Pretty Little Episode #59

Summary

Handsome Podcast — "Pretty Little Episode #59"

Hosts: Tig Notaro, Fortune Feimster
Date: October 3, 2025

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Overview

This episode of "Handsome" brings the signature warmth and banter between Tig Notaro and Fortune Feimster (with Mae Martin largely absent from the conversation), as they dig into listener questions about jealousy and favorite life ages. The hosts regale listeners with playful stories, their signature tongue-in-cheek humor, and surprisingly practical life insights—showcasing the blend of honesty and ridiculousness that makes this podcast so charming.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

Catching Up & Country Music Banter

• Fortune's Big News: Fortune shares she's leaving her "imaginary grandma's bedroom" and heading back to Los Angeles to film a new TV show, expressing excitement at the rare chance to work in LA after years filming elsewhere.
  • [01:26–01:37] Fortune: “It's going to be filming in Los Angeles, which is rare.”
• Music Chat & Playful Singing: Tig and Fortune bond over a love of 90s country music, briefly singing “This Girl Is On Fire” and other country hits. The conversation turns whimsically detailed, discussing specific likes and the quirks of country artists.
  • [02:09] Fortune: “This girl is on fire.”
  • [03:01] Tig: “Well, I know music. Music is my sweet spot. … Pop to country. Old country, new country, heavy metal.”
• Problematic Faves and Honesty: Tig admits enjoying music by Jason Aldean, even as she notes the challenge as a queer person liking an artist with different values. It sparks thoughtful, funny self-reflection.
  • [04:33] Tig: “I do like this one guy so much, but he is so far off from my beliefs...I don’t think he’s a fan of my existence.”
  • [04:47] Tig: “Jason Aldean.”
  • [05:00] Fortune: “Yeah. Conservative side.”

Handsome Country Band (and Titular Banter)

• Recurring Joke: Tig proposes starting a “Handsome” country band, pondering what Mae would do, and Fortune provides signature zany humor about roles (“twist my titty” makes several appearances as both a catchphrase and visual joke).
  • [06:13] Fortune: “I don’t think May probably knows a single country song.”
  • [06:26] Fortune: “Twist my titty. Is that the saying?”
  • [07:34] Tig: “No, no, I was picturing grabbing a hold of one and just twisting the whole thing.”

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Listener Question 1: Dealing With Jealousy (Mackenzie from Sherbrooke, Quebec)

Timestamp: [08:34–13:06]

Approaches to Jealousy

• Tig’s Take:
  • Openly reflects on her own past relationship jealousy—rooted in insecurity and immaturity—and the ways relationships sometimes involve mutual “testing” to provoke jealousy.
  • When it comes to social media jealousy, Tig admits she’s more curious about people who overshare intense happiness than she is personally jealous; she feels content in her own life and has grown out of professional jealousy as she clarified her own path and dreams.
  • [09:27] Tig: “I’ve certainly had...relationships...when I was so much younger, obviously insecure…”
  • [10:53] Tig: “You know, I think...when it becomes a lot, I start to wonder, like, why does somebody need to show constant joy?”
• Fortune’s Perspective:
  • Says she doesn’t get jealous often anymore, but is quick to note everyone experiences jealousy at some point.
  • Self-esteem and secure partnerships are crucial – a healthy partner won’t play games to provoke jealousy.
  • Shares that refusing to “take the bait” when someone tries to make you jealous results in better outcomes.
  • Ultimately, Fortune values her peace and chooses not to remain in situations that chip away at it.
  • [14:47] Fortune: “I value my peace so much that if I was in a situation...where the person I was with was kind of trying to make me jealous...I didn’t want to be in that situation anymore.”

Memorable Quotes

• [15:16] Tig: “You have to really organize in your head what you really want for your life and to not confuse somebody else’s dream with your dream.”
• [17:13] Tig: “It’s all perspective…but it’s good to not confuse your dream with somebody else’s.”
• [17:38] Fortune: “Hopefully that helps...and the better we feel about ourselves, the better...relationships will be and benefit from that.”

