The Avengers LIVE! w/ Tom Scharpling (Classic)

Summary

Podcast Summary: How Did This Get Made? – The Avengers LIVE! (w/ Tom Scharpling)

Podcast: How Did This Get Made?
Episode: The Avengers LIVE! (w/ Tom Scharpling)
Date: March 10, 2026
Hosts: Paul Scheer, June Diane Raphael, Jason Mantzoukas
Guest: Tom Scharpling
Location: Casper Podcast Lounge, New York City

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Episode Overview

This live episode takes on 1998's "The Avengers"—not the Marvel blockbuster, but the infamous adaptation of the British TV spy series, starring Ralph Fiennes, Uma Thurman, and Sean Connery. The hosts and guest Tom Scharpling dissect the film's nonsensical plot, baffling choices (bear costumes, anyone?), missing cuts, sexual chemistry (or lack thereof), and a general sense of "how did THIS get made?" The show features classic HDTGM banter, audience Q&A, and even a proposal!

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Main Discussion & Key Points

1. Intro: Setting the Scene

• [03:41] The hosts are back in NYC, podcasting from daybeds (“Casper daybeds”) in the cozy Casper Podcast Lounge.
• Lighthearted speculation about Casper mattresses being stuffed with “double ghosts” sets the silly, tangential tone.

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2. What Movie Are We Even Covering?

• [07:38] Paul: "The Avengers. It's a remake of the British TV show."
• [08:10] Much confusion over which "Avengers"—Jason & June joke about "Thor," "Ultron," etc.

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3. Background & The Source Material

• [09:13] Three female leads on the original show (Honor Blackman, Diana Rigg, and another).
• [09:27] Paul: Signs of a bad movie—if it can't make 90 minutes. "This one comes in at a tight, like, 84."
• [09:48] Jason: “If you had told me I had spent the last four hours watching it, I’d believe you.”

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4. The Plot: Or the Lack Thereof

• [10:18] Multiple hosts (“You missed nothing”) confirm the plot is incomprehensible—rewatch yields even less clarity.
• [11:00] Paul: "It feels like a Jenga tower…all the important structural pieces have been removed."
• [12:05] The villain’s (Sean Connery, Sir August) weather-controlling plot is revealed comically late and delivered with little sense.

Notable Quote:
“The weather is no longer in God’s hands, but in mine… You buy your weather from me.” – [13:23], Jason (as Connery)

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5. Villains, Costumes, and Bizarre Choices

• [13:39] Connery’s various outfits (including a “giant kilt”), plus bagpipes punctuating villainy.
• [16:19] The hosts speculate Connery is playing himself—“The closest to actual Sean Connery, the man.”
• [16:25] Connery’s entrance—grabbing women by the throat (“and a ton of sexual innuendo”), but ZERO sexual chemistry between leads.

Notable Quote:
“I honestly don’t think I’ve ever seen less—almost negative—sexual chemistry between two people…” – [16:52], June

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6. Casting What Ifs & Cut Footage

• [19:18] Original cast was to be Mel Gibson and Nicole Kidman; director could have been David Fincher.
• [23:10] The film was cut down from 120 minutes to 85 after a disastrous Spanish-language test screening, removing key exposition and further mangling the plot.

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7. Character & Plot Absurdities

• [24:22] Debates over Tuma Thurman—a cloned (or robot) version of Emma Peel. Clarity is unachievable.
• [25:10] “No one in this movie reacts to anything.” (Jason)
• [26:15] Secret service logic: suspect seen on video breaking in, so…make her a secret agent instead of arresting her.
• [27:22] Wonderland Weather, the villain’s “corporation,” is confoundingly underexplained.

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8. The Iconic Bear Costume Meeting

• [34:35] Bear costume scene is universally mocked. Why are security and villains dressed as Teddy bears?
• [36:04] June: “Once you're in that bear head, you're seeing, like, a tiny tiny bit of the wall.”

