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John Holmberg
You're listening to the HMS podcast brought to you by mmpguns.com, your most trusted online marketplace for firearms, ammunition and accessories.
Brady
Touchdown deals are happening now at hooters starting at $10.99 per person. You can grab a Hooty's Pick 3 your choice of an appetizer, entree and a drink. Dig into crispy fried pickles, juicy wings or a cheeseburger and wash it all down with an ice cold fountain drink or upgrade to a cocktail or buzz balls for just a few bucks more. Don't forget to pick your player with Big Daddy drafts of Michelob Ultra or Bud light for only $4 or DOS Equis for just five. Do Hooters has the food, drinks and game day vibes. Hooters, where the party always kicks off.
John Holmberg
It's John Holmberg here from the morning sickness and it's time to talk about TVs Doug Hopkins of my home group and doughns.com I tell you about the house down the street from me that has had a for sale sign in the yard for three months now. In fact, it's the fourth different sign. They've got a new Realtor all the time. I do know this, though. They wouldn't be dealing with all this stress if they'd just called TVs Doug Hopkins because he's more than a guy buying your house. He makes an offer for your house, cash. As is, you don't have to do anything. The deal is over. So all you got to do is start the process online@doug hopkins.com or sing Hopkins 1-800-Sale Now.
Michael
This is Michael with Restore My Civil Rights. It's still over 110 degrees outside and the political climate is just as hot if you've lost your right to possess a firearm due to a criminal conviction. We can help at Restore My Civil Rights. We help Arizonans restore all of their rights because constitutional rights shouldn't depend on the next election results. To book a free consultation, call 855- GUN RIGHTS or visit restoremycivilrights.com today. That's restoremycivilrights.com.
John Holmberg
Still streaming Homburg's Morning Sickness online at 98kupd.com it's just about that time for Brady to give us the news. Brady knows we call that the Brady Report. It is brought to you by our friends at All Pro Shade and All Pro Shade Concepts, Arizona's best patio shades. You got the motorized, you got the manual, you got that. Check that off. You get a free in home consultation@allprochade.com. you go there and you check all that out. And they got the. The deal that blocks out 95% of the UV rays, which is a good thing because those are the. The bad rays. But also drops temperature like 20 degrees. Get shady, man. That's where it's supposed to be. And get it in your backyard today. Take a look. Allprochade.com Brady report it.
Doug
Good Wednesday morning to you, Phoenix. Hello world.
John Holmberg
Hi.
Doug
Happy Left Handers day.
John Holmberg
Happy Brady Day.
Doug
It is. Because the other one is National Filet Mignon Day.
John Holmberg
Oh, Jesus Christ, man, you gotta change your mindset. I got Dr. Emailed in and said I would love the name of the doctor that told Brady that his diet and his kidneys are not correlated in any way at all. It's Dr. Bogan. It's Dr. Bogan is who it is. Yeah. No doctor told him that.
Doug
One of the best.
John Holmberg
Yeah. No doctor has ever told you you diet. What are you worried about that for? Your kidneys were bad to start with. Load them up, man.
Doug
Push them.
John Holmberg
Yeah, that's what. Yeah, I'm sure they said see what they've got. Red line.
Doug
It's like a way to get better training to work out.
John Holmberg
Yeah. I think the I saw on Brady's medical report said redline. That mother is what the doctor wrote down. I think your doctor hates you. Eat whatever you want, man. He's the dude. Yeah. Hey man, you just eat whatever you want. I don't know why everybody's up your ass, man. You still got one third of a good kidney.
Doug
Got a couple of basis fun facts. The fear of long words is called bradyitis. Here I go. I'm gonna give it a war.
John Holmberg
All right, let's have it. It's a long word.
Doug
Hippo Potomac equipped a Dallophobia.
Brady
I'll buy it.
John Holmberg
All right. Yeah, I did it on purpose.
Doug
The expression my bad became popular. Do you know why? Because former NBA had to be NBA minute bull.
John Holmberg
Because he couldn't speak English very well.
Doug
Didn't get the grasp of it immediately. And so when he'd say it was my fault, it was my bad.
John Holmberg
Right.