Takeaways

• Work on self-esteem and clarify what YOU want.
• Avoid relationships where jealousy is a tactic.
• Celebrate others’ successes and acknowledge your feelings honestly.
• Don’t confuse your own aspirations with someone else’s.

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Listener Question 2: What’s Your Favorite Age? (Heather from St. Louis)

Timestamp: [18:13–25:28]

Reflections on “Best Ages”

• Fortune’s Reflection:
  • Enjoyed each stage of life for different reasons—college for the fun, 20s for creativity and friendship, 30s for breaking into her professional field, marriage for unique experiences, and current age as a period of newfound happiness and optimism.
  • [18:45] Fortune: “I've enjoyed different eras of my life for different reasons.”
  • [19:30] Fortune: “Maybe the best is yet to come.”
• Tig’s Response:
  • Relates the question to a recent conversation with her family and reflects that right now is her favorite time—having found love, family, career fulfillment, and most of all, health after struggles.
  • Expresses hopefulness for the future, especially to witness her children’s lives unfold.
  • [21:32] Tig: “What has unfolded in my life as far as finding Stephanie, having Max and Finn, and seeing my comedy career come true...there’s truly nothing more than maintaining what I have.”
  • [22:17] Tig: “My North Star is I want to take care of myself, and I want to see their lives.”
• Philosophy on Age and Healing:
  • Experience brings resilience; they both advise to “lick your wounds” (deal with hard times), but not dwell too long—life has too much good to offer moving forward.
  • [23:10] Tig: “You're gonna get over it one day, so might as well do it now, you know?”

Heather’s Own Answer

• Prefers 30s and 40s for the confidence and self-acceptance, even as she dislikes aging’s “aches and pains.”
• Wisdom and prioritizing health gain more importance with age.
  • [23:29] Heather: “I love being more sure of myself and loving that I don’t give a shit as much about what other people think...I wish I wasn’t so achy and painy.”

Health Talk

• Tig underscores: The ages 35–45 are an opportune window to reclaim or improve health, and reflects on her own youthful sense of invincibility—lost only after health crises.
  • [24:46] Tig: “My understanding is 35 to 45, that’s the prime time to try and turn that ship around...not that you can’t at 70, but...that’s when you really have such a massive opportunity.”

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Notable Quotes & Moments

• [04:33] Tig: “I do like this one guy so much, but he is so far off from my beliefs...but I enjoy his music, and I struggle.”
• [14:47] Fortune: “I value my peace so much that...eventually that got old to me and I didn’t want to be in that situation anymore.”
• [15:16] Tig: “You have to really organize in your head what you really want for your life and to not confuse somebody else’s dream with your dream...”
• [19:30] Fortune: “Maybe the best is yet to come.”
• [21:32] Tig: “What has unfolded in my life as far as finding Stephanie, having Max and Finn, and seeing my comedy career come true...there’s truly nothing more than maintaining what I have.”
• [23:10] Tig: “You're gonna get over it one day, so might as well do it now.”
• [23:29] Heather (listener): “I love being more sure of myself and loving that I don’t give a shit as much about what other people think...I wish I wasn’t so achy and painy.”

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Timestamps for Important Segments

• [01:01] — Fortune and Tig catch up on Fortune’s move and upcoming TV filming
• [02:09] — Country music banter and playful singing
• [04:33] — Honest discussion about liking problematic artists
• [06:13] — Joking about forming a “Handsome” country band
• [08:34] — Listener question: How to handle jealousy
• [13:06] — Practical insights about self-esteem, peace, and healthy relationships
• [18:13] — Listener question: Favorite age decade
• [21:32] — Tig on family and cherishing the present
• [24:46] — Discussion on the importance of health at midlife

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Tone, Style, and Final Thoughts

The episode balances humorous asides and musical interludes with genuine, vulnerable answers to listeners’ life dilemmas. The hosts freely admit their own past struggles with jealousy and self-doubt, using both wit and honesty to offer empathetic, practical advice. Listeners get both the laughs and the wisdom that make "Handsome" uniquely charming.

