Listener's Playhouse 40-06-29 (01) The Twenty First Girl

Summary

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Listener’s Playhouse: “The Twenty-First Girl” (June 29, 1940)

Episode Overview

This episode of Harold’s Old Time Radio presents “The Twenty-First Girl,” an original radio play from the Listener’s Playhouse series, first aired on June 29, 1940. Set in the whimsical world of American folklore, the story follows the legendary lumberjack Paul Bunyan as he seeks companionship, only to find himself entangled in comically escalating matrimonial and existential predicaments. Through humor and heartfelt reflections, the play explores themes of loneliness, love, legendary status, and the importance of legends for a nation’s spirit.

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Key Discussion Points and Story Beats

Introduction & Setting the Scene

• [00:53–01:36] The NBC announcer introduces Listener's Playhouse and the unique style of the evening's play, highlighting special musical motifs for each character and scene, particularly Paul Bunyan and Johnny Inkslinger.
• [01:33–02:39] The main characters introduce themselves via signature musical cues:
  • Johnny Inkslinger: The trusty sidekick.
  • Paul Bunyan: The legendary larger-than-life lumberjack.
  • The 21st Girl: Central to the story’s twist.

Paul Bunyan’s Trouble

• [03:21–05:19] A telegram brings news of Paul Bunyan's destructive walk along Lake Superior. The Sheriff tasks Johnny Inkslinger to find and calm Bunyan before he destroys more of the wilderness.
  • Quote (Johnny Inkslinger, 04:45):

    "Taller than the tallest tree. That's Paul Bunyan. Than a hundred men he pulls up trees by the root, drinks a river dry in the Gulf, eats 20 cows for lunch and makes an omelette from a thousand eggs. That's Paul Bunyan, the greatest lumberjack that ever lived. And now he's mad at something."

• [05:19–06:34] Johnny finds Paul Bunyan in tears, revealing a rare moment of emotional vulnerability.
  • Quote (Paul Bunyan, 05:19):

    "Oh, doggone bind. Old tree. Oh, that's no fun. I'm unhappy. I feel like I'm going to cry."

Crisis of the Legend

• [06:34–07:56] Johnny warns Paul about the consequences of his legendary status:
  • If legends misbehave, people stop believing in them—and they disappear from memory.
  • Quote (Johnny Inkslinger, 07:03):

    "Mind you, you're about the best legend that America has... America ought to have more legends like you. Legends of strength and great for the people to believe in. Legends of beauty and glory. I tell you, Mr. Bunyan, you're a mighty wonderful legend."

Bunyan’s Loneliness and Quest for Love

• [08:34–09:41] Paul admits his loneliness and yearning for love:
  • Quote (Paul Bunyan, 09:02):

    "Yes, I'm... I'm in love. I'm a man, Johnny. I may be a legend, but I'm still a man. And I'm in love."

• Paul compares himself to a solitary tree—strong, but vulnerable and alone.

The Search for a Wife

• [10:49–14:06] Johnny suggests Paul should get married to end his loneliness—leading to an open call for suitors.
• [11:25–12:36] Women from all over the country arrive hoping to marry Paul; comedic chaos ensues as their ambitions and talents are proclaimed.
  • Memorable moment (Sheriff, 12:08):

    "My wife wants to marry Paul Bunyan. I tell you, Mr. Bunyan, this is the greatest thing that ever happened for the state of Wisconsin."

• [13:18–13:53] Paul meets the hopeful brides, each allowed one sentence to impress him, highlighting his comedic indecision and the spectacle of mass matchmaking.

Comedic Selection and the “Bigamist” Dilemma

• [15:17–17:56] Paul finds himself smitten with more than one candidate—amused by each woman’s unique skill or trait.
  • Quote (Paul Bunyan, 17:10):

    "I'm in love with all those women."

  • Quote (Johnny Inkslinger, 17:16):

    "It isn't right Mr. Bunyan, something must be wrong with you."

• [18:18–19:10] Paul, unable to decide, declares he will marry them all, leading to the absurd legal and social consequences.
  • Quote (Paul Bunyan, 18:34):

    "I'm going to marry them all."

• [19:07–19:17] Word spreads—Paul Bunyan intends to marry at least 20 girls. Debate breaks out over whether this is “bigotry” or “bigamy.”
  • Memorable moment (Sheriff & Johnny Inkslinger, 19:07–19:10):

    Sheriff: "We can't marry them all. That's bigotry."
    Johnny: "You mean bigamy. Marrying two women is bigamy. Marrying 20 is bigotry."

The Courtroom Farce and Legal Resolution

• [19:24–21:17] In a tongue-in-cheek trial, various witnesses affirm Paul's legendary status: as strong as 20 men, eats like 20, drinks like 20.
  • Quote Montage (19:36–21:17):
    • "Why, he's as strong as 20 men!"
    • "If I know Paul Bunyan drink, he drinks enough for 20 men."
    • "On the basis of expert evidence... the court hereby directs the city clerk... to issue a marriage license to Paul Bunyan and 20 females."
• [22:04–23:57] Paul is flooded with gifts and congratulatory offers for his impending mass wedding. He reflects on his legacy and America's need for legends, drawing a contrast between American and European myths.
  • Quote (Paul Bunyan, 22:19):

    "You have no idea how much faith the American people put in their legends... because the American people like to believe in something simple like being honest."

