On Stage 53-01-01 (01) The String Bow Tie

Summary

Podcast Summary: Harold's Old Time Radio
Episode: On Stage 53-01-01 (01) The String Bow Tie
Release Date: March 31, 2025

---

Introduction

Harold's Old Time Radio transports listeners back to the Golden Age of Radio, capturing the essence of an era where families gathered around the radio to enjoy beloved shows such as The Shadow, Abbott & Costello, Amos & Andy, and Dragnet. In the episode titled "The String Bow Tie," hosted by Harolds Old Time Radio, listeners are treated to a charming and suspenseful radio play that combines elements of comedy, drama, and mystery.

---

Overview of "The String Bow Tie"

"The String Bow Tie" is a radio play written by Morton Fine and David Friedkin, featuring the talents of actors Kathy Lewis and Elliot Lewis. The story revolves around Gerson Hapsmith (played by Elliot Lewis) and his wife Laurie Hap Smith (Kathy Lewis), navigating the complexities of sudden fame and the unintended consequences that follow.

---

Plot Summary

Opening Scenes

The play opens on New Year's Eve Afternoon with Laurie Hap Smith commuting home from work on the 7th Avenue subway. Laurie is depicted as a pleasant and accommodating character, working on a crossword puzzle and assisting a fellow passenger, Martha Wentworth, with a clue:

Kathy Lewis (Laurie): "16 down. It's Auk, A U, K. Now extinct. It's very cold in the Arctic."
[01:42]

Laurie’s interaction with Martha sets the stage for the underlying tension between everyday life and the intrusion of celebrity.

Introduction of Gerson Hapsmith

Laurie and Gerson Hapsmith are introduced as a happy couple living in New York City. Gerson's life takes an unexpected turn when he becomes the face of a new advertising campaign featuring a "string bow tie." This sudden fame leads to Gerson being recognized everywhere, much to Laurie’s distress.

Elliot Lewis (Gerson): "It's gonna be tough. What rhymes with Lemke? Come here, Laurie. Hi."
[04:18]

Laurie expresses her frustration with Gerson's newfound fame, highlighting the strain it places on their relationship.

Conflict with William Bailey

The plot thickens when William Bailey, portrayed by Sheldon, Leonard, and Mary Jane Croft’s friends, confronts Gerson. Bailey harbors a deep-seated hatred for Gerson, stemming from the advertising campaign that thrust him into the public eye wearing the distinctive string bow tie.

William Bailey: "It's on account of this string bow tie, huh?"
[13:02]

Bailey's antagonism escalates when he reveals a hidden agenda, leading to a tense encounter in a nightclub. He threatens Gerson, claiming ownership over his image and seeking to dismantle his newfound celebrity.

Key Confrontation:

William Bailey: "Touch that tie and I will break your arm. Here, here and here."
[15:54]

Gerson and Laurie find themselves in a perilous situation, navigating Bailey's threats while trying to protect their relationship and Gerson's dignity.

Climactic Resolution

The climax unfolds in the Hudson Tunnel, where Bailey attempts to assert control over Gerson. However, the couple's resilience and unity shine through as they confront Bailey together. Laurie defends Gerson vehemently, pleading for Bailey to leave them alone.

Kathy Lewis (Laurie): "I am honest, young lady."
[08:38]

In a dramatic turn, Gerson stands up to Bailey, refusing to back down despite the danger.

Elliot Lewis (Gerson): "This is madness. You hoodlum, renegade, malfactor, hoodlum."
[16:01]

The tension peaks as Bailey attempts to force Gerson into compliance, but Laurie’s unwavering support and Gerson's determination lead to Bailey retreating, resolving the immediate threat.

Conclusion and Teasers for Future Episodes

The play concludes with Gerson and Laurie reaffirming their commitment to each other, having overcome the challenges posed by unexpected fame and a vengeful antagonist. The episode wraps up with acknowledgments to guest actors and teases upcoming episodes, including a spy story titled The Drunken Sailor and a comedy about a nice girl and a bum by writer Richard Powell.

---

Character Breakdown

• Gerson Hapsmith (Elliot Lewis): The protagonist whose unexpected role in an advertising campaign leads to unforeseen complications. Gerson is portrayed as a diligent advertising agent who becomes entangled in his own image's popularity.

• Laurie Hap Smith (Kathy Lewis): Gerson's supportive and loving wife, navigating the challenges of her husband's sudden fame while maintaining their domestic harmony.

• William Bailey (Sheldon, Leonard, Mary Jane Croft): The antagonist with a vendetta against Gerson, seeking to undermine his reputation and disrupt his life due to personal grievances tied to the advertising campaign.

• Martha Wentworth (Martha Wentworth): A fellow subway passenger who inadvertently instigates conversations that reveal the tension between ordinary life and celebrity.