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9. The Movie's Empty, Clean World

• [43:01] Movie features an eerily empty London: “There are no extras… I love London, but I hate the people, the traffic and everything about it.” – [44:02], Jason imitating producer

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10. Sex Robots, Boot Foreplay, and Oddities

• [45:03] Paul reveals Tuma Thurman was meant to be a robot; studio changed it to “clone” in confusion.
• [31:58] The infamous boot scene is broken down: “I've never seen a foreplay scene where boots are going on, not off.” – June

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11. The Film’s Bizarre Logic & Artifacts

• [41:10] The opening "super-spy obstacle course" discussed; random potted plants as weapons.
• [48:29] Lackluster fight scenes, endless hedge mazes, and hot air balloon getaways.

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12. Audience Q&A & Best/Worst Moments

Key live moments with the audience:

• [51:48] Why is Invisible Jones fourth-billed? (Because he's played by the original "Avengers" actor.)
• [52:35] What are they actually avenging? Nobody knows.
• [56:02] Tea references are supercut—mocking the film's British stereotypes.
• [57:07] Audience claims to spot lines of cocaine in a Thurman scene (“maybe scientific molecules”).

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13. Notable Laughter and Callbacks

• [61:04] Is Connery’s sauna nudity a sexual power move? Is he waiting to show off to Uma Thurman?
• [62:08] Worry about reading newspapers in the sauna (“would get soggy so fast”).
• [63:58] Multiple audience members try their Sean Connery impressions.

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14. Running Gags & Meta Commentary

• Running debate over Uma Thurman and Ralph Fiennes’ heights.
• [70:40] “F/Marry/Kill” segment with Sean Connery (“Zardoz”), Dolph Lundgren, Roddy Piper.
• [76:19] Grace Jones’ Bond-theme knockoff “Strange Weather” closes the credits.
• Obsession over how few people appear in the film; the movie is compared to a dystopian wasteland.

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Outstanding Memorable Quotes

• “If this movie was a cup of tea, it would be coffee.” – [01:24], Paul Scheer
• “To me, the most fuckable character is the old lady. Alice.” – [17:06], Jason Mantzoukas
• “Why does security need to be in bear costumes?” – [35:44], Jason Mantzoukas
• “If you told me this was written by a weather-obsessed eleven-year-old… now I get it.” – [29:28], Jason Mantzoukas
• “No one in this movie reacts to anything.” – [25:30], Paul Scheer
• “I've never seen a foreplay scene where boots are going on, not off.” – [30:54], June Diane Raphael

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Important Segments & Timestamps

| Timestamp | Segment | |-----------|---------------------------------------------------------------------| | 03:41 | Hosts banter about Casper mattresses and weird podcast setups | | 07:38 | Introduction to "The Avengers" (1998), confusion about source | | 11:00 | First serious breakdown of the plot’s incoherence | | 12:15-14:20| Villain’s weather-controlling plan read verbatim, audience cracks up| | 19:18 | “What if” casting and lost Fincher version discussions | | 23:10 | Story of movie being cut after bad test screening | | 34:35 | Bear costume meeting scene discussed in detail | | 43:01 | On London's emptiness and the producer’s weird quote | | 45:03 | “Clone or robot?” debate about Tuma Thurman | | 51:48 | Audience Q&A begins, Invisible Jones question | | 56:02 | Supercut: Number of tea references in the film | | 61:04 | The sauna scene breakdown (“is he waiting naked for her?”) | | 70:40 | “F/Marry/Kill” segment with ridiculous options | | 73:45 | Reading customer “third opinion” Amazon reviews | | 76:19 | Grace Jones' “Strange Weather” Bond-esque theme song | | 67:35 | Proposal from an audience member during the Q&A |

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Notable Audience Interactions

• Multiple hilarious audience Q’s about the film’s logic
• [67:35] On-mic marriage proposal (she says yes!), celebrated by hosts

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Final Thoughts, Critiques, and Sign-Off

• [77:39] The hosts note the characters are bad spies, make stupid choices (splitting up, getting distracted by umbrellas).
• [78:55] Criticism of impractical hot-air balloon getaway.
• [80:05] Final plugs for the hosts’ TV work and podcasts.
• [76:19, 69:22] Shout-out to Blake Harris’s deep-dive articles on “How Did This Get Made” website.
• [73:00+] Amazon reviews—most positive accidentally for Marvel’s Avengers.
• [76:19] Ends by marveling at the Grace Jones theme (“Strange Weather”) as the ultimate Bond knockoff.