The Final Twist: The 21st Girl

• [24:00–25:27] Chaos resumes as officials realize Paul has promised to marry 21 women, not 20—jeopardizing his license and leading to further legal and social bewilderment.
• [26:28–28:52] The mysterious “21st Girl” visits Paul:
  • She explains that none of the girls want to be excluded or cause hurt; they release Paul from his obligations, uniting in letting the legend return to belong to every American, rather than just a select few.
  • Quote (The 21st Girl, 28:19):

    "You're a legend, Paul. And we need you as a legend to belong to all of us. And you mustn't ever try to belong to just a few of us alone. You must always belong to all of us."

• Paul gratefully accepts, vowing to remain the nation’s beloved legend.

Resolution & Moral

• [28:54–29:15] A collective pledge is made: Paul will remain a legend for all, and in this way, will never be lonely.
• [29:05] Paul Bunyan:

  "Never. I'll always be your greatest and best legend. A legend of strength and power for America."

• The 21st Girl bids him an affectionate goodbye on behalf of all (and all Americans).

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Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• Paul Bunyan’s Emotional Confession:
  "Yes, Johnny, I... I’ve been crying. Now don’t you say a word to anybody about it. But that was me crying." — Paul Bunyan [06:02]
• On Being a Legend:
  "Mind you, you’re about the best legend that America has... America ought to have more legends like you." — Johnny Inkslinger [07:03]
• The Court Decides:
  "It is the opinion of this court that Paul Bunyan is 20 men. Therefore, this court hereby directs the city clerk... to issue a marriage license to Paul Bunyan and 20 females." — Judge [21:26]
• Bigotry vs Bigamy:
  "Marrying two women is bigamy. Marrying 20 is bigotry." — Johnny Inkslinger [19:10]
• The Moral of Legends:
  "People take that legend out and believe in it every time they get paid in low. Because that just means that everybody in this country can be famous and great just by working himself and teaching himself and then taking... Take me, by golly, the legend of Paul Bunyan. Just a lumberjack, but a legend of strength." — Paul Bunyan [22:35]
• Belonging to All:
  "You’re a legend, Paul. And we need you as a legend to belong to all of us. And you mustn’t ever try to belong to just a few of us alone. You must always belong to all of us." — The 21st Girl [28:19]

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Important Timestamps

• [00:53–01:36]: Show and episode introduction
• [03:21–05:47]: Paul’s troubles begin
• [06:34–07:56]: Warning about the fate of forgotten legends
• [09:02–09:41]: Paul Bunyan’s loneliness
• [11:25–12:36]: Suitors arrive in droves
• [13:18–13:53]: Brides try to impress Paul
• [18:34–19:10]: Paul’s declaration to marry 20
• [19:24–21:17]: The courtroom scene
• [22:04–23:57]: Reflections on legend and American values
• [24:00–26:02]: The legal mix-up: 20 vs 21 brides
• [26:28–28:52]: The 21st Girl resolves the story

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Conclusion

“The Twenty-First Girl” is a witty, thoughtful, and ultimately heartwarming exploration of American folklore, community, and belonging. Through Paul Bunyan’s outsized predicament, the play gently lampoons social institutions—court, marriage, even advertising—while affirming the power of collective belief in great stories. The twist ending, with Paul reclaimed for all rather than any one, upholds the central place of legends in the nation’s imaginative life.

Listeners interested in American folklore, radio drama, or tales about the importance of shared myths and community will find this episode both charming and meaningful.

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Transcript

[Narrator/Announcer]

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The Listeners Playhouse, a new feature of the National Broadcasting Company. Each Saturday night we will bring you a play written by one of three talented young writers. John Latouche, Ronald McDougall and Albert N. Williams. They will be supplemented from time to time by other young writers keenly desirous of making the fullest possible use of the radio medium in expressing ideas or telling stories in dramatic form. In these plays, you will hear specially composed music by Tom Bennett. The Listeners Playhouse.

[Johnny Inkslinger]

List. When you hear that music that's me Johnny and Slinger.

[Female Suitor/Various Women]

Listen when you hear that music that's us Paul Bunyan. Sweeney, sweetheart. Listen.

[The 21st Girl]

When you hear that music that means I'm the 21st girl that Paul Bunyan wanted to marry.

[Paul Bunyan]

Listen. When you hear that music that's me Paul Bunyan.

[Narrator/Announcer]

Saturday night, June 29, 1940, and the listeners Playhouse of the National Broadcasting Company takes the air. The first presentation by Albert N. Williams, the 21st Girl Special music composed by Tom Bennett. Listen for the identifying musical scenes which distinguish the important dramatic elements throughout the play. The Johnny Inkslanger scene and the Paul Bunyan scene. They will be distorted to represent particular emotions. But their basic tonal color will remain unchanged throughout the play.

[The 21st Girl]

Who is it?

[Johnny Inkslinger]

What is it? Who is it? What's all the racket about? Who are you?

[Paul Bunyan]

What do you want?

[Sheriff/Mayor/Other Male Characters]

Johnny, A singer?

