The Best (AND WORST) Band Names of All time

Summary

HardLore: Stories from Tour – Episode Summary

Title: The Best (AND WORST) Band Names of All Time
Release Date: January 9, 2025
Hosts: Colin Young (God's Hate) & Bo Lueders (Harms Way)

---

Introduction

In this engaging episode of HardLore: Stories from Tour, hosts Colin Young and Bo Lueders dive deep into the world of band names within the hardcore, punk, and metal scenes. Titled "The Best (AND WORST) Band Names of All Time," the episode explores the importance of a band's name, its impact on branding, and how it resonates with both fans and the broader music industry.

---

The Power of Band Names

[00:48] Colin:

"Names hold certain...so much power."

Both hosts agree that a band's name is a crucial element of its identity. Colin emphasizes that while the name can significantly influence perception, the music ultimately defines the band's legacy. Bo adds that the aesthetic and visual representation of a band name—through logos and imagery—play a vital role in creating a cohesive brand.

---

Criteria for Evaluating Band Names

Colin and Bo outline several criteria for what makes a band name stand out:

• Memorability: The name should be easy to remember and recognize.
• Alignment with Music Style: It should reflect the band's sound and ethos.
• Visual Appeal: The name should look good on merchandise, passing the "shirt test."
• Simplicity: Shorter names or those with clear syllabic structure tend to be more effective.

Bo mentions,

"It's one package. We're focusing mostly on one aspect of that package."

---

Top Best Band Names Discussed

1. Smash Mouth
   [02:38] Colin:

   "One of the best, hardest, most aggressive, most violent, most interesting, most powerful band names of all time is Smash Mouth."

   Colin humorously critiques Smash Mouth's name, suggesting it doesn't fit their actual musical style but still recognizes its memorability and impact.

2. The Misfits
   [04:27] Bo:

   "The Misfits, I think are especially for 1978. That's a perfect band."

   Bo praises The Misfits for their name's perfect encapsulation of their subversive and iconic presence in the hardcore scene.

3. Anthrax
   [11:43] Bo:

   "Anthrax is like an awesome band name."

   Both hosts acknowledge the boldness of Anthrax's name, associating it directly with their thrash metal sound and intense imagery.

4. Underdog
   [21:06] Bo:

   "It's a great band name. It looks sick. Good logo."

   The name "Underdog" effectively captures the band's spirit and message, resonating deeply with fans who identify with resilience and struggle.

5. Slayer
   [17:07] Bo:

   "It's scientifically, to me, the most perfect band name."

   Colin and Bo agree that "Slayer" is succinct, impactful, and perfectly suited to the band's aggressive style.

6. Bolt Thrower
   [33:15] Colin:

   "It fits them perfectly... one of the top three logos ever."

   They admire Bolt Thrower's name for its unique branding and strong association with their thematic elements.

7. Milspec
   [31:20] Bo:

   "Awesome name."

   "Milspec" conveys a sense of readiness and robustness, aligning well with the band's image.

8. Jawbreaker
   [80:12] Colin:

   "One of the hardest, most aggressive, most violent names in history."

   Despite sounding incongruent with the band's actual style, "Jawbreaker" is recognized for its powerful and memorable impact.

---

Top Worst Band Names Discussed

1. Metallica
   [05:51] Bo:

   "Metallica is a terrible band name."

   Both hosts criticize "Metallica" for its generic nature, feeling it lacks uniqueness despite the band's success.

2. The Beatles
   [14:25] Bo:

   "I hate it. It's a terrible, terrible name."

   Colin and Bo express disdain for the pun-based name, finding it less impactful despite the band's legendary status.

3. Alice in Chains
   [15:30] Bo:

   "Alice in Chains... horrible band name."

   They argue that "Alice in Chains" presents a negative and confusing contrast to its more whimsical counterpart, "Alice in Wonderland."

4. Death Cab for Cutie
   [08:24] Colin:

   "It's exclusionary of uglies that are dead."

   The name is criticized for its confusing and exclusionary connotations, making it hard to associate with the band's music.

5. Nine Inch Nails (NIN)
   [12:47] Bo:

   "Nin is almost a low... it's like... the crimson ghost of itself."

   They find "Nine Inch Nails" to be too generic and detracting from the band's unique sound and identity.

6. Pearl Jam
   [17:50] Bo:

   "Pearl Jam... it's sexual."

   Despite acknowledging the band's quality, they dislike the sexual undertones implied by the name.

7. Limp Bizkit
   [57:04] Bo:

   "Limp Bizkit is just... dumb."

   Both hosts find "Limp Bizkit" over-the-top and not reflective of genuine musical talent.

8. Butthole Surfers
   [79:10] Bo:

   "Yeah, that's bad."

   The name is condemned for its vulgarity, making it challenging to market and wear merchandise confidently.

9. Donnybrook
   [54:04] Bo:

   "Traumatic spelling and pronunciation issues."

   They point out the difficulties in spelling and pronouncing "Donnybrook," leading to marketing nightmares.

10. Goo Goo Dolls
    [61:32] Bo:

    "That's a rough name."

    The repetitive "Goo" is seen as silly and detracting from the band's musical credibility.

11. Jimmy Eat World
    [68:50] Bo:

    "It's impossible to associate with the band's music from the name."

    The name "Jimmy Eat World" is criticized for lacking clarity and relevance to the band's sound.

12. Weekend Nachos
    [81:05] Bo:

    "Nonsensical origin."

    The name is viewed as disconnected and confusing, making it hard to resonate with listeners.

13. Ass Suck
    [67:44] Bo:

    "Harsh language and negative connotations."

    This name is condemned for its vulgarity and off-putting implications.

---

Insights and Conclusions

Throughout the episode, Colin and Bo emphasize that while a strong band name can significantly enhance a band's brand and appeal, a poor choice doesn't necessarily doom the band if the music is exceptional. They highlight how memorable and well-aligned names with a band's identity can create lasting legacies, whereas confusing or vulgar names might attract attention but could also alienate potential fans.

Notable Quotes:

• Colin:

  "A bad band name can help you a lot of the time...if the music is awesome, like Weekend Nachos or Ass Suck..."
  [81:42]

• Bo:

  "It's one package. We're focusing mostly on one aspect of that package."
  [01:24]

---

Conclusion

HardLore: Stories from Tour delivers a comprehensive and candid exploration of band names, dissecting what works and what doesn't in the fiercely competitive music industry. Colin Young and Bo Lueders provide listeners with valuable insights into the significance of naming in building a band's identity, offering both praise and criticism based on their experiences and observations within the hardcore, punk, and metal communities. Whether you're a musician pondering a band name or a fan fascinated by the stories behind your favorite bands, this episode offers a rich and thought-provoking discussion on the art and impact of naming in music.

---

End of Summary

Transcript

[Colin]

This is like the first thing that came to mind.

[Bo]

Okay.

[Colin]

100 demons. You know what you're getting?

[Bo]

Hundred of them. You.

[Colin]

You hear 100 demons. You. It's. I mean, even if you don't know, that's like a famous tattoo book. You see 100 demons while they're playing, they've somehow multipl. Hello. Welcome. It's hard lore time. How are you, Bo?

[Bo]

I'm doing so well, Colin. I'm excited about today's episode.

[Colin]

Me too. This is a fun one. Band names are so important, you know.

[Bo]

Arguably one of the most important things.

[Colin]

And names in general, they hold certain. So much power. And with enough time, with enough talent, with enough greatness, the name ceases to mean anything other than the music.

[Bo]

Interesting.

[Colin]

Some terrible band names. You don't even think about the words anymore because the songs rock so hard.

[Bo]

That's a really good point. And you just made me think of one. See this episode, we're gonna. It's gonna be a little loosey goose.

[Colin]

Yeah.

[Bo]

Gonna be all over.

[Colin]

We're just having fun today.

[Bo]

Yeah. It's the new year.

[Colin]

It's the new year sometime. Sometimes a band name is so good that you know exactly what you're gonna get.

[Bo]

And sometimes.

[Colin]

Sometimes the band name is so bad, you know for a fact you never need to hear it.

[Bo]

One thing I would like to just have as a consideration for everything that we say is the, like, the aesthetic, the stylization of the word when written. Like. Yeah, kind of. I feel like a band name and a logo and an image kind of.

[Colin]

Is all one package.

[Bo]

It's one package. We're focusing mostly on one aspect of that package. But I do think, like, certain bands are like, oh, they got the name, they got the look and.

[Colin]

Yeah, no, I think. I think a band. A bad. A band name being bad sometimes is used in a good way.

[Bo]

Sure.

[Colin]

They. They know what they're doing with their band name sometimes where they're playing to the correct. Like, they want the guy in the spongebob shirt in the Minion shirt. The Minion. Oda Bob. They want the Minion. Oh, Dabob fan base. You know?

[Bo]

Yeah. That's disgusting.

[Colin]

And we'll get right into it. I'll start with what I think is one of the best.

[Bo]

One of the best. Okay.

[Colin]

One at. One of the best, hardest, most aggressive, most violent, most interesting, most powerful band names of all time is Smash Mouth. It does not fit. The band should have been used for Zing Bell, Ding Bells and breakdowns.

[Bo]

Yeah. Like horror, you know, Shattered Realm.

[Colin]

Should have been called Smash.

[Bo]

I fully, fully agree. I understand completely. That doesn't make any. I've never even thought about it.

[Colin]

It ain't right. Just. We gotta. We gotta have. Smash Mouth is gone now. The OG is gone.

[Bo]

Wow.

[Colin]

Shrek 5 is coming. And you know, rest in peace to the homie.

[Bo]

Yeah.

[Colin]

But we need a new Smash Mouth that is exclusively playing like UK Beat down music.

[Bo]

Man. I can't believe he died. I forgot. Was that this year?

[Colin]

I think that was last year.

[Bo]

Okay.

[Colin]

And after the unbelievable performance at the Chili Cook off or whatever. Rest in peace to the homie. We got it. We need a new Smash Mouth.

[Bo]

Wow. Smash Mouth is such hard as. I've never. I've never thought about that before. That's incredible.

[Colin]

Okay, so now Bo is gonna do a best and a worst and then I'm gonn worst.

[Bo]

So you kind of knocked it out of the park with that first best one. Because I. All of mine, I feel like, are a little obvious. Like obviously rock. I'm gonna choose what I think is my favorite band name of all time. And it's no coincidence considering how much we harp on them and everything I said about the aesthetic, the vibe, the look, the logo, the misfits. The Misfits, I think are especially for 1978.

[Colin]

Yeah.

[Bo]

That's a perfect band.

[Colin]

That was like the most subversive, evil thing you could call your man. That might as well have been a slur.

[Bo]

Yeah, right.

[Colin]

We don't like these misfits are.

[Bo]

We don't feel.

[Colin]

And it. So it sums them up so perfect.

[Bo]

It's perfect every. So everything about it. And it's. It's no surprise Glenn's. He's a genius.

[Colin]

Yeah.

[Bo]

But everything from the way it's like written, the Crimson Ghost, all of everything that we know about that I think is literally a perfect thing to go along with an actual perfect band.