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Closing

The cast wraps with shout-outs, plugs, and gratitude to NYC fans—a wild, delirious breakdown of one of the most nonsensical "big" movies they've ever watched, with plenty of laughter, great quotes, and classic HDTGM energy.

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For anyone who hasn’t seen "The Avengers" (1998), this episode is the perfect antidote: it’s funnier, infinitely more coherent, and answers the critical question—how DID this get made?

Transcript

[Paul Scheer]

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[Jason Mantzoukas]

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[Paul Scheer]

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[Paul Scheer]

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[Jason Mantzoukas]

How did Swastnega grow a baby in his belly?

[Paul Scheer]

Rock a rhinestone vest while ripping Justin the Kelly or maybe see a burlesque show with Nate Crow and take a boba speed to hitting cruise control J Man big Paul in the beautiful June gonna take you from the goob all the way to the room Ran the games of Street Fighter hope to blow off steam just a sucker punch the odd life of Timothy Green Sharknado the birdemic how we staying alive they call it in the and he's on the line cranking 88 minutes cause they cool as ice cause the bad Jim Vonnie looking kind and nice Paul and June getting literal Jason is getting laid June is making sure all the monkey shots getting paid they judge a bunch of movies while they making the grade Here's a real question for you. How did this get made? Hello, people of Earth and hello people of New York. We are back in New York at the historic Casper Podcast Lounge, where podcasts have been broadcasting live for decades. So excited to be back here. We have a great movie in store. Not a great movie that was made, but a great movie to talk about because this one defies a lot of expectations, plot, story, characters, all of those things. But to talk about this movie effectively, I need to introduce my co host. Please welcome the to the stage, Jason Mantzoukas.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

What's up, jerks?

[Paul Scheer]

How are you, Jason?

[Jason Mantzoukas]

These are just beds.

[Paul Scheer]

We are on beds.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

These are just full blown beds for

[Paul Scheer]

the people listening at home. We are not in chairs. We are on two. Two day beds and not any day beds. Casper daybeds.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

And that's the thing I was talking. We're here at cpl, right, The Casper Podcast Lounge. You know, and right after CBGB's went under, I was like, this is still left. Thank God we're in the meat New York venue. CPL

[Paul Scheer]

Hogs and Heifers might have closed, but CPL DPL is still staying open.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Podcast Lounge.

[Paul Scheer]

The couches are so comfortable, we might fall asleep during the podcast.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

The couches are so comfortable because they are beds.

[Paul Scheer]

Please welcome my other co host, the beautiful Italian Jude, Diane Raphio.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Hi.

[Paul Scheer]

Welcome. June. Wow, June, how is this comfortable for you? Do you need.

[June Diane Raphael]

It's really comfortable.

[Paul Scheer]

All right, you're good? All right, great.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

I had been laboring.

[June Diane Raphael]

I have 15 pillows.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

I have been laboring under the belief that these mattresses were made of the corpses of Casper the friendly ghost.

[Paul Scheer]

They're so soft. They feel like ghosts are inside.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Like they are ghost corpses. Ooh. Sleeping on us like a lovely ghost corpse.

[Paul Scheer]

The only mattress company with dead ghosts inside.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Yep.

[Paul Scheer]

I guess all ghosts are dead.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

And they say up to 10 ghosts go into every single Casper mattress.

[Paul Scheer]

And they're not just, you know, it's. It's all different types of ghosts. Old ghosts.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Well, it's also a process. Making the mattresses is a process that kills a lot of people.

