#331: There Goes My Isaac Streak w/ Colin Mochrie

Summary

Podcast Summary: Hey Riddle Riddle #331 – "There Goes My Isaac Streak" featuring Colin Mochrie

Episode Overview In episode #331 of Hey Riddle Riddle, released on November 20, 2024, hosts Aaron Keenan, John Patrick Coan (JPC), and Adel Rifai invite the legendary improviser Colin Mochrie to explore the intriguing intersection of riddles, improv, and personal anecdotes. Titled "There Goes My Isaac Streak," the episode delves into Colin's illustrious career, his relationship with riddles, and features engaging riddle-solving segments interspersed with spontaneous improv scenes.

---

Welcome and Introduction (00:02 - 03:02)

The episode kicks off with the hosts introducing their feed of humorous banter surrounding a McDonald's meal deal, setting a lighthearted tone. The conversation quickly shifts when Adel announces the special guest:

• Adel Rifai [02:24]: "I just brought improv legend Colin Mochrie. I don't know if that's okay if he's here or like, should I tell him to go away?"

The hosts warmly welcome Colin, highlighting his significant contributions to the world of improv:

• Aaron Keenan [03:02]: "This is an extraordinary honor that you are joining us on improv podcast."

Colin reflects on his exposure to improv, crediting Whose Line is it Anyway? as his gateway into the art form:

• Colin Mochrie [03:20]: "Whose Line was it did sort of bring improv into the mainstream and at least gave people an introduction of what it was."

---

Colin Mochrie’s Journey and Impact (03:02 - 07:05)

The discussion delves deeper into Colin's background, his time with Second City Toronto, and his role in inspiring new generations of improvisers. JPC shares a personal anecdote about a fan who began taking improv classes after listening to their show, emphasizing the "circle paying itself forward."

• JPC [03:53]: "...this is like, that's the circle paying itself forward."

Colin expresses gratitude for being part of a legacy that has made improv accessible and enjoyable for many:

• Colin Mochrie [04:22]: "It's pretty cool... I'm glad that Whose Line kind of has that push."

The hosts acknowledge Colin's influence, blending appreciation with their characteristic humor about being "overrated improvisers."

---

Riddles and Personal Preferences (07:05 - 14:36)

Transitioning from personal stories, the hosts explore Colin's relationship with riddles and puzzles. Interestingly, while hype-riddled at the beginning, Colin reveals a complex stance towards riddles:

• JPC [07:24]: "What is your relationship with riddles? Riddles, puzzles, lateral thinking problems. Do you like them?"

• Colin Mochrie [07:43]: "I do like cryptic crosswords."

Despite some initial disdain, Colin acknowledges the occasional engagement with riddles through his tours and interactions with fellow improvisers.

The segment introduces the first riddle submitted by Neil, framed as an Irish riddle but more of a narrative joke. The riddle involves a couple throwing a dog out of a train, leading to humorous and somewhat gruesome guesswork from the hosts and Colin.

• Neil’s Riddle [10:00]:

  "There was this Old couple sitting on a train... What did they see coming after the train but the wife's dog? And what did the dog have sticking out of its mouth?"

After multiple humorous attempts and improv interjections, the answer is revealed:

• Answer [15:10]: The dog's tongue.

• JPC [14:28]: "The tongue."

This segment highlights the blend of riddle-solving and improv, keeping listeners engaged through laughter and creative thinking.

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Interaction with Listener Riddles and Improv Scenes (14:36 - 29:59)

The episode continues with more riddles from listeners like Christine and Isaac. For each riddle, the hosts and Colin engage in lively discussions, attempts to solve, and improv scenes that add humor and spontaneity.

Christine’s Riddle [19:18]:

“Do you know how when geese fly in a V formation, one side of the V is usually longer than the other side of the V. Why is that?”

• Colin Mochrie [19:58]: "I got the gist of this now. I got it. I had this whole thing that it was sort of like testicles, where one is lower than the other always."

Eventually, the straightforward answer surfaces:

• Answer [20:02]: There's one less goose on one side, leading to an imbalance in the V formation.

The hosts incorporate improv sketches related to the riddles, such as acting out geese arguing over leadership positions in their V formation, adding an entertaining layer to the problem-solving process.

---

Isaac’s Traditional Riddle and Final Riddle Segment (24:45 - 29:59)

Isaac's submission presents a more traditional riddle, prompting deeper analysis and discussion:

Isaac’s Riddle [25:43]:

“Hands she has, but does not hold. Teeth she has, but does not bite. Feet she has, but they are cold. Eyes she has, but without sight. Who is she?”

After various guesses like "clock," "Venus de Milo," and eventually the correct answer:

• Answer [34:30]: A doll, specifically a Barbie.

The hosts celebrate successful guesses and continue to engage with the audience through riddles, seamlessly blending intellectual challenge with comedic flair.

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Conclusion and Closing Thoughts (29:59 - 34:00)

As the riddle segments wind down, the hosts reflect on the challenges and joys of incorporating riddles into their improv-centric podcast. They appreciate Colin's sharp wit and ability to navigate both riddles and spontaneous comedy seamlessly.

• Colin Mochrie [34:08]: "It's pretty cool... I'll never have another riddle anywhere near me."

The episode wraps up with a sense of camaraderie and mutual respect among the hosts and guest, celebrating both the art of improvisation and the playful spirit of riddling.

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Notable Quotes

• Aaron Keenan [03:14]: "I'm sure the circle paying itself forward. Because I wouldn't have gotten into it without you doing Whose End Is It Anyway?"

• Colin Mochrie [04:22]: "It's pretty cool... Whose Line kinda has that push."

• JPC [12:53]: "The answer here is very like divorce papers. You don't have to think too hard about it."

• Colin Mochrie [24:57]: "Hands, teeth, feet, and eyes... She's my grandmother."

• Colin Mochrie [34:16]: "Christmas ham. Nothing better going through the mail than a Christmas ham."

These quotes encapsulate the episode's blend of humor, camaraderie, and the playful struggle with riddles.

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Final Thoughts

Episode #331 of Hey Riddle Riddle masterfully intertwines the worlds of riddling and improvisational comedy, especially with the inclusion of Colin Mochrie. Listeners are treated to a mix of thoughtful problem-solving, hilarious improvisation, and genuine appreciation for the art forms that make the podcast both entertaining and intellectually stimulating. Whether you're a fan of improv, riddles, or both, this episode offers a delightful journey through the playful challenges that keep the Clue Crew and their esteemed guest laughing and thinking alike.

Transcript

[Aaron Keenan]

This is a headgum podcast.

[JPC]

With the five dollar meal deal at McDonald's. You pick a McDouble, or a McChicken, then get a small fry, a small.

[Colin Mochrie]

Drink and a four piece McNuggets. That's a lot of McDonald's for not.

[JPC]

A lot of money. Price and participation may vary. For a limited time only, the doctor was the mother. He stood on a block of ice. Both of them were goldfish. It was the cabin of an airpl. Everyone gather around the table. Gather around the table. I have prepared a meal. It is in kind of the trappings of my culture.

[Adel]

And this is Indiana culture or this is Indiana culture.

[JPC]

Yes, we still have some. We have a little. We have some. We have some there.

[Aaron Keenan]

I'm saying this lovingly. There is a live turkey on this table.

[JPC]

Yes, I.

[Aaron Keenan]

What's the plan?

[JPC]

Well, that one I couldn't get off. I think the rest of my cooking has kind of attracted it. So we'll be sharing dinner tonight with that. But we are eating all of the trappings and the bounties of the turkey.

[Aaron Keenan]

Oh, thank God. We're not.

[JPC]

No, we're not gonna eat the live turkey. If it gets any bigger, it could be a problem. No, we are going to be eating race car and soybean.

[Adel]

Yes, Race car. Big in Indiana. Indiana grows a lot of soy.

[Aaron Keenan]

Yes, we grow David Letterman.

[Adel]

David Letterman went to Ball State. Yes, of course. Reggie Miller.

[JPC]

John Cougar Mellencamp is.

[Aaron Keenan]

Kurt Vonnegut was born there.

[Adel]

Dreach of mail camp has a museum there. And in the museum there's a letter from his dad. He never read or opened.

[JPC]

I didn't make anything. I didn't make any dinner. I'm sorry. I forgot. I forgot. I invited you guys over and I didn't make any dinner.

[Aaron Keenan]

Live turkey.

[Adel]

I brought Colin Mochrie. But what else do we have here?

[Aaron Keenan]

Wait, what?

[JPC]

What you say? What?

[Adel]

Oh, sorry. I just brought improv legend Colin Mochrie. I don't know if that's. Is that okay if he's here or like, should I tell him to go away?

[Aaron Keenan]

Or Adel, I didn't dress for the occasion.

[JPC]

We should ask improv legend. Is that a term, a title that you endorse? You're like, yeah, improv legend, that should be my title.

[Adel]

Normally, no, but I'd say there's two or three people who deserve that title. And I'd say he's on that Mount Rushmore. Mount Rushmore has two or three faces, right? Colin, please. Who could remember? Say, hi, this is jpc. And Aaron.

[Colin Mochrie]

Hi. I don't like to use too much of my improv legend voice. I tend to just be.

[Adel]

Of course, of course.

[Colin Mochrie]

Enjoy, enjoy. Thank you for having me.

[Adel]

Thanks for doing this, Khalid.

[Aaron Keenan]

This is absolutely surreal. I think a lot of the people on the Zoom are kind of here because of you. So this is an extraordinary honor that you are joining us on improv podcast.

[Colin Mochrie]

I'm sure all of you in the womb as your parents were watching Whose Line? The first incarnation.

[Aaron Keenan]

Grandparents. Yes. But.

[Adel]

Yes.

[Colin Mochrie]

Oh, geez, Aaron.

[JPC]

Well, I mean, yeah. I mean, not. Not too far off, because like I said, I grew up in Indiana, and believe it or not, Indiana does not have access to a lot of improv. So I cut my teeth watching Whose Land Is It Anyway? Episodes, and that's really what was my gateway drug to get into improv when I got into high school. So what's cool, Colin? We've all now been performing improv for decades on our own, but I did a show.

[Colin Mochrie]

Decades, sure.

[JPC]

Yeah. I did a show this weekend, and someone came up to me from the show, and they were very nice, and they listened to our show, and they said that they started taking improv classes based on hearing our show and hearing people have fun doing improv. And I thought that was very cool. And then I thought about it when you were coming on as a guest, and I was like, wow, this is like, that's the circle paying itself forward. Because I wouldn't have gotten into it without you doing Whose End Is It Anyway?

