01-12-26 - CONDENSED SHORT SHOW - MONDAY - Holmbergs Morning Sickness 98 KUPD

Summary

Podcast Summary: Holmberg's Morning Sickness – Condensed Short Show – 01-12-26

Podcast: Holmberg’s Morning Sickness (98KUPD, Arizona)
Date: January 12, 2026
Hosts: John Holmberg, Brady Bogen, Brett Vesely, Eddie (Dick Toledo)
Episode Type: Condensed short show

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Overview

This episode delivers a rapid-fire, freewheeling blend of tech fascination, dark humor, pop culture musings, and classic Morning Sickness banter. The crew pivots quickly from new CES gadgets to macabre cemetery stories, generational technology, the meaninglessness of long-winded quests (like searching for Nessie), the absurdity of “grandma showers,” and the mishaps of neighbors with anger issues. Notable for its irreverence, sarcasm, and Arizona-centric vibes, this “condensed” show is a prime example of the show’s provocative, anything-goes style.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Technology & CES Recap

(00:46 – 08:44)

• Wallpaper TV and Ultra-Thin Screens

  • Brady leads excitement over wallpaper televisions unveiled at CES, “9.9 millimeters thick...Clean, clear as, like, just perfect” (00:46).
  • Reminiscing about how TVs and home electronics used to dominate living rooms and furniture choices.
  • Anecdote: Brady recalls his ex-brother-in-law’s work making wearable screens—“making shirts that had screens on, but they weren’t like heavy screens. It was made out of, like, shirt material” (01:54).
  • Commentary on how quickly tech makes old furniture and storage obsolete: “Think of the furniture we don’t need anymore because of technology. Every room in our house when I was a kid had an entertainment center” (05:08).
  • Joking about old, heavy TVs, and how nobody has walls of books or shelves anymore.

• Smart LEGO Bricks

  • New “smart bricks” from LEGO at CES; bricks light up or alert kids if they're building correctly.
  • Brady reflects, “You kids, they don’t have to think...what I’d rather have, like, a perfect thing that I didn’t really do, or like the crap I built, which was horribly ugly and stupid, but I did it myself” (07:01).

• AI and Robotic Housekeeping

  • New AI companion “dogs,” wall-climbing vacuums, self-changing mops featured.
  • Brett: “Women are really being replaced.”
    Brady (jokingly): “If we can get the sex dolls, you know, I don’t even know why we’d include menstruation, but they are changing their own pads for the realism...” (08:16).

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2. Macabre Body Parts Thief in Pennsylvania

(08:51 – 15:20)

• News Story Discussion

  • A man in Pennsylvania stole “hundreds” of skulls and body parts from a cemetery—100 skulls accumulated since November.
  • Brady: “He’s an ambitious man. 100 skulls...in two and a half months” (09:32).
  • Jokes about the lack of security and how easy it seems to be to dig up graves. “How many break-ins does it take for you to put up a Ring?” (10:33).
  • Darkly comic speculation: “Somebody’s got Waylon Jennings in their house. He’s buried in Mesa. My ass. Somebody took him a long time ago. Nobody’s ever going to report that Waylon Jennings got stolen.” (12:18).

• Morbid Humor & Reflections

  • Musings about how common it might be for people to own illicit human remains (“20 or 30” in Phoenix?).
  • Stories of construction workers finding bones and “treasure chests” while building the Superdome in New Orleans—just pocketing and not reporting them to keep construction going (17:54).

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3. Loch Ness Monster: 52 Years Wasted?

(19:02 – 31:18)

• Dedication to a Lost Cause

  • The crew discusses a 76-year-old man who spent 52 years trying to find the Loch Ness monster and finally admitted defeat.
  • Brady: “I’ve spent no money at all [and] had that same conclusion...when I was about five” (19:29).
  • Pity mixed with mockery: “Could you imagine dedicating your life to something to find out it was never there?” (20:27).
  • The futility of Nessie quests compared to real unsolved mysteries: “They found the Titanic in the Atlantic Ocean and they can’t find a thing in the lock?” (28:46).

• Scottish National Quirkiness

  • The unicorn is the national animal of Scotland: “National animal for Scotland is the unicorn...No, they’re delusional” (25:37).
  • Laughing at Scottish myths and the persistence of Nessie beliefs.

• Tourism & Ownership

  • Loch Ness has become a tourist trap allegedly bought out by foreign investors, leading to a change in how the experience is sold; ethnic slurs used in a story retelling (which the crew handles with joking discomfort and frequent interruptions).

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4. 'Grandma Showers' and Aging Out of Romance

(31:26 – 40:50)

• Grandma Showers: New Baby Shower Trend? Or…?

  • "Grandma showers" originally referenced as upcoming parties for new grandparents, but quickly devolves into raunchy wordplay and imagery.
  • Brett: “Wait till later”—hinting at a video, leading to a riff about elderly sexual behavior (32:07).
  • Brady’s take: “Grandma showers. The worst phrase I’ve ever heard in my life” (32:07).

• Taboo and Elderly Attraction

  • Holmberg adamantly states that elderly women aren’t a romantic target:
    • “No dude’s ever left his wife for an elderly woman. It’s never happened.” (35:13)
    • “You never go older like that...maybe two, three years max. And that has to be a unicorn” (39:57).
  • Jane Seymour as the “exception” because she’s “kept it together.”

• Physical Comedy and Imagery

  • Long riff on the alleged unattractiveness of elderly naked bodies, comparing their figures to “a melted candle” (38:15).

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5. 'Dear Brady': Hit-And-Run Neighbor Dilemma

(40:51 – 44:34)

• Listener Letter
  • ‘Rodney’ writes in admitting to hitting his neighbor’s car—a neighbor who is “certifiably insane, huge like the Liver King.”
  • Crew debate whether Rodney should confess or cover it up.
  • Eddie: “Have backup.” Brett: “You owned it [on air]!” (42:07).
  • Strategies include blaming another car, collaborating with the angry neighbor, or just selling the house to escape possible vengeance.

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6. Governor Katie Hobbs Parody Call

(45:33 – 49:06)

• Show Tradition: Governor Hobbs Call-In
  • “Katie Hobbs” (parodied) enters the chat, poking fun at recent show topics and the hosts.
  • Political jokes are laced with double entendres, sexual innuendo, and playful insults about the show team’s romantic worthiness.
  • Katie: “I'm going to make it illegal for everybody to have sex with grandmas with the letters M and Y and T in their name. Don't do it, Brad.” (46:22)

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Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

Technology & Nostalgia

• Brady (on wallpaper TV): “9.9 millimeters thick it is. And it just. Right on your. Right on your wall. It’s unbelievable. Clean, clear as, like, just perfect.” (00:46)
• Brady (on changing furniture): “Think of the furniture we don’t need anymore because of technology.” (05:08)

Body Parts Thief

• Brady (on the thief’s ambition): “He’s an ambitious man. 100 skulls…since November. It’s January 12th. That’s 45 days of him going, you know what, I’m going to start stealing heads.” (09:32)

