Handsome Podcast — "Pretty Little Episode #59"

Hosts: Tig Notaro, Fortune Feimster
Date: October 3, 2025

Overview

This episode of "Handsome" brings the signature warmth and banter between Tig Notaro and Fortune Feimster (with Mae Martin largely absent from the conversation), as they dig into listener questions about jealousy and favorite life ages. The hosts regale listeners with playful stories, their signature tongue-in-cheek humor, and surprisingly practical life insights—showcasing the blend of honesty and ridiculousness that makes this podcast so charming.

Key Discussion Points & Insights

Catching Up & Country Music Banter

• Fortune's Big News: Fortune shares she's leaving her "imaginary grandma's bedroom" and heading back to Los Angeles to film a new TV show, expressing excitement at the rare chance to work in LA after years filming elsewhere.
  • [01:26–01:37] Fortune: “It's going to be filming in Los Angeles, which is rare.”
• Music Chat & Playful Singing: Tig and Fortune bond over a love of 90s country music, briefly singing “This Girl Is On Fire” and other country hits. The conversation turns whimsically detailed, discussing specific likes and the quirks of country artists.
  • [02:09] Fortune: “This girl is on fire.”
  • [03:01] Tig: “Well, I know music. Music is my sweet spot. … Pop to country. Old country, new country, heavy metal.”
• Problematic Faves and Honesty: Tig admits enjoying music by Jason Aldean, even as she notes the challenge as a queer person liking an artist with different values. It sparks thoughtful, funny self-reflection.
  • [04:33] Tig: “I do like this one guy so much, but he is so far off from my beliefs...I don’t think he’s a fan of my existence.”
  • [04:47] Tig: “Jason Aldean.”
  • [05:00] Fortune: “Yeah. Conservative side.”

Handsome Country Band (and Titular Banter)

• Recurring Joke: Tig proposes starting a “Handsome” country band, pondering what Mae would do, and Fortune provides signature zany humor about roles (“twist my titty” makes several appearances as both a catchphrase and visual joke).
  • [06:13] Fortune: “I don’t think May probably knows a single country song.”
  • [06:26] Fortune: “Twist my titty. Is that the saying?”
  • [07:34] Tig: “No, no, I was picturing grabbing a hold of one and just twisting the whole thing.”

Listener Question 1: Dealing With Jealousy (Mackenzie from Sherbrooke, Quebec)

Timestamp: [08:34–13:06]

Approaches to Jealousy

• Tig’s Take:
  • Openly reflects on her own past relationship jealousy—rooted in insecurity and immaturity—and the ways relationships sometimes involve mutual “testing” to provoke jealousy.
  • When it comes to social media jealousy, Tig admits she’s more curious about people who overshare intense happiness than she is personally jealous; she feels content in her own life and has grown out of professional jealousy as she clarified her own path and dreams.
  • [09:27] Tig: “I’ve certainly had...relationships...when I was so much younger, obviously insecure…”
  • [10:53] Tig: “You know, I think...when it becomes a lot, I start to wonder, like, why does somebody need to show constant joy?”
• Fortune’s Perspective:
  • Says she doesn’t get jealous often anymore, but is quick to note everyone experiences jealousy at some point.
  • Self-esteem and secure partnerships are crucial – a healthy partner won’t play games to provoke jealousy.
  • Shares that refusing to “take the bait” when someone tries to make you jealous results in better outcomes.
  • Ultimately, Fortune values her peace and chooses not to remain in situations that chip away at it.
  • [14:47] Fortune: “I value my peace so much that if I was in a situation...where the person I was with was kind of trying to make me jealous...I didn’t want to be in that situation anymore.”

Memorable Quotes

• [15:16] Tig: “You have to really organize in your head what you really want for your life and to not confuse somebody else’s dream with your dream.”
• [17:13] Tig: “It’s all perspective…but it’s good to not confuse your dream with somebody else’s.”
• [17:38] Fortune: “Hopefully that helps...and the better we feel about ourselves, the better...relationships will be and benefit from that.”