[Colin Mochrie]

It's pretty cool. I mean, one of the things I loved most about Whose Line Was it did sort of bring improv into the mainstream and at least gave people an introduction of what it was. So, yeah, it's nice. It's lovely when people come up and say, oh, yeah, you know, I watched you since I was born, and thank you for inspiring me. And there's some people. It's like, there's no way I'm older than you. You're lying. But it's. It is nice. And I'm glad that. Whose Line kind of has that. Kind of had that push.

[Aaron Keenan]

What was your.

[Colin Mochrie]

And thank you for keeping it going.

[JPC]

Yeah.

[Aaron Keenan]

What was your exposure to improv when you were young?

[Colin Mochrie]

I was born in the last century, so there really was no improv there. Truly.

[JPC]

Yeah.

[Colin Mochrie]

Was no improv. Jonathan Winters was the only sort of practitioner, and then Robin Williams came along. But up to then, there really was nothing. And it wasn't till I saw a demonstration of theater sports in Vancouver when I was in theater school. Where I first saw improv and thought, oh, this looks like something it'd be fun to do in the weekends.

[Adel]

Which is Viola Spolens son. I forget his name. Is that right? There's a Canadian guy who started the comedy.

[Aaron Keenan]

Yeah. What is.

[Colin Mochrie]

The guy who started theater sports was actually a British guy in Calgary.

[Adel]

Oh.

[Colin Mochrie]

Named Keith Johnstone.

[Adel]

Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, that's right.

[Colin Mochrie]

So he. Yeah. So it was improv in sort of a sporting venue. And I thought, yeah, this is something. Never thinking, well, this will be my career. Because it was. It wasn't a career at that point. No. Nobody ever said, I'm going to be an improviser when I grow up.

[Adel]

Yeah, it was something to do on the couch next to Carson.

[Colin Mochrie]

Exactly, exactly.

[Adel]

Did you ever do Second City Toronto or anything like that?

[Colin Mochrie]

I was, I was at Second City Toronto. Ryan Stiles and I grew up in Vancouver and he had been hired for Second City for the. When Expo 86 was in Vancouver. And so because they liked him, they brought him back to do main stage on bank in Toronto. And I moved out a little while later and he called up and said, hey, there's someone. They need someone for the touring company should come audition. So I did. So I got that and then the, the person who directed me became my wife.

[JPC]

So it was a.

[Colin Mochrie]

It was just a full round life thing. Second City.

[Adel]

Yeah. That's incredible.

[Colin Mochrie]

Tough audition. Tough audition for your wife or. Oh, yeah, it was a whole dishwashing thing that I thought.

[JPC]

Well, you know, we all three of us feel very grateful for the work that you have done exposing people to improv. And now we feel what's the opposite of grateful? Because we have to expose you to a bunch of riddles. But that is kind of what we have to do.

[Adel]

We don't really feel shame. Shame.

[JPC]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Colin Mochrie]

You know what? Just be grateful and just be committed to that because nobody knows, nobody has to know what you're really feeling.

[JPC]

Well, okay, I guess that's true. And it leads me into my next question. What is your relationship with riddles? Riddles, puzzles, lateral thinking problems. Do you like them?

[Aaron Keenan]

He's like, I hate them.

[JPC]

Yeah.

[Colin Mochrie]

No, no. Okay, this, I'm pretty sure this is not a thing from your time on Earth. There was this series of books called Encyclopedia Brown.

[JPC]

Yes.

[Adel]

Oh, yeah.

[Colin Mochrie]

Teenage Detective. So that was kind of. There was that kind of riddle where you had to figure out, oh, no, penguins don't live in the Antarctic. That's why he stole lunch money or whatever the crime was. But yeah, every once in A while someone would come up with, well, if they saw the sawdust, he'd still be alive. And you go, what? And then. So they kind of obsessed me for maybe two months of my life, and then I forgot about it.

[Adel]

You know, lived, and now we're here.

[Colin Mochrie]

Drank, and then, yeah, it all worked out. Once you have sex, riddles really come in last.

[Adel]

One day, Colin. One day, this podcast will bring along our wives, hopefully.

[Aaron Keenan]

Here's hoping.

[Colin Mochrie]

You never know. That's the beauty. Improv nerds, man, they go for it.

[Adel]

Have you ever, Colin, have you ever done an escape room before?

[Colin Mochrie]

No. Okay, again, I've had sex in.

[Aaron Keenan]

That makes sense.

[Colin Mochrie]

It is one of those things I do. There's a show called Taskmaster. Do you know it?

[Aaron Keenan]

Yes, it's one of my faves.

[Colin Mochrie]

Yeah, exactly. And so for me, that's my kind of riddle thing where I. I hear what the task is and my mind goes, how would I get out of doing this the way they think I would and still fulfill what the challenge is, of course.

[Aaron Keenan]

Oh, man, I would love to see you on that show. I feel like your level of mischief would fit very well in the tone.

[Colin Mochrie]

I would feel a little intimidated because both Canadians that have been on it. Juan went all the way. Oh, May Martin. And the other one.

[JPC]

Yeah, we remember the first. We always remember the first and then the second.

[Adel]

Yeah.

[Colin Mochrie]

So, yeah, I would love to. Yeah. So I do love riddles. I do like cryptic crosswords. The guy I tour with, Brad Sherwood, he is a major dick. I guess he just constantly throwing riddles and.

[JPC]

Yeah, okay. Well, you know, we have some riddles today. I think some of them.

[Colin Mochrie]

Okay.

[JPC]

Some of them. I think it's impossible to say, like, what the difficulty of these are, and I actually won't say what the difficulty of these are because that sets everybody up to fail. But we're just going to start with this one. And this one is a riddle submitted from Neil, and Neil says this is an Irish riddle. And by that, I think Neil says that he. It doesn't specifically have anything to do with Ireland, but he got it from a book of Irish stories, folklore, and riddles that he had as a kid, and this is the only one that he remembers. So here's the riddle. It's got a little bit of a story element to it.

[Colin Mochrie]

And again, I'm just saying, that was probably one of the worst Christmas presents he ever got.

[JPC]

Yeah. It's a book of Irish riddles, and I have to take it back to the library. What? Why? So there was this Old couple sitting on a train, a man smoking a pipe and reading a newspaper, and his wife with a small dog in her lap, petting it and talking to it and feeding it little treats. As the journey went on, the train carriage started filling up with smoke from the man's pipe. Eventually, the wife got up, grabbed the pipe from her husband's mouth and yelled, I'm sick of you and your damned pipe. And threw the pipe out the train window. The husband angrily turned to his wife, yelled, I'm sick of you and your damn dog. Grabbed the dog from his wife's hands and threw it out of the window. Eventually, the train reached its destination, and the couple got out and walked to the end of the train. And what did they see coming after the train but the wife's dog? And what did the dog have sticking out of its mouth? And that's. That's the riddle.

[Colin Mochrie]

A tumor. From smoking the pipe.

[Aaron Keenan]

And it's not psa.

[Adel]

It's not the pipe?

[Colin Mochrie]

No. It seems too obvious.

[JPC]

Yeah.

[Aaron Keenan]

Yeah.

[Adel]

Is it like a chunk of the wood that he clung to when he was thrown out or something? Like, was it. I don't know, the height at which he was thrown?

[Colin Mochrie]

I'm just having an image of a dog clinging to something, just all teeth.

[JPC]

Grabbing the back of the train. Dead rabbit at all. I love that. I think it's a little more visceral. This is more just like a silly children story.

[Aaron Keenan]

Well, we don't know. Irish humor thing.

[Adel]

I'm so sorry. When the man takes a woman's dog and violently whips it out of a train window. You're right. I'm being. I'm being grotesque.

[JPC]

I'm saying I don't think we want to. We don't want to emphasize the part about the dog thrown out of the train window because that the dog's still alive because the dog's running up to the train. So the dog is still alive.

[Colin Mochrie]

That would make sense.

[Adel]

Okay.

[Colin Mochrie]

If he ran up to.

[Aaron Keenan]

Yeah, it is. The. The treat is still in its mouth from when she was feeding him treats earlier.

[JPC]

Aaron, that is a really great guess. And I love that you paid attention to the first line of the riddle when you said that the dog was eating treats. It's not a treat that was hanging out with the dog's mouth.

[Adel]

Is it a ticket for the train like it thought it would encounter an issue boarding the train again?

[Colin Mochrie]

Yeah, it was chewing gum. That's when he was thrown out of the train. He blew a bubble that gently lifted him to the ground, and that's science.

[Aaron Keenan]

Look it up. That's science.

[Colin Mochrie]

That's for sure. Some physics in there, I will say. So the treat is a treat important.

[JPC]

The treat is not important. The treat is one of those, like, red herrings that gets thrown in. I will say that the answer to this.

[Adel]

Dogs love red herrings.

[JPC]

Oh, yeah. Any herring, any. Any sort of canned fish.

[Adel]

A dog will go crazy for any oily fish. Yeah.

[JPC]

I'll say that the answer to this is very.

[Colin Mochrie]

First of all, I feel you are really pumping up Aaron to make the rest of us feel bad. And then it turns out the treat had nothing to do with this.

[Aaron Keenan]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[JPC]

It's sounds like it's kind of.

[Aaron Keenan]

Is it a smaller dog that's in his mouth?

[JPC]

Oh, interesting.

[Aaron Keenan]

Another dog that another husband threw out of the train.

[JPC]

I'd say the answer here is very like divorce papers. You don't have to think too hard about it. And it doesn't have anything to do with the details of what we've heard in the story before. The dog is running up to the train. I'll read this one again.

[Adel]

Okay.

[Colin Mochrie]

Can I ask, what's the point? What's the point of this riddle?

[Aaron Keenan]

This is what we've been saying. Fuck riddles.

[Colin Mochrie]

So what would be the thing? Is there something we learned from this riddle at the end where you go, well, he had a life insurance and it was always with him, I think.

[Adel]

What? You'll get teeth. Okay.

[JPC]

What's that at all?

[Adel]

Is it simply teeth?

[JPC]

Yes. I mean, kind of. You're so close.

[Aaron Keenan]

A tongue.

[JPC]

Yes, the tongue.

[Aaron Keenan]

Boo.

[JPC]

The tongue.

[Adel]

I do want to see a scene. I do want to see a scene to sort of wash. To sort of wash the taste out of our mouth. Colin, you're exactly right.

[Colin Mochrie]

He had the tongue. His tongue.

[Aaron Keenan]

So my favorite part of the show is watching guests get filled with a rage of a thousand the Irish of.

[Colin Mochrie]

A lot to answer.

[JPC]

Yeah. Neil said the Irish riddles are less riddles and more just kind of like a joke that you get to the end and the dog's tongue is hanging out of your mouth. And I think the correct response is like, oh, oh, yeah, okay. Yeah, okay.