• Janice (Janice): A character who challenges Laurie and Gerson's portrayal, embodying the pressures of public perception.

---

Notable Quotes and Moments

1. Laurie's Crossword Puzzle Assistance:

   Laurie: "16 down. It's Auk, A U, K. Now extinct. It's very cold in the Arctic."
   [01:42]

2. Gerson's Reluctance Towards the Bow Tie:

   Gerson: "I didn't want to wear this string bow tie."
   [25:11]

3. Bailey's Threatening Confrontation:

   William Bailey: "Touch that tie and I will break your arm. Here, here and here."
   [15:54]

4. Laurie's Defiance:

   Laurie: "I am honest, young lady."
   [08:38]

5. Gerson's Stand Against Bailey:

   Gerson: "This is madness. You hoodlum, renegade, malfactor, hoodlum."
   [16:01]

6. Reaffirmation of Love:

   Gerson: "Don't you see? He's not for me anymore?"
   [22:28]

---

Themes and Insights

1. The Impact of Sudden Fame:

• The play explores how unexpected fame can strain personal relationships and alter one’s identity. Gerson’s transformation from a regular advertising agent to a public figure showcases the challenges of maintaining personal integrity amid public scrutiny.

2. Identity and Image:

• The string bow tie symbolizes the conflation of personal identity with commercial image. Gerson's struggle against being defined by an advertisement highlights the tension between one's true self and public persona.

3. Relationship Dynamics:

• Laurie and Gerson’s relationship serves as the emotional core of the story, illustrating how mutual support and understanding can overcome external pressures and conflicts.

4. Conflict and Resolution:

• The antagonistic relationship with William Bailey adds a layer of suspense, portraying how personal vendettas can escalate into dangerous confrontations. The resolution emphasizes the power of unity and resilience in overcoming adversity.

5. Societal Pressures:

• The play subtly critiques societal expectations and the commodification of individuals through advertising, questioning the ethical implications of using personal images for commercial gain.

---

Conclusion

The String Bow Tie is a captivating episode that blends humor, drama, and suspense to deliver a compelling narrative about love, identity, and the unforeseen consequences of fame. Through well-developed characters and engaging dialogue, the play invites listeners to reflect on the interplay between personal life and public image, all set against the nostalgic backdrop of the Golden Age of Radio.

Future episodes promise to continue this tradition of high-quality storytelling, enticing listeners with a variety of genres ranging from spy thrillers to heartfelt comedies.

---

Acknowledgments

The episode concludes with heartfelt thanks to guest actors Sheldon, Leonard, Mary Jane Croft, Vivi Janis, and Byron Cain for their contributions to bringing the characters to life. Additionally, the production team is recognized for their efforts in crafting an immersive and entertaining radio play experience.

Music and Production Credits:

• Theme: Written by Ray Noble
• Music Composition: Fred Steiner
• Conductor: Lud Galuskin
• Direction: Mr. Lewis
• Production: George Walsh

Harold's Old Time Radio invites listeners to journey back in time, reliving the magic of radio storytelling through meticulously crafted episodes like The String Bow Tie.

Transcript

[George Walsh]

Transcribed Kathy and Elliot Lewis on stage.

[Elliot Lewis]

Kathy Lewis. Elliot Lewis.

[George Walsh]

Two of the most distinguished names in radio, opening tonight in their own theater, starring in a repertory of stories of their own and your choosing radio's foremost players in radio's foremost plays. Drama, comedy, adventure, mystery, melodrama. Ladies and gentlemen, Mr. Elliot Lewis.

[Elliot Lewis]

Good evening. May I present my wife Kathy.

[Kathy Lewis]

Good evening.

[Elliot Lewis]

Tonight is our opening night, and tonight is the first day of the new year. So we're going to do a comedy for you to start our new series.

[Kathy Lewis]

Something like a spray of confetti to go with the season. A story about a young man and his wife in 1953. Nice people, not rich, not poor. Happy with each other, you know. Nice.

[Elliot Lewis]

So tonight we present String Bow Tie by Morten Fine and David Friedkin. My name in the play is Gerson.

[Kathy Lewis]

Hap Smith and I'm Laurie Hap Smith.

[Elliot Lewis]

And we're married and we live in New York. The opening scene has to do with Laurie. She's got a seat on the 7th Avenue subway. It's New Year's Eve afternoon and she's on her way home from work at the moment. She's upset because the seated man next to her is working the crossword puzzle and doesn't know the three letter word for the web footed diving bird of the Arctic sea. Laurie knows Auk. Hmm.

[Kathy Lewis]

16 down. It's Auk, A U, K. Now extinct. It's very cold in the Arctic.

[Elliot Lewis]

Here's the paper. You work it out?

[Kathy Lewis]

Yes, thank you. Bye.