[Colin]

Yeah, I mean, I think the. The. Their impact and their timelessness is 60% because of the imagery and the. And the name and the logo and.

[Bo]

All that we often talked about. Or it's come up several times in the van where like I think the Crimson Ghost is probably the most recognizable punk logo.

[Colin]

Probably because like it rarely has the word with it correct. When it's posted somewhere and you know what it is.

[Bo]

And like Black Flag, the bars are like the other next one. But then you think about like, well, whose reunions are filling up stadiums.

[Colin]

Yeah, sure, very true. So now give me a worst.

[Bo]

This is me being objective. This is me being transparent. This is this is. I'm baring my soul. I think Metallica is a terrible band name.

[Colin]

Horrible. I have it on my worst.

[Bo]

Listen, it's an awful band name.

[Colin]

Yeah. Truly, truly despicable.

[Bo]

It is.

[Colin]

But again, this is one of those things where it ceased to have meaning and now it just means the band.

[Bo]

So true. But it's also not a real word.

[Colin]

No, it's not.

[Bo]

So it's just like the. It's actually the most generic band name. Yeah, it's so basic. It's literally being like punkers, like. Or like.

[Colin]

I wonder if it's in the dictionary now.

[Bo]

Metallica. Yeah, I could. I guess it could be, but it's just like. I don't know. The only thing that's cool, especially about early Metallica, is that Hatfield drew the first logo.

[Colin]

Yeah. I think the only thing that's cool about it is that the name was worse. Imagine they were still called out. Wasn't the Alcoholica what they were called?

[Bo]

No, no. That was like a nickname they got because they're drinking. Became so infamous.

[Colin]

That's horrible.

[Bo]

If you have an Alcoholica bootleg shirt, though, you get in contact with me anyway. So, yeah, I think Metallica is just a terrible band name.

[Colin]

Gotcha. I'm gonna do a worst and a best. And let's. Let's be clear. I'm not. I'm not doing, like, intentional meme names such as the Kalosdao Boys.

[Bo]

Okay. Okay.

[Colin]

Which I actually think is very clever.

[Bo]

I also think that's kind of a cool name.

[Colin]

I'm not doing the World Is a Beautiful Place and I'm no Longer Afraid to Die, which. Listen, it's a terrible band name, but it worked for them.

[Bo]

Interesting.

[Colin]

They weaponized it to find the right audience and it like. No, there's no other name like that.

[Bo]

Okay.

[Colin]

I'm not doing bands like We Butter the Bread With Butter, you know, which is infuriating to this day. Makes me sick. Physically ill. I'm not doing band names like the Tony Toady.

[Bo]

No, you're not.

[Colin]

I can't even say. I'm not doing band names like the Tony Danza Tap Dance Extravaganza. You know?

[Bo]

Yeah.

[Colin]

If you're moshing. Never mind. I'm not doing bands like no Chunk. No. Captain Chunk. I'm not doing that. Not doing that today because those know what they're doing.

[Bo]

They're intentionally.

[Colin]

They're trying to rile me up.

[Bo]

Okay.

[Colin]

That.

[Bo]

I like that. That's the spirit of what we're talking about, is like.

[Colin]

I agree.

[Bo]

Yeah.

[Colin]

I will do. Bands like Death Cab for Cutie. You're telling me Ugly don't get a Death Cab to.

[Bo]

Damn.

[Colin]

Only Cutie gets her own Death Cab.

[Bo]

Cutie privilege.

[Colin]

Not only is it horrible, it's exclusionary of uglies that are dead. You know, who need a. I think that's ridiculous.

[Bo]

Yeah.

[Colin]

I do think it. All these fucking names suit them. Minus Smash Mouth. But this one has always pissed me off. And I like the band.

[Bo]

Oh, yeah. Yeah. Right. Transatlanticism is awesome, but I'm not.

[Colin]

But I see a Death Cab for Cutie T shirt.

[Bo]

Yeah.

[Colin]

And I'm reminded every time how awful it is.

[Bo]

And then ironically, they just go by Death Cab. Like, everyone calls them Death Cabin.

[Colin]

Death Cab. Great name.

[Bo]

Great name. They should rename themselves.

[Colin]

I would. I would guarantee you they would give anything to just.

[Bo]

That's a bad.

[Colin]

Now. I will do a best. Now.

[Bo]

Yes.

[Colin]

Let's see what from my sprawling list belongs on here. All right. This one's easy.

[Bo]

Yeah.

[Colin]

This is like the first thing that came to mind.

[Bo]

Okay.

[Colin]

100 demons.

[Bo]

Yeah, that's. That's a crazy.

[Colin]

You know What? You're getting 100 of them. You hear 100 demons. It's. I mean, even if you don't know, that's like a famous tattoo book. You see 100 demons while they're playing. They've somehow multiplied their Demonic, evil, scary, darkness.

[Bo]

It.

[Colin]

The logo. Perfect.

[Bo]

Yeah.

[Colin]

The songs fit the name. They're the hardest band ever. We've determined.

[Bo]

We've decided. Yeah.

[Colin]

So what other band would be worthy of there being 100 demons?

[Bo]

Great answer. I love it. I didn't realize the tattoo book thing. I didn't know that. Yeah.

[Colin]

And that was a Bruce Lepage. And I think what he said was the rest of the band didn't like it at first.

[Bo]

Oh, wow. Was there another.

[Colin]

You were right. Bruce was there.

[Bo]

Was there another name that you know of?

[Colin]

I don't think so. I don't know.

[Bo]

Interesting. It's always great to hear what. What band's first names were. I know we did. Were God's Hate. I know God's Hate and Twitchy Tongues are songs, but God said had a few.

[Colin]

When it started, it was just. We had one practice where we were called Dismantle.

[Bo]

Okay. It's not bad.

[Colin]

Which was. It's a word. It's a cool word. But it's like not a memorable band name. There was. There was like a local name, like a local hardcore band name that was going around from band to band, and everybody. Ultimately, nobody used it. It was Body Cast with a K. Okay. There were 15 bands that were almost Body Cast with a K, you know?

[Bo]

Yeah.

[Colin]

God's Hate for a second was one of the body Casts with a K. Wow. But I think. I think God's Hate was. It took a minute, but we figured it out. Twitching Tongues was always switching to.

[Bo]

Got it. Interesting. What about Dead Body? Holy blade.

[Colin]

The body was Dead Body immediately.

[Bo]

Yeah.

[Colin]

Because that. That was like. We want to name like dead guy. Dead body. One word. Okay, done.

[Bo]

That's sick. All right, so now I. It's one of my best. Right?

[Colin]

Yeah.

[Bo]

I. Let's see. Oh, here. I don't like this band and apart from one record, I think Anthrax is like an awesome band name.

[Colin]

Great name.

[Bo]

Great name. And kind of tells you exactly what you're going to get. I would expect a band with the name Anthrax to be thrash metal. That makes perfect.

[Colin]

Like, I also think having started as early as they did.

[Bo]

Yeah.

[Colin]

That was another thing where like that was probably so subversive just to be called that.

[Bo]

Right? Yeah.

[Colin]

And then like, that was extreme. That was Anthrax at that time. Like, motherfuckers were probably really scared of Anthrax.

[Bo]

What's that shirt?

[Colin]

I don't want to get Anthrax. I'm not listening to this.

[Bo]

Exactly.

[Colin]

So there was a risk, an inherent risk in being Anthrax. Great name.

[Bo]

I like among the Living. I like. I like some other stuff, you know, I'm just not a huge Anthrax fan.

[Colin]

But I love among the Living. I love. Dude, the. And I really like the. The re recordings with. With John Bush.

[Bo]

Oh, that's right. That's right. I remember you mentioning that.

[Colin]

Dude, they're hard as shit.

[Bo]

Yeah.

[Colin]

And his voice is incredible.

[Bo]

The Indians version is like the Indians mosh bar.

[Colin]

And the re recorded one is insane.

[Bo]

Yeah.

[Colin]

Yeah.

[Bo]

It's awesome.

[Colin]

They knew what they were doing.

[Bo]

They knew what they were doing. Absolutely.

[Colin]

Yeah.

[Bo]

So now I have a bad. Right.

[Colin]

Yeah.

[Bo]

Dude, this. This pained me. Nine Inch Nails.

[Colin]

Oh, yeah.

[Bo]

I think that's a disgusting. It's a really bad. Just a bad band name now. On the contrary. Nin with the reverse N as in like a box logo. One of the coolest things ever.

[Colin]

Yeah. And there's. There's bad names that work right now. Perfectly Suits their extremity. And like, we were like, we pointed out the other day, it's crazy. That pretty hate machine was 89.

[Bo]

89 kids so early, dude.

[Colin]

Unbelievable.

[Bo]

I. I guess it's supposedly the length of nails that they use. To crucify Jesus.

[Colin]

Maybe it's a great man.

[Bo]

I mean, if that's true, it's obviously a good reference.

[Colin]

But I. I don't. I don't dislike it at all.

[Bo]

I will say I hate.

[Colin]

I think it's gross. Because if it's a person with night.

[Bo]

Oh, yeah. I don't think it's.

[Colin]

That's too long. Yeah, it's simply too long. I don't. I don't agree.

[Bo]

But again, I think Nin is. It's almost a low. Well, it is a logo, but it's almost the crimson ghost of itself. You know, it's like. Yeah, just this thing and you know exactly what it is as soon as you see it, and it's awesome.

[Colin]

True. I'm gonna give you a best now.

[Bo]

All right.

[Colin]

And this thing, I. I think this is one of the greatest of all time. And clearly it worked for them pretty well. Band's pretty big. The Beatles.

[Bo]

Wow. Do you want to know B E A T brother. Do you want to know what's next on my worst list?

[Colin]

Is it the Beatles?

[Bo]

Yeah, dude. A pun, dude. A pun.

[Colin]

Yeah, it worked wonders for him.

[Bo]

Well, the Beatles, I. I get it. It's a pun.

[Colin]

They beat it up.

[Bo]

That's just.

[Colin]

It's genius.

[Bo]

I hate it.

[Colin]

And. And you know what? There was a mania around them, I think. Who knows if Beetle Mania would have been the same if they were called fucking the Silver.

[Bo]

No, they were something else. They were the. The Squirt. No, they were like the Silver or something. Or the. The Townsman or something. They were another townsman mania.

[Colin]

It's horrible.

[Bo]

Yeah, it doesn't work.

[Colin]

Beetle Mania. Be the Beatles, dude. The Beatles. That's a great name. There were all kinds of objects and animals that bands were named at the time. The animals, the monkeys. Touches the Beatles.

[Bo]

I.

[Colin]

It's genius.

[Bo]

Cannot stand this name because I think. I think it was probably clever for 30 seconds and then it's just like. Even if you take. Even if the pun aside, it's a bug. You're a bug.

[Colin]

You're like, turns out it's been clever for like 80 years.

[Bo]

Yeah, but that doesn't. There's lots of bands on my bad list who I think are incredible.

[Colin]

Oh, mine too. One of my next ones, actually.

[Bo]

But. Yeah, but literally, because Metallica, Nin, Beatles on my list.

