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What's up, everybody? Giannis Pappas here, otherwise known as Yanis Peanut Head Pappas. And I'm here with my co host of the history hyenas, Chris DiStefano, otherwise known as Superman or Tom Cruise from the Outsiders.
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It's what it is. Because make no mistake, I went to the gym before this and I spent an extra five minutes in the bathroom because I wanted my hair to look cute for you all.
B
I. When I look you, I just want to go, oh, from the 50s.
A
But does it look good?
B
It looks good. It. It. You could bring it back. It. Did it do that naturally? Yeah. You look like Christopher Reeves, cuz.
A
Well, because the truth is, is I did it. I did it because I just wanted to walk in here and you to say you're cute.
B
You know, be funny. If Christopher Reeves was really from Ridgewood, Queens.
A
Yeah.
B
You know, and he got the role of Superman. If you got the role of Superman, you'd be like, hi, I'm here to save you ladies. Yeah. Yeah. How you doing? Yeah, Bad, bad, bad, bad. Yeah, I'm gonna go get the. Who said I'm gonna get the Riddler? Yeah, I'm gonna go get the.
A
Yeah.
B
They were like, this is my Robin and I. Yeah.
A
They would say. They would keep say, like, cut. Chris, it's Luther. Not Luther.
B
Yeah.
A
Hey, Lex Lutha. They would say, can you pronounce the R? And Luther, I would say, pronounce the R. Yeah.
B
Because you got a queen's accent, but you grew up with women, so. Yes. You know what I've learned? This is just for the New York people. What I've learned is a guy that grows up in Queens with all women.
A
Yeah.
B
Right. Even though they're in Queens, when you grow up with all women, it forces your queen's accent into a Long island accent. Yeah. And I don't know how that happens. It's like a mathematical equation. Have you noticed that, Jesse, there's something about when you grow up with all women, it Just makes like you into a long island. So his is like a long island.
A
Because make no mistake, where the giggly squad for gay guys. Yeah, we're the giggly squad for guys because giggly squad shout out Hannah Burner and Paige to Sorbo. They got a great pod called giggly squad and it's huge. And I just feel like we're the giggly squad for guys. And make no mistake, Paige to Sorbo. Peace.
B
You know, we're gonna do too Hannah Burner. We're gonna do what happened with Billie Jean King, and we're gonna play the two of them in doubles in tennis.
A
Yeah, yeah, we're gonna get worked because Hannah Burner can play tennis very well.
B
But the other girl can't, and neither one of us can. But we're boys, so that should balance it out, make it even.
A
It's what it is, cuz. And DEZ Bishop will be on the sidelines judging the match in Chines. The kid's a spy. Yeah, he's a je.
B
Kid may be a spy.
A
I love He's a spy. And shout them out. I was. I was in Madison, Wisconsin this weekend and I was really laughing at their. At their Instagram stuff. It's very funny. But today's episode. Okay, we got a good one today. We're screwed in. And we're going to talk about John D. Rockefeller, who many of you have heard of. One of the wealthiest man, some people think the wealthiest man to ever live, certainly the wealthiest man in modern history, if you adjust for inflation. He was so wild. There are so many things about how he created the education system for his own good, how his father was a crazy con man, the different schemes he came up with to make us believe things that weren't true. And then there's a couple of fun facts about him and a couple of things that when people talk about it publicly on the Internet, things just happen. They go missing, they die in mass shootings. It's just things get a little weird. So we're gonna talk about those things. But make no mistake, even though we don't value our lives as much as you think we do, we still kind of do. And we got families. And we're going to tell you some stories, specifically about people making cars that run on water. And John D. Rockefeller does not like a car that runs on water. And we're going to tell you all Those stories at Patreon.com history arenas to keep us safe and keep this pod going. Because make no mistake, we are. We were just added To Trump's cabinet.
B
We were. Yeah. Because it's an all podcast administration.
A
It's what it is.
B
It's everyone who's appeared on Rogan and that's how you know him. Nobody. Tulsi Gabbard before she appeared on Rogan. She's a piece. She's a piece.
A
And Dr. Oz is going to save this country's medicine because.
B
Yeah, I want Tulsi Gilbert to do yoga on our faces.
A
I really would love nothing more to just have RFK just really start taking the fluoride out of our water and giving us healthy food. So this way Tulsi Gabbard can just be healthy and then just have her take a poopy on my head.
B
Yeah.
A
Just a clean poopy.
B
Because you're a nice guy. You do ask girls, right?
A
Yeah, it's one of. Well, in the past.
B
When in the past.
A
Because in the past, to make no mistake, I'm going to tell those stories, too. But that could only be a Patreon.
B
Patreon.
A
I. Unfortunately, that's the way. If there is one thing that has changed about the hyenas is I'm definitely down to go wild. But I do have to put it behind a paywall because it's not. And listen, it's not even about. It's not even about, you know, career stuff. I mean, who cares? On my career. We're having fun here. It's just that there's multiple people that have active lawsuits against me. So. For saying that kind of stuff. So I still will say it, but once it's behind a paywall, according to my lawyer, I'm technically not saying it in public. I'm saying it in private. So that's why it's at the Patriot. And there's nothing we could do because we like to have fun.
B
Yes. Are we pitching you on the Patreon? Yes, but go. Go and see for yourself.
A
Well, because the YouTube is demonetized and that's not my fault. That's the last administration's fault.
B
Yes, that's.
A
So we got an infrastructure here that we got to just keep going and that's all. And the heat, the problem with these buildings, you just can't turn off the heat. And make no mistake, I'm going to turn off that radiator and throw it out the window.
B
Yeah.
A
Just sweating.
B
There's nothing we could do about the heat. And John D. Rockefeller.
A
John D. Rockefeller.
B
Rockefeller.
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He.
B
He was a Cleveland kid back then. Cleveland was popping.
A
Yes, he. Yet make no mistake, he was a Cleveland kid. And it's, we are not sure if he would have been a fan of LeBron James.
B
We don't know. We don't know.
A
Because the thing about the conundrum about Rockefeller is he was a very religious, pious kid, but also, make no mistake, a scumbag.
B
Yeah. The thing about Rockefeller is the thing to understand, like, was he like an angel and a devil at the same time, or was he a devil who just used religion to just try to get into heaven and go, like, just go to confession and go, I did this. I, I, Some of the employees of competitors are actually on my payroll. I've monopolized the whole supply chain. I own the railroads. I'm using all this chicanery to become the richest man. And father, just give me 15 Hail Marys. And for my. I still got a chance to get to heaven. Because he was a kid who was always looking to cut a deal, cut a deal.
A
And he was a Catholic kid. And the thing with us Catholics is we will do things that are naughty, and then we pray and ask for forgiveness. So I can't tell you how many times I've glued in my own belly button and then had to just make the sign of the cross and accidentally had a little glue on my hand and just put glue on my head like it's Ash Wednesday. So I've done that a few times in my life. I've glued my own head because I just. You have to pray and make the sign of the cross. Your prayer does not get hurt by God unless you sign of the cross. And it's been a couple of times my fingers are just a little gluey and I just hit myself like it was holy water. So that, and that, and that's us just being Catholic.
B
And that, that's why I always had the theory that I think Catholic is the most hot. I think it's the most hot. Look at it. Think about it. Hispanic girls, mostly Catholic.
A
Gorgeous.
B
Right. Like Irish girls, Catholic. They just, it, it's almost worth it. The repression of the church that they tell you masturbation is a sin is worth it. Like, I think even if you don't believe in religion, you should keep the Catholic Church going just because how naughty it makes the sex.
A
The least amount of fumes in any religion is Catholicism. And I, I think that's actually undebatable.
B
Yeah. Because they put incense in there.
A
They put, yeah, we put incense in our fumes, and we're always just washing our fumes away with holy water.
B
Yeah. Well, according to you, it's coconuts aloe. It's, that's the key.
A
Coconut cookies. Yeah. I put on your ball. I'm obviously the beautiful Puerto Rican woman and there's coconut cookies in every draw. And I know why.
B
This Puerto Rican girl I used to date in high school, she would send me to the store to buy coconut cookies. Yeah. You remember, 25 cents for two coconut cookies. Yeah.
A
Yeah.
B
They like coconut cookies.
A
They do like coconut cookies and so do I.
B
And you could attract them with coconut cookies.
A
I could attract them with coconut mangoes. Yeah. I could attract them with coconut cookies. And make no mistake, I just love the Latino culture. And I, I, I just, I don't know. Yeah, I want to be Latino. And I think John D. Rockefeller would have accepted me and my Latino family into his family. Because I think that ultimately what it comes down to is John D. Rockefeller, if you're Catholic, you were okay. And if you're not Catholic, you are not okay. Yeah, I don't think he saw it at race or anything like that. I saw, he saw religion.
B
Yeah. He was a religion kid. You know who he would have loved? Who? Mexicans. Yeah. Undocumented labor. Yeah. Guys who are willing to work for nothing. He would have loved.
A
Yeah, it would have loved it. And you know, that brings us to our first big thing about John D. Rockefeller. Because here's the truth, folks. This episode is going to be a little bit of conspiracy cuties. Remember when we used to be conspiracy cuties and have little conspiracy. So we're going to pepper in some conspiracy cutie theories throughout the YouTube, but the big ones that will get us killed are at Patreon.
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Yeah.
A
But the, but this is a little conspiracy cutie that may. Maybe some people know, maybe some people don't, is he created our modern day education system. He created it like public schools. That's John D. Rockefeller.
B
Wow.
A
That's John D. Rockefeller, created our modern public schools, modern day public school system as we know it. And he created it, he says publicly, because he wanted to give education to people who couldn't afford it. Because at that time you had to pay for your education everywhere. It was a privileged thing to be educated. So he was like, I want to give it to everyone. But he specifically said that term, reading, writing, arithmetic, which we still say today. He was the one that said, that's what you're going to teach them, reading, writing, arithmetic. You're not going to teach them about investing, you're not going to teach them about big business stuff, business strategy in any of that. The stock market. He doesn't want anyone to know about that. And if you look at public school curriculum today.
B
Wow, that is interesting.
A
Very, very few of them te teach any of that, because what he wanted is for people to know how to stay in line, go to school from 8 to 3, learn how to stay on a schedule, and work in his factories that were building the cars and the oil.
B
Yeah.
A
So that's what it is.
B
He was a fucking megalomaniac. There's no other way to say. Yeah, he just. He wanted the whole oil industry. He wanted the whole country. He just. He was a fucking megalomaniac.
A
That's what it is.
B
He wanted complete control.
A
What it is. Because. And it's one of these things where I'm just noticing about me is I do want other men to just be attractive. It to me. Like, I'm going like this because I want in. In your brain to be like, chris is a handsome guy. And I want you to say it out loud.
B
Yeah, yeah. No, you're.
A
But I. But I think I might just be.
B
Making my hair worse because I just. Right now, I just want to. I want to share a vanilla shake with you. It's what it is in a nice Norman Rockwell diner.
A
Yeah.
B
You look like you're from the 50s, but you're wearing 2024 clothes, right? Yeah. And the hair is definitely 1950.
A
And I. Yeah, doo wop and. And.
B
Yeah.
A
And this is the kind of haircut that says, get out of my neighborhood. That's what this haircut says. When you're done with a haircut like this, you go, get out of my neighborhood.
B
Yeah. You look like a kid from the other side of the tracks.
A
And I got to be honest with you.
B
Date the rich girl.
A
You look like you have more hair this week.
B
Yeah, I think I. Yeah, yeah, you.