Doug
That's how it caught on.
John Holmberg
And now it's like normal and it's. It. You sound so stupid when you. I still say I thought it was my bad.
Doug
I thought it would almost be older than that.
John Holmberg
But I guess it's broken English. I knew it was the NBA because they're the ones who they abuse my bad. The other one that they do a lot that I think Is hilarious. And the NBA had to start this one too. And I think it was Elliot socks Perry of the Suns that started this. But the phrase most definitely. Oh, most definitely. Most definitely. All the definitely that there is most of that. We used to every interview like had a nice night tonight. Elliot, tell us about that. Where you see in the floor really clear, you got 12 assists. Most definitely. Everybody I would see most definitely I would see them. And most definitely I get the ball to them and you know, I come up a half court. Most definitely like all right, now it's just an accident. Now it's like a hiccup. And then it started like everybody just said most definitely. He was 100% indefinitely. Right. Which is the definition of definitely. Like it's defined definite on a pie chart. Not all of that, but a lot of that. So most definitely some in, some unsure itness. Most definitely. Same thing.
Doug
Sliced bread is less than 100 years old. It was sold for the first time 97 years ago in Chillicothe, Missouri.
John Holmberg
All right.
Doug
The eastern half of the U. S. Has been having the muggiest summer since 1981. A lot of muggings that stretches from Mississippi valley to the east coast.
John Holmberg
Most definitely, most definitely. Almost all the definitely.
Doug
22 entire states plus Washington D.C. my bad. Have said at least 44 year highs. Dew point temperatures are a measure of how much moisture there is in the air. Have soared. Like the sauna, like temperatures.
John Holmberg
Sure, whatever.
Doug
So someone said this summer, the last time it's been that way since 1981.
John Holmberg
What's going on?
Doug
Then someone put a little list together that that wasn't around things that weren't around in 1981. Cabbage Patch Kids CD players, runs candy.
John Holmberg
Cabbage patch kids had to be close though, like the idea of cabbage patch because yeah, it was like 81.
Doug
Yeah.
John Holmberg
You're saying anyone somebody had made one. They just hadn't been given to us yet.
Doug
Diet coke.
John Holmberg
Yeah, that came out like 82.
Doug
Rollerblade inline skates, ciabatta bread.
John Holmberg
You're telling me this, this has something to do with sauna, like global temperature?
Doug
The last time this we've had this it topped was 1981.
John Holmberg
And they're not blaming cabbage patch kids and inline skates. Even though I look at inline skates and I think it raised the temperature in the homosexual community enough to make the temperatures different for us too. I saw a guy rollerblading on McDowell the other day. Man, that's still hilarious. But you cannot, you can't look good. He was going down.
Brady
Pat it up.
John Holmberg
I Had knee. The knee. Of course he had knee pads on because he was going to his boyfriend's house. That's what I just assumed. He was going over to the Papago to get blown by a priest and then reciprocate. But, yeah, he was hitting the top of McDowell right here, sailing down the hill. And I'm just like, man, that'll never look good ever. And he had the helmet and a tank top. It had to be 110. Now that I think about it, it was the middle of the day.
Doug
You don't want to hit the pavement, you know.
John Holmberg
You know what? I'd rather hit the pavement and meet a nice new firefighter than ever roller skate in line even. Could you imagine if you saw a guy just roller skating somewhere right now, Like, Brett would lose his mind. Brett would have to pull over. If you saw a man roller skating anywhere for, like, transportation, not at a rink. Oh, not like, you know, not like he's listening to Silk Sonic in the background and, like, having a moment. He's going somewhere. And he chose skates as his best option. Inline skates. Worse. Because he's exercising for all the anal sex he's going to have this weekend.
Doug
A new study at UC Riverside in California found gossiping with your significant other can improve your relationship. Couples that gossip together tend to be happier and have better relationships overall. It took 76 couples, they wore a special device, agreed to have conversations recorded throughout the day, and about 14% of them did. The entire day was taped. Researchers found that we spend an average of 38 minutes a day gossiping, and 29 of those minutes are spent gossiping with our significant other.
