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Highest Self Podcast®
641: How To Connect To Your Divine Feminine Through Ancient Tantra with Chandresh Bhardwaj
01:18:29
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- [00:00]
Chandresh
There's a lot of subconscious messaging hidden in religion to create that control in women. In Tantra, the patriarchy melts in front of goddesses.
- [00:10]
Sahara Rose
So let's start with the different deities.
- [00:13]
Chandresh
In Tantra, Goddess Kali always is the umbrella. Goddess Kali is Ma. She can create, she can destroy. Through her, everything expands. Lalitha, she was called the goddess only for the kings. She really brings out the best in you, but she has to be combined with Kali. And these goddesses do amplify our O, the prana, the life force in us.
- [00:34]
Sahara Rose
You can't get my Lolita if you can't handle my Kali. Okay, this might take us on a sideline. I do want to get to the rest, but I need to ask this question. Welcome back to the Highest Self podcast. My name is Sahara Rose, and on this podcast I love to talk about spirituality, matters of the heart, ancient wisdom. But make it modern, grounded, fun and relatable so it can actually serve your needs. So when I have guests here on the podcast, you know, I'm not just bringing in anyone. I'm bringing in my personal besties, teachers, people who have changed my life. And today's episode. Wow. Like with Soul Soul Fam. That will soon become yours. So I met the guest Chandresh 9 years ago now, and we have been friends since. And we were first connected from my bestie, Rosie, who you've seen here on the podcast since then have just been on this journey of debts and rebirths and awakenings. And, you know, he's the person that, when I'm like, why are men like this? And he's like, listens to every part and gives feedback, which is very, very interesting from a man these days, is. So I'm excited to dive into what Tantra is. He is an 8th generation tantric guru, so it really runs deep in his lineage. He's from Dharamshala, India. But more than that, he is a mirror. He really is here to show you the parts of yourself that you may not have been looking at, but really bringing in this. This ancient lens to it. And you might have already seen his Instagram before. I feel like his quotes go viral all the time. His Instagram is CB Meditates and I will link it. So today I wanted to talk about the different feminine archetypes in Tantra and how they come alive and how we can see ourselves in them. Because as we know, the path of the feminine is not one thing. It's not your masculine, your feminine, it's one or the other. But the feminine, she's Strong, she's soft, she's wild, she's dark, she's mystical. She's the mother, she's the death. She's everything in between. And as I'm writing my book about the different sacred feminine initiations, I love to learn about different lineages and what are their archetypes, what are the patterns they have seen on a woman's journey? And Tantra has informed me of so much in my own path. And he'll be sharing, first of all, what this ancient science is and how we can bring it to life. And I'll be asking about real life examples that I know I, and likely you have gone through. So we can take these teachings and not just know about it mentally, but actually embody them in our lives before we drop in. Darling, it would mean the world to me if you would subscribe, because I've noticed that over 50% of you who are watching it on YouTube, Spotify are not yet subscribed. So this allows you to stay in the flow for future conversations. Maybe get a fun little British accent from me. How am I doing? And it also supports this podcast, which I love to continue to make free for you. So wherever you're listening to this, be sure to hit subscribe. And let's get into this episode. So without further ado, let's welcome Chandresh here on High Self Podcast.
- [03:57]
Chandresh
Welcome. Thank you. I feel so flattered. This was such a warm welcome to the podcast. This feels like a home, honestly. Yeah. Thank you for having me.
- [04:06]
Sahara Rose
Oh, my goodness. So I'm always. We're always talking. So let's start with, like, one of our recent conversations we had around containment. Before we get into the feminine, let's talk about the masculine. And I. I sent you this voice note while I was in Amsterdam recently, and I was like, chandra, the thing the feminine really wants, if I'm gonna say it, it's not the penetration. Right. I feel like we talk a lot about, like, the masculine is this penetrative energy, but I feel like life is penetrating us all the time. Buy this, do that. Look at this care. You didn't repost this Pen. Pentreat. Penetrate. Penetrate. It's like energetic faces everywhere. And it's like what we really desire as the feminine is a place that we can just relax, that we can soften, that we can be held, and that's that energy of containment. So can you share a little bit of that Shiva energy with us?
- [04:56]
Chandresh
I'm so glad we are starting with that, because the moment you were talking, there was one Visual showing up. In my mind, it's a very popular image of Kali dancing. And Shiva is on the ground and she's putting her feet on his heart, right? That is the classic embodiment of containment by a masculine. And there are many stories behind that moment, right? But the story that I mostly refer to Kali was in her wild, fierce, ferocious energy. You know, that's her default state, in her wildness. And no one was able to stop her. And it's also, I personally feel disrespectful to interrupt that flow of feminine when she's in her rage. First of all, we have been so unfair to the feminine. We have suppressed them, controlled them, manipulated them for hundreds of years. And now, when that volcano is erupting, to tell them, calm down, relax. You're being too much. That not only feels unfair, it's criminal. We are responsible for manipulating them now. We should be responsible for releasing that. That box and let them. Let them breathe. Let them bloom. And that breathing is not going to be a bed of roses, not like a soft hum. It's going to be intense. And one thing that masculine can do is not teach her or preach her in that moment, but allow her to melt. Allow her to just be safe. What Shiva was doing in that moment, I hold you. I hold space for you. You can dance, you can cry, you can breathe, you can blow fire from your mouth. I'm not going to judge you. I'm not going to tell you, calm down. But when Shiva does that with so much care and love, imagine we are talking about Shiva, who's known as the God, the adiyogi, the first guru, first teacher, God of the gods. When God of the gods, he could do anything, but he chose to be the soft container. Soft enough to give her love, but also strong enough to contain her fierceness. And he was able to do so because there was no ego involved. What we are dealing with nowadays is too much of ego. I, me and myself, I'm a man. I can do this, or she said this in front of my family, in front of my friends, or on social media. Now the ego is coming out. It takes that Shiva embodiment, that rooted masculine to surrender and to tell her that I honor you. You could be in your wildness, you could be in your gentle, playful, inner child energy. I hold space for you in both containers.
- [07:34]
Sahara Rose
And here's the thing. The feminine, we will subconsciously test our safety with someone. So oftentimes, when a woman is going into that nervous system state where she may be experiencing rage or fear, of the unsafety of the relationship, fear of being abandoned, fear of, you know, not feeling fully met. It's her to kind of test like, will you be able to hold me in this?
- [08:03]
Chandresh
Yeah.
- [08:04]
Sahara Rose
And I feel most men, they don't understand this. They think I'm being criticized. And then they're that wall, that ego goes up. And then so then the feminine feels like, oh, see, I'm not safe because I just showed a little bit and he backed away. So I am not safe here. And then she goes into her kind of like passive aggressive shell where she's there, but she doesn't really respect you anymore. And it's interesting because if that man actually just, he doesn't need to fix. He doesn't need to have a response. Just witnessed, just witnessed her and was like, and I'm not going anywhere. That would allow her to soften into that version of her that both he and she deeply wants. When a woman is in a relationship where she is held, she becomes that sweet honey softness it's oozing out of her. She amazes herself with like the levels of devotion that are within her because we also carry that, like that Sita energy, that like pure Radha, that devotional love. But most of us, we never get to meet her because we've never been given the safety to get there.
- [09:16]
Chandresh
I think the critical point here is when she's asking for depth, the man sees it as a criticism, or she criticized me. Am I not good enough? Am I not? That's how the male ego starts to talk. Am I not good enough? Am I not being macho enough? Or is something wrong with me? Or is she trying to compare me with one of her male friends? God knows what's happening in that, you know, male mindset. Because men have been carrying the pressure of being in some sort of alpha state created by society, created by media. So they feel, oh, am I not living up to that macho state? So they do not see her longing for depth as guidance. They see her longing for depth as a critical voice. But through lens of tantra, what's happening here is the Devi is just guiding you, inviting you to play, inviting you to just move forward with softness, but also that inner strength. You mentioned Radha, you mentioned Sita. They all were such strong women and yet so soft. And Krishna followed Radha. Krishna honored Radha, Ram honored Sita. And fun fact here. You know Radha, right? If you reverse the name Radha, it becomes Dhara in Sanskrit. And know what dhara means? Flow, flow of river. So my tantric mind says, and I've heard that from teachers. The reason Radha is called Radha, because when you reverse it, it becomes Dhara flow. And when Dhara becomes Ra, that means the flow is going within. So you. You're breathing that flow within. It's. It's the whole Tantric transmutation happening. And Radha symbolizes that. I feel there are so many stunning, beautiful stories in the Eastern traditions. You could sit with Radha for next six hours and talk about her. It's fascinating. Yeah.