A
Look like you have more hair.
B
It depends on. It depends on a lot of things. It depends on. That was always the problem. If I gel it, it looks a little thinner, but if I leave it natural, it looks thicker. So I'm always. There's a pro and a con to what I do.
A
And I have noticed that you're wearing your chain outside your sweatshirt, which is a wild move that you don't see much. You don't see chain outside the sweatshirt unless you're a friar.
B
Look.
A
Look at that.
B
Look at Emilio Estevez, because that's you, right?
A
Yeah, I'm Emilio Estevez. And make no mistake, I have the blood of Charlie Sheen. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
B
You got hyjida blood.
A
I got hyena tiger.
B
Blood. You have hyena blood?
A
I got hyena blood. And. And it's. Yeah, it's. I've just.
B
I don't know what it is.
A
Because the only thing that gets me is my cholesterol and my blood pressure.
B
Here's the situation. Yeah. Here's the situation. Is John D. Rockefeller.
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You know what the D stands for? Davidson.
B
Davidson.
A
John Pete Davidson Rockefeller.
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John Davidson Rockefeller. We can safely assume that the kid was a tough hang. He was a tough hag.
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Yes.
B
He's not a kid. He was a guy who would lecture you about piety and not cursing.
A
Yeah.
B
And doing all this stuff. But his pops was wild. His pops was a fun fucking kid. And if everything is really comes down to mommy and Daddy, when you think about it, this kid was a control freak. He was austere. He wanted everything to be.
A
Blah, blah, blah, blah. Right.
B
Dominated people, kept him in line. And how. And look at what his dad. His dad was the opposite. So that's why he became who he became, because his dad was fucking loosey goosey.
A
His dad was a criminal. His father's name was William Avery Rockefeller, and he was known for very dubious activities. He was pretty much known as a con man. And that's what happens is sometimes what you are is your father is a certain way, and you think you're not that way, but you take little pieces of it. Like I said, I've never gambled on anything. I have never, ever, ever gambled in my life. My father said, do not. Because gambling took down a lot of big things in his life. He said, don't gamble on sports. I've never done. I don't even know what a vig is or anything.
B
Lend me a thousand because I got a good feeling about the fight. It's what it is.
A
He told me, never gamble, never play cards. I don't even know what a card trick is. So I was sitting here for years of my life saying, I don't gamble, while also at the same time having. I don't even know it's a. Garrett. It's just what it is. Because sometimes the gambling comes out in another way. And same thing with William Avery Rockefeller versus John D. Rockefeller. Maybe he was like, oh, I'm not a con man like my dad, but I will convince people to work for me for free.
B
Yeah. I will do all types of tricky stuff.
A
Yes.
B
And it just. That's just how it goes. It gets in your consciousness and that somehow that is your conditioning, your. Your Nate, your nurture. And that's what happened Here, it's one. He's a product. I mean, his father was a full blown con man who went around pretending to be a doctor just selling elixirs. He was going, hey, look what happens. You got cancer. Well, have you tried oregano pills?
A
Yeah, she was pulling Gassy Shout out Paulie Gassey. Who, by the way, Shout out Paulie Gassey. He is absolutely shredded. Have you seen Paulie Gassy? Because Paulie Gassey's Instagram right now. Who? Our old trainer. Boxing training. Who sold oregano pills and would train me while eating tortellini Alfredo his mother made in his garage. In his boxing gym garage. The kid has gotten so ripped. P A U L I E G A S S I Paulie Gassey. Go subscribe. Go buy his. I think he sells vitamins. No, not him. G A S S I. I think he sells vitamins now. He was definitely telling us that oregano pills cured everything. And he's not wrong. Yeah, Paul G. There it is. I think this. Yeah, there. Look at how shredded. And the second picture is me.
B
Yeah, yeah.
A
I mean, but look at how shredded the kid, Paul Gassey looks fantastic.
B
He looks, he looks fantastic.
A
He looks fantastic.
B
Yeah, that' you want to play games with?
A
No, that's. And that right there, that right there. He's a Catholic kid wearing the crucifix on his neck like John D. Rockefeller, but that is what. Oregano pills.
B
Do you think he swung it to the side for the pick?
A
Yes, I think he swung it to the side for the pick. But I mean, make no mistake, he will get banged out, right?
B
Yeah, he's a cute.
A
Paul Gaston get banged out.
B
He's a cute kid.
A
Yeah, yeah, yeah. And he's, he's just a great man. And, and, and he's, he's just, he's just an excellent. He's an excellent. You bring his, his brother has special needs and he's great. Great to his brother.
B
Yeah, he is great to his brother. Yeah. You don't want to make fun of his brother.
A
Never in a million years.
B
He loves his brother.
A
Yeah, he loves his brother and his brother's. His brother's a great kid.
B
Here's the.
A
Paul's a great kid.
B
He's a great kid. I always think about, just when you think about a guy like his dad, John D. Rockefeller.
A
Paul Gassy.
B
No, John D. Rockefeller's dad. You just know that the kid was just, he was so charismatic.
A
Yeah.
B
You know, he was so care. You can't just walk up to anyone and be like, oh, you got the Flu. Here, just eat this handful of ants and you'll be fine. You gotta sell. You gotta sell, so you gotta sell. And it works. And the kid made money doing it. Yeah.
A
Cause here's the thing about. Here's the thing about John D. Rockefeller. Another interesting thing about him is as much as you wanna believe that John D. Rockefeller, you know, wanted to help other people and did absolutely donate a lot of money, he still, I think he's donated over the course of his life, the Rockefeller family has donated billions with A B, billions of dollars to charity and schools and hospitals and doing the right thing. And he, as much as she said how religious he was and how he just, you know, wanted to help others and that's why he believed he was on his earth. The kid got multip transplants to try to keep living as long as he possibly could. And make no mistake, there were other people who needed that heart transplant to live. And he just pushed them out of the way and went to first on the list and just got heart transplants so his blood would pump. Pump nicer so he could live longer. So that there's that part of him too.
B
He was a complicated kid. Hard to figure out.
A
We all are.
B
As we all are.
A
Because he started my shoes off.
B
Take your shoes off and get comfy.
A
I'm going to get comfy because grounding. You know about grounding? Yeah, yeah, yeah.
B
You just grounded you.
A
No, no, no. That's be where your feet are in the present. Being friendly with the present, which we all must. Radical acceptance. But, but the. But the grounding is when you just want to be barefoot.
B
Yeah.
A
As much as you can.
B
Yeah. So why don't you take your socks?
A
That's what I'm gonna do. You want to do it too? Why does everybody get their socks off?
B
Yeah, I'll ground with you.
A
Let's ground in here. And then.
B
You ever see this? His feet. No. Yeah, yeah, his feet.
A
Oh, can you get that on, Cat? Is that on? Yeah. How's that?
B
His feet.
A
Is that it right there?
B
Look like they got shaped.
A
Yeah.
B
In a high heel pub. Yeah.
A
Can you guys spread your toes? Like, can you spread your toes? Okay. Ask me to spread my toes. Say, Chris, spread your toes. Okay. That I can't see how they kind of just move. I can't spread them. You know, this. This one's a little bit less jacked up, but it still is jacked up.
B
The Huns, the tribe. The Huns used to wrap the skulls so the kids would have like, long head. It looks like somebody Wrapped his feet in a high heel shoe and just made it form because you could naturally just go right into a high heel shoe.
A
So what? I had to. I had to. I had to do a little skit. I had to do a little skit a couple years ago. And they had me dress up like a woman.
B
Yeah.
A
And they had to get me like size 13 or 14 pumps. And they were like, like. Oh, you know, like you're gonna be in these all day, so why don't you take them off? Like at some point you were comfortable. Well, I said I would take them off and then I literally, when we were like in between takes, I would. Kept forgetting to take them off because it just felt like I was wearing no shoes. They just became a part of me.
B
Yeah.
A
I just, I felt like I was this.
B
Right now, the way they're shaped is so funny. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
A
I mean, make no mistake, I was driving the other day and I saw this pic and I'm gonna send this to Jesse. And this is just what it is. Cuz.
B
Cuz, you know, your feet are like. They're like a double decker tourist bus.
A
Yeah.
B
And the bottom is full of people. And then there's just one guy on the top. That one toes on the second floor.
A
Yeah.
B
Because you got one toe above the rest of the toes.
A
Yeah.
B
That toe thinks it's better than the rest of them.
A
Wait here, let me show you this. Hold on. Oh, God. Where is it? Here, look. I. I was driving away and I'm gonna send this to. To v. To Jesse. But I just. Look at that. I saw a guy at the bus stop just in jeans and pumps. The guy just had high heel sho work. The guy is dressed completely normal. Completely normal from head to toe. Except I just noticed there's something different about this guy. And then I noticed he had a copy of Just high heel pumps on. And I. And I rolled down, I said, where'd you get those?
B
Do you think it's possible you'll start wearing high heel pumps?
A
Honestly, man, I'm going to be fully 100% honest with you.
B
Yeah.
A
I'm 40 years old now.
B
Yeah.
A
Okay. I'm friendly with my present. You know, I'm doing the things I need to do. I just want to be comfy one feet as much as I possibly can. That's why I've mentioned this a couple of times. I've been wearing these pants, baggy clothes. I'm dressing more like Venetia because I just. I want to be comfortable. I'm I'm worried less about what someone thinks. Me, I just want to be comfortable. So if the shoes, multiple shoes now are starting to hurt my feet because this is what happened to my dad. My dad had to get his toes broken eventually when he was in his mid-40s because all his toes would just start creeping up on the tops of his shoes. So I'm going to start either wearing open toe sandals or high heels. Yeah, whatever makes me feel better.
B
Yeah. Yeah.
A
Because I'm not going to cram my foot into a Jordan anymore when I know that that's not who the true me is. Yeah, the true me might want to just be in men's clothes and high heel shoes.
B
We always come to a point in life, I think, where life teaches you that you need balance and that nature is all about balance. And that happened to John D. Rockefeller.
A
Yes.
B
So he was going hard. He was making Katrins and then he had a nervous breakdown. He was having stomach problems when he couldn't eat. And he had.
A
He really.
B
Yeah. And he had to go retreat somewhere because he was like getting sick.
A
Right.
B
And that's when he made the decision, like, I got to start giving away some of this fortune. I got to start thinking about others because he was getting sick. And so he stayed there for a while, months and months and months. And he was actually thinking about retiring. And he was.
A
What age. Do we know what age around?
B
I think he was in like his 50s or 60s or something.
A
This is when he got the heart transplant. He got his first heart even younger. 40, 40, sort of stomach issues.
B
I mean, bad, like real bad. Like he was so stressed that he said, like, I was. I was close to a nervous breakdown. I was working too hard, I was pushing too hard. I was trying to control the world too much. And he went and he goes, I just started. I got to start being in service of others. And that's when he started leaning in to giving his money away in the philanthropy because he needed a little balance in his life.
A
You need a little balance, but make no mistake, you are who you are. So that balance turned into, I'm going to open up schools and hospitals and manipulate everybody, but I'm going to manipulate everyone. I'm going to have the schools for the workers and I'm going to open up the hospitals, I'm going to make new drugs. I'm going to steal people's hearts.
B
Yes, he stole multiple.
A
You know, to get one heart transplant is like almost unheard of. This kid got like three of them. He has three. Three different people's hearts in his chest.
B
Yeah.
A
That's a real thing.
B
Yeah. He had. He had access to the best health care at the time because he was paying them. He's probably. That was probably part of his motivation, was like, here. Here's all this money for research. Go cure what you need to cure. But I'm at the front of the line. You push whatever pauper to the side for whatever I need.