[June Diane Raphael]

Ghosts. Well, and that's like they're made of double ghosts. Ghosts that have been killed.

[Paul Scheer]

Yeah, they were ghosts and then they were killed. They were hunted.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

That became ghosts. And.

[June Diane Raphael]

But then the ghosts were killed. So now they're double ghosts.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Oh, yeah.

[Paul Scheer]

Spoiler alert. But you'll find out when you see Ghostbusters, a new one, that they're basically just catching ghosts for Casper mattresses. And I'm.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

I'm not sure if this is what Casper would like us to be putting out there. And in fact, I'm certain they don't. But every single one of their mattresses is haunted by a friendly ghost. By a friendly ghost.

[Paul Scheer]

Yeah. Which is a very big difference. You don't want an evil huge. I mean, yes, every now and then you will get an evil ghost in there. And that's one out of 100 mattresses ever.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Which is why the mattresses are so popular with the lonely, also known as people who listen to podcasts. So, welcome to the Kastner Podcast.

[Paul Scheer]

We have a very special guest joining us tonight. Our guest tonight is somebody we've been wanting to have on the show for quite some time. You know him as the host of the best show. Please welcome Tom Sharpling. Welcome, Tom. Welcome. Have a seat right there. Oh, all right. How are you, Tom?

[Tom Scharpling]

I'm good. Listen to that completely measured applause of me being here. They heard Tom, and then the only thing they wanted to hear after that was cruise, Ms. Middleditch. And then it's like, oh, no.

[Paul Scheer]

People are very excited to see you. Very excited. Let's get into this movie. The Avengers. It's a remake of the British TV show Thor.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Captain America.

[Paul Scheer]

No, Wrong. Wrong Avengers.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Wrong what?

[Paul Scheer]

Wrong Avengers.

[June Diane Raphael]

What is it?

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Ultron?

[June Diane Raphael]

What is it?

[Paul Scheer]

What is it?

[June Diane Raphael]

It's a remake.

[Paul Scheer]

It's. Yeah.

[June Diane Raphael]

What is it?

[Jason Mantzoukas]

And we're off.

[June Diane Raphael]

What is it? What is.

[Paul Scheer]

Is a remake of a British TV show called the Avengers.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Like an old. Like. Like. Like. Like back in the day, there were a lot of British TV shows about, like, the man from uncle the Saint, this one that were like James Bond for tv.

[June Diane Raphael]

Okay, this helps. So was this. Was this weather idea just an episode of the Avengers?

[Paul Scheer]

Wait, wait. Like, did they take an.

[June Diane Raphael]

Like, did they take an episode and make it into a feature?

[Paul Scheer]

No, they just took the characters and they updated them into this great plot about someone.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Do you want to sitting on this blanket? Is this part weird for you?

[June Diane Raphael]

This feels like a blanket in a hotel room that you need to remove immediately.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

This, like, needs.

[Paul Scheer]

But you don't want a black blanket.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Casper is great sponsor.

[Paul Scheer]

Casper's a great sponsor. And all their blankets are really clean.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Sure. But I'm going to come on all these mattresses. That's just a promise that I give all mattresses.

[Paul Scheer]

Yes. So it is a remake of a British TV show, and there were three female leads, I believe, throughout the run of the show, like Honor Blackman, Diana Rigg, and then someone else. Sorry, that I don't know that person's name.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

But that poor woman.

[Paul Scheer]

That poor, poor woman. But, yeah, so I always say, like, there's certain signs that we are going to be dealing with a bad movie. One of them is when the movie can't even make 90 minutes. This one comes in at a tight, like, 84. Under 90 minutes.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

And it's not a tight 84. No, it is. If you had told me I had spent the last four hours watching it, I would have been like, I think so.

[June Diane Raphael]

I had many moments where I thought, listen. Listen, June, listen harder. You must have missed something. And then I thought, go back. I have to. I texted you. I have to rewind and start at the beginning. I've missed something that is so important. And I was too lazy to do that. So I didn't.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

But I have an update. You missed nothing. Yeah. What you were wanting to get was at any point, somebody giving a coherent explanation of what was going on in the movie that you feel like you must have missed. That never happened.