[Elliot Lewis]

That's Laurie. Easy to get along with, even on a subway where people are pretty tough to get along with. To make a point out of it, Laurie, in a way she knows makes herself smaller so that very large woman will have ample room on the seat.

[Martha Wentworth]

You crowded, dear?

[Kathy Lewis]

No, not at all. Do you have a pencil?

[Martha Wentworth]

Oh, sure, sure, dearie. Wait, I'll find it somewhere. That got it here. Someplace in my voice. Oh, here.

[Kathy Lewis]

Thank you. I like to work crossword puzzles on my way home.

[Martha Wentworth]

Awk.

[Kathy Lewis]

Thanks.

[Martha Wentworth]

They're extinct now, dearie.

[Kathy Lewis]

Yes, I know.

[Martha Wentworth]

Zowie.

[Kathy Lewis]

Which one, honey? Across or down?

[Martha Wentworth]

Up there on the advertisement.

[Kathy Lewis]

Where?

[Martha Wentworth]

See the one between the termite service and the cheese crackers. Zowie.

[Kathy Lewis]

Oh, you mean the picture of the man in the string bow tie sitting at the piano.

[Martha Wentworth]

Schetto. A man's cologne to quicken the pulse of women. You know something? Why, I understand perfectly the emotions of those four women seated at his feet. Oh, look at that man, dearie.

[Kathy Lewis]

Uh huh.

[Martha Wentworth]

Let me know when we get to Times Square. Yesterday I ended up in Bronx park, just staring at him. That fellow's a real beauty.

[Kathy Lewis]

You really think so, huh?

[Martha Wentworth]

Just me. Well, you're all over town. Ladies standing around, staring, admiring. Oh, no wonder, the way he sits there at the piano, hands poised over who knows what strange melody, the grace of that fellow. The passion.

[Kathy Lewis]

He's my husband.

[Martha Wentworth]

Down to his fingertips, smoldering. Written all over him.

[Kathy Lewis]

He's my husband. Ah. Honest.

[Martha Wentworth]

What's his name?

[Kathy Lewis]

Gerson.

[Martha Wentworth]

Gerson. Gerson what?

[Kathy Lewis]

Gerson Hapsmith.

[Martha Wentworth]

Dearie.

[Kathy Lewis]

What?

[Martha Wentworth]

Let me ask you something.

[Kathy Lewis]

No. Zowie, honey, this is Times Square.

[Martha Wentworth]

Who needs it? I've got a little shopping to do in Bronx Park.

[Kathy Lewis]

Gerson, I'm home. Gerson?

[Elliot Lewis]

Oh, hi.

[Kathy Lewis]

How you doing?

[Elliot Lewis]

I was trying to write a slogan for the agency.

[Kathy Lewis]

What account?

[Elliot Lewis]

Lemke. Water Biscuit account.

[Kathy Lewis]

Hmm.

[Elliot Lewis]

It's gonna be tough. What rhymes with Lemke? Come here, Laurie. Hi.

[Kathy Lewis]

Mm. I want to tell you something, lover.

[Elliot Lewis]

What?

[Kathy Lewis]

It happened again today on the subway. Mm.

[Elliot Lewis]

Did I have a big house?

[Kathy Lewis]

Mobbed. Then there was a woman who sat next to me.

[Elliot Lewis]

Blonde? Brunette?

[Kathy Lewis]

Both. Oh, honey, you're the heartbeat of the subway circuit. You know what that woman said about your picture? Zowie.

[Elliot Lewis]

You don't know the half of it.

[Kathy Lewis]

Tell me the half of it.

[Elliot Lewis]

Mr. Honeywell at the agency called me in and said they formed a fan club in Bronx Park.

[Kathy Lewis]

Do me a favor, Gerson?

[Elliot Lewis]

Sure.

[Kathy Lewis]

Kiss me.

[Elliot Lewis]

Anytime.

[Kathy Lewis]

Oh. 5 million quickening pulses in New York. Gerson, you're my man.

[Elliot Lewis]

Yeah, baby. Baby.

[Kathy Lewis]

Mm.

[Elliot Lewis]

You jealous?

[Kathy Lewis]

Why should I be jealous? Just to be Mrs. Hapsmith is all I ever wanted.

[Elliot Lewis]

It's crazy the way it happened. Four years ago when the model didn't show up, Mr. Honeywell tapped me for the job, pulled me away from my typewriter, thrust a string bow tie in.

[Kathy Lewis]

My hand and said, this is it, Habsmith.

[William Bailey]

No.

[Elliot Lewis]

No, he didn't. He just told me to climb into the bow tie and run upstairs and sit in front of the piano. Four years ago. And they just released it. Now my picture's in every bus and subway in New York. You know what Mr. Honeywell said to me today?

[Kathy Lewis]

He asked you for the bow tie?

[Elliot Lewis]

No. He said, this is it, Hapsmith. We've just landed the Nine Star Meat account. I want you to pose for it in Mutton Chop Whiskers.