Closing Notes:
If any listeners want to ask questions or share stories, visit speakpipe.com/HandsomePod.

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Summary by [your name or attribution].

Transcript

[May Martin]

This is a Headgun podcast. Checking Allstate first for a quote that could save you hundreds on car insurance is smart. Unfortunately not. Checking that you're in the correct movie theater is not smart. You don't want to settle in to watch the latest rom com, only for it to turn out to be the scariest horror movie you've ever laid your eyeballs on.

[Tig Notaro]

Yeah, checking first is smart. So check Allstate first for a quote that could save you hundreds. You're in good hands with Allstate. Potential savings vary subject to terms, conditions and availability. Allstate North American Insurance Company and affiliates, Northbrook, Illinois.

[Fortune Feimster]

Handsome. Chat with friends on the Handsome Pod Chatting with friends on the Handsome Pod Pretty little episode. Welcome to the Handsome Pods preload episode. I'm Fortune Feemster.

[Tig Notaro]

And I am your dear, dear friend, Tig Notaro.

[Fortune Feimster]

And we're together.

[Tig Notaro]

We are together. Just. Deeply in love.

[Fortune Feimster]

Yes. Kisses.

[Tig Notaro]

I see you're still in Grandma's imaginary grandma's bedroom.

[Fortune Feimster]

Yep. Just. This is my last day in this here grandma bedroom.

[Tig Notaro]

Okay. All right. And what else, Fortune? Where are you off to after you leave Grandma's bedroom?

[Fortune Feimster]

I have to go back to Los Angeles because I start this new television show.

[Tig Notaro]

Nice.

[Fortune Feimster]

It's going to be filming in Los Angeles, which is rare.

[Tig Notaro]

That's a luxury.

[Fortune Feimster]

Yeah.

[Tig Notaro]

You must be thrilled.

[Fortune Feimster]

Yeah. I can't believe it. I have not. I. For a good 10 years, I shot in LA every year. And then in the last four years, I have not filmed in L. A once. Wow. I mean, aside from, like, one off things like.

[Tig Notaro]

Oh, okay.

[Fortune Feimster]

I'm just talking about, like, series and stuff.

[Tig Notaro]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Fortune Feimster]

But, yeah, so this is a treat.

[Tig Notaro]

That's amazing. That's really great. Well, you're on fire, kitten.

[Fortune Feimster]

This girl is on fire.

[Tig Notaro]

Now, do you mind complaints when I chime in with the singing?

[Fortune Feimster]

Oh, I love it.

[Tig Notaro]

Okay, so let's take it again. Two, three and.

[Fortune Feimster]

Wow. You wrote some vibrato, as they say.

[Tig Notaro]

Yes, yes, I did.

[Fortune Feimster]

Where did you learn that?

[Tig Notaro]

I just. I just went rogue and it came out. And that's Alicia Keys.

[Fortune Feimster]

Sure is.

[Tig Notaro]

Yes, yes, yes. Boy, is she phenomenal.

[Fortune Feimster]

Look at you, pop culture queen.

[Tig Notaro]

Well, I know music.

[Fortune Feimster]

That's true.

[Tig Notaro]

Yeah. Music is my sweet spot.

[Fortune Feimster]

That's right. That's right.

[Tig Notaro]

Yeah. And that goes from pop to country. Old country, new country, heavy metal.

[Fortune Feimster]

I love me some 90s ladies. Country Cena. Sure, sure.

[Tig Notaro]

Well, I mean, the chicks.

[Fortune Feimster]

Tails.

[Tig Notaro]

California.

[Fortune Feimster]

Up at the mountain down by the ocean where it don't matter Long as we Go somewhere. I got a quarter head.

[Tig Notaro]

Carolina.

[Fortune Feimster]

California.

[Tig Notaro]

Okay.

[Fortune Feimster]

That's right. And then. Yeah. The chicks. AI.

