HerMoney with Jean Chatzky — Mailbag with Beth Pinsker: RMDs, Medical Bills, and Family Loans Episode Date: November 21, 2025
Episode Overview
In this special mailbag episode, Jean Chatzky is joined by Beth Pinsker (financial journalist, CFP®, and author of My Mother's Money) to tackle real-life financial questions from listeners. This time, queries focus on three complex topics many women face: loaning money to aging parents, handling medical bills after a loved one's passing, and making smart Required Minimum Distributions (RMD) decisions in retirement. With clear, actionable advice and plenty of compassion, Jean and Beth navigate the intricacies of intergenerational support, estate considerations, and preserving financial security.
Key Discussion Points & Insights
1. Should You Formalize a Loan to Family for Senior Home Repairs?
(03:08–06:29)
Listener Scenario:
Denise is considering loaning money to her husband's elderly mother for home repairs to allow her to age in place. The plan is to be repaid when the condo sells, but the family wonders if a legal agreement or just a county lien is necessary.
Beth’s Advice:
- The situation has “too many ifs and too many conditions placed on this loan of money…” (05:01, Beth)
- With family, things often get complicated, especially if there are multiple heirs.
- “If you want to help your mother-in-law out, help your mother-in-law out, if there are no others involved. If there’s another child, things get complicated.” (05:08, Beth)
- If expecting formal repayment, a written agreement with a lawyer is essential.
- A gift might simplify things if affordable, especially if inheritance would flow to just the one child.
Jean’s Additions:
- Reverse mortgages aren’t ideal but are “precisely who reverse mortgages were made for… might simplify the situation because she would be the one borrowing from her own home.” (06:29, Jean)
- If proceeding with a loan:
- Get a proper written agreement.
- IRS requires interest on family loans to avoid it being seen as a gift.
- File a lien with help from a real estate lawyer.
Notable Quote:
“With family, you know, if you want to help, help and just make a gift perhaps.” — Beth Pinsker, 05:19
2. Who Pays the Medical Bills After a Loved One Dies?
(06:34–15:01)
Listener Scenario:
A listener's elderly relative passed away after prolonged hospital care. The surviving spouse is receiving Medicare Advantage claim denials but is unsure who’s responsible for any bills, especially since there are no significant assets left behind.
Beth’s Guidance:
- Liability is not directly on the surviving spouse but on the deceased's estate:
- “They wouldn’t be coming after the surviving spouse per se. They’d be coming after the estate of the deceased. And they’d be limited by the maximum out-of-pocket on the Medicare Advantage plan.” (10:27, Beth)
- Maximum exposure is federally capped (over $9,300 for Medicare Advantage in 2025).
- If all assets pass directly to the spouse (joint assets, beneficiaries), there might be no estate for bills to attach to.
Jean’s Clarification:
- If assets pass by beneficiary (e.g., IRA, joint accounts), “that’s not part of an estate that would be probated.” (12:44, Jean)
- Suggests getting a “medical billing advocate” to review charges and communications.
Beth’s Tips on Medical Billing Advocates:
- “You can find one in your area… go to an insurance broker… social service type agencies like the National Council on Aging or AARP... There’s an organization called Boomer Benefits.” (12:52, Beth)
- Attorneys handling probate or trusts can also help.
Personal Story:
Beth recounts her own experience with her mother’s estate, where a hospital initially billed $10,000 but this was later corrected as a mix-up. “By the time we sorted it all out, it was zero.” (14:22, Beth)
Notable Quote:
“Work with the hospital billing system to see if those bills are really legit first, and then deal with what you’re liable for in terms of an estate.” — Beth Pinsker, 14:43
3. Smart Options for Required Minimum Distributions in Retirement
(18:51–22:18)
Listener Scenario:
Anna, 75, is facing an $11,000 RMD from her IRA, doesn’t need the cash for expenses, and wants suggestions to preserve or grow it for future long-term care or assisted living. She’s not interested in charitable donations (QCDs).
Beth’s Recommendations:
- This is more of an investment allocation issue:
- “The amount’s not going to change no matter what she does... Anything that earns interest is better than doing nothing with it.” (18:51, Beth)
- Many people leave RMDs uninvested—bad idea due to inflation.
- Anna’s options:
- Bolster high-yield savings or CD ladder—CD rates are declining so now might be a good time to lock in longer terms.
- Consider a TIPS (Treasury Inflation-Protected Securities) ladder if worried about inflation: “A TIPS ladder will help you with inflation. You could even ... put it on the back end of your CD ladder. Keeps things simple.” (21:07, Beth)
- Keep accounts consolidated to avoid mental clutter.
Notable Quote:
“At 75, there’s no need to be risky. This person has assets and just needs a place to sort of stash this money.” — Beth Pinsker, 19:38
Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments
- “With family, if you want to help, help and just make a gift perhaps.” (05:19, Beth)
- “Reverse mortgages are precisely who reverse mortgages were made for...” (06:29, Jean)
- “They wouldn’t be coming after the surviving spouse per se. They’d be coming after the estate of the deceased.” (10:27, Beth)
- “Anything that earns interest is better than doing nothing with it.” (18:57, Beth)
- “The important part... is you want to know it's there, you want to know it's growing, and that's what's important rather than really maximizing every cent.” (21:14, Beth)
Key Timestamps
- 03:08 — Loaning Money for Home Repairs: Risks & Best Practices
- 06:29 — Reverse Mortgages, Written Agreements, Liens
- 10:27 — Medical Bills After Death: Who Owes What?
- 12:52 — Finding and Using a Medical Billing Advocate
- 18:51 — RMD Investment and Savings Strategies
- 21:07 — Using TIPS and CD Ladders for Inflation Protection
Episode Resources & Further Reading
- Beth Pinsker’s book: My Mother’s Money
- BethPinsker.com | Beth on MarketWatch and Social Media
- Info on medical billing advocates: National Council on Aging, AARP, Boomer Benefits
- General info: HerMoney Newsletter
Closing
Jean thanks Beth for her thoughtful, practical answers and reminds listeners that women face unique financial challenges, especially around caregiving, estate matters, and retirement planning. For ongoing help, listeners are encouraged to check out HerMoney’s signature programs and resources.