A
Yeah.
B
If I got a hanged toenail, I want to be first in front. If there's a woman who's dying, put her to the side and fix my toenail. Yeah.
A
Because make no mistake, we did not learn finance at all in school. It's very, very small. But I read a book called the Simple Path to Wealth. So we are now your financial gurus.
B
Yes, we are.
A
It's what it is. Come to us for finance advice. But, Jesse, please put a disclaimer that we are not professionals.
B
Yeah, that's the thing, is. That worked for him. Yeah, that worked for him. And it worked for all of the industrial tycoons of the era.
A
Your feet are just smooth. Cuz if. If we just had a camera close up.
B
Up. Because make nice feet.
A
Because make no mistake, you have. You have the feet of a teenage girl. Yeah. I mean, the kid has a softball girl's foot. Look at how smooth his feet are. Look at that. I mean, cut. Do you lotion up your feet?
B
I don't lotion above. It's natural, bro. Yeah.
A
I mean, his feet. Cuz you. You definitely have nicer feet than every woman in your family. You do, right?
B
Yeah, I think I do. My, my. They look really good in the pump. If I shave the hair on the toenails. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Because I got hairy toenails. That's the only problem.
A
Yeah, yeah. And unfort, unfortunately, because, you know, I got. See how. See on my toe? See all the. This toe? The toe.
B
It's on the upper deck of the bus.
A
It goes on the upper bus.
B
Yeah.
A
Unfortunately. Unfortunately. Jasmine, when we had our oldest daughter, the very first thing she did is check her feet, and she's good. But my younger daughter got clipped. My younger daughter, the very first thing she did. I literally. We're holding our beautiful baby daughter at doc, saying everything. She's good. She's good. And then Jazz was like, give me my baby. Give me my baby. So gave it. And I mean, the literal first thing she does is she takes that baby and she looks like this, and she goes, oh. And then my daughter's toes were just over like that.
B
Yeah. And so we did.
A
That's what, you know, I made a joke. And so I'm getting a paternity test. That baby's not mine. And she said, oh, yeah. And then you just pulled at her feet. And we have identical feet. And it's. See, these kind of feet for a guy are fun for a girl. It's bad, it's bad. I worry about my daughters.
B
Yeah, well, you know, that's called not getting nicked. That's called getting clipped. When you get full blown, you get clipped. Yeah.
A
Wait, cuz, hold on. This chair there. I'm stuck. Okay, now.
B
Yeah.
A
Are we good? Are we still good?
B
You're good, you're good.
A
So John D. Rockefeller, he would also. He had the largest collection human at the time of beetles. The kid loved collecting insects and beetles. And he would never go anywhere without his collection of bugs.
B
Yeah. That's why you could tell he was just not a good hag. You're at a bar with him, he didn't drink at all. Yeah, he ate simply. But can you imagine, you try to have a conversation with this kid and he's just like, you want, want to. You wanted to see my beetle collection? Yeah. You're like, get out of here, you nerd.
A
You know? Yeah. Because make no mistake, and that's my first similarity to John D. Rockefeller. We're both bug chasers.
B
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Because you got the feet of 115 year old Chinese woman.
A
I mean, look at that. That woman. And they, they absolutely web that woman's feet in like Chinese foot traps.
B
That's what I'm saying. Yeah.
A
So it's what it is. We're all a little different.
B
Yeah. Everyone's got a little different. Everyone's got pros and cons. It's balance.
A
Yeah.
B
Black and white, cookies, the letter eight. Everything is balanced. Nature always seeks balance. So if you take in too much, then you got to give back. You got to do something. You do something for yourself, you got to do something for somebody else. That's how you find happiness. And John Rockefeller had to learn that the hard way. After he accumulated what's probably the equivalent of $30 billion, he said, maybe I should give a little bit back back and stop being such a.
A
It's what it is.
B
He was a. He was a real dick dude.
A
He was a real.
B
He was the opposite of his pops and be like, yo, shut up and tell me where your pops lives. I want to go meet his other family. Yeah, yeah.
A
It's what it is. Yeah.
B
He tried to. He tried, probably tried to influence the son. Say, hey, man, loosen up a little bit, dude. Yeah, you don't have to control everything you control freak. Like, look, I got two families. I beg chicks on the road. Yeah, I sell people oregano pills. I'm having a blast. I'm loosey goosey. I'm loose as a goose and I'm having a good time. Yeah, you got stomach fucking problems. You're trying to control the world. Is it worth it?
A
It's not worth it. That's why my philosophy is go at every day gently. Yes, just go at everything gently. Whatever career you're in, have a gentle day. That's my advice for you today, folks. Have a gentle day. Be gentle with yourself and just be gentle with your job. Be gentle with your children. Just go at things gently. And that's the key to life, guys. This podcast episode sponsored by BlueChew. BlueChew is an online service that delivers the same active ingredients in Viagra, Cialis and Levitra, but at a fraction of the cost. Cuz. And it's in chewable form because you know that that's how I need it. Because I can't swallow pills, even though I can swallow. The best part, it's all done online, folks. That means no visits to the doctor office, no awkward conversations, and no waiting in line at the pharmacy. The process is so simple. You just sign up@bluechew.com, consult with one of their licensed medical providers, and once you're approved, you get the prescription within days. And you want to know what my favorite, favorite, favorite part about BlueChew is other than just having erections all day, every day is? It's made in the usa, folks. Okay, cuz, so that gets me even harder. Look, here's the truth, okay? Bluechew wants men rock, rock hard, folks. That's what they want and that's what they'll get. They've told me that's the mission, is just to get guys out there absolutely rock hard. They will not stop until every man is bricked up like a brick house. Every tent is pitched, every rod is raised. Discover your options@bluechew.com as a matter of fact, I want you to take pictures of that rock hard piece and send it at us. Send it out to history hyenas. We want to see it. And we're going to pick one of those winners, just like we picked the ppw.
B
Yeah, that'll be the real P of the week.
A
And we've got a special deal for our audience for you Guys, listening. For anyone who's a biological male who's listening, it doesn't matter, as long as you have a piece and can get hard. This product is for you. Try BlueChew for free. You just pay $5 shipping at checkout when you visit BlueChew.com that's BlueChew.com to receive your first month free. Visit BlueChew.com for more details and important safety information. And we thank BlueChew for sponsoring the history Hyjitas. What's the best time of day to get a deal? All day with Jack in the box's all day big deal meal. You get to choose from four entrees like the supreme croissant and five tasty sides, plus a drink starting at $5. So hurry in or take your time. You've got all day at Jack. Every bite's a big deal right there. Things are fine. Okay? Things are fine. And I just think you proceed with caution. Remember, remember the. Hold on. I'm going to read you a quote right now. Okay? I'm going to read you a quote. Here we go.
B
And while you say that. Yeah. While you pull it up, I'll just say this. You know, you know, you know how crazy the placebo effect is. I've been thinking about this. Yeah. It's like people in the placebo group always got like a large portion of them always get better.
A
Yeah.
B
So I was thinking like, if you don't believe in God, God, just believe in God for the placebo effect.
A
Just do it. Yeah.
B
Just go, hey, things are going to be okay. And then you're going to feel better, baby. It's a no lose situation.
A
Lieutenant Lollipop.
B
Yeah.
A
Let me tell you something.
B
Talk to me, Sergeant Snuggles.
A
Sergeant Snuggles and Lieutenant Lollipop, we're here right now. We're at war.
B
Yeah.
A
Lieutenant Lollipop and Sergeant Snuggles have shown up. Remember this one thing, when we show.
B
Up, it becomes a self help podcast.
A
Plus, perception is reality, okay? Perception is reality and reality is a suggestion. And reality is a suggestion. So you know why? If you're somebody who judges yourself all day, every day, you know why you're probably doing that? Because you're judging others. So stop judging others. And then therefore, you will stop judging yourself. And remember this one little quote from Anthony Hopkins. Today is the tomorrow you were worried about yesterday. So just stay friendly with your president and be gentle.
B
You're so right, though. Whatever you're doing hard to others is just a projection of how you feel on the inside 100%. Because we're all just trying to figure out we're all human and none of us are Jesus Christ.
A
None of us are Jesus Christ at all. Even culture, it's like we're all have a little bit of culture. Look at, look at us right now. Yeah, look at us.
B
We got our, we got our socks and shoes off.
A
We got our socks and shoes off. Okay. We have. We're motivated, like Germans. We're cutthroat. So, okay, that probably's gotta go on Patreon.
B
Give that three way shock. Just clean that up.
A
And that one's gonna get edited out and put on the Patreon because that one we can't say. And Christian, if you're watching, don't make that a clip.
B
Yeah, yeah. But I think that one you way shocking, which is way shocking.
A
I'm just around.
B
Yeah. You're a kid who works in a fire.
A
You don't know what's going on and let me bounce.
B
Yeah.
A
I'm just flattered.
B
Educated in John D. Rockefeller's system. All you know is how to show up for work.
A
Let's show up for work and let's bow and let me find, let me balance it out. And you know, we're, we're stupid kids. Like.
B
Yeah.
A
Got a lot of problems to it. I'm just kidding around where we're asked.
B
Yeah, that's it. I mean, you know, that's it. I got a GED and I became a fireman. And that's all I know. Yeah. Like I said, there's America and other. And that's all I know. That's what it is. That's all I know.
A
So, you know, monopolies. The gay monopoly was created after John D. Rockefeller. Monopolies are a big problem with mostly Americans. American society is the one who we create the most monopolies. People say Amazon right now is a monopoly. People. By the way, speaking of Amazon, John D. Rockefeller at his Height was worth $460 billion. If you adjust that for inflation, it's about $4 trillion. The richest man on the planet is Jeff Bezos. He's worth, I think about. What is it, like a hundred billion? I think it's.
B
Musk is the richest.
A
Musk is the richest. But what's 250? But whatever Musk is, I, I saw this. Whatever Musk's net worth is, if you just for inflation, John D. Radcallow is three times as wealthy as him.
B
Yeah.
A
So the money was stupid.
B
Yeah, it was stupid money. The kid had what they Call Arab money.
A
Yes.
B
He had Arab.
A
Yes. And I'm going to tell you something, just give you a little tidbit right now. A lot of his money was kind of. He created his wealth off perception. And he created a nasty little lie that the oil is going to run out, when in fact the oil is not going to run out. Survey says that's a lie. It's not going to run out. And I'm going to prove it. And I got stories to prove it at the Patreon.
B
Yeah. That. I don't know if that's a fact. I don't know if we'll get community noted for that. But it depends on what you read.
A
It depends.
B
People say we'll run out in like 50 years.
A
Oh, yeah. Because we're trying to not get demonetized again.
B
Yeah.
A
So what should I. How do I make that cleaner for you?
B
I think I just cleaned it up.
A
Okay. You cleaned it?
B
I cleaned it up. Yeah. I think that's an opinion that you could find on Charlie Kirk Show.
A
Yeah, it's what it is, cuz. And make no mistake, it's cost Elon Musk $334.3 billion to move his hairline up 2 inches. He really has what it is, guys.
B
As dad Soda would say, the kids got nice hair, tits. Yeah, that's a good one. When he was younger and he. His head look like a public toilet seat.
A
Yeah.
B
And now he really fixed it up. You can do that now. Yeah. And I would recommend that too. Everyone needs to do what they got to do for confidence. If you got your. Get your feet fixed. Get your feet fixed now.
A
Do you think if it was available.