[Colin]

Yeah, that's interesting.

[Bo]

That was the.

[Colin]

My next pick for bad band name is Alice in Chains.

[Bo]

Ah, that is also on mine. A few. Few down. Terrible.

[Colin]

That's terrible.

[Bo]

Because it's the antithesis of Alice in Wonderland is that.

[Colin]

Yeah.

[Bo]

Instead of In Wonderland, she's in bondage, she's in chains.

[Colin]

Like, come on, get her out of there.

[Bo]

Get out.

[Colin]

Get her out of those chains.

[Bo]

Horrible band.

[Colin]

Put her back in Wonderland.

[Bo]

One of my favorite bands of all time.

[Colin]

Of all time.

[Bo]

Unquestionably. But just such a bad name.

[Colin]

Just terrible. This is as bad as, like, Papa Roach to me, you know.

[Bo]

Wow.

[Colin]

That's Alice in Chains.

[Bo]

Alice in Chains.

[Colin]

But. But. And I don't even think about it anymore, you know, Alice in Chains doesn't mean Alice is physically in chains anymore. It means these beautiful tunes by these.

[Bo]

Geniuses, by these absolute wizards. Yeah. I mean, that's what all of this is going to boil down to. I don't know if there's many bad, quote unquote, bad band names who I dislike on here. Actually, maybe a few.

[Colin]

There's a couple on here.

[Bo]

What I think. I think this next one is my favorite band name of all time. I think it's. It's actually cooler than the Misfits. I think Slayer is a perfect.

[Colin]

Slayer's on mine as well.

[Bo]

It's just a perfect band.

[Colin]

It's genius.

[Bo]

It's genius. It tells you every. It's done. The way it's. It's stylized. Their vibe and aesthetic is insane.

[Colin]

It's. They made a short enough thing to carve on your arm perfectly.

[Bo]

Perfectly.

[Colin]

Or to yell at a guy across the street.

[Bo]

Two syllables and like, two.

[Colin]

Two syllables. Done.

[Bo]

Yeah, because you can't. You can't, like, all the time. Metallica, you know, but you go, slayer. Slayer. You know, it's awesome. Dude. Slayer is. Is probably the.

[Colin]

Slayer's way up there.

[Bo]

I think it's scientifically, to me, the most perfect band name.

[Colin]

Yeah. It's unbelievable. I've got. I've got. Man, I got some heat coming up.

[Bo]

Yeah. Yeah. All right. I got to do a bad one.

[Colin]

Yeah.

[Bo]

Oh, this is fitting. Pearl Jam. That's a disgusting, awful jizz, right? No, it's. It. Well, Lady Jizz. Oh, it's the other stuff.

[Colin]

Are you sure? Yeah, I feel like. I mean, I think male jizz is Pearl Jam as well.

[Bo]

Oh, I see. Because of the. Because of the color.

[Colin]

Yeah.

[Bo]

See, I always thought, God, we're getting graphic. But I always thought because of, like. Like a pearl is in a shell that opens and there's stuff in it.

[Colin]

You went way deeper than anybody in the band did.

[Bo]

Either way, it's sexual. No.

[Colin]

Yeah, I know. It's come.

[Bo]

And that sucks.

[Colin]

Yeah.

[Bo]

Like, That's.

[Colin]

But also, I don't know, a grunge rock band being like. Well, we can't call it Come.

[Bo]

I mean, I. I guess, but like, it's just yuck. Just yucky, dude.

[Colin]

It's like the, you know the Little John song with the skeet. Skeet Ski.

[Bo]

Yeah.

[Colin]

In there.

[Bo]

Yeah.

[Colin]

Like that's just on. That's crazy.

[Bo]

Yeah, it's just.

[Colin]

That was a hit. So. Pretty cool, you know, what Pearl Jam achieved.

[Bo]

I mean, and I get it too, because it's like we're rockers, we're jamming, you know, Like, I get it, but man, I'm not. I really, I really dislike it.

[Colin]

My next worst, the Killers.

[Bo]

Oh, yeah.

[Colin]

A bunch of fucking Mormons from Vegas.

[Bo]

Yeah. No, you're not kill.

[Colin]

You ain't killing nothing.

[Bo]

But you've done free will.

[Colin]

All liberalism.

[Bo]

All you did was make 14 year old beau. Trying to find Chicago hardcore legend the Killer. Impossible.

[Colin]

That's not gonna believe this. My next pick for best names, the Killer from Chicago, Illinois.

[Bo]

Dude, what an incredible band name.

[Colin]

It's perfect.

[Bo]

Who's the Killer? It's all of us.

[Colin]

It's all of them.

[Bo]

It's the band.

[Colin]

It's perfectly suited. They're the real Killer.

[Bo]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Colin]

They should take both, frankly. And the Killers obviously wrote many bangers.

[Bo]

Arguably, yeah.

[Colin]

Maybe one of the great rock bands of this century.

[Bo]

Maybe, maybe.

[Colin]

But the. And maybe it's a great name on its own, but for a bunch of Mormons, not really the Killer. Much like Slayer.

[Bo]

Yeah.

[Colin]

You know what you're getting?

[Bo]

You get it right off the rip. There's no question about it. Killer is one of the coolest hardcore band names for sure.

[Colin]

I agree. The Killer. And you ever watch Wendy Williams?

[Bo]

I know, but I know she is.

[Colin]

She uses the Killer as like an expression a lot. Or she'll be like, who's gonna get me? Like, the Killer's coming. I need to.

[Bo]

Oh, okay, okay.

[Colin]

Like it's one universal killer. And I think about the Killer every time.

[Bo]

That's great. I like that. One of my favorite and one of your favorites, Underdog. Oh, Underdog is such a sick band name.

[Colin]

It's on my list.

[Bo]

It's like they knew. Okay. I think Underdog was popular at the time, but I think much like into another. Maybe they knew it was going to take some time for people to like, get it.

[Colin]

Well, it's a. It's a guy crooning over a youth.

[Bo]

Crew, you know, that doesn't make it should be impossible.

[Colin]

Nobody else sounded like them.

[Bo]

Yeah, it makes no sense. But they were telling you, like from the rip, like, we're underdogs, like, it's not gonna work.

[Colin]

I mean, I think it was more of a. Like a metaphor of youth crew versus society and music and like their friends versus everybody.

[Bo]

Of course.

[Colin]

But my God, does it not sum up exactly what they're saying? Exactly what they are like the spirit of hardcore in general. I said the other day online that I think that moment in Back to Back where the singer of Underdog is telling the listener, you're the underdog, just like me, is one of the greatest recorded moments in the history of music.

[Bo]

To be free.

[Colin]

It's beautiful.

[Bo]

It is beautiful. It's a great band name. It looks sick. Good logo.

[Colin]

Oh, yeah.

[Bo]

Everything about him bad. What's a bad one? I gotta get rid of Alice in Chains.

[Colin]

Give me a bad one.

[Bo]

Oh, well, we'll stay in New York with youth group Gorilla Biscuits. It's a horrible band name.

[Colin]

Just. Just awful.

[Bo]

And like, I get it. I know it's a drug. I know it's Quaaludes or whatever. Fine. Clever.

[Colin]

It's also. It also works so well for them. They're one of the biggest hardcore mans and like to. To non hardcore people easily. And I do think a large part of that is like, well, that's a funny name. I should check that out.

[Bo]

Do you think Gorilla Biscuits is at all adjacent to penis music?

[Colin]

No.

[Bo]

Okay.

[Colin]

Not at all.

[Bo]

Okay.

[Colin]

No way.

[Bo]

Sometimes that sense of like the name.

[Colin]

Is penis adjacent for sure.

[Bo]

Okay. Okay. I'll accept that.

[Colin]

Yeah.

[Bo]

Yeah.

[Colin]

My next pick for one of the best is Xibalba, because.

[Bo]

What does it mean?

[Colin]

It's Mayan hell.

[Bo]

Come on, dude.

[Colin]

So they're literally a band full of proud Mexicans named after their personal hell.

[Bo]

Like their ancestral, their ancestors hell. It's un.

[Colin]

Fucking sick.

[Bo]

Yeah, it's.

[Colin]

It starts with an X, which you know, will help you in any kind of trivia type thing, which is great. I've always liked it. I've always been drawn to it. It's always been one of my favorite band names. I think it sums up their music perfectly. It's cool as fuck. It's hard. It looks it. And something we have not talked about once. One of the most important things for a band name is passing the T shirt test. A logo's gotta pass the shirt test.

[Bo]

Yeah. It's gotta pop Warhead on here, you.

[Colin]

Know that's gonna look sick as fuck on a shirt. Pearl Jam. Somehow they pulled it up, you know?

[Bo]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Colin]

Especially it just always looks good even by itself.

[Bo]

And like, the logo that they use is iconic at this point. It's perfect.

[Colin]

Yeah.

[Bo]

Yeah. I love it.

[Colin]

You got it. All these names must consider the shirt test interesting. Many fail.

[Bo]

Many fail.

[Colin]

Yeah.

[Bo]

Wow. I'll give you one of my favorite band names with some of the worst merch that exists. The Cure.

[Colin]

Oh, yeah, dude.

[Bo]

The Cure is a great band name. I don't. I think, you know, you get to the. The Doors, the. The Animals, the Beach Boy. Like, you get a little. It gets a little silly to be the anything. A name is a name, so I guess whatever. But the Cure sounds cool. That's. That sounds like something. It sounds like, important. You know what I mean?

[Colin]

And for it to be just a bunch of sad, depressed.

[Bo]

Yeah.

[Colin]

Low life, meth addicted rockers is fucking awesome.

[Bo]

It's the best.

[Colin]

Like, what is the Cure? Is the music the cure for melancholy?

[Bo]

Right?

[Colin]

You know, is death the cure for life?

[Bo]

Yes. Yes, yes.

[Colin]

Well, no, we'll never know.

[Bo]

But they have some of the worst merch I've ever seen in my life. There's a couple cool shirts and then.

[Colin]

Yeah, I mean, there's a couple bangers. I like all the weird, colorful stuff.

[Bo]

The weird colorful ones are fine, but a lot of them look like. Like somebody sneezed on paint or something. Or it looks like the food fight scene from Hook, you know? Like, it doesn't. There's just like nothing about it. But. But we're saying in like 2015, when you're playing Riot Fest, I think it's because they have been on a 360 deal forever and they don't make.

[Colin]

So they're just like. Well, they. I mean, they have a merch company making everything and they probably have zero input.

[Bo]

Yeah, it's crazy.

[Colin]

What are you gonna do?

[Bo]

What are you doing?

[Colin]

My next pick for a. Am I doing a worst? I just did a worst.

[Bo]

I just did a good. Yeah.

[Colin]

My next worst is Dance, Gavin. Dance.

[Bo]

Dude, what the fuck is that?

[Colin]

I don't want to see a man named Gavin do anything at all.

[Bo]

Nothing. Don't want to know.

[Colin]

Especially dance. I know this ain't for me just from this name.

[Bo]

Yeah.

[Colin]

Moving on. Just awful. Just nothing there for old Colin and there never will be. So, Gavin, you can give it a fucking rest now.