[June Diane Raphael]

That never happened.

[Tom Scharpling]

I watched the movie twice.

[June Diane Raphael]

So scary.

[Tom Scharpling]

Because clearly, the first time I watched it, I had that exact same reaction. I was like, I must have fallen asleep during this. Apparently, it's been fading in and out. And I was like, I can't think of one thing that I just saw. So I watched it again. I was like, I think I understand it less now. The second time, like, it's becoming something you're not supposed to question.

[Paul Scheer]

I will say the movie feels like a Jenga tower that has been being played for many hours. So many missing pieces, but yet it's still like, oh, that's a tower. That is definitely a tower. But I don't understand how it's standing because all the important structural pieces have been removed.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

It would be like, oh, you know what? I had a dream last night. Here's what happened. So I was a spy. And then there was a woman. Oh. And she had a twin. And then we, like, it was raining.

[Paul Scheer]

Oh. And then it was snowing.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

And then the first James Bond was there. Like, it was. It was just like, none of it. And none of it progressed in any way that made sense.

[June Diane Raphael]

Well, I still could. I couldn't come up with even a theory at the end on why.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

So what do you think now that you've had time to percolate?

[June Diane Raphael]

I don't have much. I think.

[Paul Scheer]

Sir August Sean Connery.

[June Diane Raphael]

Sean Connery wanted to control the weather.

[Paul Scheer]

Yes.

[June Diane Raphael]

For.

[Paul Scheer]

Which is also a sign of a bad movie. Controlling the weather, I think.

[June Diane Raphael]

Okay. But here's what I can't land on for political purposes and just. Or for financial gain.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Financial gain.

[June Diane Raphael]

I genuinely don't know. Financial gain.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Yeah. I think it really comes in. In, like, the third act when he's basically like, you're gonna have to buy your weather from me. So he's gonna be like the Time Warner Cable of the weather where, like, depending on where you are, you have to get your weather from him.

[Paul Scheer]

Let's.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

And it's gonna suck. Customer service is awful.

[Paul Scheer]

Let's hear that. His diabolical plan as he's dressed in a giant kilt. Sean Connery dons many a costume in this movie.

[June Diane Raphael]

Yeah.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Guess what? Guess what? Doesn't fill me with, like, dread about a villain. Bagpipes. I'm like, oh, your nefarious plot is announced with bagpipes.

[Paul Scheer]

And again, this is late in the third act of the film where the major plan that would be kind of fueling the whole movie is revealed very late, within maybe 20 minutes of the end.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Oh, yeah. Now is the winter of your discontent. Above you, the weather is changing. The temperature is dropping. All the screens are the same shot. Why? Because the weather is no longer in God's hands, but in mine. A chain reaction that will paralyze and ultimately destroy the city. The countdown has already begun. This is why. Why do we have a dick shot?

[Paul Scheer]

Shut up. Close up of a COD piece.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Hundreds of millions will die. They'll drown, burn, freeze. You and your governments have no choice. You buy your weather from me, okay?

[Paul Scheer]

And that is the plan.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Oh, and by the way, you have until midnight.

[Paul Scheer]

Now, if you haven't seen what just happened, he takes his walking stick, hits a giant globe, and the globe seeming. The globe seemingly flies so far out of, like, it's almost like.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Like he was making a baseball or something.

[Tom Scharpling]

Not a 3D movie. Also, like, the kind of thing that would be the cheapest thing in a 3D movie. This was never in 3D.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Meanwhile, Jim Broadbent is sitting in front of a bank of surveillance cameras that are watching all of this. Each one of them is the same shot. So, like, they don't have, like, cameras all over giving, like, here, and here's what's over here, and here's what's over here. And it's, you know, it's like, oh, no. You've just got a bunch of screens showing the same shot.