John Holmberg
Huh. Scott Haynes brings up things that I think the NBA also is trying to change the whole me I thing. I have noticed that as well. NBA players are always trying to, like, give credit to other teammates, and they don't know how to do the end it with, you know, Rich and I. They say I and Rich, or they say Brett, I and Rich. No, and it's been. I've noticed it a lot in post game NBA interviews. Probably NFL will start. But if they do that too, we'll give them credit for my bad, which is hilarious, most definitely. And having no idea how to use the me I thing. Might as well put them on rollerblades.
Doug
Not sure if you saw this. The New York Republican from Suffolk County, Ed Romaine, was speaking about celebrating America's 250th anniversary next year. He says it's going to be a gang bang. Like you've never seen. We're going to send off the rockets. We're going to send off the rockets. We're going to enjoy our independence. Thank you. And he had to come back.
John Holmberg
He probably meant gang.
Doug
I had no. Well, he's saying I have no idea. What? Gang bang.
John Holmberg
The proper answers. Go. I said what did I say? Gang bang. Oh, my God. I meant gangbusters. I'm an idiot.
Doug
Hey, it's Larry McFeely here with my friend Wayne from AMCO. Let's talk about back to school TLC for your car.
Larry McFeely
Larry, the last thing anyone needs right now is to start the school year with car troubles.
John Holmberg
Yeah, makes sense.
Doug
What should people do?
Larry McFeely
Head to your closest amco. We specialize in back to school auto repairs for the busy school season. Plus we have a back to school discount for students and teachers.
Doug
Yeah, but do you need to make an appointment?
Larry McFeely
Not at all. Just pop into your nearest AMCO or book online.
Doug
Now that's convenient. Google Amco for your nearest location. That's Amco double A MCO transmissions and.
John Holmberg
A whole lot more.
Larry McFeely
And remember, Amko proudly supports Operation Hydration.
Carlos Mencia
All right, HMS Podcast time again. It'll let you know where to go for some great comedy in the Valley this week. East side and Tempe at the Improv. Catch the always hilarious Carlos Mencia.
John Holmberg
Funny.
Carlos Mencia
Marco will be performing his sets downtown at Stand Up Live. And at the Desert Ridge Improv. You've got the one and only Annie Letterman entertaining you all week. For the complete lineups and for tickets, go to standuplive.com desertridgeimprov.com and tempeimprov.com.
John Holmberg
But to act like you're oblivious to it and then say, but I'm still in charge of stuff. Yeah, there was a. They showed a clip of the D.C. police chief yesterday. And the simple question to the D.C. police chief, it was a woman. And she's. Her eyebrows are already like, what's going on? Like, National Guard's helping us out. But. And then the lady said. So the reporter said, what is the chain of command then? And she goes, what's that? And then someone just goes, move. And started to talk.
Brady
Four out of the way.
John Holmberg
How can you still be in charge of something if the words chain of command and you're on top of it and you don't understand it. What's that mean? It was a great answer, though, because she was like, it was so innocent. I don't know what your chain of command. That's the first I'm hearing that phrase.
Doug
Six year old man wound up in the hospital after seeking dietary advice from Chat GPT and accidentally poisoning himself.
John Holmberg
I need to step out of the room.
Doug
According to the reports.
John Holmberg
Here we go.
Doug
Published in the Annals of Internal Medicine, the man wanted to eliminate salt from his diet.
John Holmberg
Is this what's happening right now?
Doug
And he asked Chat GPT for a replacement. The artificial intelligence platform recommended sodium bromide chemical, often used in pesticides as a substitute.
Scott Haynes
Even I can't get behind you on this one, Brady. This is definitely an attempt to try to indoctrinate yourself into your own belief.
Doug
Then the man purchased the sodium bromide online, replaced it with salt for three months, and it killed. Eventually went to the hospital, fearing his neighbor was trying to poison him. There, the doctor discovered he was suffering from bromide toxicity.
John Holmberg
Wait. The doctor said what you eat sometimes can hurt you. What a terrible doctor. That's. Yeah.
Brady
That shook his head.
Doug
Yeah, but the salt wouldn't.
John Holmberg
The salt part of the salt brought up sodium bromides.