[Bo]

Just relax, brother.

[Colin]

Next best man name is Wartime Manor from Troy, New York.

[Bo]

Dude. Yeah. What. What does that mean?

[Colin]

I mean, is. Isn't Wartime Manor an expression about behavior and like human reactions during wartime? Oh, like your man bedside manner but like. But wartime man.

[Bo]

But isn't it spelled man or like a residence? No, no, it's manner. Like your.

[Colin]

Yeah.

[Bo]

Behavior. Oh, okay. Okay. Yeah. That makes total sense.

[Colin]

Hardest.

[Bo]

That's a great. Yeah. That tells you exactly what you're getting.

[Colin]

And the music. It's. The songs itself are wartime manner. They're ready for war. I know what my manner is while this is playing and it is war.

[Bo]

Interesting. Do you have a preference with like length of names?

[Colin]

I think. I think three syllables is the sweet spot.

[Bo]

Twitching tongues.

[Colin]

Two. Two or three?

[Bo]

Yeah, yeah.

[Colin]

Four is. Four is pushing.

[Bo]

Four is a lot. Totally.

[Colin]

Unless it's 100 demons. You know, then syllables don't matter because it's still short. It looks short.

[Bo]

It does. You're right.

[Colin]

Yeah.

[Bo]

Okay. Oh, dude. Here's one of the best ever. Death.

[Colin]

Oh, my God.

[Bo]

Holy shit.

[Colin]

Absolutely insane.

[Bo]

Nobody had that. Well, someone probably.

[Colin]

They kind of. They kind of invented it.

[Bo]

I know, but it's just funny to think that like Blue Oyster Cult I would put on.

[Colin]

Could have just been talking about the Grim Reaper but didn't call them bear their bad death.

[Bo]

You know, maybe they.

[Colin]

Maybe. I mean, I honestly think it was like. That's too scary.

[Bo]

Too far. Yeah. We can't do that to Black Sabbath is so on my list. I mean that. You know, we can jump.

[Colin]

Right. I often think about whoever figured out that Black Sabbath could make a cross because the A positions.

[Bo]

Yep. What if we lie? It's unreal.

[Colin]

Nobody's done it right since. Because those two words go together so perfectly. Who put those A's there? Who figured that was a geezer, you know? Was it Bill?

[Bo]

Was Tony. He's riffing.

[Colin]

You know damn well it wasn't Tony. His hand hurt that day.

[Bo]

He can't draw. He's got no fingers. Good answer. Or. Well, that.

[Colin]

All of them. That we're just. We're just ranting now.

[Bo]

Yeah. Here's one that I really don't like. But I love this band. I think Fallout Boy is one of the worst band names.

[Colin]

It's Simpsons, right?

[Bo]

Yeah. It's. It's what? Radioactive Man's partner is Mill House. Really?

[Colin]

Right.

[Bo]

Love the band. Sincerely. Like, I don't know. The band name just rubs me the wrong way.

[Colin]

Interesting. What's. I do think it like perfectly encapsulates them in a way.

[Bo]

You think so?

[Colin]

Which I think. I think that's what's most important at the end is that they sound like Fallout Boy. You see that picture of that guy going around the like, weird looking blonde guy? And people respond to it like. I don't know how to explain this, but this guy looks like the Offspring sounds.

[Bo]

Yes, Yes.

[Colin]

I think that Fall Out Boy's name. I don't. I couldn't see them as anything else, really. I think they nailed it.

[Bo]

I think they had to, like, change their name at one point, too. It was Fallout Boy, which is what the character was. And then they got in a little bit of trouble. Had to make it Fallout Boy. It was something. Something like that. They had to.

[Colin]

They stay getting sued. God damn.

[Bo]

But yeah, I just that. Hey. Love the band. Love it.

[Colin]

Yeah.

[Bo]

But that's just. That ain't for me.

[Colin]

One of the worst to me is the band Pupil Slicer. Relatively new. Ish. Man. They put out a record the same day as God's Hate. And I kept having to read people. They're.

[Bo]

They're good.

[Colin]

They're sick. I kept having to read Pupil Slicer over and over again. And I think it's so foul and rotten and disgusting.

[Bo]

Yeah. Don't do that.

[Colin]

I never want to see or hear it again. I wish them all the best. Name is great. The band name is not great. Band is sick. I can't stand looking at it. I think it's so gross. I don't ever want to think about it. So I think they've done a great job, if that makes sense.

[Bo]

Yeah. Right.

[Colin]

Absolutely. Foul. I hate it. Great job. My next pick for best name is Milspec from Toronto.

[Bo]

Is that military spec?

[Colin]

Yeah. It means like of the grade that would be used. It's ready for war, basically.

[Bo]

Awesome name.

[Colin]

This gun is Mil Spec.

[Bo]

Yeah.

[Colin]

And they're Canadians.

[Bo]

Yeah. How are they doing?

[Colin]

They don't know nothing about that, but they did it.

[Bo]

They did it. That's a good name. And I've.

[Colin]

Brilliant.

[Bo]

I like a name like Ms. Paint. I like a name that, like, isn't.

[Colin]

All there, you know that Ms. Paint didn't even think about that. They were from Mississippi.

[Bo]

Wait, really?

[Colin]

They didn't even process that. They were just called Ms. Paint. I think Taylor or Ian pointed out that it was Mississippi paint. And they were like, holy sh.

[Bo]

So I had it backwards. Then I thought it was Mississippi paint and they abbreviated and then it was like.

[Colin]

I mean, misses that. I'm sorry to break the fourth wall here. To Ms. Paint. If you're watching, you may be. It's genius.

[Bo]

It's.

[Colin]

It's accidental. Absolute brilliant.

[Bo]

Mississippi paint is hard as genius. It's an awesome.

[Colin]

It's like LA Dispute.

[Bo]

Yeah.

[Colin]

You know.

[Bo]

Yes. La.

[Colin]

Which they should have done.

[Bo]

Yeah. That's a good one. I mil spec. That's a good one. I'm on the biggest kick at the moment of crowbar and like man, what else do you need?

[Colin]

It's a heavy object only used for breaking and entering.

[Bo]

Yeah.

[Colin]

Moving your ass or hitting a motherfucker in the dome.

[Bo]

It's unbelievable. It's a perfect name.

[Colin]

Perfect band name. And also I love a. I think a seven letter band name where there's one letter in the middle.

[Bo]

Oh yeah.

[Colin]

Is a really cool sweet spot because you can like kind of bend it.

[Bo]

Around like low wise. You ever think about read.

[Colin]

Is a. Is A an asymmetrical.

[Bo]

Yes.

[Colin]

Amount of letter.

[Bo]

Right.

[Colin]

Which makes it.

[Bo]

So the B is dead dead center.

[Colin]

Good stuff.

[Bo]

That's cool.

[Colin]

Those are the things I think about.

[Bo]

Well, so have you ever thought about how. And there. This is on my good list. But I have a question mark next to it. I'm gonna skip ahead and take an extra turn because I don't know how you might feel about it. Bolt Thrower I think is a sick name. It's a tabletop like game. You know, like it's.

[Colin]

No, it's a. It's a. It's a thing from Warhammer.

[Bo]

I know. Which is a tabletop game.

[Colin]

Yeah.

[Bo]

So like, you know that. That like stained glass logo.

[Colin]

How does that over the logos maybe the greatest ever.

[Bo]

How does it look? Symmetrical. It's I don't know, four letters and then more letters that I can even.

[Colin]

It makes no sense.

[Bo]

It makes no sense.

[Colin]

But they figured it out. It is. I do think hearing the name Bolt Thrower as a kid was like. That's stupid.

[Bo]

Yeah. What is. What does that mean?

[Colin]

And it's one of those things that gets better over time. And I also think it's one of those things where the band is so perfect and every other. In every way that the name ceases to mean a guy throwing bolts or an object shoot firing bolts.

[Bo]

Yeah.

[Colin]

A ballista of sorts. And it just means the sick ass.

[Bo]

Man. I thought it was like Zeus when I. When I first heard it, you know, because he throws. Right. So I didn't get. Yeah, but talk about a logo. Just a crazy.

[Colin]

Just. That's all time.

[Bo]

How does that.

[Colin]

That's probably the top three logos ever.

[Bo]

Oh, interesting. Should I do a bad now I just did two.

[Colin]

Give me a bad.

[Bo]

All right. There's. Here's another question mark. 1. Colin, what is pink Floyd?

[Colin]

That's a great question. I know what I like in the wall is that Pink Floyd is the guy. His name is Pink Floyd.

[Bo]

Right.

[Colin]

He's the, like, fictional guy that all this is happening to that's going insane.

[Bo]

Right.

[Colin]

He's like the rock star crashing out. So I just think of it as that. As it's like. I'm sure it had some meaning before that. I've never looked it up.

[Bo]

Yeah, yeah.

[Colin]

But I like that the, like, characterization of it is that Pink Floyd is this confrontational, troubled rocker.

[Bo]

So my issue with it is if you. If you can actually separate it from a. The, like, dark side logo, which is incredible. And. And the music itself, which I love. It's like, if I had a band named Green Bill, it would be the same.

[Colin]

Oh, it's horrible.

[Bo]

It's a horrible name. It's a terrible, terrible name.

[Colin]

Absolutely horrible.

[Bo]

Okay, good. I'm glad. I'm glad you agree.

[Colin]

No, it's despicable. My next pick for Worst is an absolutely incredible band, but that I avoided because of their name at first. The band is My Dying Bride.

[Bo]

Yeah. It's a bad band name.

[Colin]

Maybe if I was around when they first emerged, I wouldn't have the stigma of, you know, there's stuff like My Children, My Bride.

[Bo]

Yeah.

[Colin]

Bride is used in a genre that I have no interest in. You know, My Dying Bride being, like, top five doom band ever was not something I thought they would be from their name alone. So I think it has aged poorly. More so that it was always bad. One of my favorite bands.

[Bo]

So, duh.

[Colin]

I'll gl. I'll gladly rock it. Passes the shirt test because I'll gladly rock it now. But that was a band I avoided because of their name. One of the best, to me is much like your last pick. This name already held so much power, and that its meaning is one of the hardest things I can think about. Deicide.

[Bo]

It's on my list. Yeah.

[Colin]

Killing a God.

[Bo]

It's.

[Colin]

That's the murder of a God.

[Bo]

It's as cool as it gets now.

[Colin]

Means their band as much as it does that.

[Bo]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Colin]

And every song is about that.

[Bo]

Right?

[Colin]

I mean, that maybe that there's an argument there that it's the best, most appropriate band name of all time.

[Bo]

Right. It's. It's literally like Death.

[Colin]

Side is what they're about, and it's who they are.

[Bo]

Yeah. Yeah. There's no aspect of them or Glenn or anything that isn't deicide.

[Colin]

I must kill God.

[Bo]

Yeah.

[Colin]

One way or another, I'm killing God. Whether it's by songs or burning this, cutting this thing in My forehead or just rocking.

[Bo]

It's a great, great pick. Great.

[Colin]

Unbelievable name I'm gonna get.