[Johnny Inkslinger]

Yes, that's me. What do you want?

[Paul Bunyan]

Come on down.

[Sheriff/Mayor/Other Male Characters]

It's the sheriff.

[Johnny Inkslinger]

Go on away and don't. The sheriff. Oh, my goodness. Yes, Mr. Sheriff. I'll be right down.

[The 21st Girl]

Good heavens.

[Johnny Inkslinger]

What is it?

[Paul Bunyan]

Look here.

[Sheriff/Mayor/Other Male Characters]

A telegram from the game warden up by Lake Superior.

[Johnny Inkslinger]

A telegram for me?

[Sheriff/Mayor/Other Male Characters]

Not for you, for me.

[Johnny Inkslinger]

Here, read it. Telegram. Oh, my. Terrible devastation all along Lake Shore. Trees uprooted for miles. Boulders being thrown into lakes. Suspect Paul Bunyan. Get hold of Johnny Inkslinger at once. Well? Oh, that's Mr. Bunyan, all right. He was feeling moody and restless last night and said he was going to take a walk along the shore of Lake Superior. That's Mr. Bunyan, all right.

[Female Suitor/Various Women]

Gracious.

[Johnny Inkslinger]

What shall we do?

[Sheriff/Mayor/Other Male Characters]

What shall we do? We can't lock him up. He's too big. You're the only man who can handle Paul Bunyan. He'll do anything you tell him to.

[Johnny Inkslinger]

Yes, that's right. Throwing boulders in the lake. I guess I'd better stop him. Uprooting trees, breaking them in two. Oh, yes. I better get right up there at once.

[Sheriff/Mayor/Other Male Characters]

I say, you'd better find Paul Bunyan and stop him from ruining the scenery of this beautiful state. Bring him back home and make him quiet down.

[Johnny Inkslinger]

Yes, sir.

[Sheriff/Mayor/Other Male Characters]

And hurry before he ruins the whole shore of Lake Superior.

[Female Suitor/Various Women]

Yes, sir.

[Sheriff/Mayor/Other Male Characters]

I've got a horse for you.

[Johnny Inkslinger]

Now go in my nightgown.

[Sheriff/Mayor/Other Male Characters]

In your nightgown.

[Johnny Inkslinger]

Taller than the tallest tree. That's Paul Bunyan. Than a hundred men he pulls up trees by the roof, Drinks a river dry in the Gulf. Eats 20 cows for lunch and makes an omelette from a thousand eggs. That's Paul Bunyan, the greatest lumberjack that ever lived. And now he's mad at something. Oh, my Paul Bunyan.

[Female Suitor/Various Women]

Mad.

[Johnny Inkslinger]

Oh, I must hurry.

[Female Suitor/Various Women]

Get up. Get up.

[Paul Bunyan]

Oh, doggone don't. Tree. Oh, that's no fun. I'm unhappy. I feel like I'm going to cry.

[Johnny Inkslinger]

Mr. Bunyan. Mr. Bunyan. Oh, Mr. Bunyan, here I am. Down here. Look by your lamp.

[Female Suitor/Various Women]

Float.

[Paul Bunyan]

What's that? Oh, Johnny. Inkling.

[Johnny Inkslinger]

Mr. Bunyan, lift me up. I want to talk to you. Here I am.

[Female Suitor/Various Women]

That's right.

[Johnny Inkslinger]

A little higher, please. There. Good heavens, Mr. Bunyan, that was a terrible storm. Oh, you've been crying.

[Paul Bunyan]

Yes, Johnny, I. I've been crying. Now, don't you say a word to anybody about it. But that was me crying.

[Johnny Inkslinger]

Well, whatever on earth is the matter, Mr. Bunyan?

[Paul Bunyan]

Johnny, I'm so unhappy.

[Johnny Inkslinger]

But all these trees. Upon my word, there isn't a tree standing for 20 miles.

[Paul Bunyan]

I know. I'm kind of ashamed of that. I tore them up and broke them.

[Johnny Inkslinger]

Oh, Mr. Bunyan, why did you do that? You've never broken things before. You've never hurt anything or done anything bad. You mustn't start now.

[Paul Bunyan]

I know, I know. I just wanted to, that's all.

[Johnny Inkslinger]

But, Mr. Bunyan, if you do that. Well, we'll just get rid of you, that's all.

[Paul Bunyan]

Get rid of me?

[Johnny Inkslinger]

Oh, I mean that. Mr. Bunyan, I hate to have to tell you, but if you ever do this again, if you ever break anything or go on a rampage again, the people just won't believe in you.

[Paul Bunyan]

Believe in me? What do you mean?

[Johnny Inkslinger]

You know as well as I do that you're just a legend, Mr. Bunyan. Just a legend.

[Paul Bunyan]

Just a legend.

[Johnny Inkslinger]

Just a legend. Mind you, you're about the best legend that America has. Think of it. The legend of Paul Bunyan. The strongest, the greatest, the biggest man in the world. Taller than the tallest tree, stronger than a hundred men. Oh, my, it's a fine legend. It's a fine legend. A wonderful legend. America ought to have more legends like you. Legends of strength and greatness for the people to believe in. Legends of beauty and glory. I tell you, Mr. Bunyan, you're a mighty wonderful legend.

