Mail Bag Episode " What if Nobody Wants to Work With Me? "

Summary

Podcast Summary: Help Wanted

Episode: Mail Bag Episode "What if Nobody Wants to Work With Me?"
Hosts: Jason Feifer & Nicole Lapin
Date: November 20, 2025

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Episode Overview

This mailbag episode of Help Wanted features host Jason Feifer answering three pressing listener questions about getting noticed, overcoming self-doubt after a career break, and making sense of conflicting advice. The conversation is candid, practical, and delivered with the characteristic empathy and humor the podcast is known for.

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Key Discussion Points and Insights

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1. How Do I Stand Out From the Noise? (Listener: Paul)

Segment Starts: [04:27]

• Paul's Dilemma: He wants to start a newsletter but worries about contributing to "noise" when people are already overwhelmed with emails.
• Jason’s Response:
  • Empathizes with the concern but reframes the issue:
    • “If you worry about being noise, you will never have a chance to be heard. That is true in every part of life.” [05:22]
  • Encourages not to let fear of adding to the noise keep you silent.
  • Asserts it's not the sender’s job to decide what’s “too much” for others—it's their choice to unsubscribe or engage.
  • Urges to focus on creating the one thing people value most, not avoid adding to the quantity.
  • Memorable Quote:
    • “Never hesitate to become somebody’s best option.” [07:03]
  • Draws a parallel with the podcast itself: quality and distinctiveness are what wins attention, even in crowded spaces.

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2. What if Nobody Wants to Work With Me? (Listener: Nicole)

Segment Starts: [07:28]

• Nicole’s Backstory:
  • Successful graphic designer who took a career break to raise children, now fears age (43) and shifting trends may make her undesirable to employers.
• Jason’s Advice:
  • Highlights that the question is framed around exclusion—who won’t want her—instead of possibilities.
  • Labels this negative framing as a “defense mechanism” that protects from rejection but stifles opportunity.
  • Encourages flipping the perspective: “Think about who would be excited to work with you, who needs access to your distinct skillset and experience.” [08:08]
  • Relays a story about Kara Goldin (Hint Water founder):
    • When told what wasn’t possible, she always asked, “What can we do?” and found ways forward from a place of possibility. [09:19]
  • Memorable Quote:
    • “Before ruling out what you can’t do, take seriously what you can do. I bet it’ll be a lot more than you think.” [10:02]
  • Adds a warm, personal note:
    • “By the way, I am 45, so you are not old or uncool at 43, I promise.” [10:13]

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3. Whose Advice is Worth Trusting? (Listener: Macy)

Segment Starts: [10:23]

• Macy’s Concern:
  • Overwhelmed by contradictory advice; wants to know when to follow or abandon others’ processes for building success.
• Jason’s Guidance:
  • Tells of a novelist who fields many hyper-specific, tactical questions—exposing people’s belief that mimicking someone’s habits leads to the same success.
  • Identifies this as the “illusion of simplicity”: people crave easy, concrete steps in the face of complexity.
  • Points out that different people succeed through opposite methods; there is no universal system.
  • Prescriptive Take:
    • “Adopt someone’s process when it helps you understand yourself better. Abandon it the moment it stops serving you.” [11:57]
    • Other people’s systems are just “starting points—not destinations.” Your life is your own.
  • Memorable Quote:
    • “You are building your life, not theirs.” [12:11]

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Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

| Timestamp | Quote | Speaker | |-------------|---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------|-------------------| | 05:22 | “If you worry about being noise, you will never have a chance to be heard. That is true in every part of life.” | Jason Feifer | | 07:03 | “Never hesitate to become somebody’s best option.” | Jason Feifer | | 08:08 | “Think about who would be excited to work with you, who needs access to your distinct skill set and experience.” | Jason Feifer | | 09:19 | “What can we do?” (Kara Goldin story) | Kara Goldin (via Jason) | | 10:02 | “Before ruling out what you can’t do, take seriously what you can do. I bet it’ll be a lot more than you think.” | Jason Feifer | | 10:13 | “By the way, I am 45, so you are not old or uncool at 43, I promise.” | Jason Feifer | | 11:57 | “Adopt someone’s process when it helps you understand yourself better. Abandon it the moment it stops serving you.” | Jason Feifer | | 12:11 | “You are building your life, not theirs.” | Jason Feifer |

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Timestamps for Key Sections

• [04:27] — Listener Question 1: Standing out from the noise (Paul)
• [07:28] — Listener Question 2: Self-doubt after a break (Nicole)
• [10:23] — Listener Question 3: Navigating conflicting advice (Macy)
• [12:23] — Weekly newsletter plug and outro

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Tone and Language

Throughout the episode, Jason uses an encouraging, conversational, and often humorous tone, blending hard-won professional insight with relatable anecdotes. The advice is practical yet empathetic, characterized by reframing negative self-talk and inviting listeners to consider new possibilities for themselves.