- [11:10]
Sahara Rose
So let's start with the different deities in Tantra. So first of all, what is tantra and how is it different than Hinduism? Because we mentioned some Hindu goddesses or really like Vedic adapted to Hinduism. Like, give. Give us a little bit of history on this.
- [11:27]
Chandresh
So what is tantra? Tantra is science of self awareness, simple words. The way I see Tantra is, you know, let's say we are in a kitchen. There are.
- [11:38]
Sahara Rose
So it's not just like sexual orgies everywhere. What?
- [11:41]
Chandresh
Right. I know. I'm just disappointing everyone right now.
- [11:44]
Sahara Rose
Dammit. We watched that movie. We thought it was that.
- [11:48]
Chandresh
Right? I remember I was in a podcast and I said, tantra is not sex. And I remember the host, there were more than one host. And one host was so angry because they really wanted me to talk about tantra sex. But sex is part of.
- [12:02]
Sahara Rose
And people who are like, what are the tantra translation? Tantra. We're gonna go back to tantra, okay?
- [12:09]
Chandresh
And you know, it's important to understand what the word means. Forget the spiritual context. Tantra means technology, science. Right now, the listeners are hearing this podcast through a tantra. That's Internet phone, the whole podcast app, that is tantra. What they're holding in the hand, the phone, that's yantra means device. So yantra is also part of that. What we are saying is mantra, right? Language, vibration, sound, rhythm. So tantra was this open, vast, interesting umbrella playground of spirituality. It has space for everyone. Tantra says, come as you are. You are angry, you are violent, you are greedy, you are full of lust. You don't need to stop. All that will transmute it. You do not need to become some sort of pure embodiment of morality to become a tantra student. We'll transmute this. Do not suppress what you're going through. Let's transmute what's happening. And this is the blessing and curse of Tantra. Because there is so much freedom with tantra, like with religions with Hinduism, there are people who would discipline you. This is not Hinduism. Stop doing it. With tantra, you don't see that it's a science that was so vast and so deep and so playful, that sort of became its curse also. So then people started to pick, you know, pieces.
- [13:31]
Sahara Rose
So what. What is Hinduism, then?
- [13:33]
Chandresh
Hinduism, Ideally, it's known as a religion, but if you ask me, it's a way of life. It's a way of living. It's a sanatasin dharma, sanatan dharma. It's a way of living.
- [13:44]
Sahara Rose
And what does sanatasand dharma mean?
- [13:45]
Chandresh
Sanatana means, you know, the one who's eternal. It's being. From day one, if you go. I'm not the best history student, but if you go deeper into the origin of the name Hindu or Hinduism, you notice that's more like a geographical identity. You know, it's not. So religion, like Buddha, I'm sure, didn't want to create ism out of his teachings. The moment something becomes an ism, it starts to change. Manipulation, control.
- [14:14]
Sahara Rose
Comes from Indus river valley.
- [14:16]
Chandresh
Exactly. Hindu. Indus. Right. I have an aunt. Her name is Indu, and she says a lot of people call her Hindu because, you know, it sounds like that. So, yeah, the point is the way Hinduism, or pretty much that's happening everywhere with polarity. The way Hinduism has become now, the way it's treated, it's not that restricted. It's actually very vast. It's very playful. It accepts everyone. Sanatana dharma, or that eternal embodiment welcomes you as you are. But the main difference between tantra and sanatan dharam, or Hinduism is the way we treat our all senses, sexuality, especially sexuality, anger, greed, the way we approach God divine. In tantra, it's more like a direct talk. In Hinduism, it's more ritualistic in a way, through prayer, through typical religious setup.
- [15:11]
Sahara Rose
If you've gone through a breakup, a heartbreak, a divorce, or another dark night of the soul, I want to tell you congratulations, because the best is yet to come. If I've learned anything about the Sacred Feminine journey is it begins with a rupture. That's when you meet the snake, the shadow, the thing that you didn't want to see, and you start walking the path of the rose, trusting the unfolding of your life, allowing the synchronicities to guide you that take you places that you could have never imagined before. If you're feeling me, you're feeling this message deep in your bones, then I invite you to join the sacred feminine pathway. This is where I guide you step by step in this journey. I share what sacred feminine spirituality is all about and how it's different than the masculine path that we're taught, which is just seated meditations and trying to, you know, persevere and push our bodies through cold plunges and breath flow, work. Whereas the feminine path is all about embodiment, beauty, joy, dance, singing, music, art, creativity. I talk about how to alchemize our dark night of the soul, how to move through those shadows and blossom as an even more embodied and beautiful iteration of ourselves on the other side. Because I know these obstacles are actually quantum leaps into new timelines. Sacred feminine Pathway is now available for an opening price of three. Just $27. That's right, only $27, which is less than a meal out. You can head over to the show notes to get it right away. And I can't wait to invite you inside. I see tantras, you know that definition of to weave? To weave, to be with.
- [16:41]
Chandresh
Yeah.
- [16:41]
Sahara Rose
Which is really that path of embodiment. To be with the pain, the suffering and the desire. Rather than pray to it, wish for it, you know, turn it into something outside of yourself. And I also see Tantra as like accepting the shadow as well as the light. And also the householder path.
- [17:03]
Chandresh
Exactly.
- [17:04]
Sahara Rose
To be able to have children, to have family, to have money. Whereas that strict yogic path was more that path of the aesthetic who goes to the mountains, the renunciate, which is a path. But I see Tantra has much more. It's more useful how we live for today.
- [17:23]
Chandresh
Tantra has different sects within. Like there is an Aghori sect. Ghoris are very rebellious, unconventional tantric teachers. You will never see them out in the public. They wear black clothes, long beard, may never even take shower because they live in jungles all the time. They eat anything and everything. They look a little scary to the common public. But their theory is everything is pure. It's all pure consciousness. So why are you. If you cannot see Kali in this filth of dirt or garb, which you cannot see Kali in the temple also, which I relate to very strongly, if I do not see presence of Kali in you, in me, in the person helping us, or on the homeless, then my idea of Kali is messed up. Because if I'm restricting her to just a fancy temple, one of the core difference between Hindu religion and Tantra would be the freedom it grants you. There is less constitution in Tantra and there is more guidelines in a religion. Obviously, the goddesses look different, behave different in religion. There's more patriarchal impact in a religion. Obviously in Tantra, the patriarchy follows, melts in Front of goddesses.
- [18:38]
Sahara Rose
So let's dive into these 10 feminine archetypes in Tantra. Please start with Kali.
- [18:44]
Chandresh
Let's begin. Right, just for the audience, what Sahara is mentioning right now is what we call Das Mahavidya. Das means 10. Mahavidya means the prime goddesses, the prime forces. And Goddess Kali always is the umbrella goddess. I call her the Mama Goddess for this reason, because through her, everything expands. And this was a very interesting imagination and teaching structure of the Tantriks to create a goddess or to invite that particular goddess energy that serves every sect of the woman in society. Because if you notice, there is no religion or philosophy since the ancient times that cater to women. They actually bypass women as if it doesn't even matter. So Tantra created all these archetypes so that you invite energy in whatever state of life you are in. And this is how it started to become thus Mahavidya. And then there's 11th one, which I'll mention, which was, you know, she was never part of that 10 mahavidyas, but she became part of it simply because of her energy and how she became so relevant to the modern woman also. So shall we begin with one by one? Right. Okay. One would be, of course, Kali number one. And I think our every podcast has deep Kali conversation, because I think everyone embodies Kali. I'm assuming everyone who listens to you, at least 50% of them already know about Kali because she's such a relevant modern feminist icon right now, Effy, and.