Scott Haynes
Brady, you tell him. Anytime you tell a guy try to cut out salt, look what happens to him. Brady, look it. You've got a news story. What happened? The guy said, I got to cut out salt. He's dead. Now. Keep eating the salt bogan. You'll be fine. In fact, when I was taking my last few breaths, halfway under that bed, crawling for the last try to get help, I thought to myself that Jack in the Box show was good.
Doug
Bromide toxicity was more common in the 20th century when bromide salts were used in various over the counter medicines. Cases declined sharply after the FDA phased out bromide between 1975 and 1989.
John Holmberg
Don't use that story as an example of why you can't cut out salt. You're eliminating it. And you're starting tomorrow with Brett at Viet Shack, the worst place for you ever.
Doug
This guy in Florida, Oregon.
John Holmberg
Close.
Doug
Is facing serious charges after his homemade grenade. He lost an arm. There's some guys are carjacking and he tried to detour the carjackers with his homemade grenade. It went off a little early.
John Holmberg
Deter or detour?
Doug
Deterred.
John Holmberg
Yeah. Okay. Deterred.
Doug
Deterred them.
John Holmberg
Yeah, because you detour them with a grenade, they're just gonna make a left or right. You deter them, it stops them.
Doug
Got a United States Postal Service letter carrier. Guilty?
John Holmberg
Most definitely. Most definitely. My bad. Most.
Doug
Marianne Mag. Dammit.
John Holmberg
I like her.
Doug
31 years old. She was stealing credit cards from the. Being delivered to people in the mail.
John Holmberg
Okay.
Doug
And she ended up cashing in pretty darn good. Went on multiple luxurious trips, bought The Tesla Cyber truck. She got in trouble when she was. Posted a picture of her with stacks.
John Holmberg
Yeah, I can't do that. If you're stealing, you can't. You can't stack up. Oh, yeah, she's in her Yankees.
Doug
Check out the stacks.
John Holmberg
All right. That's a big win.
Doug
Yeah.
John Holmberg
Yeah. She's posing with a pile of money that's the size of her hand in our apartment.
Doug
They found 133 credit and debit cards, 16 U.S. treasury checks, 18 stolen gift cards.
John Holmberg
Getting it done.
Doug
She's looking at 30 years.
Brady
Go Yanks.
John Holmberg
Yeah, she's got her Yankees hat on. Most Yankee fans are criminals, though, let's be honest.
Doug
This dude, Kip Polston from Iowa, was pulled over in Nebraska this past Sunday for not working. For not having working lights on the flatbed trailer. He was hauling two motorcycles. One was reported stolen. Another one was registered to someone else. He also has a suspended license. And one more thing. The police approached Kip, who's totally naked with a pair of pants draped over his crotch. When he was asked why he's naked, he stated it was so hot, that he was allergic to his own sweat.
John Holmberg
Oh, no.
Doug
He also admitted that I. I got.
John Holmberg
A pipe in a. Yeah, crystal meth was a dab.
Brady
Yeah, man, you can call out these yeah, well scenarios in a second.
John Holmberg
Scratching your head with no pants on. I assume one thing and one thing only. There is a pipe in you or near you.
Doug
Here's a picture. Kip.
John Holmberg
Yeah. Yeah. I could have looked at this werewolf and thought, yeah, that guy's definitely on the mess. Just a picture alone. It looks like if. If Titus was Teen Wolf. Three to bad luck. Most nude drivers. The cops don't really sit. And they don't even need the police dog. They've got enough suspicion to believe I'm gonna take a look around for your pipe and they're gonna find it.
Doug
Some great food news. KFC is bringing back their potato wedges. After five years, you're not allowed to have one available August 18th.
John Holmberg
I know what you just did. That's before the surgery, so I can do whatever I want.
Doug
Game on.
John Holmberg
No, it is not.
Doug
And the last one is definitely game on. John. Olive Garden. I don't know if you knew this came off. You can buy the soups by the gallon now.
John Holmberg
Well, yeah, cuz that's what you want is a gallon of anything to eat. That's what I'm saying. Game off. Drink a gallon of soup, Brady, he gets your chicken. Don't say that. No, I said you can't he just. I know he took that as a challenge.
