Podcast Summary: Holmberg's Morning Sickness – "Rock Wars: Song To Say Goodbye To John Gordon"

Episode Date: January 7, 2026
Main Hosts: John Holmberg, Brady Bogen, Bret Vesely, Dick Toledo
Segment: Rock Wars – Song To Say Goodbye To John Gordon

Episode Overview

This episode of "Holmberg’s Morning Sickness" on 98KUPD centers on their popular segment "Rock Wars," with a special theme: the farewell song to John Gordon. The crew also debates and implements new rules for Rock Wars for the year, stirring friendly controversy and a bit of mayhem. Listeners are treated to playful banter, in-depth rule wrangling, and a final musical showdown, all with the team’s signature irreverence.

Key Discussion Points & Insights

Setting the Tone: Rock Wars Rules for 2026 (01:16–03:53)

• Handicap and Voting System Debated:
  The hosts (John, Brady, Bret) engage in a spirited debate about scoring handicaps, making Rock Wars more balanced and competitive.

  • John suggests allowing a three-win handicap per week for the struggling competitor, emphasizing fairness if there’s money involved.
    • Quote (John, 01:28): “I’m offering something kindly… At the end, you’re going to be at Durant celebrating.”
  • Brady prefers a one-to-one win system, resisting the handicap.
  • The potential for mid-year adjustments is floated, particularly if someone falls behind by July; “We handicap the loser!” jokes John.
    • (03:55): “Brady will get like seven or eight per week!”

• Host Banter:
  The exchanges are playful, full of ribbing and mock outrage. - Quote (John, 02:41): “In order to keep him from losing his mind, we have to give him a little advantage week to week. Because as we’ve established, he’s not very good at this.”

The Challenge Announced: Farewell Song to John Gordon (03:00–03:53)

• Topic Selection:
  Brady officially sets the Rock Wars challenge: select a song to say goodbye to John Gordon.
  • Quote (Brady, 03:02): "The farewell song to John Gordon."
  • The team jokes about the implications, with John wryly noting, "Brady got him fired," in reference to the theme’s harshness.

The Contest: Rock Wars Song Choices (06:42–08:35)

1. Bret's Choice:

• Song: "Get the F Out" by Skid Row
• Reasoning: Picks it as a tongue-in-cheek, brutally direct farewell on behalf of Brady to John Gordon.
  • Quote (Bret, 06:52): “This is Brady’s song to Tom Gore—or John Gordon. He’s not here anymore. So it’s Skid Row, Get the F Out.”
• Fun Moment:
  • John points out John Gordon is over there dancing, ironically wearing a Skid Row shirt.
    • (07:25)

2. John’s Choice:

• Song: "Monkey Business" by Skid Row
• Reasoning: Jokes about John Gordon’s “monkey business” and references not winning despite Gordon “cheating” for him.
  • Quote (John, 07:35): “I saw the shirt. Monkey business. He was up to no good. Thanks for cheating for me all year ... I mean, what kind of partner are you in cheating?”

3. Brady’s Choice:

• Song: "Crying Like a Bitch" by Godsmack

• Reasoning: In on the self-deprecating humor, saying John Gordon was “bent out of shape, crying like a bitch.”

  • Quote (Brady, 08:06): “John Gordon came in there, it’s like he was all bent out of shape, crying like a bitch.”

• Meta Moment:

  • The hosts poke fun at the “obviousness” of the choices, referencing a new rule: “not allowed to be completely realistic, logical or obvious.”
    • (08:39, John)

The Vote: Final Call and Winner Announced (09:33–10:38)

• Listener Vote:
  Due to time constraints, the crew goes with the first caller as the final vote.

  • Tanner is selected at random as the deciding vote.
  • Quote (John to Tanner, 09:34): “You are the first vote of 2026 and the final vote of this week’s choice of a very feisty rock wars."
  • Tanner picks John’s choice: “Monkey Business” by Skid Row as the winning farewell song.

• Victory Laps:

  • John celebrates, pokes at conspiracy theories, and congratulates Tanner:

    • (John, 10:06): “Every time I win, it’s some sort of a subversive co. Like Dave Nash is here trying to solve the mystery.”

  • Prize for the final caller is promised, with John quipping he’s “technically” in charge of the prizes (10:21).

  • Winner Announcement (10:47):
    “There you go. I’m your winner. One and… Oh, no waiting. In my world, it’s 98.”

Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• Good-natured ribbing about Rock Wars competence:
  • John: “He’s not evil. He’s just a bit rude.” (01:17)
• Meta-jokes about rule changes:
  • John: “If you felt that way, I completely understand. You want one to one, that’s fine.” (02:34)
  • Brady: “It's only because you got three!” (02:07)
• Tongue-in-cheek acknowledgment of the show’s chaos:
  • John: “Welcome to The View, everybody.” (01:43)
• On prizes and listener engagement:
  • John: “Final caller will always get a prize. And keep in mind, I’m in charge of that.” (10:21)

Key Timestamps

• 01:16 – Introduction of new rules discussion
• 02:41 – John defends the concept of handicaps
• 03:03 – Theme announcement: Farewell song to John Gordon
• 03:55 – Mid-year handicap/adjustment plans
• 06:43 – Rock Wars kickoff; first song pick
• 07:35 – John’s “Monkey Business” justification
• 08:06 – Brady’s “Crying Like a Bitch” explanation
• 09:34 – First caller, Tanner, votes and decides winner
• 10:21 – Prize mentioned for the winning caller
• 10:47 – Winner revealed, episode wraps content

Summary Takeaway

This lively episode captures the essence of “Holmberg’s Morning Sickness”: a fun, slightly chaotic musical showdown with friends ribbing each other, re-inventing their own rules, and keeping listeners engaged through humor and direct participation. The farewell-to-John-Gordon theme allows for both inside jokes and a fitting musical sendoff, with memorable banter and the return of Rock Wars in full argumentative glory.