- [20:23]
Sahara Rose
I feel like she's misunderstood. You remember, I was, like, afraid of Kali for a moment because it. There was, like, a disruptive energy in my life. And. And even back then, this was like, yeah, maybe seven years ago or so, I loved Saraswati. You know, creativity like that to me, that felt very resonant for me. But Kali, when I would see her, you know, I saw the beauty in her, but it didn't feel like that was me. And it was really only until my divorce that when I was thrown into the abyss of the darkness where I had no choice but to surrender, I was like, oh, golly. And I noticed that the more I allowed myself to be in that abyss, in that darkness, the more magical my life would become.
- [21:15]
Chandresh
Yeah.
- [21:15]
Sahara Rose
And then I would go places I would have never imagined before and think of things I never thought about before and become versions of myself I could have never before. And that was all. Through the darkness. Through the darkness. It's the only way. Through the death. You need to allow the old versions of yourself to die for the new versions of you to be born. And that is only through Kali Ma. And so that made me become a Kali devotee. And since then, like, I thank the darkness every single day. Thank you to the womb of pure potentiality where it's all created from. Thank you to the deaths, because we wouldn't have the rebirth. Thank you for those periods of uncertainty, because thank God, I'm no longer certain about what's no longer serving me. And that is. And so when you realize that anything that is ever burned down needed to be. And then you're like, kalima, show me if there's anything else. If there's still any other threads of deceit in my life, threads of just. Not even just deceit, but full integrity. If there's something I'm doing that's a micro lie that I'm gonna eventually find out eventually, show me now. And I feel like that's when you really become fearless on the spiritual path, when you're no longer like, well, I'm here to feel good. No, it's not about feeling good. It's about truth, because truth is eternal. Emotions are. Are momentary. I don't want an illusion that feels good. I could go into the matrix for that. Yeah, I don't want the matrix. And that's the thing with Kali. It's like looking at the ugliness eye to eye, looking at the thing you really don't want to see. Like, something I do for myself is I do an integrity inventory on myself every day. So before I sleep, what are even, like, little micro lies I told myself today or things that I went along with, but I didn't really want just to be honest with myself. And I've noticed just the things faster I get honest with myself of the thing of, like, just a small example of just one. Today I'm looking for an apartment here, and I asked some of my friends, like, two of my best friends, they live in Venice. And they were like. I was like, do you think I should live in Venice? Do you think I should live in Marina? They're like, venice, it's the place to be. And because I love these friends and I want to be near these friends, I kind of convinced myself, yeah, I'm going to live in Venice now. Like, that's going to be my new chapter, and that's going to feel right. And I went to an apartment in Venice, and I was, like, ready to sign the application, and I took a shower. And it was just in that moment of being alone with myself, no outside voice, no friends. No mom who's like, there's only one apartment left. Sign the application. Do the thing. In that moment of me with me, I was like, if I'm really being honest with myself right now, I don't like living in chaotic places. I don't like having, like, stores downstairs. Like, that is not for me. And then that honesty prevented me from a whole timeline of one year that I would have gone into that I would have kept convincing myself I'm okay with. And so, Kali, show me sooner than later, because every moment spent in deception is a moment that I'm not spending in truth.
- [24:23]
Chandresh
Exactly. And this is becoming a huge problem in this age of social media. Every. You may be not that unhappy with your job or relationship, but when you keep listening to a certain voice on social media, you start hating everything or you start choosing everything, everything simply because the algorithm is showing you one thing. Or friends, family, they have a certain opinion. But this is where the Sadhana, the Kali Sadhana. Sadhana is the disciplined meditation practice. This is where meditations on these goddesses become so potent, they detach you from unnecessary external noise. And every external noise is unnecessary because while others may have the best intention for you, but you are here to fulfill a certain purpose, a certain dhar, who knows better than you. You have a tattoo of Dharma, so you know you are not here randomly. And you have to. I also want to, you know, point to one thing. People do get scared of Kali's appearance. So before we dive into even all the ten goddesses, the way I define a goddess or Devi is through consciousness. So when you dig deeper into these Tantric scriptures, you notice every Tantric had a certain vision of the Goddess. Kali appeared as ferocious energy that can kill all the enemies. To some, like kings used to meditate on Kali for the same reason illegal elements in those days, in ancient times, the one who were always, you know, looting people and everything, they used to meditate on Kali also. But their purpose was keep the police away, keep the legal system away. So Kali would help everyone. And you have to understand these Tantric seeker students, they invited the consciousness like water, and then you mix anything in it, it becomes yours. Kali is that fluid energy. It becomes yours in any of your energy. That's her generosity. And that why that one picture of her with skulls, blood and everything became popular? Because the symbolism is this is maa kaali and maa Kali mother has permission to create you, but to also destroy what's not serving you. Do you trust Ma? And if you don't, then wait. The Party hasn't started yet. Then you have to wait.
- [26:48]
Sahara Rose
Life will show you one.
- [26:49]
Chandresh
Yeah.
- [26:50]
Sahara Rose
I feel when you are in a situation, life, where there's nothing you can do, in your control, that's when you put your hands up and you surrender. And that's when Kali comes through. That's when you're like, kali. Clearly, the former way of how I was operating is no longer working. And so show me what I don't know.
- [27:14]
Chandresh
And the funny thing is, we actually do not have control over anything. Like, we don't know what's going to happen in 30 minutes from now, tomorrow morning, next year. We don't know. But we think we have control. We live in that illusion. And this is why, I guess, Kali is known as the destroyer of illusions. The first illusion she destroys is, no, you don't have control. So let go of that illusion and let me help you. And it's messy in the beginning, it's detox, and then it gets better.
- [27:44]
Sahara Rose
And like, a friend of mine, she. She was single for a long time. She just got into a relationship. And I'm. I'm so happy for her. And she called me today, and she's like, I'm just terrified, you know, what if this doesn't work out? What if he abandons me? What if, you know, all. All the fears? Yeah, I feel that's really when the energy of Kali, you know, I was like. And so it's okay. Maybe you date for six months and he's not it, and you learned, and then there's something else better for you. And when you can make friends with Kali, she's like, well, the thought of that scares me so much. It's like, well, the truth is, even if you don't think about it, it can still happen. And so that's the thing we try to say, well, is this forever? I need to know if this is forever. Even if someone tells you, yes, this is forever, it doesn't mean it's forever. If so, there would be no such thing as divorce. A lot of people say forever. It doesn't mean it's forever. So just make friends with the not knowing the happiest Like a friend of mine. These two friends of mine, they're in a relationship, and I asked them. They've been together for eight years. I'm like, so. But they're not married. They don't have kids. I'm like, so, are you guys gonna get married? I asked them. I was like, do you guys want to be together forever? And they looked at each other like, Almost like. Like, yeah. Do you think we're gonna be together forever? I don't know. I sure hope so. No attachment to it. And that's why the relationship I feel is so solid, of if you, for whatever reason, don't want to be in this, I wish the best for you rather than this. No, no, no, no. It needs to be for forever. Otherwise my nervous system can't satiate. That person might just tell you in that moment, yes, this is forever. They don't freaking know. And then you're gonna feel that heartbreak, that disappointment of, I thought this was forever and it's not. Instead, just be open to the unknown. It's now. And as long as it's now, it's forever. Because it's only in this moment. And as long as that moment continues. And if not, Kali will provide you with something else.
- [29:41]
Chandresh
You know, our attachment to permanence is killing our joy, our existence. People are making terrible choices in jobs, relationships, family, simply because they think, oh, it's all going to be permanent. I have a, you know, a mantra that I often write on Instagram. Nothing is permanent. You, me, red roses, love, hate, you know, none of this is permanent. And yet we continue to seek permanence in everything. There's nothing that's going to be permanent. And this is why I feel it should be mandatory to meditate on Kali, on even Buddha, who actually taught us nothing is permanent.