[Paul Bunyan]

Thank you, Johnny.

[Johnny Inkslinger]

That's why you've got to be careful.

[Paul Bunyan]

Oh, yes.

[Johnny Inkslinger]

Because if you ever act up this way again, the people will just erase you from their memories. You've heard of that, haven't you? Legends being erased from people's memories?

[Paul Bunyan]

Yes.

[Johnny Inkslinger]

That's what will happen to you. People will get rid of you, quit believing in you. They'll erase you from their memories.

[Paul Bunyan]

Oh, no. No, they can't. They won't.

[Johnny Inkslinger]

I tell you they will. They will if you don't behave.

[Paul Bunyan]

Oh, I'll behave. I'll behave. You tell them that, Johnny. You tell them that I'll behave. They know that I'll do anything you ask. I will. You know I will. Why, you're my friend, Johnny Inkslinger. My best friend. You tell them, Johnny, and they'll believe you.

[Johnny Inkslinger]

Well, all right, I will. I'll tell them that you'll behave, and I will, too.

[Paul Bunyan]

I promise you that I will. Honest, Johnny, I will. They've got to believe in me. They've got to.

[Johnny Inkslinger]

Oh, they will, Mr. Bunyan, they will.

[Paul Bunyan]

You. You had me worried for a while there.

[Johnny Inkslinger]

Tell me, Mr. Bunyan, what was the trouble?

[Paul Bunyan]

Trouble?

[Johnny Inkslinger]

Trouble.

[Paul Bunyan]

Oh. Oh, I'm unhappy, Johnny. Unhappy. So unhappy I could take those trees.

[Johnny Inkslinger]

And now, Mr. Bunyan.

[Paul Bunyan]

I forgot. But I'm still unhappy, Johnny. I'm in love.

[Johnny Inkslinger]

In love? Why, Mr. Bunyan.

[Paul Bunyan]

Yes, I'm in love. I'm a man, Johnny. I may be a legend, but I'm still a man. And I'm in love. Listen to my heart. Hear it beat. It's lonely. Look into my eyes. What do you see? Searching. Seeking. Looking for someone to love. I'm lonely, Johnny. Lonely and in love.

[Sheriff/Mayor/Other Male Characters]

In love?

[Paul Bunyan]

With whom? Just in love. I want to get married. It isn't right for a man not to get married. We're like trees, Johnny. Trees of the forest. We need others near us. Did you ever see a lone tree on a flat prairie? It's a pitiful sight. And the first high wind blows it down. That's what I am, a lone tree.

[Sheriff/Mayor/Other Male Characters]

Oh, Mr. Bunyan, have you ever seen.

[Paul Bunyan]

A lone blade of grass? No. Grass grows with other grass. And leaves grow together. And the birds of the air nest in the same branches together. The raindrops fall from heaven together. Johnny. The sun shines in many beams, not just one. And the snow melts in little streams which join together. Johnny. Everything in the world finds something to join with. To be with. Except me. Except me. Do you realize it?

[The 21st Girl]

Why, yes.

[Paul Bunyan]

Of all things in nature, on the earth or over earth, everything finds a mate. Except me. Except Paul Bunyan.

[Johnny Inkslinger]

Yeah, yeah. Come to think of it, you must be lonely.

[Paul Bunyan]

I am lonely, Johnny. I'm probably the most lonely thing on the face of the earth. Johnny, I. I think I'm going to cry.

[Johnny Inkslinger]

Oh, Mr. Bunyan, you mustn't. You must control yourself.

[Female Suitor/Various Women]

You mustn't.

[Johnny Inkslinger]

Mr. Bunyan. Oh, Mr. Bunyan. Mr. Bunyan, listen to me. You can get married. You don't need to be lonely. You can get married.

[Paul Bunyan]

What's that?

[Johnny Inkslinger]

I said you don't need to be lonely. You can get married.

[Paul Bunyan]

I can?

[Female Suitor/Various Women]

Yes.

[Johnny Inkslinger]

I'll take care of the whole thing. I'll find the girl. I'll hire the minister. I'll fix it. You can get married and you'll be happy. But just stop crying.

[Paul Bunyan]

I can get married. I can get married.

[Female Suitor/Various Women]

What's that sign say? Wanted a girl to marry Paul Bunyan. Good heavens. Hey, mister, where do you apply? Get married to Paul Bunyan. Hey, that's an idea. Where do you apply? Let me in. I'll marry Paul Bunyan. I want to see Mr. Paul Bunyan. I'll marry him. Quick. Sell me that dress. I want to make an impression on Paul Bunyan. He wants to get married. How much is that glass eye?

[Johnny Inkslinger]

I've got to have it.

[Female Suitor/Various Women]

I want to make a good impression on Paul Bunyan. Can you teach me how to cook by tomorrow night? I want to marry Paul Bunyan. But tell me, that wig.

[Sheriff/Mayor/Other Male Characters]

Where is this Paul Bunyan? My daughter wants to get married to him.

[Female Suitor/Various Women]

My sister wants to get married to Paul Bunyan.