[Bo]

I had a theme going here. My last one was Crowbar. My next one's Nails.

[Colin]

Oh, yeah.

[Bo]

Nails. And you know what? I like that. All of us who aren't in nails write capital nails. Always.

[Colin]

Oh, you have to.

[Bo]

I love that.

[Colin]

Yeah. It is genius. There's so many puns that can be made out of it and that have been made out of it and it doesn't even matter.

[Bo]

Doesn't matter.

[Colin]

It's hard as nails.

[Bo]

And it's. It's. It's five letters. So you got that I. Right.

[Colin]

You know, like that nice I right in the middle.

[Bo]

And dude, the. The classic old English all in caps. It's. It's perfect. It is.

[Colin]

It's a perfect logo. It's a perfect name. Perfect band. Everything about it is so suited for them. Yeah. I mean, and it. That's one of those things that like the Misfits like fucking other names as well. That the name is. The names can carry the band sometimes.

[Bo]

Yeah. For sure.

[Colin]

Where it's gonna. It's gonna bring you to a different audience because they're like, there's a band called Nails.

[Bo]

Nails.

[Colin]

Okay, I gotta hear that.

[Bo]

Yeah. And it looks awesome. Like, that's a. It's a name on a logo that stands out. Or I should say a logo on a shirt. Yeah.

[Colin]

Passes the shirt test 100 big time. Yeah.

[Bo]

Here's a bad one. Corn with Corn with a K. One.

[Colin]

Of the worst ever.

[Bo]

That's a terrible band name, dude.

[Colin]

And it's perfectly suited for that.

[Bo]

Yeah, totally. You're. You're absolutely right. But like, if you think about. Even if you took away the K and the backwards are, it's horrible. It would just be Corn.

[Colin]

Like, like truly not one good thing about the name Corn.

[Bo]

No, nothing. Other than.

[Colin]

Nothing good to say other than that.

[Bo]

It'S just recognizable, you know, that's it.

[Colin]

Yeah, I guess.

[Bo]

I guess. But that's.

[Colin]

Yeah.

[Bo]

Yeah, that's what it should be.

[Colin]

Your co worker in the quarantine.

[Bo]

Yeah.

[Colin]

Who you can't wait to. Who just needs to take lunch at the same time as you, you know? Yeah. You're like, I gotta sit with Corn guy.

[Bo]

Got any shows coming up, man?

[Colin]

Oh, no, I don't.

[Bo]

Well, you let me know because I gotta get back. But I mean, I like Corn as the band. I genuinely like Corn. Saw the homie Monkey at your Erewhon.

[Colin]

At Erewhon.

[Bo]

You know, I think Corn is. Has. Has their Merits.

[Colin]

But I don't want any corn on my. On my entree.

[Bo]

Man. Is that a bad band name?

[Colin]

Horrible. One of the worst. To me. There's a. There's an epidemic in hardcore a few years ago.

[Bo]

Yeah.

[Colin]

With the letter Z replacing the letter S. Okay. It got out of hand. Okay. I'm not gonna name names. But if the Z.

[Bo]

What do you mean you're not gonna name names?

[Colin]

Replaces the S sound, you've done it wrong.

[Bo]

Right? It's.

[Colin]

If I'm reading your band name and I can't say the band name right because it's a fucking Z instead of an S. You failed. You picked the wrong one. You had a different word.

[Bo]

Do you have any.

[Colin]

Misery is the only one that works.

[Bo]

It did work. Yeah. Misery works.

[Colin]

Because that's as like a Z.

[Bo]

Right?

[Colin]

If I'm having to say Z instead of you've picked the wrong one. There's too many to name. And I forgot most of them because I hate them so much. So I can't name them. But it's out of control and they're mostly all good. Pardon this interruption. Bo. You know what I think would be a great band name?

[Bo]

What's that?

[Colin]

Manscaped.

[Bo]

Wow.

[Colin]

And you can. Guys can have that one for free. Though you may have some legal trouble because our longest running ad partner is manscaped.com. you get the best men's. And hair. Not even just men's. The best grooming products on earth.

[Bo]

Yeah.

[Colin]

You stink. You don't gotta stink no more. Use code HARDLOG at 20% off site wide.

[Bo]

Free shipping as well.

[Colin]

Free shipping. It's unbelievable.

[Bo]

And what's crazy is it passes so many tests. It passes the T shirt test.

[Colin]

The T shirt test. The ball smell test.

[Bo]

Yeah.

[Colin]

The foot smell test. Which you know is important.

[Bo]

The pit smell test.

[Colin]

The pit stank.

[Bo]

Stank.

[Colin]

And you know you're gonna. You. They all got all kinds of things for you. They got the scrubber, the preserver, the crop reviver. The duster. They got a foot duster.

[Bo]

You know what I found recently? I cleaned up my bathroom. I have an old bottle and I haven't opened it. Of the cologne. Manscape. Cologne.

[Colin]

They got cologne.

[Bo]

They got cologne. Refined. Smells great.

[Colin]

So whatever you need.

[Bo]

Yeah.

[Colin]

How do I tie this into balls? Whatever you need. Manscaped won't bleed you dry. With this incredible deal. Hard lore. 20% off.

[Bo]

He's talking good.

[Colin]

Mad vintage. Also brought you this episode. They got the best. Every band name on here. We probably just listed.

[Bo]

They got a shirt for this Guy right here. Perfect.

[Colin]

There you go. He got that from Luke. He wants your stuff too. So hit up Mad Vintage. Sell him your stuff. We'll buy it from you.

[Bo]

From him.

[Colin]

He will do it first, so we'll get it from him. And then every listener of this show will get everything that they ever wanted. Because there's grails you've been looking for your entire life on this site.

[Bo]

Right now that is mad vintage.com and I think I can share this. He's going to be at a couple of fests coming up this year to see stuff right in person. Get to check it out.

[Colin]

So. So you don't want him going there fully loaded. No, because everybody at the fest are going to buy everything you've ever been looking for.

[Bo]

Vultures.

[Colin]

You get it now, M. Game over.

[Bo]

Game over. Mad Vintage.

[Colin]

Game over. This episode is lastly brought to you by Guilty Party, the best menswear store in North America. Christmas has come. The new year has come and it's a new you. So if your resolution was to look better, dress better, be better, feel better, why don't you start with a new pair of pants?

[Bo]

Hey, what is better than a nice pair of slacks?

[Colin]

Literally nothing. Not a damn thing.

[Bo]

Damn. You're in the gig jeans for the show.

[Colin]

Absolutely. The Taylor shot himself in front of me. Don't ask. But my Taylor in general is Guilty Party.

[Bo]

That is very true.

[Colin]

This is a small business co owned and operated by a corpsman, the Drummer foundation champ. So you're supporting a hardcore guy. You're supporting a small business. You're supporting these brands and items that are built to last you your entire life. So quit throwing away your money on mall bullshit.

[Bo]

Yeah, yeah.

[Colin]

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[Bo]

And that's easy to do.

[Colin]

That is easy to do because that stuff is nice.

[Bo]

Nice stuff.

[Colin]

Back to the episode. Anyway, man name.

[Bo]

If you. If you watched any of any of these ads, comment baloney. I just want to see just one guy.

[Colin]

Just got to know who's making through who's making it.

[Bo]

Anyway, back to the episode.

[Colin]

My pick for one of the best is typo negative. And. And let me elaborate.

[Bo]

Okay.

[Colin]

I think the circumstance for which. So they were called Sub zero, right?

[Bo]

Which is the logo which is sub.

[Colin]

Sub zero.

[Bo]

Sub zero.

[Colin]

The O negative. Yes, perfectly applies. They all get it tattooed on them and then discover there's another sub zero.

[Bo]

Now pause. I'M being so well versed in like, the New York scene in like, crossover.

[Colin]

I mean, I don't even think it was that Sub Zero.

[Bo]

Oh, it was another. So I thought it was.

[Colin]

It could have been. I mean, Happiness Without Peace was like, what, 92, though. Maybe they had a demo or some EPS or some shit. I don't know.

[Bo]

It would just be crazy for them to not know of that band.

[Colin]

I agree. I feel like it was a different Sub Zero. I could be wrong, but continue to correct us.

[Bo]

Continue. They all got it tattooed.

[Colin]

They're Sub Zero. They all get it tattooed. Then they become Repulsion Already exists as well. Very famous death metal band. Typo Negative fits with the logo. Everybody thinks that that logo started with O Negative, but it was Sub Zero, right? He was driving, making that and like, it took the blood. It's a universal blood type, you know? Yeah, there's some. There's already something spooky in there.

[Bo]

Yeah, there is. You're right. He was driving and they were. There was the Repulsion era and he saw a billboard that said there was a blood drive. And it said, specifically, we need type O Negative blood. And he immediately, he went, oh, there's.

[Colin]

A live bootleg where he says in the set, we're not Repulsion no more. We're Typo Negative now. And I, I think it fits them perfectly.

[Bo]

Okay. When you put it like that, I like it. I had Typo Negative written down and I straight up like, like evp. Cody Rhodes, entrance in the middle. I couldn't decide if I liked it or hated it.

[Colin]

Oh, I love it.

[Bo]

I just couldn't decide.

[Colin]

I think it's so perfect for them. And the, the, the. The journey from, from how they got there makes it even better.

[Bo]

If you think about though, like, the thin logo across the shirt looks bad. Like that doesn't really pass.

[Colin]

It doesn't pass the shirt test. But that's why they, they were so deliberate with placing of it and, and all those shirts they did themselves and were so hands on with. Because that logo was tough to work around. And then the doing the oh was revolutionary. So that's theirs, you know.

[Bo]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. That's so cool.

[Colin]

Genius.

[Bo]

All right.

[Colin]

You've.

[Bo]

You've convinced me. I'm. Oh, here's. This is a good one that I know you'll like with a Z in it, but the way it should be. Crown of Thorns. Oh, my God, what a fucking band. It's perfect.

[Colin]

Now you talk about bands that I won't listen to because of their name. Crown Of Thorns is a band that I was like, I gotta hear this now.

[Bo]

Yeah. Whatever this is, I know.

[Colin]

I'm in. And then it was so different from what I was expecting.

[Bo]

Totally. Yeah.

[Colin]

And I was. And that made me even more obsessed.

[Bo]

Band names that kind of throw you for a little curveball are kind of.

[Colin]

Cool because it's worth not perfectly, like, explaining what's. What you're about to hear.

[Bo]

Yeah.

[Colin]

Crown of Thorns. Holy shit, dude. I mean, it's calling. Calling yourself a, like, street, stylized version of the thing. Jesus was crucified with his head on his head.

[Bo]

Yeah.

[Colin]

While being this, like, emotionally filtered, yet still aggressive.

[Bo]

Yeah.

[Colin]

Unique version that has never been replicated.

[Bo]

No, it's awesome.

[Colin]

Crown of Thorns. God damn. What a man. What a name.

[Bo]

Yeah. Really, really good band and one of my favorites.

[Colin]

Outstanding pick.

[Bo]

Here's a bad one. Pantera. Yeah, it's a bad band name.

[Colin]

The fuck you talking about?