B
If I got to get my eyes pulled apart, I will do it.
A
Do you think if. If it was available to rock John D. Rockefeller's children at the time, they would have also, because they've been so stressed out by their dad, would have also started going trans one by one, I think. So you think they would have?
B
Yeah. Because what happens is there's one kid who just kind of rejects. There's always a black sheep. And I think he was one of grandkids. Right? Was it the grandkids? And here's the. Just the way the cookie gets smashed on the floor sometimes. The. The family's got all the money in the world. They've given everything away. But one of his grandkids just got eaten by cannibals. And that's just how the cookie crumbles.
A
I did not know that. Is that a conspiracy?
B
Q.
A
That's A fact.
B
That's a fact.
A
So that's a truth. Bader Ginsburg.
B
That's a truth. Bader Ginsburg is just. One of the Rockefellers was just eaten by tribal.
A
Pull that up.
B
Yeah, it's just how it goes sometimes.
A
I did not know that. Well, did not know that.
B
So if you're so concerned and you think you're in charge and you think you're more in charge of the universe and you think you're more in charge of God and all you're concerned about is your legacy and family money, at some point the universe is going to go, we need a little balance and one of your kids is going to be eaten by other human beings.
A
It's what it is. We have from the book Savage Harvest by Carl Hoffman. Rockefeller's grandson, Michael Rockefeller was 23 years old. Old. And he went missing while filming a documentary in New Guinea. And his catamaran overturned in heavy tides and he was never seen again. So he could have been swallowed up by the ocean or by tribesmen.
B
Now he was that. That they're trying to say. They try to make it look nice. But the kid was eaten by a headhunting native tribe. Yeah, see that's right there.
A
See that's the thing with rumors circulated.
B
That he was killed because he was right. Yeah. Because they don't want it out there going to. Rockefeller was killed by. It was eaten. Yeah, but the kid got eaten up.
A
Yeah, he got eaten up. And when you have that much money like Rockefeller, you can make the media and the press say whatever you want. So they created this catamaran story when in fact the kid got eaten big.
B
Yeah. So here it is. Hoffman traveled to New guinea to investigate the disappearance. He recorded witness accounts and found documentation that believes was covered up. He concluded that Rockefeller was killed and eaten by the Asmat. Cuz those kids saw him and they said, wow, wow, wow, we're having a fancy dinner tonight.
A
It's what it is, guys.
B
We're eating meat.
A
Meat, eating meat. Cuz got a lot of protein.
B
And you know, his was Kobe beef because he was a rich kid. So it was Kobe beef.
A
It was Kobe.
B
Yeah, they ate that kid.
A
And it was. And it was a. And. And that. I mean, yeah, man. I mean you don't want to get eaten by cannibals. Oh, look at him. He kind of does look yumsicles.
B
Yeah, he does look yumpsicles. And look at the guys he's hanging out with. Those are guys.
A
Yeah, those guys.
B
Those guys got different opinions.
A
Wait a second. That guy That's a real person in the background. Make that picture bigger. Yeah. That is wild that that guy's in the background of that picture. Oh, my God. Put that picture up. Could you imagine seeing that? I mean. Yeah, that guy wants to eat people.
B
Yeah. I mean, it's just. You're hanging out with a tribe that has different opinions on what cuisine is.
A
I mean, you can see the way they're looking at it.
B
They're going, yeah, yeah, yeah. Take pictures of us. Yeah, fine.
A
Poured salt.
B
Yeah, yeah. Salt on his head. They were getting ready.
A
I mean, the way this guy is smiling is like. That's kind of the way I look at fetuccini Alfredo. Yeah, it's exactly.
B
He's looking. And look at the guy behind him. He's pouring salt on. He said he's getting ready. He doesn't even know he's putting salt on his head.
A
Wow.
B
So it's just how it goes sometimes. You just can't control everything.
A
It's. You can't control anything. And they're gonna act like how they're gonna act, man. And they go, and do you think that there was something inside this kid Michael Rockefeller said, they're gonna love me. I'm a Rockefeller. And then he forgets that. They don't even know what that is. They don't know. They know what rocks are, but not fellas.
B
Yeah. No, they just don't know what's going on. It's like going through the hood and asking them what they thought about swimming in the Olympics. They just didn't watch it.
A
They didn't know.
B
They don't know. Yeah.
A
Do you think that they go to.
B
The hood and saying, what are your favorite Bruce Springsteen hits? Yeah. They just don't listen.
A
My question is, do you think the Asmats in the middle of the Amazon tribe that did, in fact, eat John D. Rockefeller's son, grandson, Michael Rockefeller? Do you think that they have anxiety and depression and need to practice radical acceptance?
B
No, I don't think so. They don't.
A
I don't think they do.
B
They don't have a lot of free time in between trying to find white guys to eat.
A
Yeah.
B
And berries to forage. Yeah. And women to discipline.
A
That's the thing. Because if they're going to be cutting their peepees off, it's not to go transits to eat them.
B
It's to eat.
A
That's what they call an appetizer.
B
Appetizer. Yeah. These kids are totally in the moment when they're trying to catch a fish with A wooden spear.
A
Now, do you think right now, as we're speaking right now, the asthma or other undiscovered tribes or discovered tribes, will they eat each other when they die? You think the cannibalism is a part of their life? Or they just wait for.
B
I know. Do they?
A
Because they only ever eat.
B
Yeah, I think. I think no. I don't know. I think. No, they do eat. I think they do eat, those people.
A
Yeah, they'll eat each other.
B
I think they. I think some of them will. I think it's been documented that some of them will. Not all of them, but I think it's like sushi night. It's just. Yeah, it's just like when you get General Tso's chicken and you ask. It's just better. Yes. It's less. Less gritty. It's just the people showed up and they just. They put them in a walk and they did what they had to do. And they had a great night. Yeah, they had a great night. They ate well and they loved it.
A
And they loved it.
B
Yeah. That kid just disappeared. And that's just how it goes.
A
That's just how it goes.
B
And as you would say, that's the cookie, and it's crumbled.
A
That's the way the cookie has crumbled. Folks, listen, I don't make the rules, but I do play by them.
B
Yeah.
A
And playing by the rules tells me you can't go take pictures of cannibals.
B
You just. That's not a good.
A
It. Do it.
B
Yeah. It's just not a thing you want to put on your bucket list. No, no. You want to do things like, hey, I want to see Shanghai. Yeah. That's a good thing to have on the bucket list.
A
It's what it is.
B
Yeah. Hey, I'd love to come and see the hyenas live. That's a good thing. On the bucket list. Yes. We go and hang out with the Asmat and try to connect with those people and say, hey, have you guys heard of trigonometry?
A
It's what it is.
B
It's probably not a great idea.
A
No, they don't care at all. They don't care at all. They don't care that he was. Looks like a guy that was campaigning for Kamala. Yeah.
B
I mean, look how wild those guys are.
A
That's what it is.
B
Those guys. Those guys.
A
Because what did I used say about.
B
No idea what buildings are. Yeah.
A
Cuz. What did I used to say about you? That you look like you're campaigning for Democrat.
B
Yeah, I Used to say I look like a hot shot campaign, hot shot Democrat campaigner that knocks door to door, knock door.
A
That's what he looks like, make no mistake. Because one of these days you're going to knock on the wrong cannibals door.
B
This is what happens. Because. Because he looks like one of these kids, right? I was in Portland, Maine this weekend and one of the jokes I said was like, where is it for? For the first of all, I said, am I in rainbow Ukraine? Because wherever you go, you like, you're like a real area. You're just like, there's flags of other countries there.
A
That's what it is.
B
You got a Republican area, it's America. And the other ones is just all rainbow Ukraine.
A
Yeah. So, yeah, I had a bit like that too. I said everywhere you go, it's. Everywhere I go, I see rainbow flags and Ukrainian flags. I said, am I in downtown gay Kiev? Yeah, yeah, that's what I said. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. That's what it feels like where you are in New York City or any of these Democratic places. It's just rainbow flags on Ukrainian flags.
B
And here's the ironic thing is like, it's the least. One of the least diverse places I've been. It's so fucking white up there. I was like, did migrants even like the migrants all came to New York. I'm going, we got plenty of Venezuelans here. Yeah, like keep going to Portland, Maine. They will welcome you.
A
Welcome.
B
And you guys are talking about diversity. Why don't you practice a little bit? Practice what you preach.
A
Did you get a lobster?
B
I didn't get a lobster because it was rainy and cold. Yeah, but.
A
Yeah, but you could still go out in the rain and cold and get a lobster.
B
No, I would have only done it if you were there because I know that would have been a mission for you, like, let's get some lobster. But you know, when I'm around, I'm just like, you know what I'm going to do? I'm just going to sit in this hotel room and be a lazy Greek.
A
Piece of what it is. Because, yeah, you're. Yeah, you were. Yeah, you. If I was there, we would be on Viator, the tour site that I love to go, and we go on via tour and we would be on walking tours and we'd be finding cute history in and around Portland, Maine.
B
Yeah.
A
So you didn't go out at all?
B
I love fudgeing, hunting for cute shit like that.
A
Yeah, I'm a cute hunter. But you. So you stayed in Your hotel room Most of the time.
B
I walked around. I walked around, I saw the city. Everyone there. It's like a L.L. bean catalog come to life. Everyone either looks like they're going to throw a rock through a fudgeing Starbucks window, or they're an extra in Yellowstone. And there's really nothing in between.
A
Yeah, that's just watching Yellowstone.
B
I love Yellowstone.
A
Did you watch last night's episode?
B
I like what you told me about John Dutton. You said if you. You know, that the kid definitely voted Republican.
A
Oh, 100%. And I actually. I actually think that Kevin Costner himself came right out and said he voted Republican.
B
Yeah.
A
I mean, he's got a ranch in Montana, and those kids just. They don't. Yeah, they just want a wall.
B
Yeah.
A
Yeah.
B
They just want. They want a lot of things. They want a lot of things that. That the Kamala Harris does not want. And that's just how it goes.
A
Yeah, it's. Make no mistake, some of these kids who have these big ranches in Montana, if they saw Kamala walking on the property, they would be looking at her like an asmat's looking at Michael Rockefeller. Yeah, it's what it is. Food's here. Yeah, dinner's here.
B
John D. Rockefeller. If you went up to John D. Rockefeller and asked him what we should do with all these disenfranchised people, he'd look at you like you was speaking Chinese.
A
Yeah.
B
Like sometimes when my daughter talks to me and I go, listen, I don't speak Chinese.
A
That's what it is.
B
She's like, speak to me in English. He would not even.
A
He wouldn't know what to do. He would go. He would do it. He would. Because he's a Catholic kid, so he would have an impure authority, go like this. And then he'd. He'd go, throw them in the oil.
B
Yeah, he would just go, put them in the oil.
A
Put them in the oil.
B
Them into oil.
A
Make them fossil. Make their bones can be fossil fuels.
B
By the way, oil is not dinosaur juice. That's another myth.
A
That's.
B
It's most.
A
That's. That's a myth that it is not dinosaur juice. And that's a myth from the dinosaur Jews.
B
That's from the dinosaur Jews created that. Yeah. Dinosaurs like algae and like plant. That's why most of it's from the sea. There is a little organic matter on the land, but most of it's from the sea. It's all algae.