[Kathy Lewis]

Oh, no, you won't. Not my Gerson. Not in Mutton Chop.

[Elliot Lewis]

That's what I told Mr. Honeywell. The place in an advertising agency for me is in back of A typewriter making up slogans.

[Kathy Lewis]

That's telling, Mr. Honeywell.

[William Bailey]

Yeah.

[Elliot Lewis]

Come on, let's get dressed. Baby. New Year's Eve, Manhattan. You wear the off the shoulder.

[Kathy Lewis]

All right? You wear something for me, too.

[Elliot Lewis]

What?

[Kathy Lewis]

The string bow tie?

[Elliot Lewis]

You kidding?

[Kathy Lewis]

I want to show you off.

[Elliot Lewis]

Oh, you're kidding.

[Kathy Lewis]

To all of New York, the man in this string bow tie is mock.

[Elliot Lewis]

Now, listen, baby, I.

[Kathy Lewis]

That the woman behind the man who quickens the pulses is me. No, but, baby, you just run along, slip into that bow. Tigers.

[Elliot Lewis]

I don't even know how to tie it. Mr. Honeywell tied it for me.

[Kathy Lewis]

Anything Honeywell can do for you, I.

[Elliot Lewis]

Can do Mr. Honeywell.

[Kathy Lewis]

Big deal.

[Elliot Lewis]

You really want me to. Please, baby. You don't have to say please to me, Gerson.

[Kathy Lewis]

Just go get the bow tie.

[Carolyn]

Yeah.

[Elliot Lewis]

There's a seat. Come on.

[Kathy Lewis]

Oh, I don't know why Kirsten used to go out on New Year's Eve. Everything is so wonderful. Even a crowded subway.

[Elliot Lewis]

I want to tell you something.

[Kathy Lewis]

What?

[Elliot Lewis]

Here we are, 12ft underground.

[Kathy Lewis]

It figures. There's two of us.

[Elliot Lewis]

No, I mean here we are, you and I, rushing around in a subway in a crowd of people.

[Kathy Lewis]

It's not crowded. Down the other end of the car, Gerson. Why did you have to. Right under your picture.

[Elliot Lewis]

Let me finish, will you?

[Kathy Lewis]

Sorry.

[Elliot Lewis]

Crowd of people. And I feel like we're alone, Laurie, hurtling through space. Alone.

[Janice]

Pardon me, please. Could I just squeeze in here?

[Elliot Lewis]

Well, here, I'll get up.

[Janice]

Oh, no, you don't. You just sit there. I'll squeeze in between you. You mind scootching over a little, madam? There we are.

[Kathy Lewis]

Gerson.

[Elliot Lewis]

I'm over here. Laurie.

[Carolyn]

Mister?

[Elliot Lewis]

Yeah?

[Janice]

Your skirt's out, aren't you? When you got on, I told my girlfriend, Janice, there's skirts of the man in the string bow tie. And Janice said to me, she said, every time you get on the subway, you start dreaming.

[Elliot Lewis]

Oh, really?

[Carolyn]

Janice.

[Elliot Lewis]

Janice. It's him.

[Janice]

Wave to Janice.

[Elliot Lewis]

Yes, all right. Hi, Janice.

[Kathy Lewis]

Young lady.

[Janice]

Listen, madam, you've had him since 23rd Street. Don't be a hog.

[Kathy Lewis]

I'm going to feel silly saying it, but I'm going to say it. This man is mine.

[Janice]

Ha, ha, ha, ha. Put your money where your mouth is, madam.

[Kathy Lewis]

Ask him.

[Janice]

I. Scherzo. Are you hers?

[Elliot Lewis]

She's my wife.

[Janice]

Well, if she is your wife, pray tell, who are those four girls on the advertisement who are scattered beneath your piano?

[Elliot Lewis]

Well, they're models, that's all. Just girls.

[Martha Wentworth]

That's all.

[Kathy Lewis]

I am honest, young lady.

[Janice]

Yes, madam.

[Kathy Lewis]

Beat it. Blow. Go tell Janice. She wants you.

[Janice]

Look, madam, you might be married to him and all, but I'd like to explain the facts of life to you. The minute he got up in that advertisement, he belonged to humanity. Female type. Can I fix your bow tie, sketcher?

[Elliot Lewis]

Yes, go right ahead.

[Kathy Lewis]

Here's where we get off, Gerson.

[Elliot Lewis]

No, the lady just wanted.

[Kathy Lewis]

You belong to humanity, Gerson. And they're waiting for you up there. Let's hurry before the door slams in your face. Gerson.

[William Bailey]

Mm.

[Kathy Lewis]

You do a stunning waltz.

[Elliot Lewis]

4. 4 is my favorite tempo.

[Kathy Lewis]

I'm having a lovely time.