[Bo]

What are you guys doing? You guys are from Texas? What are you doing?

[Colin]

Just call yourself Beer or something.

[Bo]

Yeah, what's funny is, like, they could have called them, you know, late 80s, could have called themselves the Panthers. I'm not saying that's cool. So I guess Pantera is, like, more unique, obviously, but, like, bands like the Scorpions, whatever, that existed, like, heavy bands like, that existed. But the fact that on that first on Metal Magic, there's just a shitty drawn panther.

[Colin]

Yeah.

[Bo]

And it. So it is like. Oh, no. You just literally meant panther in Spanish.

[Colin]

Yeah. It's brutal.

[Bo]

That's terrible, dude.

[Colin]

It's no good. But obviously it worked out.

[Bo]

It worked out. I mean, by the time they got the, like, Much like corn. By the time they got the Vulgar Display logo. Big P, big A. All right, I'm in. I think it looks awesome.

[Colin]

I mean, that's on Cowboys, too, right?

[Bo]

It might be. Yeah. It's just smaller. But, like, if you. If you were to say, like, hey, we're gonna start a band called Pantera, I'd be like, what?

[Colin]

Well, we can't do that. We're not using that at all.

[Bo]

It's normal.

[Colin]

And what's your next idea?

[Bo]

Yeah, right. You got any other brain busters? Yeah, yeah, go.

[Colin]

Okay. One of the worst to me. And this, this. I want you guys to take this with you, because this is still happening to this day. Anything ad that isn't damnation.

[Bo]

Interesting.

[Colin]

No more ads. We're past it. I know that. I. You know, bands had to do it legally to, like, get out of being the same name ghosted bc, which was.

[Bo]

Very creative, very Creative. Yeah.

[Colin]

But no more. Okay? It's over. Change the name. Vayne did fm, which was. That's like their whole brand. It's genius. There's other methods now you can do. Yeah, no more A.D. it's over. But you know, it doesn't mean anything.

[Bo]

American Nightmare changed their name. And one could arguably say that really.

[Colin]

Fucked up the band America Nothing.

[Bo]

No, well, American Nothing was super brief, but then.

[Colin]

Oh, give up. Was. Was. Yeah, I mean, that's. I thought they were two different bands straight up.

[Bo]

And one could say that, like momentum wise, that that probably hurt the band. I can't imagine that being for sure.

[Colin]

I. I mean, I'm not saying get a new name if it's taken. I'm saying be more creative in the beginning and then you won't have this problem.

[Bo]

Aha.

[Colin]

Don't just take another band's name and.

[Bo]

Add AD you know what? AD is perfect, though? Angel Dust.

[Colin]

Oh, it's. I mean, that's different.

[Bo]

Of course. I'm being cheeky, but like that logo. The. Like a. With the D. Like the. The two diamond.

[Colin]

Their. Their initial logo with the. With the. The, like their actual logo.

[Bo]

That's what I'm saying. Yeah. It looks like a four almost. That's. That thing is incredible.

[Colin]

It's genius.

[Bo]

It is genius. Love that.

[Colin]

Genius.

[Bo]

All right.

[Colin]

One of the best to me.

[Bo]

Yeah.

[Colin]

I think may. Sometimes I think this is the best band name, but maybe it's a little too art.

[Bo]

Okay.

[Colin]

And people don't always know the band name is Trypticon.

[Bo]

Explain it. I don't think I know you know.

[Colin]

What a triptych is.

[Bo]

Yes.

[Colin]

A three part piece of art.

[Bo]

Aha.

[Colin]

Hellhammer, Celtic Frost. Trypticon. It's him in the name, saying like, this is the final piece to my. This is the final piece of my masterpiece. It's all one story. This is the ending.

[Bo]

Wow. That's genius. It's a pretty good one.

[Colin]

It's genius. And it's the best one, turns out, you know.

[Bo]

Is it spelled? Is Trypticon like the actual word? The same spelling as the band name?

[Colin]

No, it's C. It's C. I think triptych is ch.

[Bo]

Okay.

[Colin]

Yeah, but he did. He made it a K hard. And added, you know. And added on.

[Bo]

Yeah.

[Colin]

Which, like. Which just turns it into this fucking like monster. It sounds.

[Bo]

Yeah, it does sound. It sounds very monstrous.

[Colin]

So cool.

[Bo]

I like that. One of my favorites. And this was. I was watching. There's a like a three hour compilation of YouTube on YouTube of like Sting transferring from Surfer to, like, Wolf Pack late.

[Colin]

Oh, yeah.

[Bo]

Sting. Like, just the whole story. Right? And in one of the. In one of the times when there's a fight breaks out, Tony Schiavone says, we have a Donnybrook. Donnybrook is a sick band name.

[Colin]

Outstanding.

[Bo]

And that's like. Like, especially I. I don't know who thought of that. Like, what? Like, where did that come from? Because that's not a term that's used.

[Colin]

No, but, you know, Martina and Dre be reading. Those are two learned motherfuckers. Smart guys. Bo Thompson was in the band as well. It could have been a Bo Thompson thing. I don't know. I'll get the answer. Here's the answer to who came up with the band named Donnybrook?

[C]

Okay, I suck at this.

[Bo]

Sorry.

[C]

But I'm gonna do my best. All right, so the name Donnybrook. Our guitar player, Pat, who I basically know my entire life because him and my brother who sings in the band, they've been best friends since probably kindergarten or something like that. So I've known him my whole life, pretty much.

[Bo]

Anyways.

[C]

Him and our second vocalist, Bo Thompson, they both. They both grew up playing hockey. And. And a bunch of our neighborhood friends, like our first merch guy, California, in Sean Riley, who put out our first EP, 1917 Records. I don't know, for whatever reason, a bunch of our neighborhood homies all grew up playing hockey. And so a Donnybrook is when there's a hockey fight between two teams and the bench is clear. So it's just a big ass fight. And I don't remember which one of the guys actually suggested the name, but, yeah, we ended up using it because of that. We thought it was cool. Which ended up being kind of a nightmare at the beginning because no one knew how to spell it because nobody knew what it was. So it got butchered so many times.

[Colin]

There's.

[C]

There's like, embarrassing flyers out there where it's spelled completely wrong. And two. Two different words and all this, which is crazy because it's like you just do, like, the slightest bit of research and you can figure out what the band name is. But anyways, yeah, that's it.

[Colin]

Outstanding. Thank you. Probably Martinez.

[Bo]

All right, what do I got here? Ah, here's one. And this is. By his own admission, he hates the band name Foo Fighters. Yeah, that's a bad band name, dude. It just is.

[Colin]

And he said himself, unless Christopher Walken is saying it before you play on snl, it's a terrible band who fights.

[Bo]

He said himself that if he knew the band was going to become such a thing, he would have never named it that.

[Colin]

Yeah, it's rough.

[Bo]

It's a bad band name.

[Colin]

Foo Fighters. Especially if you live in the Valley, man, that could get you fucking killed, you know?

[Bo]

Who are you fighting?

[Colin]

You better be. You better be careful. Fighting them fucking kill you. Anyway, one of the worst to me, to all, hopefully, is Limp Bizkit.

[Bo]

Oh, yeah, that was. I almost wrote that after Korn. Absolutely, dude.

[Colin]

Just absolutely abominable. It defines this era of music that. Where this is really the beginning of the death of rock.

[Bo]

Yeah.

[Colin]

You know.

[Bo]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Colin]

Guitars died.

[Bo]

Somehow Kid Rock is a cooler name than Limp Bizkit because that's just a.

[Colin]

Guy that sounds like a cool rapper, which he was.

[Bo]

He was at the time. Yeah.

[Colin]

Now he's like the most racist, hateful guy.

[Bo]

The worst person the Limp Bizkit.

[Colin]

The guitar player looks like.

[Bo]

Yeah, a monkey devil.

[Colin]

It's something, you know.

[Bo]

Yeah.

[Colin]

He looks like cgi while you just have a guy from Moorpark rapping over fucking Drop G. There's nothing good here.

[Bo]

No, there's nothing.

[Colin]

There's not. Nobody benefits from Limp Bizkit being called Limp Bizkit.

[Bo]

What is that band, Colin? It was right around that time. Sweat baby, Sweat baby Sex to the Texas.

[Colin]

The.

[Bo]

Blood Hung Gang. That is just like. I feel like there was an era of late 90s, early 2000s, where it was just like, I don't know what's around. Pick.

[Colin]

Yeah, Pick.

[Bo]

That Bloodhound Gang is actually better than I thought.

[Colin]

Bloodhound Gang is a sick.

[Bo]

It's kind of a. It's kind of a sick name.

[Colin]

And that song is unbelievable. It's the era of music where it's the smash mouth era of music where it's like, no, guys, don't worry. We're not focused on writing things that are good anymore. It's all like. It's. It's like the beginning of memes.

[Bo]

Yeah, yeah.

[Colin]

Commercial where it's like they're. They said, what?

[Bo]

Yeah, what?

[Colin]

Rather than like, oh, that song is good.

[Bo]

I saw someone. It was on, like, the Charlemagne Podcast. I forget which rapper it was, but they realized that Eminem is Eminem for Marshall Mathers. Like, they didn't.

[Colin]

That's a smart name.

[Bo]

It's a smart name, but it's. It's funny to think that, like, who said worse than Eminem at the time? Who said more like. Right. He still is very creative. Limp Bizkit is just. Oh, yeah, I'm totally. That was also the total, like. Like dad. Like Limp Bizkit. I got one of those.

[Colin]

Yeah, exactly. Which I got. I got one of those coming up. That's drove me fucking crazy. But before that, one of the greatest ever. Perfectly describes the band. I think about what it was, what it had to have been like to call your band this in the early 80s. Turns out they were the hardest, baddest motherfuckers around. The merch, the imagery, the songs, they had it all. Suicidal Tendencies.

[Bo]

What a fucking name.

[Colin]

Good God, dude. They had it all.

[Bo]

They had it all.

[Colin]

And it was, to this day, suicidal. On the bottom of the hat.

[Bo]

Come on, dude.

[Colin]

They figured it out, man. That. That's like Misfits esque.

[Bo]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Colin]

Branding and thought going into what you. What you is will ultimately determine the course of your entire life with this band.

[Bo]

And the fact that it wasn't just like, the band, like, there was like, their. Their guys. Yeah. You know, like, that's fucking awesome. That's really.

[Colin]

The. The no Effects book. There's a couple, like, short stories about the suicidal guys. Pretty early hard motherfuckers.

[Bo]

Yeah. Yeah. I love shit like that. No effects. I remember when I was a kid, the rumor was it was no fucking Straight Edge, no fucking X.

[Colin]

Which instead, it was just. They wanted it to sound like Negative Effects.

[Bo]

Yeah.

[Colin]

Which is really cool.

[Bo]

Which is. Yeah, it's fucking awesome. Here's me being objective, Colin. This is me being so fair. I think one of the coolest band names of a band that I hate, Primus.

[Colin]

Oh, my God.