A
The deepest. The deepest we've ever found. A fossil fossil is 16,000ft below sea level. That's the deepest anyone humans have ever found. A fossil where we drill for oil is 30,000ft below the surface. So that right there, this idea that it's coming from the fossils doesn't make sense when the fuel and the oil is 16,000ft deeper than the deepest place we've ever found a fossil. So that's what it is, that the fossil fuels, they're not from fossils, and that's not what the oil is. But I'm going to explain that where we can on patreon, because on YouTube, that's just. We're going to get flanked for misinfo. So, Giannis, can you save the YouTube and just say that. That what I'm saying is a lie?
B
Yeah. What he's saying is an absolute lie. And on Patreon, we will read it because we'll be able to pull it up and read it right off the screen.
A
Yeah, we'll be able to read it right up on the screen. And we'll also be able to play word for word, the audio of an actual state senator just proving what I said was right. But for YouTube on here, we're going to say it's Misinfo, Ukraine.
B
Now, I do think the movie There Will Be Blood could have partially or in total been about John D. Rockefeller.
A
I think that it probably was your milkshake.
B
That could have been how the kid was. I Drink it up.
A
Yeah. ABC Wednesdays, Tim Allen and Kat Dennings star in the new family comedy Shifting Gears.
B
Dad, I'm broke and I need a place to stay until I figure out.
A
What the rest of my life looks like. So a couple of days when his.
B
Daughter moves back in.
A
The last time you walked out that.
B
Door, you looked back at me and gave me a double bird. I was 18. The double bird was how I ended all our conversations.
A
The wheels come off.
B
Can we try to talk to each other like rational adults? Have you watched the news lately? That's not a thing anymore.
A
New Wednesdays, 8, 7 Central on ABC and stream on Hulu. Yeah, yeah. John D. Rock. Here's the thing, though. I mean, these guys. John D. Rockefeller, you know, again, extremely wealthy man. There's no way to two things are true. Okay. Money absolutely does buy you happiness. Okay. To a point. Okay. The fact to say, like the money, it to a. It can definitely help you out. You want to make a little bit of money.
B
It takes one thing off the. Yes, the unhappiness.
A
Money doesn't solve all problems, but it solves a lot of them.
B
Yeah. Like a bad heart.
A
Like. Yes. But money also does corrupt in a way that. I mean, it's the most corrupt thing. And there's no way you. When you see someone. When you see philanthropy in the wealthy, that's a good thing. But make no mistake, it was instigated within them by a very bad thing that they did. Nobody is sitting there doing the right thing every single day, and then all of a sudden signing, turn around and give everyone a billion dollars. That's because they did really, really bad shit. And they're trying to get penance from whatever the extraterrestrials are that really created this planet.
B
Absolutely. And make zero mistake about it. America was a country that was founded on loot. Looting.
A
Yeah.
B
Everyone came here to loot the. The first colonies.
A
Yeah.
B
It's all about looting. Conquering and colonization is all about looting. And all the immigrants that came afterwards were just here to loot resources. That's why we have, like, a loosey goosey culture that's based on hot dogs and football.
A
Yeah.
B
Because everyone's here to make money. And John D. Rockefeller took that seriously. He came here, you know, what are they, German kids?
A
They were German.
B
And he just said, oil is going to be the future of everything. He was a visionary, so you got to give him that.
A
Yeah.
B
And he got into. And he founded Standard Oil. 1870.
A
Standard Oil, which is still around today. Everywhere you look, there's Standard Oil.
B
Well, they're Standard Oil. But it got broken up eventually, I.
A
Think, in 1911 or 1915, by the antitrust committee.
B
The antitrust committee was like, this is getting a little ridiculous. You own everything. Kids, slow down. Yeah.
A
Because you have some people who do speak out and still to this day say, do not ever work with the Rockefellers or descendants of the Rockefellers, because they are very, very, very bad people.
B
Like, he was controlling the oil market. Market.
A
Yeah.
B
What he would do is he would. The way he got rid of all his competitors was he was a nasty bad boy. He was a naughty boy.
A
He was a naughty boy.
B
He would do evil business practices that were manipulative, and he would go to places that were controlled by other oil companies, and he would just lower the price. And he'd lose money because he owned other things until he put them out of business, and then he jacked the price right back up. That was one of the things he did.
A
So he was like, no, I'm a good guy. I'm gonna lower the price. Come on, buy the money for me. And then once he got what he wanted, he said, actually, now it's twice as much.
B
Exactly.
A
He said, but with the mobile, he says, fuck you, pay me.
B
And you know what? That's a bit. That's like, still an American thing, right? So, like, that's what Walmart does. They go in. You got all these mom and pop stores. They just go in there. They use the Chinese labor. They offer it for a much lower price that entices all the customers. They lose money on it until they put everybody out of business. And they pull it back.
A
You pull it back.
B
That's what you do.
A
And it's. And. And listen, here's the truth, man. Look, here's the truth. I. Look, here's the truth. Bader Ginsburg. Okay? I used to actually get mad at those types of people and whatever kind of think, oh, I'm. I guess I'm great, because I don't think like that. I don't anymore. What I think about is this. As human beings think of us as one big pie, okay? Different slices of the pie have different mindsets and do different things. Okay? Some people do what these guys do. Some people do what we do. Some people do what you at home do. The ma. The. The truth is this. We're all bees in the hive. We're all bees in the hive, and we're all have different jobs and different things to do, and we're all making honey in different ways, okay? But the next time you go to judge someone, just say, that's a bee in the hive. It's a numbers game. It's a percentage game. There's a percentage of the population that's gonna act like assholes at different points of their life for different times for different reasons. So when you say, see someone acting stupid, you just say, don't get mad at them. Stay friendly with the president. Be gentle with them. Be kind with them. Say, that's just a percentage. They're also. They're a percentage of the population that does that. They're a bee in the hive like me. We're all making honey.
B
We're all making honey. We all got different jobs. That sounds a lot like Plato's Republic, where he thought everyone was just preordained to either be like a philosopher king, a soldier, or slave.
A
Or slave. And you just are who you are. And are. You are. And. And. And if you believe in the Hindus. Yeah, that. And I do. I do believe in some of them.
B
Yeah.
A
I. I think that you get reincarnated and you come back as you. You keep getting different tries here.
B
Yeah.
A
Because the Truth is, there's a theory going around, and I am starting to believe that we were in fact created by a prison planet. And this is a prison planet by a master race that's an alien race, an ancient alien race that has kind of experiment and they feed off our negative emotions. And I think that these extraterrestrials feed off our negative emotions and we are stuck in this loop. And that's why I think monks and people who can get high vibration therapy and can just be so positive all the time, I think that's the only way to break out of this loop. Because I do think there's a good chance that this might be our 25th,000th life, that we. Because we're just, we're. They're eating our negative emotions. So I'm trying to be positive to break out of the prison planet that was created by an ancient alien race.
B
I agree with you 100%, L. Ron Hubbard.
A
It's what it is.
B
We got get these thetans out of our brains.
A
Yeah, it's what it is. Yeah.
B
That's what we have to do.
A
It's what it is.
B
Yeah, yeah, that's that. It's very possible.
A
It's what it is.
B
I mean, because there's aliens. They're saying there's aliens. There's Tic Tacs flying all over the place.
A
Yeah, that's what it is. Because the real reason we have to stop this pod is because I, I went and became a Scientologist. Kicked out recently for being gay.
B
Yeah. Here's my theory. I think the aliens, because everyone goes like, what are they doing? They come here, there's people see them, and then they leave. I think, what if they're jerking off to us because, you know, you, you check. It's like maybe they go to all the planets and they go to the. Like, it's like when, when you surf Porn history.
A
Yeah.
B
Your porn sites, you find one you like, you jerk off and then you disappear because you're ashamed.
A
Yeah.
B
So they close their laptop right after they busted nothing. They're like, I gotta get out of here.
A
They glue it up. They do the sign of the cross, they get a little glue on their head, and then they move on.
B
And then they just move on. That could be what they're doing is just spanking their monkey to us. They could be just doing that.
A
It's what it is. I mean, the, the, the, the wealthy John D. Rockefeller was a part of these wealthy group of businessmen that would meet once a year that they say, these guys are More important than like the G7 summit. They were like the. Basically, the world's billionaires would meet and discuss what's going on politically and kind of influence the presidents and kings and powers that be. But they're the real one world order and the people who run the country and the world are these multi billionaires. And they said that. And for me, it's like those people, if aliens are real more than the president, these guys are going to know who the aliens are and they're going to work with them and try to sell oil to them.
B
That's probably the truth.
A
Seriously.
B
Maybe they're coming to pick up a oil who knows what.
A
Isn't it wild that we're living in a time now where, where 15 years ago. Call it, call it 20 years ago. I'll be more conservative. 20 years ago, if you said publicly aliens are real, people would be like, you're an idiot. Now if you say publicly aliens aren't real, people say, you're an idiot.
B
Right, right.
A
So you think that we're living in the time, but do you think that in this day and age, our lifespan or our children's lifespan, they will be able to, like, it will be confirmed that they're real?
B
Yeah, I think it will. I think it's been confirmed already. Just like all the, the, the evidence, the eyewitness sightings, it's like, why would people make it up? You know those people, Nobody would come say. There's a few, I think charlatans who make it up for attention or whatever, or whatever they're doing. Or people who are a little. I see you're flexing your tits. Yeah.
A
What it is, guys? I just want to let everybody fudge know.
B
Yeah.
A
And I just want you to think that I'm handsome.
B
You're a handsome kid.
A
Thank you. And I. Jesse's just looking at the bottom my feet.
B
But think about it. It's. You don't want anyone to like, go, this guy's crazy. So I think there's some people who are legitimately crazy. You think they've seen the lines? I think there's some charlatans and I think. But I think the majority are like, dude, what do you want me to do? I saw this thing.
A
Yeah. I mean, now you got the U.S. navy pilots. I mean, if you look, if you pull it up, I'm sure you saw this story. The Mexican government. The Mexican government, I. You people could say whatever they want. Oh, Mexico. Make fun of them, whatever. Mexico is at at least a second world country. I would say It's a first world country, Mexico. They. I mean, Mexico City is like going to New York City. Mexico City's politicians, like real people. They had a actual government hearing because they found an alien body. And they were talking about it, like, as if Congress, our US Congress is talking about it. Did you hear that? Do you see that?
B
Well, even in. Yeah, well, the guy testified in front of Congress said, we have biolic. Biologics, whatever it's called. He said, yeah, they've been recovered.
A
You know, so are they doing biological.
B
Creatures that are not human?
A
So are they doing that thing that they say people do that? They say, like, you know, Freemasons have to do, and the One World Order has to do that. They release it in public, and they release it in such a way that they are showing you that it's real, but we're not believing it. The media is not getting behind it, but they're releasing it and saying, you know, but the media is not making a big deal about it. Like, if CNN and Fox News went on and made breaking news, aliens are real. All of a sudden. Now, my mother and all these people, like, it's real. But if they just drop it online or drop it in the New York Public Post, it's just there. But no one's putting effort behind it. So we told you it was real.
B
Yeah. Which makes you wonder. Yeah, it makes you wonder, like, is there an agenda behind every big media push? Because.
A
Yeah, sure.
B
Because the media creates, like, right now, Israel, Palestine, it's all. It's all about fucking Russia. So you're like, is that conflict over? Because all we know is what we hear. We don't know. And then when you find out that he had this influence over the public education system, you're going like, is everybody just trying to make a buck behind the scenes manipulating us at all times? Remember when they were telling us that weed was fudgeing bad for you?
A
And now they love. Are you smoking weed now?
B
I'm not smoking weed.
A
But you're doing edibles.
B
I'm not doing edibles. Okay, but, like, alcohol is really bad.
