Podcast Summary: How Did This Get Made? - "Speed 2: Cruise Control" with Scott Aukerman (HDTGM Matinee)
Release Date: June 24, 2025

Introduction

In this episode of the award-winning comedy podcast "How Did This Get Made?", hosted by Paul Scheer, June Diane Raphael, and Jason Mantzoukas, the trio welcomes special guest Scott Aukerman, host of "Comedy Bang Bang." Together, they embark on a hilariously critical journey through the infamous sequel, "Speed 2: Cruise Control." The discussion delves deep into why this blockbuster flop became a staple of "so-bad-it's-good" cinema, unpacking its myriad flaws with sharp wit and comedic flair.

Overview of "Speed 2: Cruise Control"

"Speed 2: Cruise Control" attempts to replicate the high-octane success of its predecessor by shifting the setting from the bustling streets of Los Angeles to the serene confines of a luxury cruise ship. Keanu Reeves reprises his role as Officer Jack Traven, who, along with Sandra Bullock’s character, Annie Porter, finds their relationship tested amid a new wave of chaos orchestrated by the sinister Geiger, portrayed by Willem Dafoe.

Main Critique and Discussion

Plot and Storyline Flaws

Paul Scheer opens the critique by highlighting the fundamental missteps in the sequel’s premise:

"[02:00] Paul Scheer: Imagine Speed without the bus, without Keanu Reeves, without the tension and without the story."

The hosts unanimously agree that removing the central element of the unstoppable bus not only diluted the original's tension but also stripped away its core excitement. Scott Aukerman adds:

"[04:06] Scott Aukerman: This should be titled based upon a nightmare by Jan de Bont because he had a nightmare where a boat crashed into something."

This metaphor underscores the seemingly haphazard development of the sequel’s plot, suggesting that the movie feels more like a disjointed dream than a cohesive story.

Character Development and Chemistry

The transition of Sandra Bullock's role from a peripheral character driving the bus to the film's lead introduces significant character inconsistencies. Jason Mantzoukas points out:

"[05:19] Jason Mantzoukas: Wound up in the hospital."

This absurdity is further emphasized by the strained relationship dynamics between Bullock and Reynolds’ replacement, Jason Patrick, who inadequately embodies the heroic traits necessary for the role, leading to a palpable lack of chemistry.

Scott Aukerman criticizes the portrayal of relationships within the movie:

"[13:12] Scott Aukerman: I'm a computer psycho."

This line, among others, showcases the screenplay’s failure to develop believable and engaging character interactions, making it difficult for the audience to invest emotionally.

Plot Inconsistencies and Logical Flaws

The hosts meticulously dissect numerous plot holes and illogical sequences:

• The ease with which the antagonist, Geiger, infiltrates and sabotages the ship’s systems without raising immediate suspicion.
• The repetitive and unrealistic portrayal of how a luxurious cruise ship accommodates and responds to life-threatening crises.
• The film’s perplexing handling of time and action sequences, making it challenging to maintain suspense.

Jason Mantzoukas humorously highlights these issues:

"[24:27] Paul Scheer: Yes. So the guy's not excited. He wasn't like my dog. He was like, oh, I don't think."

This line reflects the disjointed and often nonsensical progression of events, further cementing the movie’s reputation as a poorly constructed sequel.

Technical and Directional Critiques

The discussion also touches upon the technical aspects of the film, criticizing:

• The overuse of slow-motion in action scenes, which detracts from the intended intensity.
• The inconsistent and non-existent security measures on the cruise ship, leading to implausible scenarios where the villain has unrestricted access.
• The exorbitant budget allocated to poorly executed action sequences, such as the $25 million finale scene, which fails to deliver engaging or coherent visuals.

Paul Scheer remarks:

"[43:35] Guest: And the final scene, it feels like an eternity."

This sentiment encapsulates the general consensus that the film’s grand finale lacks the necessary excitement and logical flow to serve as a satisfying conclusion.

Character Analysis

Willem Dafoe as Geiger

Willem Dafoe's portrayal of Geiger is dissected with both critique and dark humor. The villain’s motivations, stemming from a bizarre obsession with leeches after being wrongfully fired due to overexposure to copper, are deemed both convoluted and unconvincing. The hosts mock the superficial depth of his character, suggesting that his quirks do little to justify his antagonistic actions:

"[16:02] Paul Scheer: He got sued. Well, it was 1997..."

This backstory fails to provide a compelling reason for his vendetta, rendering his actions arbitrary and the character himself forgettable.

Sandra Bullock and Jason Patrick's Relationship

The forced rekindling of Sandra Bullock’s character with Jason Patrick is portrayed as awkward and unconvincing. The hosts critique the lack of genuine chemistry and the repetitive, unoriginal dialogue that hampers any potential for a believable romantic subplot:

"[33:52] Scott Aukerman: You okay?"
"[33:53] Jason Mantzoukas: Yeah, I'm fine."
"[34:05] Jason Mantzoukas: What?"

This exchange exemplifies the stilted and unnatural interactions that plague the movie, preventing any emotional engagement from the audience.

Notable Quotes with Timestamps

1. Paul Scheer [02:00]:
   "Imagine Speed without the bus, without Keanu Reeves, without the tension and without the story."

2. Scott Aukerman [04:06]:
   "This should be titled based upon a nightmare by Jan de Bont because he had a nightmare where a boat crashed into something."

3. Jason Mantzoukas [05:19]:
   "Wound up in the hospital."

4. Scott Aukerman [13:12]:
   "I'm a computer psycho."

5. Jason Mantzoukas [24:27]:
   "And the final scene just feels like an eternity."

Guest Contributions: Scott Aukerman's Insights

Scott Aukerman brings a fresh perspective to the discussion, drawing parallels between "Speed 2" and other notorious film sequels. His dry humor and critical eye highlight the flawed logic and character decisions that contribute to the movie's poor reception. Aukerman’s comments often serve to amplify the comedic elements of the critique, making the discussion both entertaining and insightful.

For instance, when addressing the villain's motivations:

"[16:46] Scott Aukerman: He got sick and they fired him. Hence the leeches."

This succinctly captures the absurdity of the antagonist’s backstory, illustrating the film’s failure to create a relatable and compelling villain.

Conclusion: Gathering of Opinions

Throughout the episode, the hosts and guest converge on a unanimous disdain for "Speed 2: Cruise Control." Despite the film’s attempt to mirror the success of its predecessor, it fails miserably due to its incoherent plot, lackluster character development, and numerous logical inconsistencies. However, Paul Scheer acknowledges that some viewers might find enjoyment in its sheer absurdity:

"[57:07] Paul Scheer: These are some second opinions. If you guys have an opinion about this show, log on to iTunes and rate our show."

In the end, the consensus remains that while "Speed 2" serves as a textbook example of a poorly executed sequel, it provides ample material for comedic analysis and entertaining critique, embodying the essence of what "How Did This Get Made?" celebrates.

Final Thoughts

For those unfamiliar with the podcast, this episode exemplifies "How Did This Get Made?" at its best—using humor and critical analysis to explore why certain films fail to resonate with audiences despite their high budgets and star-studded casts. If you enjoy dissecting cinematic flops with a comedic twist, this episode with Scott Aukerman is a must-listen.