Chelsea Handler: Casino Encounters, Childfree Christmas & How to Handle Broke Boys

Summary

House of Maher: Chelsea Handler - Casino Encounters, Childfree Christmas & How to Handle Broke Boys

Podcast: House of Maher
Host: Wave (with Ilona, Olivia & Adrianna Maher)
Guest: Chelsea Handler
Date: January 6, 2026

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Episode Overview

In this laughter-filled episode, comedian and bestselling author Chelsea Handler joins the Maher sisters for a candid chat sprawling over sisterhood, self-confidence, beauty, relationships, money, family dynamics, and wild adventures. Handler brings her signature unfiltered humor as she discusses her upbringing, Hollywood culture, dating 'broke boys', and why solo Christmases and truth-telling are radical acts of self-care.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Sisterhood, Confidence, & Standing Up for Yourself

• Chelsea opens the episode by sharing her litmus test for self-respect:

  “Whenever I'm standing up for myself...I always think I'm doing this on behalf of all women. Like, I am going to stand up in this moment. I wouldn't accept this treatment for my sister, for my niece, you know what I mean? ... as a sister, you will fight harder for someone else than you will fight for yourself.” (00:00)

• Handler and the Mahers bond over being sisters and how that shapes their outlook, support systems, and perspectives that “all ships rise with the tide” (06:54).
• Discussion on combating internalized sexism and competition – the myth of there being limited room for women’s success (06:10-07:04).

2. The Move to LA, Early Ambition, and Finding Purpose

• Chelsea recounts leaving New Jersey at 19, “for the betterment of New Jersey” (03:44), attempting a cross-country trip with a companion she soon ditches, realizing,

  “I tried to go across country with someone for protection, and then I had to discard that person because I thought, actually, I'm safer by myself.” (04:34)

• On her comedic drive and purpose:

  “My inclination and my desire and my drive was for women to hear me, for me to speak to women.” (05:12)

• Handler reflects on maturity and realizing her core audience—women and gay men—fuel her work (05:12-05:57).

3. Hollywood Beauty Standards, Honesty, and Aging

• Candid discussion about cosmetic procedures, why Handler is open about what she’s done, and her disdain for celebrity secrecy:

  “It's a disservice to other women to pretend that you're not doing something and you look 20 years younger… I'm a truth teller. So I'll always be honest about, you know, anything that is going to help inform other women.” (10:42-11:31)

• Amusing stories about failed fillers (“I once got filler...I went skiing and it fell through my face...”), microdosing drugs, and navigating a landscape of competing standards (17:00).
• Chelsea’s tip: “I always say to my doctor, whenever I'm doing anything, I'm like, I just want to look my age. But youthful, like, well rested and my age.” (13:57)

4. Family, Boundaries, and Childfree Holidays

• Handler on footing the bill for large family vacations, but realizing boundaries are needed:

  “I've extended my generosity for well over 25 years...there are so many other people I would like to go on vacation with...I don't need to be on vacation with my brother's wife...Not on my vacation.” (20:09-21:10)

• Revels in her “best Christmas”—solo, with dogs, mushrooms, and skiing:

  “This is the kind of freedom I wanted as a little kid.” (21:41)

• Wisdom gained: confidence and security come from surviving your own decisions and outgrowing past pressures (21:39-22:55).

5. Tea Time: Casino Men and the Broke Boy Litmus

• Chelsea recounts a wild casino night in Vegas—losing money with friends, borrowing chips from a mystery man in a cowboy hat, and accidentally inviting him to Antarctica:

  “This guy starts texting me...I sent him the link for my Antarctica trip. And then 24 hours later, he's like, ‘I'll see you in Antarctica.’” (25:09-26:38)

• On dating men with less money:

  “There is a difference between not having a lot of money and being broke. Being broke is not hot...As long as you're not lazy, then I can work with that...What I need is...you have to be in addition to my life, not a subtraction.” (28:07-29:05)

• The importance of initiative and self-sufficiency in a partner.

6. Comedy, Storytelling & Creative Process

• Handler distinguishes between joke-tellers and storytellers, placing herself firmly in the latter camp:

  “I'm a storyteller. I like to tell my personal stories. I like to take the funniest, most ridiculous kind of aspects of my life and combine them.” (39:10)

• Opens up about her style: honest, personal, sometimes outrageous.

  “If you are sharing that in an honest...you have to share the good stuff and the bad stuff.” (39:37)

• She describes her process for structuring stand-up: connecting stories with callbacks to create one big “architecture” (67:41-68:05).
• On gratitude and the joy of entertaining:

  “To be an arbiter of joy...that is the definition of being an entertainer. To be able to bring that out, to come on stage and set a tone and bring the vibe up so that when people leave, they leave higher.” (37:38-38:25)

7. Confidence, Resilience & Second Chances

• Handler shares a formative failure—bombing at Montreal’s Comedy Festival, only to land her first development deal days later thanks to another performance (57:31-60:39).

  “Just when you think things have either fallen apart or you can't get back up...look around because there's rainbows everywhere...it's always yes, like anything that scares me. Yes, yes, I'll do it.” (60:35)

8. Female Intuition & Listening to Yourself

• Who does Chelsea turn to for advice? Herself first:

  “I try to exercise this kind of really like sitting with yourself when you have a decision to make and listening to your female intuition because it's there for...Your body knows what's up...” (54:56)

• Encourages sitting quietly, without noise, for clarity and answers (56:41).

9. The Maher Sisters & Family Dynamics

• Conversation shifts to birth order, rebellion, and funny confessions about childhood, from stealing alcohol to realizing just how “sentient” 10-year-olds are.
• Chelsea’s origin as a “precocious” youngest child with unreliable parents—writing herself notes to leave school early, running lemonade and (soon) hard lemonade stands (33:12-54:42).

10. Book Nook: Reading, Writing, and Memoirs

• Chelsea, a seven-time author, shares her latest reads (“Awake” by Jen Hatmaker, Malala’s newest book, “Circe” by Madeline Miller), and the value she finds in memoir and history (61:17-63:47).
• The Mahers reveal their favorites in romance, fantasy, and thrillers.

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Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• On honesty and beauty culture:

  "It's a disservice to other women to pretend that you're not doing something... I'm a truth teller. So I'll always be honest." — Chelsea (11:31)

• On solo holidays:

  “I had the best Christmas I've ever had, really, and I will never ever celebrate it with probably with another person again because I had the best time.” — Chelsea (21:13)

• On dating and ‘broke boys’:

  “Being broke is not hot. Being broke means you don't have your shit together...As long as you're not lazy, then I can work with that.” — Chelsea (28:07)

• On comedy:

  “To be an arbiter of joy...to come on stage and set a tone and bring the vibe up so that when people leave, they leave higher.” — Chelsea (38:25)

• On second chances:

  “You never know when you're gonna get an opportunity for a second chance. So it's always yes.” — Chelsea (60:37)

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Important Timestamps

• Sisterhood & Standing Up for Women: 00:00–07:54
• Chelsea’s LA Origins & Early Ambition: 03:44–05:57
• Beauty, Honesty & Hollywood Pressures: 10:42–17:27
• Family Boundaries, Holidays Alone: 20:09–22:55
• Casino Story & Casino Cowboy: 23:36–29:55
• Views on Dating & Broke Boys: 28:07–29:55
• Comedy Style & Storytelling: 39:10–40:59, 67:41–68:05
• Resilience & Montreal Bombing Story: 57:31–60:39
• On Female Intuition: 54:56–56:41
• Book Nook/Memoirs Section: 61:17–66:41

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Closing Thoughts

Chelsea Handler brings a joyful, honest, and empowering presence to the House of Maher, sprinkling her characteristic wit and wisdom through stories ranging from Vegas casinos to childhood lemonade stands. The Maher sisters’ dynamic backgrounds (sports, viral fame, advocacy) enrich the conversation, creating a lively space for both hard-hitting life advice and unfiltered comedic storytelling. Chelsea's advocacy for women, self-trust, resilience, and “living out loud” is clear throughout—a must-listen for anyone craving laughs, encouragement, or just the courage to say exactly what’s on their mind.

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For more, follow Chelsea Handler’s High and Mighty Tour (chelseahandler.com), her advice podcast “Dear Chelsea,” and the Maher sisters on House of Maher.

Transcript

[Chelsea Handler]

Whenever I'm standing up for myself, even if I'm breaking up with a guy that I'm dating, I always think I'm doing this on behalf of all women. Like, I am going to stand up in this moment. I wouldn't accept this treatment for my sister, for my niece, you know what I mean? For a friend. So I always use that as a barometer with how I will let my allow myself to be treated. Because in many times, and I'm sure you know this, as a sister, you will fight harder for someone else than you will fight for yourself.

[Alona March]

Welcome or welcome back to House of Mar. A Wave original. Kick your shoes off and help yourself to whatever's in the fridge. The WI Fi password is high and mighty, all caps. We have a few house rules, of course.

[Olivia March]

Girls are magic.

[Adrianna March]

Reading is hot.

[Alona March]

And so are you. I am the middle sister, Alona. I am the eldest daughter, Olivia, and.

[Adrianna March]

I'm the youngest, Adrianna. And I know that you're the youngest.

[Olivia March]

Right?

[Chelsea Handler]

I love this. First of all, first of all, let's not get it to me yet. I love being with three sisters because I have three sisters. I have two sisters. I'm one of three girls in my family. We have three boys. You don't have the boys?

[Alona March]

No.

[Chelsea Handler]

Unless you're related to Bill Maher also.

[Olivia March]

No.

[Chelsea Handler]

Are you not?

[Olivia March]

Okay.

[Chelsea Handler]

Few. So I love. I'm always. I do you guys. Have you guys have ever read the book Mitford Sisters?

[Olivia March]

No.

[Chelsea Handler]

It's this family of sisters, and they're very storied. Like they have a big legacy family that there's a million books about them. And I was at one point developing a show about them that never came to fruition. But I am obsessed with sisters. I think sisters are the. I mean, brothers. I could take them or leave them, you know, that's how I feel about most straight men. If I had a couple gay brothers, I would handle that with much more aplomb. But I love sisters. And I love that the three of you are doing a podcast together. I think it's super cute. What a great way to bond and spend time together.