[Elliot Lewis]

Me too.

[Kathy Lewis]

Oh, just dancing like this. Beautiful cafe.

[Carolyn]

Champagne.

[Kathy Lewis]

You feel the champagne, honey?

[Elliot Lewis]

Me too.

[Kathy Lewis]

Me too.

[Elliot Lewis]

Let's go back to the table and have some more champagne. I love that song.

[Kathy Lewis]

What song?

[Elliot Lewis]

Song? The orchestra is just playing Tennessee Walls. Let it be our song, huh?

[Carolyn]

Yeah.

[Janice]

All.

[Elliot Lewis]

Here'S our table. What are you singing?

[Kathy Lewis]

Our song.

[Elliot Lewis]

That's not the Tennessee Walls, baby. Our song goes like this.

[Kathy Lewis]

Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, my father.

[William Bailey]

Pardon me, friend.

[Elliot Lewis]

Yes, what is it?

[William Bailey]

You the boy that posed for that perfume man?

[Kathy Lewis]

Give him your autograph to you?

[Elliot Lewis]

Yeah, sure.

[William Bailey]

Wait. Don't bother with the pencil, friend. Just a question. Are you?

[Elliot Lewis]

Am I what?

[William Bailey]

The buster who sits at the piano. See, I only ask because you're wearing a bowtie like him. You got a face like him. The only difference is you only got one dame and no piano.

[Elliot Lewis]

Come here.

[William Bailey]

I'll tell you. Yeah?

[Elliot Lewis]

I happen to be that chap.

[William Bailey]

Uh huh. Well, I'll tell you what chap I happen to be. Mm. Just put your hand in my pocket and feel. That's right. Now, now take your hand out. What did you feel there?

[Elliot Lewis]

A Smith Wesson 38. Snub nose series, 1927. Hey, Laurie, you know what was in his pocket? A Smith Wesson 38.

[Kathy Lewis]

Check, dear, and let's leave.

[William Bailey]

Sit down, lady. I said sit down. You're him, huh? Mustard?

[Elliot Lewis]

Sure.

[William Bailey]

That's all I want to know, both of you.

[Kathy Lewis]

You talk to me like that again and I'll scream.

[William Bailey]

Well, before you do, lady, I want to tell you something. You. You know the Hudson tunnel?

[Elliot Lewis]

Sure. We take from them all the time when we go to Jersey.

[William Bailey]

Yeah. Well, you know that concrete pedestal that the policeman stands on? It's just before you hit the Jersey sign.

[Elliot Lewis]

I know it very well. You remember it, Laurie.

[Kathy Lewis]

It's my favorite.

[William Bailey]

Yeah, mine too. That particular concrete pedestal is composed of five ingredients. Sand, cement and three of my favorite boys. Just because they wouldn't pay any attention to me so would you please. Would you pay attention to me?

[Kathy Lewis]

We're all ears.

[William Bailey]

Show up, both of you. Now, let's go celebrate New Year's Eve, shall we? My way.

[George Walsh]

You're listening to Kathy and Elliot Lewis on stage. Tonight's play, the String Bow Tie.

[Elliot Lewis]

Lori?

[Kathy Lewis]

Yes, dear?

[Elliot Lewis]

Is he still there?

[Kathy Lewis]

Yes, dear.

[William Bailey]

Keep walking. Tomorrow. But it occurs.

[Kathy Lewis]

Look. Look, mister. Why are you doing this to us? You want our money? What?

[William Bailey]

Keep walking.

[Kathy Lewis]

But who are you? Why are you picking on us?

[William Bailey]

1953 is going to be a nice year. So do yourselves a favor. Live through it. All right, in the back. All of us. Come on, let's go. All right, Thomas, take us home.

[Elliot Lewis]

Yes, sir, Mr. Bailey. Um, mister.

[William Bailey]

Yeah?

[Elliot Lewis]

It's on account of this string bow tie, huh?

[William Bailey]

It's on account of that. Hey, buster.

[Elliot Lewis]

Me?

[William Bailey]

Yeah. How come that when you stuck your hand in my pocket, you knew right away, without looking that the gun was a smitten Wesson.38 snub nose series, 1927.

[Elliot Lewis]

I work in an advertising agency. I wrote a slogan for it for catalog.

[William Bailey]

Oh, yeah?

[Elliot Lewis]

How to go use a Smith Wesson and be sure.

[William Bailey]

Oh, you know. You just happen to be the fellow who made me switch from a Colt.45.

[Kathy Lewis]

I hate to louse up your testimonial, but I'd like to point a few things out to you.

[William Bailey]

You're entitled.

[Kathy Lewis]

This is a very serious offense. Kidnapping us out of a nightclub, taking us to a place or places unknown. And for such a flimsy reason because my husband is on a subway card.

[William Bailey]

I hate him.