A
Alcohol is way worse. It kills way more people than weed. But. But that's. And that's another episode we could do. I think it's William Hurst. I think Hearst is the one who was behind alcohol and all that and didn't. And wasn't making enough money off weed, so created all these negative campaigns about weed. Yeah, I think William Hurst is very close to John D. Rockefeller. We could do an EPI webby about him.
B
We're just stupid kids that maybe were made stupid by John D. Rockefeller and very susceptible to marketing and advertising at the, at the behest of. Of rich people's interests. It's just what America. It's just where. The United States of America. The usa. The United States of Advertising.
A
The United States of Advertising. Because. And make no mistake, I mean, sugar should be illegal.
B
It's so.
A
We should not give our children sugar. And instead, not only do we give our children sugar, we reward them with sugar.
B
Yes.
A
And tell them that they, if they do well in school and take them out for ice cream, which is like just giving them heroin. And I'm addicted. I mean, I come in here and have black and whites all the time. I'm addicted to sugar. And even through knowing and saying out loud that sugar is an addictive thing and should be banned, I give it to my kids all the time.
B
Yes.
A
So.
B
So maybe oregano pills really do cure everything. And even if it's the placebo effect, it works.
A
Yeah, it works. Cuz, I mean, cuz you've said the word placebo and loosey goosey seven times in an hour.
B
Because I've been so. I've been so obsessed with the placebo effect recently because I've been reading about it and it just, it's mind blowing. It shows you how powerful the mind is. It's crazy. These people get cured by believing they're getting the right trial of the drug.
A
Yeah.
B
And then they get cured even though they were getting a sugar pill, which what we were just talking about.
A
I forgot my blood pressure medicine in Madison, Wisconsin this weekend. And I called our, our team, our history. Aena's resident physician, Lukash. And he told me it's okay. It's only, it's, it's. He said, dude, it's two days. Yeah, literal two days. You're going to be home on Sunday. It will not. It don't. I'm not going to send you one pill to a random pharmacy in Madison. You're okay. Like, seriously. But in my brain I started to believe I wasn't okay. And I googled the symptoms of what happens if you miss your blood pressure medicine. And I felt like I was. My blood pressure was getting lower and I felt like I was going to pass out on stage and all that. It was in my mind. And then as soon as I got home, the very first thing I did, I pushed my kids out of the way and I ran to the cabinet and I got. And I took my blood pressure pill and within 30 seconds 45 seconds. The most. All my symptoms that I was experiencing for two days went away like that.
B
Yeah.
A
So that wasn't the pill. That was my mind deciding to turn it off.
B
That just shows you how powerful the mind is. You can use it for positive and negative. It just blows my mind that if you get control of your mind, who knows what you can do? You could probably take over the whole world's oil supply.
A
Seriously. Like John D. Rockefeller.
B
Like John D. Rockefeller did. Because he did. So he. And here's the thing that a lot of people don't know when he started with oil.
A
I don't know.
B
Yeah. Is that he started with oil. It wasn't for cause. It wasn't for cause. It was for lights.
A
There was lights and oil. Oil and lights.
B
Yeah. So that was originally why he. He didn't know that cars were coming. He's like, this is gonna. Yeah, this is gonna power the lights. So it was the kerosene. Kerosene became a popular and affordable altern oil.
A
Right. Fueling lamps. So because whale oil was what? Because whale. Because, Jesse, what'd you say about whale oil?
B
That's what they used to light lamps in the house.
A
But you're saying that it was. That was bullshit or so it wasn't. What was the conspiracy with whale oils and kerosene? Wasn't there something you said, you read in the book?
B
Yeah, there was rumors that he spread lies about whale oil being dangerous and it could burn down people's houses as a way to get people to switch over to kerosene.
A
But that was a lie.
B
It was probably something he might have done, but in actuality, it was just cheaper and more affordable and more efficient. Efficient to use crude oil. So.
A
Understood.
B
So he maybe did that as a little bit of a marketing campaign, but to. Again, to get the stupid people on board to understand. But.
A
United States of advertising.
B
But the prices don't lie. And it was just. It was just cheaper. And then the oil boom. Then the. Then the oil boom in America was 1859. It started in Titusville, Pennsylvania, in 1859 by Edwin Drake when he sparked the first. He discovered oil and that sparked the American. American oil bloom, providing a large supply of crude oil that could be refined into kerosene. So he did that first. And then. So John D. Rockefeller saw that and he said, this is going to be the future. He was just a visionary and he just got into that business.
A
It's just. Yeah, yeah.
B
He just, like Schultz saw pods and he was like, I'm getting in.
A
So he Didn't.
B
Yeah, he's a visionary.
A
Yeah, it's, it's so, so he. So in other words. Yeah, because I think he founded Standard.
B
Oil 11 years after oil was discovered. Right.
A
Because he wasn't even going after oil and cars. He had other businesses before, right? He had businesses, yeah. It's interesting. But he was smart. I mean he's always smart, ruthless kind of guy. And I don't know, I mean I think that, I think that, you know, John D. Rockefeller, I still say, you know, people aren't debating about him. I still say he was an American hero. I think he pushed our country, you know, into what it is today. But some people are just really think he was a big dick.
B
Yeah, I think he was a little bit of both. I think he was a three dimensional guy and I think he was extreme both ways if you think about it.
A
But can you be great without being a dick like Michael Jordan? Jordan.
B
I don't think Elon Musk, I'm sure.
A
Stephen Hawking was even a dick. If he could talk.
B
Yeah. I mean, do you think Elon Musk knows all his kids names? No, I don't know. He's got a lot of them. I mean. Yeah. I mean when you look at Steve Jobs, I mean, you know, there's one thing about, we know for sure about his daughter.
A
What?
B
She did not have an iPhone. Yeah, that chick, she went and she got a Samsung immediately. Can you imagine being treated like that by your dad and then looking at an iPhone and having just a trauma response every time you check your email.
A
Wait, Steve Jobs used to.
B
Steve Jobs was a dick to his daughter?
A
I don't know. I don't. What is she? Where is she now?
B
It's like the most known thing. She's probably working for Samsung. Yeah, yeah.
A
He would just call her fat or what would he do?
B
He just disowned her. He just wouldn't pay attention to her. He wouldn't give her any money. Why the biggest. Because he was a dick. The thing about Steve Jobs that everyone says now is like the truth is the guy was a dick.
A
He probably was on the spectrum too, right? A lot of these guys adopted kids. Once you get rejected by your mother, no matter how good of a adoptive mother you have, you are angry. Yes, that's angry.
B
That's why adopted people have a higher rate of criminality. It's just what it is what it is do. It's just something. Yeah. The mother rejection is just a tough one to get over. And unfortunately Steve Jobs's nickname, if he was on this podcast. Would have been Stevie left in a basket.
A
Yeah, it's what it is.
B
The kid was left in a basket at a doorstep.
A
Yeah, we would just call him Stevie Moses.
B
Yeah, Stevie Moses.
A
Moses was just left in a basket.
B
Egyptians, but this is some of the stuff that rock.
A
Thank God he was found by the Egyptians because making no mistake, if Moses was found by the Asmats, the kid would have got eaten.
B
He would have got eaten.
A
He would have got eaten. They would have called that kid a garlic knot and they would have just eaten Moses and we would not have the ten Commandments.
B
He would have been a garlic.
A
Just would have taken it and popped one back. It's what it is.
B
So this is the type of that Rockefeller would do. He would negotiate secret deals with railroads to receive discounts on shipping his oil. He even secured drawbacks where rail railroads would charge his competitors the full price but give a portion of that money to Standard Oil. Yeah, so it's wild. He, like became a partner with the railroad and was taking money unbeknownst to his competitors for the railroad shipping their oil. So the kid was making money everywhere.
A
Everywhere you could go.
B
These arrangements, like, gave him just such a. A financial advantage. Another thing he would do is he would systematically buy out competitors or force them to sell through aggressive tactics by acquiring smaller companies, companies, he consolidated the oil refining industry under his control. And at that point, he controlled 90% of the U. S. Oil refining markets. He also set up like trusts and like that and had companies own companies that own companies, like, own companies, shell companies like the little Russian dolls going in each other. So he just avoided taxes. And here's another thing. Was he a good kid or was he like, you know what my tax bill is going to be with all this philanthropy? Because I'm going to break even, Stephen, because when you do good things, you sign a Salvation army ticket and you say, gave a bunch of poor people computers and they say, you don't know anything in taxes.
A
Yeah, it's smart. Even Steven, the thing is, is like, yeah, so he was, you know, he was playing. He played by the rules of the US Government. Again, he's saying, I didn't, I didn't make the rules, but I'm playing by.
B
Well, here's the deal. In a lot of ways, he did make the rules because he was such a rich guy. He would meet with the politicians and say, hey, do you guys like steak or do you like whale or human? Yeah, do you like, boy?
A
Got it.
B
I got it for you. Yeah, you like adrenochrome, Bloody Marys.
A
What do you want?
B
What do you want? I'll give it to you. I just need you to sign these bills that say we're not going to fucking regulate or break up my monopolies and just look the other way and let me just run the world.
A
Yeah. Just let me do it. Let me run the world, and we'll see what happens. Because, yeah, these. You know, I think that he was just a kid that, you know, these monopolies, I mean, they. They tried to get him many, many times, but the kid. The kids could just. Not. Nobody could, you know, pin him, you know, arrest him or put him in jail or anything. The government tried. Different people in the government tried to get jobs. Johnny D. But they couldn't because, like Giannis said, he probably made the rules. He had every politician in his pocket. And my thing is, like, look, you could be mad at the kid. I get it. But I don't know. He started out with nothing. His father was a criminal, and he made himself this way. It's not like he was born into this shit. I get mad at the people who were born into the money.
B
Yeah.
A
That's annoying to me. And then they act like dicks. But if you made it on your own, you could be a scumbag to me.
B
Yeah.
A
I don't know. You're better than me.
B
You got it. You got to. You got to. You know, you can't. You can't. You're not starting at the starting line. You're starting behind the starting line.
A
Yeah. So it's fine.
B
So it's okay. What he would also do is. This is wild. He would gather intelligence on competitors. So he would hire. He would hire spies in the other companies, pay them, and so they would work for the other companies, but he would pay them more. So he would just find out the way they were moving. And so he was able to undercut suppliers.
A
Yeah.
B
Pressure banks, deny loans to competitors. I mean, he had spies in everywhere. So basically, he was like. He had his own Gestapo.
A
Yeah.
B
So he had had people working for him who worked at the bank, and so when the other competitors came in for loans, he would just go deny that loan.
A
Yeah.
B
So he had his tentacles and everything. The kid was God.
A
It was God and evil God and the. And the kid. What he would do is to hide his money, which is a lot of. Which is what a lot of wealthy people do, is he would buy paintings. So he would buy a lot of paintings. A kid. So. So they think right now, because Somebody said, right. Right now, the Rockefeller fellers on paper don't have enough money to be part of the One World Order and to be ruling the world. They're worth about 11 billion, which is a lot of money. But there's people. That's not real money these days. But they say, however, they still might be influencing the real world because nobody knows how much money they actually have, because over the last hundred years, they've bought assets like paintings and other things that can't really be traced. So they may have more money than you can even imagine, but it's just not on paper.
