The Secret to Living Without Regrets

Summary

Podcast Summary: Help Wanted – "The Secret to Living Without Regrets"

Introduction

In the October 17, 2024 episode of Help Wanted, hosted by Jason Feifer, Editor-in-Chief of Entrepreneur Magazine, and money expert Nicole Lapin, the discussion centers around living a life free from regrets by embracing opportunities and stepping outside one’s comfort zone. This episode delves into practical strategies for personal and professional growth, drawing from Jason’s personal experiences and insights.

Main Discussion

1. The Comfort Zone Trap

Jason opens the episode by addressing a common workplace and life dilemma: the reluctance to take risks due to the comfort zone. He states, “You are not taking the risks that you should” (00:30). Jason emphasizes that while comfort zones provide security, they can also hinder personal and professional development by preventing individuals from exploring new opportunities.

2. Personal Journey and Revelation

To illustrate his point, Jason shares his personal journey from working as a small-town newspaper reporter to moving to New York at age 28. He recounts the fear and uncertainty he felt during this transition: “I arrived full of dreams and ambitions, eager to do the things that I hadn't. But I... didn’t know many people, which meant going out meant going out alone” (03:15). This pivotal move marked the beginning of significant changes in his life, pushing him out of his comfort zone and into new experiences.

3. The Future Self Technique

A key takeaway from the episode is Jason’s unique strategy for overcoming the fear of stepping into the unknown: imagining one’s future self. He explains, “I ask my future self. It sounds weird, but it is easy, helpful and it drives results” (01:20). By visualizing a future version of oneself, individuals can evaluate their current decisions based on potential future satisfaction or regret. Jason elaborates on this technique, revealing how it helped him make pivotal life choices that he now values deeply.

4. Three Zones Framework

Expanding on the concept of comfort zones, Jason introduces the “Three Zones Framework” to better understand and categorize experiences:

• Comfort Zone: The baseline where individuals feel safe and unchallenged.
• Curiosity Zone: The area beyond comfort where new and potentially rewarding experiences lie.
• Hard Pass Zone: Activities or opportunities that hold no genuine interest or value.

He illustrates this with, “Imagine like three concentric circles. And in the middle is comfort zone... the circle outside of that is your curiosity zone... and then the circle outside of that is your hard pass zone” (05:30). This model encourages individuals to venture into their curiosity zones, where growth and fulfillment await, rather than remaining stagnant or dismissing new opportunities outright.

5. Practical Application and Benefits

Jason shares how this approach has positively impacted his life, allowing him to engage in diverse projects, take significant career risks, and accumulate invaluable experiences. He advises listeners to be “kind to your future self” by making decisions that their future selves would thank them for, thereby minimizing regrets. As he puts it, “Tomorrow's regrets are erased today” (06:10).

6. Encouragement and Call to Action

Concluding his segment, Jason encourages listeners to implement the future self technique in their daily decision-making processes. He emphasizes the importance of acting now to seize opportunities that align with one's long-term aspirations: “Do it today. Your future self will thank you” (07:30).

Notable Quotes

• “You are not taking the risks that you should.” – Jason Feifer (00:30)
• “I ask my future self. It sounds weird, but it is easy, helpful and it drives results.” – Jason Feifer (01:20)
• “Tomorrow's regrets are erased today.” – Jason Feifer (06:10)
• “Do it today. Your future self will thank you.” – Jason Feifer (07:30)

Conclusion

In this episode of Help Wanted, Jason Feifer provides a compelling guide to living without regrets by challenging the conventional notion of comfort zones. Through personal anecdotes and practical frameworks, he empowers listeners to embrace curiosity, take calculated risks, and make decisions that foster long-term satisfaction and growth. This insightful discussion serves as a valuable resource for anyone looking to enhance their career and personal life by overcoming fear and seizing opportunities.

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Timestamps

• 00:30 – Introduction to the main theme: taking risks beyond the comfort zone.
• 01:20 – Introduction of the future self technique.
• 03:15 – Jason’s personal journey from Massachusetts to New York.
• 05:30 – Explanation of the Three Zones Framework.
• 06:10 – Benefits of minimizing future regrets.
• 07:30 – Call to action: Encouragement to implement the discussed strategies.

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Help Wanted is a production of Money News Network, offering listeners actionable advice to resolve workplace challenges and build fulfilling careers or businesses. For more insights, subscribe to Jason Feifer’s newsletter, "One Thing Better each Week."

Transcript

[A]

This is Help Wanted, the show that makes your work work for you. I'm Jason Pfeiffer, Editor in chief of.

[B]

Entrepreneur Magazine, and I'm money expert Nicole Lapin. On Tuesdays, Jason and I answer the helpline and help callers solve their work problems.

[A]

And on Thursdays, I give you one way to improve your work and build a career or company you love.

[B]

And it starts now.