Loch Ness

• Brady: “Could you imagine dedicating your life to something to find out it was never there?…I’ve spent no money at all. Had that same conclusion, exact same conclusion, when I was about 5.” (19:29)
• Brady (on Scottish national animal): “National animal for Scotland is the unicorn. Yeah, yeah. Oh, no, they’re delusional. Mess up there.” (25:37)

Grandma Showers

• Brady: “Grandma showers. The worst phrase I’ve ever heard in my life.” (32:07)
• Brady (on old people attractiveness): “No dude’s ever left his wife for an elderly woman. It’s never happened. And again, the money thing is the only time.” (35:13)

Listener Dilemma

• Brett: “Well, moron, you just told everybody in the Valley you did it.” (41:51)

Governor Hobbs Parody

• Katie (parody): “Don't do it, Brad. You gotta find a way around it. I can't do…anything.” (46:27)

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Timestamps for Important Segments

• Tech/Wallpaper TV & CES: 00:46 – 08:44
• Body Parts Thief Story: 08:51 – 15:20
• Loch Ness Monster Segment: 19:02 – 31:18
• Grandma Showers/Elderly Relationship Discourse: 31:26 – 40:50
• Listener Dilemma (“Dear Brady” – hit & run neighbor): 40:51 – 44:34
• Governor Katie Hobbs Parody Call: 45:33 – 49:06

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Tone & Style

The episode bounces between irreverent, sarcastic, and darkly comic. The hosts veer into taboo subjects deliberately, constantly poking fun at themselves and each other while skewering cultural trends, generational divides, and modern paranoia. The casual, quick wit and Arizona-specific references keep the energy high and the laughs coming, all within the safe confines of trash-talking morning radio.

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For fans of rapid irreverence, pop culture detours, and uncensored humor, this episode of Holmberg’s Morning Sickness is a condensed showcase of the signature comedic chaos that makes the show a local Arizona favorite.

Transcript

[Brett Vesely]

You're listening to the HMS Podcast, brought to you by MMP Guns.com, your most trusted online marketplace for firearms, ammunition, and accessories. Hey, it's Brett Vesely, and I'm here with Byron from MMP Guns. Look, Byron, I have a friend wanting to sell some guns he inherited. What's the best way for him to do that?

[Byron]

Brett, the last thing you want to do is sell the gun to someone who can't legally own one. Tell him not to put himself at risk and come into M and P Guns where he'll get a fair offer and he can rest easy knowing it's not getting into the wrong hands.

[Brett Vesely]

Okay, but what if he lives out of state?

[Byron]

Easy. Legalgunbuyer.com and he can do it online. It really that simple.

[Brett Vesely]

There you have it. MMP Guns or legalgunbuyer.com the safe and legal way to sell your firearms.

[Byron]

Morning.

[Unknown Caller]

S. Morning sickness.

[Brady]

It was pretty great. And you watched on a regular tv? I did, yeah. Just like, you know, normal. And Brett, you watched yours on a regular TV? Yeah. Throw those out. Just throw your TVs away. Chuck them. They're done. Because at CES over the last week, they unveiled the wallpaper television. Did you see it? 9.9millimeters thick it is. And it just. Right on your. Right on your wall. It's unbelievable. Clean, clear as, like, just perfect. Got little outlets on the.

[Eddie]

What's it starting at?

[Brady]

5.5 billion dollars. I don't know what it is, but it's worse. Wallpaper television. So it's just gonna be.

[Eddie]

We were talking about that, like, we kept on saying that it's gonna get thinner and thinner. Well, and then you had. Saw it. I mean, well, it was a couple of Olympics ago. Right where they put it. They had kind of the ribbon screens it was in.

[Brady]

We've had those.

[Eddie]

It. Beijing, where they had the floor.

[Brady]

Yeah, they can do that with floors, but that's projection. And then. Yeah, that's like, they can. I don't know how they do the projection thing without shadows and stuff, but they can do that too.

[Eddie]

But it looked like they had some almost thin material screens.

[Brady]

My. My ex wife, years ago, her brother was an industrial engineer, and his projects were to build housing for electronics. So Sony would be like, here's a new, like, electronic device, which is like a DVD player at the time here. We're building them like this now. And all he did was build the outside to be aesthetically pleasing for sales. So you'd, like. He'd take the guts and then they would Build the outside, the case and everything and all the buttons and all the things. So he's like, this is what we do. This is what the inside. And he would build the outside of it, which is kind of a cool gig. I didn't realize he didn't know that. He knew the electronics, but didn't know how to. Like, he wouldn't build in them, but they just send him over. Here's what TVs are and here's our idea. And then they would make it pretty. So he had a project, this was in 2002, where he was making shirts that had screens on, but they weren't like heavy screens. It was made out of like shirt material. And he had these and you. Instead of like, like, I'm wearing a TJ Watt jersey right now. So I could just turn it on and it would be a T.J. watt.

[Eddie]

Jersey, you know, almost like a separate screen.

[Brady]

Like, it was. The material was a screen. And then I could change it. So it had a little outlet on the bottom. The outlet was kind of like.

[Brett Vesely]

I could change it. Darren Rodgers, if you wanted to, or whatever.

[Brady]

Yep.

[Eddie]

Wow.

[Brady]

And then. And then also it had like a scroll if you want to. Like T shirts. The more adaptable one was a T shirt that like you could throw, like Adidas would just roll across. It would be like. You'd be like. It would be moving. Yeah. Or you can just have it dance. And he said, yeah, this is years from coming out, but we're working on this because right now we can't figure out how to make it. So the charge or the thing you plug. And then computers weren't quite there yet to where you could plug in. And then just like now would be really easy. Put a meme on it or something. Back then it was just, you know, those dancing bananas that were everywhere. That was all you could do. And it was the coolest thing ever. So I kind of forgot about it until I saw the CES thing. Wallpaper. TV is the future. So all this crap we're seeing here on our walls in the studio, these sticking out, what is that 8 inches off the wall? That's going to be cumbersome. The way Those old console TVs were at your grandma's house. Crazy. In my lifetime, we'll have gone from that gigantic five foot by three and a half foot box with a 19 inch screen in it. We had a 27 inch television that the neighbors came over to see. They couldn't believe what was sitting on our shelf. 27 inches. My God, you're gonna go blind. It's too much. And then. And then. I think it was the Burkharts. Don't remember. They had like a 35 inch TV. The Rockefellers.

[Eddie]

First Sony Trinitron I saw.

[Brady]

Yeah.

[Eddie]

Unbelievable.

[Brady]

Oh, do you ever try to lift one?

[Brett Vesely]

Oh, yeah.

[Brady]

I helped Larry move his. He had an old TV in his bedroom. Were you there when we helped him move out of that condo years ago?

[Brett Vesely]

No, I didn't make.

[Brady]

The TV was £145 and it was like picking. It looked normal. It was a flat screen, but the back end was massive. And we picked it up. I'm like, I'm this. We had to go downstairs. I'm like that. I'm not do. This stays.

[Brett Vesely]

This fell with the house.

[Brady]

It's exactly what I told him. I said it for the next guy because this is. You get new.

