Transcript

Sponsor Announcer (0:00)

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Ben (0:09)

In this episode of the Graveyard Shift, we hear from an anonymous listener who has a very fascinating story about psychedelic use and quitting psychedelics.

Anonymous Guest (0:16)

And then it went all the way up to what they call a hero's dose. You can experience ego death, which means you lose the concept of yourself. Ego, right, yeah. Of yourself. It kept trying to lure me further in, further in. And the more I kept looking at this door, the more it kept insist. I was like, wait a minute, I think I can read what the words are on the door. The, the words were the ego death.

Ben (0:37)

It's centric. It's like totally self centric. It serves you 100% right. But nobody else.

Brian Sauvay (0:42)

Like you knew it was spiritual. You knew there was some spiritual element, but you were filtering it through and saying, you know, I'm accessing God. This is to God's glory.

Ben (1:01)

Hey everybody. Welcome to this episode of the Graveyard Shift with Haunted Cosmos, a special new interview style show that we're doing in the off season where we bring in people to the studio or have them call into the studio and tell us their craziest paranormal or high strangeness story today. I am joined of course by my co host, Brian Sauvay. Brian, say hello.

Brian Sauvay (1:22)

Dude, it is so good to be here. Graveyard shifting it with you guys.

Ben (1:25)

It's so late.

Brian Sauvay (1:26)

It is so late.

Ben (1:27)

It's so moody.

Brian Sauvay (1:28)

The fire's crackling.

Ben (1:30)

It's actually 8:57am the mood is set. The mood is set.

Brian Sauvay (1:35)

I think you know what we mean. I think you understand the implication.

Ben (1:37)

Yeah. We tried to emphasize moodiness in this set. We also are joined by a very special guest who will remain nameless because he wishes to be anonymous as he tells the story. So everyone please give a warm welcome to Anonymous.

Summary

Haunted Cosmos: Graveyard Shift - "Psychedelic Demons"

Episode Date: October 1, 2025
Hosts: Ben Garrett & Brian Sauvé
Guest: Anonymous

Episode Overview

This Graveyard Shift episode features an intense, deeply personal story from an anonymous listener about his journey through heavy psychedelic and cannabis use. The episode explores the overlap between the spiritual and material worlds, touching on themes of deception, spiritual warfare, and the unexpected ways God intervenes. The central question: are psychedelic experiences merely psychological, or are they gateways to demonic influences?

Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Introduction to the Guest’s Story

Background:
- The guest was introduced to psilocybin (magic mushrooms) by a church friend interested in microdosing for "biohacking" and improved work performance.
- This led to frequent experimentation with both mushrooms and cannabis, including eventually growing mushrooms himself.
- The guest describes the normalization of microdosing in the tech world as a search for performance enhancement and even spiritual progress.
  - “It was more of a way for me to kind of ... enhance your performance at work, you can think better, be more creative.” (08:31)
Christian Conflict:
- Despite deepening substance usage, the guest remained active in church, even consulting his pastor, who compared psychedelics to medicine and gave tacit approval (12:53).
- He describes convincing himself—and attempting to convince others—that these substances were “gifts from God,” linking Christian concepts (“die to yourself”) to psychedelic terms like “ego death.”
  - “...the whole idea of die to yourself... I associated with ego death.” (13:19)
Evangelizing Psychedelics:
- The guest admits he began persuading Christians to try psychedelics for spiritual reasons, later repenting for this after recognizing it as sin and deception.
  - “I actually went to each one of them and repented and I asked for the forgiveness.” (14:05)
  - “A lot of them, a couple guys were like, I knew you were kind of crazy...” (14:12)

2. The Vision: A Psychedelic Encounter

Set & Setting:
- After taking three grams of mushrooms (and augmenting the effect with strong cannabis), he experienced a powerful altered state—a trance-like separation from his body.
  - “It was more than double as far as, like, I was out... The best way to explain it is it felt like I was detached from my body and I kind of drifted into a trance.” (16:03)
Vision Details:
- Envisioned underground tunnels leading to a massive blue-lit void, feeling profound peace and "bliss" (17:14).
- An entity (with a blue glow) attempted to lead him further into the void, but could not touch him—his consent was required.
  - “This thing appeared to have a mission to take me deeper... It felt like two entities. It felt like the entity in front of me was drawing me in toward another entity.” (18:36)
  - “I had to make a decision to follow.” (21:46)
Confrontation and Revelation:
- As he fixated on the shed door where he often smoked, he perceived words he’d previously burned into the wood: “Soli Deo Gloria” and a cross.
  - “The words were Soli deo gloria that I had burned into the door over months. And the shape was a cross, actually.” (22:41)
- Realizing the experience was a “cheap counterfeit” rather than God, he rejected the entity by internally invoking Christ’s name and recalling the cross:
  - “I said, wait, this isn't God. This is a cheap counterfeit. And then I told it, like, you're not the one that died on that cross... The glory is not yours.” (23:38)
  - The vision immediately dissipated, confirming for him its demonic nature:
  - “The moment I thought his name is when everything went away. ...That was demonic.” (24:31, 25:00)

3. Aftermath and Spiritual Clarity

Breaking Away:
- Inspired by an earlier Haunted Cosmos episode on psychedelics, he quit all drug use "cold turkey," despite withdrawal agony.
  - “So I quit, like taking any kind... I quit cold turkey, like from one day to another, which was absolutely miserable from listening to the episode and being convicted that I had been sinning against God.” (26:49)
- He describes the spiritual lesson:
  - “I was literally cheating on God with the idea of different entities. I'm still God's though. And so at that point it's like, okay, now it's up to you...” (26:49)
- Repercussions included total disruption of family and work life—his wife thought she might "have to get a different husband," and he describes being emotionally and spiritually hollow (40:17).

4. Spiritual Implications and Reflections

Agency & Temptation:
- Hosts draw parallels to demonology folklore, emphasizing that evil entities require consent—"inviting" moments are needed (“vampire can’t cross the threshold”), spiritual sovereignty remains with the person.
  - “There's still a kind of permission... they're trying to be invited in... A lot of demonic phenomenon is aiming to persuade, deceive a person into saying, I want this.” (31:23–32:38)
True Peace vs. Counterfeit Experiences:
- The guest insists, “God's peace isn't cheap. It's not like, take this pill and you'll experience peace.” (36:23)
- Hosts note that Christ’s sacrifice yields genuine peace and flourishing for others, contrasting starkly with the “ego death” of psychedelics, which is self-centered and leaves others deprived.
  - “The ego death is... totally self-centric. It serves you 100% right. But nobody else...” (39:03)
  - “When Christ died to himself, it benefited the world. ...When a Christian man dies to himself, it actually leads to the flourishing and good of his wife and children and community at large.” (40:00, Ben)
Obedience and Sanctification:
- The conversation concludes with reflections on true sanctification, obedience, and the humility required to trust God versus seeking shortcuts to peace or spiritual experiences.
  - “True peace is not found away from reality, but... is found in accepting the condition in which God has placed us.” (41:06)
  - Parallels are drawn to Paralandra and the necessity of obedience even when one does not understand. (49:44)

Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

Anonymous Guest on Deception in Psychedelic Spirituality:
- "I believed. I was convinced that this was from God." (13:18)
- "The whole idea of die to yourself... I associated with ego death." (13:19)
- “This isn't God. This is a cheap counterfeit. ...The moment I thought his name [Jesus] is when everything went away.” (23:38–25:00)
On the Necessity of Consent to Evil:
- Brian: "There's still a kind of sovereignty of a person. ...It's a limit that I think God places. No, you have to want this. I can't just drag you in." (33:29–34:19)
On the Dangers and False Promises of Psychedelics:
- "God's peace isn't cheap. It's not like, take this pill and you'll experience peace." (36:23)
- “Psychedelics are not for Christians to use... I still have Christian friends that are like, no, I think, you know, there's medicinal... I'm like, no, there isn't.” (37:39)
On the Consequences for Family:
- Ben: "You're supposed to love your family the way that Christ loves the church... The ego death is... totally self-centric. It serves you 100% right. But nobody else. ...And the relief that you got gave them actually less relief." (39:03)
- Anonymous Guest: "She at one point said, I was just waiting to figure out if I was gonna have to get a different husband. Like, I thought you were gonna die." (40:17)
Final Reflections on Obedience:
- "True peace is not found away from reality, but... is found in accepting the condition in which God has placed us. And that is essentially what led to true contentment." (41:06)
- “Obey with delight.” (50:18, Ben)

Key Timestamps

00:09 – Introduction to the episode; guest’s story of psychedelic use previewed.
08:31–14:12 – Guest details entry into microdosing, escalation, and spiritual rationalization.
16:03–23:38 – The central psychedelic "vision" experience and realization.
25:00–27:10 – Immediate spiritual aftermath, repentance, and quitting drugs.
31:23–34:19 – Deep dive into boundaries of demonic influence and the importance of consent.
36:23–41:06 – Contrasting worlds: counterfeit peace vs. the costly, real peace of Christ; consequences in family life.
49:44–51:29 – Reflections on obedience, wisdom, and the futility of shortcuts to spiritual growth.

Conclusion

This episode offers a raw, unvarnished testimony of psychedelic entrapment, self-deception, and spiritual confrontation, culminating in deliverance through Christ. The story is both cautionary and hopeful—underscoring that what masquerades as spiritual insight can be a "cheap counterfeit" seeking one’s ruin, but also that God’s faithfulness and grace can and will break through the deepest delusion.

Final advice from the guest:

“Don’t do cannabis." (44:55)

Key assurance from the hosts:

"He’ll move, literally move heaven and earth to save even the single lamb that goes astray.” (46:37, Ben)

For Listeners:

Whether you are wrestling with similar temptations or doubts, this episode acts both as a warning and a promise—of real spiritual danger, but also of the unsearchable faithfulness of God to deliver his own.

Haunted Cosmos Patreon: [Details provided in closing comments]
Relevant Past Episodes: “Psychedelics,” “Giants,” “Hat Man” (referenced by guest)

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Graveyard Shift: Psychedelic Demons