[Paul Scheer]

Well, my issue was this. It seems to me that the UN was ready for this meeting. I was like, okay, first order business.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

That was the UN I don't know. I don't think that was the Un. I think that was something else.

[Paul Scheer]

Well, they all seem like they were dressed in different costumes.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Oh, yeah. They definitely represented different countries.

[Tom Scharpling]

Do you think there's a chance that Sean Connery just showed up dressed like that that day? And they who were just like, we need to change what everybody else is

[Jason Mantzoukas]

wearing because he's wearing a coat. I'll go one. I'll go one.

[Paul Scheer]

He will not take it off.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

I'll go one further and say he showed up dressed like that every day and that's the one day they let him do it.

[Paul Scheer]

Yeah. Well, I will then add to this and say that I feel like this character that Sean Connery plays is the closest to actual Sean Connery the man. Like, there is something about it. I'm like, yeah, take away the weather machine. I think this is Sean Connery. Yeah.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Yeah.

[Tom Scharpling]

Also just like, meets a woman by grabbing her by the throat.

[June Diane Raphael]

Why did he just do that?

[Paul Scheer]

He literally grabs. We'll show that scene in a little bit. He grabs a woman by the throat.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

He comes up from underneath and goes straight for a hand wrapped around throat. And then a ton of sexual innuendo.

[Paul Scheer]

None of it. Which works because the movie is so full of sexual innuendo that it's. It's. Then it becomes no innuendo. It's just.

[June Diane Raphael]

And yet it's. I've never. I honestly don't think I've ever seen less almost negative sexual chemistry between two people. Like they were being repelled from each other, from.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

That stands for every single person. Like, to me, the most fuckable character is the old lady. Alice. His father. Yes. Oh, father. You dirty little minx.

[Paul Scheer]

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[Jason Mantzoukas]

Switch to T Mobile and save up

[Paul Scheer]

to 20% versus Verizon by getting built in benefits they leave out.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Check the math@t mobile.com switch and now

[Paul Scheer]

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[Jason Mantzoukas]

Taxes and fees vary.

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Savings with three plus lines include third line free via monthly bill credits. Credit stop if you cancel any lines. Qualifying credit required. Well, yeah, obviously. Well, would it change it for you if the original casting as it was originally intended to be Mel Gibson as John Steed and Nicole Kidman. That was the original powerhouse of sexuality, I thought.

[June Diane Raphael]

I hate to say this, there's some such a height disparity between Uma and Rafe. Yes. The one scene where they kiss at the end, they're eye to eye and there's no way unless he's like standing on a hill that that would ever happen.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Do you feel like it is like uncomfortable when a woman is taller than a man, like and they are together?

[June Diane Raphael]

No, I don't.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Okay.

[June Diane Raphael]

I don't. I don't feel that way.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Okay.

[June Diane Raphael]

But I guess maybe I don't want to watch the Courtship of It.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Yeah.

[June Diane Raphael]

Because I don't. I know that to be, you know, true. I'm a tall woman. I'm probably just as tall as you.

[Paul Scheer]

Maybe.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Ok.

[June Diane Raphael]

But it was interesting to watch her because I actually felt when she was in regular civilian clothes and those Chanel suits, it felt weird. Like I only felt she was comfortable in the leather jumpsuit. Like that's when I felt she was at rest.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Totally. And from this movie, what I know is she brought him to set every day in a backpack.

[Paul Scheer]

Kind of like Luke carrying around Yoda in Empire Strikes Back.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

She rode on her back.

[June Diane Raphael]

I don't know the stats on his height. And I don't walk around feeling this. I really don't. I'm happy to accept a height disparity in a couple.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

You know, it's not for you.

[June Diane Raphael]

Oh, God, no.

[Paul Scheer]

I have been out at outdoor cafes with you and you'll poke at people in the street. Well, June will point at people.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

No roof.

[Paul Scheer]

We'll be at. We'll be out at outdoor French bistros. And June will point at people and go. If they're under five feet. Ew, ew, ew, ew. So it is. It is a concept.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

To be fair, a lot of those are children.

