Grits and Eggs Podcast – Episode 100: "GRITS & GRANNY"

Date: November 11, 2025
Host: Deante’ Kyle
Guest: Dr. Cynthia Toles (Granny, educator, community leader)
Theme: A multigenerational conversation on Black Southern history, education, community, and the power of resilience, featuring “Granny” – Dr. Cynthia Toles – whose life and wisdom helped shape not only Deante’s path, but also those of countless others in Gadsden, Alabama and beyond.

Episode Overview

For its landmark 100th episode, host Deante’ Kyle slows things down and centers the conversation around gratitude, legacy, and giving due honor to the inspiration for the entire show: his grandmother, Dr. Cynthia Toles. Instead of festivities and fanfare, this deeply personal episode turns into a masterclass on Black Southern life—past, present, and future—through Dr. Toles’ eyes. They discuss her educational journey, the challenges and triumphs of being a Black educator and administrator, the shifting dynamics of community, the importance of skilled trades, local politics, family, and how relationships and resilience create lasting change.

Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Unfiltered Gratitude & Setting the Stage

• Deante’ immediately sets a grateful tone, joking about having the first “cuss-free” episode for Granny’s benefit.
• He credits Dr. Toles as “the reason there would be no Grits & Eggs Podcast,” making this her episode.
  • “[01:01] ...there would be no Grissy next podcast. So introduce yourself, Dr. Cynthia Toles, the Diva Delta.”

2. Dr. Cynthia Toles: Southern Roots, Relentless Learner

• Born and raised in Gadsden, Alabama, with schooling in Michigan and Alabama.
• An extensive educational resume:
  • Associate’s in History (Gadsden State), BS in History/Sociology (A&M), Certification in Elementary Ed (JSU), Master’s & EdS in Elementary Ed, Doctorate in Educational Leadership (UAB), Certificate in Paralegal Studies (2024), Degree in Christian Ed.
• Early ambition: to be a history professor or lawyer; reality was determined by the times and the job market.
  • “I have always been fascinated…never wanted to be a politician, but I was always fascinated with the political, the government.” [04:06]
  • Advised: paralegal experience is a strong foundation for aspiring lawyers. [05:41]

3. Segregation, Integration, and Neighborhood Life

• In the segregated South, Black neighborhoods were self-sufficient “communities,” providing everything from schools and stores to doctors and theaters.
  • “A neighborhood is where you can do everything in that neighborhood...Integration changed all of that.” [07:35]
• Participated in civil rights marches, but family kept her out of more volatile protests:
  • “I said, if they spit on me, I’ll tell you what I’m going to do. So she told me I couldn’t participate…” [09:41]
• School integration meant few Black teachers and students in predominantly white spaces, leading to “nice-nasty” (passive-aggressive) racism and strategic isolation.
  • “They know how to be nice to you and still be indifferent.” [11:49]
  • The experience of being “the only one” shaped her as an overachiever and advocate.

4. The Lonely Only: Navigating Racism in Education

• Faced active exclusion (e.g., not included in teacher gift traditions) but asserted herself.
  • “I came here to teach children, not color...eventually, it sort of relaxed the atmosphere. At least it did for me.” [13:13]
• On perseverance:
  • “I said, God, why do you always put me in these situations where I gotta fight?” [14:40]
• Even applied to be an FBI agent: passed the gun test, not the cognitive (and never held a gun before!). [16:00]

5. Mental Health, Family Support & Resilience

• Mentions the lack of open discussion about mental health in the Black community—underlines the importance of family support and focus on achievement.
  • “They taught us that once you got knowledge, they can't take that away from you.” [18:38]

6. Black Joy, Invention, and Resistance

• Discussion of Black excellence, invention, and America’s reliance on Black achievement—despite enduring obstacles.
  • “We have a good time with each other…as much as you throwing at us, we still overcoming. We so resilient.” [19:54]

7. The Power of Trades & Upward Mobility

• Dr. Toles advocates for skilled trades as paths to stability and independence.
  • “Get something that’s sustainable.” [24:24]
  • “Wherever you go, they need CDL drivers all over this country…when you get something sustainable, no matter where you go.” [24:36-24:46]
• Deante’ credits Granny’s guidance for his own success, which inspired others.
  • “Now that we've been talking about trades...I've gotten so many testimonials of young men and women that have gone on to go get trades.” [21:43]

8. Community Uplift & Quiet Giants

• Celebration of Dr. Toles’ impact as “the first Black woman to do a lot of things in that county.”
• Emphasis: you don’t have to be a public figure to create generational change.

9. Leadership Philosophy: Open Doors, Relatability, and High Expectations

• As principal, emphasized an open-door policy, active listening, and high achievement for both students and staff.
  • “If you don't care about the children, you don't get to stay there very long...I treat them like human beings, but I also had a great expectation out of them.” [37:42]
  • Detailing her experience as an administrator in Nigeria—culture shock, lack of amenities, “zero discipline problems,” and how “all Americans are spoiled.” [41:13, 47:14]

10. Global Perspective: Principal-ing in Nigeria

• Lived and worked as a principal in Lagos, sharing stories of both adversity (safety risks, power outages, poverty) and respect/kindness.
• “We don’t know how blessed we are…God bless America, too.” [41:13]
• “I didn't realize how much danger I was in until I came back to the States.” [42:39]
  • Shared stories of police extortion, restricted movement, and cultural nuances.
• The experience affirmed how environments shape expectations and drive (“they hated to see me go...[but] there was a negative atmosphere with the administration and how they talked to the teachers. And I changed that atmosphere.” [47:14])