[Tig Notaro]

Yeah. Now, I do enjoy a female country singer, but I feel like the majority. I like male country singers.

[Fortune Feimster]

Oh. Like, give me example.

[Tig Notaro]

Keith Whitley.

[Fortune Feimster]

Okay.

[Tig Notaro]

Okay.

[Fortune Feimster]

Anybody else? I love anybody that wears straight jeans.

[Tig Notaro]

I love Willie.

[Fortune Feimster]

Willie.

[Tig Notaro]

Yeah. Yeah. I like Dirk Spentley.

[Fortune Feimster]

Oh, okay.

[Tig Notaro]

I like Tim McGraw. I like George Strait.

[Fortune Feimster]

Yeah. Yeah, yeah.

[Tig Notaro]

I do like this one guy so much, but he is so far off from my.

[Fortune Feimster]

Oh.

[Tig Notaro]

Beliefs.

[Fortune Feimster]

Is he problematic?

[Tig Notaro]

Well, he just, I don't think, is a fan of my existence. Hilarious. But I enjoy his music, and it. I struggle.

[Fortune Feimster]

You want to say who it is or no?

[Tig Notaro]

Jason Aldean.

[Fortune Feimster]

Oh, wow. Did not expect that.

[Tig Notaro]

Wait, why? Because you don't like Jason Aldean.

[Fortune Feimster]

I mean, he just is, like, more on the.

[Tig Notaro]

Yeah.

[Fortune Feimster]

You know.

[Tig Notaro]

Yes, he is. Yeah.

[Fortune Feimster]

Conservative side.

[Tig Notaro]

Oh, yes, he is. Yeah. And it also goes without saying that I do love me some Brad Paisley.

[Fortune Feimster]

That's right. We like Brad. You like that song? I don't know. Who's singing? Josh Turner. Baby Turn. Maybe lock the door and turn the light.

[Tig Notaro]

Yes.

[Fortune Feimster]

Something, something baby Soft and slow we ain't got no other place to go and then I forgot the rest.

[Tig Notaro]

What would we. You also didn't know most of that.

[Fortune Feimster]

I started off not knowing most of.

[Tig Notaro]

It and then really, really continued with that.

[Fortune Feimster]

I just like it when they go real low with their voice, just like you do in our handsome song.

[Tig Notaro]

Now, what do you say? I know we've talked about starting a handsome band, but what if we started a handsome country band? What would May do?

[Fortune Feimster]

May would have to play the guitar still.

[Tig Notaro]

I know, but May. I don't know that May enjoys country music.

[Fortune Feimster]

I don't think May probably knows a single country song. No, but we could be surprised. We'll have to ask May next time we're all together.

[Tig Notaro]

We could be surprised.

[Fortune Feimster]

I guess I'll have to be the lead singer. Vine.

[Tig Notaro]

Yes, you will.

[Fortune Feimster]

Twist my titty. Is that the saying?

[Tig Notaro]

Is that the saying?

[Fortune Feimster]

Yeah. Twist my titty. I'll do it.

[Tig Notaro]

I don't. I, I, I don't know, but I immediately pictured twisting your titty. And.

[Fortune Feimster]

And I said yes.

[Tig Notaro]

It's so visual.

[Fortune Feimster]

I know. That's why it works.

[Tig Notaro]

Yes. And it. And, and to twist a titty, it feels like it has to be substantial. And I know based on what you've told me, you don't have a substantial rack.

[Fortune Feimster]

They are there. They just point down.

[Tig Notaro]

I, I did not know that. I thought they were just. I thought they were just minor. They're just giving two thumbs down, two nips down.

[Fortune Feimster]

They're there.

[Tig Notaro]

Okay.

[Fortune Feimster]

So you have to just go from underneath.

[Tig Notaro]

Huh.

[Fortune Feimster]

Well.

[Tig Notaro]

But what are you doing with your fingers? I was picturing. Oh. I was picturing twisting the whole thing.

[Fortune Feimster]

Oh, you wanted to. Okay.