[Elliot Lewis]

Me? What did I ever do to you?

[William Bailey]

You'll see.

[Elliot Lewis]

Look, sir, I just happen to be a fella named Gerson Hapsman.

[William Bailey]

I just happen to be a fella named William Bailey who hates you.

[Kathy Lewis]

Where are you taking us?

[William Bailey]

You'll see.

[Kathy Lewis]

Gerson.

[Elliot Lewis]

What?

[Kathy Lewis]

Say something. Make Mr. Bailey realize that he's not dealing with a cardboard personality. Make him know what's in store for him if he doesn't let us off right away.

[William Bailey]

Yeah, make me do that.

[Elliot Lewis]

Go on, Mr. Bailey.

[William Bailey]

Yeah.

[Elliot Lewis]

This is madness.

[Kathy Lewis]

That's all you're going to say. Gerson. Gerson, you're my man.

[Elliot Lewis]

Yeah. Yeah, Mr. Bailey.

[William Bailey]

Yeah.

[Elliot Lewis]

You don't think you're gonna get away with this, do you? What's the big idea of holding a gun on us and marching us out of a nightclub? Making us walk down the street, making us get into a long black car and driving us away? What's the big idea of that, huh? This is civilization we got going for us here. Fella, there's no place in it for the primitive, the predatory emotion. You say you hate me. I don't hate you. My wife doesn't hate you, although the seed is there. You think the world's against you, don't you? Well, somewhere down the line you've been tricked, Mr. Bailey. Bill. Disillusioned. Oh, now look, just because I posed for an ad. Hey, I know what. I'll take off the string bow tie.

[William Bailey]

Touch that tie and I will break your arm. Here, here and here.

[Kathy Lewis]

Listen, you.

[Elliot Lewis]

You hoodlum, renegade, malfactor, hoodlum.

[Kathy Lewis]

You listen to me, you hoodlum. You leave my husband alone. It isn't his fault. He's wearing that string bow tie. I made him put it on. Anything that's going to happen should happen to me, not him.

[William Bailey]

Maybe.

[Carolyn]

Maybe what?

[William Bailey]

A dame in a Hudson tunnel. A dame? That'll pose quite a problem for our concrete mixer. Wonder if he knows the recipe. Just flop, people. Come on inside.

[Kathy Lewis]

Oh, my.

[William Bailey]

Uh huh. You like it, eh?

[Kathy Lewis]

Oh, well, you must be the greatest toodlum of them all to be able to afford this, Mr. Bailey. Well furnished in such beautiful taste. Such exquisite decor. You ought to be proud of this place.

[William Bailey]

Oh, yes, I am. I am. And I can tell you this lady, there is never gonna be another place like it.

[Kathy Lewis]

The decorator. Yeah, Hudson Sung.

[William Bailey]

The one in the middle. Yeah. Carolyn, that's you. Billy, it's me. It's me. Come on out here. I got something for you.

[Carolyn]

Oh, Billy, you brought him. Hi.

[Elliot Lewis]

Me?

[Carolyn]

You're cute.

[Kathy Lewis]

Him?

[William Bailey]

He's cute, Carolyn.

[Carolyn]

My, he's cute.

[William Bailey]

You like him, huh?

[Carolyn]

Tell him to walk around.

[Elliot Lewis]

Walk? Walk? What do you mean?

[William Bailey]

Listen, you. My wife wants you to walk, so do it.

[Elliot Lewis]

I don't understand.

[William Bailey]

I'll stick his head right in the light socket. So help me out.

[Elliot Lewis]

Wait a minute.

[Kathy Lewis]

Wait, wait, wait, wait a minute. I'll explain it to him. Gerson. Honey, the man's got a gun. He's pointing it at you. You. He wants you to walk. You know how that bit goes? First this foot and then that foot and before you know.

[Elliot Lewis]

Okay, okay. Yeah.

[William Bailey]

All right, that's enough. Come back. Well, Cute. You know why I brought him here, Carolyn?

[Carolyn]

Because you love me. Billy. Billy loves me.

[William Bailey]

I brought him here so that you can see in a flesh this guy that you have been moping over since you saw that advertisement in the subway.

[Carolyn]

Billy's good to me. What's your name, cutie?

[Elliot Lewis]

Gerson.

[Carolyn]

You see, Billy, I told you.

[Kathy Lewis]

You guessed his name was Gerson.

[Carolyn]

He's cute. She.

[William Bailey]

Carolyn. Carolyn, I'm talking to you.

[Carolyn]

Yeah.

[William Bailey]

I want to prove to you, Carolyn, that this Geyson who sits in front of a piano on the Schoitzo cologne ad, he is a Geyson like any other Geyson. He's just a guy, see? He is not somebody who every morning, noon and night you say to me, why ain't you like him, Billy?

[Carolyn]

Well, look at him. You ain't.