[Olivia March]

It's the best way to. It's like my dream job. I'm naping with my sisters. When you.

[Chelsea Handler]

Yeah. On camera. Exactly, exactly. So you have proof.

[Alona March]

Why not disagree on camera? No. Remember episode 32 when you said that?

[Olivia March]

Roll the tape, flip it. Absolutely.

[Alona March]

Well, let me give a little intro here. Hello. Goodness, you got right into it. Our fourth March sister today has been unapologetically herself since she was 10 years old selling hard lemonade at the neighborhood stand. I'm still a little bit concerned how you did that. When I learned when we were watching this special. She's a legendary comedian selling out venues all over the country. And the trailblazing force behind the late night hit, Chelsea Lately, where she was the only woman hosted late night for seven years straight. She's also a six time number New York Times best selling author. Right? That's amazing.

[Olivia March]

That's right.

[Alona March]

Whether she's doing sold out shows in Vegas, dominating the charts with a Netflix special, or skiing in a bikini on her birthday, she does it all with so much style. Her latest book, I'll have what she's Having, is already a massive hit. Please welcome Chelsea Handler.

[Chelsea Handler]

Oh, my God. Bar sisters, I'm so happy to be with you.

[Alona March]

We're happy you are here. This is amazing.

[Chelsea Handler]

Yes. This is amazing. What is happening.

[Olivia March]

No, literally, it's a lot of energy, it's a lot of voices.

[Chelsea Handler]

It's a lot of you guys are. You guys are some strong. You guys have some strong genes.

[Alona March]

Thank you so much. Do sisters not look like you?

[Chelsea Handler]

They don't look anything like me.

[Olivia March]

Really?

[Chelsea Handler]

No. Every time anybody meets them, as we get older, we start to look a little bit more alike. But I mean, I have access to stuff that they don't have access to. Do you know what I mean? Let's be honest. I live in Los Angeles. They've never had a laser, they've never had a lip flip which somebody accused me of having the other day, which I had to look up a lip flip, which I don't have. But I do have lots of other things going on, let's be honest.

[Olivia March]

Of course, of course.

[Chelsea Handler]

So, yes. So when I see my sisters, I think, just come with me to Los Angeles and we can fix everything.

[Olivia March]

I'll show you the way.

[Chelsea Handler]

They're perfect just the way they are. And they're normal. I'm not. So they're less affected.

[Olivia March]

Are they over on the East Coast?

[Chelsea Handler]

One is in New Jersey and one's in San Francisco.

[Olivia March]

Okay. So, okay.

[Chelsea Handler]

Yes.

[Olivia March]

They split out.

[Chelsea Handler]

Yeah, they're spread out. And then my brothers both live in New Jersey too. I left New Jersey when I was around 19 years old for the betterment of New Jersey, I think, you know, it was time for me to spread my wings and fly. So I drove across country at a very early age and I wanted to start my life in LA because I just thought that's what when my life would begin was Los Angeles. And so I drove across country I had a guy that was driving across country with me. I dropped him off after about five hours of listening to him talk at a hotel. I was like, why don't you get out of the car? And then I pulled away. A few more details to that story, which we'll skip. And there was no sex, nothing like that. And I drove across country by myself, which was kind of a metaphor for my new life. You know, like, I tried to go across the country with someone for protection, and then I had to discard that person because I thought, actually, I'm safer by myself.

[Olivia March]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Chelsea Handler]

And so it was kind of the beginning of my adulthood, even though I was a little kid. Cause at 19, I don't think you're an adult, really. You don't feel like an adult anyway.

[Olivia March]

Were you still stopping in motels and everything solo?

[Chelsea Handler]

I just. No, I didn't stop anywhere except for to sleep and to get gas. That's all I did. Cause I was so scared of being by myself and a young girl in the middle of. I was, like, driving through the Panhandle of Texas. I took that lower 66 route. So, you know, I got here pretty fast.

[Olivia March]

Nice. Nice record time.

[Alona March]

Cause you just knew that's where your life was meant to be.

[Chelsea Handler]

Yes.

[Alona March]

And you've always felt like you wanted to be, like, a star and out there, putting your whole personality, everything out there.

[Chelsea Handler]

Yeah. I really just wanted people to hear what I had to say. Like, I really believed that I had a contribution to make based on my own thoughts, which is really ridiculous at that age, you know, to think that I was like, once people hear me, they're going to understand. And I don't know what I thought they were going to understand. But now, as I've gotten older and so many years have passed, and I realized my inclination and my desire and my drive was for women to hear me, for me to speak to women. Like, my audience is women and obviously gay men. But that's who I'm here for. That's what I believe my purpose is, is to help instill and inject all sorts of women and young girls with confidence.

[Olivia March]

Yeah. And I feel like that pays back. When you work for women and you love them and you have the foster, that community with them for the long run.

[Chelsea Handler]

Yeah.

[Olivia March]

Whereas if you pander to, I think, men, you know, as other kind of celebrities do, or a lot are under fire right now, you're like, that doesn't get you very far. And it takes you.

[Chelsea Handler]

No, it doesn't get you very far. But I think having sisters has a huge part of why that is true for me. Because growing up with sisters, it's like as a woman, your inclination is to be around other women. So when you grow up, and in a time you guys are younger than me, but you still feel it. I'm sure when you grow up and are taught to believe there's not room for many more than you, then that's. Then you're buying into the whole sexist idea that there's not enough room for women, so we better get rid of any other competition that is a woman. That's not true. Like, that's the biggest line of bullshit I think that we've all been fed is like, you know, all ships rise with the tide. So if you're doing well, that's good for other women.

[Olivia March]

Absolutely.

[Chelsea Handler]

You're doing well, that's good for other women. But that's something that I think having a sister or sisters is very important to. That is ingrained. It becomes ingrained in you.

[Alona March]

Absolutely.

[Olivia March]

I mean, with Alona being a professional female athlete, the money is what it. But, well, I manage her. We call me a sister, but alongside her agent, it's like as the bit more money we can get for her, that means the next female rugby player, whatever, to come gets that much more as well. Totally. So it's like lifting all the rising tides and everything.

[Chelsea Handler]

It's like whenever I think about whenever I'm standing up for myself or even if I'm breaking up with a guy that I'm dating, I always think I'm doing this on behalf of all women. Like, I am going to stand up in this moment because this. I wouldn't accept this treatment for my sister, for my niece, you know what I mean? For a friend. So I always use that as a barometer with how I will allow myself to be treated. Because in many times, and I'm sure you know this as a cystatur, you will fight harder for someone else than you will fight for yourself.

[Olivia March]

Yep. But did it take you a while to get there? Like, did you first accept less than you deserved for a while? So you had to learn.

[Chelsea Handler]

Yeah, I was a defender of others way more than I was a defender of myself. And then I realized, like, oh, wait, you know, I kind of come with this package where people think I'm super confident and like a baller and everything. And I just kind of believe that about myself from other people, you know? And then when I sat down and I was like, wait, in this instance, are you standing up for yourself? Are you scared to be the squeaky wheel? Especially in like, you know, comedy in a male dominated industry which is now so much. There's so many more females than when I began and started. But you kind of want to be one of the guys and I'm sure you can relate to that as an athlete. Like you want to be accepted by the guys. You want to be the cool chick that's subscribing to that kind of mentality and sexism as well. Because why do we want to be one of the guys? We're not guys.

[Olivia March]

No, I don't want that.

[Chelsea Handler]

Yeah, they stink.

[Olivia March]

But you're lucky to be surrounded by so many women.

[Alona March]

Yes. I mean, I think that's helped me to grow even my brand and who I am. The humor I think I have is very much geared towards women and geared towards you guys. So I think it's built me into an amazing person.

[Olivia March]

Yeah, I think we were in such.

[Adrianna March]

A bubble growing up too because in our family it's just women and our dad, it's just women. Like our aunts, our second cousins, like everybody's women.

[Chelsea Handler]

Oh, nice.

[Adrianna March]

So that's slightly protected.

[Chelsea Handler]

So how, how's your dad? How's your dad with all of that?

[Adrianna March]

He's fine. He's all.

[Olivia March]

He loves being around. Yeah, he loves it. He's a proper girl dad like loved supporting us in any way that he could and just being like he put us into sports cuz he learned that that's what makes women confident. That like the top whatever percentile of women in top roles, they played any level of sport growing up. So that's what he made sure to do for all of us.

[Alona March]

So he loved it.

[Olivia March]

He was, he was, yeah, yeah. Great girl dad in that way. Yeah.

[Chelsea Handler]

Girl dads are special. They have a special place in our world.

[Olivia March]

I really do. I'm going to transition us into a section we like to call touch grass. Are you familiar with this expression?

[Chelsea Handler]

Does this mean smoke weed? Well, it could be today. Bring it on. I'm always. I know we're with an athlete so she probably can't smoke weed, especially on camera. But I can always smoke weed.

[Olivia March]

She's not being drug tested right now, so.

[Chelsea Handler]

Oh, perfect. Why not? We have a window. We have a window. Hurry, hurry.

[Olivia March]

Quickly. Okay, so touch grass is an expression used because we're so online these days. We're so out of touch that we need to literally go outside and touch some grass, touch some dirt, get, you know, get down and dirty with what's important, feel the earth beneath you feel the earth beneath you. Remember what's important. Love it. Touch grass and then also athlete. So you know grass field. You get it. This week we want to talk about. You even brought up yourself. People were saying you had a lip flip. You had to look that up. But you're very real about you've had work done and you will talk about it, but whatever. People who lie about having work done, what are your thoughts there?

[Chelsea Handler]

I just feel like it's like, listen, this is my position and everyone's obviously entitled to do whatever the hell they think they wanna do, but I just feel like it's a disservice to other women to pretend that you're not doing something and you look 20 years younger than everybody else or that you like the shame around Ozempic or GLP1s. It's like, I'm on Ozempic or whatever it is now. Tirzepatide is the newest iteration that I'm on. But I know I don't have a weight problem. But I also like to not pig out at the. And I curb my appetite. So I microdose it. I microdose lots of things, but that's how I feel about. Like, you want to share your secrets with other women and share what you're doing and don't. I don't like a false narrative. I don't like lies, and I don't like. I'm a truth teller. So I'll always be honest about, you know, anything that is going to help inform other women.