[Eddie]

Put a steel beam in in order to put it up on your wall.

[Brady]

Oh, you could. Well, these were the ones you didn't hang. You put it on a. On it. That was back when. Jesus. Think of the furniture we don't need anymore because of technology. Every room in our house when I was a kid had an entertainment center.

[Eddie]

Built around the cat. You had to build around that. Especially when it got to the, like, big screen. Sorry, it was just a mini theater.

[Brady]

Well, it was massive, but then you'd build around it. You had DVDs and shelves, CDs on shelves. Think of the wall books nobody has. Nobody has that. You don't go to anybody's house anymore and see a wall of books that has them. And that's the only one. But again, that's for looks. Yeah, I know. He's just, you know. That's another one of my amazing books. I've never read. Who knows? I don't. He's not much. I don't think he reads. I don't anymore. Maybe he's the house.

[Brett Vesely]

We've seen some of those books.

[Brady]

Yeah, he had Mein Kampf in there, but he bought that house, as is. The guy who bought. Sold it to him said, you can have the furniture. And he goes. And at his Christmas party, I realized the old owner of the house had Mein Kampf. He had Hitler's mo. He gave it right to Larry. Larry's the first. Like, look at this, Larry.

[Eddie]

Wait.

[Brady]

Anyway, I gotta get rid of that. No, you don't. This is a talking piece.

[Eddie]

It's autographed.

[Brady]

But think of all the crap that used to be in your house. That CES thing I watched this week in the two. Oh, and your kids are gonna get dumber because now legos has this thing that the. The bricks are smart.

[Eddie]

Smart bricks.

[Brady]

And they help you out and they start like. Yeah. I don't know if they light up or start glowing or something like that when it's like, if you put it in properly. Well, if you're building something, it kind of lights up. The next one to say, that's the right move, or the. This isn't where this goes, it'll. It tells you. Instead of that monstrosity I used to build the multicolored monster that had no. I couldn't even build it. I always got. I got a wall up and then another wall, and then I'd run out of the same and just became this hodgepodge. Everything looked like a Tim Burton movie when I built it in lego.

[Eddie]

What's good, it's not only lights up, it shocks the kids when they put it perfect.

[Brady]

I think that's like operation or what. Yeah, yeah. It's operationally the user take some faults, I love it. But, yeah, you kids, they don't have to think. And I don't know what I'd rather have, like, a perfect thing that I didn't really do, or like the crap I built, which was horribly ugly and stupid, but I did it myself. Like, there's some personal pride in that. But easier is always better. But, yeah, that CES thing had some stuff.

[Eddie]

It's your AI companion dog.

[Brady]

I saw that, too. Yeah. And hypoallergenic pets, because they're not real. The vacuum that goes up walls, too. It goes up a certain height on walls and turns around. I'm like, it's got the ability to make a turn on a wall and vacuum the lower half of your wall. You know what I saw? The replacement of all women. They had a thing, stuff that cleans your kitchen. They had the vacuums. They had a mop vacuum and the mop thing that it'll. It does the vacuuming, then it goes and resets itself. All you have to do is put, like, 60 Swiffer pads in it. Right. Close the door. It goes back to its home after, like, 10 passes, changes its own pad, pops back out and finishes the job.

[Brett Vesely]

Women are really being replaced.

[Brady]

They're being replaced their own pads and everything. If we can get the sex dolls, you know, I don't even why we'd include menstruation, but they are changing their own pads for the realism, I suppose. Unreal. Yeah. I'm watching that thing. I'm like. But and then the 130 inch 1 inch television which has been around for a minute, but it's just perfect. I'm like, oh God. Eventually it's just gonna be your wall.

[Brett Vesely]

Did you call Best Buy already in order one?

[Brady]

I've been inquiring. Wallpaper, TV.

[Unknown Caller]

98.

[Brady]

What?

[Unknown Caller]

98.

[Brady]

No way. Homeberg's morning sickness. Then the other fun notice this weekend I was following is that dude who stole all those body parts out of that Pennsylvania cemetery. See that? Hundreds. He had hundred. 100 skulls and a bunch of mummified body parts that he had. And yeah, they caught him because they're like, somebody said his car was close to the thing and he's like, yep. And they went and pulled him over and he had skulls in the back seat and like femurs and all this stuff. And he's like, yeah, that's it. So he leads him over to the places and I expected this to be like, man, this guy's been at it. He's been at it since November. That's it.

[Eddie]

That's busy.

[Brady]

Hundred skulls. Nobody saw this. 100 skulls since November. It's January 12th. That's 45 days of him going, you know what, I'm going to start stealing heads. And he got to 100 of them before anybody caught him. And then they took him back. They looked back at his house. He had a few of the bodies hung up. A few of them had been reassembled with other stuff. He's playing with them. He is. He's an ambitious man. 100 skulls and like. Yeah, since about body exhibit. Yeah, it's. I thought this would be forever. They said the bones and skulls visible in the back seat of a car near a cemetery in Philadelphia's outskirts led police to a basement filled with body parts it says hoarded by a man accused of stealing 100 sets of human remains, including every one of their heads. So Tuesday the, the, the arrest culminated a months long investigation. Two months into break ins at, at this cemetery. Kept breaking in. They didn't put a camera up. How many break ins does it take for you to put up a ring?

[Eddie]

We're missing the first 10 bodies gone. Let's put something up there or control it.

[Brady]

Have some guy standing out there one night. Higher security, like vip. We do it for concerts. Just keep an eye on it. Just have him sitting up top, put a camera on the thing and just watch the guy pull up out in the parking lot. But he's breaking into this thing.

[Eddie]

Almost had him.

[Brady]

They're out there with us.

[Brett Vesely]

That's Philly. I mean, you know, it's kind of expected.

[Brady]

Well, that's the one thing I said to somebody from some. He was from Philadelphia. And I said, well, you know, in Philadelphia you got your choice. You can bang a Philadelphia woman or you can go get something out of the ground. And it's probably better looking. It's skinnier, that's for sure. I'll tell you that. You wait for it to die, you give it like a year and a half, that thing's going to be a lot thinner. It might, you know, still have a little ass left. So you keep that on.

[Brett Vesely]

It's water weight. That's what it is. It's water weight.

[Brady]

She ate too many hayogis. That's what they should put on your tombstone.

[Eddie]

I wonder if it was going after a particular, you know, year. Like it's got to be, you know, because if you. If he's collecting the skeletons, he's just digging them up.

[Brady]

100. He was just at it. He was just collected. They should put your weight on your tombstone for these guys because they're out there. How many people in this city? We're almost. We're pretty close to the same size as Philly. I, I would guess there's probably 25, 30 people in this city right now that have a human body part they shouldn't have in their house. And not like through grandma's. Like they stole us like ashes. Yeah, yeah, like that. They shouldn't have. Like somebody's got a human bone.

[Brett Vesely]

Think it's that high?

