Highest Self Podcast® — Episode 635

Title: This Is Why You're Unhappy… And How To Change That in 2026 with Rosie Acosta
Host: Sahara Rose
Guest: Rosie Acosta
Release Date: December 30, 2025

Overview

In this deeply honest and wide-ranging conversation, Sahara Rose and her close friend Rosie Acosta investigate the roots of human unhappiness, the existential paradoxes of life, and what it truly means to seek happiness in a modern, spiritual context. With signature humor and authenticity, they share personal stories, philosophical reflections, and actionable insights for anyone struggling with "not enoughness," uncertainty, or the tension between wanting it all and being present. The episode is as much about the freedom to question as about finding practical ways to make peace with being human.

Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. The Existential Paradox of Human Happiness

• Introduction to the Human Condition
  Sahara and Rosie open with playful banter, setting a relatable tone while quickly diving into the central question:
  “Why are humans indefinitely unhappy?” —Sahara Rose (00:48)
• Personal Story as a Microcosm
  Sahara shares her chaotic experience with moving Airbnbs, landing unexpectedly at her grandmother's, reflecting on how disruptions can redirect us to meaningful but fleeting moments.
  She highlights the paradox of always “winning in one thing and losing in another,” emphasizing that happiness often feels out of reach because everything and everyone we love can’t be in one place at one time.

  "Your life can change at any moment." —Sahara Rose (00:08)
  "We always want everything everywhere all at once, but we can’t even have that.” —Sahara Rose (08:11)

2. Mind’s Tendency Toward Dissatisfaction & “Time Hoarding”

• Rosie contextualizes the perpetual feeling of lack as a normal human brain function:

  “Our brain is wired for survival... we were time hoarders.” —Rosie Acosta (11:13)

• She explains Eastern frameworks (like the Yogic Kleshas) as models for why we’re often preoccupied with what's missing instead of being present.

3. The Pain & Beauty of Impermanence

• Sahara’s emotional reflection on generational loss and gratitude for family time underscores the preciousness of the present:

  “There’s a heartbreak in everything ends... there’s no experience you will ever have again. Not one.” —Sahara Rose (17:51)

• The universal experience of grief, especially as we age and confront mortality within our families, is both a source of suffering and a call to create new life and meaning.

  “To love is to suffer.” —(recalling a past conversation, 22:28)

4. Making Peace with the Unresolvable

• The hosts discuss “holding paradox” — being grateful and frustrated simultaneously.

  “As humans, we are capable of holding paradox... You can practice gratitude and also be frustrated.” —Rosie Acosta (30:50)

• The example of weddings illustrates how even the closest we come to having “everything all at once” is overwhelming and fleeting.

5. The Shadow of Spiritual Seeking & Pathways

• Sahara discusses the dual edge of perpetual spiritual seeking—its power to drive growth and its shadow in never feeling satisfied:

  "The beauty of that is you keep getting better. And the shadow of that is you’re never happy about it as it is." —Sahara Rose (34:16)

• Both acknowledge that peak experiences come at a cost—exhaustion, disruption, and missing out on stability.
• Rosie contextualizes that behind every “highlight” are the “lows” and challenges most people don’t see. (35:25–36:32)

6. Prioritization & Life Chapters

• Both reflect on life’s chapters—the single years, partnership, adventure, and home—and argue that making peace with priorities (and their costs) is essential.

7. The Pain & Process of Wanting Partnership

• Sahara vulnerably discusses her own journey with singlehood and her shifting relationship to romance, longing, and neutrality:

  "Your life can change at any moment... but the heart wants to go all in." —Sahara Rose (43:02)

• They compare waiting for partnership to years of preparation for a vocation:

  "Beautiful things take time and I'm willing to wait." —Sahara Rose (46:43) “I’m so grateful I never got what I always wanted... I’d rather it be the good thing that’s worth the wait.” —Rosie Acosta (46:43)

8. The Comfort (and Limit) of Life Stories & Spiritual Narratives

• Deep dive into how religion, spirituality, and even nihilism are frameworks we choose to make meaning out of uncertainty:

  "We're making up relationships, we're making up school, we're making up religion. Everything is made up to give us the sense of control." —Sahara Rose (48:58)

• Sahara notes the contemporary trend of spiritual seekers returning to traditional religious frameworks and the risks of binary thinking.

9. Radical Acceptance & Personal Practice

• Both hosts emphasize the necessity but challenge of embracing uncertainty, presence, and letting go.

  "We can create the things that we desire and we must accept the things that we do not." —Sahara Rose (61:16)

• They joke about founding their own “religion”:

  “Choose discomfort, find happiness.” —Rosie Acosta (61:30) “Someone who can sit with discomfort...that is going to be the indicator of whether they cheat, have addictions, or abandon.” —Sahara Rose (61:41)

10. The Value of Fun and Joy

• Sahara shares that orienting life around fun—rather than ticking boxes—brings natural presence, connection, and gratitude:

  “The meaning of life is to have fun.” —as told by Sahara’s teacher’s grandson (66:56) "I've oriented my life around having fun... because I know I'm not gonna be here for long and none of us are." —Sahara Rose (67:13)

Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• [08:11] "We want all of our friends, all of our family, in the place that we love, all at once. So I don’t have to pick or choose." —Sahara Rose
• [11:13] "Our brain is wired for survival... We were time hoarders." —Rosie Acosta
• [17:51] "There’s no experience you will ever have again. Not one. We’ll never be in this conversation again." —Sahara Rose
• [30:50] “As humans, we are capable of holding paradox... You can absolutely be grateful, practice gratitude, and also be frustrated.” —Rosie Acosta
• [35:25] "Those peak experiences... come at an expense. People don’t get to see the behind the scenes.” —Rosie Acosta
• [46:43] "Beautiful things take time and I'm willing to wait." —Sahara Rose
• [53:08] “I want the truth... Show me the heartbreak. I want to witness the grief. Show it to me as raw as you can. Because to me, that's the baseline that establishes my faith." —Rosie Acosta
• [66:56] "The meaning of life is to have fun." —Sahara Rose, quoting her teacher’s grandson

Timestamps for Key Segments

• 00:48 — 03:20: Playful opening, setting up the existential theme
• 04:44 — 10:17: Sahara’s personal Airbnb crisis and moving to her grandmother’s; reflections on impermanence
• 11:13 — 17:42: Rosie’s neuropsychological framing; Eastern philosophy (Kleshas) and non-attachment
• 17:42 — 24:50: Emotional depth on family, grief, and the reality of loss
• 30:50 — 36:32: Paradox of gratitude and frustration, weddings as a metaphor, costs of peak experiences
• 39:22 — 46:43: Partnership, patience, and preparation for deep relationships
• 48:51 — 61:16: Competing life narratives, meaning-making, spiritual frameworks, and radical acceptance
• 66:56 — 69:23: Meaning of life as fun, final takeaways, the importance of joy

Conclusion & Takeaways

• Happiness is hard because the human mind is always aware of what's missing, and life is inherently impermanent.
• Gratitude, presence, and embracing paradox are key—but so is making peace with uncertainty.
• Peak experiences and deep relationships require sacrifice; prioritize, but know each choice has a cost.
• No spiritual narrative or religion has all the answers—pick the stories that give your life the most resonance and meaning.
• Fun, novelty, and genuine connection are more sustaining than any accomplishment.

“We can create the things that we desire and we must accept the things that we do not. Period. That's my new religion.”
—Sahara Rose (61:16)

For more, follow Sahara at @iamsahararose and Rosie at @rosieacosta. Dive deeper with Sahara’s courses and books at iamsahararose.com.