[Bo]

I think Primus is a sick band name. Like, I have. It's so cool and somehow it fits them perfectly. Like, I have no. I have no qualms with, like, their imagery. I don't. That doesn't bother me. Everything else bothers me, but. But, like, the name and the. In the way it's stylized and kind of, like, weirdly written and shit. I think it's awesome.

[Colin]

Perfect name, perfect band, perfect discography. Willy Wonka covers included. All bangers now.

[Bo]

Anyway, one of the worst, but one of both your. My favorites, I believe. The Goo Goo Dolls. Oh, man, that's a rough one, dude. That's a rough name.

[Colin]

It's tough now, you know? And, like, I ain't wearing Goo Goo Dolls, you know?

[Bo]

And. And they started out as, like, a hard rock band and they were Metal Blade Records. Metal Blade Records. Were they from New York? I think they were from Buffalo. They were from Buffalo. So it's like, yeah, New York Dolls. Surely they were aware of. Was it a Play on that Goo. And then a boy named Goo. And just all this, like. What's your. They're obsessed with goofy.

[Colin]

I don't know, man. Goo Goo. Why did it have to be twice, you know? No, like Mighty. Mighty Boss Tones. I'm not. I'm not even. I wasn't even gonna bring it up. Don't get me started. That's a fucking band.

[Bo]

That's an incredible band.

[Colin]

Boss Tone. Alone.

[Bo]

Yeah. Alone, yeah.

[Colin]

Brilliant.

[Bo]

Because they're Bostonians.

[Colin]

Bought from Boston.

[Bo]

Yes.

[Colin]

Mighty Boss Tones. Genius. You add mighty. Mighty. You know. It's the best. God, Vince.

[Bo]

Vince McMahon falling off the chair.

[Colin]

Like, unreal.

[Bo]

Same unreal.

[Colin]

Goo Goo. You get worse. The Dolls. Great. The Goo Dolls. What? The Goo Goo Dolls. Kill yourself.

[Bo]

Great songs. Horrible band name.

[Colin]

Just awful.

[Bo]

One of the best rock bands of the 90s, surely. Easily, yeah. Without. Without a doubt. But God damn easily.

[Colin]

All right. One of the best man names. Shy Hulude.

[Bo]

Interesting. So now you know.

[Colin]

I didn't know I would have given it to any other band.

[Bo]

Total. Yeah.

[Colin]

And then it would have really rocked. But the. But being the fucking worm from Dune. Objectively sick.

[Bo]

Pretty sick. And also, it's like they either sat through the David lynch movie or they read that shit. You know what I mean?

[Colin]

Like, yeah, I would imagine. I mean. Yeah. Who knows? Probably both.

[Bo]

Probably. Possibly both. For sure.

[Colin]

They were before their time.

[Bo]

Pretty good band name, I'm not gonna lie. Especially now that, like, I've seen Dune, I never read it prior to movies.

[Colin]

So you've seen the Shy Hulu at work. You've seen them do their thing.

[Bo]

I seen it. It was crazy.

[Colin]

They. A lot of. A lot of different singers riding those worms, you know?

[Bo]

All right. That was clever. All right. Is it my turn?

[Colin]

Yeah.

[Bo]

To a good one. Kind of getting down to the. Oh, Colin is gonna rock you, dude. Oasis.

[Colin]

Oh, man. Outstanding.

[Bo]

That's a perfect band name. Five letters. Looks great.

[Colin]

Five letters. Just looks and sounds cool.

[Bo]

And also, like, who doesn't want to go to an Oasis? Who doesn't want to experience.

[Colin]

I've never experienced one. Personally. I would love to.

[Bo]

I would love to.

[Colin]

Yeah.

[Bo]

And truly.

[Colin]

And it's. It's a cool metaphor for, like. All music sucks. You're surrounded by this. That sucks. Here's this one beautiful thing. Here we are at the end of the road.

[Bo]

Come on, dude.

[Colin]

It's beautiful.

[Bo]

Yeah, it's a great band name. I love the logo. The lowercase logo of the 90s was definitely played out. Definitely like a thing at the time. Just the style yeah, but. But it's perfect. I have no quality.

[Colin]

Never. Not cool. In their case, yes.

[Bo]

And now the opposite. We're sticking aquatic. The Beach Boys. I'll drive myself off a cliff. Dude, I love Pet Sounds, you know what I mean? Like, I have no issue. Yeah, but, dude, it's so stupid. Dude.

[Colin]

It's of the time, you know?

[Bo]

But of the time. You have, like, I don't know, Credence and Jefferson Airplane. You have names that are at least like.

[Colin]

Yeah, but what is Credence Clearwater? Revival?

[Bo]

Well, it's. It's like a. A baptism revival.

[Colin]

I guess that's pretty cool.

[Bo]

You know what I mean? And you have. You have, like, Even the Jimi Hendrix Experience is cooler than the.

[Colin]

Yeah, but, dude, the Beach Boys, are they not telling you exactly what they're all about?

[Bo]

Not by the time, like, Pet Sounds and stuff came out the early on. Sure, sure.

[Colin]

That's what I'm saying. They can evolve musically. But they were some fucking boys at the Beach.

[Bo]

They were. But, God, do I hate.

[Colin]

You got to remember, this is pop music.

[Bo]

I'm fully aware.

[Colin]

So this is the same thing as Backstreet Boys and NSYNC at the time. So, like, they're going for. We got to sell some fudgeing records. How about the Beach Boys? We want to be on the radio.

[Bo]

I understand that. That doesn't mean that the name's sure forgivable. You know what I mean?

[Colin]

I think it's perfect for them.

[Bo]

You. But you also had bands at the time that were kind of doing the same thing, like the. The Beatles and like the Rolling Stones and. You know what I'm saying, like, you. There are other band. Or the Doors is even, like, a cool band name, I guess if you're not talking about a door, you're talking about, like, possibilities, you know, where the.

[Colin]

Maybe. I like the Beach Boys. I like that.

[Bo]

Okay. That's our first big disagreement. Beach Boys.

[Colin]

Yeah. No, there was one other one I like. There's something else you said.

[Bo]

Oh, Fall Out Boy. It was Fall Out Boy.

[Colin]

Fall Out Boy. I like Fall Out Boy.

[Bo]

That's right.

[Colin]

And you hate the Beatles. Yeah, I think it's a genius name.

[Bo]

Okay.

[Colin]

Another name I think is absolutely brilliant. Stormtroopers of Death.

[Bo]

Dude.

[Colin]

Sod. Stylized. Either way is cool as fuck.

[Bo]

Got a kind of crazy.

[Colin]

Yeah, very crazy. The fact that it's still working for them to this day. Nobody. I'm sure there was some kind of fuss about this at the time, right?

[Bo]

Probably not at the time, but now.

[Colin]

For sure. But now My God. Is it cool?

[Bo]

Yeah, it's. It. That's a great, great band name. I went through a phase where I was like, really into sod. I've kind of forgotten it'll.

[Colin]

And once you pop it on, you're like, yeah, this rock.

[Bo]

Yeah. This guy. Yeah. Let's see. I'm getting down to the. The nitty gritty here.

[Colin]

Yeah. I don't have many best, so I've got a ton of worse. Oh, I didn't say it worse.

[Bo]

Yeah, do it worse.

[Colin]

This is one that is. It's an incredible band. It does not pass the shirt test. Even though they've added the fucking umlaut to make you think it doesn't say that. Assuk.

[Bo]

I don't get it. It's a terrible.

[Colin]

Ass suck is an abominable name.

[Bo]

It's a terrible band name.

[Colin]

It literally means ass to suck ass.

[Bo]

That's. That's what. That's where they got it from. That's it.

[Colin]

Yes.

[Bo]

What are you doing?

[Colin]

Great band. I'm not saying Asuk. I know what you're doing.

[Bo]

Yeah, right? Yeah.

[Colin]

Yeah. Ligma. Ligma. Ass band name. I ain't saying that it's league me, but God, what a band.

[Bo]

I think that's a really good one. That might be the pound for pound, like worst name. Best band.

[Colin]

Yeah, maybe.

[Bo]

You know, it's one of them. One of them.

[Colin]

Ass Suck. Sickest man. Worse. It's called Suck Ass. That's how you know you rock, dude. That's like. That's like playing breakdowns in East Standard.

[Bo]

True. Yeah.

[Colin]

You know, if they're still hard. You're pretty good ass. You suck ass. Oh, you're the best man.

[Bo]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Colin]

Okay. You're good.

[Bo]

Great point. Let's see what's a bad one. These are one of my last ones. Oh, Jimmy Eat World.

[Colin]

It's one. It's coming up for me. Absolutely fucking abominable.

[Bo]

One of the greatest American bands ever, period. I have no issue with that. But period. And Taylor told me. I guess it's like a story.

[Colin]

It was a draw.

[Bo]

Draw.

[Colin]

Like his little brother.

[Bo]

Yeah.

[Colin]

And it was of him eating the world.

[Bo]

Eating the world.

[Colin]

But as a band name, I've hated it since day one.

[Bo]

This is day one.

[Colin]

Yeah.

[Bo]

There's. There's zero. There's no excuse. There's just no excuse for that change. Jimmy.

[Colin]

Great pick.

[Bo]

And then one of my last good ones. Oh, this is fitting. I think the name Slipknot is awesome.

[Colin]

It is a good name.

[Bo]

It's a good Name.

[Colin]

Yeah. It's just a, like, technique of which to.

[Bo]

Yeah.

[Colin]

Tie a rope. Just.

[Bo]

Just to fasten something to your truck. You know, like, it's not.

[Colin]

But it sounds.

[Bo]

It sounds.

[Colin]

And. And like, them carrying it and the imagery of it has added power to it.

[Bo]

I don't know if there is a better example of, like, whole band in costume. You know? Like, gore is obviously crazy, but, like.

[Colin]

There'S nothing even close.

[Bo]

No. Yes.

[Colin]

They're. That the way.

[Bo]

Yeah. The way they did that. Come on. Dude. And it fits. It fit somehow with the slipknot thing and. I don't know.

[Colin]

Totally agree.

[Bo]

Perfect.

[Colin]

Great. Name one of the worst names. And this is only because of, like, I really like this name in theory, but what wearing Sick of It all shirts did to me in high school made me realize that I hate it.

[Bo]

I don't love that.

[Colin]

I couldn't wear that motherfucker to school without some teacher being like, me too, buddy. Oh, oh, oh, oh. Are you Sick of it all?

[Bo]

You're tired? Yeah. Yeah.

[Colin]

Which, I mean, it's. There's got to be a better way to say it than Sick of it All. It's too many words. Something German about it. You know?

[Bo]

Sick of it all it reminds me of. Meaning no disrespect. Reminds me of Birds in row.

[Colin]

Yeah.

[Bo]

Which I think they're Belgian, I think.

[Colin]

Yeah.

[Bo]

That's just like an inch. Like a. Huh.

[Colin]

It's not for me. Sick of it.

[Bo]

Sick of all.

[Colin]

That's it. Sick of all Sick of all Sick of it all Just feels like one too many words.

[Bo]

Wow.