- [30:20]
Sahara Rose
In my song Sexy Dark Night of the Soul, the first line is, look, nothing lasts forever except my swag. So I'd rather be extra than your regular ass.
- [30:29]
Chandresh
And I think I should also announce it here. I did suggest Sahara, two or three more songs. So I hope that that comes out exactly.
- [30:36]
Sahara Rose
Shu. Nothing lasts forever except your swag. That's the one thing you have for the rest of your life. So just do you. Okay, who's the next goddess coming through?
- [30:44]
Chandresh
So, you know, I'm sure sharing it in order of the sort of how I see in the modern day how they relate to. Because women and just human mind, it was so controlled and suppressed for ages. So what brings out your self expression? What gives you the empowerment to speak, to download that truth? That's Matangi. Matangi is the Saraswati on steroids. Saraswati Goddess from Hinduism. You know, I went to Catholic school in India and we used to meditate still on Saraswati because that's her sweetness. You know, even Catholic school will sing prayers for her in the morning because.
- [31:23]
Sahara Rose
Of knowledge, because she's the goddess of knowledge, literature. Sweet goddess of knowledge, music, arts.
- [31:29]
Chandresh
Yeah, Matangi is the goddess of knowledge, of course, creativity, self expression. But for those who, who are ready and willing to speak the rawness, she's not going to be as sweet as Saraswati. After Kali, she was the first goddess that my guru initiated me into. And that happened when he told me so my guru is my father. So he told me, you are living through words, speech, writing. And I'm like, I don't even know how to write proper English or speak, you know, it was, I had just moved to US from India and I said, dad, you don't speak English. I don't speak good English. And you're telling me I'm going to make a living in US through words. And he said, yeah, you will. And he said, you know, and he saw my fair, my defensiveness and he said nothing. He said, start Matangi, Satan. I was like, who is Matangi? I didn't even know about her, you know, at the time. And he of course taught me that. And then I started to meditate on Matangi. And I do give her credit because my life changed after that. What makes Matangi so special? And I think this is if there's one goddess Sahara that I think everyone who's listening got to absorb beyond Kali, that's Matangi. Matangi. You know, stories are so long. But I'm going to give a brief summary of what makes her the powerful goddess in the story is that in ancient times the scholars, the upper, so called upper caste, you know, in the, in ancient India they said, you know, Saraswati belongs to us, the scholars, so all the artists, dancers, creative people because they were never accepted as part of society. They were always, you know, you dance, you write. This is not a profession of reputation. You stay outside the city. And they said if you want to have your temple, because they would not be allowed to in those temples. The king, the scholars, upper caste said, you know, we'll give you a place outside the city where you can build your temple. And they gave them a place where the trash of the city was burned. Graveyard was there, trash, you know, was burning there. But the Tantrik said, you know, we'll take this, we'll invite Matangi here. And the story is that Matangi would come there, it would should open the throat chakra, the energy of people. They became even better singers, even better performers, writers. And that started to create greed in upper caste. Now that, now we want her. But Matangi said, I'll always be the voice of the voiceless. I'll always bring the courage, the rawness, the fierceness in those who have been suppressed and controlled. So she really became the goddess for those who were controlled, who were suppressed. When you look her up online, you see two symbols, very interesting for her. One is pollution, others leftover food. Because these people that I'm talking about, they were not even given proper food. They were like, yeah, you take leftovers or the trash. The whole symbolism of building her temple on where the trash was burning. So she really brought those two symbols. But when you meditate on her, she has a green aura, green lush aura with parrot. Like every God and goddess in Tantra or Hinduism, they have some animal, some bird associated with them. Matangi's bird is parrot, green parrot. And she's someone who'll help you think beyond mind. Because, see, the way we are raised, we speak from what we have learned, information and memory. Matangi puts you in this zone where you start to talk what you haven't learned. It's coming from that cosmic. So one of the works I offer, Cosmic Download, was inspired from my work with Matangi. It's cosmic that's downloading things in you. It's not coming from books.
- [35:22]
Sahara Rose
If you're listening to this podcast, thinking, damn, I wish I had my own. I, this message is for you. Hi, I'm your highest self telling you to start that damn podcast because you are sending 20 minute voice notes to your friends, going through wellness, spirituality, relationships, healing, the state of the world and people get to hear it and receive it because it can help a whole lot of people. But I know, I know, Sahara. I don't know how to get a podcast off the ground. I don't know the tech. I don't know how you get it on your Instagram and these reels and they're edited and then it's on YouTube and it's on Spotify. Like, what is your whole workflow? Practice? How many hours a week does it take? Plus, I have so many different interests, I don't even know what my podcast would be about. If I'm speaking your brain right now, then I got you, girl. So I recently started my 10 person podcast mentorship. It is the most intimate container I have ever coached and I am obsessed with it because I am part the of Arsenal in the Weeds with you. Talking about the name of your podcast, what the image for it will be, giving you time and and some suggestions for your photo shoot. The description of your podcast, whether it will be solo casts or Interviews, giving you time and space every week so you can practice interviewing, practice solo casting, giving feedback. Not just me, but all 10 of us in the container on our Slack channel. Oh, try this, try that. Everything you need, literally my exact workflows that I'm going to be screen sharing with you of how I go from recording my podcast to my team executing and editing and getting it out there and everything that you need and what I would do if I were starting today. I started my podcast nine years ago, so I know a thing or two. I have been consistent. I've never stopped podcasting because it's been very, very easy for me. Very, very fun for me. And hands down, now, the best decision I've ever made. I have made a lot of money, my best friends, incredible contacts. I mean, I get to interview people who I wish I could have a conversation with. From Richard Rudd, the founder of Gene Key, Sadhguru, Deepak Chopra, Don Miguel Ruiz. But most importantly, I found my own voice, my ability to speak in this way without saying ums and likes. Through podcasting, I have found my people, my soul tribe, and the list goes on. I really feel starting a podcast is the best decision I've ever made. And now starting this podcast mentorship is the second because I get to share this gift with other people in this really beautiful and intimate way. And I know that it will change the trajectory of your life should you choose it. So doors are open now for my March cohort. It is only 10 people. First come, first serve. If you're listening to this later, I will still have another cohort in the future. Future. So you can head over to the same website. You can find the link in the Show Notes has all the description of what goes on every single week, how it's laid out. It's all live on Zoom two hours a week. And I am so excited to see you there. So head over to the show Notes to get started and I can't wait to meet you and support you with your podcast. Well, that has been my whole spiritual practice.
- [38:21]
Chandresh
Yeah.
- [38:21]
Sahara Rose
Has been channeling.
- [38:22]
Chandresh
Yeah.
- [38:23]
Sahara Rose
You know, my Ayurveda books, I channeled entirely. I would look out the window, my fingers would be typing. It was like gunas, how they're related to the doshas, the subgunas, like, like all, like very specific Vedic information that I didn't even study in this lifetime that was coming through and connecting the dots in these ways that was being channeled by the divine and I believe part of a past life contract that I had to come here and you know, help bring Ayurveda out to more people. So 100%, I have felt this Matangi energy when I am feeling like my highest self. It is that raw expression and going beyond the words, you know, because I feel words keep us in that information knowledge, that like, more Saraswati energy of like just the difference between information and embodiment.
- [39:07]
Chandresh
Yeah.
- [39:07]
Sahara Rose
I could say exactly everything I said today on my podcast in this voice and it would have been received very differently versus the embodiment of someone who actually has lived them. And I really feel in this world of AI, that is what we're missing because the AI strips us from that. You know, you could put in like a half baked idea and we'll just turn into this formulated, perfect thing that has no soul. And so I feel we really need that Matangi. But let her be messy, let her have typos, let her have run on sentences and not make sense. And you're not really sure if anyone gets. That's it. We are so craving that in today's world.
- [39:54]
Chandresh
Exactly. You channeled Matangi honestly for me, because I know there were. There was a season of your life and Saraswati was your muse.