[Adel]

Yeah, okay. I do want to see a scene.

[JPC]

Adel, what scene would you like to see?

[Adel]

Aaron and Colin, you are a married couple. You're on vacation, wherever you'd like to be, and you're having sort of an escalating fight in public where you're sort of one upping each other with acts of anger.

[Colin Mochrie]

Did you bring the camera?

[Aaron Keenan]

I would rather not Commit any of this to memory, if that's okay with you.

[Colin Mochrie]

No, that's not really answering my question. Did you bring the camera and just a simple question. All I need is a yes, I got the camera, and then we can take some pictures. I don't need some sort of existential thing about, Oh, I may have to go and remember everything we're seeing.

[Aaron Keenan]

Sorry, the cute waiter's coming over. Hi.

[JPC]

Oh, I was just coming over to take your drink order, and then I heard kind of the conversation. I thought I'd give you a couple minutes, so.

[Aaron Keenan]

No, no, we're ready.

[Colin Mochrie]

Just get this over with.

[Aaron Keenan]

I would love a watermelon margarita and my friend here.

[Colin Mochrie]

Friend? Can I just say, she's my wife, so don't get well on paper. Stick your tongue back in your mouth there, mister.

[JPC]

Yeah, no, I. Sorry about that. Yeah, tongue kind of commentary.

[Aaron Keenan]

I'm his wife on paper. And also in the bedroom, because that's.

[Colin Mochrie]

Where we've consummated this many a time, and I respect many a time.

[JPC]

Watermelon margarita. I have one of the two drinks. I'm hoping there's a second drink soon.

[Colin Mochrie]

Just a bottle of something.

[Aaron Keenan]

Oh, my God.

[Colin Mochrie]

Oh, your God. Your God. Never accessed it.

[Aaron Keenan]

Sorry. This is. This is embarrassing. I know. I just. I'm married to a leprechaun.

[Colin Mochrie]

Oh.

[Aaron Keenan]

And he's great. Just get him a bottle of whatever and he'll be drunk and he'll make a scene.

[Colin Mochrie]

I stopped growing when I was 12. It happens. I was. We had a big potato. That's all the nutrients I got. Darlin. Darlin woman who I love. Give me a pencil. I just want to make a list of all the things I despise about you.

[Aaron Keenan]

Oh, okay. Perfect. You know, when I married him. Waiter. Where are you going?

[JPC]

Everybody's grabbing my arm. You have to go get the drink.

[Aaron Keenan]

Okay, when I marry it, a cute.

[Colin Mochrie]

Waitress that maybe I can get to talk to.

[JPC]

Yes, I would love to go find that for you. I'd love to go find that for you.

[Aaron Keenan]

When I married him, he had a huge pot of gold. But guess what? He gambled it away. And now we have. We have nothing. We have my income.

[Colin Mochrie]

She's a stripper.

[Aaron Keenan]

I am.

[Colin Mochrie]

I am, but not the thing you're thinking of. She goes into houses and she strips the paint from the walls. No, I can tell by the smell.

[JPC]

I can tell by the smell. That was her job.

[Aaron Keenan]

That's him. That's his terrible leprechaun cologne.

[Adel]

Hi, I'm Claire. This isn't my Table. But I was told you need a waitress.

[Colin Mochrie]

Is there another one?

[Adel]

I have a twin.

[Colin Mochrie]

No, it's all right. You're good. Listen, my wife and I. You seem like a lovely woman. You wouldn't marry someone just because of money, would you?

[Adel]

I'd like to think not, but I guess I'd have to be. I'd have to face the moment, you know?

[Aaron Keenan]

Nobody looks at my husband like that. You walk away from us. You get away from us. Yes, you.

[Adel]

Oh, okay.

[Aaron Keenan]

And don't send your twin over here either.

[Adel]

Oh, she died.

[Aaron Keenan]

Oh.

[JPC]

I'll go with her if that's.

[Aaron Keenan]

No, no, no, no. You stay.

[JPC]

Come on.

[Colin Mochrie]

All right. While you were talking, I took pictures of everyone around the tables here looking at me. Some of them with lust in your eyes. I've never seen. I haven't seen lust in your eyes since. When was it the last World cup.

[Adel]

Seen. I haven't seen lust in your eyes since the last. Be an amazing bumper sticker sweater.

[Colin Mochrie]

You can basically end any scene with that tattoo.

[Adel]

I mean, that's fantastic.

[Aaron Keenan]

That's good improv advice. You could end with that.

[Colin Mochrie]

There's a little improv tip for you kids out there.

[Adel]

That could be an Ed Sheeran song.

[Aaron Keenan]

Yeah.

[Colin Mochrie]

Okay, good.

[JPC]

Okay. I'm reading the room and saying that we did not like that last riddle. Because of that. It wasn't really a riddle. It was just a Irish joke. So this one. Well, I don't think you're going to feel much differently about it, but this is from Christine.

[Colin Mochrie]

Wow. I love the way you set it up.

[JPC]

Christine says, do you know how when geese fly in a V formation, one side of the V is usually longer than the other side of the V. Why is that?

[Adel]

Is this an actual fact or this is like a riddle bit or something?

[JPC]

It's kind of akin to the previous riddle that we listened to, which is, it's not really a fact, but it's more. There's a simple answer to it that will leave everyone going. I don't know.

[Colin Mochrie]

There's one less on one side.

[JPC]

Yeah. That's why there are more geese on the side.

[Aaron Keenan]

Is that it?

[JPC]

Yeah, yeah. Colin got it. The answer is.

[Colin Mochrie]

I got the gist of this now. I got it. I had this whole thing that it was sort of like testicles, where one is lower than the other always. But I couldn't think of what the logic was.

[Aaron Keenan]

I would like to see a scene. The three of you are geese flying south for the winter, and you're all pretty sure that you should be the one to be in front of the triangle.

[Adel]

Well, it's about time to hit the road, everybody. Has everybody used a bathroom or.

[JPC]

I'm gonna go in the air.

[Colin Mochrie]

You guys use bathrooms?

[Adel]

Oh. Oh, Charles. Yes, we all use the bathroom. So that we're not, you know, we're not dirtying the air.

[Colin Mochrie]

No, I just went by the Paul Revere statue. That's me done.

[Adel]

What? Charlie, you hate Paul Revere. Why do you always go on him?

[Colin Mochrie]

It's a sign of respect. It's a sign of respect.

[Adel]

Well, I know some people think it's good luck before we.

[Colin Mochrie]

Okay, so we just follow it.

[JPC]

Yeah, why don't. Why don't we. I think. What is it? Is it my turn this year to lead us south? I think it's my turn.

[Colin Mochrie]

Your turn to go south, for we're geese. This isn't a democracy.

[JPC]

No, no.

[Colin Mochrie]

I've always been the leader.

[JPC]

Okay.

[Colin Mochrie]

I'm pretty sure I've always been the leader. First of all, I was always in front. Were you?

[Adel]

Yeah, I guess let's let Charles. Let's let Charles lead the V. I guess if we want to end up in fucking Reykjavik.

[Colin Mochrie]

Ah, good point.

[Adel]

Not going south.

[Colin Mochrie]

You know, you have no sense of direction already. I'm talking to you. You have your back to me.

[Adel]

Well, that's on purpose. That was on purpose.

[JPC]

Yeah, right. I think that we can all agree Alan does not get to pick. Alan does not get to fly in the front.

[Adel]

What the fuck?

[JPC]

Why, Alan? Because you think that south is just down. Every time we go south, you try to burrow into the ground. That is not south.

[Adel]

Fastest way. Fastest way.

[JPC]

That's not south.

[Adel]

I think outside the box.

[Colin Mochrie]

Alan, you're an idiot.

[JPC]

You're an idiot.

[Colin Mochrie]

We all know this. Everyone has talked about this since you've joined the flock. You're a flocking idiot.

[JPC]

And, Alan, I have read this.

[Colin Mochrie]

How many years? How many years have I let this.

[Adel]

Six, seven.

[JPC]

Six. Seven.

[Adel]

Six. Seven years.

[JPC]

Six, seven years.

[Colin Mochrie]

Yes. All right.

[JPC]

Okay, fine.

[Adel]

You get us started. Hey, let's all get up in the air and you get us started. Okay?

[JPC]

Okay, great.

[Adel]

Go from there.

[Colin Mochrie]

All right, here we go. I mean, look at these majestic flaps. I'm doing, like, with the minimum of effort. And look how I'm speeding mightily towards the south. Are you guys having trouble keeping up?

[Adel]

Well, we're in a bit of a U. Not really a V. This is more of a U.

[JPC]

It's kind of fun.

[Aaron Keenan]

Hey, guys, I hate to complain back here, but are we going to Paul Revere's Childhood home. Right now I feel like we're going in that direction. Wait a sec.

[JPC]

Chuck, are you.

[Adel]

Charles, you are obsessed with Paul Revere. What is with you?

[Colin Mochrie]

Paul Revere was a very important part of American history.

[Adel]

Here we go.

[Colin Mochrie]

True, I'm a Canadian goose, but I've always been fascinated by what Americans have done. And Janine, didn't we go to Meryl Streep's place when you asked?

[Aaron Keenan]

Well, yeah, but she's an American treasure, and she's still alive. Paul Revere's been dead for hundreds of years, you nerd.

[Adel]

Yeah.

[Colin Mochrie]

How much longer? How much longer has she got?

[JPC]

Really?

[Colin Mochrie]

That's. I mean, really.

[Aaron Keenan]

Don't say that. Wow.

[Colin Mochrie]

Could I just say, between her and us, who's going to live longer?

[Adel]

Wow. This conversation went south, I'll tell you that much. Hoping Meryl Streep dies. Unbelievable.

[JPC]

I'll just say. I just say I know that Meryl Streep has a vacation home in Naples, Florida. That's pretty far south. I could get us there. If anyone wanted me to lead, I would love that. I'm going to Florida.

[Colin Mochrie]

I am not going to Florida. That is off the table.

[Adel]

Yeah, I'm with Charles. I'm with Charles.

[Aaron Keenan]

Oh, doesn't suit your politics. We don't even vote.

[JPC]

You guys don't vote.

[Aaron Keenan]

We're geese.

[Adel]

Whoa, Janine.

[Colin Mochrie]

Maybe that's on us. Maybe if we registered, we could make a difference of the people we shit on.

[Adel]

Scene.

[Aaron Keenan]

Oh, brother.

[JPC]

I'm checking when this comes out. And that message was a little late, but I'm sure it'll. I'm sure it'll come down a lot.

[Aaron Keenan]

I'm sure all the geese will vote.

[Adel]

I'm sure all the geese voted. I'm sure the geese were found out. It was found out. The geese voted. And that's been a whole sticking point.