[Tig Notaro]

Like, that's what I'm saying.

[Fortune Feimster]

You wanted this. I guess I was just doing nips there.

[Tig Notaro]

No, no, I was picturing grabbing a hold of one and just twisting the whole thing.

[Fortune Feimster]

Yeah. Wow. Okay.

[Tig Notaro]

Yeah.

[Fortune Feimster]

Why not?

[Tig Notaro]

Yeah, why not? We're co hosts of a podcast. Might as well twist your titty.

[Fortune Feimster]

How do we get in the happy conversations we get into?

[Tig Notaro]

I don't know. But here we are.

[Fortune Feimster]

I blame. I blame myself.

[Tig Notaro]

I blame Jason Aldean. It's crazy that I like him.

[Heather]

Yes.

[Tig Notaro]

Wait, no. You just don't like his music, or you just don't like his political beliefs?

[Fortune Feimster]

I mean, I don't know what. I guess I don't know what his songs are.

[Tig Notaro]

Oh, okay.

[Fortune Feimster]

But anyway, I like Luke Bryan.

[Tig Notaro]

Oh, yeah.

[Fortune Feimster]

He's wears those tight jeans.

[Tig Notaro]

You like guys? You like anyone in a tight pair of jeans?

[Fortune Feimster]

Yeah, why not? Yeah, sure. Yeah. Yeah.

[Tig Notaro]

Come on now. Come on now.

[Fortune Feimster]

Well, should we get some questions here?

[Tig Notaro]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Fortune Feimster]

Okay.

[Mackenzie]

Hi, handsome, this is mackenzie. I'm calling in from Sherbrooke, Quebec. I'm hanging with my dog, Jude and my little cat, Shrimp, and we need some advice on handling jealousy. And I'm wondering if you guys have any productive ways that you can twist and turn jealousy into maybe becoming, like, a healthier version of yourselves or if there's any silly ways you recognize your own behaviors when you realize you get jealous and. Yeah, I just. I wanna. I wanna be better, you know? So let me know.

[Fortune Feimster]

We were just talking about twisting.

[Tig Notaro]

Funny, I know. Twisting the night away. Twisting. Twisting the titty away.

[Fortune Feimster]

You don't strike me as someone who gets J at all.

[Tig Notaro]

I mean, I've certainly had. I've been in relationships, you know, where I was so much more. I was so much younger, obviously insecure and. And probably, you know, aside from taking responsibility for myself, I feel like I also was at times with people where, you know, we were touring, toying with each other.

[Fortune Feimster]

Right. Trying to incite jealousy, you mean?

[Tig Notaro]

Yeah. Or just you're. You're hoping to see if they like you enough.

[Fortune Feimster]

Right, Right.

[Tig Notaro]

You know, and I definitely have been guilty of doing that. And then, you know, I've had some jealous moments with Stephanie where I felt like. Like when we were first Getting together or, you know, conversations you can get into, exploring feelings and thoughts, and you're like, oh, hold on, wait one. But it's always ultimately just. I mean, obviously when you have a connection with somebody and you can actually get in there and get completely uncomfortable and rid yourself of that. Of, you know, and that's in a relationship. And I've heard of people getting jealous. I had this friend of mine where he was like, oh, my God, I had to get off social media. I'm so seething with jealousy. You know what I mean?

[Fortune Feimster]

Yeah. Of, like, other people doing well, that kind of thing.

[Tig Notaro]

Yeah. Or their lives, you know, because the go to is to show all the shining moments of life and. And I don't know, I think.

[Mackenzie]

For.

[Tig Notaro]

Me, I don't know. I don't know. I don't feel jealous looking at people experiencing joy or whatever. I think when it's over the top, my thoughts flip into, why are you trying?

[Fortune Feimster]

Like, why are you. What are you masking?

[Tig Notaro]

Yeah. Or why are you, like, if you're really happy and enjoying yourself, probably you're not gonna be thinking, I need to share every moment with the general public.

[Fortune Feimster]

Is my feeling out there enjoying it?