- [40:02]
Sahara Rose
I didn't know about Matangi until today.
- [40:04]
Chandresh
When you look back now or when I recall those memories, your music, the DJ, the books, it's all Matangi 100%. And we are wearing green today. So we ended up channeling Matangi. That is her color.
- [40:18]
Sahara Rose
I was going to wear white. And then I was just like, you know what? No, I want to wear this.
- [40:21]
Chandresh
It's time to shift to Matangi. Sahara 100. Saraswati is all white.
- [40:26]
Sahara Rose
Well, Mia the artist, I feel like she had an album or something called Matangi.
- [40:33]
Chandresh
You are correct.
- [40:34]
Sahara Rose
When you mentioned to me before the podcast, he was like, I'm talking about Matangi. I was like, is that a South Indian name? Because I was associated with Mia, who Tamil. And so she must have named it after.
- [40:46]
Chandresh
Absolutely. I mean, all goddesses have multiple names, right? But many of these goddesses are much more known in the south of India than North India. North India, because I grew up in North India. So they're more into Durga with the lion or maybe Kali. But I was told as a kid in growing up in that part, don't meditate on Kali. Don't meditate on Hanuman, the monkey God. He was my superhero. They said, oh, they are too strong of forces. Bow down to Saraswati. She keeps you calm and sweet. But yeah, Matangi is needed, especially in the age of AI because AI is turning the brain off for a lot of people. I get messages, sometimes with long messages of love and praise, but they're written on AI. Sometimes they're from four different people, but similar messages. So that's what's happening. Shall we move on to the next one?
- [41:35]
Sahara Rose
Yes. Who's next?
- [41:37]
Chandresh
The way again I'm talking is I want you to feel the journey. Kali is the Mama Goddess. Then she's bringing out your expression. Now Matangi is bringing out the expression, right? When the expression comes out, then there are dormant forces. There are trauma in the family, trauma in the city you live in, the culture you grew up in. All of that starts to come. And there is one very lesser known goddess, but getting very potent and powerful among the seekers in India. Her name is Baglamukhi, not so known in the Western spirituality. Bagla mukhi Bhaglamukhi means the bagla is swan, if I'm able to translate that correctly. Baglamukhi, the one with the tongue of the swan, she's associated with that tongue, energy. Because her symbolism is anytime you get into self negative, self talk in a negative way, anytime you get into self sabotaging, anytime someone else tries to sabotage this growth that's happening through Matangi, through Kali, I'll stop it right away. She's one of the highest and a very serious goddess. She's not for everyone. So I'll mention the Matangi is for everyone. Kali is for everyone. Baglamukhi belongs to those who are initiated, who are going deeper and deeper into sadhana because Baglamukhi is invited when we want things to be stopped. There is a word in tantra called stamban, means stop, just pause there. There are many meditations among ancient tantra teachers. Even the teachers in Germany or osho's times when they used to do this meditation to stop you, whatever you're doing, just pause. It's to just control that inner energy. Baglamukhi is the goddess of that. So it could be you talking negative, someone else throwing negative energy at you, or just unconsciously you are getting into that loop of trauma and fear and anxiety. We invite Baglamukhi, stop all of this. So when we plant intention or vision or goals in life, of course, then you start to sabotage them. Oh, I can't be this, I can't be that. This is where Baglamukhi steps in. It's very important for those who are transitioning into a journey, like really Leaving an old bridge and walking into a new one. Because that's the time when the ghost of the past will come.
- [44:03]
Sahara Rose
She reminds me of a pattern interrupt.
- [44:05]
Chandresh
Yeah.
- [44:06]
Sahara Rose
You know, a line in the sand of this is going to change. I'm going to do something different. It's like, you know those moments in the video game where it's like you were about to do this and you turned and it's interesting. I'm curious. This might take us on a sideline. I do want to get to the rest, but I need to ask this question in Tanta, is there free will or destiny? Are there pattern interrupts where we are creating a new reality of I had a breakup or I decided to move to this country, I'm creating a new life. Are we creating a new timeline or was that already predestined?
- [44:41]
Chandresh
Tantra will say if you do nothing, your destiny will take over. Right? Whatever is written the way you were born in the family. The mind, I mean mind is a software. Mind has already learned. These are my fears, these are my patterns. This is papa's voice, mom's voice, my partner's voice. So mind has already learned a pattern. If you do nothing, that becomes so called destiny and you move on. If you get into path of Tantra, yes, you do get the power of being a conscious choice maker. You start to interrupt. The pattern Tantra doesn't deny the importance of planets or importance of the mind. But it's very clear these are not your decision makers. You get to create your story by your actions.
- [45:27]
Sahara Rose
Got you. So there's a more of a free will perspective.
- [45:30]
Chandresh
100%.
- [45:31]
Sahara Rose
Okay. And who's next?
- [45:34]
Chandresh
So now we are going into pause this. Stop this. The ego will act up. So we invite Chin Mastika Chen. Mastika has a temple in Himachal, part of India near Dalai Lama's town. She's also our Kul Devi means the goddess of our ancestors. She don't freak out if you look her up online. She doesn't have a head.
- [45:58]
Sahara Rose
I have in my oracle card deck, yogic path, there is a Chidamastika.
- [46:02]
Chandresh
I remember that. Why she doesn't have a head? Why the heck it's a headless goddess? Is she lost or scattered? No, she symbolizes no ego. Egolessness. And what is egolessness here? It means I'm not going to be influenced by my fear, by the I, me and myself narrative. We think too much about ourselves, right? We are constantly thinking about, oh, what are people going to think if I do this or if I walk into room. The truth is no one is worrying about you because they're worrying about themselves. And this is where goddesses like chinmastika comes in as a reminder. You might think you matter so much. Relax, you don't. You're a speck of a dust in this collective universe. Not that you are irrelevant, but you're not. The world is not revolving around you. Relax. Let go of the control, let go of the ego. And I'm going to bring some spookiness here because a lot of people who feel they're haunted by evil energy spirits or bad energy, evil eye, bad eye and all that stuff, they meditate a lot on chinmastika because the bad vibes or on extreme level, evil eye and that stuff, they can only haunt you if you are fragile, already scared in the mind. See, if you're walking on the street already scared, someone can simply poke and you'll scream because you're already scared. So these energies, penetrators, when we are already scared and fragile, it's very important to meditate on Chin Mastika, her energy, so that your ego doesn't call the shots, which means your fear doesn't call the shots.
- [47:43]
Sahara Rose
Yeah. One thing, you know, because all spiritual traditions are connected. And so in the plant medicine indigenous path, for me it was the San Pedro was all about just humbling me. And it would say things about me that I didn't want to look at in myself and you know, ways that, you know, you wear makeup because you still care about what people think about you and this and that. And like, it was intense. Right. And hard to hear, but humbling.
- [48:13]
Chandresh
Yeah.
- [48:14]
Sahara Rose
And I feel we need that, especially on a spiritual journey where we can, if we're not checked, we can get into Deluland. We can get into, you know, you see so many spiritual people, people thinking I am the reincarnation of Jesus. And it's like, okay, yes, a lot of us can be. We're all connected to Yeshua energy. But like certain people, like, no, no, no. But it's all me. Like me, so I am Jesus. And it's like, okay, there's a little bit of spiritual narcissism going on. And that spiritual narcissism is a real thing and it's so easy for us to see in other people. But there are little ways we can start to pick it up. Such as going back to our parents house and being like, you've done no healing work. I can't talk to you until you trust me. I did that too, you know, and it's like we've created in spirituality our own religion. And then we're like, oh, you don't follow my religion, but my religion is all about healing. So you're lost and confused. It's literally what Jehovah's Witness does, you know? And so we need to even eradicate our own ego of like, I don't freaking know. We're all just learning these things. It's all stories. And here's the thing. I love learning about deities. I love learning about all mythologies. I'm a priestess, all of it. And sometimes I have to remind myself. And it's all a story. Because when we get so caught up in any story being the truth.
- [49:32]
Chandresh
Yeah.