[Brady]

20, 20 or 30. And then one dude stole. Well, because somebody there People stealing all the time, like body parts and stuff. Like there's cemeteries, nobody's paying attention. Somebody's got Waylon Jennings in their house. He's buried in Mesa. My ass. Somebody took him a long time ago. Nobody's ever going to report that Waylon Jennings got stolen. But you can't bury Waylon Jennings and have everyone in this city know it and not have some hillbilly in Apache Junction try to dig that up. There's no.

[Eddie]

There's just a bottle of bourbon inside.

[Brady]

There's nothing there. I. I would venture to guess as many rednecks that live in the vicinity of Waylon Jennings dead corpse, which is right there over there off center by ho. Hokum Stadium. Yeah, he's right there. That there is no way he's still in there. There is no. Somebody took that. And then they go, you want to see something like. Yeah. And then you're in their trailer and you're like, you've got a basement. Sort of. They dug a hole underneath their trailer and there's like Waylon Jennings with a cowboy hat, some candles and a guitar and a skeleton. And you're just like, what's that? Kind of like Norman Bates at the end of Psycho. And in the root cellar there's pictures of him and his album is always playing. And it's kind of like, yeah, I gotta reset that. No way. Whalen Jennings is still there. So I'll say maybe 30 people have stuff they shouldn't have in their house that should be in the grave or a mausoleum or something, I would venture. We're a big city and this dude had a hundred skulls before anybody. Figured it out in two and a half months.

[Brett Vesely]

Anybody famous, as they say.

[Brady]

No, not yet. Yeah, nothing like, who from Philly? Could it be Mike Schmidt still alive? I mean, that. Oh, please. Rocky. If Mike. Rocky Balboa was real. And I know Brett, that's hard to hear. It's like Santa talking about it. If Rocky was real. Best fighters in the world and that story was real, there is no possible way somebody wouldn't steal that body out of ground. No way. They have, like, 24 hour security at Forest Lawn. And in California, I used to go there. It's one of the most beautiful places. They've got art exhibits and all sorts of stuff. But you go by and, like, there's Stan Laurel, there's Walt Disney. Like, they've got all these things in there and you're just walking along. I saw Brittany Murphy right after she died. The grass was still not quite grown in. Yeah, she's right on the edge of the road, too, which wasn't a very good spot, but she's in there. And I'm like, yeah, people would. They're always.

[Eddie]

What about the other stuff? I wonder if they got him with the, you know, the rings and whatever they're buried with. Because a lot of people. That's why people do it. They loot the girl.

[Brady]

This dude seemed. Yeah, but they're. They just steal off the body. They don't take the whole body. This dude was into. Oh, and when we find out what he was doing with him, because we will. You're all gonna throw up because he's boning. He's boning your grandparents so bad. Oh, that's so hilariously bad. But, yeah, what are you gonna do? That's why you should get burned up. There is nothing about that that's appealing. Eventually, somebody's gonna dig you up and.

[Eddie]

Collect you or, yeah, I have to move you.

[Brady]

Yeah, for sure. There were on my grandpa's property in Pennsylvania, you'd wander around and you'd find stuff from, like the 1800s, and you just, you know, drift off. My and my dad knew about, like, this was a cement, like a grave on wherever somebody died, they just put them here, stick them here.

[Eddie]

Family land.

[Brady]

Yeah. And they'd put a thing in there and etch, like into the rock the name and the time.

[Brett Vesely]

Like, whoa.

[Eddie]

How many Waltons were up in the mountains in the 70s?

[Brady]

Oh, there was one that just had this weird name, like Alfred something. And then afterward it just said 1845. And you had to move a bunch of grass. It was just a stone that they'd carved the name and they buried him right there. And I'm like, he's not still in there. There's no way. These rubes in Mount Jewett, Pennsylvania, long ago dug his ass up. Teenagers in the area. I'd have been in on that. I have a hard time going by that cemetery on Lincoln because I've been in there when I used to run that and I get tired and I'd wander into that because I don't want to be. I just see what's there. They have all these Baha' I faith people, and I didn't know what that was, so I wanted, what is it? I have no idea. Okay. Weird religion. Okay. And then in the back of it is just people who died in the 1800s. And I'm like. And they're mounds. If you, like, put them in the ground very deep, it's right off Lincoln. And all I thought was, how far do I have to dig? They're right there. You strike me as the type of person that if you found a skull in the ground or something like that next to like 1845, you'd keep that.

[Eddie]

I went by with our buddy Thomas Wells when we were in Scotland and it was a cemetery and had pirates. Like 1647 had the skull and crossbones.

[Brady]

Yeah, they're in there in the stone. They're not. They're gone. They're long gone.

[Eddie]

People have unmarked, a lot of them. It was just the skull.

[Brady]

People dug that up years ago.

[Brett Vesely]

The Jack Sparrow's still down there for 400 years.

[Brady]

No, there's no way. No way. That's like a hundred different generations of 17 year olds that know where that is. Thomas. Probably fool me. I'll tell you where the pirate graves are. Like, oh, those. Those are just stones. You guys dug those up a long time Ago, I'd be curious about that. If I found a grave from the 1600s, I'd dig. Not for sex, like this guy. Probably just to see if it's still there now. Good. Their skills were. We do it all the time. Some people do it, and it's considered science. They consider that science. I'd just be collecting.

[Eddie]

Wow. Her diet, she ate a lot of.

[Brady]

My dad used to tell all the time his construction. You know, they build big buildings, stadiums and stuff. And the second they would say, oh, we found a bone or an arrowhead or something, they'd have to stop everything. So it was kind of an unwritten rule that if you find anything, just put it in your pocket, keep moving. And in New Orleans, when they built the Superdome, my dad's old boss, Jimmy. Oh, we found all sorts of stuff. Treasure chests, bones, heads, bodies, girls, boys. Like, what? They just dug it. Clunk. Another thing would hit and, like, just keep scooping.

[Eddie]

Got deadline.

[Brady]

Yeah, got deadline. They were late on the Superdome as it was. Let alone, you're not screwing around with the, you know, finding a body down there in that swamp. They'd investigate for months. And then the Superdome can't open. Super Bowl 9 was supposed to be in the Superdome. The Steelers and Vikings. But it had to get played in like. Like an outdoor stadium at LSU or something, or Tulane. I don't even remember where it was because the Superdome wasn't done yet. They were like, no, we found treasure chests, and it stopped. Everything they find, one stops. He found. He said they found hundred of bones.

[Brett Vesely]

What?

[Unknown Caller]

98.

[Brady]

No way. Homeberg's morning sickness. And then the opposite of that is this dude I saw this weekend, after 52 years of his life, he's 70 something. 52 years of his life, he's come to the conclusion and millions, millions of dollars spent that the Loch Ness monster isn't there. He's not.

[Eddie]

He wrapped it up.

[Brady]

He threw the Talon 52 years ago. Dude decided, I'm gonna find her. And he has not stopped for my entire lifetime looking for Loch Ness. And just the other day, came out and said, I don't think. I don't think she's in there. And, you know, took him this long. Yeah, you know what's funny about that? I've spent no money at all. Had that same conclusion, exact same conclusion when I was about 5. He's 76. He's been looking into the monster known as Nessie. In 1973, went out there. In 87, he got a sonar exploration. People Gave him hundreds of thousands of dollars and said, go get him. And because he could loop the lake, he was willing to do it, I guess. But, I mean, you'd think. So he came out finally and said, I'm sorry.