[Sheriff/Mayor/Other Male Characters]

My wife wants to marry Paul Bunyan. I tell you, Mr. Bunyan, this is the greatest thing that ever happened for the state of Wisconsin. Why, girls and women from all over the country have come here hoping to be chosen to be Paul Bunyan's bride.

[Paul Bunyan]

All these neckties on straight. Yes, yes, yes.

[Sheriff/Mayor/Other Male Characters]

And so I rented the town hall. And everybody that wants to marry you is down there. They're all lined up like a convention. The redheads are all in one corner of the room, the blondes in the gallery and the brunettes on the platform. It's all set, Mr. Bunyan. All you've got to do is pick out which one one you want.

[Paul Bunyan]

Johnny, hand me another bucket of that grease. My hair won't stay in place there. All right, men, let's go.

[Female Suitor/Various Women]

Quiet. What's the matter? Look, coming around the corner. Why, it's full. Bunyan, get my wig on straight. Run the call I, Dearie, that dress of yours does always look beautiful. Hand me McCain, please. You're something of my game light, girly. If you mention my glass, I'll snatch you a ball. Lady.

[Sheriff/Mayor/Other Male Characters]

Ladies. Ladies, Ladies. Your attention, please. For the benefit of those of you who haven't met our most distinguished citizen.

[Paul Bunyan]

Oh, Bunyan.

[Female Suitor/Various Women]

Paul Bunyan. Hello, you. Hello, Paul, dear.

[Sheriff/Mayor/Other Male Characters]

Ladies, ladies, ladies, please. Now, all of you, stand where you are. Mr. Bunyan will pass among you and make his choice. You will each be allowed one sentence. Quiet now, ladies. Oh, Bunyan, Absolute quiet for once in your lives.

[Paul Bunyan]

Don't mind me, ladies. I. I'm just looking for. Just looking for someone. Is that all right, Johnny?

[Johnny Inkslinger]

Hold me higher. There, that's fine. Now just start walking.

[Female Suitor/Various Women]

My friends all tell me I'm very beautiful.

[Paul Bunyan]

Nope.

[The 21st Girl]

I could cook. I used to cook for the railroad men. I can cook for you.

[Johnny Inkslinger]

Don't throw her out, you fool. Set her aside. Fried eggs ain't hay.

[Paul Bunyan]

All right, you stand over there.

[Female Suitor/Various Women]

I can. So you wear out lots of clothes.

[Paul Bunyan]

No.

[Female Suitor/Various Women]

Lots of clothes. You're a big man, Paul Bunyan. You'll need lots of sewing.

[Johnny Inkslinger]

Give her a whirl, Mr. Bunyan.

[Paul Bunyan]

Give her a whirl.

[Johnny Inkslinger]

You never can tell.

[Paul Bunyan]

All right, you stand over there too.

[Female Suitor/Various Women]

But I'm over here.

[Sheriff/Mayor/Other Male Characters]

Ladies, ladies, please. Mr. Bunyan has to make a choice. He'll make several choices in the preliminaries and make his final choice later.

[Paul Bunyan]

Don't rush him.

[Sheriff/Mayor/Other Male Characters]

Don't rush him.

[Female Suitor/Various Women]

Don't rush Paul Bunyan.

[Paul Bunyan]

You know, Johnny, this is fun. I never realized falling in love would be such fun. Picking out the girls I might marry. Well, I can't stand here all night.

[Health Plan Announcer]

What do you think makes the perfect snack?

[Johnny Inkslinger]

Hmm.

[Narrator/Announcer]

It's gotta be when I'm really craving it and it's convenient.

[Health Plan Announcer]

Could you be more specific?

[Johnny Inkslinger]

When it's cravinient.

[Female Suitor/Various Women]

Okay.

[Johnny Inkslinger]

Like a freshly baked cookie made with.

[Narrator/Announcer]

Real butter, available right down the street at a.m. p.m. Or a savory breakfast.

[Johnny Inkslinger]

Sandwich I can grab in Just a second.

[Health Plan Announcer]

At am pm. I'm seeing a pattern here.

[Narrator/Announcer]

Well, yeah, we're talking about what I.

[Health Plan Announcer]

Crave, which is anything from am, pm.

[Paul Bunyan]

What more could you want?

[Narrator/Announcer]

Stop by AMPM where the snacks and drinks are perfectly craveable and convenient. That's cravenience. Am, pm Too much good stuff.

[Health Plan Announcer]

Today we're going to talk about deep breathing. Something we all need to do more of. Especially when you're getting ready to call your health plan and deal with one of those automated phone trees. You know how it feels to get into an endless phone loop when you just have a simple question that could take two minutes or less and then pretty soon you've lost your Zen. Shouldn't your health plan help you reduce stress? That's why you'll talk to a real person when you choose Pacific Source Health Plans. Tranquil.

[Paul Bunyan]

Tranquility. Are you.

[Female Suitor/Various Women]

I can keep a house clean as a pine forest, Mr. Bunyan. I can bake punch. Mr. Bunyan.

[Johnny Inkslinger]

Set her aside.

[Female Suitor/Various Women]

I can sing cowboy bells. Mr. Bunyan.

[Johnny Inkslinger]

Toss her out.