[JPC]

And everybody was pretty chill about that, about some extra geese. Everybody was okay with that?

[Colin Mochrie]

Oh, absolutely. Everyone's fine with everything.

[JPC]

Here's another one. This is a riddle from Isaac. Okay? Now we're more. We're deeper into more of. Like, I would say this is more of a traditional riddle. Here we go.

[Colin Mochrie]

Okay. I've always had good luck with Isaac's. So I'm feeling a little more confident here.

[Aaron Keenan]

Okay, fantastic.

[Adel]

Asimov, the rest of them.

[Colin Mochrie]

You know, I take Asmanov. He wrote the what? The sensuous dirty Old man.

[Adel]

Oh, really?

[Colin Mochrie]

Anyway, there were these sex books in the, you know, 70s. The sensuous man, the Sensuous Woman. And he wrote, like, a parody called the sensuous old man. Anyway, there's a useless sack for you. No riddle involved.

[Adel]

I have to check this out. I know Shel Silverstein wrote a lot for Playboy. Like, wrote a lot of, like, limericks and all kinds of stuff.

[Colin Mochrie]

Yeah, I just read for the. I truly read for the articles. There were really good interviews. No one ever believes you, but it's true, I swear.

[JPC]

God, there's a show Silverstein in here. Yeah, Right.

[Aaron Keenan]

Yeah. Yeah. Is that what you call titties?

[JPC]

Move along. That would be upsetting if that's what I call titties.

[Adel]

Where the sidewalk fucks. What is this?

[JPC]

Okay, so this is a riddle from Isaac, a dirty, lecherous old man. Hands she has, but does not hold. Teeth she has, but does not bite. Feet she has, but they are cold. Eyes she has, but without sight. Who is she?

[Colin Mochrie]

My grandmother.

[Adel]

Is it?

[Aaron Keenan]

Colin's grandmother said wistfully out the window.

[Adel]

So she has teeth, she has feet.

[Colin Mochrie]

She has hands, but can't hold.

[JPC]

Yes.

[Aaron Keenan]

Clock has hands. Hands.

[Colin Mochrie]

That's true. She doesn't have teeth, though.

[Adel]

Is this like Venus Freaking de Milo?

[JPC]

Venus freaking de Milo.

[Colin Mochrie]

She doesn't have arms, though.

[Adel]

Yeah, no. Arms. Did you say arms?

[Colin Mochrie]

She has arms.

[JPC]

I didn't say arms. Let's just assume that she does have arms.

[Colin Mochrie]

She has hands.

[JPC]

She has hands.

[Adel]

Oh, she has the. Oh, she.

[Colin Mochrie]

If you were to have hands without the arms.

[Adel]

I'm just saying, you're the surgeon. All right.

[Aaron Keenan]

You said her feet were cold, too.

[JPC]

She has feet, but they are.

[Colin Mochrie]

She's my grandmother, for sure.

[JPC]

Yeah, I don't necessarily. That one is not my favorite of the descriptors because I feel like it kind of.

[Aaron Keenan]

What's your favorite?

[JPC]

Oh, that's a great question. Eyes without sight. Eyes without Sight is probably my favorite.

[Colin Mochrie]

Eyes. Eyes without sight. Potato, potato, potato.

[JPC]

Potato is definitely there with eyes without sight. It's not potato. Yeah. I wouldn't necessarily even say that these feet are cold. I guess if you.

[Aaron Keenan]

Mrs. Potato.

[JPC]

It's not potato. It's not potato.

[Adel]

Honestly, Mr. Potato is the perfect answer for this.

[Colin Mochrie]

It's perfect. He has hands, but he can't really hold anything. You could attach the hands. You could take his legs off, put them in the freezer. They're cold.

[JPC]

Does Mr. Potato have teeth or does he have lips?

[Adel]

Depends on which mouth you put on.

[Aaron Keenan]

Yeah, that's the whole point.

[JPC]

That's great. That is the whole point.

[Colin Mochrie]

Hands.

[JPC]

It would work, but the answer's not Mr. Potato, but I guess you're kind of circling the right area with Mysticism.

[Aaron Keenan]

Is this something that you can find in nature?

[JPC]

No.

[Adel]

Okay. It's not organic.

[JPC]

It's not organic. It's inorganic.

[Adel]

Inorganic.

[Aaron Keenan]

Is it like a building of some kind?

[JPC]

No, it's not a building of some kind.

[Adel]

Statue of Liberty.

[JPC]

No.

[Colin Mochrie]

I was never sure of the rules of figuring out the riddle.

[JPC]

Yes.

[Colin Mochrie]

Like, can you say, this is it, this is it, this. Or can you tell me the answer?

[JPC]

You can always say, can you tell me the answer? Anyone's allowed to quit and then we'll just. We'll just do the answer. I'm. It's not. Nothing here is sacred.

[Aaron Keenan]

Yeah, we quit all the time.

[JPC]

Yeah, we do.

[Colin Mochrie]

So, hand. See the hands? It does seem towards a clock.

[Adel]

Oh, it's good.

[JPC]

It's not a clock, but this is something that is, I would say, man made.

[Adel]

Jpc. Would you mind reading it one more time?

[JPC]

Hands she has, but does not hold.

[Colin Mochrie]

And those all hold her chins.

[Aaron Keenan]

Yeah?

[JPC]

Yes. Stroke your chins like three Sherlocks. Hands she has, but does not hold. Teeth she has, but does not bite. Feet she has, but they are cold. Eye she has, but without sight. Who is she? I think cold is in their words.

[Colin Mochrie]

And the pronoun is she.

[Adel]

Yeah. Is she important or is that just a placeholder?

[JPC]

I don't think she is necessarily important. I think that this thing is most commonly justice. It is not justice. Is it lady? I will say it's a physicist.

[Adel]

Because she's blind. She has eyes but doesn't see.

[JPC]

It is a physicist.

[Colin Mochrie]

It's a hand that holds a scale.

[Adel]

Jpc. Lady justice has the blind. She has the ninja turtle thing over her eyes.

[Colin Mochrie]

She's always outside. Her feet must be cold.

[Adel]

Is Lady Justice a ninja turtle?

[JPC]

But doesn't justice bite?

[Colin Mochrie]

Comes back to the teeth.

[JPC]

This is a physical thing, a man made thing. It's a physical thing. It's not like a concept. It's not something you find in nature. Someone has to make this. And I think it's.

[Aaron Keenan]

Are eyes like holes? What are the eyes of this?

[JPC]

I guess it could be a lot of different things. They could be holes, I guess.

[Aaron Keenan]

What?

[JPC]

Yeah, it's like Mr. Potato Head. It just depends on what kind of eyes this thing has.

[Adel]

Well, I do want to see. I'm going to say let's see a scene just to give us a little break.

[JPC]

That's so smart.

[Adel]

A little buffer. Yeah, yeah. We're going to say, jpc, you are a science fiction writer, well regarded.

[JPC]

Okay.

[Adel]

And we'll say, Colin, you are an editor for Playboy. You're trying to encourage the science fiction writer to write something a little more salacious.

[Colin Mochrie]

Okay. Read the new article.

[JPC]

Yes.

[Colin Mochrie]

It's pretty good.

[JPC]

Yeah. It's one of. It's one of my. I don't know if it could become something if it's just a short story. I want to live in the space. Live in the world for a little while.

[Colin Mochrie]

Yeah. Yeah.

[JPC]

Did you get. Did you get that?

[Colin Mochrie]

The.

[JPC]

You know, we're from the perspective of the main character and we think he's on an alien world, but really.

[Colin Mochrie]

Yeah, he's not.

[JPC]

He's the alien on our.

[Colin Mochrie]

That's. That's what's great. Yeah, that's the perspective I thought there'd be. Because he. Because of that. I thought it'd be more fucking.

[JPC]

Oh.

[Colin Mochrie]

Because if you, you know. Because if he, you know, he thinks. If he's on an alien planet.

[JPC]

Yeah, no, I think that's the first.

[Colin Mochrie]

Thing people would do. You would think I'm going to reach out and have sex with, I think, the natives so I can.

[JPC]

Yeah, no, I get what you're saying, Larry. I think I set the whole story in a zoo.

[Colin Mochrie]

Yeah.

[JPC]

So that it would be. Yeah, I think it would be.

[Aaron Keenan]

Kind of.

[Colin Mochrie]

Animals can be very sexy, like, alien. If it's an alien animal that you're not quite sure until the end, you find, oh, no, it's a penguin.

[JPC]

Oh. Oh, no. So you. No. Yeah, I guess I could have two penguins having sex. If that's.

[Colin Mochrie]

What's the point of the story? What's your point of the story?

[JPC]

No, I guess. Yeah. I think really the point is maybe things that we don't know are closer to us than we think. And maybe, you know, there's a different perspective of seeing someone else as an alien. You're doodling. You're doodling a little pornographic drawing right now. Are you listening to.

[Colin Mochrie]

I was just thinking when you're close to something, what are you doing? When you're close to something, you're usually fucking them.

[JPC]

Yeah. No. Yeah.

[Aaron Keenan]

Knock, knock. Sorry to interrupt your meeting. My name's Jeff. I'm from the Cincinnati Zoo. I just am here to ask you a few questions.

[Colin Mochrie]

Oh, sorry. I'm kind of a meeting right now about it.

[JPC]

I know the Cincinnati Zoo had. Is it an investigative unit?

[Aaron Keenan]

Yeah, we have enough cases that my job is necessary.

[Colin Mochrie]

Playboy in the zoo work very closely together in a lot of the fiction that comes across our desk. Yeah, go ahead.

[Aaron Keenan]

No, I'm actually here to ask you questions. Okay, You've. And please stop backing up. I feel like you're grabbing your hat and your coat.

[Colin Mochrie]

Well, you're going very close to worst. Meaning you're using threatening hands.

[Aaron Keenan]

Well, I just am saying that we have teeth.

[Colin Mochrie]

I hope you do not bite.

[Aaron Keenan]

Well, I feel like we both know why I'm here. We have security cameras down at the zoo, unfortunately for you.

[Colin Mochrie]

Oh, okay.

[Aaron Keenan]

Okay. So you sort of have a bindle packed. It seems like you thought this day was coming and you're backing out of the room slowly.

[Colin Mochrie]

I'm just saying people don't understand.

[JPC]

Are those security cameras? Are they standard for all zoos as well, or.

[Aaron Keenan]

Oh, I'm gonna get to you, sir.

[JPC]

Okay, great. Yeah. So I should stick around.

[Colin Mochrie]

Oh, geez. Oh. Oh, okay. Well, you should write about that. Write about what? You know, I've told you this.