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Takeaways

• Stop self-rejecting: Don’t let fear of “adding to the noise” or being unwanted keep you from sharing your work or re-entering the workforce.
• Flip the script: Rather than dwelling on what might not work, ask: “What can I do? Who might value what I have?”
• Make advice work for you: Other people’s pathways are suggestions, not obligations. Use what clarifies your own needs and discard the rest.

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This episode serves as a blend of motivation and actionable wisdom for listeners at any stage of their career crossroads.

Transcript

[A]

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This is Help Wanted, the show that makes your work work for you. I'm Jason Pfeiffer, editor in chief of.

[A]

Entrepreneur magazine, and I'm money expert Nicole Lapin. On Tuesdays, Jason and I answer the helpline and help callers solve their work problems.

[B]

And on Thursdays, I give you one way to improve your work and build a career or company you love.

[A]

And it starts now.

[B]

I got an email recently from a guy named Paul. He reads my newsletter and he wanted to know this. He wrote, I Paul, I want to write a newsletter. But people are already inundated with newsletters and I don't want to add more clutter to their lives. So what should I do? And I wrote him back. And today I'm going to read to you what I wrote him, along with my answers to two letters, other questions. This is a mailbag edition of Help Wanted. I get a lot of questions from listeners, from readers, and every so often I sit down and I write a couple answers and distribute them in my newsletter and then read them right here on Help Wanted. And that's what I'm doing today. Because, you know, hey, it's the spirit of Help Wanted. This is what we do. And so today, here are the questions that I'M going to be addressing, number one, how do I stand out from the noise? That is Paul's question. Number two, what if nobody wants me? This is from someone who is re entering the workforce and very afraid that nobody will want to hire her. And then number three, whose advice is worth trusting? Which is interesting because if you listen to this podcast or any podcast, you are inundated with somebody like me and Nicole and whoever telling you things, telling you what we think you should do. Well, okay, whose advice is actually worth trusting? Is it mine? Am I worth trusting? I don't know. You can be the judge. But first, let's get back to Paul. Paul worries that he is going to add to the noise in people's lives. People already get too many newsletters. He doesn't want to write another newsletter. That's just going to be another thing that are just holding people back, back from getting on with their lives. So here's what I wrote. I wrote Paul. I get it. Nobody wants to be noise. But also, if you worry about being noise, you will never have a chance to be heard. That is true in every part of life. Do you not pitch your product because customers get too many pitches? Do you not apply for a job because the company got too many applicants? Do you not talk to the pretty woman at the party because other people did too? Truth be told, Paul, your concern sounds like a defense mechanism. When you stay silent, nobody can accuse you of being noisy. So here's a reframe. Instead of worrying about your own noise, start thinking of everything else as the noise that you can cut through. If you have something great, then you're doing people a favor by offering it to them. I mean, look, don't worry about whether they're inundated with too much stuff. They can make their own decisions about what is too much. If they want to unsubscribe to newsletters, then, you know, go for it. If they. That means they subscribe to too many of them. It is not your job to decide for them what too much is. That's actually kind of condescending when you think about it, to say, oh, well, I think people have too much, so I'm going to hold back so that they have less. They don't want less. They want you. Or rather, they might want you if you actually get out there and give what you have to them. If people are going to unsubscribe from a bunch of newsletters, then your job is to become the one newsletter that they hate. Keep. I think about that for everything I Think about that. For this podcast, for example, I know you probably have a lot of podcasts that are in your feed. You're trying to decide where to spend your time. I am not going to not make a podcast because of that. Instead, I am going to try to be the podcast that you listen to instead of the other ones. I want to make your life easy by producing quality so that when you find it, you don't have to go searching for it elsewhere. Because the thing is that people may be busy, Paul, but they will always make room for quality quality. So never hesitate to become somebody's best option. All right, that was the first question, and now we're going to move on to the second one. The second one is, what if nobody wants to work with me? And this comes from someone named Nicole. Nicole tells me this. I was a graphic designer and was pretty successful before taking a break to raise my four awesome kids. Now it's time for me to contribute to the family income