Podcast Summary – Happier with Gretchen Rubin

Episode 573: Do You Avoid Failure & Rejection? Plus the Joy of a Same-Day Book
Date: February 11, 2026
Hosts: Gretchen Rubin & Elizabeth Craft

Main Theme

This episode explores the value of reframing failure and rejection as essential elements of personal growth and success, encapsulated in the idea of “Go for the No.” Additionally, Gretchen and Elizabeth dive into the sheer delight of “same-day books”—those reads you can start and finish in a single day—and share practical recommendations for anyone planning a reading retreat or looking for a satisfying bookish binge.

Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Community Updates & Listener Letters

• Stammtisch Tradition: A listener from Germany shares how regular, low-effort meetups with friends (Stammtisch) contribute to happiness and connectedness throughout life’s phases.
• Roast Chicken Substack: Listeners express excitement about Sarah’s upcoming “Chickening Out” Substack, with Gretchen admitting unexpected interest in chicken-roasting methods.

2. Movement Motivation – Move 26 in 26

• Winter Bingo Card: Gretchen introduces a bingo card to inspire new approaches to daily movement—small prompts that gamify exercise and help people stick with their 26-minutes-a-day goal.
• Gamification: Elizabeth highlights how the element of play (gamification) keeps her motivated:
  • “I love a bingo card. I love to gamify.” (05:16)

3. Try This at Home: Go for the No

[6:18]

• Concept: Reframe failure and rejection as positive progress. “Going for the no” means intentionally seeking out opportunities where rejection is possible, understanding that each “no” is a step closer to a “yes.”

• Research Basis: Dr. Joel Le Bon’s work is mentioned, which shows that focusing on rejections helps people remain resilient, motivated, and ready to try again.

  • “A no is a success. Yeah, you can succeed by failing.” – Gretchen (06:22)

• Practical Examples:

  • Jenna Fischer’s 49 Nos: As shared in her acting memoir, Fischer encouraged aspiring actors to collect 49 rejections, knowing that persistence would eventually yield a yes.
  • Tracking Unfinished Books: Gretchen applies the theory to her reading life, vowing to give herself credit for books she “fails” to finish as a means to value both success and strategic quitting.
    • “Now I’m thinking I should also keep track of the books that I don’t finish—give myself credit for the books that I don’t finish.” – Gretchen (08:19)

4. Happiness Hack: Email Organization

[14:02]

• Digital Hack from Mom:
  • Use email folders (in Outlook or other clients) to organize communications around trips, projects, or ongoing issues.
  • Both hosts note how rediscovering this basic tool brought noticeably less stress and more order to daily life.

5. Listener Question: Same-Day Book Recommendations

[16:05]

• Definition: Books you can start and finish in a single sitting—either because they’re brief or so gripping that you can’t put them down.

• The Unexpected Speed of Reading:

  • Gretchen shares the surprising fact that most people can read a 50,000-word novel (not even a novella!) in about 3.5 hours when reading straight through:
    • “You get up, have breakfast, go for a walk, read for an hour forty-five, take a nap, have lunch, read for another hour forty-five—you’ve finished a 50,000-word novel.” (17:12)

• Personal Approaches:

  • Both sisters recommend bringing a variety of books to reading retreats—some short and breezy, others more demanding or literary.
  • They discuss the particular pleasure of finishing a book on a flight or during a single, immersive day.

6. Same-Day Book Recommendations

[20:00+]
A rich, varied list spanning genres, cultures, and moods:

• The English Understand Wool by Helen DeWitt (Gretchen’s current top pick; best approached without spoilers)
• Foster by Claire Keegan (short, beautiful Irish novella)
• The Prime of Miss Jean Brodie by Muriel Spark (for fans of deep character studies)
• Heartburn by Nora Ephron (witty, semi-autobiographical divorce novel; “A hilarious divorce book, which you wouldn’t think you could pull off, but she does.” – Gretchen, 21:17)
• Murderbot Series: All Systems Red by Martha Wells (sci-fi, funny, and lovable AI protagonist)
• Happy All the Time by Laurie Colwin (light-hearted romance; “delightful book if you want something to make you smile”)
• Wise Blood by Flannery O’Connor (haunting Southern Gothic classic)
• Half His Age by Jeanette McCurdy (quick, controversial read about complicated relationships)
• The Summer Book by Tove Jansson (gentle, Nordic, intergenerational story)
• Elizabeth and Her German Garden and The Enchanted April by Elizabeth von Arnim (whimsical, emotional, and brief)
• Oh William! by Elizabeth Strout (literary, spare, set in New York)
• Different Seasons by Stephen King (long short stories, inspiration for several movies)
• The Devil Wears Prada by Lauren Weisberger (popular, juicy, and film-adapted)
• A Month in the Country by J.L. Carr (lucid and restorative; recommended for rediscovering the pleasure of reading itself)
• Piranesi by Susanna Clarke (short, twisty, and best entered with little foreknowledge)

Short Children’s & YA Books Rec’d:

• Charlotte’s Web, The Lion, the Witch, and the Wardrobe, Tuck Everlasting, Walk Two Moons, Graceling, The Hunger Games, Golden Compass

• “Children’s literature is a great way to do same-day books. Towering classics of world literature—so good, and yet you can whip through them.” – Gretchen (28:25)

Notable Listener Wisdom:

• Categorize recommendations for same-day books in stores or libraries (beach read, high literature, mystery, etc.) for easy browsing.
• “It might be fun on your reading retreat to say: I want one that’s a beach read, one that’s high literature, and one that’s a mystery…” (29:35)

Demerits and Gold Stars

Gretchen’s Demerit

[33:27]

• Not dressing warmly enough during an intense New York cold snap—despite owning all the proper gear! She resolves to dress “for the weather I have, not the weather I wish I had,” planning to layer up daily going forward.

Elizabeth’s Gold Star

[35:19]

• Awarded to herself and their mother for their epic errand-running bonanza in Kansas City, accomplished despite extreme cold and cleverly interspersed with fun activities and lunches.
• “It just evolved naturally… It is really helpful if you intersperse something you want to do with things that are just chores.” (36:17)

Notable Quotes & Moments

• On reframing rejection:
  “The more trial, the more error, and the more accomplishment…You succeed by failing.” – Gretchen (06:22)
• On recognizing habits:
  “If I could magically change one habit in my life, what would I choose?” – Gretchen (39:55)
• On the surprise of same-day books:
  “You’d be surprised by how much you can read if you just sat down and read a book.” – Gretchen (18:06)

Timestamps for Key Segments

• 05:27 – “Try This at Home”: Go for the No
• 07:16 – Research and practical examples of reframing failure
• 14:02 – Happiness Hack: Email folders for organization
• 16:05 – Listener question: What’s a same-day book? Reading retreat strategies
• 20:08 – Same-day book recommendations begin
• 33:27 – Demerits and Gold Stars

Wrap-Up & Listener Engagement

Listeners are encouraged to:

• Try “going for the no” in any aspect of life (reading, acting, personal challenges)
• Share their own same-day book recommendations, ideally with genre classification
• Consider mixing chores with enjoyable activities for better balance

End-of-Episode Reminder: Go for the No, and if you love the show, leave a review!
Newsletter: “Five Things Making Me Happy”
Next Reads: Elizabeth is catching up on Wolf Hall, Gretchen is reading Random Harvest.

Signature sign-off:
“Onward and upward!”