- [49:33]
Sahara Rose
That's when there's danger, that's when there's attachment. That's when there's dualistic thinking. So take the story, take what serves you. And also know that all of this someone at some point, point made up, you know, and we're all taking what's serving us. And it's really. Even these stories, even these deities, it's us seeing us as a reflection of ourselves.
- [49:55]
Chandresh
Absolutely. I mean, the reason I changed my bio on Instagram to I'm not your guru, I'm your mirror. It's one of the reasons. Because people bring their own labels and projections on me, though. He's a guide, He's a guru. He's this and that.
- [50:08]
Sahara Rose
I mean, everyone wants a good Indian guru.
- [50:09]
Chandresh
I mean, right? Yeah.
- [50:10]
Sahara Rose
Hello.
- [50:12]
Chandresh
So the challenges the head become you. You never know when the head becomes bigger. You know, the ravana in Indian mythology, he's painted as the guy with 10 heads. Means too much of ego. So he needed chinmastika energy. He was a devotee of Shiva.
- [50:31]
Sahara Rose
But the more heads the deity has, the more ego.
- [50:33]
Chandresh
This is true for Ravana. Yeah. And for deities. I don't remember. I don't think deities are shown with heads. They're shown. Shown more with arms.
- [50:41]
Sahara Rose
Like Vishnu has the three heads.
- [50:43]
Chandresh
Yeah, I guess he kind of does.
- [50:44]
Sahara Rose
He's like, I created the whole world.
- [50:47]
Chandresh
Exactly.
- [50:48]
Sahara Rose
Vishnu is less of a super divine energy.
- [50:50]
Chandresh
I don't relate so much with a lot of male deities because I feel a lot of Hindu goddesses or religious goddesses, they're made by men for men, serving men. I mean, there's a popular photo which is worshiped in every other Indian household. Shiva is relaxing and Lakshmi is like massaging his feet. That's a clear message to the woman, you know, honor your husband, you know, when he comes home. And women take pride in that. I'm Just taking care of my husband. This is a picture of Lakshmi and Vishnu. I'm just being Lakshmi, massage, taking care of my husband. So I feel there's a lot of subconscious messaging hidden in religion to create that control in women. That. That does boil my blood. And I think this is why 90% of my content is all about women. Because I grew up seeing Lakshmi give.
- [51:38]
Sahara Rose
Shiva one foot and Shiva give Lakshmi one foot. So there's some equality going on, I think.
- [51:42]
Chandresh
Then they become Bhairava and Bhairavi, you know, in tantva, Right. I mean, we could mention Bhairavi here. Bhairavi is another mahavidya, which is form of Kali, but very playful, very unapologetic, very sexual also. So there are certain tantra goddesses who are. Who honor sexuality. And if there's one goddess that truly embodies sexuality, I'm not using the word sensuality here, just sexual energy. That's Bhairavi.
- [52:12]
Sahara Rose
So shall we go into our next.
- [52:14]
Chandresh
Yeah. And this is Bharavi we are covering. I mean, Barbie simply says, if you're sexual, just be sexual. You know, live that moment of your sexual energy so it doesn't haunt you, so you can transcend it.
- [52:29]
Sahara Rose
So what's the difference between that energy and lust?
- [52:32]
Chandresh
Good question. Lust, in my opinion, is something that I may not have for a person. It's just for anyone. Lust could be toward any person out there. It's lust, right? So anyone who's available to me, I can fulfill my lust with that. Or even if no person is there, I can still fulfill my lust. But sexual energy, that's very pure, that's origining from passion, love. It can help you experience that godliness.
- [53:04]
Sahara Rose
So this Bharvi energy is more around like someone you are attracted to. And following that versus like, I'm just turned on and I just want to be with anyone.
- [53:15]
Chandresh
No, this would be. I mean, there are many stories where Shiva is meditating, right? He's in the Bhairava energy. He's embodying this rooted masculine meditativeness. And then Bhairavi comes and he was.
- [53:26]
Sahara Rose
Turned on in his meditation.
- [53:28]
Chandresh
No. So the job of Bharavi was to seduce him. Really? You know, so the story is when, first of all, it's impossible to wake up Shiva from his sadhana, right? But this is why the goddess takes on the Bhairavi embodiment. You know, I'm going to seduce him. I'm going to really invite him as a lover. And the story is when Shiva wakes up and he sees this beautiful, gorgeous, seductive goddess, Dancing for him, giving herself to him. And when they make love, even when the gods come, Bhairav and Bhairav, we have no clue who's there. So the story is the gods would get pissed off that we are gods and this is sort of disrespectful. They're making love as if they are two animals because they don't even know the rest of the world exists. But that's the message that Tantra teaches. When you experience something, experience it so deeply that you actually do forget something else exists. When you dance, become the dance, forget the dancer. When you love, be so possessed with love that you forget anything else exists. But the problem is what's happening nowadays. When you make love to someone, you are thinking of four other options. Sometimes you don't get your grocery shopping list. Exactly, exactly. Sometimes you don't get turned on. You start to imagine things. And Tantra says, no, don't do that and agree.
- [54:52]
Sahara Rose
I mean so many people are fantasizing about someone else or something that they don't want to say out loud.
- [54:59]
Chandresh
Yeah.
- [55:00]
Sahara Rose
And a lot of people are just disassociated. Doing it out of routine. Feeling like, okay, we're in a relationship, it's been a long time, so I just should.
- [55:07]
Chandresh
It's calendar thing.
- [55:09]
Sahara Rose
Yeah, exactly. And so I feel like this energy is like. Like it's divine to feel that passionate love, but then just bringing it into this modern life. Let's say someone is in a long term relationship and they're not feeling that way. How can you bring forth that energy?
- [55:27]
Chandresh
I think like Rumi said, the goal isn't to find love, it's to address the barriers. So if they're not feeling that in a long term relationship, which is very natural, right? Yes. The mystery is gone. First of all the longing, yearning, mystery, everything is gone. You have seen this person naked hundred times. Emotionally, also not just physically. So there is no mystery. The thing would be to invite the mystery back. How do you create the mystery? First you create it in yourself. If you don't find yourself sensual, other person will not find you sensual. So choosing like get back to that whole first date mindset. Choose dresses, clothes, perfumes that make you look. Feel attractive. Not for him or her, for yourself. That's battery energy, Effy.
- [56:15]
Sahara Rose
Yeah. Finding what turns you on in life, like dancing, like that's. I feel like the. For the feminine, dancing is the thing that connects us to that. Like more sensual energy. And then that's bringing forth a new energy into the relationship which is bringing a mystery of who is that? Who is appearing?
- [56:34]
Chandresh
Yeah. And also I must mention, do not see it as some sort of nine step or three step thing. I'll do this next weekend. It will happen. It has to be lifestyle. If you're doing it to attract someone, it won't last for too long. For obvious reasons. Right? Because you're doing it for someone. Tantra says you embody. It's a radical embodiment. You embody that playfulness. Bhairavi is also known as that playfulness of a little child. That children play for themselves. Not to prove anything. They're not corrupted by society or school yet. So they're just playing because play is so fun. When they get in school, then they know the competition. I have to beat this person. I have to be the first one in school because mom will like me, dad will praise me, teachers will give me more attention. That's when the corruption happens. Bharui brings you to the most tender, raw playfulness in you. We all carry this Bhairava and Bhairavi energy. It's ferocious. It's. It's really that energy that doesn't care about public approval.
- [57:39]
Sahara Rose
I love it. So who is next?