[William Bailey]

I can see that. The only way to have peace and quiet around here is to do what we come here to do. So get the bottle, Carolyn.

[Carolyn]

All right, Here it is.

[William Bailey]

You ever seen a bottle of this stuff, Grayson?

[Elliot Lewis]

Oh, yeah, sure. That's Scherzo, the men's cologne that me and my bow tie and the piano are supposed to quicken pulses with. It's the large economy synthetic.

[William Bailey]

Have some.

[Kathy Lewis]

Now, look, Mr. Bailey, Gerson just dabs that stuff behind his ears. He doesn't drink it.

[Elliot Lewis]

All right, mister, you got us up here and threw a bottle of cologne in my face. Now what do you want me to do?

[William Bailey]

See that piano?

[Elliot Lewis]

Sure.

[William Bailey]

Play?

[Elliot Lewis]

Sure. Then we can go.

[Kathy Lewis]

He can't play.

[William Bailey]

You see, Carolyn can't even play.

[Kathy Lewis]

So goodbye to one and all.

[Elliot Lewis]

Who says I can't play? Hey.

[Janice]

Play.

[Elliot Lewis]

Sure.

[William Bailey]

Well, that's good. That's fine. Great. I'm glad that you can, so we can clear this up. Listen, Geyson, you got the bow tie, you stink of scoitzo, and now you're going to play. There is just one thing. You quicken my wife's pulse and you are dead. So go play.

[Carolyn]

Oh, my. You like that? Go. Go.

[William Bailey]

Lady.

[Kathy Lewis]

What?

[William Bailey]

Please note the vein of my wife's throat. There is a tribe there that wasn't there before. It's been 17 years since I have seen that tribe. Why that.

[Kathy Lewis]

No, no, no. Just take it easy, Mr. Bailey. For eating. Carolyn. Carolyn. He is good, isn't he, Carolyn?

[Carolyn]

Good?

[Kathy Lewis]

Look at him. The way he sits there.

[Carolyn]

The way he sits there.

[Kathy Lewis]

Fingers poised over who knows what. Strange melody.

[Carolyn]

Strange melody.

[Kathy Lewis]

The talents that Gerson has. Tell me, tell me all sorts of things.

[William Bailey]

Tell your husband to turn around because I hate to give it to folks in the back.

[Kathy Lewis]

Just one second more, Mr. Bailey. Carolyn, honey.

[Carolyn]

Yeah?

[Kathy Lewis]

He does all sorts of things. You think his piano playing is good?

[Martha Wentworth]

Oh, I do.

[Carolyn]

I do.

[Kathy Lewis]

You want to hear him whistle?

[Carolyn]

Oh, my, yes. Grace.

[Elliot Lewis]

Just a minute. Yes, ma'am.

[Carolyn]

Whistle.

[Elliot Lewis]

Whistle. What?

[Carolyn]

Well, I don't know anything.

[Kathy Lewis]

Our song, Gerson.

[Elliot Lewis]

Oh, yes, Will. All right.

[Carolyn]

Oh, my.

[Kathy Lewis]

You like that?

[Carolyn]

The Tennessee Waltz is my favorite.

[Kathy Lewis]

That does it. You can have him. Don't you see? He's not for me anymore?

[William Bailey]

What do you mean?

[Kathy Lewis]

Those two made for each other. Listen to me, Mr. Bailey. Bill, why should I try to fight it, or you?

[William Bailey]

Why don't I just kill him?

[Kathy Lewis]

That's a good idea. Don't you see? It's the only way. Get him out of our lives once and for all. This. This. This man, this monster, this wrecker of homes.

[Elliot Lewis]

Hey, Laurie.

[Kathy Lewis]

Be quiet, you wrecker of homes. No.

[Elliot Lewis]

Hey, Laurie.

[Kathy Lewis]

Now, I said be quiet.

[William Bailey]

What kind of a way is that for a lady to talk to her husband?

[Elliot Lewis]

Yeah.

[Kathy Lewis]

This man gets his face displayed in the subway and what happens after eight years? He's not mine anymore. He belongs to the world. Who needs him?

[William Bailey]

Hey, lady, that is your husband?

[Elliot Lewis]

Yeah.

[Kathy Lewis]

Cute. And after 18 years, your life. What is it? Shambles. Get rid of him, lady. Do it now.

[William Bailey]

Lady, he's your husband.

[Kathy Lewis]

You'll be doing a good deed.

[William Bailey]

There is no way to talk about your husband. Now, look, I'm older than you and I know you. You hate a fellow when you talk about him like that.

[Elliot Lewis]

Yeah.

[Carolyn]

Poor boy.

[William Bailey]

Yeah. You're married to him, so be married to. Through thick and thin.

[Elliot Lewis]

Yeah.