11. Giving Back: Politics & Local Impact

• Transitioned from education to city council for two terms, drawing on community support from her lifetime of service.
  • “I had a friend...she said, you’re running for city council. I said, I didn’t know that...your name is already out there.” [50:09]
• Became council president, almost ran for mayor, learned the importance of local government:
  • “Local is your foundation…for people to say, I’m not going to vote in the local election, they don’t know how that’s not effective.” [57:11]

12. Voting, Political Identity & Black Men

• Heavy focus on the importance of voting, esp. local.
• Discusses how Black men are targeted by new conservative movements, emphasizing continuous engagement.
  • “If the Republican party can get 25% of the black men to vote Republican, they can rule for the next hundred years.” [58:47]
• Examines the online “red pill” phenomenon and how black men sometimes get pulled in through appeals to self-help, then nudged toward conservative politics. [61:00+]
  • “When it came time for politics...you already immersed in this community, right?...we all voting for Trump, nigga. Like, yeah, all right...”

13. Healing the Community: The Power of Inclusion, Relationships, and Accountability

• On men holding men accountable and the importance of positive masculine role models and consistent presence. [65:27]
  • “One of the biggest sentiments...is that, yeah, we might not have had a whole bunch of money, but like, it was consistent...my daddy was there.” [65:27]
• How Black community must balance critique with actionable solutions, or “breaking down and leaving the pieces.” [67:00+]
• The importance of building in-person, local connections—not just online.

14. Relationships, Family, and Communication

• "Everything starts at home." [54:37, 72:05]
• Communication, affection, and strong family bonds discussed at length, including the transformative power of love and touch across generations. [72:05, 76:28]
  • “I try to...be humble. I don't forget where I came from...we played together as a neighborhood.” [79:31]
• Dr. Toles and Deante’ reflect on changing family dynamics, encouraging more affection and fewer walls in contemporary families.

15. The War on Drugs: Pre & Post-Crack Eras

• Dr. Toles observes the impact was “somewhat hidden” early on, but more open after crack.
  • "In a small city where I am...she said, you're in the minority. It was more people on drugs than not." [83:22]
• Stronger impact of alcohol and bootlegging in her youth than drugs—a point of contrast.

16. Legacy of Influence

• Dr. Toles is most proud of her positive influence on generations of young people, seeing former students succeed in fields from HVAC to education.
  • “My greatest achievement is seeing children achieve.” [86:49]
• Final words: “Keep achieving, keep striving, enjoy life...I learned that people’s perception is not my reality.” [88:10, 88:32]

Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• On adversity & advocacy:
  • Dr. Toles [11:49]: “They know how to be nice to you and still be indifferent.”
  • Dr. Toles [13:13]: “I came here to teach children, not color. I don’t want to move in your neighborhood...I came here to do a job.”
• On resilience:
  • Deante’ [19:54]: “We so resilient, and we're improving the lives of this nation that's around us constantly, right?”
• On trades:
  • Dr. Toles [24:24]: “Get something that’s sustainable.”
  • Deante’ [24:48]: “Once you're proficient enough, you can open up your own business...lend those skills to your neighborhood.”
• On youth & change:
  • Dr. Toles [27:06]: “...the other thing that you complimented me on was the fact that basically I was open minded. I'm not one track mind to put, you know, all young people down because I made a statement to myself in my younger days that I wanted to remember that I was young one time.”

Timestamps for Key Segments

• [01:36] – Dr. Cynthia Toles introduces herself and shares her educational journey
• [07:35] – Reflection on life in segregated Gadsden, integration, and neighborhood life
• [13:13] – Dr. Toles describes teacher exclusion and asserting herself
• [18:38] – Importance of education and generational advice
• [21:43] – How encouraging trades changed Deante’s life and others’
• [37:37] – Transition from teacher to principal, educational philosophy
• [41:13] – Life as a principal in Nigeria; contrast to US education/environments
• [47:14] – Impact in Nigeria and on returning to Alabama
• [50:09, 51:15] – From retirement to city council, local politics’ importance
• [53:40] – Differences in how southern cities handle local politics
• [58:47] – Republican strategy targeting Black men, reflections on political engagement
• [65:27] – Men holding each other accountable, importance of positive masculinity
• [72:05] – Centrality of relationships and communication in thriving communities
• [76:28] – Interpersonal family affections and legacy of love
• [83:22] – Pre- and post-crack Black communities, alcohol vs drugs
• [86:49] – Dr. Toles on her proudest achievement: influencing young people

Conclusion

This episode is rich, intimate, and intergenerational—a journey from the Jim Crow South to the global stage and back to small-town Alabama. As Deante’ says, “This is my grandma”—and by the end, listeners will feel she’s their grandma, too. Dr. Toles’ blend of candor, humility, and hard-won wisdom echoes long after, reminding listeners that “people’s perception is not my reality” and that change, resilience, and love start at home, but ripple across generations.

"Keep achieving, keep striving, enjoy life...People’s perception is not my reality.” — Dr. Cynthia Toles [88:32]

Deante’ Kyle ends with:
“You are like, one of my biggest examples of, like, what I want to be in this life…on a local level, I would want that same thing for myself, and I want that for my children when they come up.” [78:49]

For Listeners

• Skip ads and intros; jump straight to the content at [00:43].
• The episode transcends local history—it's for anyone interested in Black resilience, the value of education (both academic and vocational), and the importance of knowing and loving your roots.

Delta Sigma Theta shoutout and final words at [88:56].
Bonus: Closing family rap at [89:21].