[Tig Notaro]

Yeah. It's like. But of course, there you sometimes are like, God, I have to show this thing. Or I. And I don't. I don't want to sound judgmental. That's just. My feeling is, like, when it becomes a lot, I start to wonder, like, why does somebody need to show constant joy?

[Fortune Feimster]

Right.

[Tig Notaro]

Not that I'm looking for them to show constant sadness, but I don't. I don't feel. I don't feel jealous of. Of that. And I think it's probably also because I feel. I feel pretty good about where I am. And I. I, like, I don't know. I just. I don't know of anybody. Where I go, God, I want their relationship or their career, or I feel. I just feel pretty good with things. And I always just kind of feel like I want to maintain this, but I can't claim that that was. I was certainly in the beginning of my career when people would, you know, get opportunities and shows or festivals or a TV appearance that I wasn't getting any traction, I would be like, what in the hell do I have to do? You know? And there are streaks of jealousy, but it's like, how long can you be jealous in a relationship or a career? You know what I mean?

[Fortune Feimster]

Yeah.

[Tig Notaro]

That's how I feel.

[Fortune Feimster]

Yeah. I mean, I don't really get jealous. Not to say I haven't gotten jealous. I think there's not a person on the planet.

[Tig Notaro]

Right.

[Fortune Feimster]

Who doesn't experience that at some point. I think ways to work on that are like, obviously your own self worth, feeling good about yourself and what you bring to the table helps. If you're in a relationship, your part, you know, part of that is your partner helping you feel secure. If. If you are in a situation where the person's not committing or flirty or, you know, that will definitely breed jealousy and insecurity. So it helps to have a person who is conscious of that. And, you know, I've in past things been tested before by whoever I was with. And there are times I took the bait and the times that I didn't take the bait, though, actually were always a more positive result. And it made the person not want to do it again because it didn't have a reaction. Like, they didn't get a reaction from it. So they were kind of like, oh, well, then that. Why am I doing that? And I just have. Fine. That I value my peace so much that if I was in a situation back, like back, back, back in the day where the person I was with was kind of trying to make me jealous, it would. I. And it, it would, it would chip away at my peace. And eventually that got old to me and I didn't want to be in that situation anymore.

[Tig Notaro]

Absolutely.

[Fortune Feimster]

So I would then, in my older age now, seek out people that don't have. Who aren't so insecure that they need that from you. That would be my suggestion would be, you know, finding people who don't. Who feel good about themselves, so they don't need to try to make you jealous in order to see if you like them. They'll just ask, hey, do you like me? Or they'll just, you know, like, yeah, yeah. I'm a fan of just being transparent.

[Tig Notaro]

Yeah. I think also I remember this is probably 25 years ago. I remember having this feeling come over me in my career when I was having waves of like, why, how come I can't get into this place? Or how come I can't get representation? Or. And then I had to kind of really organize in my head what I, Tig Notaro, really want for my life and to not confuse somebody else's dream with my dream or confuse my dream with somebody else's.

[Fortune Feimster]

Yeah.

[Tig Notaro]

Because that can send people so far down the wrong road that you end up taking on things where you're like, I didn't even want to do this. I don't just want Success and money and work. I want to do what makes me happy. And so I think you have to really get in touch with that. And I also think it's good to celebrate others that you really think are incredible, you know? Yeah, I, I just think being as authentic in that place of being like, man, that's a solid comedian, or like, they are the best working today, or that person annoys the hell out of me. But, God, have you seen them act? Yeah, like, I can. I can acknowledge they are an incredible actor, but they are annoying as hell. Checking Allstate first for a quote that could save you hundreds on car insurance is smart. Unfortunately, not checking that it's a school holiday is not smart. Showing up with your kids to school only to find out it fully closed means your whole day's schedule is going to have to be readjusted.

[May Martin]

Yeah, check in first is smart. So check Allstate first for a quote that could save you hundreds. You're in good hands with Allstate. Potential savings vary, subject to terms, conditions and availability. Allstate North American Insurance Company and affiliates, Northbrook, Illinois.