[Eddie]

The lock.

[Brady]

Yeah. Every square inch of this thing. I have been over it 52 years. I've been everywhere and I don't even see anything. He had one thing that the sonar kept showing he couldn't get to. And he's like, that's her. And it turned out when they finally got the technology to get down, it was just a rock. She never moved. He thought he found her bones and stuff. But could you imagine dedicating your life to something to find out it was never there? Like, you dedicated your life to find something. And the conclusion was, I've. I was looking for a thing that doesn't exist.

[Eddie]

He's responsible for a lot of revenue. Tons.

[Brady]

But he's broke. I know every penny.

[Eddie]

You gotta keep going.

[Brady]

Oh, sure. The people that came by and said this, and they see him out there. Shops is. He's out there. Today's the day. I'm gonna find Nesse. And then you watch some dude in scuba gear in, like, 4 degrees, swimming around the middle of summer in Scotland. Everything so murky. He's gonna get him one of these days. The old fella's gonna get him.

[Brett Vesely]

What does Thomas Wells think of that thing?

[Brady]

Loch Ness?

[Eddie]

Yeah, I think we went to the center. Yeah, I think I went to the.

[Brett Vesely]

So is it a tourist trap to him, or is it.

[Eddie]

Well, do they actually bent out of shape because they're selling CDs? Music?

[Brady]

Oh, yeah. It changed, though, Brett. It used to be a Scottish tradition. And then chinkies bought it. That's his exact thing. When he told me, now the chinkies own it. And I'm like, what does that mean? Who are they? Is that a family in Scotland? No, the Chinese. I'm like, calm down. I think you're allowed to say anything. You're saying, aye, they bought it and they ruined it. They ruined it and made it all about pictures. Like, what was it before? Well, you took your own picture. Now you gotta pay chankies. And I'm like, stop saying that.

[Eddie]

There's a big, like, paper mache Loch Ness monster out front. That's. That's so you can take your selfies and stuff.

[Brady]

Right. But some Asian people bought the area. And evidently.

[Eddie]

And even the music. They're playing bagpipes.

[Brady]

Yeah. They hang out there. And it's the whole thing. It's like a bunch of weirdos show up and look. But he was very upset about who owns it now. And now they're taking over all of Scotland. That's brutal. I can't even look for Nessie anymore without some family from China staring down your throat asking you for permits. But this dude's been doing it for 52 years. Swimming around looking for something that doesn't exist. And that would be the most. And he's like, he's got this brave face. At the end of the interview, he starts talking. He's like, hey, it was a great. It was a great exploration. And I'm not giving up hope. She could just be elusive.

[Eddie]

52 years, but I'm done.

[Brady]

I can't swim anymore. My bones. Hey, eck. I've got achy bones.

[Eddie]

He's focused his time on making curling stones.

[Brady]

This guy said, this guy should have hooked up with Toledo. Kind of the same thing. Couldn't find Loch Ness. Toledo. Can't find the dad. It's 50 plus years. He could find him. If you look for. He knows where he is. Oh, I know where Loch Ness is. I know a Nessie should be. And he was the one, like years ago. Remember that? The famous pictures of the. That grainy photography where the thing's kind of popping up. That's his.

[Eddie]

Looks like the neck.

[Brady]

Yeah. He's like, hey, that's the one. This is the one that really threw him. It was a moss covered rock. And for some reason they thought that was Nessie all reaching. The water would come and go and, I don't know, get a boat, go out there and poke it with a stick. If it doesn't move, it's a rock. His last name? Brett. Calm down. No, I can't say it. I'm not gonna say it because my name is Adrian Shine. But you can call me a Shine. I'll be in the water looking for Nessie. That's you. I'm celebrating 50 years of looking for the beast. Dedicated his whole life to it. Can you imagine a more 50 years?

[Eddie]

Thank you so much. Yeah, we're gonna have a shine party.

[Brady]

Yeah, we're gonna have a party for a shine. I'm a naturalist. He's 76. He started it. 52 years. He's 24 years old. Young man, whole life ahead of him. I'm gonna look for and I'll give you this. Our fine Nancy. Everybody go get him shine. And he went out there and hopped in even.

[Eddie]

I mean, he must not have known all the other people that did it like Jacques Cousteau did something over there and all these scientists.

[Brady]

Yeah. But they just showed up for a couple days. This dude was dedicated for. For five decades. And after about, you know, if you're friends with him, I mean, you've gone crazy. And Brett comes back and goes, I'm gonna. I'm gonna look for a Hoffa. All right? And then 10 years later, I'm like, how's it going, Brand? I haven't had a job for 10 years. I just have funding him. I'm gonna find him. Just knock it off.

[Brett Vesely]

Hoffa was a real thing, though. I mean, you know, obviously you'll never find him.

[Brady]

To the Scots, though, that was. Keep in mind, that is a nation whose national animal is the unicorn. That's a real thing.

[Eddie]

Real.

[Brett Vesely]

Really?

[Brady]

Yes.

[Brett Vesely]

No.

[Brady]

Yes.

[Eddie]

Yeah. Stop.

[Brady]

Yeah, they're a little off. National animal for Scotland is the unicorn. Yeah, yeah. Oh, no, they're delusional. Mess up there. It's the heroin. You saw Trainspotting. They're all on it.

[Eddie]

They have amazing.

[Brett Vesely]

Christ, it is.

[Brady]

Yeah. I told you. I thought you were kidding. No, national animal, the real one. Not like the joke one. Like you're goofing around like our fan.

[Eddie]

When Tom Cruise is riding.

[Brady]

Yeah, yeah. Our symbolic animal. No, it's their real. Like, that's us.

[Brett Vesely]

Is that little Glasgow over there on the Roosevelt district or what?

[Brady]

Unicorns.

[Brett Vesely]

Yeah.

[Brady]

When they're walking around, they're just celebrating Scotland. Anytime you see a gay with a unicorn on, like the Highlands, I never knew that. Yeah, yeah.

[Eddie]

That's a real Scottish warrior.

[Brady]

Don't you laugh at our country's national animal. That beast will haunt you. I'm gonna find it now. I'm gonna dedicate the next 52 years of finding the elusive unicorn. It's just. Yeah. And 52 years, you'd think, like, you'd think to yourself, oh, it's probably dead, right? And if there's one, there's probably others.

[Brett Vesely]

Should there be a little family of them?

[Eddie]

It'd be a sighting.

[Brady]

He doesn't have any good friends.

[Brett Vesely]

I mean, the shines couldn't find him.

[Brady]

No, none of them. And it's not going to pass down to little, little ones. He's not gonna do it.

[Eddie]

83 shines look for that.