B
It's in Switzerland, it's in the Cayman Islands. It's in different places where it's just outdoors. Side of the jurisdiction's in the stomach of the asmaps, for sure. Yeah. And much. He's kind of like, the way I look at him, he's kind of like the McMahon the way McMahon was for wrestling, because that's what he. That's what McMahon would do. Vince McMahon would go to these places that had other wrestling organizations and put on big shows and just sell cheaper tickets. And he just ruled it like a dictator. The WWF and then the wwe, the same way Dana White is ruling the ufc. And it puts out a good product. I mean, the kid put out a good product, even though he was doing all these manipulation, manipulative practices. And the way he justified it when he came under scrutiny was he said, listen, these practices are necessary to create efficiency and stability in a chaotic market. So said, like a true German, it's what it is. Yeah. I don't really believe in democracy. I am your fuel.
A
Yeah.
B
And that's just what it is. And follow me and get in line and be a good worker. And that's what life's about, is getting the job done. Get it done.
A
And that's why he got it done. And he got it done in very, very crazy, wild ways where a lot of people died. And we're going to Talk that@patreon.com history Hyenas in a moment. But first we're going to read the members of the newest members of the matriarchy who have made. Who have made whatever name they wanted. But the funnier they are, the higher the chance they get to be added to the list and become our PPW Pseudo Penis of the Week. Because hyenas have pseudo penises and that's what they give birth out of. And then we have that lucky winner goes on history hyenas is back.com, our website that has all the information about us up there, the lingo. If you're confused about some of the words we're saying, go to history hyenas is back dot com. We got all our lingo up there. We have our merch up there, which will be adding new merch soon. We should put our tour dates up there too.
B
Yeah, we should.
A
We should put our tour dates up there. I'll be in Phoenix, by the way, in December and then I got Miami at the end of December and Cobbs in February in San Francisco and go to ChrisDComedy.com right now for tickets. But we will put our the dates up on history hyenas is back.com as well.
B
Yeah, we really should.
A
Yeah. Tell them what you're going to be.
B
I'm gonna be. I'm gonna be in Milwaukee, guys. I'm gonna be in Milwaukee.
A
Oh, speaking of getting eate.
B
Speaking of getting eaten. Speaking. Speaking about getting eaten. I will be in Milwaukee, which is going to be good. And that is December. December 6th and 7th. And then I'm going to be in Bridgeport, Connecticut, December 13th and 14th with.
A
That criminal Vinnie Brand.
B
Yes, yes. And then you could. You could see me at the comedy mothership December 20th to the 22nd. And then a bunch of other dates in the new year. Go to Giannis Pappas comedy dot com.
A
Absolutely. And we will throw those dates. History is back dot com. But right now, patreon.com history is here are the new members of the matriarchy. All right, let's start it up. The cute and the fumeless. Dares Bagio.
B
I like that guy.
A
On. Not on the list, but a good, good one.
B
Good one to start. Yeah.
A
Pseudo Leroy. Two girls. No cup Rip V Free mm rip.
B
V. I like that part. I'm gonna give him a Drexler.
A
Drexler.
B
Drexler.
A
John Gorzak. Then we got I'll kiss the tip if hh get back back together.
B
Okay. That's a Drexler. Just because his dreams came true and now he's got to touch the tip.
A
Nicholas Elliott, Gaddam's. Then we got Tyler burros. Then we got Queefer Sutherland.
B
You know what to do.
A
Yeah, that's on the list. That's the kind of talent we want. That's the kind of things that we want. Quee for Sutherland is a 10.
B
Yeah, that's a automatically a contender.
A
And it's very unique.
B
Yes, very unique. And that's automatic. Yeah, Jesse loves. It's automatically a contender. Yeah.
A
See, then we got a name here. That this kid's just going with his real name. But. And this makes me happy, but also nervous. We got Muhammad Ahmad. So that's good. I'm happy that everyone's coming. But just know that we're joking around. We love the Prophet. We love everything about being Muslim. We love it.
B
Yes, we do, Dan.
A
Then we got Aan Shakam. Oh, they're enemies.
B
Yeah, definitely.
A
Oh, look at this. Then we got Ludwig Brownlund. Oh. Oh, wow.
B
We got a German kid, Munich.
A
Then we got Jill Knickerbocker. Dennis. Then we got Punching. Chrissy's uvula. Gave my pseudo penis chlamydia.
B
Okay, that's just more of a fact.
A
Yeah. Connor Cosentino. Jacob Roshaw. John Mike Valucci. Then we got Monsignor William Christian. Long Hauler iii.
B
Okay, okay.
A
Matt Swope. Then we got. That's not p. That squirt.
B
Chicken Finger.
A
Chicken.
B
Chicken Finger is a list. I mean, be happy. Yeah.
A
Then we got an A list. Celebrity Sam Elliott.
B
Oh, Sam Elliott.
A
Welcome. Thank you, Sam. Then we got don't fire until you see the pinks of their Ulus Drexler.
B
That was close. It's a good one.
A
Justin Wallace. Rob Tom. Mokashulk. Kunja Rop. Then we got Lakeside Maple in my faji, but not while my dad is alive. Work those triceps. Character piece.
B
He got a lot in there. It's a good one. That's a good one.
A
And it's called Stuff Back. Shout Out Lakeside. Yeah.
B
Give me Drexler for that.
A
B. Villas D. Heller. Then we got Trevor Pimento, Anaya McClinton, Bill Simpson, Marcos Linares. Then we got Bull Books. Jerry, Franco Bussolini, Corey Sanchez. Then we got Full Bean White flock him to a town near your character piece.
B
Okay.
A
Shelferton.
B
Oh, wow.
A
And then we have Donald J. Trump.
B
Oh, there you go.
A
Donald J. Trump. Welcome.
B
It could really be him.
A
Yeah. Welcome, sir.
B
Yeah.
A
Sir President Donald J. Trump. Spencer Williams. Then we got Jock strap protecting the fumy jewels between Chrissy D's hockey player hips.
B
I mean, put them on the list, okay? Yeah, put them on the list.
A
You made it.
B
Put him on the list.
A
Then we got beans. 007F are back for a long time.
B
Yeah, yeah, yeah. Give him a Drexler.
A
June Ham, Christopher. Then we got Sam, Ashley, Hernan Perez, Mitch. Then we got Ed. I beat off with my left chicken finger. Good. Then we got James from Long island, with respect, okay. Then we got James from Long island, with respect. Okay.
B
Okay.
A
Can't do that. Security. Okay. That wasn't too bad. But again, we can't even come close to disparaging the family. So you're okay, but you do have security. You've been ushered to the.
B
That was a twofer. You know what that was?
A
Yeah.
B
You walked. Walked into one. And then we had to call security.
A
Yeah, that's what.
B
That's. Two things happened.
A
Then we got Chrissy D. Eats intermits but still has puffy nips.
B
Yes.
A
Again, more of a fact.
B
Yeah.
A
Otaniel Castro. Almir.
B
Wait, wait. Otanio Castro.
A
Oh, Otanio Castro. I think his name is Otanio. Yeah, he didn't put otan. I thought he was Otani Castro. That would have fun. Mike J. Comedy Dragon. Then we got Chase Rempel. Ooh. Duster Joey. Then we got Anthony Rizzo. Benzo's chin. First base for the Yankees. Ryan Matt. No. Joey Gonzalez. Then we got Vinnie the Jew. Small hog. Life fumes.
B
Okay.
A
Drexler, Stephen Bartolone, Michael Klosky, Brendan Parker. Schwam face. Salsa 96. Austin Faircloth, Manuel Frasisco, Nicholas Diamond. Then we got the first guy, Chris Will, after Tampatoni dies.
B
Yeah, put him on the list.
A
Okay, we're on the list.
B
Let's create it.
A
Let's create it. Creative.
B
Yeah.
A
Ryan Troller, Amandu Thompson. Having fun with my pseudo glue gun. Then we got Hardy Farty from GHB Baby. Okay, here we go. Hardy Farty from GHB Baby Oil at Diddy's Lemon Party.
B
It's a good one.
A
Good one. Bad read.
B
Bad read, but a good one. It's a strong Drexler, Jansen Cantrell.
A
Then we got Pete Buttigieg's Hog Hunter Drax.
B
Real good.
A
But. Yeah, these are.
B
These are good.
A
These are the list of the Drexlers, man. But that's good. But that. That. We got competition as well.
B
Yeah, it means it's very competitive. But Queef or Sutherland's gonna be hard to beat. Yeah, I'll tell you that.
A
Matthew Klopp, Keith Carter, Anthony C. Kyle Brown. Then we got Paulie. Donnie in the high vis. Hold on. Donnie in the high viz is my kind of biz. Fruit cups. Bad read. I'm sorry. I couldn't read it.
B
It's okay. It's a tough one to read.
A
Yeah. Spencer Coppock, Ronald Lynch, Alex Went Paul. Trey Gerhart, Antonio Alagna, Wilkie's Tavares. JD Vance's Couch Chicken Figure. The King Lad. Roman Munos, Yusuf obiid. Wow, we got a lot of muzzies in here. Welcome.
B
Yeah, we Bring everybody in.
A
Benjamin Boren, Yousef Obi. Roman Munoz, CJ Joyce, Riley DiLoretta, Adam Summers, Kyle Johnson, Yanni P. Went on JRE and didn't once mention Chrissy D. We got to see those text messages. It's what it is.
B
Put on the list. Put one of the list.
A
List. Walked into one. List.
B
Walked into what? Is what? It's a list. It's funny.
A
Yeah. Okay. Then we got Micro P P. Penis Poets.
B
List. List, list, list. Okay. You made it. Yeah.
A
List. Brian. Then we got your border is looser than your mother's box. Put them on the list.
B
Wow.
A
Okay, so now we're.
B
This is fucking Bag, bag, bag, bag.
A
Ok. Make no mistake, my piece isn't small. But make no mistake, it's not big either.
B
It's what it is, what it is. Okay, that's a. Yeah, it's a funny one though.
A
Gary Grabler. Then we got Paul Revere. Paul Revere. I'll put it in your rear, but I'm no queer. Trump 2024.
B
Put them on the list. Jesus Christ. We got a lot of goodies.
A
Yeah, it's kids shouting out the founding fathers. Yeah. 365. Joshua Guthy Jarvis, Anthony Constakis. Anthony Niddala. My camera. Okay.
B
Walked into what?
A
Walked into one. Get the security. Okay. Yep. That's what it is, guys. Yeah, Funny one. Yeah, it's a funny one. But I did walk into one.
B
Yeah, security.
A
Yeah, just a. Okay. Oh, just a. Screwed in Irish. Jewish potato pancake monkey. And he didn't write the word screwed. He put an emoji of a screw.
B
All right. Yeah, we're going to give him a nice little Drexler for that.
A
Spaz. Daddy Slim. James Nester, Kyle St. Germain, Douglas Brucker, Timothy Birchfield, Mahumad. Wow. Neat. Darius T.T. jerry. Pseudo penis. Okay. It's a good one. Walked into one.
B
Okay, Walked it away.
A
Security. But that was good. That's a good one because he does have one. Christian Sandoval, Troy Holland, Kevin Doohan. I mean it was funny. Yeah.
B
Yeah.
A
Then we got back like the Menendez brothers.
B
Yeah. Because trans people are kind of like human hyenas.
A
They are human hyenas. I mean we, you, we said. You said. They're the first original trans of hyenas. Then we got Crawford Sloan, Lauren B. Kevin Fart Flow. Then we got get that glue gun way. Sean Sheehan. My keister. You Fanuk. Okay, okay. Blue Torch tv. Screwed in, screwed in, screwed in. Justin Brushi, Fernando Ferreira, Hector Carmano, Michael Dunn. Then we got make no mistake. Chrissy D watches Ricky Lake.
B
Chicken finger.