[Tig Notaro]

Anyway, but it's. It's all perspective. But I, I really think it's good to not confuse your dream with somebody else.

[Fortune Feimster]

Yeah, for sure.

[Tig Notaro]

Yeah. So.

[Fortune Feimster]

So hopefully, hopefully that that helps. And I would say all of us can work on our self esteem and the better we feel about ourselves, the better, you know, any of these friendships, work, relationships. Relationships will. Will be and benefit from that.

[Tig Notaro]

Yeah, for sure.

[Fortune Feimster]

Thank you, mackenzie, for that cool question.

[Tig Notaro]

Absolutely. And how embarrassing to be human, right? Yeah.

[Fortune Feimster]

I don't know a person on the planet who does not get jealous at some point. So just know that.

[Tig Notaro]

Oh, my God. Absolutely.

[Heather]

Hi, handsome. You are my favorite podcast ever. This is Heather from St. Louis. My question to you is, what is the favorite age you have lived or do you think you will live? If you haven't lived your favorite decade, what do you think will be your favorite decade?

[Fortune Feimster]

Interesting.

[Tig Notaro]

That is interesting. I love the questions we get.

[Fortune Feimster]

Yeah, well, I know because sometimes it's like these things you just have never thought of.

[Tig Notaro]

For sure.

[Fortune Feimster]

Gosh, I. I did. I've enjoyed different eras of my life for different reasons. Like, I loved college. I had such a blast in college. And I. I thought I could never top that. And I remember being sad to graduate thinking like, this is the best that it's gonna get. And then I had this like, period in my twenties that the groundlings being broke, but just like laughing all the time with my friends, creating.

[Tig Notaro]

Yeah.

[Fortune Feimster]

Things and then hitting my 30s and then get, you know, finally getting professional work and. And, like, getting to do what I love for a living. And then. And then I was married for a bit and, like, experience in that, and that was cool. And now I'm hitting an age where I think I'm pretty excited to see what's ahead. There was a period of time where I was like, oh, God, like, my life is falling apart. But this is the good. The good days are over. And then I've gotten out of that cloud and am experiencing some. Some very happy times and just excited for whatever this next phase is. So maybe the best is yet to come.

[Tig Notaro]

I bet you're right. It kind of reminds me of that episode where we were reflecting on the loss of Andrea Gibson, and I was saying that I really am all in for the surprises of life, you know, And I feel like that's really what you've come out of and are going into. And it's really, really fun to watch because it's, like, not in, like, a shallow way of, like, you know, when people put that meme or whatever of, like, somebody eating popcorn, watching.

[Fortune Feimster]

Right. But it's like that.

[Tig Notaro]

That's, like, what your past year has been of, like, oh, my gosh, where is this going? You know? And it. And it just continues to. You just continue to flourish. And it's exciting. And it's funny that this question came up, because last night, I can't remember if it was Max or Finn, but one of them asked something about. It was a very similar question to this. And. And I don't remember exactly what their question was, but my answer and Stephanie's was the same is that right now, this is my favorite time in life. And I've had, like, you going through all these different decades of your life. It's like, oh, my gosh, I had so many great, fun, exciting, crazy times.

[Fortune Feimster]

Yeah.

[Tig Notaro]

But what has unfolded in my life as far as finding Stephanie, having Max and Finn, and seeing my comedy career come true and that I'm healthy, I'm like, there's truly nothing more than maintaining what I have. What I'm most excited about is I want to maintain my health so I can see Max and Finn have their lives. Like, I really want to see where they go, what they do, if they have families and. Or if they don't, Whatever they have, I just. I want to see that. That's what I'm so excited about.

[Fortune Feimster]

Oh, I love that.

[Tig Notaro]

Yeah. If it's true, it's like, man, that's my North Star is I want to take care of myself, and I want to see. I want to see their lives.

[Fortune Feimster]

Yeah.

[Tig Notaro]

You know? Yeah. So I'd say yeah, right now. And me at 85, please.