[Adel]

And we cut to the zoo security footage. I've told you before, I can't run away with you. I'm a Kodiak bear. I'm stuck here.

[Colin Mochrie]

Hey, you know what? You know how dangerous this is for me.

[Adel]

I know, but it's.

[JPC]

You're a bear.

[Colin Mochrie]

I don't know if you're gonna. I don't know if you're going to, like, put out the way I want, if you're going to be tender or just going to, like, savage me.

[Adel]

It's.

[JPC]

I hope you.

[Adel]

It's kinky, huh? You never know. Can I run my claws up and down your back, sweetie?

[Colin Mochrie]

All right, softly, though. I have a writer's meeting tomorrow.

[JPC]

Yeah.

[Adel]

And let's treat that dick like a picnic.

[Colin Mochrie]

Okay. Wait a minute. See, those are the kind of sentences that I don't.

[Aaron Keenan]

Oh, no. Some of the sound bites from this episode are absolutely out of control.

[Colin Mochrie]

They really are.

[Adel]

Aaron, could that dick as a picnic be an Ed Sheeran song or.

[Aaron Keenan]

Yes, because I believe in him.

[Adel]

Good. Okay, good. Phew. Phew.

[Colin Mochrie]

Would that then be a dick, Nick?

[Adel]

Yes, I think so.

[Colin Mochrie]

Well, I don't feel that scene really helped us solve the riddle.

[JPC]

No, I forgot what we were doing.

[Aaron Keenan]

Our riddle.

[Adel]

Oh, can you jpc. Can we get.

[Aaron Keenan]

Where would you find this thing?

[Adel]

Yeah, where'd we find this thing?

[JPC]

Okay, so, like, I would say, like, in the same kind of place you would find a Mr. Potato Head. You would also find this as well.

[Adel]

So it's a toy.

[JPC]

A toy toy.

[Adel]

Or in a store. It is a toy. It is a toy.

[JPC]

It is a toy.

[Aaron Keenan]

A Barbie.

[JPC]

Erin. It is a Barbie. Or doll. A doll more generally. But a Barbie works, yes. Hands, but does not. Hands, but does not.

[Colin Mochrie]

Come on.

[Adel]

All these riddles are like Occam's Razor, where it's just like.

[Colin Mochrie]

Was that from Isaac? Here goes my Isaac streak.

[Adel]

That's the name of this episode is There goes my Isaac Streak. Let's take a quick break and we'll be right back with more infur. Colin Mochary.

[Colin Mochrie]

That's insane.

[Aaron Keenan]

There's been zero days since my last Isaac incident.

[JPC]

This podcast is sponsored by Squarespace.

[Adel]

Hear ye, hear ye. I am the town square crier, and I have big news for the whole square.

[JPC]

Hey, move, man. We're driving. This is a road, dude. Can't be.

[Adel]

No. I'm a time traveler and I'm here to tell you about Squarespace. Have you heard about Squarespace?

[JPC]

Wait, wait, wait. Roll them down. Roll them down. Squarespace.

[Adel]

Squarespace.

[Aaron Keenan]

Up or down?

[JPC]

Crack it.

[Aaron Keenan]

Okay.

[Adel]

Can you put it all the way down?

[JPC]

No, just crack it.

[Aaron Keenan]

Let me just crack it.

[JPC]

What is Squarespace?

[Adel]

Squarespace is the all in one website platform for entrepreneurs to stand out and succe. Whether you're just starting out or managing a growing brand.

[JPC]

The cadence is going to drive me crazy.

[Aaron Keenan]

I love it. Rolls window down. More.

[JPC]

No, I know about Squarespace. They have Squarespace payments and it's the easiest way to manage your payments in one place. With Squarespace, onboarding is fast and simple. You get started in just a few clicks and you can start receiving payments right away. Plus, you can give your customers more ways to pay with popular payment methods like Klarna, Ach, Direct Debit in the US Apple Pay Afterpay, and Clear Pay.

[Adel]

Clear Pay? We don't even have clear drinking water where I'm from.

[Aaron Keenan]

Well, Squarespace makes it easy to sell access to content on your websites like online courses, blogs, videos, memberships. Earn recurring revenue by gating your content behind a paywall. Simply set the price and choose whether to charge a one time fee or subscription for access.

[Adel]

Yes, and Squarespace allows you to travel forward in time to warn everyone about Mary Queen of Scots. Her reign will be a terrible rain.

[JPC]

Don't know if it does let you do that, but I do know it has SEO tools where you can get discovered fast. With integrated SEO tools, every Squarespace website is optimized to be indexed with meta descriptions, an auto generated sitemap, and more. So you show up more often to more people and global search engine results.

[Adel]

Oh, SEO. Mary Queen of Scots. Ew. Overthrow.

[Aaron Keenan]

Okay, gpc. What do we think? Hit him. Drive around him. Hit him.

[JPC]

Windows down. Hit this guy with the car, please.

[Aaron Keenan]

Windows up. Hit him.

[Adel]

Please don't hit me.

[JPC]

Anyway, head to squarespace.com for a free trial. And when you're ready to launch squarespace.com riddle to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or a domain.

[Adel]

Or if you're in the past, talk to the tallest horse and ask it for directions to Squarespace Dark Kingdom. That was my horse.

[JPC]

Catch it. Quick, catch it.

[Aaron Keenan]

Hi.

[JPC]

Come in, come in, come in, come in.

[Aaron Keenan]

Welcome to my Rocket Money party. I'm celebrating the anniversary of when I downloaded Rocket Money and it changed my life and financial health. Come in, come in, come in.

[JPC]

People are really just doing whatever for parties now, huh?

[Aaron Keenan]

Yes. And guess what? Rocket Money is a personal finance app that helps find and cancel your unwanted subscriptions, monitors your spending, and helps lower your bills so you can grow your saving.

[Adel]

Aaron. There's no food, but there's just a ton of bowls and plates with cash on them. What's cool?

[Aaron Keenan]

Yeah, because Rocket Money helped me save around $700 this year by helping me cancel my subscription. Can you believe?

[Adel]

Still an insane move to put this out at a party.

[Aaron Keenan]

I'm awesome. This party rocks. Have fun.

[JPC]

I can't eat cash. And you said come hungry, so. Well, I mean, hey, hungry for cash. I do love how Rocket Money lets you see all your subscriptions in one place and know exactly where your money is going. And for any you don't want anymore, Rocket Money can help you cancel them with a few taps. That, to me, is very cool.

[Adel]

What's not cool is that most Americans think they spend about $62 per month on subscriptions, but the real number is closer to $300.

[Aaron Keenan]

No.

[JPC]

Wild. Wild.

[Aaron Keenan]

No.

[Adel]

I am subscribed to something called Yum Yum Yum online magazine.

[JPC]

That makes sense for you, though. Come on, though. Come on.

[Adel]

I'll keep that one. Sorry. I'll keep that one.

[Aaron Keenan]

Rocket Money has over 5 million users and has saved a total of 500 million in canceled subscriptions, saving members up to $740 a year when using all of the app's features.

[JPC]

Okay, hold on. Rocket money has 5 million users and saved 500 million canceled subscriptions. So that means it'll save every user a million dollars. No, hold on.

[Aaron Keenan]

Bad math. That's why you need Rocket Money.

[JPC]

I need Rocket Money for my math.

[Aaron Keenan]

Everything is color coded JPC and is so satisfying to use and helps me stay so organized. I am so grateful to have it.

[JPC]

Slaps the money out of Adel's mouth as he tries to eat it. Stop wasting money on things you don't use. Cancel your unwanted subscriptions by going to RocketMoney.com Riddle that's RocketMoney.com Riddle R I D D L E RocketMoney.com Riddle well, it finally happened.

[Adel]

JPC came down to where I work and slapped the cash out of my mouth.

[Aaron Keenan]

Hit us with that yawn sound.

[Adel]

Oh, a wild bird. Okay, Aaron, don't yawn.

[Aaron Keenan]

You're gonna do it.

[JPC]

Aaron, don't yawn. You're gonna make me yawn. Hiya.

[Aaron Keenan]

Ooh.

[Adel]

Ooh.

[JPC]

I told you you wouldn't like it the way I yawn.

[Aaron Keenan]

I'm exhausted. I think I gotta go home to my Helix mattress.

[Adel]

Oh, yeah. I gotta go home to my Helix mattress. I love my Helix mattress.

[JPC]

And I am home. And I'm on my Helix mattress. It's a midnight luxe. It's the best mattress I've ever had in my entire life. And I'm sleeping on it right now. And this is a dream. Ivan said you're my puppets.

[Aaron Keenan]

Yes, Ann.

[Adel]

Yes, Ann. Yes.

[Aaron Keenan]

Anne.

[Adel]

Gemma and I also have a midnight Lux. It's the most comfortable bed we've ever owned. It's the best sleep I've ever gotten in my life. Sometimes when our cats are being rambunctious, we'll pick one of them up, say brisket, we'll put him on the Helix. Sleep immediately. He spins around three times, lays down, goes to bed. It soothes all creatures.

[Aaron Keenan]

I've had my mattress for about three years. It still is as good as it was the first night I slept on it. And anytime I have a guest come and they stay in my room, they always go, what is this mattress? I'm obsessed.

[Adel]

Oh, a guest.

[JPC]

Aaron, didn't you say that your mattress still sleeps like it's brand spanking new? And didn't you wink when you said spanking?

[Aaron Keenan]

You were here for that?

[JPC]

This could have been a different conversation. Could have had a conversation with a completely different guy.

[Aaron Keenan]

You're in my dream, and you're a puppet, and I'm insane. And you're inside.

[JPC]

Good. And do we all have Helix midnight luxe? Is that the mattress that we all have?

[Aaron Keenan]

I think so.

[JPC]

We are all the same sleeper. Wow.

[Adel]

Well, we just sleep at different times.

[JPC]

We just sleep at different times. But only one of us could be asleep at any given time. Isn't that true? And isn't that true?

[Aaron Keenan]

And isn't that true?

[Adel]

Isn't that true? And you must remember, remember, remember, remember, remember. It is November, which means there is a November offer right now. 25% off site wide. You get two free dream pillows with Any mattress purchase. There's also a free bedding bundle. You get two dream pillows, sheet set and mattress protector with any luxe or elite mattress order. And you can find all that and more by going to helixleep.com Riddle Again, that's helixsleep.com Riddle all right, you're going to bed.

[Aaron Keenan]

Okay?

[Adel]

You're getting comfy.

[JPC]

Helix, Sleep. Sleep like a podcaster.

[Aaron Keenan]

Oh, my gosh. CPC hit us with one more yawn.

[Adel]

Oh, boy, A cowboy just came running over. This episode is sponsored by BetterHelp.

