven't subscribed to the show already, please do click that subscribe button. Also write me dirty. The show that Katherine Ryan is hosting is out. It's live. It's hilarious. It's wonderful.

[Jemima Kirke]

Very, very, very funny.

[Jamie Laing]

We're going to leave a link in the show description which you can click on and go to that. Remember, get in touch via Instagram at Great Company podcast or send us an email great [e-mail] and we'll see you next week for another episode of Great Company.

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[Katherine Ryan]

When life brings the blah, add more Yabba dabba doo with some tasty fruity Pebbles. Early morning meeting blah. Someone brought the Pebbles. Yabba dabba doo. Run errands blah. Head to the store for Pebbles. Yabba dabba doo. Fruity Pebbles Less blah, more Yabba dabba doo. Pick up Pebbles cereal today. Yabba dabba doo in the Flintstones and all related characters and elements Copyright and trademark Hanna Barbera.

[Upwork Advertiser]

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[Jamie Laing]

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