- [57:41]
Chandresh
I want to bring in because Bhairavi is so intensely beautiful. I want to bring something tender. Which is Bhuvaneshwari the most, I think the sweetest one among the tender prime goddesses. Bhuvaneshwari means goddess of earth. You know Pachamama, right? The one who's related to earth. The wild feminine I feel really arises from there. You know, the ocean, mountains, leaves, flowers. Tantra has a lot to do with and it does give huge importance to Sthan Devta means the energy of the place. So this place has its own energy. When I recorded podcast at your place, we were talking about it. That energy was you 247 there. So that energy was different. This is different. Somewhere else will be different. Every place has its energy. And Bhuvaneshwari simply teaches us, guides us to honor the land you are in. Because you will be haunted by the spirits, energy who live there. Or maybe blessed by them and. But you have to build a relationship with them. So when you check in in a new Airbnb hotel, when you travel, or even when you buy a house or a new apartment, honor the energy of the place. Candle, sage, incense. Brian Johnson will not like that. But do it once in a while. Red roses thank the energy of the place. Because no one likes when someone new comes in. Even if you watch a movie in theater, someone sits next to you. You are annoyed but you both have bought the tickets, and yet you are annoyed. So the energy that's already there, they may not like it. You suddenly choose to make this your home. But if you honor the Bhu, the land, things are much better. Every business you open, every podcast, you do honor the Bhu Devi, the mother earth.
- [59:34]
Sahara Rose
I have her in my yogic path deck as well. I'll link that. I have an oracle card deck, guys, using a lot of Hindu, Vedic, tantric goddesses, as well as chakras, Ayurveda. So I'll link that and I. It's one of my favorite cards, and it reminds me of the kapha energy. That kapha is the dosha of the earth. Softness, sweetness, life, sustenance. Ojas.
- [59:56]
Chandresh
Yeah, ojas. I was thinking of ojas today for some reason.
- [60:01]
Sahara Rose
Ojas is that feeling of, like, healthiness or like, when you see a baby, it's so. It's so healthy, it's alive trees, you know, that energy of glow is ojas.
- [60:13]
Chandresh
Exactly. And these goddesses do amplify our ojas, the prana, the life force in us. Shall we move on to the next one? Right, I want to bring in, because this one is the surprise package of the Das Mahavidya, because as I said in the beginning, this particular goddess was not part of Dasma Vidya, but she has turned out to be honestly, one of the most powerful, potent goddess for very right reasons. Her name is Kamakhya, the Yoni goddess. You know, I hesitated to talk about it for a long time because I offer, for obvious reasons, a man talking about yoni energy. I owe so much to her. The way I relate to women, the way I talk about feminine, Everything has to do with Kamakhya. When I first went there, I was a schoolboy. And when I was, I got to know. This is us honoring the yoni of a goddess. Because when you travel within India, you honor, like Chinnamastika, honor the head of the goddess. There's Vaishno Devi, that honors the heart. And, you know, different goddesses honor different parts of goddess temples in India. When you go to Kamakhya temple in Assam, India, northeast India, you honor the Yoni. It's dark. You go into the cave. It's all dark there.
- [61:30]
Sahara Rose
And by the way, for someone who doesn't know, Yoni means the womb, the vulva, and it's much more sacred name of calling it vagina. It's very medical term. But the word yoni actually means the portal between two worlds.
- [61:46]
Chandresh
Thank you for that. And I feel yoni is Becoming such a. Such a normal word now also. Right.
- [61:51]
Sahara Rose
In case there was anyone who didn't know.
- [61:53]
Chandresh
Yeah, but I owe a lot to Kamakhya Goddess, for the way I understood feminine, I understood woman because as a man, we all grew up hearing and knowing and learning. Very interesting view of women based on patriarchy, media, movies and everything. Yoni energy is or Kamakhya, Goddess is important for you to honor the womb. This is your source, your creation. Kamakhya is that one unique portal that honors your creativity, your sexual health, your sensuality, your abundance. So there are many tantrics that recommend kamakhya is enough. One goddess is enough for you to grow, for you to enhance all aspects of your life. Because guess what? You come from Yoni. We are born from there. So we are simply honoring our source. And her aura is very reddish ish, very warm, deep, very powerful energy extension of Kali are very potent when it comes to honoring the energy within for all genders, not just women.
- [63:02]
Sahara Rose
It's so important to honor this and again bringing it to another spiritual lineage. The Mayans honored the womb very deeply. I was in Guatemala last year studying Mayan womb massage, which is over your belly, but it's actually moving your uterus back into the place. And so much of the practice is about listening to the yoni. You go into the temescal. The temescal is like homemade sauna that you have these stones on it called the abuelos, which is like the grandfathers. And they're these hot stones. So it's like all this fresh steam and they have these plants and it's dark, completely dark. And they're like the yoni. And you're so hot, like the kind of hot where like, like you move your hand and it's burning and. But you're. But it's very like confronting and you're on mud. There's no bottom to it. It's like a makeshift earth based one. And so you're confronting any fears you have, any discomfort that you have and just surrendering it into the earth, into the womb. And you come out on the other side feeling so reborn, truly reborn. And so we were actually doing the womb massage inside the Temazca with the herbs, with the yoni steaming and you know, so I love hearing because I mean, if we actually look at it even in like Catholic, like the cathedral, there's a lot of yonis in that art. There's a huge book called Womb Awakening that shows pictures of different Christian, like even Mother Mary, if you look at her depiction, her sleeves It's a yoni. Everything was a yoni. If you really bring it back. All spiritual lineages were honoring the womb because it was what created life. It is the. It's the most godly thing that we have on this planet.
- [64:55]
Chandresh
Absolutely. And I think normalizing the word yoni, I mean, everything you spoke about the temple, by the way, that could be a Kamakhya temple explanation also. That's exactly how they honor her. I feel this language of honoring the yoni energy has to be normalized. Women give so much of their life to the family, to the kids, the partner, to the world. Even if they don't have children, even if they're not married, they give so much of themselves to the collective. The least thing we could do is bring safety for her Yoni energy, her root, to feel comfortable, safe. That's it. Forget about tantra, yoga, all the spiritual practices create safe container for the woman. That's enough. If you can do that, maybe you don't need 10 goddesses.
- [65:43]
Sahara Rose
Literally, it is an epidemic.
- [65:46]
Chandresh
Exactly.
- [65:47]
Sahara Rose
All right, who's next?
- [65:48]
Chandresh
The goddess I want to bring. She's the. I kept her for the final one because she is considered the epitome of tantra work. Okay. Many different names. Sri Vidya, Lalitha Tripura Sundari, Tara, Kamala, everything. But I'll use the word Lalitha to address her. But the full name is Lalitha Tripura Sundri. I know. You have a card in that, right? I remember that one. So Lalita Tripura Sundri is considered the epitome of tantra work because she invites you to experience everything, the highest of your material abundance, your spiritual growth, plus all other aspects of life. She was. For a long time, she was called the goddess only for the kings, the powerful people, because guess what? They wanted to experience the best of everything. Beauty, sensuality, you know, material success, spiritual growth, spiritual awakening. But, you know, thankfully, it's not restricted to just kings, you know. For now, Lalita Tripur Sundari also contains other two goddesses, Kamala and Tara. Because Kamala and Tara, they are very similar to Lakshmi goddess, but in a tantric way. Lakshmi is known as the goddess of abundance, wealth, but more like social well being, more like overall well being of your life. But instead of. You could, of course, meditate on Kamala or Tara. But the right thing, if there's a right thing, would be to surrender to Lalitatru Pura Sundari, because she really brings out the best in you. She's also known as the most stunning, beautiful goddess among all 10 goddesses. Because all the other goddesses, they are not conventionally beautiful. They have a way to shock you. I mean, if Kali appears right now, I bet both of us will not be sitting like this. So all the goddesses do have a way to shock you, to bring out their shadow in you. Lalitha is one goddess. She will not shock you. She'll not bring out the ugliness in you. She'll really elevate you. She'll really make you the queen, the king, the muse. She is the Goddess who empowers your sensuality, your spirituality, your creativity. Anyone who's struggling with growth in life, you know, growth has in financial growth, creative growth, suppressive sensuality. Absolutely. Lalita is the Goddess, but she has to be combined with Kali. Because if there is only suppression. Right now, you should not be jumping into Lalitha. You have to go through Kali. In fact, the rule is, and I recommend this to every student, always begin with Kali. Then tell Kali, send me Lalita. Send me Matangi. Because then Kali will make sure to send that version, that flow to you in the safe way. Kali is Ma. She can create, she can destroy. So she knows what you need and how much you need. So she'll release that dosage in the perfect way. Yeah. So that. There's one more. But this is Lalitha. Yeah.