[Female Suitor/Various Women]

I can whistle like a lumber train.

[Johnny Inkslinger]

Anything for a laugh, Mr. Bunyan.

[Female Suitor/Various Women]

I can wiggle my ears. I can milk 12 cows a day.

[Sheriff/Mayor/Other Male Characters]

Well, Mr. Bunyan, I must say that was a pretty strenuous bit of work considering all those girls.

[Paul Bunyan]

Oh my, my.

[Sheriff/Mayor/Other Male Characters]

What wouldn't a man of my propensities give to you? Understand, Mr. Bunyan.

[Johnny Inkslinger]

Of course he understands. Mr. Mayor. Please don't bother Mr. Bunyan now. He's still got his final charge to me.

[Sheriff/Mayor/Other Male Characters]

Oh yes, of course, of course. Ladies, ladies. Quietly now. Mr. Bunyan has narrowed his choice down to those of you standing in the corner. Mr. Bunyan still has his final choice to make. It may be any one of you. Anyone. All right, Mr. Bunyan, you may continue.

[Paul Bunyan]

Let's see, we got a red hearted one now. Now that second one can cook pancakes. He isn't that other one. Johnny.

[Johnny Inkslinger]

Yes, what is it, Mr. Bunny?

[Narrator/Announcer]

Johnny.

[Paul Bunyan]

Do most men fall in love with lots of girls?

[Johnny Inkslinger]

Why yes, I guess they do.

[Paul Bunyan]

Yeah, I thought so. I'm in love with all those women.

[Johnny Inkslinger]

Nonsense.

[Paul Bunyan]

It is nonsense. How many girls are there?

[Johnny Inkslinger]

Oh, I. I don't know. I didn't count them. Must be 20.

[Paul Bunyan]

Anyway, you know, I don't understand understand too much about this love business. But I think it's quite logical being in love with more than one woman.

[Johnny Inkslinger]

It isn't right. Mr. Bunyan. Something must be wrong with you.

[Paul Bunyan]

Not at all, not at all. Look there. I love that redhead because I love red hair.

[Johnny Inkslinger]

Well, I can understand that. She's very attractive.

[Paul Bunyan]

But I also love flapjacks. And that one next to her can cook the best flapjacks in Wisconsin. Not one in the back. He can play the mandolin. Johnny, I love the sound of a mandolin.

[Johnny Inkslinger]

Oh, Mr. Bunyan, you're being difficult. Why don't you decide what you like best and make up your mind?

[Sheriff/Mayor/Other Male Characters]

We're waiting, Mr. Bunyan. Yes.

[Female Suitor/Various Women]

Hurry up.

[Johnny Inkslinger]

It's getting late. We've got lots to do yet. Get a license and things like that, you know.

[Paul Bunyan]

Johnny, I've got it.

[Johnny Inkslinger]

You've made up your mind?

[Paul Bunyan]

Yep, I made up my mind. Good, good. Ladies, ladies.

[Sheriff/Mayor/Other Male Characters]

All right. Mr. Bunyan has decided and will make his Choice now.

[Female Suitor/Various Women]

Oh, Mr. Bunyan.

[Sheriff/Mayor/Other Male Characters]

Well, let us in on the secret. Which is the lucky girl, Mr. Bunyan?

[Johnny Inkslinger]

Go on. Don't be frightened.

[Female Suitor/Various Women]

Which is it?

[Sheriff/Mayor/Other Male Characters]

All right now, girls.

[Paul Bunyan]

I'm going to marry them all.

[Female Suitor/Various Women]

All of us. He's going to marry us all.

[Johnny Inkslinger]

Paul Bunyan made up his mind.

[Paul Bunyan]

He's going to marry old 20.

[Sheriff/Mayor/Other Male Characters]

Paul Bunyan, legendary giant lumberjack, today announced his intention to MARRY at least 20 girls.

[Johnny Inkslinger]

We can't marry them all. That's bigotry.

[Sheriff/Mayor/Other Male Characters]

You mean bigamy?

[Johnny Inkslinger]

Marrying two women is bigamy. Marrying 20 is bigotry.

[Sheriff/Mayor/Other Male Characters]

Bunyan, legendary Wisconsin lumberjack, threatens to fight clear to Supreme Court for right to marry as many girls as he wants to.

[Female Suitor/Various Women]

Hello, Father Whitman at Mind and Door, Attorneys at Law. Good morning.

[Johnny Inkslinger]

I want to speak to Mr. Doakes, please.

[Female Suitor/Various Women]

Just a moment. Yes, I'll call for you, Mr. Doak. I'll go ahead for you.

[Johnny Inkslinger]

Hello, Mr. Doakes? Yeah. Will you handle the case of Paul Bunyan, please? He wants to marry a whole bunch of girls and we can't get him a license. Mr. Bunyan says he'll fight it out in the courts. And if it takes the rest of his life, he says spare no lawyers.

[Sheriff/Mayor/Other Male Characters]

Represent Paul Bunyan in court. You bet I will. $10, please. Your witness, Mr. Do. Thank you, counselor. Now, Mr. Smith, you say you have known the supplicant Paul Bunyan for many years. Worked with him 18 years. I only want you to answer one question, Mr. Smith. Is Bunyan a strong man?