Doug
Pasta fagioli toscana.
John Holmberg
You're not allowed to have those either.
Doug
Olivel. It comes out to $2 and 50 cents a bowl.
John Holmberg
Okay, you get. He's just trucking right through. I feel bad for his medical professionals because they're earning their money. They really are. They just stop caring, eat whatever we're.
Doug
Paying them good money.
Brady
Is your goal to become a case study?
John Holmberg
Yeah. To see if you can do this.
Doug
I would like to be a case study if I could.
John Holmberg
I don't know how you actually uttered the phrase to me. Everything's fine.
Brady
And was getting mad about it.
John Holmberg
Yeah. When the good kidney. Still there. Humming along at like 3%. That's 3% more than zero. That's working.
Doug
I've got two quick Brady videos.
John Holmberg
You're not allowed to have Olive Garden soups anymore either. He's right.
Doug
I just ordered a gallon.
John Holmberg
Soups in general are super duper salty.
Doug
Yeah.
John Holmberg
You're done with that too, man. It's lifestyle change. You gotta make stabbing him right in the heart good. It's the only thing that barely works. You're a think of Kirby every time you take a bite of salt. And that's one less day with daddy.
Doug
It's a good way to look at it.
John Holmberg
It is a good way to look at it. You stupid son of a bitch. This is your first day. You've thought I should probably think about her like I got nothing to live for. You have that kid. Like you should want to see your future. How am I helping here?
Doug
She's done pretty good.
John Holmberg
She's not a checkout. Then who cares? My bad.
Doug
She's had a good life.
John Holmberg
Yeah. Vertigo.
Doug
First one is a. A dude with a cobra under his shirt.
John Holmberg
Smart guy. Holberg's morning sickness. It's India, right?
Doug
Yeah.
John Holmberg
That's the only place this. Is he on meth or is he just scared of the cobra?
Doug
Well, he's trying to calm. The whole time he's.
John Holmberg
Oh, he was sleeping. Oh, God. So he. But he was asleep and a cobra crawled up in his shirt?
Doug
I guess so.
John Holmberg
Does it bite him? Does it get him? That's Indian for my bad.
Brady
It's most definitely going to kill.
John Holmberg
Oh, my God. I would be the same as this guy, though. Oh, they got him. Run away.
Doug
Look at that thing.
John Holmberg
That's what happens when you sleep on the floor in India.
Brady
What happens when you sleep in India.
John Holmberg
That's true. Go to India. That's true. You're gonna a cobra in your Shirt is a parting gift.
Brady
And there's the Brady playing with it.
John Holmberg
Yeah, there's Brady with a stick.
Doug
Look, look, look. How.
Scott Haynes
How high is sodium is a cobra?
John Holmberg
Poor little guy.
Doug
This next one's a quick one.
John Holmberg
Okay.
Doug
Removing a lady from the sporting event.
John Holmberg
It's like Shaquille o' Neal is the cop.
Doug
It does.
John Holmberg
They're pulling us, a white lady out of this sporting event.
Brady
Brady in front, possibly.
John Holmberg
Yeah, they're. Officer Brady off through o'. Neill. They pick her up and walking around. Oh, she just smacked. Oh, she smacked the cop. And the cop smacks back. He knocked her out. Awesome.
Doug
I think there's a little sound.
John Holmberg
There's a sound effect in her, but my God, she takes a swing and hits the cop in the back of the head. And he turns and goes, that's enough of that. And he floors her. Oh, my God. Vicious right hook to the lady's face. What country is this? This looks like a soccer match.
Brady
University of Miami.
John Holmberg
Oh, this is all that is. Oh, she deserves. She's. She's from Miami. She's used to being hit by guys. Yeah, she's. She's been in Miami long enough. She's been punched by a Cuban man.
Doug
And bam.
John Holmberg
Oh, he took none of that. He hit him in the back of the head.
Doug
Was it like the computer? Wow, Microsoft sound like computer turning off.
John Holmberg
Yeah. Yeah, that was pretty awesome.
Brady
Powered down.