Takeaways

• Work on self-esteem and clarify what YOU want.
• Avoid relationships where jealousy is a tactic.
• Celebrate others’ successes and acknowledge your feelings honestly.
• Don’t confuse your own aspirations with someone else’s.

Listener Question 2: What’s Your Favorite Age? (Heather from St. Louis)

Timestamp: [18:13–25:28]

Reflections on “Best Ages”

• Fortune’s Reflection:
  • Enjoyed each stage of life for different reasons—college for the fun, 20s for creativity and friendship, 30s for breaking into her professional field, marriage for unique experiences, and current age as a period of newfound happiness and optimism.
  • [18:45] Fortune: “I've enjoyed different eras of my life for different reasons.”
  • [19:30] Fortune: “Maybe the best is yet to come.”
• Tig’s Response:
  • Relates the question to a recent conversation with her family and reflects that right now is her favorite time—having found love, family, career fulfillment, and most of all, health after struggles.
  • Expresses hopefulness for the future, especially to witness her children’s lives unfold.
  • [21:32] Tig: “What has unfolded in my life as far as finding Stephanie, having Max and Finn, and seeing my comedy career come true...there’s truly nothing more than maintaining what I have.”
  • [22:17] Tig: “My North Star is I want to take care of myself, and I want to see their lives.”
• Philosophy on Age and Healing:
  • Experience brings resilience; they both advise to “lick your wounds” (deal with hard times), but not dwell too long—life has too much good to offer moving forward.
  • [23:10] Tig: “You're gonna get over it one day, so might as well do it now, you know?”

Heather’s Own Answer

• Prefers 30s and 40s for the confidence and self-acceptance, even as she dislikes aging’s “aches and pains.”
• Wisdom and prioritizing health gain more importance with age.
  • [23:29] Heather: “I love being more sure of myself and loving that I don’t give a shit as much about what other people think...I wish I wasn’t so achy and painy.”

Health Talk

• Tig underscores: The ages 35–45 are an opportune window to reclaim or improve health, and reflects on her own youthful sense of invincibility—lost only after health crises.
  • [24:46] Tig: “My understanding is 35 to 45, that’s the prime time to try and turn that ship around...not that you can’t at 70, but...that’s when you really have such a massive opportunity.”

Notable Quotes & Moments

• [04:33] Tig: “I do like this one guy so much, but he is so far off from my beliefs...but I enjoy his music, and I struggle.”
• [14:47] Fortune: “I value my peace so much that...eventually that got old to me and I didn’t want to be in that situation anymore.”
• [15:16] Tig: “You have to really organize in your head what you really want for your life and to not confuse somebody else’s dream with your dream...”
• [19:30] Fortune: “Maybe the best is yet to come.”
• [21:32] Tig: “What has unfolded in my life as far as finding Stephanie, having Max and Finn, and seeing my comedy career come true...there’s truly nothing more than maintaining what I have.”
• [23:10] Tig: “You're gonna get over it one day, so might as well do it now.”
• [23:29] Heather (listener): “I love being more sure of myself and loving that I don’t give a shit as much about what other people think...I wish I wasn’t so achy and painy.”

Timestamps for Important Segments

• [01:01] — Fortune and Tig catch up on Fortune’s move and upcoming TV filming
• [02:09] — Country music banter and playful singing
• [04:33] — Honest discussion about liking problematic artists
• [06:13] — Joking about forming a “Handsome” country band
• [08:34] — Listener question: How to handle jealousy
• [13:06] — Practical insights about self-esteem, peace, and healthy relationships
• [18:13] — Listener question: Favorite age decade
• [21:32] — Tig on family and cherishing the present
• [24:46] — Discussion on the importance of health at midlife

Tone, Style, and Final Thoughts

The episode balances humorous asides and musical interludes with genuine, vulnerable answers to listeners’ life dilemmas. The hosts freely admit their own past struggles with jealousy and self-doubt, using both wit and honesty to offer empathetic, practical advice. Listeners get both the laughs and the wisdom that make "Handsome" uniquely charming.

Closing Notes:
If any listeners want to ask questions or share stories, visit speakpipe.com/HandsomePod.

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