Podcast Summary: Harold’s Old Time Radio – “Nero Wolfe: The Squirt and the Monkey”

Episode: Nero Wolfe 82-03-20: The Squirt and the Monkey
Release Date: November 10, 2025
Podcast: Harold’s Old Time Radio
Host: Harold’s Old Time Radio
Source: Golden Age of Radio adaptation of Rex Stout’s Nero Wolfe story

Overview

This episode transports listeners into the world of Nero Wolfe as he and Archie Goodwin unravel a knotty puzzle involving stolen guns, comic-strip creators, and a murder in a household of creative egos. The story, “The Squirt and the Monkey,” is layered with insider squabbles, a dying monkey, and more than a few red herrings, all delivered in the classic hardboiled banter that defines the beloved detective series.

Key Discussion Points & Story Breakdown

1. The Case Begins: Stolen Gun and Eccentric Comics Creators

(Starts ~00:27)

• Archie Goodwin visits the home of Harry Colvin, creator of the Dazzle Dan comic strip, supposedly to consult on making Dazzle Dan a detective.
• Archie interacts with an argumentative and dysfunctional artistic household: Pat Lowell (Colvin’s manager), Pete Jordan and Byron Hildebrand (artists), and Adrian Getz (the "squirt") with his pet monkey, Rukaloo.
• Tensions around artistic credit, money, and frustration with the comic strip are established. Notably, Pat and Pete both voice their dissatisfaction with their roles.

Quote:

“Calling him something that will make him sore. And eventually I'll come to a boil and pure out of bread to make Adrian Getz sore. And I'll be fired. And I can be an artist again instead of doodling out Dazzle Dan. It's a plan.”
— Pete Jordan, (03:00)

• Archie is caught in this petty storm, wisecracking his way through the squabbles.

2. The "Detective Demonstration” and a Dead End

(Main action: 08:12–11:16, 13:25–17:39)

• Colvin claims he wants Archie to demonstrate how a detective searches for a missing gun, planning to stage a fake search for the benefit of his staff.
• The intention: Watch their faces for the guilty party when a duplicate gun is found in the desk.
• The personalities and motives for all present are given—secret resentments, job insecurity, and creative disputes.
• During preparations, Colvin stalls endlessly and tensions mount between Archie and the household’s prickly denizens.

Quote:

“Those who don't know you had a gun there. But they do know. All of them. Certainly. Everybody knows everything around here.”
— Harry Colvin, (09:32)

3. Murder Most Foul

(Discovery at 17:46)

• Archie discovers Adrian Getz dead on a sofa, shot in the head, and Rukaloo the monkey in the room clutching a warm gun (Archie’s own gun).
• The house erupts in confusion. Inspector Kramer is called and quickly fixates on Goodwin as the most likely suspect due to the gun and lack of license.
• Colvin provides a misleading story to police, framing Goodwin as the perpetrator.

Memorable Moment:

“The squirt was lying on the couch, but he wasn't taking a nap. The hole in his skull was just northeast of his right ear and the blood had run over the edge of the couch onto the floor. … Adrian Getz was through taking naps.”
— Archie Goodwin, (17:51)

4. Shifting Blame, Police Trouble, and Wolf’s Intervention

(Interrogation: 20:00–29:45)

• Goodwin is grilled by Kramer on charges relating to the unlicensed gun and the murder.
• Colvin, Hildebrand, and Ms. Lowell provide self-serving and contradictory stories, further muddying the waters and ensuring Goodwin’s difficulties.
• Wolf mounts a legal counterattack, planning to sue Colvin for slander and looking for holes in the suspects’ stories.
• Wolf immerses himself in several years of Dazzle Dan comic strips, looking for keys to motive.