John Holmberg
Brady said, is it actually, this guy emails. He said, is it okay to get Brady to gargle with some warm salt water if he doesn't swallow it? Because his voice is driving me nuts. Yeah, you're losing your voice. Brady's getting. Getting hoarse. That's what happens right before you go starts shutting her down. Can't have salt. Can't have sugar. Maybe it's lack of salt. It's just the. That's what he's gonna say next.
Scott Haynes
I told you, it's depression. It's gonna set in. The man's gonna just stand there and stare at the Morton salt lady and jerk off at the store. I miss you.
John Holmberg
That's right. Salt is your ex wife. That's it. Salt is now. She stole from you. She treated you poorly. She's no good for you. In the future, quit thinking about it. That's how you have to see that Morton lady. That cute little girl with her umbrella wonder. No, she's a murderer. Brett, what do you got? All right, let's go back to India or somewhere over there. Okay. All right. Notice that. Get that sound going. There's no sound for this As a lady twirling in a very ugly dress. And it does India. Oh, she's belly dancing. I guess that's totally missed. Oh, my God. I did. Did a guy just get killed in the back? The man just behind the curtain. There's a curtain that opens up and then a dude shows up, wanders in and throws an ax into the head of one of the people watching the belly dancing. And then he walks away. Never mind. Behind guy behind. No, no, just ignore. That's the worst ending to the wizard of Oz ever. Jeez. Well, the security of those tents. This guy's leg is fallen off.
Doug
Yeah, try walking.
John Holmberg
It has literally fallen off from. It's a boy. It's just a kid. His leg is just.
Brady
I don't want to look at that.
John Holmberg
And somebody's, like, mopping it up or something. What is that? Like they're whipping it.
Brady
Whipping him.
John Holmberg
Yeah. All right, let's just. How videos are these? I don't know.
Doug
Let's jump into this one.
John Holmberg
Oh, it's another mutilated genital. Oh, good Lord. What is this? He's stapling his penis. Cuts back together his Brady's. Dr. Tong, the turtleneck. Oh, my God. Yeah, they're stapling. They're stapling. Oh, he's got a scalpel. Real close to the balls, too. I don't think these are official medical people. Oh, she's stapling up his foreskin to something.
Doug
Did they cut his bag off?
John Holmberg
His bag's got stitches all the way down the side. Oh, stop doing that. Oh, man. Man, this can't be how it works. Enjoy your next vacation. Salt in this diet? Yeah, that's what happens. Need too much salt. You've only got half a kidney. Good Christ, man. What was the backstory on that? I don't know. Holy cow. All right, now that one's dumb. All right, I got standards. Here's a. I think it's a relatively good looking girl that's going to end up having a penis. Her boobs are too baseball shaped. There's definitely a dick on it. Yeah, there it is. That's it. I'm learning, I'm learning, I'm learning. I'd have been fooled for a minute, but those boobs were way too round. All right. Speaking of Ronaldo, I think we got a video of his lady. Okay. Oh, no. Oh, this is Ronaldo's. She's giving birth to a soccer ball out her butt. This lady is. Oh, went back in. She's trying to push a toy soccer ball. A Child's Oh, God. Oh, she's got a green one coming out now. She's like. Like a clown with handkerchiefs. Here comes the grim. She's pretty, too. That's weird that her dad would have done this kind of number on her. And it comes. The green one's a little tougher to pop out. There we go. Wow. How do you know you can do that? And he sent this. They sent this one over for your night at the Swizz years ago. Oh, no. When those two dudes were fingering each other. Oh, God. It's a girl with her hand in the back of the pants of another girl at, like, a bakery or something.
Doug
Yeah.
John Holmberg
And she is going to town on her bottom from behind. Oh, something just stripped out. Oh, the pants are shooting water out. She's like a hole in her pants. Oh, man. What is this? She's filled up with some sort of pee and liquid. And they're peeing all over the floor there. And she won't stop.
Doug
How do you not notice that?
John Holmberg
You gotta hear that. Yeah, that they don't.
Brady
They don't look on.
Doug
In shame.
Brady
In other.
John Holmberg
How much is in her.
Doug
It's a point.