again. But I am slightly old. That's 43 years old for the cool factor that many companies or agencies are looking for in a designer. So should I pivot to something else? All right, Nicole, I really appreciate the question. I know a lot of other people are going to relate to it, but I want you to step back and notice something. You framed your question in the negative. You are seeking out closed doors. You're identifying who won't take you seriously or who won't be excited about working with you. We do this to ourselves so often. It's like Paul's question just a moment ago. I see it as a defense mechanism. We want to protect ourselves, so we focus. Focus primarily on what to avoid. But what would it mean to flip that and instead to think about who would be excited to work with you, who needs access to your distinct skill set and experience? I'm reminded of a story that I love from Kara golden, the founder of Hint Water. In her company's early days, she wanted to increase her product's shelf life without adding preservatives. But no bottler could do it. Her husband and business partner told her this. He said, there is no way to get the taste you want and still have enough shelf life to distribute this product across the country. And Kara said this. What can we do? Think about that. Her husband was saying, what they can't do. And Kara's reply was, what can we do? Her husband said, they have one option. They can have a product with a very short shelf life and they can deliver it locally out of their Jeep. Perfect. Kara said. That's what we'll do. We'll find out what people think of the product and if it's worth trying to solve this problem. As the company grew, Kara kept asking that question. Someone would say what she can't do? And she would reply, what can we do? I encourage you to do something similar, Nicole, before ruling out what you can't do. Take seriously what you can do. I bet it'll be a lot more than you think. And by the way, I am 45, so you are not old or uncool at 43, I promise. All right, now here is the third and final question from today's Mailbag edition. Whose advice is worth trusting? This question came from someone named Macy. Macy wrote, I hear a lot of contradictory advice online. One influencer will lay out a strategy to be healthy or build a business, and another will say something wildly different. In your opinion, when is the best time to adopt or abandon someone else's process? Macy Before I answer that question, here is a relevant little story. I was once talking to a successful novelist who does a lot of book tours and he said that aspiring writers often attend his talks and then they ask him hyper specific tactical questions like what time do you start writing every day and how many words do you write per day and what kind of notebook do you use and what pen? And so on. They seem to think that these things are part of my success, the novelist told me, as if copying them is the key to their success. I think of this as the illusion of simplicity. People crave clarity and control in the face of uncertainty. Big goals, like writing a novel, are abstract and intimidating, but small behaviors like what pen do you use? Feel actionable and concrete. So that's what people gravitate toward. If the novelist says, I use a Moleskine notebook and I write a thousand words per day, then success feels graspable. It's like all you need to succeed is to do that. I think this explains so many things. It's why people buy books about habits and listen to modern gurus, podcasts and read articles about what billionaires eat for breakfast. We are looking for the easy answers to hard problems. But of course there is no single pathway to success. Two people can follow completely opposite processes and still achieve the same goals. Macy had asked me, when is the right time to adopt or abandon someone else's process, and my answer is adopt someone's process when it helps you understand yourself better. Abandon it the moment it stops serving you. Other people's systems are starting points, not destinations, because you are building your life, not theirs. Okay, those questions all actually came through my newsletter. My newsletter is called One Thing Better each week, One way to be more successful and satisfied and build a career or company that you love. It is a companion to Help one and I read it here on the podcast every Thursday. But if you want to get it early along with other great stuff that I send out, then just go to One Thing Better Email. That is a web address. Just plug it into a browser. One Thing Better Email and you will subscribe and then you will get my emails. And then if you hit reply, you can email me a question and it'll come right to my inbox. And maybe, just maybe, I will answer it on another edition of the mailbag. Help Wanted is a production of Money News Network. Help Wanted is hosted by me, Jason.

[A]

Pfeiffer and me, Nicole Lapin. Our executive producer is Morgan Lavoy. Do you want some help? Email our [e-mail] for the chance to have some of your questions answered on the show. And follow us on Instagram at Money News and Tik TokoneyNewsNetwork for exclusive content and to see our beautiful faces. Maybe a little dance?

[B]

Oh, I didn't sign up for that.

[A]

All right, well, talk to you soon.