[Brady]

That's right. The family passed it and I passed it down to this little one here. He's gonna dive about and look for Nessie until we find him. Would some manufacturer, would CES some manufacturing company just give this old man his due and put like a hippopotamus that's on drugs and stuff a mask on its head and let Adrian find Ness, and then he can die. Because I feel. I felt terrible watching this guy try to smile. It was worth it. I'm like, no, it wasn't. You have to say that you wasted 52 years on something we all knew wasn't real. And think of how often you have a million dollars at your disposal. You were so incredibly industrious. You got people to give you hundreds of thousands of dollars, and you wasted. Did it. Leave it.

[Brett Vesely]

Unicorns. I mean, come on.

[Brady]

Come on. I. I feel bad enough for the people that gave him money, but he had it in hand. This won't go to waste. Thank you. And then he'd go diving. Nothing today, but tomorrow the sun shall rise. He'll be back down there.

[Eddie]

I'm surprised he didn't get in on the boat thing, because you can go out on a boat looking for Nessie, you know, the tours, like, sure, they.

[Brady]

Probably found him more often than Nessie. And if you look over the left side, there's old Shine, there's old Adrian Shine swimming about looking for Nessie. I found him today, Adrian. No, I'm still looking. How many years now? 48. I don't think you're gonna do it. You'll see. I'm going back down. It's pathetic.

[Brett Vesely]

They found the Titanic in the Atlantic Ocean and they can't find a thing in the lock.

[Brady]

Yes. I mean, that thing's like 10 miles down.

[Brett Vesely]

Yeah.

[Brady]

You can't find it in a. It's a big lake, but come on. Poor bastard. And he's got a. He's just gotta be happy about it. But, you know, every night he lays down and cries himself to sleep to, like the sound of lapping waves. Empty. Empty lakes.

[Brett Vesely]

It's only 23 miles.

[Brady]

The whole lake.

[Brett Vesely]

Loch Ness. Yeah.

[Brady]

52 years it took her. Well, you know what? I was on the east side of the lake. She could have moved. I gotta start all over. Every square inch of that thing. I'm finding that.

[Brett Vesely]

I think Thriller could walk to Albuquerque in less time.

[Brady]

I mean, Jesus, Taylor could walk to Loch Ness from here in 52 years and still go that. There's nothing in there. We have to stop.

[Eddie]

A bunch of boats, chum the water.

[Brady]

Yeah. You don't have any friends.

[Eddie]

Jaws, when they had the fishing derby. Yeah.

[Brady]

Yes. There's the. That's the, like, the way we do it with people who are like, just fly your freak flag. You have to be a friend and tell people look, that's enough. There isn't a Bigfoot. You're not gonna find anything. There isn't a Loch Ness monster. It's not a thing. The Bermuda Triangle is phony. There's no Bat Boy. There's no Chupacabra. Stop looking for these things. Get some friends and just. I mean, 52 years, nobody said you've gotta stop. And then put. Institutionalize them after 10 years. And he's like, no, I'm going back down. Like, no, you're not. Like, Brett said, It's 23 miles. You should have covered this twice at least. And come back with all the technology. So we're not going to waste any more time or money. We all know it's fake. We've got to put you in a long jacket and sit you down and get life started. That's my goal in life. Nobody put you here for that. That's it. It's a tourist attraction that Chinese people run. That's it.

[Brett Vesely]

And Jonathan said, well, the Titanic didn't move. Yeah, but they didn't know where. The Atlantic Ocean's a little bit bigger than.

[Brady]

What's that person's name?

[Brett Vesely]

Jonathan.

[Brady]

Jonathan. You need to be institutionalized for even arguing in his favor. Maybe it didn't know he was looking for him. Bass.

[Eddie]

Move.

[Brady]

We can find them. They're smaller. It's a monster. The word monster is involved. Other than porn, there's no such thing as monsters.

[Brett Vesely]

What?

[Unknown Caller]

98.

[Brady]

No way. Holmberg's morning sickness.

[Eddie]

Here's another new trend, John. Grandma showers.

[Brady]

What does that mean?

[Eddie]

Basically, instead of the.

[Brett Vesely]

Just wait till today.

[Brady]

Yeah.

[Eddie]

The parents that are getting ready to have a baby. A baby shower. Oh, now they throw it for the grandparents.

[Brady]

Okay.

[Eddie]

For the grandma. Because more and more grandparents are actually ending up raising a lot of children, and that's why.

[Brett Vesely]

A bunch of scumbags.

[Brady]

That's just another reason.

[Eddie]

And that's another gift grab.

[Brady]

Yeah, it's another reason to sell cards and crap. Grandma showers. The worst phrase I've ever heard in my life.

[Brett Vesely]

Wait till later.

[Brady]

Why you got grandma showers.

[Brett Vesely]

Oh, yeah, you'll see.

[Brady]

What are you talking. Oh. Oh, no. Brett's teasing one of his videos.

[Brett Vesely]

Yep.

[Brady]

Wasn't Grandma. Isn't Grandma showers, like, the world's first porn star? That's, like, when she, like, can't control, like, her box just shoots out like a broken sprinkler. Like you. Like a weed eater hit the top of a sprinkler head.

[Eddie]

A woman in India has filed a complaint against her husband.

[Brady]

Like, putting your thumb Over a hose, Brett. Grandma showers. I'm. I'm not listening to you ever again because of that phrase.

[Eddie]

I knew you'd like it.

[Brady]

Oh, and you know there's a chance, a good one, that one of our sets of grandparents in this room was into it.

[Eddie]

I know mine weren't.

[Brady]

You don't know that. You do not know that.

[Brett Vesely]

I would like to say mine weren't, but I don't know.

[Brady]

You don't know. I don't know. But you don't know that either.

[Eddie]

I talk to.

[Brady]

You never talked to Pepple Chicken Babu about whether or not he put his thumb over the hose and then took a shot. You never. You can't imagine it because it's your grandparents, but they did stuff. They got dirty. Dirtier than we've ever been. Your grandparents were dirtier than we have ever been because they had little hygiene and never shaved a thing. That dude was down in there like he was doing through.

[Brett Vesely]

You think my videos are disgusting? This conversation.

[Brady]

Think about Brady's grandkids. I don't want to think about all that hair. They didn't even have toilet paper till the 30s. God knows what they were doing back there. Showering once a week. Oh, had to smell like a poodle getting a perm down there. And that dude put his face in it.

[Eddie]

That's why I think that that wasn't going on.

[Brady]

It was going on. They had to.

[Brett Vesely]

Ben Franklin wore those spectacles. He had those safety glasses.

[Brady]

That's right. Those were like welding goggles.

[Eddie]

He knew.

[Brady]

He knew. Put your thumb over the hose, shooting that ammonia at you. That's why your grandma's house always smelled weird. Like mothballs. Yeah, like what the heck going. How come everybody's house smells different if they're over 60? Doesn't happen anymore. You go to 60 year old's house now. It's nice. Back in the 80s old people live here because that ammonia was shooting all over the place.

[Unknown Caller]

98.

[Brett Vesely]

What?

[Unknown Caller]

98.

[Brady]

No way. Homeberg's morning sickness battle rages on. Me, on my computer, my emails. Rather this, rather that. Let's just end it right now. Pretty much whatever you put up against grannies. I'm gonna say the other thing. Grannies are absolutely off limits. Like those.