John Holmberg
She's pretty sure she gets it all. Yeah. She is working that bottom. And the dude behind the counter is not even noticing that. The little Asian girl. Oh, and then she makes her smell her fingers right there at the bakery. Oh, my God. Oh, that's all I got today. That's plenty. Geez Louise. That's ridiculous. This is so bad that she's just spraying bodily fluids all over the bakery floor. It's the smelling of the fingers. Ugh.
Doug
Yuck.
John Holmberg
I've gotten a lot of people who say things about the inline skates. We call them fruit boots up here in Northern California. It is. It's very appropriate. Fruit boots is good. Inline skating. Nobody you've ever met. It's like. That dude is awesome. Hey, man, what's going on? Let's strip on the skates and take a. Let's go over to the circle gate again. No, we're just walk. We're just gonna walk. It take forever. Put your wheels on. No. Hopkins. Yeah, yeah. Doug hops like, hey, John, you want to meet me over at the Moose? Yeah, cool. Let's skate over, like. What did you just say? We're gonna skate there. We're not skating there. Sam's getting to put Sam in my backpack and we're gonna skate over to the Moose. Be like Yoda skywalkers. Yeah. Just riding along on Hopkins. Anyway. There you go. I would. That I would. If Doug Hopkins wants to go inline skating to the Moose, I'll go. That would be hilarious. Because people would be like, isn't that TV's Doug Hopkins? Inline skating? I'll do it. Yeah. Any guys out there right now are like, it's awesome. It's great exercise. You're right. But it's also the gayest thing of all time. They've never invented a gayer thing to do with your feet. 93. 3, the home of inline skating. There's your Brady Report. It's 98, Arizona's most powerful rock radio station. He said fully erect.
Doug
98. Yes, Mr. Gecko, you're a huge inspiration to us all. But who was your muse?
Geico Gecko
Oh, my dear old Nan. She imparted many wise words to me. She would say, never let the fame get to your head. Always remember who you are and let people get more than just savings. With Geico's fast and friendly claim support. I lived up to her advice, and now anyone can file a claim anywhere and anytime. I miss her so much.
John Holmberg
Did she go somewhere?
Geico Gecko
Extended quilting trip.
John Holmberg
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Holmberg's Morning Sickness - Arizona Episode: August 13, 2025 – Heatwave, Chat GPT Poisoning Incident, and Brady's Contradictory Food News
Released on August 13, 2025, "Holmberg's Morning Sickness" on 98 KUPD delivers Arizona's premier morning radio experience. Hosted by John Holmberg alongside Brady Bogen, Bret Vesely, and Dick Toledo, this episode delves into Arizona's record-breaking heatwave, a bizarre incident involving Chat GPT, and surprising food news that contradicts host Brady's own dietary choices.
The episode kicks off with a lively discussion about the unprecedented heatwave sweeping through the eastern United States. Doug Hopkins highlights that this summer marks the hottest period since 1981, with 22 states plus Washington D.C. experiencing dew point temperatures reaching 44-year highs.
Breaking Records:
Doug remarks, “[06:04] The eastern half of the U.S. has been having the muggiest summer since 1981,” emphasizing the intensity and rarity of the current weather conditions.
Nostalgic Reflections:
John Holmberg humorously contrasts today’s scorching temperatures with the early '80s, listing items that weren’t prevalent back then. “They put together a list of things that weren't around in 1981: Cabbage Patch Kids, CD players, Rollerblade inline skates, ciabatta bread,” he notes at [06:31]. This nostalgic enumeration serves to underscore the dramatic changes over the past four decades.
Pop Culture References:
The conversation takes a light-hearted turn as the hosts mock the outdated items, such as brining up the popularity of inline skates, which John ties humorously to the homosexual community’s temperature preferences, stating at [07:09].
Transitioning from weather woes, the hosts delve into a startling and unusual news story: a 60-year-old man in Florida fell victim to poisoning after following dietary advice from Chat GPT.
Incident Overview:
Doug Hopkins presents the story at [12:39], explaining that the man sought to eliminate salt from his diet and turned to Chat GPT for alternatives. The AI inexplicably recommended sodium bromide, a substance commonly used in pesticides, leading the man to replace his salt intake with this toxic chemical.