A
Chicken finger.
B
Definition of a chicken figure.
A
Jam Central Station. Justin. Then we got Stuart Cole. Then we got. Might as well start now. Vance 2028.
B
Yeah. Drexler.
A
Thorough white dude. Ryan. Then we got over the Walla Harris.
B
Wow, wow, wow. That's like an Eminem rhyme scheme. Over the Walla Harris instead of Kamala Harris. Yeah, that's what you call a contender.
A
A contender right there. We got our first contender to quee for Southern.
B
Yeah.
A
Wow, that is.
B
Is inventive.
A
RJ Snyers. Garika. Trent Courville. Demetrios. Tim Crosswaith. Joshua Thomas. Thank God the boys are back. Air Jordan on the runways. Ben Hana. Ben Han is funny like Benny Hana.
B
Yeah.
A
Then we got. Went to the ballot box with two bananas in my ass. To make America great again.
B
You gotta throw them on the list for the funny factor. Yeah, for the funny factor.
A
And he's another one that put an emoji of a banana. He did, right? The word banana. Yeah.
B
The funny fact, it just slings him.
A
On there after these pages. Are we all caught up?
B
No, that's just the election.
A
This is just to the election. Holy shit.
B
Yeah. Listen, we appreciate you.
A
We appreciate. But you guys are just going to have, you know, we get to.
B
You.
A
You know what we might do too? Why don't we do an episode in here where the entire episode is the Patreon names.
B
We could do an additional, like.
A
You know what I mean? Like just an additional bonus content, like.
B
Just to catch up.
A
Raymond Armin. Kharat. H.M. rothschild Medici. Javier Sanchez. Hope. Hobo Donkey. Maggie. Gross.
B
Donkey's a chicken finger.
A
Okay, Sean, I like that one.
B
I like a hobo donkey.
A
Hobo donkey. Sean Davis. Baldy Zach. Mighty War Donkey. Marcus Anderson. Pepin the Short. King of the Franks and Beans. AKA Jan.
B
Okay.
A
Jan the Squeak. Eduardo. Wow.
B
Yeah, Back Drexler for that.
A
Eduardo Aguilar. Then we got. Just for the content. Y.
B
Okay.
A
Carrie Bipsoma. Then we got El podcast con Luis Jimenez and Speedy.
B
That's. That's what you call screwed in, kid. Yeah, it's probably got a podcast and instance Espanol.
A
That's what it is. The Toronto Herald. Oh, wow, the newspapers there. The Toronto Herald.
B
Yeah.
A
Timothy Blanchard. Guavito Chiquito. Destiny Sanchez. Then we got Percy Jack off 69. Shane Todd. Oh, Shane Todd, great comic from Ireland. Then we got Pseudo penis patrol. Anthony Bray. Nathaniel. Then we got Vote Red. Illegal Fumars. Franks and beans. Slko. Yes. Okay. Security. Fat fox.
B
Chicken figure.
A
Chicken figure. Mark. Mingle, wheeze the juice, vinegar, pancake, drippy tip. That's it.
B
Drexer.
A
Drexer. Yeah. Michael Rumple Smaltz. Patrick Higgins. Chainsaw wielding Albanian.
B
It's funny.
A
Yeah. Jillian. It's called Saka. Sheamus. Angel. Dimitri Boyer. Jennifer Hayden. Derek Wayshawn, Combs. Michael. Okay, all right.
B
Good one.
A
We'll do one more. We'll do one more. One more page and then we're almost.
B
There's a challenger. Okay, Another challenger.
A
One more. Okay. Aaron Robert. Finnery. Evan. Just a swarthy Greek Canas. Half black, half tech support. Like a Kamala Bee and white cookie.
B
Contender. Put him on the list. I mean, what are we going to do?
A
All right.
B
Yeah. What are we gonna do?
A
Gay Schlong. CN Cuzzy B. Tootin. Okay.
B
Okay.
A
Joe Macatelli. Christian Brown. Deez Nuts, llc. Paige Cornelius. Back like the clap. Finish on the back like I'm black. Ladder 14.
B
Okay. Funny. Drexler.
A
Funny, funny. Drexler. Security.
B
Security.
A
Joan Giovanezzo. Jiminy Cricket. Jessica L. Aiden McDermott. Alexis Gonzalez. Sam Cispola. Grant Carson. Jamie Devoe. Nick Mulaney. SLO KS. New York Mets FF. Number 14.
B
Okay.
A
Jacqueline Sorao. Wide thighs tell white lies. See you on Grindr, Babe.
B
Drexler.
A
Jay Gold. Steven Rose. Angela Johnson's a piece. I want to grease her crease on my knees and make black and white cookies.
B
Put them on the list.
A
On the list. Johnson. Beautiful Black woman.
B
Yeah.
A
Itchy. Mitchy. Yeah. Landon Diaz. Not that. Hgh. Kristen Pearson. Dane the Tooth. Brazil. Brick City. Dabs Navarro's Construction. Okay.
B
Screwed in.
A
Michael Arborodella Jr. Madeline Hall. Mike Nelson. John Carter. Joe DeRose's Trans Hoagies.
B
Drexler could have been on the list.
A
Okay.
B
There's just too many good ones.
A
Derek Coon Fair. Kamala's Fumes Made. Biden. Franks and Beans. Aiden March. James McLaughlin. Daniel. Nadia Gaddis. Hop Lee Thomas. Phil LaRusso. Lunch with the Bear. And then we got get screwed in and sell brother School Hoodie. You Cyclops.
B
Could Any other time he could have. All right, the list is fat. This is very.
A
The last ones.
B
Yeah. Very fast. Funny.
A
Okay, so here. All right. So that we're almost done. So let me just. Let me just. We'll go with the list.
B
Yeah.
A
Okay. So the list we have is half black, half tech support like Kamala B.
B
And White Cookie Drexler, but really good.
A
Angela Johnson's a piece. Want to grease her crease on my knees and make black and white cookies.
B
Drexlered but man, on any of the list.
A
Okay, any of the list Went to the ballot box with two bananas in my ass to make America great again.
B
Any other list? Drexler.
A
Yeah, then we got micro penis papas.
B
Any other list? Drexler.
A
Okay. Then we got Paul revere. I'll put it in your rear, but I'm no queer. Trump 2024.
B
Any other lists? I mean, seriously, these guys are all. This is like a really tough one.
A
Then we got over the walla Harris.
B
I mean, contender.
A
Okay, so we keep her as a contender. Okay, so then we got the first guy, Chris will after tampatoni dies.
B
Any other list?
A
Okay, so unfortunately. And then we have. So it is between over the wall of harris and queefer sutherland.
B
Yeah. Over the wal or quee for southern.
A
Also we have jock strap protecting the fumy jewels between chrissy d's hockey player hips Drexler.
B
Any of the list.
A
So we got quee for sutherland versus over the wall of harris.
B
Yes. Qu.
A
You got to make the call.
B
The wall of harris. Queeford Sutherland. Very funny. It's the rhyme. Over the wall of harris is very creative. This is a tough one. This is a tough one.
A
It's up to you because I can't choose. I'm just the reader.
B
This is it. I'm gonna have to go with qu for southern.
A
Qu for southern. You are the winner. You are the ppw. You'll see your name up at history I is is back dot com. Thank you, folks. We love you. Stay out of John d. Rockefeller's way and listen to the real wild he did right now on patreon.
Podcast Summary: "John D. Rockefeller Good or Evil?"
History Hyenas with Chris DiStefano and Yannis Pappas dives deep into the life and legacy of one of history's most controversial figures, John D. Rockefeller. Hosted by comedians Yannis Pappas and Chris DiStefano, this episode blends historical insights with their trademark humor to explore whether Rockefeller was a benevolent philanthropist or a ruthless monopolist.
The hosts kick off the episode by highlighting Rockefeller's immense wealth and his status as possibly the richest man in modern history when adjusted for inflation. They set the stage for a nuanced discussion, acknowledging the complexity of his character and actions.
Notable Quote:
B: "John D. Rockefeller... the wealthiest man in modern history, if you adjust for inflation."
[04:39]
One of the central themes discussed is Rockefeller's role in shaping the modern public education system. The hosts suggest that his philanthropic efforts in education were strategic, aiming to create a workforce suited to his industrial needs.
Notable Quote:
A: "He created our modern public schools... to give education to people who couldn't afford it. But he specifically limited the curriculum to reading, writing, and arithmetic."
[10:10]
This limitation, they argue, was intentional to prevent the populace from gaining knowledge in areas like investing and business strategy, ensuring a compliant workforce for his factories.
The episode delves into Rockefeller's aggressive business strategies that led to the formation of the Standard Oil monopoly. The hosts describe how Rockefeller systematically bought out competitors, leveraged railroad rebates, and manipulated markets to control 90% of the U.S. oil refining industry.
Notable Quotes:
B: "He controlled the oil refining industry under his control... he was a fucking megalomaniac."
[11:04]
A: "He would systematically buy out competitors or force them to sell through aggressive tactics by acquiring smaller companies."
[61:32]
These tactics not only consolidated his power but also stifled competition, allowing him to manipulate prices and dominate the oil market.
Rockefeller's philanthropic endeavors are examined through a critical lens. While he donated billions to charities, schools, and hospitals, the hosts posit that these acts of generosity were partly motivated by a desire to cleanse his image and mitigate the negative impact of his monopolistic practices.
Notable Quote:
A: "He donated billions, but he also stole people's hearts for transplants to extend his life."
[17:37]
This duality paints Rockefeller as a complex individual whose good deeds may have been intertwined with selfish motives.
The discussion shifts to Rockefeller's personal life, highlighting his multiple heart transplants and the ethical implications of his actions to secure these life-saving procedures. The hosts suggest that his relentless pursuit of wealth and power extended into morally questionable territories.
Notable Quote:
A: "He got multiple transplants to keep living as long as he could, pushing others aside who needed those hearts."
[17:37]
This portrayal underscores the darker aspects of his character, emphasizing his willingness to prioritize his longevity over the wellbeing of others.
Expanding beyond documented history, the hosts entertain various conspiracy theories surrounding Rockefeller. They discuss his alleged influence over the media, education, and even suggest connections with extraterrestrial entities aiming to manipulate global resources.
Notable Quote:
B: "Rockefeller was part of a wealthy group that meets secretly to influence presidents and kings, possibly collaborating with aliens to sell oil."
[50:02]
While these theories lack substantial evidence, they add a fictionalized and humorous twist to the narrative, aligning with the podcast's comedic approach.
In wrapping up, the hosts reflect on Rockefeller's enduring legacy, debating whether his contributions to industry and philanthropy outweigh his monopolistic and ethically dubious actions. They acknowledge that Rockefeller was a multi-dimensional figure, embodying both visionary brilliance and ruthless ambition.
Notable Quote:
B: "He was a little bit of both—good and evil—and that complexity makes him hard to figure out."
[59:20]
This balanced perspective invites listeners to ponder the complexities of historical figures and the multifaceted nature of legacy.
"John D. Rockefeller Good or Evil?" offers a whirlwind tour through the life of one of America's most influential yet polarizing figures. Through a blend of humor, satire, and historical discussion, the episode challenges listeners to reconsider preconceived notions about philanthropy, power, and morality in the context of Rockefeller's legacy.
Final Notable Quote:
A: "We are all bees in the hive, making honey in different ways. Next time you judge someone, remember they're just another bee in the hive."
[48:56]
This concluding thought encapsulates the episode's overarching message about understanding and empathy towards others' roles and actions in society.
Additional Notes: