Podcast Summary: Help Wanted – "How to Instantly Build Trust in Any Conversation"

Podcast Information:

• Title: Help Wanted
• Host/Author: Money News Network
• Episode Title: How to Instantly Build Trust in Any Conversation
• Release Date: October 31, 2024
• Hosts: Jason Feifer (Entrepreneur Magazine Editor-in-Chief) and Nicole Lapin (Money Expert)

Introduction to Building Trust

In the October 31, 2024 episode of Help Wanted, hosts Jason Feifer and Nicole Lapin delve into effective strategies for establishing trust in both personal and professional conversations. The episode focuses on actionable techniques that listeners can implement immediately to enhance their interpersonal interactions and foster stronger relationships.

The Four Goals in Conversations

Nicole Lapin outlines four primary goals to achieve when engaging in any conversation:

1. Earn Their Trust
2. Show That You're Listening
3. Demonstrate Understanding
4. Remember What They Said

"When you talk with someone, you should have four goals... Remember what they said." [01:28]

Introducing the "Their Thoughts Plus One" Formula

Lapin introduces a transformative formula designed to deepen conversations and build trust:

Formula: Their Thoughts Plus One

This simple yet powerful strategy involves two key components:

1. Repeating or Reflecting Their Thoughts: Ensuring the other person feels heard and understood by restating their ideas.
2. Adding an Insightful Element: Enhancing the interaction by contributing a fresh perspective or question.

"It's really simple. Their thoughts plus one." [03:10]

Part 1: Repeating Their Thoughts

Lapin emphasizes the importance of actively listening and confirming understanding by repeating what the other person has said. She draws an analogy to restaurant servers who repeat orders to confirm accuracy and build trust.

"When somebody tells you something complex or interesting, why not give them that? You can reply with a version of... you restate their ideas or insights back to them." [04:00]

Notable Example: In consulting sessions, Lapin utilizes this technique to ensure she fully comprehends her clients' needs, thereby enhancing trust and the effectiveness of her advice.

"And they love this, because once they see that I understand their business so well... they are more likely to trust whatever I say next." [05:15]

Part 2: Adding Your Own Insights

Building upon the foundation of repetition, Lapin introduces the "Plus One" aspect—adding a unique insight or connection that enriches the conversation.

"What do I mean by plus one? I mean this. You repeat their thoughts and then you add a fresh insight." [06:20]

Approaches to Adding Insights:

1. Narrative Flourish: Enhancing their story with a compelling narrative.
2. Interesting Comparison: Drawing parallels to provide a new perspective.

Notable Conversations:

• With a CEO:
  Lapin recounts a conversation with a CEO who transformed a small, distrusted company into a larger, trusted entity. By reframing the CEO's story, she helped her see her achievements in a new light.

  "So, in other words, what you really did is you took over a small company... that's what I said to her." [07:45]

• With John Taffer:
  Discussing John Taffer's approach on his show Bar Rescue, Lapin connects his methods to leadership principles she learned from John Mackey of Whole Foods.

  "I'll just play the whole exchange. You functionally asked yourself... what does this situation need me to be. And that turned out to work." [09:04]

Benefits of the Formula

Lapin underscores that this method not only builds trust but also deepens the connection by making conversations more meaningful and memorable.

"Because their thoughts matter, and so do yours. And that comes from my newsletter." [09:50]

Conclusion and Practical Application

The episode wraps up by encouraging listeners to adopt the "Their Thoughts Plus One" formula in their daily interactions. By ensuring others feel heard and adding thoughtful insights, individuals can instantly build trust and strengthen their relationships.

"The power of their thoughts plus one. Because their thoughts matter, and so do yours." [10:00]

Key Takeaways:

• Active Listening: Essential for building trust.
• Repetition: Confirms understanding and makes others feel valued.
• Adding Insight: Enhances conversations and fosters deeper connections.
• Practical Application: Applicable in both personal and professional settings to improve communication and relationships.

Notable Quotes:

• "When you talk with someone, you should have four goals... Remember what they said." – Nicole Lapin [01:28]
• "It's really simple. Their thoughts plus one." – Nicole Lapin [03:10]
• "They are more likely to trust whatever I say next." – Nicole Lapin [05:15]
• "The power of their thoughts plus one. Because their thoughts matter, and so do yours." – Nicole Lapin [10:00]

By implementing these strategies, listeners can transform their conversational skills, leading to more trusting and productive interactions in all areas of their lives.