[Colin]

Great band. One of my. One of my favorites. Blood, Sweat, no Tears. Mount Rushmore. Just look around. A different Mount Rushmore. Fantastic. The name got me heated in school. One of the greatest names of all time that perfectly describes, encapsulates and. And let you know what this band is all about. This is a band whose logo and name I think helped them cross over a little bit while they were very briefly active. Righteous Jams.

[Bo]

Interesting.

[Colin]

That's an unbelievable name. They were called Invasion, which is also sick.

[Bo]

Invasion.

[Colin]

Change their. Changing your name. Like. No. We're Righteous Jams now.

[Bo]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Colin]

Is like, trust me, this is going to work.

[Bo]

And the song is. Invasion used to be this band, but now we're playing Righteous Jams.

[Colin]

Dude. What a. What a fucking mission statement. It's incredible.

[Bo]

You're not wrong.

[Colin]

I. I love this band name. This is a thing that, like, I know people who have, like. I don't listen much hardcore, but I heard Righteous Jams because I liked the shirt or something.

[Bo]

Oh, interesting.

[Colin]

Which is like, as a. As a marketing tactic. Unlike the Kalisdow Boys.

[Bo]

Yeah.

[Colin]

We butter the bread with butter. Tony dance. Tap dance. I can't say that word. I can't say that name. Tony tap dance extravaganza. Tony Danza. I can't say it. I hate it. Unlike those Righteous Shams was about what they were doing, you know, it became both an adjective and a noun.

[Bo]

Yeah, right, right, right.

[Colin]

They're playing the rights of Shams. That they are.

[Bo]

Yes. It's good. Yeah, it's pretty. You're right. I didn't think about that.

[Colin]

Fantastic.

[Bo]

When I was making my list, I was trying to think of, like, which Cleveland band I think has the coolest band name. And Integrity is really funny because it doesn't fit them at all. Integrity sounds like the band that, like, everyone in have Heart was in prior to it.

[Colin]

Sounds like a youth group.

[Bo]

Sounds like a youth group band. Like a collegiate youth crew band, which is just like. That's a funny.

[Colin]

Where Ringworm is like a cool, gross thing.

[Bo]

Yeah.

[Colin]

But Confront is like the sickest band.

[Bo]

I'll do you one better. I think One Life Crew as a band name, I guess as a band name. We're just talking name.

[Colin]

Confront.

[Bo]

Dude, Confront is sick.

[Colin]

But Confront is crazy.

[Bo]

But Confront would have one life on their shit. It's the same as Suicidal Tendencies. Yeah, that's sick.

[Colin]

But One is still great to this day.

[Bo]

Yeah, sure. You know, we're just talking about the name. Yeah.

[Colin]

One of the. Well, you. Did you do it worse?

[Bo]

No, let me. I'm probably done after this. Oh, here's this. Pains me to say it too, because I think it makes sense as a name, but Third Eye Blind is just like a dumb name that.

[Colin]

That unlike. Sick of It All.

[Bo]

Yeah.

[Colin]

Feels incomplete.

[Bo]

Feels incomplete.

[Colin]

Like what, Blind? Third Eye would make more sense.

[Bo]

Totally. And I understand, like.

[Colin]

But I guess I'm saying, like. Yeah. I don't know. I must be Third Eye Blind.

[Bo]

Yeah, right. Exactly. And it's like, okay. But I don't know, I just. I. I Ever since I was a kid, ever since Semi Charm Life came on and they said like, ah, that's the new one from Third Eyeball. It just bothered me.

[Colin]

I think that's like quintessential 90s name of just like, I don't know, cream.

[Bo]

Of some young guy. Yeah, Yeah. I hate it.

[Colin]

It sounds crazy, I guess.

[Bo]

Dude, Crucial Taunt.

[Colin]

Kind of a sick, sick ass, fake ass name, you know?

[Bo]

Yeah.

[Colin]

Yeah. They did good with that one. One of the. I've got more worse than best here. So maybe I'll fire off a couple.

[Bo]

Yeah.

[Colin]

Live. Because is it live or is it live?

[Bo]

I don't know.

[Colin]

So. So written down.

[Bo]

Yeah.

[Colin]

It's. It's worthless and most people are going to read it rather than hear it. Of course.

[Bo]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Colin]

Absolutely. Horrible. Unsearchable. You can't search Live band.

[Bo]

Wow.

[Colin]

There's millions of those. You know.

[Bo]

Yeah. Wow.

[Colin]

The band live impossible. It's an SEO Nightmare. Which they never had to think about.

[Bo]

They didn't worry until. Yeah. Yeah, yeah.

[Colin]

And now it's just out of control.

[Bo]

SEO.

[Colin]

So now you just go. What was the placenta falls to the floor band? You go. I think it's. I think they're called live.

[Bo]

Dude. SEO. SEO Nightmare is pretty good.

[Colin]

SEO Nightmare is pretty good. There's going to be a Japanese band called SEO Nightmare any minute now. And then. Did I best. And this is the name that just sums them up so perfectly. Earth Crisis.

[Bo]

Interesting. I was wondering how you felt about it.

[Colin]

I love this thing. Dude. It only vegan straight Edge band being.

[Bo]

Called Earth Crisis and that's the only reason it works. 100 if it was like not a vegan or edge band and not as serious as they were and like, you know, as dedicated as they were.

[Colin]

No. They. That made it perfect. They're. They're. They're main. They're like most iconic shirt being just the recycling symbol.

[Bo]

How do you make that cool? How do you get that they did it.

[Colin]

Dude.

[Bo]

It's crazy.

[Colin]

It's crazy. Alternatively, another great band name just to coincide with this is Floor Punch.

[Bo]

Dude. It's a great bad name.

[Colin]

And Path of Resistance.

[Bo]

Path of Resistance is incredible. You know what else fucking rocks that fits in with Earth Crisis is All Out War.

[Colin]

Yeah. God damn right. That may. There may be no band in history whose music is summed up by their name more than all at War. We're just right. This is like guys naming ath. Naming quarterbacks. He was good. All At War. Oh great.

[Bo]

Great name. I had Megadeth on here. I really don't like. Like mate like in. In the same vein as Metallica or Motley Crue and Megadeth. Aerosmith.

[Colin]

Sure.

[Bo]

Get. Get out of here.

[Colin]

No, I'm with you.

[Bo]

100 but then, you know what's funny is I think if a band existed today like. Like a current. Like a hardcore band and they just like made up a word that sounded cool and looked cool on a flyer, I might be into it. So no, there's there?

[Colin]

Dude, there's tons of those. Yeah, like Taylor calling his solo thing Zeus. But spelling it wrong.

[Bo]

But spelling it wrong. Yeah, good point.

[Colin]

Sick ass name.

[Bo]

That's good.

[Colin]

I've only got one best left.

[Bo]

Perfect.

[Colin]

And a bunch of worst. So I'll just fire off some worst. Okay.

[Bo]

Yes.

[Colin]

And I'll save some for last. Anything named. Any geographical names.

[Bo]

Asia, Europe, Kansas, Boston.

[Colin]

Into the bin with you, Chicago. All great. All bangers. Chicago. Horrible.

[Bo]

Come on, Terrible.

[Colin]

We've got to do better. Yeah, let's get in this time machine and fix this.

[Bo]

Yeah, I fully agree.

[Colin]

Absolutely. Horrible. Dead mouse with the 5. Yeah, I've been saying dead mal 5 for years.

[Bo]

Not a gamer.

[Colin]

No, that was wrong.

[Bo]

Not a gamer.

[Colin]

Horrible dying fetus. One of the worst ever.

[Bo]

Really? That surprises me. Horrible to hear you say that. I'm surprised, actually.

[Colin]

I mean it's. I mean it's offensive and cool and does. It's iconic now, but it was really hard to wear a dying fetus shirt.

[Bo]

It doesn't pass. It passes the vision.

[Colin]

Really hard to explain that to teachers. Yeah, they're really good.

[Bo]

I swear to God.

[Colin]

I promise.

[Bo]

Yeah, that's a good one.

[Colin]

And Butthole Surfers.

[Bo]

Oh, my God.

[Colin]

They know what they were.

[Bo]

They know exactly what they were and.

[Colin]

They did it wrong. Go to hell, Butthole surfer.

[Bo]

Yeah, that's bad.

[Colin]

You will be surfing the flames of hell for the rest of your life with your butthole getting scorched. Okay.

[Bo]

The terrible bad name.

[Colin]

I only have one left for both, so I'll wait. I'll save them.

[Bo]

Okay. You said ghost earlier and that was on here. Oh, here's one. Neurosis. I think Neurosis looks cool. I think their logo is incredible.

[Colin]

Yeah.

[Bo]

I don't know what Neurosis is. And that's cool.

[Colin]

I don't. I mean, yeah, I don't know the textbook definition, but to me it means droney, experimental, groundbreaking band.

[Bo]

That's. That's what I surmise.

[Colin]

Yeah.

[Bo]

Yeah, I think that's it for me. That's my whole list.

[Colin]

That's all. You're done. Okay. So my last best ever.

[Bo]

Yeah.

[Colin]

Is another. As much like Smash Mouth. This, I think could have and should have been the hardest band in the world. I think they've got to give it up and just give it to somebody else now. If they want to give it to me, I'll start something new. That's great. One of the hardest, most aggressive, most violent names in history. Jawbreaker.

[Bo]

Crazy name.

[Colin]

Hard name.

[Bo]

Hard. Hard name.

[Colin]

Doesn't make any Sense for them. So, guys, I'll take it from you. I'll give you 100 bucks. Final offer.

[Bo]

Is it based off the candy? Like, what?

[Colin]

It has to be.

[Bo]

You think so?

[Colin]

The name is candy. The logo is salt. Make up your mind. Those are conflicting tastes, ok? Those are conflicting flavor palates. Give one to me. We'll get. We'll break. We'll really start breaking some jobs. All right. And my last pick for worst man name, Weekend Nachos.

[Bo]

Yeah, I almost said it earlier. That's. They absolutely just did that.

[Colin]

They know. And it was a gag. It was like, okay, we're gonna. It's gonna sound Japanese. It's two words that don't mean anything.

[Bo]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Colin]

They picked the wrong two words that don't mean anything together. And now people are gonna be saying weekday not just to them, for the rest of lives. I'm sure they regret this every waking minute of their lives.

[Bo]

I. I often wonder.

[Colin]

Yeah, but it worked out.

[Bo]

But it worked. Yeah, it got over.

[Colin]

And that's. That's the thing, is a bad band name can help you a lot of the time.

[Bo]

Absolutely.

[Colin]

If it's that bad, somebody's like, well, I gotta hear this shit. And then if the music is awesome, like Weekend Nachos or Ass Suck or Alison Chains, Goo Goo Dolls or fucking Goo Goo Dolls is right. Thank you all so much for joining us today. That was the best and worst band names of all time. I'm sure we missed a billion because there's a billion great names. There's 2 billion bad names. So let us know below your favorite and least favorite band names of all time.

[Bo]

Very good. I love that.

[Colin]

The winner will get the name Jawbreaker. You get to call your man Jawbreaker. We sign and Smash Round. You get to pick both. So make your the right picks and we will see you next week. Bye.