[William Bailey]

It's the only way we know, Carolyn and I. Yeah. Yeah. Come here. Sit by me, Carolyn. Here by my feet. Now, where was I?

[Kathy Lewis]

Through thick and thin yeah.

[William Bailey]

Through thick and thin yeah the years come and the years go but it is always a pleasant thing to have by your side One's Help me, dear.

[Kathy Lewis]

Billy, move over, honey. I want to sit by his feet, too.

[William Bailey]

As one sails his ship through the great sea of life Knocked about by the storm and a strike.

[Elliot Lewis]

Let me sit down, too. Pardon me.

[Kathy Lewis]

You settle I by the storm and the strife yeah.

[William Bailey]

Knocked about by those things. When one has a friend one reaches calm waters Billy. Yeah?

[Carolyn]

I feel so sentimental.

[Elliot Lewis]

Me too.

[Carolyn]

Play something for us, Billy, on the piano.

[William Bailey]

Aw, go ahead.

[Kathy Lewis]

Come on.

[William Bailey]

Well, all right.

[Carolyn]

He's been taking lessons for almost a month now since your ad appeared. Gerson.

[Kathy Lewis]

Gerson.

[Elliot Lewis]

Mm.

[Carolyn]

Come on, let's steal away.

[Kathy Lewis]

Soft.

[Elliot Lewis]

Yeah.

[William Bailey]

All right.

[Elliot Lewis]

Uh, Mr. Bailey.

[William Bailey]

Yeah.

[Elliot Lewis]

Bye now. Have a happy New Year.

[William Bailey]

Yeah. You too. Remember what I told you, lady.

[Kathy Lewis]

I'll remember.

[Elliot Lewis]

Ooh. You satisfying?

[Kathy Lewis]

Very. I saved your life.

[Elliot Lewis]

You almost got me killed. You and your ideas. I didn't want to wear this string bow tie.

[Kathy Lewis]

Yes, dear. Ring for the elevator, dear.

[Elliot Lewis]

Well, come on, Laurie. Let's go out into the world and have us a happy New Year.

[Martha Wentworth]

Can you make room for me, dearie?

[Kathy Lewis]

Oh, sure.

[Martha Wentworth]

Say, Don't I know you?

[Kathy Lewis]

Oh, of course. We talked the other day. I borrowed a pencil from you to do a crossword puzzle.

[Martha Wentworth]

I know you. You're the girl who's married to that man in the string bow tie.

[Kathy Lewis]

That's right.

[Martha Wentworth]

Whatever happened to him?

[Kathy Lewis]

What do you mean?

[Martha Wentworth]

He's not up there in the ad anymore. Now there's another gent. The man standing by a fireplace with those four hounds at his feet. That man. And that ad there in Mutton Chop Whiskers.

[Kathy Lewis]

Oh, Zoe, you like him as well as the man in the string bow tie.

[Martha Wentworth]

Oh, better, better. Look at those whiskers, dear. How would you like to run your hand through them?

[Kathy Lewis]

I have.

[Elliot Lewis]

Huh?

[Kathy Lewis]

He's my husband.

[Martha Wentworth]

Him too.

[Kathy Lewis]

Oh.

[Martha Wentworth]

What did you do with the other one? Get rid of him.

[Carolyn]

New Year.

[Martha Wentworth]

Oh, dearie. Let me ask you something about the new one in the Mutton Chop Whiskers.

[George Walsh]

So weep the string Bow Tie, starring Kathy and Elliot Lewis. Now, once again, Mr. And Mrs. Lewis.

[Kathy Lewis]

We'd like to thank our good friends Sheldon, Leonard and Mary Jane Croft, who came down tonight to help us start the new year and our new series by playing Mr. And Mrs. Bill Bailey.

[Elliot Lewis]

Yes, and Martha Wentworth, the lady on the subway. Vivi Janis, who helped fix my tie. And Byron Cain, who couldn't spell awk. Now, next week, Kathy.

[Kathy Lewis]

Well, just before we went into rehearsal today, we got a copy of next week's play, the Drunken Sailor. It was written for us by a very fine new radio writer, Richard Chandley. It's a spy story. Exciting and. Well, you'll see.

[Elliot Lewis]

Yeah. And a week after that, a comedy about a nice girl and a bum written for us by Richard Powell.

[Kathy Lewis]

Thank you all for listening. A very happy new year. Good night.

[Elliot Lewis]

Good night.

[George Walsh]

The String Bow Tie was written by Morton Fine and David Friedkin. The theme for Kathy and Elliot Lewis on stage was written by Ray Noble. Music for the program was composed by Fred Steiner and conducted by Lud Galuskin. Kathy and Elliot Lewis on stage is transcribed and directed by Mr. Lewis. George Walsh speaking. And remember, John Lund. As yours truly, Johnny Dollar, brings you colorful mystery Friday nights on the CBS Radio Network.