[Olivia March]

Love that. And it also kind of like. Yeah. Reinforces, like, unrealistic beauty standards if you're not absolutely.

[Chelsea Handler]

I mean, it's like, we live in Hollywood. We know about things that nobody knows about. We knew about salmon sperm facials before salmon knew their sperm was being stolen.

[Olivia March]

And your sisters don't even know about it still.

[Chelsea Handler]

My sisters don't want anything to do with the procedures I get done. I was like, listen, I once got this Morpheus procedure, which is like a serious laser. You look up for about two weeks, okay, you are black and blue. You are swollen. It's crazy. It's like. It's a really painful laser. And I did it all over my arms, too, because I wanted to tighten the skin on my arms. And my sister said, something's so wrong with you. Like, your skin on your arms. And I was like, look, I don't like this. And she goes, you're just like, you've lost the plot. And I'm like, I know, but I live in la. I'm surrounded by these people all the time. I'm easily influenced. When I suggest any sort of procedure to my sister, she's just like, I can't deal with the pain. She's like, you like pain? And I'm like, well, I don't like pain, but I can take the pain to get to the other side, which I'm sure you guys, you could relate to that.

[Olivia March]

Yeah.

[Chelsea Handler]

I mean, in a much different way. In a different way. I'm not calling myself an athlete.

[Alona March]

We were just talking about it, though, because I'm living in LA for a bit. And so when I'm around, like, in Hollywood, I'll go to, like, Dance with the Stars and see people again. And so I'm around just a different form of beauty here than when I'm with my teammates.

[Adrianna March]

Right.

[Alona March]

So when I'm at Dancing with the Stars, it's like very skinny bodies. I'm around those people, and so that's what they're seeing as beauty. But when I'm with my rugby team, it's like, how big is your bicep? How muscular do you look today? How fast can you run? Just different forms of beauty and it's like perspective about who you're around. Yeah. So I'm interested, as I'm here, more in how that will shift your mindset. My mindset, I guess.

[Chelsea Handler]

Well, and it's also easy, you know, like, listen, this town is fucked up. You know, people have taken it too far. There's like, if you're in pursuit of something that abandons who you really are and what you really look like. And we've seen this look all over town. There's girls with lips and balloons and the big asses and the whatever. And then everyone's so skinny and everyone starts to look exactly the same. Like, you look at pictures and you're like, what is that? Is that a face? A glazed donut? Like, it gets very. People can get very out of touch. So with regard to beauty and with regard to procedures and doing stuff, it's like, it's very important to remain the integrity of actually what you look like. You know what I mean?

[Alona March]

Absolutely.

[Chelsea Handler]

You don't want to go and get stuff done where you don't look like yourself. And so it's like the intention of. I always say to my doctor, whenever I'm doing anything, I'm like, I just want to look my age. But youthful, like, well rested and my age make it look like I don't drink.

[Olivia March]

Yeah. And that's the thing is I see People like the standard of beauty now because they've all had the same kind of work done. And I'm like, I'm bored.

[Adrianna March]

When it started, like, a few years ago, like maybe five at that point of, like, the baby Botox, like, you have to start Botox in your 20s for it to really work.

[Chelsea Handler]

Oh.

[Olivia March]

Like early in 1920. Yeah.

[Adrianna March]

It's just I started hearing it so much. I was like, do I need a.

[Alona March]

Little bit of Botox?

[Adrianna March]

And at the time I was like, 21. And I was like, just a little here and there. Cause if I don't start now, then I'm gonna look for me, if that's what they're saying. And I had friends who started to.

[Alona March]

Do it, and I'm like, ooh.

[Adrianna March]

Once I started to see their faces, I was like, we're a little too young for this.

[Alona March]

It doesn't mean I wouldn't, though. I would try these things now. When did you start Botox?

[Adrianna March]

Please don't say 21.

[Chelsea Handler]

No, I didn't.

[Alona March]

She gave age one.

[Chelsea Handler]

I don't think that's true. I think you wait as long as you can, you know, Like, I still don't do a lot of Botox. I do Botox around my eyes for crow's feet, but I want my face to move.

[Alona March]

You have expression.

[Olivia March]

You have very tr.

[Alona March]

She's exasperated.

[Chelsea Handler]

I don't have a frozen face, and I don't want one. I want lines. Like people always say about my lines. They're like, you could get this done. And I'm like, but I'm 50. Why would I want to look like that? I am 50 years old. Yeah. But I'm not going to remove my skin around my eyes.

[Alona March]

Right, right, right, right. You know those faces.

[Chelsea Handler]

So I will do. So when did I start Botox? Probably, like, early 30s, but probably early, like, 30, 31. Because I remember the first time. I remember calling my sisters because I got it done. And I was like, you guys, I did it. You have to start doing Botox. And they're like, you're five and 10 years older than me. So I was always like, the first one to try any procedure and the youngest. But I remember being in my one bedroom apartment in Santa Monica on 23rd street, and I called them. I'm like, I just did Botox. You have to do it meanwhile. And how did it even settle?

[Alona March]

It was like, was it right after?

[Chelsea Handler]

I love finding out about something and then just, like, promoting it. Like, I know for sure it's foolproof and it's the best Solution to anyone's problems.

[Olivia March]

Perfect.

[Chelsea Handler]

Without even having my full experience yet.

[Olivia March]

Yeah, right, right.

[Chelsea Handler]

That's something I do a lot.

[Adrianna March]

As long as you survived it, like.

[Olivia March]

You can recommend it.

[Chelsea Handler]

Yeah, yeah. But M Micro Botox is the way to go when you do it so that you don't have a shiny frozen forehead, you want to, you know.

[Adrianna March]

Interesting.

[Olivia March]

That's my thing is, like, if I ever do it, I want to, like you said, wait as long as I can. So it's a real treat, you know.

[Adrianna March]

Hell yeah.

[Alona March]

You call us up, ladies.

[Chelsea Handler]

I tried it. And the great thing about Botox is it wears off. Yeah, exactly that, you know.

[Olivia March]

True.

[Alona March]

I have a lot of friends in England who do Botox in work because it's so much cheaper, so they start so much younger. Because in England you don't have to be like certify like a nurse or even a doctor to do it. You can get just a certificate, like overnight, basically. You can go to Judy's house and she can give you some Botox for 50 pounds or injectable.

[Chelsea Handler]

I feel like you can do that in la too.

[Alona March]

You probably could, I guess.

[Chelsea Handler]

There's a lot of Botox parties that go on.

[Alona March]

I guess so.

[Olivia March]

A lot of filler, though, for what you're talking about. Like a lot of girls you play.

[Chelsea Handler]

I don't like filler. I would recommend everybody to stay away from filler. It moves once it's in your face. I once got filler, I think it was in my temples and I went skiing and it fell through my face over the course of two weeks. It was like I had these lumps in my face and then I was like, what's happening to me? Because the goggles and the pressure of the goggles, it really filler down. I've never done filler since you got it dissolved.

[Olivia March]

It dissolved when it was down here. Like, what the hell?

[Chelsea Handler]

Yeah, I had to get it dissolved.

[Olivia March]

Nightmare.

[Chelsea Handler]

Yeah, I don't do that. I don't do that. Stick to lasers and stick to little nips and ties. Hey. That way you don't have to fill your face up with garb. You know what I mean?

[Olivia March]

Absolutely.

[Adrianna March]

As you may know, my sisters and I love to eat. We're not shy about it. And I love to eat without worrying if I'm getting all my nutrients.

[Alona March]

And this year we are all going to be more proactive about supporting our immune health.

[Chelsea Handler]

Huh?

[Olivia March]

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[Alona March]

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[Adrianna March]

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[Olivia March]

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[Alona March]

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[Adrianna March]

It's one of the easiest things we can do to support our body every day.

[Olivia March]

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[Alona March]

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[Adrianna March]

That's drinkag1.com mar drinkag1.com mar so good.

[Chelsea Handler]

So good so good.

[Alona March]

New Mark nows up to 70% off.

[Chelsea Handler]

Are at Nordstrom Rack stores now.

[Alona March]

And that means so many new reasons.

[Olivia March]

To rack because I always find something amazing. Just so many good brands.

[Chelsea Handler]

I get an extra 5% off with.

[Olivia March]

My Nordstrom credit card.

[Alona March]

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[Olivia March]

New.

[Chelsea Handler]

Year Same extra value meals at McDonald's.

[Commercial Voice]

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[Chelsea Handler]

And California and for delivery.

[Olivia March]

All right, so touch some grass on lying about things that you've had done. Just be honest about it. Next touch grass point. You recently went on a family vacation that you paid for. You treated everybody.

[Chelsea Handler]

I mean there's a lot of them.

[Olivia March]

True one where you were a bit dissatisfied with your family's behavior.

[Chelsea Handler]

Oh yes, I talk about this in my new tour. I'm doing a big tour, it's called the High and Mighty tour. Starts in February and I regale well. I've been on a lot of family vacations. I like to spoil my family, as I'm sure all of you can relate. And my family keeps growing and getting bigger and just feels like it's not my problem, you know. And also the people that they marry are also not my problem. I feel like they've had children, they've chosen to procreate, they've created these lives and I have extended my generosity for well over 25 years. And on our very last vacation, not our last, I've been on a couple, I've been starting to split up the family. But I realized why am I continuing to expose myself to this? There are so many other people I would like to go on vacation with. And I don't need to be on vacation with my brother's wife. I've been nice to her for 25 years and vacation with her for 25 years. I don't want to hear about Russian conspiracy theories anymore. Not on my vacation.

[Olivia March]

Not on your dollar.

[Chelsea Handler]

I live in America, we have. I don't need to hear about that. So I've started to make edits to my family. I have cut, I have made some cuts and I have made some new rules and those rules are no more. I used to bring everyone to Canada for Christmas. I now over Covid, I got to celebrate Christmas alone. And it was the best Christmas I've ever had, really. And I will never ever celebrate it with probably with another person again because I had the best time.

[Olivia March]

With your dogs?