Consequences and Reactions:
The man, frustrated by his deteriorating health, mistakenly believed his community was poisoning him and sought medical help only after severe symptoms emerged. Doctors diagnosed him with bromide toxicity. John Holmberg sarcastically comments at [13:34], “The doctor said what you eat sometimes can hurt you. What a terrible doctor,” highlighting the absurdity of the situation.
Host Opinions:
Scott Haynes chimed in at [13:10], expressing disbelief and criticizing the flawed advice: “Brady, you tell him. Anytime you tell a guy to try to cut out salt, look what happens to him.”
Expert Insights:
Doug adds context about the rarity of bromide toxicity today, noting its decline after the FDA phased out bromide salts between 1975 and 1989 at [14:11].
In a segment usually dedicated to culinary delights, Brady Bogen delivers surprising food news that seems to go against his personal dietary regime.
KFC's Return of Potato Wedges:
At [17:53], Brady announces, “KFC is bringing back their potato wedges after five years,” set to become available on August 18th. This news is met with mixed reactions as John Holmberg quips, “You just ordered a gallon,” poking fun at the indulgent nature of the announcement.
Olive Garden's Soup by the Gallon:
Continuing his report, Brady shares that Olive Garden now offers soups by the gallon at an affordable price of $2.50 per bowl ([18:10]). John responds humorously, “Drink a gallon of soup, Brady, he gets your chicken. Don't say that. No, I said you can't.”
Hosts' Banter on Dieting:
The hosts engage in humorous dialogue about Brady's food choices conflicting with the idea of dieting. John remarks at [19:31], “Soups in general are super duper salty,” highlighting the irony in promoting high-sodium foods amidst health-conscious discussions.
Beyond the primary topics, the episode features a variety of entertaining discussions and comedic exchanges:
NBA's Linguistic Oddities:
Doug critiques the NBA's colloquial language, specifically the misuse of phrases like “my bad” and “most definitely” at [04:03] and [05:35], adding a humorous take on how sports jargon permeates everyday language.
Police Chief Interview Blunder:
The hosts laugh over an interview with the D.C. police chief who fumbles the term “chain of command,” leading to confusion and amusement ([11:55]).
Homage to Comedy Nights:
Carlos Mencia plugs upcoming comedy events in the Valley, mentioning performances by himself, Marco, and Annie Letterman at various improv venues ([11:08]).
Mishaps and Public Incidents:
Several light-hearted stories are shared, including a man in Nebraska being pulled over naked aside from pants for being too hot ([16:28]), and a Postal Service letter carrier caught stealing credit cards ([15:06]).
Humorous Visuals and Descriptions:
The hosts describe bizarre and graphic video clips, from a man stapling his genitals to a woman giving birth to a soccer ball, injecting humor through vivid and exaggerated storytelling ([24:51] - [27:38]).
Inline Skating Jokes:
A recurring joke mocks the notion of men inline skating, labeling it the "gayest thing of all time" and humorously suggesting that even Doug Hopkins couldn’t take it seriously ([28:16]).
The episode wraps up with a blend of humor and critical commentary, maintaining the show's characteristic balance between entertainment and pertinent discussions. John Holmberg and his co-hosts continually engage in witty exchanges, ensuring listeners are entertained while being informed about the latest news and quirky happenings.
Notable Quotes:
Doug Hopkins [06:04]: “The eastern half of the U.S. has been having the muggiest summer since 1981.”
John Holmberg [12:59]: “Is this what's happening right now?”
Scott Haynes [14:30]: “Brady, look it. You've got a news story. What happened? The guy said, I got to cut out salt. He's dead.”
John Holmberg [19:31]: “You're done with that too, man. It's lifestyle change.”
Brady Bogen [18:10]: “Olive Garden comes out to $2 and 50 cents a bowl.”
This episode of "Holmberg's Morning Sickness" masterfully blends timely news with humor, ensuring listeners are both informed and entertained. From extreme weather events and AI mishaps to conflicting food news, John Holmberg and his team deliver an engaging and laughter-filled morning show experience.