[JPC]

Hey, Adol. Hey, Aaron. I got a bone to pick with the two of you.

[Aaron Keenan]

Of course you do.

[Adel]

Okay, let's go ahead, you two.

[JPC]

Sometimes you two do not have a bone.

[Adel]

You don't have a bone. Oh, my God, this is so embarrassing. Jpc.

[JPC]

I have a bone to pick with myself. I. I just haven't really been my best lately and I. I guess I just don't know what to do.

[Adel]

BetterHelp. Have you heard of BetterHelp?

[JPC]

JPC? BetterHelp? BetterHelp. It's online therapy designed to be convenient, flexible, and suited to my schedule. Betterhelp.

[Aaron Keenan]

I know. And it's sometimes hard to remind ourselves that we're trying to make our best to make sense of everything in this crazy world, but it's not easy. Jpc. Sometimes you wake up and you don't have a bone to pick when you want to, you know?

[Adel]

Yeah.

[Aaron Keenan]

All you have to do JPC with BetterHelp is fill out a brief questionnaire to get matched with a licensed therapist, and you can switch therapists at any time for no additional charge. I've been using BetterHelp, and guess what? JBC.

[JPC]

What?

[Aaron Keenan]

It helps a lot. It could help you.

[JPC]

I mean, I do like online therapy. I do like being able to, you know, email my therapist when I have a conflict or be able to stay at home while I'm doing my therapy so that I don't have to drive all the way to an office and get into a big confrontation with a guy in the parking lot. Which is why I don't go to that parking lot anymore.

[Adel]

Oh, yeah, you've had 10 to 12 bone depicts in the parking lot, right? You can't go back to that parking lot.

[JPC]

Maybe that's why I have to go back to get my bone depicts back. And I know we're doing an ad for something and we keep saying it's going to help you get your bone depicts back. And I don't want you to read it too much if you get it.

[Aaron Keenan]

In the Context of jpc. You understand who he is as a person that that is connected to his mojo and his sense of self.

[JPC]

Let the gratitude flow with BetterHelp. Visit BetterHelp to get 10% off your first month. That's BetterHelp. H E L P.com Riddle.

[Aaron Keenan]

My dad just texted me the music video for Yellow by Coldplay and said, have you seen this?

[Colin Mochrie]

How old's your dad?

[JPC]

That looks like 20 years ago.

[Aaron Keenan]

Your dad is in his late 70s. Yeah. That song's like 20 years old. I think my chat just does.

[Colin Mochrie]

It takes a little longer for things to show up on certain playlists.

[Aaron Keenan]

That's so funny.

[Adel]

For things to trickle down or trickle up.

[Aaron Keenan]

I love that. Oh, brother.

[JPC]

Okay, we are back. Our Isaac streak is busted. But we are back. We have some riddles. Hopefully these are riddles that will redeem us all. These are from Milty. We did Aaron and adult.

[Colin Mochrie]

I mean, are they riddles? Some of them are just like, you know, the suspect looked like this.

[JPC]

We did. We did a couple of Milty. I think we actually did one of Miltie's riddles on a previous episode, and they are, I would say, pretty good riddles. These are okay.

[Aaron Keenan]

Okay.

[JPC]

These are definitely riddles.

[Adel]

This is like, what color is a flamingo at midnight? And it's like pink. It's like, yeah, it's pink. It's still pink. It's still pink.

[JPC]

It's still pink. It's a flamingo.

[Colin Mochrie]

It's midnight.

[JPC]

Yeah.

[Aaron Keenan]

I'm ready.

[JPC]

Okay, here we go.

[Adel]

I'm ready. I'm ready.

[Colin Mochrie]

I'm ready.

[JPC]

I'm hard to see through when you're in my midst there's quite a bit you might have missed. I set in quickly. I'm never loud. I hide all things within my shroud.

[Colin Mochrie]

Now here we go.

[Aaron Keenan]

Oh, iceberg. Here we go.

[Colin Mochrie]

Iceberg.

[Aaron Keenan]

Darkness.

[Colin Mochrie]

Next.

[JPC]

Collins said iceberg and then threw his napkin down on the table and did the little two fingers for the check.

[Aaron Keenan]

Next. Silence.

[JPC]

It's not silence and it's not darkness and it's not iceberg. Those are all good guesses, though.

[Adel]

Says I hide all things with my veil.

[JPC]

I'm hard to see when you're in my midst there's quite a bit you might have missed. I set in quickly. I'm never loud. I hide all things within my shroud.

[Adel]

Shroud.

[Colin Mochrie]

Fog.

[JPC]

Yes, Colin, you got it. It is foggy. Also would have accepted mist or a cloud.

[Adel]

A madhog is perfect.

[Colin Mochrie]

Are there prizes that go with this?

[Aaron Keenan]

No. Yes. We send you a Christmas ham if you answer 10 riddles correctly.

[Colin Mochrie]

Christmas ham.

[JPC]

Perfect.

[Colin Mochrie]

Nothing better going through the mail than a Christmas ham.

[Aaron Keenan]

Yeah, we send it in a manila envelope. It's pretty disgusting by the time.

[Colin Mochrie]

Nice.

[JPC]

We get as much ham as we can fit into one of those flat rate boxes because we're only paying the 3.99 but it'll be full of ham. Okay, great job. Colin, you have one point. Adel and Aaron. Still nothing. Still nothing on the box.

[Adel]

No.

[Colin Mochrie]

I feel good. Also, Aaron's father just sent me a Coldplay song.

[Adel]

Oh, that's weird.

[Aaron Keenan]

Viva la vida. Wow. I'll check it out.

[JPC]

My skull is thick, I'm not tall, but when I fall you'll bust your gut. If we butt heads, I'll have you beat. I have no brain, but I have meat.

[Adel]

The fuck?

[JPC]

I like this one as well.

[Aaron Keenan]

Huh?

[JPC]

My skull is thick, but I'm not tall. When I fall, you'll bust your guts.

[Colin Mochrie]

How do those two things go together? Yeah, my skull is thick, but I'm not tall.

[Aaron Keenan]

I'm sorry, I don't associate thick skulls with tall people.

[JPC]

Oh, you absolutely should. My skull is thick, I'm not tall, but when I fall, you'll bust your gut. If we butt heads, I'll have you beat. I have no brain, but I have meat. Everyone's looking in a different direction.

[Colin Mochrie]

Donkey clown.

[Adel]

Is it a donkey clown?

[Colin Mochrie]

That would be so great. Yes, it's a donkey clown.

[JPC]

Yeah, it's a donkey clown. Damn. I really didn't thought think you guys are going to get to donkey clown on that one.

[Adel]

Kids, gather around. I hired a donkey clown.

[Aaron Keenan]

Yeah, I would like to see a scene. Colin, you are a clown. A donkey clown specifically, that's been hired for a children's birthday party. And Adel, you're the birthday boy. You're just trying to figure out like why this is happening.

[Adel]

Um, excuse me, sir. Oh, thank you for the lift. Are you a pinata or.

[Colin Mochrie]

No, I'm a donkey clown. The only one in existence. Squirt. Sorry. Usually most clowns do it with their noses, but you saw, I do things a little differently because I'm a donkey clown.

[Adel]

Oh boy. I guess, I guess this is what eight years old are you, little boy? Just turning eight today.

[Colin Mochrie]

Sir, let me give you a kick.

[Adel]

Oh, I'd rather just like a balloon animal or like a pie in the face or.

[Colin Mochrie]

Well, I don't know if you noticed. Again, I'll mention it. I'm a donkey clown. I can't manipulate balloons to make animals. Of course, but if you'll stick this one in my ass. Watch this.

[Adel]

Mom. Mom.

[Aaron Keenan]

Yes, honey? Be nice to the clown. He's my friend, Jeff from work. He's just going through a divorce. He needs this.

[Adel]

You work with a donkey?

[Colin Mochrie]

Olympia, I just want to thank you for the work. I really want to expand. I can't work in HR anymore.

[Aaron Keenan]

And I get that, you know. Happy to have you here.

[Colin Mochrie]

So nice to meet you. Know, I've always felt.

[Aaron Keenan]

Don't do this here.

[Colin Mochrie]

I'm just saying, I know it's in front of your child.

[Aaron Keenan]

I know, but my husband is right over there. Jeff.

[Colin Mochrie]

I could kick him in the head. Just take his head right off. You'd never know.

[JPC]

Olympia, is there something going on over here? Did you need me?

[Aaron Keenan]

No, honey, just keep going. And putting the candles on the cake.

[JPC]

Oh, Jeff, didn't see you there.

[Colin Mochrie]

Nice to see.

[JPC]

Yeah. Still doing the whole clowning thing, huh?

[Colin Mochrie]

Yes. I'm just waiting for your son to remove the balloon from my ass and then I'll move on to my next trick.

[Adel]

Wait, which one's my dad? Which one's my dad? Which one do I shoot? Mom, which one do I shoot?

[Aaron Keenan]

Neither. You smile. It's your birthday. Nice.

[JPC]

Oh, son, I can explain this. This is a donkey clown. I am a clown donkey. We're completely different things.

[Colin Mochrie]

Oh, you're fooling yourself, Jeff. We've always been the same.

[JPC]

Oh, yeah? If we're the same, then that means that you're not the only donkey clown in the world.

[Adel]

Mom, they're circling each other.

[Aaron Keenan]

Don't get in the way, son. Put a balloon in my ass. In a long time coming.

[JPC]

Put a balloon in my ass. It's a clown. Off.

[Aaron Keenan]

Whoever stays alive will be my husband.

[Adel]

Mom, David Attenborough's here.

[Aaron Keenan]

Oh, mom, let him talk.

[JPC]

Sorry, I have a cold. It's David Attenborough, but I have a cold Seed.

[Aaron Keenan]

Seed. Zade, are we in the middle of a riddle still?

[JPC]

It's the very middle of a riddle. And I will say I don't think you guys are even close, because no one's guessed yet.

[Aaron Keenan]

I forget what the riddle is.

[JPC]

Skull thick.

[Colin Mochrie]

I'm still on fog. Still living that.

[Adel]

And you've earned that, Colin. You've earned that.

[JPC]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Riding high on fog.

[Adel]

I have a skull, but I'm not tall.

[JPC]

I'm not tall, but when I fall, you'll bust your gut. If we butt heads, I'll have you beat. I have no brain, but I have me.

[Adel]

So bust your gut. Makes me think. Is that like, crack up like Bust a gut like you're laughing because I've only cantaloupe.

[JPC]

Aaron.

[Adel]

Aaron.

[Aaron Keenan]

Watermelon. Cantaloupe or watermelon or honeydew. It's some kind of.