[Chelsea Handler]

Yeah, with my dogs. I woke up, I had a little mushrooms, some mushrooms. And then I went skiing with my girlfriends. I was home by 6 o' clock at night and I read a book that night, but alone, without a family. And I was like, this is freedom. This is what? Freedom. This is the kind of freedom I wanted as a little kid. And now I've grown up and gotten through all of the milestones of life without accidentally dislodging a baby or getting married and having to get divorced. I've navigated in and away from those situations to the point that now as a 50 year old single woman whose child I feel freedom right now. If I decide to embark on an adventure with a man, it's okay because I got through that tunnel where you would make really bad decisions or maybe not well informed decisions. You know, I don't trust. I didn't trust my decision making When I was in my 20s or, you know, more so in my 30s, and just more so as you get older, you just. The wisdom that comes with age is just not spoken about enough. The confidence and the security knowing that you're the person that got you from here. To hear, like, you did this. Yes, of course there's help along the way, but, like, you're. You're pretty reliable. Like, you're gonna get yourself to the next spot, too.

[Alona March]

Yeah.

[Olivia March]

Yeah. You've figured out all the hardest parts.

[Adrianna March]

Of your life so far.

[Olivia March]

Like, you'll keep doing that. Yeah.

[Chelsea Handler]

I mean, challenges will always arise, but I'm a big proponent of, like, I don't want to face the same challenges multiple times. Like, let's make the first mistake the last time. We have to learn that lesson. I don't want to go to summer school.

[Adrianna March]

Yeah. First and last.

[Olivia March]

First and last. Rich in life and your solo Christmases.

[Chelsea Handler]

Yes.

[Olivia March]

Yes. Love that.

[Adrianna March]

Thanksgiving's still on the table, though.

[Chelsea Handler]

Thanksgiving I'm gonna spend with friends this year. I'm about to go to Antarctica tomorrow, and I come back the day before Thanksgiving. You wanna hear a funny story?

[Alona March]

We would love to hear.

[Olivia March]

Let's actually. Can we transition into tea time? We're gonna move on into our session called tea time. We're gonna get the tea from you.

[Alona March]

Tell us about.

[Olivia March]

Tell us the story.

[Chelsea Handler]

Okay. So I have a residency in Vegas, right. It's at the Cosmo Hotel. It's at the Chelsea Theater. So I'm performing essentially inside myself.

[Olivia March]

Nice.

[Chelsea Handler]

So I always have different friends come out for each show. I had a group of girlfriends and some friends from New York came out this past show. We go, we gamble after the show. I give everybody money so that nobody has to spend their money. I give everyone money. I'm like, we're gambling now. Since I'm forcing you to gamble, you can use my money. We gamble. Everyone loses my money. I'm like. Like that. So we leave. We go the next night. We stay one extra night in Vegas to see Alanis Morissette. We go to her concert. She's amazing. Incredible. My second time seeing her. And afterward, I was like, hey, I lost $3,000 the night before. You guys lost all my money. I need to go back to the casino and win this back.

[Olivia March]

Right?

[Chelsea Handler]

So they were like, okay, well, we'll come with you. And I'm like, you guys are bad juju. Like, I don't need your bad luck. I will win on my own. So I took my one finger. Terrence, he and I went Back to the. We went back to the Cosmo Hotel. We just sat down at a random table, and there's this guy at the end of the table with this big cowboy hat on. And I was, you know, pretty loosey goosey at this time of night, right? And I had no chips left because my friends had lost all my money. And he had tons of chips, and he was, like, a younger guy, younger than me, and just like a cowboy. And I just assumed he was, like, some Texan, you know, cowboy Republican. And I said, sir, I'm gonna need to borrow a thousand. Like, I don't have any chips left, but I'm gonna win it right back, and then I'll pay you back. I won his money back. I paid him back interest. I gave him 2,000 back.

[Alona March]

Whoa.

[Chelsea Handler]

Then I proceeded to spend the night there, winning back all my money that my friends had lost. So we have this great time. Blah, blah, blah. We leave. Once I got my money, I'm not greedy. Cause I got the money that I had lost. I got it back. I was like, let's go, Terrence. Good night. I wake up in the morning, and there's these texts from the sky. And I say to my friend Terrence, like, who's. Did I give that guy my phone number last night? He goes, yeah, he asked for the cowboy hat guy. And I was like, cowboy hat guy? I gave him my phone number. I'm like, that guy from Texas. He's like, he's not from Texas, and he's not a Republican. You called him a Texas Republican, like, 10 times. He's from Florida, and he's a really nice guy. And his brother and he owned this big company or some company. And I was like, I don't remember any of that. And he's like, well, he was really cute, but you weren't interested. And I was like, oh. So this guy starts texting me. So I respond. I said, thank you so much for the loan. Blah, blah, blah. And he goes, I would love to come to one of your shows in Vegas. I would love to come back. And would you be willing to hang out again? And we can drink, smoke, gamble, whatever you're into, but would you be open to, like, you know, making me, like, commit to spending time with him? And I'm like, you can come to Vegas, but I'm not making any commitment to anything. And he goes, I'm just. I'm not trying to be creepy or anything. He goes, but you seem very adventurous. And I'm at a point in my life where I'M looking for more adventures. And so I copy. I sent him the link for my Antarctica trip. And I said, well, if you're looking for adventure, this is a trip I'm going on in next week. And then 24 hours later, he's like, I'll see you in Antarctica.

[Alona March]

No.

[Chelsea Handler]

So I am leaving tomorrow on this trip to Antarctica, which you have to fly to Buenos Aires, and then you fly to Patagonia. Then we take a boat off of. From Patagonia over Drake's Passage to Antarctica. And I'm going with one of my girlfriends from Whistler. But this guy's also coming.

[Olivia March]

What?

[Chelsea Handler]

So this has just got all the makings of my. Of a classic Chelsea story.

[Olivia March]

I love.

[Chelsea Handler]

I love the way it started, and I love where it's going.

[Alona March]

I actually love that.

[Olivia March]

Yeah.

[Alona March]

A man who's taking some action.

[Chelsea Handler]

Yes.

[Alona March]

Do you remember his mouth?

[Chelsea Handler]

Well, he sent me his Instagram there, and I went through it. It's very cute. He's not really my type, but who cares about that? Because I like the move.

[Olivia March]

Yeah. If he flies Antarctica for you.

[Chelsea Handler]

What I want, what I've always written, whenever I've written down what I'm looking for in a partner, it is somebody who has the interest in traveling and the ability, financial capability to do so. Like, I don't want to pay for somebody to come with me and have, like, you know what I mean? I'm not interested. I've done that enough with my family, and I'm not even having sex with those people.

[Alona March]

So we were just discussing it, too. Cause I've seen some men in the past who don't make a lot of money. What are your thoughts on that? Like, when I spend time with them, because I now have a certain lifestyle I like to uphold and certain dinners I like to do, but I don't think they make a lot of money. Is it okay? Like, usually the thing is, you know, find a rich man or whatever. And then Cher says, I am a rich man or whatever. But how do you deal with that?

[Olivia March]

And people say, date in your tax bracket or whatever. Like, what are your thoughts?

[Chelsea Handler]

I've never been, like, I've always been able to take care of myself. So that has never been the reason to be with somebody, nor should it be. Obviously. It really is about character. But it's also. There is a. There's a difference between not having a lot of money and being broke. Being broke is not hot. Being broke means you don't have your shit together. Being broke means can imply laziness. I Don't. As long as you're not lazy, then I can work with that. I don't need you to buy me jewelry. I can buy all of that shit for myself. And I don't even care about jewelry. I don't care about all of that stuff. What I need is something that you have to be in addition to my life. Not a subtraction and not a subtraction that I'm paying for. Also, I'm not flying you back and forth to meet me. I've done that and I've done the rich guy. So I have a full spectrum of experience. And it's much more comfortable dating somebody that takes care of themself and has a future, you know, broke is just. No, then you better be really good at a bunch of other things.

[Olivia March]

Right?

[Chelsea Handler]

You know, and not just. I don't mean like, I mean around the house. I mean driving, skiing, cooking.

[Olivia March]

Cooking. Installing shelves.

[Chelsea Handler]

Chip in. In every other way.

[Alona March]

Fix a car.

[Olivia March]

Yeah, fix a car. Know what that sounds is your car's making.

[Alona March]

Change my tire.

[Chelsea Handler]

Right, yeah.

[Adrianna March]

Domestic labor.

[Olivia March]

God. Okay.

[Alona March]

That is good to hear, though.

[Olivia March]

Yeah. That's a salad of experience is what you've had, it seems.

[Chelsea Handler]

Yeah, I've had a mixed salad, definitely. I don't have the type. I just try to be open minded and look for something that I haven't had before.

[Adrianna March]

If he wanted to, he would go to Antarctica, right?

[Chelsea Handler]

Yeah. Like, I like that initiative when he made. He said, I'll see you in Antarctica. I was like, you know what? I think I might like this guy. There's potential now, because if that's a strong decision, that's an expensive trip, you know, I was like, oh, this guy's got his shit together.

[Olivia March]

What do you do in Antarctica once you get there?

[Chelsea Handler]

You go on expeditions. Oh, so I'm going to a psychedelic conference. If I hadn't made that clear yet in this interview. I love psychedelics. I love microdosing. So this is a. It's an organization called Maps, and there's a guy that runs it called Rick Goblin. And so it's basically like all the studies that show how much psychedelics now in microdose form or in journey type situations, help people with ptsd, help people with, you know, delayed grief or personalized trauma or anything that may have happened that you need therapy for. So that's the backdrop. It's a kind of psychedelic conference about all the benefits of that. And then you go on, like, excursions. Like you go see the penguins one day, you go on icebergs. You can go skiing. You're in Antarctica, so there's lots of action and activity. You can polar plunge.

[Olivia March]

I've seen this. But you gotta get strapped in first, right? You gotta be on like a tether.

[Chelsea Handler]

Yeah, well, that's actually probably the way to do it. Cuz then they got to lift you.

[Olivia March]

Back up exactly when you're too cold to get out.

[Chelsea Handler]

I. I'd rather step down off of like a step ladder and then lose. Lose my nerve halfway through.

[Olivia March]

Right.

[Adrianna March]

You got.

[Chelsea Handler]

I think you have to punch because.

[Adrianna March]

I think if you feel it first, you're not done.

[Olivia March]

Get. Get strapped in with the tether, jump in.

[Chelsea Handler]

What if they don't get me out?

[Alona March]

They will.

[Olivia March]

That's the point of it.