- [68:56]
Sahara Rose
I love that. And it's almost like when I saw. When I heard you say to honor Kali first. It. It's to also let go of the ego of. It needs to be a certain way. Like to pray for more beauty, to pray for more abundance, to pray for more. It's like this add on energy. It's like I'm already this, and I want more. When you pray to Kali, you're saying, kali, I don't know what you will take away in my life. And I trust you. And I trust that whatever it is, that is not in total truth. If it's. It's gone. Let it be.
- [69:34]
Chandresh
Yeah.
- [69:34]
Sahara Rose
And when we can show up with that level of humility, that's when we get the genuine beauty. Like, I saw myself in my own divorce journey of when I surrendered into the unknown, of not knowing how dark it would get, not knowing how long I would be there surrendering to. Maybe I will never dance again. Maybe I will never like bright colors again. Maybe that old version of me is gone. And if I stay in this forever, I'll be here, right? And when I fully started into that not, oh, I'm gonna go into the darkness to have the glow up on the other side, right? Where's the glow up? It's like, if darkness is my new name, that's my new name. And that is actually what led to the journey of the rest of them. And. And it's not a linear street. It's not like, and now I'm Lalita Sri Pohara and everything is perfect in my life. Not at all. You know, it's like I dance with Kali every single day. I dance with Matanga. I dance with all of these different ladies layers. And I feel they all have city sides, like really beautiful gift sides. And they all have like denser, shadowy sides to them as well. That, you know, that's why I brought up the energy of lust. It's like you can take that. Are you really operating from like the highest level of passion or lust? Are you operating with every single one of them? We could go through. It could be a whole other conversation cds. Yes.
- [70:53]
Chandresh
I do want to point out something and this might be helpful to readers, especially not readers listeners, especially those who have known you for many years. I feel your journey did have such a big Kali element destroying, demolishing. Since you were a young kid, you know, so much of demolition has happened. Then Matangi held you. You started to go into speaking podcast. How old were you when the podcast started?
- [71:22]
Sahara Rose
I was 26.
- [71:24]
Chandresh
Right. And that was Matangi Saraswati self expression happening now. Anyone who understands Tantra can easily say, oh, she embodies the Lalitha. But it didn't happen overnight. Happened through Matangi, through Kalyan. It's important to mention this because people do get tempted. Oh, Lalitha is so beautiful. Lalitha Tripura Sundari means the one who's most beautiful and attractive in all dimensions. So who wouldn't be tempted to meditate on her? Everyone wants to be attractive. But the thing is you have to go through Kali Matangi Bhairavi. You have to meet the shadows. You cannot just jump on Lalita. This is why the powerful people in ancient times, they reserved her for them because they didn't want people to misuse. And this is why tantra is not accessible through books and through just a dialogue conversation. Because this is a lot of super secrets and powers, right? Anyone can misuse it and they do misuse it. So this is why yoga will not have that abuse, but Tantra does, because of all this massive information. And I think this is a good moment to conclude the Dasma Vidya because we are at the final goddess. Usually people say, you know, I reserve the sweetest for the last. But this is not the most sweetest goddess. She's Dhuma, perhaps the most intimidating goddess, and she always wear white. She's also known as the goddess of the widows in India. And I get it why there is a goddess for the widows in India, because as you might know, the state of a widow woman in India was never good. They were just, you know, kicked out of society. They were just not seen as a proper human either. There were rituals, practices where the horrible things have happened to them. So there is only one temple, I think maximum two. I haven't visited. My, you know, teacher has gone there a few times, but not everyone can go there. Also, there are very strict rituals and practices. This is one goddess I would not recommend anyone you can study and read, but no need to meditate because these are very super sensitive energies. What does Dhumavati represent, though? A complete, complete detachment, a complete disconnection from the illusions of society. You go into a very different zone, my friend. Like a. It's a. Like a Stranger Things season. But you are in a different dimension where you are aloof from society, but it does empower you. It does give you a lot of powerful energy. But this is for one of those who are on that agori path, aloof, disconnected from society, but this is it. Sara's podcast has 10 goddesses.
- [74:04]
Sahara Rose
I love it. Thank you for sharing all of these. And I see deities in a similar way that you and the Tantric Pact sees them as consciousnesses. You know, they're the personification of these mass consciousnesses that we have historically always been tapping into. We've always all felt this energy of death. We've always felt the energy of raw expression, of sexuality, of divine beauty. And what I love about the goddesses is it allows us to personify it. And, like, who is she and what is her story and how is she connected to the others? And it allows us to symbologize what we go through in our life, you know, because we can, like, say it from this really, like, intellectual, like, rational perspective. But I love how the feminine, we learn through story.
- [74:53]
Chandresh
Yeah.
- [74:54]
Sahara Rose
You know, and it creates that story that allows us to see, oh, yes, that is the containment that I desired, such as. And I love bringing back to the beginning of the podcast that image of Kali Wild standing on top of sheep and him just lying there in that, like, pure devotion and, like, in awe of her. I'm like, that's my dream relationship right there. Right there. That picture is it, you know.
- [75:18]
Chandresh
Right.
- [75:19]
Sahara Rose
And so it allows us to, like, I feel like images, they say so much more than words. So it's like an image. The fact that that image has existed for maybe 10,000 years.
- [75:30]
Chandresh
Yeah.
- [75:30]
Sahara Rose
And the idea of it even before and we're still resonating with it shows every woman on earth has always felt that way. Will my expression always be held? Every single woman, every person on earth has felt all of these energies. And it shows us that, like, the things we're going through, like, you're not alone, first of all. And it's also nothing new. We've all been coming on the stage of life, doing this dance, having the confusion, having the dramas, and then going on. And the next generation will have the same. And it's like we're all really living the same life. Different plot lines, but the same hero's journey.
- [76:05]
Chandresh
Exactly. The longing remains there for every feminine to feel safe. It could be Kali. The beautiful thing is, if Kali wants to be held and safe, then it's normal for a modern woman to feel that if God, like Shiva, could let go of his ego and surrender, then a guy walking on, you know, Venice or Santa Monica, they should have enough courage and let go of their ego.
- [76:28]
Sahara Rose
Put this on my dating app. What are you looking for? This.
- [76:32]
Chandresh
Put that photo there if you can. You have to match the standard.
- [76:36]
Sahara Rose
You can't get my Lolita if you can't handle. Handle my Kali. Okay. Boom. It's slogan.
- [76:43]
Chandresh
I love it.
- [76:44]
Sahara Rose
And. And it's. It's in all of us. So thank you so much for allowing them to come into life. And I hope everyone listening to this was able to see themselves in each of these stories, see different stages of their lives, see their friends, their mothers, their grandmothers. And this is such a good conversation to share with friends of, like, which deity did you resonate with? And I love when he talked about this. And it really landed on with me when they said that this is such a good starting point to have these juicy conversations. So thank you so much, Chandra, for being here, for your devotion to the path. And where can listeners find your Instagram and connect with you further?
- [77:19]
Chandresh
Where can they find me? They can find me on Instagram @cb meditates. I have a podcast, the Leela show, and My website is cbmeditates.com where I continue to share new substack or whatever new is happening. But Instagram and podcast is where so much of me is present. So do listen. I hope you enjoy that.
- [77:41]
Sahara Rose
Well, thank you so much for being here today. Thank you for listening, for being with us till the very end. This was a very multifaceted and rich. I felt like I could just sit by the gong and have these conversations all day. So thank you for being a part of it. Be sure to subscribe to this wherever you are listening. This allows you to stay in the loop for future conversations. There are so many incredible ones that you'll just love and adore. And thank you again for being part of this community. I'll see you in the next one. Namaste. Trust your intuition. Trust your inner wisdom. Trust your inner guidance. Close your eyes and listen. So trust your intuition, Trust your inner wisdom. Trust you in the guidance class.