[Eddie]

Good to respect the granny.

[Brady]

Not as respect. They're disgusting. They shouldn't be on the planet. They should be grandmothers. And that is all. At a certain age, their clothes should just fuse onto their bodies and never come off again.

[Eddie]

Ugh.

[Brady]

And I'm right about this because no dude's ever left his wife for an elderly woman. It's never happened. And again, the money thing is the only time nobody's ever gone. I'm leaving my wife. Oh my God, that's Terry. That's terrible. Yeah, I met a really old lady and I fell in love. Doesn't. It's not a thing. How old is she? Like 78. No, no, no, no. That's not a thing. You're just a. You're just so young. I know, I know, but I. I can't be with this young in shape woman anymore. I need an elderly grandmother who's had two mesh surgeries. Not a thing, Brady. Some dudes have left their lives. Yeah, some dudes have actually, and this is not an argument for it, but some dudes have actually left their wives to go gay. But no man's ever left his wife, no matter how bad it is, because he met a hot elderly woman.

[Brett Vesely]

It's not happened unless she's got money.

[Brady]

No, you said, well, that's the only way. And then you're not marrying her for that. And even then, like, I like money. I'm not so sure. I think I could do gay old twink before I could do Granny's. Those types, the big, you know, the ones y' all picture, like a bray, like, Brett, how funny would it be pretty. I'm gonna leave running like, oh my God, you're right. Yeah, it's just over. I met an elderly woman. You couldn't keep it. Oh, that's. You wouldn't be happy for him. You'd be like, what are you doing?

[Eddie]

Her name's Granny Racklin.

[Brady]

And then you. And then you met her and she's like £195 and just slopping all over those big old tricep arms, wailing about that strange floral pattern shirt that only grandmothers have that almost looks like it's doubling as some sort of a apron at a bad barber shop. But it's also a shirt. I'm leaving for that. Like, what in the world? But if Brady said I'm leaving cuz I'm gay, we'd laugh.

[Eddie]

We.

[Brady]

Like that makes sense. It makes sense. I get it, I get it, I get it. Like between the two, if you said I'm leaving for this elderly woman, like, oh my God, I'm just kidding. I'm gay. Like, oh, thank God.

[Brett Vesely]

Grandma or grandpa.

[Brady]

Well, neither. No, now we're getting into weird. Just banging old people.

[Eddie]

That's a good. You know, it's Granny or the.

[Brady]

The equal of a Man, the Lemon Party. Yeah, Lemon Party looks pretty fun. I think we'd have it all the same kind of ideas. I think our minds are the same. I think Granny's all over the map. I'm talking about the Granny's that when they lay down, they look like people who just jumped out of a five story building. It's like the after you're laying on the road all splayed out, you're like, oh my God, she splattered all over. I'm alive. Like, that's how your body looks. Laying down.

[Eddie]

Looks like a melted candle.

[Brady]

Like, oh my God, somebody deboned three people and glued them together. There's just skin in there. Yuck. Oh, Brett, you ruined my day. Blame Bailey.

[Brett Vesely]

He's the one who sent it over.

[Brady]

This guy says you've got deep hate for naked grannies because you saw yours naked. I remember. Yeah, I did. And that was. That might be true, Isabelle.

[Eddie]

It's a core memory.

[Brady]

Oh, it is a core memory.

[Brett Vesely]

Brad wants to know what about a Jane Seymour type granny?

[Brady]

Well, no, no, that's not what we're talking about. You know, like these grannies that you showed me. Jane Seymour is an attractive woman who kept it together. It's not just for having grandchildren. Although, still foolish to chase that down. But yeah, Jane Seymour looks fantastic. That's different. You can't tell she kept it together. I'm talking about run of the mill mesa grandmother. Oh, no. Yeah. And again. Find me one dude that said, I'm leaving my wife for an elderly woman. 1. But I could find you hundreds of them that left their wives for dude. Because it's a more viable and reasonable way to go.

[Brett Vesely]

What the hell is this world coming to? Junior.

[Brady]

Would you ever even, like, if you were single, date a sight unseen? You guys. Like, she's 78. Like, come on. You wouldn't even give her a chance. No, you wouldn't.

[Eddie]

No. Oh, no. I'm like, even when you're 78, it's off limits.

[Brady]

Yes, even when you're 78, you're not looking age appropriate. You're like, how do I get out of this? You're hoping you have some money, then you can at least pull 50 something.

[Brett Vesely]

Hey, I'm in my 50s. I went younger. I mean, so did you.

[Brady]

Everybody. You never go older like that. Maybe two, three years max. And that has to be a unicorn. Then it kind of ages along with you. But man, oh, man, you do not go. Yeah, I'm leaving. She's 20 years older than me. You're like you're 53. I know you got to see this thing. The ass I'm pulling. You'd be so grossed out with your friend talking about it. Oh, all we do is quit talking about.

[Eddie]

We've got one friend who.

[Brady]

Oh, we've got a friend who married an older lady, but that was back when they were young. They got. They started young. He was young, she was a little older. But if it's in your 30s and, like, you're in your late 20s and she's, like, 38, that's different. No man has ever married an elderly woman after.

[Unknown Caller]

What, 98.

[Brady]

No way. Homeberg's morning sickness. Dear Brady, I accidentally hit my neighbor's car backing out of the driveway the other day. Nothing really bad happened, but I drove away. I do not want to tell him my neighbor is certifiably insane. He once took a swing at another neighbor because the guy walked on his lawn. He went to his house to do it. He also screamed at a guy for throwing trash in the garbage on trash day, and the guy lost it. I live in fear of him almost every day. Anyway, I did it yesterday afternoon. Saturday. He parks like an idiot, sort of wherever he wants in the cul de sac. So far, he hasn't put it together that I hit him, and I've kept my car in the garage and I'm going to go get it painted immediately. I do have a little guilt, but I can't beat him up. There's no way. And I don't want to deal with him. I'm admitting completely that I'm scared. He's huge. Like, that Liver King guy, too. I need help, Rodney. He ran over the Liver King's car.

[Brett Vesely]

Well, moron, you just told everybody in the Valley you did it.

[Brady]

Shh. You might use the fake word.

[Eddie]

Gets out, Liver King gets. Oh, boy.

[Brady]

He took a swing at a guy for walking in his lawn. He went to find him.

[Eddie]

Now, he said there wasn't much damage, but then he's like, I gotta paint my car.

[Brady]

Not much damage, but still something you'd notice and line up is my guess. Like, he would.

[Eddie]

It be like, you know, grocery cart, ram the door, door, ding.

[Brady]

It sounds to me. Yeah. Like there's, like, he can fix his with a little paint. And I think he's hoping that Liver King can too, or Liver King will never notice.

[Eddie]

But he's scared. I would have backup.

[Brady]

Yeah, the cops.

[Brett Vesely]

Especially now.

[Eddie]

And tell the Liver King what happened. No way.

[Brett Vesely]

Especially now. You owned it.

[Brady]

You said it on the air. But yeah, nobody Knows that it doesn't.