[Chelsea Handler]

See, that gives me more anxiety than me doing it myself.

[Olivia March]

You have a Texas Republican there to pull you out?

[Chelsea Handler]

No, I did not. He's from Florida, which is almost worse than Texas at this point.

[Olivia March]

I was like, oh.

[Chelsea Handler]

I mean, I wasn't happy about Florida either. But I like the idea that you're like, just assuming this person's gonna be your boyfriend. You're like, well, if he lives in Florida, it's like, who gives a shit where he lives? I'll probably never see him again after this. We'll see.

[Alona March]

We'll see.

[Chelsea Handler]

I'll keep you guys posted.

[Olivia March]

I love that we're on the precipice of this.

[Chelsea Handler]

I know. I do too, because it's been. It's been a minute since I've had a guy that I was interested in. Like, it's been a minute. I've kind of been really busy and it's just not in the front. I'm not a boy crazy girl. I've never been that way. And I haven't had a boyfriend recently. So I was like, God, I wonder when I'm gonna be interested in someone. So to walk into like a casino, sit down next to somebody randomly for an hour, and then have it all kind of come out. Like this kind of feels like, oh, this is exactly what I should be doing.

[Olivia March]

It's cosmic, right?

[Chelsea Handler]

Fun. I mean, cute.

[Alona March]

And would you have him come to your show? So you won't be in the residency for a bit, but would you love if he came to that?

[Chelsea Handler]

Yeah, he's welcome to come. I mean, anyone's welcome to come. Yeah, I don't have a problem with that. With a guy seem. Perform, you mean?

[Alona March]

Yeah. Or like, you know, because your shows are also like, we. We've watched a couple and it's very much the women's Subject, like, we found it to be hilarious. And I think men would also find it very funny as well.

[Chelsea Handler]

A real man, to be able to deal with me. A lot of straight men can't hang with me or they don't want to. They are like, shut her up. She is so annoying and so obnoxious. Yes, I've had problems with straight men. My. They always are telling me to take it down a notch. And I'm like, why? I'm just acting like a man.

[Alona March]

Why?

[Olivia March]

Ooh, I love that.

[Chelsea Handler]

Yeah.

[Alona March]

Where does like your sense of comedy come from and how your sense of humor, like, for me, I think my sisters and how we were raised. Was it your family as well? Or was it. Did you ever feel like the outlier and that's kind of where you got from as being the baby?

[Chelsea Handler]

It was my family for sure. Our parents were ridiculous. My father was a used car dealer and there were cars all over our driveway, like car parts. Did you ever see that show Sanford and Son? Have you ever heard of that? It's like the show from the 70s and they're like car parts, tires strewn throughout our driveway. And we lived in this like nice middle class neighborhood in New Jersey, so it was really embarrassing. Cause we stuck out like a sore thumb. And my mom was German and like, very quiet and antisocial. She didn't like the other mothers or like communicating with them or socializing with them. So it was like kind of, you know, she was kind of just put off by all of it. And so by the time they had me, they were so done with being parents that I was on my own. I was like, okay. I would literally be like, I'm going away for the weekend and I'll be back Sunday night so I can go to school Monday. I was seven. I mean, I'd be like, I'm going with my friend's family to the Catskills. And my mom's like, we'll see you when you get home. I'm like, bye. They would drop me off at school and completely forget to be. And then I'd come storming. Like I'd walk through a snowstorm. They once dropped me off at Hebrew school. Completely forgot to pick me up. And there's this guy Isaac, this janitor at our Hebrew school that worked there. And he knew all my brothers and sisters. And I would come out and there would be this like carpool lanes for everybody's parents to line up to pick up their kids. And every Sunday I would come out and I'd be like, are they gonna come? Is this gonna be the weekend that they pick me up? And every week. And no one would carpool with us because they knew my parents were so unreliable. So every weekend Isaac would come out and be like, they're late again, huh? And I'd be like, yeah. And then one day it was snowing and I was like, you know what? He's like, okay, I'll call them. And he would call them and then they would come pick me up. And I was like, you know what? This is an opportunity to teach those two a lesson. I'm like, I'm gonna walk home. And I walked home like two and a half miles in a snowstorm and just opened the front door. And I was like nine years old, okay? And so I had my hat, my gloves, and I was like, I have pneumonia now. And I was like, and I'm not to going for three days because neither one of you even thought to pick me up. I'm nine. And then I charged up to my room and they were like, oh, she's mad this time. So I mean, it was like, funny. The backdrop of our childhood was funny because my parents were just so, like half assed, you know, I wrote myself notes if I wanted to leave school. Like I watched this soap opera, Santa Barbara was on every day at 3. So I would sign myself out at 2:30, like three times a week. I'd be like, chelsea has a dental appointment. Chelsea's having dental. Chelsea has to. Meanwhile, nothing was wrong with my teeth, so the teachers were stupid for allowing me to continue to write that. And then I would sign myself out of school. I'd get home in half an hour before school ended so I could watch my soap opera. Like, I was basically running my parents household at a very young age. But to answer your question, my whole family is very funny. We're very sarcastic. So it's that kind of humor. Like everything is very dry and under your breath. And like, no one is like effusive or happy or earnest. No one is like that in our family.

[Olivia March]

Do you run into problems with the dryness? Because we run into that. We're all trying to date, but we are dating men who cannot take sarcasm or like, I guess we poke fun of as a way of flirting because like, we poke fun at each other. That means I've noticed something about you. Cause I'm paying attention and I care, but then men take offense to it. Do you. Have you noticed that? Has that been a mention?

[Chelsea Handler]

I mean, I've noticed a lot of things that men are finding offensive that I don't really have time for.

[Olivia March]

Right.

[Chelsea Handler]

I've spent my life being offensive and being offended. So which one should I focus on? You know, I mean, it's amazing that they're offended now. I mean, really, now we have to deal with your hurt feelings. We just got over our hurt feelings. It's a lot I love.

[Adrianna March]

How do you think you've grown as a comedian from your 30s to today?

[Chelsea Handler]

Like this tour. I took a six month break off of. Sorry, six year break off of doing standup when I left my Netflix show. I did my Chelsea Lately show for seven years. Then I did some series documentaries for Netflix. Then I did. Did a talk show for two years. And when that ended, I was like, okay. I wanted to just stop doing everything. I didn't wanna work. I was burnt out. I had done my books and my standup and my shows for so long in a row, in succession. And so I took six years off of standup and when I came back to it, I kinda had to rebuild my audience and like start. And I've done three specials in four years. Five. This'll be my fourth door in five years.

[Olivia March]

Wow. So.

[Chelsea Handler]

So I came back and I was just kind of like a mature fine wine in the terms of a being having so much gratitude for the audience that remained. That stuck with me. And then also for the actual art of getting up on stage and providing people with a reprieve from their daily lives and a reprieve from politics. A reprieve from all of the things that are stressful. Like to be an arbiter of joy, to be on stage and to look out and see sisters or daughters and mothers sitting there and strangers sitting next to each other laughing and like hitting each other on their arms. Like, to me, that is the definition of being an entertainer. To be able to bring that out, to come out on stage and set a tone and bring the vibe up so that when people leave, they leave higher.

[Olivia March]

Love that.

[Chelsea Handler]

So that's why it's called the High and Mighty tour, because I want you to be high and I will most likely be high as well.

[Alona March]

And what do you think makes a good comedy show? Like when we were watching yours, you had some physical comedy as well. I love the masturbation. Physical comedy, that was really great to me. Like, I think that's great, but it's not over the top at times. Like some comedians that go across the floor, right. You work with intonation and such.

[Olivia March]

You got running bits that you just, you pick up on your virgin Version.

[Alona March]

That one we found hilarious.

[Olivia March]

Every time he said that, oh my.

[Adrianna March]

God, she's done it again.

[Chelsea Handler]

Yeah, she likes you. Well, she was a virgin for a really long time. She's almost, she's. I mean, she's somebody who could turn back into a virgin because she probably spent more, more time being a virgin than not being a virgin.

[Adrianna March]

Born again.

[Alona March]

Born again.

[Chelsea Handler]

But I mean, it's all personal stories. So I think there are two types of comics that I'm aware of. There are people that just get up and tell jokes and then there are people that are storytellers. And I'm a storyteller. I like to tell my personal stories. I like to take the funniest, most ridiculous kind of aspects of my life and combine them all into like one big story. Like people will say or have said about me that I'm outrageous. But I wanna be outrageous. I wanna live in out. So my experiences are real. Like I don't manufacture them. Sometimes I add a person to the mix for the purpose of a story or I change the location for the purpose of a punchline, but I don't make it up. Like, my family will always be like, is that part true? Like, my sister will be like, that didn't happen. And my other sister's like, that totally happened. You weren't there for that. You know, like they sometimes think I'm making it up. I'm like, no. So I think the art of like, you know, it's the same with writing books. I'm sharing my personal stuff. And if you are sharing that in an honest, you have to share the good stuff and the bad stuff. You can't cherry pick what you want people to see about you. Like, I'm beautiful and ugly. I have all of those things and I'm going to share them. I'm not shy or embarrassed about any of them. You know, I have a great body, I have cellulite. I get, you know, like, you know, all of the things that girls can be quiet about or try to hide. It's like, no, no, no, let's just show ourselves. And that's how I feel about storytelling. I feel, I feel like, you know, you edit for other people's feelings, not your own. You know, I kind of spare other people, not family members. Cause I feel like, you know, they deserve it.

[Olivia March]

Yeah, they are.

[Chelsea Handler]

And they've been with me my whole life. It's like that's where most of my material comes from. And it's a never ending well. So I don't know if that answered.

[Olivia March]

Your question, that's kind of special, though. That's like. Yeah, you'd give the ugly, you give the beautiful. And in a book, it's like, there you go. You have it. When you're on of top, you get to see it affect people. Like, you say they're hitting each other's arms. You get to see your kind of storytelling in motion.

[Chelsea Handler]

Yeah, it's just great to walk out into a theater and just have these thunderous applause. And I think that was probably a big component of what was missing in my first half of my career. I wasn't as grateful as I am now about it. Like, I want to be present. I want to be there. I want to make sure that you leave here feeling excellent and lighter, you know, and to be laughing and. And joyfulness like I feel right now in the world, that is the most important contribution one can make is contributing to other people's joy.