[Fortune Feimster]

Yeah. The hope is that as you get older, there's just, like, new, cool things to look forward to and experience, and you're like, hopefully a more evolved version of yourself to rise to that occasion and appreciate the things that are good in your life. And you've had enough experiences with harder things that you've learned to get over those things quicker.

[Tig Notaro]

Yeah. I think we were saying it on. I think it was on this podcast or I said it somewhere else, but I just love that idea of, like, whatever it is, you're gonna get over it one day, so might as well do it now, you know?

[Fortune Feimster]

That's true.

[Tig Notaro]

And. And get on with the show.

[Fortune Feimster]

Yeah. No, no licking your wounds for too long. That's too much good stuff to experience out there.

[Tig Notaro]

Yes, indeed. But lick your wounds.

[Fortune Feimster]

Lick them for sure. Deal with them and lick them.

[Tig Notaro]

Hear Heather's answer so far.

[Heather]

I think I like my 30s and 40s best. I am right in between Fortune's age and Tig's age. Well, not right in between, but I'm 48, and I do appreciate being older for the wisdom, but I hate the age for the aches and pains. I love being more sure of myself and loving that I don't give a shit as much about what other people think. I just don't love the aches and pains. And I wish. I wish I wasn't so achy and painy. And so that's why I think we all start taking better care of ourselves in our older age, because you want to feel better. So eat healthy, exercise a bit, you know, et cetera. Make sure you go to those doctor appointments.

[Fortune Feimster]

Right. So, thanks.

[Heather]

Love you guys. Bye.

[Tig Notaro]

For sure.

[Fortune Feimster]

Yeah, I guess we. Yeah, you start prioritizing health. And for especially someone like you who's seen the. The debilitating nature of things, when you are feeling healthy, it. There's probably no better feeling.

[Tig Notaro]

Well, yeah. And like so many other people, it didn't really. My health didn't cross my mind until I lost it, you know, And I can't remember. She said she's 48.

[Fortune Feimster]

48. Yeah.

[Tig Notaro]

My understanding is 35 to 45. That's the prime time to try and turn that ship around. Like, you're still whatever shape you're in now. And not that you can't make a decision when you're 70 to turn the ship around because anytime works. But my understanding is between 35 and 45, you really still have such a massive opportunity to get your health in order. And that's something that I wish I, I wasn't so cocky about when I was younger that, like, I'm like, I'm fine. Nothing's gonna happen. And then once I lost it, I was like, oh, God, I'd do anything in the world. Please, please, please. You know?

[Fortune Feimster]

Right. Right.

[Tig Notaro]

So, yeah, I'm all for, for what Heather has to say. And I do, I, I can't express enough. I love, I get so excited to hear everyone's different questions and takes and, and that, that's real. So send it on in. Keep on sending it in.

[Fortune Feimster]

People could submit their questions or ask advice to any, any of [e-mail] HandsomePod.

[Tig Notaro]

That is where you send it. Oh, and very quickly, I will be in Salt Lake City on October 11th. Otherwise, go to tignotaro.com for all other show information. What about you, Fortune?

[Fortune Feimster]

I have some shows coming up in, like, Boston and Atlanta, Chicago and San Jose and Orlando and St. Petersburg. A bunch of stuff on my website.

[Tig Notaro]

Fortunepeemster.Com yeah, well, Fortune, love you dearly. Not queerly. I love you dearly too, pal. And until next time, what do you say?

[Fortune Feimster]

Keep it.

[Tig Notaro]

Keep it.

[Fortune Feimster]

Pretty Handsome.

[May Martin]

Pretty Handsome Handsome is hosted by me, May Martin, Tig Notaro and Fortune Feimster. The show is produced, recorded and edited by Thomas Willette. Email [e-mail] and please follow us on social media. Ansomepod.

[Fortune Feimster]

What a podcast. Podcast. What a podcast.

[Tig Notaro]

That was a headgum podcast.

[May Martin]

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[Tig Notaro]

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