5. Motives and Machinations

(Press and Gossip: 29:45–34:03)

• Archie and Wolf trade intel, identifying that all in the household had motives tied to Dazzle Dan’s success and their own positions:
  • Pat Lowell accused of chiseling royalties,
  • Hildebrand insecure about his job,
  • Jordan’s thwarted artistic ambitions,
  • Colvin’s apparent dependency on Getz for creative inspiration,
  • The possibility that Getz truly owned the strip and Colvin got only 10%.
• The comic strip is revealed to be an allegory for Colvin and Getz’s financial relationship.

Quote:

“It’s a childish allegory. AG are the initials Adrian Getz. Haggie Cruel has the same initials as you, Mr. Colvin. Now, it’s not credible that that’s coincidence not repeated annually.”
— Nero Wolfe, (53:24)

6. The Truth Revealed — The Classic Wolfe Denouement

(Wolf’s Office: 39:00–54:00)

• Wolf convenes all suspects for a final confrontation, secretly observed by Inspector Kramer.
• Wolfe dismantles everyone’s alibis and confirms that the killer returned Colvin’s gun to the desk Sunday morning so Hildebrand and Lowell would see it, before removing it again.
• Mrs. Marcel Colvin, Harry's wife, is unmasked as the killer through subtle testimony and deductions, motivated by her husband’s powerless status, Getz’s dominance, and their dysfunctional dynamic.

Climax Quote:

“No, madam. Your silliest mistake was opening the window to kill the monkey. But there were others, including underestimating my confidence in Mr. Goodwin.”
— Nero Wolfe, (55:00)

• It’s revealed that Marcel framed Archie and her husband by manipulating the gun scene and opening the window, which further endangered the monkey Getz loved.

7. Aftermath & Reflections

(Fallout: 54:12–56:00+)

• Characters reflect on the toxicity of the Dazzle Dan creative environment.
• The comic strip’s power dynamics, summed up in the annual “peach” allegory, are foregrounded as central to the murder motive.
• Wolfe coolly orchestrates the legal and personal consequences, with the promise that justice (and perhaps poetic retribution) will be served.

Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments (with Timestamps)

• Archie (on his role):

  “The only difference between me and a messenger boy was that I was taking a taxi instead of the subway to his house on 76th Street.”
  (00:27)

• Pete Jordan’s artistic frustration:

  “And eventually I'll come to a boil and pure out of bread to make Adrian Getz sore. And I'll be fired. And I can be an artist again...”
  (03:00)

• Discovery of the body:

  “The squirt was lying on the couch, but he wasn't taking a nap. The hole in his skull was just northeast of his right ear...”
  (17:51)

• Wolfe, on comic strip as allegory:

  “AG are the initials Adrian Getz. Haggie Cruel has the same initials as you, Mr. Colvin. … It’s a childish allegory.”
  (53:24)

• Confrontation Climax:

  “No, madam. Your silliest mistake was opening the window to kill the monkey. But there were others, including underestimating my confidence in Mr. Goodwin.”
  (55:00)

• Pat Lowell’s bitter summing up:

  “He was a vampire.”
  (54:12)

Timestamps for Important Segments

| Segment | Time | |-------------------------------------|-----------| | Intro, Setup & Character Banter | 00:27–05:40 | | Archie & Colvin’s Detective Demo Plan | 08:12–11:16 | | Discovery of Murder (Getz) | 17:46–18:00 | | Police Investigation and Interrogation | 20:00–29:45 | | Motives, Gossip, and Dazzle Dan Allegory | 29:45–34:03 | | Wolfe’s Final Confrontation (Revelation) | 39:00–55:00 | | Aftermath and Closing Reflections | 55:00–56:00+ |

Conclusion & Tone

The episode is a deliciously tangled web of witty repartee, bitter personal feuds, and classic detective deduction. Delivered with that characteristic blend of sardonic humor, impatience, and erudition, it’s a perfect specimen of the old-time radio mystery, showing how the rot at the heart of a creative partnership can, when seasoned with resentment and money, prove deadly.

For listeners new and old, “The Squirt and the Monkey” is both a classic Nero Wolfe puzzle and a sly commentary on showbiz egos, money, and the creative life.