[Olivia March]

Full stop. Period.

[Alona March]

Full stop.

[Chelsea Handler]

God.

[Olivia March]

Okay, so how long will the tour be?

[Chelsea Handler]

The tour will. Well, I'm starting out. The tour will be. I announced 40 cities. You can get [e-mail], but we'll probably add another 40 for the rest of the year.

[Olivia March]

Perfect.

[Chelsea Handler]

So it'll end up probably being about 80 to 100 shows for the year. But that's my jam, girls. That's what I do.

[Alona March]

Are you in a tour bus and you just go around?

[Chelsea Handler]

No, no, those are for boys of. I fly on planes, of course.

[Alona March]

Of course.

[Chelsea Handler]

Yes. Yes, that's right. I dated somebody who went on a tour bus, and I smelled that tour bus, and there were about seven men on that tour bus. And it smells like a sock that farted.

[Olivia March]

Right.

[Chelsea Handler]

It was disgusting.

[Olivia March]

Perfect.

[Chelsea Handler]

And no, I don't think. I don't know that many women take tour buses, but I could be wrong. But I prefer a flight.

[Olivia March]

Do you settle into any kind of routines? Cause even flying, I imagine tour is very rough on any kind of routine or your system. What do you kind of settle into?

[Chelsea Handler]

I mean, I'm really into electrolytes. I'm really into that. I mean, I'm not. You know, everyone's the water. It's just everyone's always trying to force you to drink water. Water, water. It's like, I'm so sick of hearing about water. I mean, is it really that important? Because nobody gave me water until I was fucking 40 years old. Nobody gave me water when I was in elementary school.

[Alona March]

True.

[Chelsea Handler]

We had orange juice, milk, and Capri Suns.

[Olivia March]

That's what I mean. And like, 2% milk?

[Chelsea Handler]

Yeah. Nobody was like, here, have some water. So this whole water thing is like, I don't trust it. I don't know that we need all this water, and I don't trust it.

[Adrianna March]

Like, electrolytes. Where did the electrolytes come from?

[Chelsea Handler]

Well, now and then. Now they say if you drink too much water, you'll get dehydrated. It's like, well, which one is it? And then they say the electrolytes are the most important part. And I'm like, well, then can I just have the electrolytes? Yeah, I'll snort those.

[Olivia March]

And why are we just getting those from water?

[Adrianna March]

Yeah.

[Chelsea Handler]

I don't know. It's very confusing. I know. I know. Dogs need water. I believe that.

[Olivia March]

Believe in that.

[Chelsea Handler]

But I don't believe that we need as much water as they are telling us we need.

[Alona March]

I agree. Because when you go to Europe, you know, in America, when you get a big pint glass, when you come to a restaurant and then in Europe set.

[Olivia March]

It down, maybe forget to put it.

[Alona March]

On, and then that's it. They're thriving over there.

[Chelsea Handler]

Do you feel a difference? Well, I mean, this is gonna be an obvious answer, but I'll ask the question anyway. Do you feel a big, vast performance difference when you're dehydrated? Like, do you feel that water makes a huge difference in your performance?

[Alona March]

I don't think so, but they're always. You always have to weigh yourself in. So you weigh yourself in before you play, and then you weigh yourself out to see how much water you've lost. And if you've lost too much, you have to really rehydrate. And so they're always pushing water on you. We have to do pee tests constantly to see how hydrated we are. But I. Whenever I do a P test, I'm always supposedly dehydrated. And I was like. I was chugging water until I went to bed, and I may.

[Adrianna March]

Three times water.

[Olivia March]

Yeah.

[Alona March]

How am I not. How am I dehydrated? I just don't believe it.

[Chelsea Handler]

How much water weight can you lose in one session?

[Alona March]

You could lose about, like, six pounds if it's really hot. Oh, and so that's not good then, right? Yeah, you don't want to be losing that. So, like, normally you'd lose like a. You know, a pound or two pounds like that. Like, if it's a very hot session you're working out, so you need to, like, they're thrusting water in your face. Wow. I as well don't believe it, especially when I have to do this hydration testing. I'm always dehydrated.

[Chelsea Handler]

And when you're dehydrated, do they give you salt?

[Alona March]

Yep. You have to do that. Like, they'll just salt extra things. We've done, like, salt tests too, where you put, like, a salt patch on, see how much salt you've lost when you've dehashed.

[Chelsea Handler]

Yeah, but also, there's also water in everything we're eating. Yeah, there's water in bagels, there's water in fish. Have another piece of fish, you know? Why do I have to have so much water?

[Alona March]

Have some salt.

[Chelsea Handler]

Just throw some salt in your mouth and that way you'll hold on to whatever water's in there.

[Olivia March]

That's her. I've got a thing of Maldon salt. You know, that fancy crystallized stuff. She eats it by the hands. Do you?

[Alona March]

I love salt.

[Chelsea Handler]

You eat it a la carte.

[Olivia March]

Yeah, la carte.

[Alona March]

She's done that.

[Olivia March]

She used to be, when she was a kid, in restaurants, she would lick the top of salt things. And my mom would be like, ah, before she could like.

[Alona March]

Those restaurants.

[Adrianna March]

Salty liquid. She chugs like a hot sauce. Pickle juice.

[Olivia March]

She chugs pickle juice.

[Adrianna March]

We keep empty pickle juice containers in the fridge. Like, once you eat all the pickles.

[Olivia March]

Because she'll have the pepperoncinis.

[Alona March]

Yeah.

[Chelsea Handler]

So what's the dynamic between you three? Who's in charge?

[Olivia March]

She's oldest.

[Alona March]

She's classic oldest. I don't know what I am.

[Olivia March]

You're classic middle.

[Alona March]

I'm classic middle.

[Olivia March]

Bit of a troublemaker, but also like.

[Chelsea Handler]

Have you guys ever read the book Birth Order?

[Olivia March]

No. We gotta.

[Chelsea Handler]

Oh, really?

[Olivia March]

Get rid of this.

[Chelsea Handler]

The Sibling Effect and Birth Order are good books about, like, families and numbers and child numbers. They kind of say the same thing but in a different way.

[Olivia March]

Okay, and do you guys fit that, you and your sisters?

[Chelsea Handler]

Yeah.

[Olivia March]

Okay.

[Chelsea Handler]

Yeah. Because when you have more than three, it repeats. The pattern repeats. So it goes. We had three boys and then three girls. So if the first oldest isn't the responsible type A1, then the second one will take that position. If the oldest is a fuck up and, like, ends up being, like, a drug user or whatever, then the second one becomes in charge. But usually it's the oldest in the middle, and then the youngest one is the rebellious crazy one, typically speaking. And then the pattern starts, then it repeats again. You go, three, two, one. Three, two, one.

[Olivia March]

Her rebellion was trying theater instead of sports at one point. Oh, really? As they got no.

[Chelsea Handler]

Well, that means she's Doing a good job keeping you in line as the oldest.

[Olivia March]

Now, she did steal alcohol from our parents when we never did.

[Adrianna March]

So our dad famously, like, collects alcohol. And so I was very smart, and I would take a shot from each bottle instead of just going after one bottle. So they never noticed it went lower.

[Chelsea Handler]

That is smart.

[Adrianna March]

And of course, I'd have sleepovers with my. My friends, and they never caught on.

[Olivia March]

Yeah, whatever.

[Adrianna March]

But they were like golden children.

[Chelsea Handler]

You set such a perfect example.

[Adrianna March]

They're also not very social in high school.

[Chelsea Handler]

Oh, really?

[Adrianna March]

So all of a sudden, I have this, like, era of, like, not air, but, like, there was like, well, you're so cool in high school. I was like, I don't think I was. I just.

[Olivia March]

To us, that seemed cool.

[Adrianna March]

It was much cooler than you guys.

[Chelsea Handler]

My oldest sister was the coolest. My second sister, the virgin. You know how that is.

[Alona March]

Of course.

[Chelsea Handler]

And then I was just a helion. Like, just great. Crazy, fucking crazy. Like, my parents, almost. My mom, like, I feel so bad for the way that I acted. You know, My mom has passed away, and so has my father, thank God. Cause he was a real pain in the ass. But my mom, I like, when I think about what I put her through as a teenager. I was just out of my mind. And I couldn't wait to be free from the family. I was like, I just need to get away from this family.

[Olivia March]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Chelsea Handler]

I need to start my own future, you know? Like, I want to. If I could have moved when I was 13, I would have.

[Olivia March]

Yeah.

[Adrianna March]

I've apologized to my mom a few times.

[Alona March]

I'm like, have you?

[Adrianna March]

I'm so sorry. Cause I was like. I look back on how I acted.

[Alona March]

I was like, fucking nightmare.

[Adrianna March]

I was a little nightmare.

[Chelsea Handler]

That's nice that you apologize. Yeah. While you still have her. Because, I mean, when I say I'm sorry to my mom, I don't know who I'm talking to. I'm sorry, Mom.

[Olivia March]

You hope she's hearing it right.

[Chelsea Handler]

Yeah. So that's nice.

[Olivia March]

You're the youngest, though. But the way that you are, such a proponent for speaking your mind, telling women to say exactly what they want, what they feel. It's how you are. Do you almost feel, though, like a big sister to your audiences in that way? Even though you are.

[Chelsea Handler]

And especially on my podcast, too. Like, it's a call in podcast, so people call in for advice. And it's called Dear Chelsea. So, like. Cause I am like, that's how I always feel, like a big sister. Like, I'm always Gonna tell you the truth, whether you're a close friend of mine or a stranger. If you're a woman especially, it's like, I got your back, you know? Like, if you need to know if you have food in your teeth, I'll tell you if you have food in your teeth. If you need advice on a problem and you need someone's opinion who's actually not involved in that problem, which is the most objective opinion you can get, I'll tell you the truth. So I do feel like a big sister in many ways. In many respects. I feel like a big sister to my sisters in many ways, even though I'm the youngest. So, you know, I'm like, I'm decisive, and I can make decisions, and I, like, get things. I can make things happen.

[Olivia March]

You say what needs to be said. An elephant and you have never been in the same room together is what I'm hearing. Right.

[Adrianna March]

So your mom was a German immigrant, right?

[Chelsea Handler]

Yes.