[A]

You are not taking the risks that you should. I don't mean to scold you here, but you know it's true, right? You're an open minded person, but your comfort zone can also be a trap. It is so easy to just stick with what you know. Why make yourself uncomfortable? But as a result, you miss out on a lot. Or at least you feel like you're missing out on a lot. Today, I am not going to scream YOLO and FOMO at you. That is unhelpful. Instead, I'm going to give you the trick that I have used to propel myself into the unknown. And that you can use too. Here it is. I ask my future self. It sounds weird, but it is easy, helpful and it drives results. And to understand why it works, to ask your future self, let me first tell you about my past self. So here's when new things were scary. I spent Most of my 20s living with my college girlfriend and working as a small town newspaper reporter in Massachusetts. It was fine, but it was also repetitive. Same people, same activities, same experiences. In 2008, at the age of 28. So now you can figure out how old I am. In 2008, at the age of 28, everything changed. My girlfriend and I broke up, I got a job at Men's Health and I moved to New York. I arrived full of dreams and ambitions, eager to do the things that I hadn't. But I that was scary. You know, it was scary. I didn't know many people, which meant going out meant going out alone. I did meet some people like me, and honestly, they spent a lot of time at home watching tv. That seemed easy and tempting to just retreat into a quiet life firmly inside a comfort zone. But then I had a revelation that changed everything. I imagined my future self. I pictured myself in a future stage of life, married, with kids, full of responsibilities and limitations. Then I imagined that guy looking back on his 20s when life was simple and unrestrained. And that guy, that older guy, that future self. He could think one of two things. He could either think regret. Why didn't I do more in my 20s when I still could? Or he could think Satisfaction. I'm so glad I did all of that. That helped me realize something. Just thinking about that. What it helped me realize was you don't actually live just for today. Your decisions contribute to a whole life. Fulfilling the dreams of the person you were challenging and growing the person that you are and nourishing the person you will become. Tomorrow's regrets are erased today. So back then, back at the age of 28, I made a decision. I will do something every night. Sometimes it'll be an adventure. Sometimes it'll be just meeting someone for dinner. But I will not go home until an experience is had. Monday to Sunday. This is not correct for everyone, of course, but it was correct for me. I did amazing things and dumb things and weird things. I kept it up while dating and then after getting married, when my wife would often join me, me and I kept going until we had kids at the age of 35. Now I am 44. I am the guy that I imagined back at age 28, with more responsibilities and less free time. And I am deeply grateful for that younger version of myself who anticipated my life. No, who anticipated our combined life and gave me the gift of experience. Today, when I am deciding whether to do something, I still ask myself, would my future self regret missing this experience? It has helped me join big projects and take big risks with my career and go places I might not have otherwise gone. Try it yourself. In fact, here is why I think it's so powerful. It's because the comfort zone as we know it. In fact, I even used the phrase the comfort zone earlier in this episode. The comfort zone is a myth. It's not real. People talk a lot about the comfort zone, but that's not a helpful framing because it sets experiences up as binary. There's either comfort or there's discomfort. Life does not work like that. Experiences are more of a gradient. In fact, here's a better way to think of it. Imagine like three concentric circles. And in the middle is comfort zone, right? That's your comfort zone. But then the circle outside of that is your curiosity zone. And then the circle outside of that. At the border of the edge, there is hard pass zone, comfort zone, curiosity zone, hard pass zone. Your comfort zone is where you start, you know, Your curiosity zone is where you would go if only you had the courage or energy. It might be great or terrible, but doing it would just satisfy you because then you would know what happens because you're curious. And then there's your hard pass zone. That is what you are genuinely not interested in. Eh? These will be different for everyone. Of course they'll be different for everyone, and that's fine. I cannot say I should not say what belongs in your zones, but you can, you know what you're deep down curious about. Out of fear, you might try to dismiss those things and you might say, oh, that's silly or not worth trying. But come on. Today's curiosity can become tomorrow's longing. When you imagine your future self's satisfactions or regrets, you get a fresh perspective. You can start to see how important a decision really is. Is this thing worth passing on that's in front of you right now, or is it worth following your curiosity? Is it worth pushing yourself out of the comfort zone and into the curiosity zone? Here's what I say. I say be kind to your future self. You want to experience this right now, just truly here? Stop for a moment and remember yourself 10 years ago. What did you not do that you now regret? I'm sure there is something. What did you avoid because of fear or nervousness? Don't you wish that you could go back and do it? Well, you can't. But now imagine yourself 10 years into the future, a future you 10 years from now. Imagine the regret that that version of you would have about you not doing something today. And now realize, well, you actually can go back and do it in this circumstance because the opportunity still exists. It's in front of you right now. All you have to do is use the time you have. And that comes from my newsletter. My newsletter is called One Thing Better each Week, One way to be more successful and satisfied and build a career or company that you love. It is a companion to Help Wanted. I always read them here on Help Wanted, but if you want to get them a few weeks early in your inbox along with a bunch of other goodies that I send out, then go ahead and subscribe. You can find it at onethingbetter email. That is a web address, so just plug it into a browser. One thingbetter Email. Do it today. Your future self will thank you. Help Wanted is a production of Money News Network. Help Wanted is hosted by me, Jason.

[B]

Pfeiffer and me, Nicole Lapin. Our executive producer is Morgan Lavoy. Do you want some help? Email our helpline at HelpWantedOneNewsNetwork for the chance to have some of your questions answered on the show and follow us on Instagram @moneynews and TikTok @moneynewsnetwork for exclusive content and to see our beautiful faces. Maybe a little dance Oh, I didn't.

[A]

Sign up for that.

[B]

All right, well, talk to you soon.