[Johnny Inkslinger]

Why, you idiot, Ain't you ever seen him?

[Paul Bunyan]

The witness will kindly confine his remark. Oh, Bunyan strong.

[Sheriff/Mayor/Other Male Characters]

Why, he's as strong as 20 men. Thank you, Mr. Smith. Ladies and gentlemen of the jury, I want you to take careful note of that answer. As strong as 20 men.

[Female Suitor/Various Women]

Does Mr. Bunyan eat very much? I've cooked for that man for years.

[The 21st Girl]

Let me tell you, he Eats as.

[Female Suitor/Various Women]

Much as 20 man.

[Paul Bunyan]

If I know Paul Bunyan drinks. He drinks enough for 20 men.

[Johnny Inkslinger]

He can handle timber for 20 men.

[Sheriff/Mayor/Other Male Characters]

I say give me Paul Bunyan any day. He's better than 20 men.

[Female Suitor/Various Women]

And I thought he was in. He seems better than 20 men.

[Paul Bunyan]

Longer than 20.

[Female Suitor/Various Women]

He's not for 20.

[Paul Bunyan]

20 men.

[Johnny Inkslinger]

20 men.

[Narrator/Announcer]

20.

[Paul Bunyan]

20. On the basis of expert evidence given by qualified persons known to the supplicant. It is the opinion of this court that Paul Bunyan is 20 men. Therefore, this court hereby directs the city clerk in the town of Supplicant residence. To issue a marriage license to Paul Bunyan and 20 females.

[Johnny Inkslinger]

And here are 20 boxes of cigars.

[Sheriff/Mayor/Other Male Characters]

From a furniture store in Chicago.

[Paul Bunyan]

Johnny, you remember that day in the forest when I was so unhappy.

[Johnny Inkslinger]

And here's an invitation for you to visit a resort on Lake Michigan on your honeymoon. They say their convention manager will be happy to offer you special rates for the publicity they will receive.

[Paul Bunyan]

For years I have been just a legend. Just a legend. One of the great American legends. I admit I'm pretty proud of that. But after all, you must grant that I was pretty lonely.

[Johnny Inkslinger]

And here's an insurance company company offering you special group rates.

[Paul Bunyan]

We work pretty hard for this country. Have no idea how much faith the American people put in their legends. Why, there's George Washington. And that legend about the cherry trees. I bet that legend worked harder than any 10 myths these Europeans dig up. George was close to home. Not any myth about killing a dragon. Just a good old homespun legend about being honest. Why, that legend gets more play than half a dozen of them European myths. Because the American people like to believe in something simple like being honest. Take that one about honest aids. Scratching away with a chunk of charcoal on the back of a shovel. Why, I bet that legend has helped build America. More than all the gold in the ground and electricity in the air. People take that legend. I've been believing that everybody. Time they get paid a little old. Because that just means that everybody in this country can be famous and great. Just by working himself and teaching himself. And then take me, by golly, the legend of Paul Bunyan. Just a lumberjack, but a legend of strength. Men get thinking about me and they build cities. Men going into strange places. Building new homes and raising families in out of the way places. Just because they believe in me. Johnny, I. Johnny, what's that?

[Johnny Inkslinger]

More presents, I presume?

[The 21st Girl]

I'll see.

[Sheriff/Mayor/Other Male Characters]

Oh, the awfulest thing. The most terrible thing. I've never been so upset.

[Paul Bunyan]

The most awful Thing.

[Sheriff/Mayor/Other Male Characters]

Johnny Inklinger. How many girls did Mr. Bunyan choose?

[Johnny Inkslinger]

How many girls?

[Sheriff/Mayor/Other Male Characters]

You know, the ones he picked out the day of the contest. You know, the ones he's going to marry. The ones that have been living in the firehouse together. How many were there?

[Johnny Inkslinger]

Well, 20.

[Sheriff/Mayor/Other Male Characters]

Did you count them?

[Johnny Inkslinger]

Well, no, you said there were 20. You told me.

[Sheriff/Mayor/Other Male Characters]

You told me.

[Johnny Inkslinger]

Well, I said about 20 and you said about 20.

[Sheriff/Mayor/Other Male Characters]

I thought you had counted them. Johnny, there are 21.

[Johnny Inkslinger]

21?

[Sheriff/Mayor/Other Male Characters]

Yes. I thought you would count.

[Johnny Inkslinger]

I thought you would count.

[Sheriff/Mayor/Other Male Characters]

And we never did count. Paul Bunyan has promised to marry 21 girls. So what's one girl more or less to Paul Bunyan? His license says he can marry only 20.

[Johnny Inkslinger]

His license.

[Sheriff/Mayor/Other Male Characters]

And if he marries 21, he's a bigamist. If he throws one out, he'll be sued for breaking a treaty.

[Female Suitor/Various Women]

Treaty?

[Paul Bunyan]

Yes.

[Sheriff/Mayor/Other Male Characters]

I've had lawyers working all morning. An engagement to one girl is a promise. An engagement to marry 20, 21 is a treaty. If he throws any one of them out, he'll break his treaty.

[Johnny Inkslinger]

Break a treaty.