[Adrianna March]

Do you think you get a lot.

[Olivia March]

Of those that, like, is, like.

[Adrianna March]

What do you call it? From Germany? Like, very German of you.

[Olivia March]

Very direct.

[Chelsea Handler]

I wasn't that kind of German. She was very soft and demure. She was, like, very ladylike. So she was a little horrified by my mouth, you know, she was like, what is this child that I have? Like, I was so boisterous and precocious and just didn't care what anyone. Like, I just was like a bull in a china shop. But my mom was very sweet and, like, understood. Like, my dad would always go, what are we gonna do with her? What's wrong with her about me? He'd be like, something'. And my mom would be like, she just needs to grow up and shake it out. She just needs to. She needs to shake it out. Like, she'll get older and she'll calm down. And my dad's like, I don't know. We've never seen the one like this before. Like, they were, like, scared for my future.

[Olivia March]

Uncharted territory.

[Chelsea Handler]

Yeah. They didn't know what to do.

[Adrianna March]

Interesting.

[Chelsea Handler]

Yeah, they were worried that I was gonna go down the wrong path and, you know, have a teenage pregnancy or, you know, marry a drug dealer. Like, they just thought I was going off the rails, and I probably was headed in that direction. Direction. But I always was able to recognize that at the last minute and pivot.

[Alona March]

In some of your stories, we, I guess, don't know, ages. Like, you say, when you're 10 years old, you're, you know, doing a hard lemonade stand. I was like, what did 10 I don't know what a 10 year old looks like.

[Olivia March]

Yeah, we can't picture a 10 year old.

[Alona March]

Good thoughts and feelings, I guess I didn't know they could understand things. Like I could put, I put a 10 year old and a 4 year old next to each other.

[Olivia March]

You'd be like, wait a second, you.

[Chelsea Handler]

Wouldn'T know the difference.

[Alona March]

I just, I'm like, wow. But they all, they're really sentient beings.

[Chelsea Handler]

They really are.

[Olivia March]

They have feelings about businesses. The most sentient business owner At 10.

[Chelsea Handler]

Years old, you know, like, you know.

[Alona March]

How to dream, right?

[Chelsea Handler]

Right. You have dreams, you know where you want your life to go. Maybe not how you're gonna get there, but you definitely have an idea of what you're interested in and what you're not. When I went on a first plane ride with my parents or with my family and saw the first class section, I was like, that's my group right there. Those are the people that I'm gonna be hanging out with, I belong with. Where are you guys sitting? We're actually all going to the back. We're all gonna sit and coat and I'm like, I'm not for long. The next time I'm on this plane, I will be flying first class. And I did. Yeah, it was only three years later, but I did. At 13 years old, I bought my own first class ticket and I haven't flown coach since, to be honest.

[Olivia March]

Right, good for you. Well, I mean, she's obviously been elevating herself in the world and we still take flights together and she obviously boards first and she gets into that section and then we have to walk by her and we're like, hey dude. And that's changing ever so slowly.

[Alona March]

Kind of. Yeah.

[Chelsea Handler]

They're demoting you back to coach, it sounds like.

[Alona March]

Well, whenever I go back to rugby, so like when I'm in doing, you know, deals for people and I'll go here and you know, I get flown business or first and this is how it is. But then when I go back with my rugby team, you know, that's like 30 plus people they travel with and we don't have a lot of money in rugby and so I really get back down to my roots and we all travel back to coach together. There was one flight, we were supposed to do like a 16 hour flight to Sydney and I got a call.

[Olivia March]

From her, she was like, you got to see what you can do. You gotta get me out of the coach, you gotta get me up there if you can. I'm like, oh. And I was calling everybody at the airline and they were like, it's a group ticket. Can't move anybody.

[Alona March]

I'm prepared to pay a lot of money too. Yeah, I never would. I was prepared to pay a ton of money, but because it was a group ticket, I went to the desk, I went here, I went here, and they would not let me upgrade. And I was like, well, you just lost out on business, and so you're a big mistake.

[Chelsea Handler]

That gets them all the time.

[Olivia March]

Also, hard lemonade stand at 10 years old and now you have a hard lemonade brand, right?

[Chelsea Handler]

Yeah, I started the hard lemonade. First of all, I opened up a regular lemonade stand with my sister, the virgin one. And I was like, listen, I will, I'll hire you at a day rate. And we can. And she was like, 50, 50 for the lemonade stand. She was five years older than me. I'm like, 50, 50. This is my concept. I'm like, I came up with it. And she's like, concept? It's a lemonade stand. Every kid is doing it. And I'm like, but I'm the one who made the. Like initiated this, so we're not. So I worked one day with her. We sold regular lemonade. We did not make a big profit of margin. There was no profit of margin margin. So I had to reduce my staff. And so at the end of the day, I said, listen, this isn't gonna work. I don't want you here. And actually I'm gonna start serving alcohol, but to, you know, raise the profits. So I went back to my parents house. They weren't drinkers, so I had to go to a neighbor's house on Martha's Vineyard and just, I got gin, whiskey, tequila, and I brought it all to the lemonade stand. The next day I went around the neighborhood of all the little kids that rented in the area. I got this little boy named Nelson. He was 10 years old. I'm like, nelson, do you know how to mix a drink? I have a lemonade stand and I need a bo. And I was like. And then I knew I was gonna, I could pay Nelson whatever I wanted. He didn't even, you know, what a job was. It was only 10. And I was advanced. And I. We went, we did our lemonade stand. It was huge hit. Parents would come by, we'd make them mixed drinks. If anybody was over 10, they could also order a drink. You know, I wasn't a stickler for rules. And then we made a crazy amount of money, like hundreds of dollars. And I Gave him like, I think if we made $349 in two weeks, I gave him $3.49 as his commission. He's looking for the experience and he's lucky for that.

[Alona March]

He tells that story for sure to this day.

[Chelsea Handler]

Yeah. I wonder if he's put it together that it's me that did that to him. Cause that would be even better story if I came face to face with Nelson one day. Because that's happened in my life with my ridiculous stories. I will run into that person and they'll be like, you know what you did? And I'm like, no, tell me.

[Olivia March]

You said he's younger than you. But I was like, what if it's the man meeting you in Antarctica? What if that was Nelson?

[Chelsea Handler]

I know that would be a real full circle, then I would really start to believe in some woo woo shit, isn't it? Yeah, real woo woo.

[Olivia March]

I just had a question about, you know, you say what's on your mind, you tell it as it is. You don't hold anything back. Who do you go to for that same treatment? If you want advice.

[Chelsea Handler]

If I want advice or just the real or just. There's not a lot of people that I go to for advice. I have a psychiatrist that I go to when I really have to deal with something that's. I saw him yesterday, I have a situation I'm dealing with and I went to him for his feedback. So he's somebody I go to for like that kind of stuff for like, if it's career advice, I go to my manager or I go to my agent. But if it's something like I really need advice on, I try to exercise this kind of really like sitting with yourself when you have a decision to make and listening to your female intuition because it's there for. And with everything that is going on in the world and society and social media, we tend to lose touch with that voice. And women are so fucking powerful and so intuitive. So I've learned that that works for me almost every time whenever I have that hair of a feeling that something's off. Like, I know now, don't do that, don't do that. Even if it's just the slightest thing, you can't make me do something that I feel that way about. So I just really try to practice listening to my own voice, my own inner voice. Your body knows what's up and your body knows when you should go towards something or go away from something. So I wish more women were able to. Some women, especially when people call into dear Chelsea. They're like, how do you know what that voice mean? Like, how do you know when to listen to that voice or what it feels like to know that voice? And it's like. It's very hard to describe because it's just a knowing. It's like an instinct that you have to be able to be in touch with yourself enough to hear it and trusting yourself.

[Olivia March]

I think that's the truth.

[Chelsea Handler]

And you have to sit alone quietly, whether it's meditating or whether it's just being without any of the noise that comes with life. And really listen and you'll get your answer.

[Adrianna March]

Love that.

[Alona March]

Love that.

[Olivia March]

No phones, no distractions.

[Alona March]

I know.

[Chelsea Handler]

Just that we've all got to throw our phones in the garbage. I'm going to leave my.

[Olivia March]

Lock it up, do that, attach it to. Actually, no strap for it. Straight into the water after the plunge.

[Chelsea Handler]

Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. Well, I have a waterproof bag, too. I'll be there texting underneath the wall. Can you imagine? It'll free plunge. My friend goes, say hello to Santa Claus. I'm like, that's the wrong one.

[Olivia March]

Wrong one.

[Chelsea Handler]

Like, you might say hello to Santa. You might see Santa before I see him.

[Olivia March]

Maybe evil Santa lives down there. Something like that, maybe. Can you describe a time in your life when something shook your confidence and how you can listen?

[Chelsea Handler]

I don't think that ever goes away. Like, there's always things in life that are gonna shake you up. It's about how much better we get at recognizing those moments and knowing that it's not a failure. Oh, this is a sign. This is a sign that I have to, like, elevate or, you know, like, strengthen and be above it. Like, treat it differently than I would treat anything before. And when I say that, I mean, like, it's kind of what I was saying earlier. Like, don't repeat the same things over and over. If you handle a situation poorly once, try not to make a habit out of handling a situation poorly. So when I was probably in my, like, 27ish or something, I had this huge showcase at the Montreal Comedy Festival. And that was, like, the place to be if you were a comedian. I was the it girl. There was all this buzz around me, and I was showcasing in front of every industry executive who could hire me for a job. And I ate shit. I bombed so badly. And it was horrible. Like, I thought my life was. I was like, this is it. It's over. Everything that I've worked so hard in the last five years doing standup, I had this crazy killer 10 minute set. And I just got up there and as soon as it didn't go my way because I was so green and new, I got so flustered and let the audience's reaction dictate my performance and I lost it. And I had a show the next night, but no one wanted to come back and see me because they're like, she's not ready. She's too green. She's not ready. This was whatever. And I sat in my hotel room and I just remember crying and feeling like, you know, this huge pity party. And then I got back to LA on a Sunday and my manager called me on a Monday and he said, there was one executive that wasn't at your show in Montreal. Grace Wu. She's at NBC. She still works at Peacock at NBC. She wasn't there and she wants to see you perform Tuesday night. Can you do a set tomorrow night? And I was like, yeah, sure, I'll get a set. I was like, okay. I had nothing to lose at this point. I already thought I ended my career, you know, before it began. And I went up and I did the same exact set. I crushed it. Like, it went perfectly. And I got my very first development deal. The next morning, Grace Wu called my manager and she's like, we're Gonna pay Chelsea $100,000 to develop a TV show about her. And so in 72 hours, like, what had been the worst bomb of my life in 72, just because I said yes, yes, yes. You know, like, I seized the moment and I just went for it. It turned around and I put that story in my book because it's just such a good lesson for all of us. Like, just when you think things have either fallen apart or you can't get back up, like, look around because there's rainbows everywhere. And you never know when you're gonna get an opportunity. Opportunity to make a first impression that you blew. You know what I mean? You never know when you're gonna get an opportunity for a second chance. So it's always, yes, like anything that scares me. Yes, yes, I'll do it. Yeah. So that was a great life lesson. It doesn't matter how bad something like, you know, you don't know what's gonna happen.