[Colin Mochrie]

Can I just say, I love the commitment. You shouted that out.

[JPC]

Aaron, you are so close. It is not cantal, watermelon, honeydew, or watermelon or anything.

[Colin Mochrie]

Coconut.

[JPC]

It is coconut. Colin. Got it sniped, ya.

[Colin Mochrie]

I could not have done it without Aaron's crazy. Guess.

[Adel]

Colin is crushing us.

[JPC]

Oh, I think the operative thing there is I have no brain, but I have meat, because coconuts have that sweet coconut meat.

[Colin Mochrie]

Yeah, the old coconut meat.

[Adel]

They got milk, they got meat.

[Colin Mochrie]

Yeah, they're the perfect food.

[Adel]

Dang it.

[JPC]

So good. Yeah. So close. But still Colin is on the board and you two are not. Here we go, your next one.

[Aaron Keenan]

I'm never going to win the Christmas ham. Erin, I hate it.

[Colin Mochrie]

I want you to be a little more confident.

[Aaron Keenan]

I'll try. Colin, maybe if there was a Coldplay.

[Colin Mochrie]

Song you could listen to that inspired you.

[Aaron Keenan]

I can't wait to rewatch this music video.

[Adel]

The whole thing is that it's in reverse. Maybe.

[Aaron Keenan]

Is it?

[Adel]

I think so. I think that's the yellow video.

[JPC]

Yeah. Yes. Is that the one on the beach?

[Aaron Keenan]

Mm.

[JPC]

Yeah.

[Adel]

Yeah. I think he's walking on the beach backwards the whole time.

[Aaron Keenan]

Cool.

[JPC]

Excited to watch. The trick to that video, Aaron, is it looks like they just shot it and then reversed it. But no, he honestly did that whole thing backwards.

[Aaron Keenan]

Ah.

[JPC]

Yeah.

[Adel]

And that's how he got Gwyneth Paltrow. She was so impressed.

[Colin Mochrie]

So this podcast is not only fun, but you learn things.

[Aaron Keenan]

Yeah, Usually no. Usually, no. I'd say.

[JPC]

I'd say usually it's only fun. Usually it's some of the most. Most fun you could ever have in an afternoon. But today we're learning. Here's your next riddle. All right, now, Aaron and Adol, I think that you guys are going to get this one because I think that we've done this or something similar before, so maybe hold your peace if you know it right away.

[Colin Mochrie]

Oh, that makes it a little easier for some people.

[JPC]

For them specifically, it makes it very easy for the two of them.

[Colin Mochrie]

I'm just saying.

[JPC]

I have a mouth but cannot speak. I never groan but sometimes creak when you leave, I'll make you shiver. I'm not a serpent, but I slither a river. Yes. Wow. Adela, dear, you both knew that one didn't say it. Damn.

[Aaron Keenan]

I actually did not remember. I did not Know you told us.

[Adel]

Not to say the answer.

[Aaron Keenan]

What the fuck?

[JPC]

I don't know. That doesn't sound like me. I'm usually pretty nice. Yes, it is a river. Congratulations. I do want to see a quick scene. Eren, you are a snake who thinks that you are a river. And the three of us are other snakes who are trying to get you to come back to kind of reality.

[Adel]

Hey, guys. Deborah's having a moment, so just, like, let's indulge her. Let's try and be kind.

[Colin Mochrie]

Is that the right way to go, though? Will this help her in any way?

[Adel]

Oh, she's coming, she's coming, she's coming.

[Aaron Keenan]

Ooh, scary snakes.

[Colin Mochrie]

Hey.

[Aaron Keenan]

I hate snakes. Scary. Hi.

[Adel]

Hey. What are you. What are you up to this morning?

[JPC]

How's it going, girl?

[Aaron Keenan]

Nice to see you on the path. Yeah. Some mushrooms. Oh, I'm thinking about letting people canoe down me later. What are you guys up to?

[Adel]

Classic.

[Colin Mochrie]

What? What? What? What are you talking about?

[JPC]

Steve, just.

[Colin Mochrie]

Can you. Down there.

[Aaron Keenan]

Yeah, I'm a river. You guys are snakes. We're sort of all in nature. We're all sort of. Why are you guys looking at me like that?

[Colin Mochrie]

Well, what makes you think you're a river?

[Aaron Keenan]

Look at me, Steve.

[Colin Mochrie]

I'm looking at you. It's like I'm looking at myself. I see no river there at all.

[JPC]

You know what, Deborah? I would love to canoe down you later if that. That's. If. If that's on offer.

[Colin Mochrie]

Encourage this.

[JPC]

Why? She's fragile.

[Colin Mochrie]

How is this going to help her?

[Aaron Keenan]

Look how I'm shaped. Look how. Look how. Look how I'm shaped.

[Colin Mochrie]

Look how we're all shaped, Deborah. Oh, for God's sake.

[Aaron Keenan]

Maybe if you were mushrooms like me, you would understand and see the world clearly. I woke up today and I was like, I actually know exactly who I am, and I'm a river. What's your problem?

[Adel]

Yeah, Deborah, I just.

[Colin Mochrie]

Look behind you. You've just shed your skin. Do rivers have skin to have mine?

[Aaron Keenan]

Oh, my God. Am I a snake? Oh, my God.

[Adel]

No. Look, a frog. A frog just jumped inside you. You must be a river.

[Aaron Keenan]

Oh, my God.

[JPC]

No. Yeah, you're full. You're. Look at all the pond scum on you. Do snakes have pond scum?

[Colin Mochrie]

First of all, I've had many a suicidal frog leap into me. Doesn't make me a river.

[JPC]

You know what? No, Deborah. You know what? I think Steve's a river, too. In fact, none of us are snakes, and we're all rivers. Steve, she needs this.

[Aaron Keenan]

Am I on A bad drug trip. You guys would tell me, right? No.

[Colin Mochrie]

Yeah, of course I'm trying to tell you. But these guys want you to believe you're a river. I'm the one you can believe. For God's sake, Deborah, you know me.

[Adel]

You're shaking her by the. Well, not shoulders. You're shaking her by the. We don't have shoulders.

[Aaron Keenan]

Riverbend.

[Adel]

The Riverbends. Thank you, Deborah.

[Aaron Keenan]

Yeah. Yeah, I'm a river.

[Colin Mochrie]

Hey, sweetie. Debbie, look into my eyes.

[Aaron Keenan]

Okay.

[Colin Mochrie]

Look into my eyes.

[Aaron Keenan]

Yeah.

[Colin Mochrie]

Who are you?

[Aaron Keenan]

I'm a snake.

[Colin Mochrie]

That's right. Do you want to be a river?

[Aaron Keenan]

Yeah.

[Colin Mochrie]

Why?

[Aaron Keenan]

Because snakes are spooky. I'm scared of snakes.

[Colin Mochrie]

Some people are afraid of water. Reverse will be scary to some people.

[Aaron Keenan]

Okay.

[Colin Mochrie]

I find you very attractive. You're a very attractive snake.

[Aaron Keenan]

No, no. You. No one thinks that. Right, guys?

[Colin Mochrie]

Everybody thinks that. Everyone talks about how beautiful you are.

[JPC]

Not really my type.

[Colin Mochrie]

Okay, well, you know, you can.

[Aaron Keenan]

We're dating.

[Colin Mochrie]

Oh, gosh.

[JPC]

I'm not dating a river. I mean, come on. I can't date a river. You guys were supposed to break up.

[Colin Mochrie]

With the fact she was a river.

[JPC]

You guys were supposed to help me break up with her because I can't date a river. What good are you guys? I've been gaslighting her to be a river all week.

[Adel]

Frog jumps in your mouth.

[JPC]

Oh, come on. These frogs. Something's wrong with these frogs. Can we all talk about the frogs?

[Colin Mochrie]

Hey, look at that bear over there. It's pretty hot.

[Aaron Keenan]

Are we in the middle of another riddle I keep forgetting?

[JPC]

No, you are.

[Adel]

No, because Colin came on and solving them on.

[Colin Mochrie]

Yeah, Sorry.

[Aaron Keenan]

No, you're great.

[JPC]

We do have a couple riddles left, though, so.

[Aaron Keenan]

Okay.

[JPC]

If in the sea you want to sink to the darkest depths as black as ink, say hi and wave. Unless I've hid. We'll both be happy that you did.

[Adel]

Squid.

[JPC]

Yes.

[Colin Mochrie]

Octopus.

[JPC]

This is squid. Animals. More specifically, someone asked a long time ago, you asked if someone could make a riddle that the answer is a portmanteau of the word riddle. And so the answer to this is technically squiddle, because this is a squid ripple.

[Aaron Keenan]

I'd like to see a scene. Holland and adl. You are like deep sea scientists and you're in a submarine and jpc. You can choose whatever you are, but you're an unusual creature that they run into down there.

[Adel]

Okay, doctor, we're at 14,000 knots.

[Colin Mochrie]

Okay. I don't think that's a depth of any kind, but that's a speed and you're wrong.

[Adel]

Okay.

[Colin Mochrie]

Didn't you read the manual, for God's sake? We've got this grant for deep sea scientists, and I feel you're. You're letting us down.

[Adel]

I am. I had. I was on my honeymoon right when we got notification that we got the grant, and I just. I feel so bad, but I feel like I got it. I feel like I got it.

[Colin Mochrie]

Okay, just don't say nautical stuff. Just let's concentrate on your strength, which is the biological animals that we're about to see.

[Adel]

Yes, yes, yes, yes.

[Colin Mochrie]

They're happy. Oh, seahorse.

[Adel]

Yes, I see horse. Don't treat me like a child, doctor.

[Colin Mochrie]

No, no, I'm just talking. Look, this is. This is the most unusual type of seahorse I've ever seen. It's like an actual horse.

[Adel]

This is so odd. A horse with gills. Doctor, I'm gonna go ahead and attempt to grab him with the mechanical arms attached to the submersive.

[Colin Mochrie]

All right.

[Adel]

Sort of a. I don't know why the submersive did this, but it sort of set up like a claw machine. So do you have, like, a quarter or.

[Colin Mochrie]

Oh, hold on, let me just. Yep, here's a quarter.

[Adel]

Okay. All right. All right.

[Colin Mochrie]

No, to the left. No.

[Adel]

Okay, up to the left. Am I above? Am I above him? Am I above them? And hit the button.

[Aaron Keenan]

Maybe a little.

[Adel]

Oh. Oh, it's got him by the leg. It's got him by the leg. Come on, come on, come on, come on, come on.

[Colin Mochrie]

Okay, you're turning on the horse. It's okay.

[Adel]

You go. Okay, you go.

[JPC]

Somebody go. Somebody go.