[Sheriff/Mayor/Other Male Characters]

You know what that means?

[Paul Bunyan]

Break a treaty. What'll I do?

[Sheriff/Mayor/Other Male Characters]

And I fought with the girls. I beg them, but they won't budge. None of them will drop off. They've announced their engagements. And every single One of the 21 says she's going to be married to him. No one will drop out. Oh, it isn't love. It's professional jealousy.

[Paul Bunyan]

Break a treaty. What will I do? What will I do? What will I do? Out into the forest where I can paint love with one girl too many. And the girls are jealous.

[Sheriff/Mayor/Other Male Characters]

Ah, that's a woman for you.

[Paul Bunyan]

That's 21 women.

[Sheriff/Mayor/Other Male Characters]

Why didn't Ink Sling account? Why did I get myself in this mess?

[Paul Bunyan]

Break a treaty. Why did I fall in love? Why do men get lonely? Why do men want to get married? I'm miserable. I don't want to get married. I want to be alone. I'm going to cry.

[Female Suitor/Various Women]

Mr. Bunyan. Paul Bunyan.

[Paul Bunyan]

Huh? Huh? Where is it?

[The 21st Girl]

Paul Bunyan, lift me up. I want to talk to you.

[Paul Bunyan]

Who are you?

[The 21st Girl]

Well, you might call me the 21st girl. I'm one of the girls you promised to marry you.

[Paul Bunyan]

You were the 21st girl. You caused all this.

[The 21st Girl]

No, Paul. You caused it by falling into love.

[Paul Bunyan]

Oh, love. Don't mention it.

[The 21st Girl]

Oh, but Paul, don't you love us anymore?

[Paul Bunyan]

No, no, I'm not in love with anybody. I don't want to be in love. I'm miserable. I am in so much trouble.

[Female Suitor/Various Women]

Oh, now don't cry. Don't cry.

[The 21st Girl]

Yeah, that's better. Well, if you don't get married, what will you do?

[Paul Bunyan]

Do? I work in the forest where I've always worked. I'll build roads and cut down trees and move mountains and clean out rivers and help men build towns and cities like I always did.

[The 21st Girl]

And you'll not be lonely?

[Paul Bunyan]

Never, Never again. I'll work so hard making people believe in me that I'll never be lonely again.

[The 21st Girl]

And you'll not fall in love again?

[Paul Bunyan]

Never, never. Once is enough for any man. So why do you ask me?

[Sheriff/Mayor/Other Male Characters]

What do you want?

[The 21st Girl]

I don't want anything. It's just this. None of us girls would let you.

[Paul Bunyan]

Go because professional jealousy.

[The 21st Girl]

Because we'd be jealous of the others. But all of us will let you go.

[Paul Bunyan]

All of you.

[The 21st Girl]

Yes. I talked to the other 20 girls. A mistake has been made. And it wasn't your fault.

[Paul Bunyan]

I thought I was in love.

[The 21st Girl]

You thought. But we figured that you weren't really in love with us.

[Paul Bunyan]

I don't love anybody.

[Female Suitor/Various Women]

Well, here's a statement from.

[The 21st Girl]

From us all, releasing you from your treatise.

[Paul Bunyan]

Release me from. Oh. Oh, you wonderful you. You beautiful.

[The 21st Girl]

Hey, Remember, you're not in love.

[Paul Bunyan]

Oh.

[Johnny Inkslinger]

Oh.

[Paul Bunyan]

Oh, yes.

[The 21st Girl]

Now sign this paper. It says that you promise you will never try to get married again.

[Paul Bunyan]

I'll sign. I'll sign.

[The 21st Girl]

Now you belong to us again. All of us, Paul. If one of us dropped out and you married the other 20, one of us would be jealous, would be hurt. And now you belong to us all, to the whole world. You're a legend, Paul. And we need you as a legend to belong to all of us. And you mustn't ever try to belong to just a few of us alone. You must always belong to all of us.

[Paul Bunyan]

A legend. That's what I am. I don't want to ever be anything else.

[The 21st Girl]

You mustn't. We need to believe in you. We have to have something to believe in. A legend of strength and power. A legend for us all. Not for just a few of us.

[Paul Bunyan]

And I'll be the best legend you ever believed in.

[The 21st Girl]

And you'll never be lonely.

[Paul Bunyan]

Never, if you all believe in me.

[The 21st Girl]

And you'll never try to stop being a legend.

[Paul Bunyan]

Never. I'll always be your greatest and best legend. A legend of strength and power for America. Goodbye, Paul Bunyan Goodbye, my 21st girl who wanted me for everybody.

[The 21st Girl]

Goodbye, Paul Bunyan we all love you.

[Paul Bunyan]

Foreign.

[Narrator/Announcer]

You've just heard the listeners playhouse. The 21st Girl by Albert N. Williams. Special music was by Tom Bennett, conducted by Joseph Stilpack. This National Broadcasting Company feature will bring you next week at the same time by Ranald R. McDougall. The Rebellion of Emory Sims. Listen. The part of paul bunyan was played by mark smith. Ink slinger peter arnold. The 21st girl, gertrude warner. This is the national broadcasting company, rca building, radio city, new york.