[Olivia March]

Yeah, Gorge.

[Adrianna March]

Well, I think we'll move on into our book Nook readers here.

[Alona March]

We read quite a lot.

[Adrianna March]

And you are a writer. You've written six books.

[Chelsea Handler]

Yes, seven books. Seven books. But yes, I think what I've written is seven books. And six of them were number One New York Times bestsellers.

[Olivia March]

But all of them are New York Times bestsellers.

[Chelsea Handler]

Yes, but not all number one. My very first book wasn't a number one.

[Adrianna March]

You had to grow.

[Chelsea Handler]

Yeah, I had to grow. I had to evolve.

[Adrianna March]

That's okay.

[Alona March]

You had to start somewhere.

[Chelsea Handler]

Yeah, whatever.

[Adrianna March]

Well, this is like the cozy part of the episode where we're talking about like what's happening just in our Kindles or what are we reading? What are you writing?

[Chelsea Handler]

Well, I'm not writing right now because, you know, once you write a book, I'm like, I need about a year off from writing. But I write my stand up, so that's like my writing. But what am I reading? I just read this book by Jen Hatmaker. Do you know Jen Hatmaker?

[Olivia March]

I know the name.

[Chelsea Handler]

It's called Awake. It's about this woman who was like kind of religious and she lives in this community and she wakes up, her husband of 27 years finds out he's talking to his girlfriend in the middle of the night. They have five kids. They got together when they were 18 and 19 years old. And she was like a big figure in like Christianity. I don't know her from that because I'm not into Christianity. But somebody gave me the book. The publisher sent it to me for probably and I just read it over the weekend and it's great.

[Alona March]

Really? Really?

[Chelsea Handler]

Yeah, it's just like a woman basically facing her worst fear. She's got five kids, she's got. She does have a career. But she didn't expect her husband to have an affair. He didn't wanna resolve the marriage. Like, he didn't wanna to work on it. So her whole life falls apart and it's just like her taking you through everything she did. Like, she didn't have one bill in her name. She didn't have any idea how much their mortgage was. She didn't have any idea how much their phone bill. Like she had to go through every. She had to change every name. She had to tell the kids. Like they had two adopted kids from I think Ethiopia. And she had to like basically tell them all that their father was moving. The next day, like they woke up and their whole life changed. So I love shit like that. I like memoirs, I like Truth and I like history a lot. But what are you guys reading?

[Olivia March]

We are big into romantasy. Like we read a lot of romance or a lot of fantasy. I love a memoir as well. Those are my big. That's one of my other big or thrillers. We're talking a lot about thrillers.

[Alona March]

I just finished a thriller and I like listening to thrillers. But like I've done Lucy Foley guest list and it's like a fun thriller, but I find that those suck me in a little too much and it kind of consumes my thoughts and I can't. I have to. She's like, take a pause on them. Well, I know. I love it so much, but I get too consumed by it. I put my headphones on, my noise canceling and I'm in that world. So I like to more read fun, romantasy romance little books.

[Chelsea Handler]

When I'm reading, I'm looking for information. I want like my brain to be filled up. Like, that's how I view reading. Like, I'm like, okay, what can I learn from this book? But I read a ton of books because I have guests on my podcast always that write books and so you want to read them. Like, I just read Malala's new book. That was really good. She's cute.

[Alona March]

She.

[Olivia March]

We had her on the show as well. She's a fab. She's friends with Alona because she loves movie sports. She's funny.

[Chelsea Handler]

I don't know why nobody thought she was going to be funny, but I did it.

[Alona March]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. That's what we realized is like, oh, this is just a girl.

[Adrianna March]

She's a girl.

[Alona March]

She just wants to hang out with the girls here to have a good time.

[Chelsea Handler]

But that story's so crazy, you know, imagine like leaving your home country and not being allowed back there because of something that was done to you. It's just crazy. And that Pakistan is like, their feelings towards her to this day are very mixed and dubious. Yeah.

[Olivia March]

And she's still helping though.

[Chelsea Handler]

Yeah.

[Olivia March]

She is like, it's unbelievable.

[Chelsea Handler]

Yeah. What she does for girls education, what.

[Olivia March]

She does for girls and girls in sports and education, it's like. And also I love the difference from her new book from her original one that was sort of people telling her who she was. And the new one where it's, you know, obviously finding a lot.

[Adrianna March]

It's beautifully written. I remember I was like just five pages in because she was coming on the podcast. I was like, I gotta read this. And I was like, oh, this is gonna be a great book. This is well written. And like, I've read many memoir, but it's not something that I gravitate towards. But I was like, this is sucking me.

[Olivia March]

This is the one.

[Chelsea Handler]

Have you guys ever read Circe by Madeline Miller?

[Olivia March]

Yes.

[Chelsea Handler]

That's a great book.

[Adrianna March]

Long.

[Olivia March]

Whoa.

[Chelsea Handler]

Long.

[Olivia March]

It's a long book.

[Chelsea Handler]

Oh, is it?

[Olivia March]

It's a Greek tragedy. It's so beautiful. It's beautiful. She writes sentences.

[Chelsea Handler]

Like. She writes sentences. You know what I love? I love when authors write a sentence and it makes. Makes you just put the book down.

[Olivia March]

Yeah.

[Chelsea Handler]

And you're like, holy. How did you write that sentence?

[Olivia March]

She also.

[Chelsea Handler]

She writes like that.

[Olivia March]

She writes like that. She also wrote the Achilles one. I've read that one, the Achilles song that everybody. Song of Achilles.

[Adrianna March]

One time I was working in a shoe store and someone came in with the Song of Achilles and I was like, are you liking it? Like, everyone loves it. She like sat down, she was like, I can't. I can't get through this. Started talking to me for 10 minutes about this book and how she hates it, but she feels pressure and that sticks out to me every time.

[Olivia March]

I.

[Adrianna March]

People love it. They love it. And she just needed, like, someone's ear just to talk about it and how much she hated it.

[Olivia March]

I preferred Circe because it was a woman's story, obviously, and it had so many other Greek tales tied into. You're like, oh, I've heard of that one. I know that. Oh, it's all tied here to the.

[Chelsea Handler]

I remember reading that. It was like the first book I read on Greek tragedies or Greek mythology, really. And I was like, I'm sorry, do Greeks think this is real? I was so confused about Greek mythology. I'm like, one of my nieces studied Greek mythology and I was like, so do Greeks believe that these people are real? She's like, no, this is an underworld and none of these people are real. But they're like figures, like historical figures. I'm like, well, historical figures implies that they were real.

[Olivia March]

They were real. Not the reason why the sun does whatever it does and stuff like that. Right. That one too is like, if you had to. If you were forced to read the Odyssey in any level of school, there's lots of tie ins from that. Like, she's the one that he sees on whatever journey. So it's a good one.

[Adrianna March]

I like to my youngest sister, like, Flex was. We had to read the Odyssey in high school and you had to annotate every chapter. And my whole class was struggling, but I got the book that they annotated. So each week I came in, look at my annotations. Don't flip through it.

[Chelsea Handler]

Oh, that's so funny. Right? That's nice.

[Alona March]

It really worked out for me.

[Chelsea Handler]

Thank you, guys.

[Olivia March]

Yeah.

[Alona March]

Will you.

[Olivia March]

I mean, you say you're taking a break from Writing. But when you do, what is your process if you're on tour?

[Chelsea Handler]

When I'm right on tour, like whenever I'm on tour. I've been doing sets at the Improv this week just to work out material. Like, I have the stories in my head that I wanna tell, but it's basically like the architecture of putting them together in a way that there's a beginning, middle and an end instead of just eight stories, you know, like, you wanna through line and you wanna have callbacks. So if I start my show, I tell this really ridiculous story about me falling out of a helicopter into the Hudson river and my dog was with me and literally I was with my boyfriend at the time and my dog jumped out, out of the helicopter after me to save me. Right. So, like, it's like, where do I position that story so that I can bring. Like, if I start with that story, I've gotta end with something about a dog. You know, like if I start with my love of microdosing lsd, then I wanna end or call back my microdosing of LSD or my dog ends up doing the lsd.

[Alona March]

Right, Right.

[Chelsea Handler]

It's all gotta be connected in a way where there is one. There's a bunch of like five stories within a giant story.

[Olivia March]

One big story.

[Chelsea Handler]

Yeah. So I look at it like that. And that's my style of standup. My style is, you know, like, very personal to me. But, you know, everybody's a little bit different with their kind of art and how they view it. Like, I would never call what I do art, but it is, it's creative.

[Olivia March]

Yeah.

[Alona March]

Thank you so much for stopping by our house, Chelsea. Get tickets for the High and Mighty tour@chelsea handler.com and check out her new special the Feeling on Netflix. Follow her advice podcast Dear Chelsea and follow her on everything at Chelsea Handler.

[Olivia March]

Thanks so much for coming over to.

[Adrianna March]

The House of Mar A Wave original.

[Alona March]

Be sure to watch and subscribe on YouTube and listen wherever you get your podcasts.

[Olivia March]

Plus, follow the show on social media ouseofmar for clips and behind the scenes content. We'll see you next time.

[Alona March]

See you next time.

[Olivia March]

Thanks for coming.

[Chelsea Handler]

You so good. It's so fun, you guys.