[Brett Vesely]

Matter how many dudes live in a cul de sac that had their car hit. That's a big dude and that knocked somebody else out on their grass.

[Eddie]

This.

[Brett Vesely]

This guy.

[Brady]

Identify an awful lot of details. Rodney. You're gonna get killed by the litter.

[Brett Vesely]

You're done.

[Eddie]

He could be pleasantly surprised.

[Brady]

Or not.

[Eddie]

I appreciate it.

[Brett Vesely]

Or not.

[Brady]

Or not. Or the guy.

[Eddie]

God bless.

[Brady]

Now I'm gonna kill you. Yeah. Stuffs him in the garbage with the other neighbor's trash.

[Eddie]

What's he like? You know, like, if he likes, you know, he drinks whiskey or something.

[Brett Vesely]

No way.

[Brady]

Don't get him drunk.

[Eddie]

I want to apologize.

[Brady]

No way.

[Eddie]

And I want to get your car fixed.

[Brady]

Crazy talk.

[Brett Vesely]

You're done.

[Brady]

I. I go over to his house, and I knock on the door, and I'm like, hey, liver King, what's up? What do you want? Okay, not for nothing, but Larry down the road hit your car. I saw it. Here's what you do.

[Eddie]

Yeah. You. You knock on the door, like, hey, someone just went by your car and smashed it. Yeah.

[Brady]

Yeah. Wait for a car to leave the cul de sac and then run outside and go, hey, I only got Liver.

[Eddie]

King the first three letters.

[Brett Vesely]

Just gotta make sure it's the right color and everything else.

[Brady]

And then you say, trouble. And then you say, let's get them. And then you and liver king run after him. And then you call the police on liver King. Get rid of.

[Eddie]

Drives the same car I do.

[Brady]

Yeah. Guy looks a lot like me. Drives a car very similar. Bumped into your car the other. It's crazy. Let's get him. And then he called the police.

[Eddie]

He got my car, too.

[Brady]

I say you die with the secret. I mean, he gave up a lot. Brett, you're not wrong. But liver king might not be listening. He might be eating venison raw in the backyard right now.

[Eddie]

Not write it out.

[Brady]

Doesn't get back to him. Ride it. Do not tell liver king. And get rid of ring cameras and all that stuff, too.

[Eddie]

Sell your house.

[Brady]

You know what? Call Doug Hopkins right now if you're gonna.

[Eddie]

If you're gonna hang on to it.

[Brett Vesely]

Move.

[Brady]

Call game day men's health and get some testosterone in your chicken body. And then I think, get Doug Hopkins on the horn. We'll get you out of there. And then lifted trucks. We'll get you a new car. We've got you covered with all the endorsements. Holy smokes. That's scary. Living next door to the liver King. Is that what that guy's name is? The Liver King. Wasn't he the one that ate nothing but liver? But it was all steroids. But he's got a. I know he's got a real name. Nobody names their child Liver King, but.

[Eddie]

Well, there's one.

[Brady]

No, there aren't. There's none.

[Unknown Caller]

98.

[Brett Vesely]

What?

[Unknown Caller]

98.

[Brady]

No way. Holmberg's morning sickness. Good job out there, Zach and I just wanted to, uh. Oh, it's been a minute.

[Eddie]

Still. Governor.

[Brady]

Governor Hobbs is here. What?

[Brett Vesely]

I don't know.

[Brady]

You're sorry, but you never. Hey, you guys. What's going on?

[Katie]

Hi, brat.

[Brady]

Hi, Br.

[Katie]

Hi, Katie and others.

[Brady]

Welcome back, Katie.

[Eddie]

Thanks.

[Brady]

Good.

[Katie]

Happy New Year, you guys. Hi, Brad.

[Brady]

Hi.

[Brett Vesely]

How are you?

[Katie]

Remember the talk earlier this morning about bringing grandmas and you were like, yeah, I'd do that. Yeah, we know. Yeah. I'm going to do the State of the Union today, and I'm going to make it illegal for everybody to have sex with grandmas with the letters M and Y and T in their name. Don't do it, Brad.

[Brett Vesely]

Hey, wait a minute.

[Katie]

You gotta find a way around it. I can't do.

[Brady]

Anything.

[Eddie]

Hey, wait, wait, wait.

[Brett Vesely]

What?

[Eddie]

We got you something for the new year.

[Katie]

Oh, it's a poster.

[Brett Vesely]

Yep. Of who?

[Brady]

Of certain member of the show.

[Katie]

It's a poster of breath.

[Eddie]

It's me.

[Brady]

Oh, no, you're not in that one.

[Eddie]

Sorry, dude.

[Katie]

Yeah, no, because it's wet. Cuz now you would have been.

[Brett Vesely]

Wait a minute.

[Katie]

Like it was covered in sand. Whenever I start to get excited, and I should, and I just think of Brady like he's that oil stop. I turn into like an hourglass. Just sand pouring out of my little tight hole.

[Eddie]

Which one?

[Katie]

The one that sand's in the Brady car. My nickname for Brett is Katrina. Katy Floods me. I like that one. Brady. I like that a lot.

[Brett Vesely]

What about Brady's nickname?

[Katie]

Sahara?

[Eddie]

Enjoy the poster.

[Katie]

Yeah, Brady, we were talking about no Gravity Day in August. I don't think you have to worry.

[Eddie]

It's good.

[Katie]

You'll be all right. Don't worry about it. Brett, you have to worry. I have to. I have to tie you down to something.

[Brady]

Oh, wow.

[Eddie]

Put up a poster like that in the governor's mansion of Brett.

[Brady]

Yeah.

[Eddie]

Oh, okay.

[Katie]

The State of the Union is good, but there's still some problems in Arizona.

[Brett Vesely]

What's up?

[Katie]

Well, one is that the elder care is too good and we need to get rid of a few things, so I'm calling for the eradication of all people whose names rhyme with p'. Elia. Oh, my God. I just got this in. The world's gonna end, Brett. You have to have sex with that fat granny. Or me. Who is it, Mathias or me?

[Brett Vesely]

I plead the fifth.

[Katie]

Anyway, you can listen to my State of the state today at 2. My poster of Brett behind me, and there's gonna be. It's probably gonna look like it was in the rain. It's gonna treat it like a dart bowl.

[Brett Vesely]

Wrinkled and stuff.

[Katie]

Oh, it's gonna be all wrinkly and moist. Speaking of wrinkly and moist. The cosmoth. Anyway, go Bears. Yeah, I gotta go.

[Brady]

State of the State looks great.

[Eddie]

Thanks for coming in.

[Katie]

Hey.

[Eddie]

Bye, Katie.

[Brady]

She likes you.

[Brett Vesely]

She doesn't like Brady too much. Who?

[Eddie]

What?

[Brady]

Yeah. That's not a fan. Not a fan? She just passed me a note that said she'd have sex with those grannies before Brady.

[Eddie]

I was just gonna say you're on the list of grannies. I didn't want to tell her my choice when you gave it to Brett.

[Brady]

Oh, yeah. No, It's out of control now.

[Unknown Caller]

88K. You pd.