[Colin Mochrie]

Oh, wait a minute. It seems to be talking. It's underwater. I can hear him talk underwater.

[Adel]

The microphones are on, sir. The ocean mics are on.

[Colin Mochrie]

No. Did you just see the seahorse? You just swear one. I mean, and that is the definitive. When you're trying to hide something from someone, you say, I mean, so we.

[Adel]

Are turning him on.

[Colin Mochrie]

You're missing the important part is there's a talking seahorse that we've just grabbed.

[JPC]

No, we're not talking seahorse talking.

[Adel]

No, no, the horse, Doctor. The horse just said. Nuh.

[Colin Mochrie]

See, who would you believe, a scientist such as me or a seahorse who's telling you he's not talking? Well, how did you get to be a scientist?

[Adel]

I won a raffle at the Ohio State Fair.

[Colin Mochrie]

Really?

[Adel]

Yeah. I bought an arm's length of tickets for $15. They pulled my number, and I was declared Ohio's finest scientist.

[Colin Mochrie]

Ohio's finest underwater scientist. There's so many Things to unpack. There. Horse, can you hear me?

[JPC]

Hey, can somebody get back on that claw machine or.

[Aaron Keenan]

Oh, is.

[Adel]

He's grabbed the mic. He's gonna do a tight five.

[Aaron Keenan]

That horse is a pervert.

[JPC]

No, no. Okay, we have time for one more. Let's do one more of these riddles.

[Adel]

Okay.

[Colin Mochrie]

All right.

[JPC]

I like this one. If you take me to a picnic lunch, you'll have to take me out a bunch. Leave me alone and I'll be fine. But take me to dinner.

[Adel]

This is the bear from the scene. Oh, sorry. This is the bear from the previous scene.

[JPC]

But take me to dinner.

[Aaron Keenan]

The dick Nick.

[JPC]

This is our dick Nick. But take me to dinner and I'll whine and.

[Adel]

Sorry. And I'll. Wine.

[JPC]

Wine. Yeah.

[Adel]

Is that what you said?

[JPC]

I said grape. This is a grape.

[Adel]

Is it grape?

[JPC]

It is a grape.

[Adel]

Holy shit.

[JPC]

You'll have to take me out a bunch.

[Adel]

Four points.

[JPC]

Take me to dinner and I will.

[Adel]

Grapes.

[JPC]

You did exo. Well, I guess we have to.

[Colin Mochrie]

I think I'm giving up this improv thing and just going into riddle. I don't know what a riddle job would be exactly. Riddle master is this.

[Adel]

I think we're the only three that have it.

[JPC]

Yeah. You should keep your job because. Yeah, this.

[Aaron Keenan]

The public will never forgive us if you quit improv to go into riddles full time.

[Colin Mochrie]

No, I'm telling you riddles. I just found my calling.

[Aaron Keenan]

Please don't.

[Colin Mochrie]

This is what I want.

[JPC]

No, no, no.

[Aaron Keenan]

Please don't do this. We need you.

[Adel]

Before the break, furious at riddles and Isaacs. After the break, four riddles solved. Colin, What a turn. What a turn.

[Colin Mochrie]

I think it was my anger at Isaac that just made me. Wasn't there a. Wasn't there a God thing with Isaac? Abraham.

[JPC]

Isaac kill his son. Or his son was Nathan or Abraham killed Isaac. Isaac. Yes.

[Colin Mochrie]

And Isaac told. Yeah, Isaac told a lame riddle and Abraham went, forget it.

[JPC]

And Abraham said, you know what? God. Maybe not. Maybe not. My worst. My. The worst idea you ever had. Killing Isaac on the altar.

[Aaron Keenan]

So, Colin, do you think that you're gonna be incorporating riddles into your life more? Do you think you're gonna try more escape rooms, less sex? What's the plan moving forward?

[Colin Mochrie]

Well, I think you could probably. If you actually listen to your question, you can figure it out.

[Aaron Keenan]

Yeah, I'm hearing it back and I'm thinking and. Yeah, okay. And I hear it and I got it.

[Colin Mochrie]

Yes.

[Adel]

Tell riddle.

[Colin Mochrie]

Once the show's over. I'm done. You know, I was just being kind because this is your job and your life. But, yeah, I'll never have another riddle anywhere near me.

[Aaron Keenan]

Very validating.

[Adel]

And I just got a restraining order in an email. Okay, that's new.

[Aaron Keenan]

Yeah, that was fast.

[Adel]

Never seen that before.

[Colin Mochrie]

Oh, yeah, I just sent it with a Ricky Martin video, too.

[JPC]

Colin, it is late November. I will say, is there. That's around the time that this is. Is there anything that you have upcoming that you want to point folks towards or anything that you'd like to plug?

[Colin Mochrie]

My birthday.

[Aaron Keenan]

Are you a Scorpio?

[Colin Mochrie]

No, I'm a Sagittarius.

[Aaron Keenan]

Oh, even better. November 30th. Do you think your hope's a Sagittarius?

[Colin Mochrie]

You know, we were having coffee the other day, and I said, he loves hoedowns.

[Aaron Keenan]

It makes sense. We all love hoedowns.

[Colin Mochrie]

I don't. What am I doing? I'm doing a. I do a show with a hypnotist where he hypnotizes audience members and I improvise with them.

[Adel]

Oh, wow.

[Colin Mochrie]

So we're in the middle of a tour right now, so I think I'll be in Canada at that point during that. But check hiprov.com, see if we're coming to a town near you.

[JPC]

Wow, that's very cool.

[Adel]

What's been your favorite? What has the person been hypnotized to do or to believe they are? That's been your favorite so far?

[Colin Mochrie]

They, like, we hypnotize. We just hypnotize them to improvise so they become part of our improv troupe. So. But they make the. They truly are just living in the moment. There's no, oh, we'll work towards this ending. This is all they have. There was one I was looking for. I'm a superhero looking for a sidekick. So the hypnotized woman said. I said, what's. What's your power? She said, delayed gratification. So there's a moment also where you think, okay, these people are in a vulnerable state. I don't want to take advantage. So I just said, so say there was a bank robbery happening. What would you do? And she said, I run up to the bank, but I don't go in right away. And I thought, brilliant.

[JPC]

That's very. That's very.

[Aaron Keenan]

That's a miracle.

[Adel]

So hip prov. I assume h y p h Y-P-R-O-V.com oh, man, that sounds outstanding.

[Colin Mochrie]

It's a lot of fun. It's.

[Adel]

It's.

[Colin Mochrie]

It's amazing how to see people improvise when they get out of their way. Yeah, it's that that part of the brain that deals with self criticism is gone. So they just react to everything. The hypnotist. And I say, but if you're listening.

[Aaron Keenan]

To this podcast to do an episode.

[JPC]

Of this continue paying thousands of dollars for classes. Don't. Hypnosis seems fine, but the thousands of dollars of classes, that's where it's at.

[Colin Mochrie]

What I love about both we have hypnotists. People don't believe in hypnotism. We have improv. They don't really believe in that either. So we put these two art forms people don't believe in and put them in one place to save a little time for them.

[JPC]

All the skeptics save them from only.

[Aaron Keenan]

Having to write one Yelp review.

[Colin Mochrie]

Yeah. Love it.

[Adel]

Erin, do you have anything to plug her from?

[Aaron Keenan]

I got nothing. I would say in celebration for this happening, I was watching some whose line best of's on YouTube and I was laughing my ass off. It holds up in a major way. So check those out. Okay, who was your favorite big Ryan fan?

[JPC]

Aaron said Ryan. Aaron said Ryan.

[Aaron Keenan]

You and Ryan together is my favorite. Your chemistry.

[JPC]

Sure.

[Colin Mochrie]

Okay.

[Aaron Keenan]

Said the liar who loves Wayne Brady.

[Colin Mochrie]

Oh, son of a. Okay, all I'm saying is next time you watch the show, watch carefully Brady's wearing an earpiece because I'm telling him what to say.

[Aaron Keenan]

Conspiracy theory confirmed.

[Adel]

First adol. Anything to plug a few things. First and foremost, God, I wish my man Colin Mochrie a happy early birthday.

[Aaron Keenan]

And the pope.

[Adel]

I'm a little surprised Aaron did not. But yeah, that did hurt.

[Colin Mochrie]

I gotta say, Dang it.

[Adel]

And then I gotta say, been a huge fan of whose line is Anyway, Colin's my favorite. Unless I'm watching the British version. And then the guy who played Friar Tuck in the Kevin Costnerago.

[Colin Mochrie]

Mike McShane.

[Adel]

That guy is my favorite.

[Colin Mochrie]

The British version, I mean, everybody's, you know, fine. They all have their fan clubs. They're all lovely. Most, yeah, they're mostly okay. But yeah, they're all fun to work with.

[Adel]

Oh, and the last thing I was going to say was there's still time. It's not the end of November yet. If you haven't watched over the garden wall, it's one of my favorite fall things to do is to watch that. So I would say, check that out. I believe it's on Hulu. Perhaps jpc. Anything to plug or promote or a review to read.

[JPC]

I would like to just wish my child also a happy birthday. My child's birthday is on the 29th of November, so it's so close. So close. And I will say that we were. When my child was who's a year old when they were being born, I was looking at like celebrity birthdays for the days around when they could be born and I saw that Colin's birthday was on the 30th and I thought, oh, that'd be cool. That's a fun. I'm an improviser, you know, that's a cool like legacy. But 29th.

[Colin Mochrie]

Hang on, hang on, kid.

[JPC]

If I'm being honest, the 28th and the 30th had way better options. But 29th we'll take, we'll just. We'll take that. That.

[Colin Mochrie]

Oh, there must be Someone on the 29th.

[JPC]

No, it's really bad. It's a bunch of tiktokers. It's a lot of tiktokers.

[Colin Mochrie]

Wow, Bill Cosby.

[JPC]

Maybe they'll be a tiktoker. Aaron, one last riddle to bring us home. You haven't won any points today.

[Aaron Keenan]

Sure.

[JPC]

I'm in the sky. Way up high. What name does have I?

[Aaron Keenan]

Jupiter. Jupiter. I was gonna let you keep going.

[Adel]

Bye forever.

[JPC]

Created by Adult Refine Starring Aaron Keenan and John Patrick Collins. Casey Toby did the editing Logo created by Emily Cardamus and Emily Napoleon. Hey there King ofs and Six Flags. If you like that, you are gonna love this week's Patreon. It's scenes from a hotel hot tub. You can listen to that plus our entire back catalog at patreon.com. hey Riddler. By joining the clue crew for $5 a month or start your 7 day free trial or the review crew for $8 a month plus you get those ad free episodes podcasts. See you there.

[Aaron Keenan]

That was a headgum podcast.