Podcast Summary: Holmberg’s Morning Sickness (98KUPD)

Episode: 12-10-25 – Rock Wars – Song Playing When Suicidal Hiker Called for Help on Camelback Mtn
Date: December 10, 2025
Hosts: John Holmberg, Brady Bogen, Bret Vesely, Dick Toledo

Overview

This episode of Holmberg’s Morning Sickness centers around a particularly unusual Rock Wars challenge inspired by a recent local headline: a hiker stranded—and reportedly suicidal—overnight on Camelback Mountain. The game? Each host must pick the song playing in the head of the 911 dispatcher who, rather than sending immediate help, told the caller rescue would wait until dawn. Packed with the group’s dark humor, candid banter, and infectious irreverence, the episode highlights both wild speculation and creative takes on disaster response.

Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Setting the Scene — Camelback Mountain Incident

• The hosts recap the local news item: a hiker is left stranded overnight on Camelback Mountain. Despite a distress call (the hiker’s wife called 911), dispatchers choose not to send a rescue team until morning due to safety concerns.
• The hosts question the thinking behind such a decision, riffing on the perceived bureaucratic apathy.
  • Holmberg: “All emergencies must be between sunrise and sunset. That’s a new rule.” (06:14)

2. Defining This Week’s Rock Wars Challenge

• After a bit of comedic procrastination and bickering over possible topics, the group lands on a morbidly playful theme:
  • Bret: “How about the song that was playing when the hiker that got stuck on the mountain called dispatch?” (05:08)
• The challenge evolves: What song is in the dispatcher’s headphones, motivating their “meh” response to a very serious call?

3. Recollections & Tangents

• Holmberg recalls a personal story about previously seeing flashing lights on Camelback Mountain and calling it in, marveling at the rescue effort back then compared to the lackluster response this time. (07:40)
  • He humorously classifies “atmosphere girls” involved in his story: "Escorts. Eventually, they become prostitutes. Up until you... once you put your wiener in their hand, they’re just atmosphere girls..." (08:23)

Rock Wars Song Picks & Banter

Brady’s Pick:

• Song: “Jump, Jive an’ Wail” by Brian Setzer Orchestra
  • Brady imagines the dispatcher essentially ignoring the severity, in a peppy, swing-music trance:
  • Brady: “We’ll send a drone up, drop a blanket, some food, a cell phone… If you survive to morning, we’ll come and get you. Until then, listen to Brian Setzer Orchestra—‘Jump, Jive and Wail.’” (08:56)
  • Holmberg’s Reaction: “Why ‘jump’? Oh, the jump… Just go with Van Halen, for God’s sake.” (09:19)

Holmberg’s Pick:

• Song: “Wait” by White Lion
  • He envisions 1980s adult-contemporary in the background of a jaded, middle-aged dispatcher:
  • Holmberg: “The whole song’s about just, ‘whoa, just wait.’ We’re not coming for you tonight. Here’s a blanket.” (10:57)
  • He expands the scenario with character-building: “The 80s lady that’s a little overweight doing dispatch, probably was listening to this. She’s 52, recently divorced. She’s working on her hips…” (11:10)

Bret’s Pick:

• Song: “Die M*****F****r Die” by Dope
  • Bret takes an even darker comedic line, proposing the dispatcher is totally apathetic:
  • Bret: “Jay Cutler’s... doing a little dispatching. Somebody calls him, says, don’t care. So he was listening to Dope’s ‘Die Mother— Die.’” (11:47)
  • Holmberg: “I don’t like a guy who listens to this in dispatch... If you think the dispatch guy was actually rooting for him to pass…” (12:09)

Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• Holmberg, on legal complaints over Rock Wars punishments:
  “We’re supposed to have Brady have sex with that doll at the U-Fest show, and the company’s lawyer somehow got involved. Would have been awesome. Brady, 69 with a sex doll. I would have had to buy it.” (01:45)
• Group Satire on Bureaucracy:
  “We’ll try when the sun comes up. When it’s safe. This is dumb. We don’t do things at night. It’s crazy.” (06:14)
• Holmberg, lampooning dispatchers:
  “She’s 52, recently divorced. She’s working on her hips, but they’re not going anywhere because she sits for a living.” (11:10)
• Shot fired at the city’s PSA humorlessness:
  “We were trying to make a PSA. Meanwhile, the over-the-road signs are jokes all the time. Even when missing people go pop—Pop’s gone Silver Alert!” (10:02-10:22)

Rock Wars Judgement & Outcome ([12:48])

• Judge: John Gordon
• Winner: Holmberg’s pick – “Wait” by White Lion
  • John Gordon: “It’s White Lion, everybody. There’s no question about it.” (12:49)
• The group riffs on obscure 80s band trivia and the state of White Lion’s hands before trailing off in trademark offbeat style.

Timestamps for Key Segments

• 05:00 – Official Rock Wars topic is set
• 06:04 – Breakdown of the Apache decision to wait until morning
• 08:56 – Brady gives his song pick
• 10:26 – Holmberg gives his song pick
• 11:47 – Bret gives his song pick
• 12:49 – Judge John Gordon delivers the winning verdict

Tone & Style

The episode runs on a mix of deadpan delivery, cynical wit, and affectionate ribbing. The hosts are irreverent but smart, taking morbid or absurd premises and mining them for groaner puns and unexpected tangents. Their banter is peppered with local references and recurring in-jokes, making even gallows humor sound like a club you want to join.

Summary:
This episode showcases the unique, often twisted humor of Holmberg’s Morning Sickness. The hosts use a real, troubling news story as the prompt for a Rock Wars battle that’s as much about their personalities as it is about music. Along the way, listeners are treated to personal stories, sharp gags, and a parade of classic rock detritus—ending with a (darkly appropriate) White Lion anthem of waiting it out.