[Paul Scheer]

Yeah, she's done. You have no respect for children at all. Because it's not about a man being tall. It's about just height.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Do you watch Game of Thrones?

[June Diane Raphael]

No, but I know, I know.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

I was gonna say there's a whole. Sansa Stark, Jon Snow reunited this week, and she is towers over Kit Harrington. Like, Kit Harrington's like, oh, my God, you're back.

[Tom Scharpling]

So who was supposed to be in

[Paul Scheer]

the movie Originally, Mel Gibson and Nicole Kidman. Now, speaking of Game of Thrones, originally it was going to be directed by David Fincher and he wanted Tywin Lannister. Yes. And he wanted Tywin Lannister to be Charles Dance. Yeah. He to be James Deed. So that guy. So it could have been him.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Oh, can you imagine? He would have been great.

[Paul Scheer]

So. But no, no, no, no.

[Tom Scharpling]

If it was Mel Gibson, he probably. We would have just like teamed up with Sean Connery and then just like two shitty dudes deciding to like ruin Earth together.

[Paul Scheer]

I would, I think that Mel Gibson would have refused to have done the British accent. Like, I think, like, nah, we don't need to do that. I'm a British spy. Yeah, yeah, yeah, I'll be fine.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Oh, yeah, it's me. It's me, John Sneed.

[Paul Scheer]

Here's a free Stooges reference. Go. Let's go. Let's shoot this thing. So the whole movie, we reveal the plot at the end. But here's something that you guys should know. The movie was 120 minutes. That was cut down to 85. That's what happened. And the reason why is because they test screened this movie to an audience of Spanish speaking people.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

The intended audience, not in subtitles.

[Paul Scheer]

And the ratings of were very bad. And so the studio freaked out and they decided to make this cut of the movie, which cut out giant, giant, giant plot holes of this or filled in A lot of plot holes, obviously, because it's 85 minutes and every scene I'm like, well, wait, how did they get there? Why did they go there? It doesn't make any sense to me.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

How did they get away from there?

[June Diane Raphael]

Yeah, they get away from Sir August

[Jason Mantzoukas]

three times at the very least.

[Tom Scharpling]

One fourth of the movie consists of people waking up on a couch after having been knocked out during a fight and just someone tending to someone as they wake up on a couch.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

When.

[Paul Scheer]

And you have no idea how they got there and why they're not mad. Like, wait, you knocked me out in the snow. Now we're here on the couch, but I'm not gonna tell you that you knocked me out in the snow. We're just gonna keep it real subtle that only the audience knows this and I know this, but the characters never show up.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Are we to believe that Uma Thurman. Two Uma Thurman.

[Paul Scheer]

There's two.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

I'm real happy with that.

[Paul Scheer]

You should be.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Are we to believe that Tuma Thurman is the result of Sir August's cloning program from the. From years ago? Yes, but, like, we never really get into that. Right. Because once they discover it, she, Tooma Thurman is straight up murdered.

[Paul Scheer]

Did you, in your second viewing, did

[Tom Scharpling]

you understand again, I understood less of that, okay? And I just now understand that that was some clone.

[June Diane Raphael]

I'm still not get that at all.

[Paul Scheer]

I show a sheep with two heads at one point.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

I'm sorry, do you not remember the Invisible Man?

[Paul Scheer]

Oh, yes.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Giving us. Giving us an exposition with files.

[June Diane Raphael]

It almost seemed like Uma Thurman knew that Tuma Thurman was out there. She had no reaction.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

She sees the woman on the thing and is like, it looks like me, but it's not me. If I saw that, I would shit my pants.

[Paul Scheer]

But no one in this movie reacts to anything.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Okay, here's the other thing that happens when finally we are. We see Uma and Touma and Ralph Fiennes. Ralph Fiennes is like, I feel like I'm seeing double. And Uma Thurman goes, me too. You're not seeing yourself. You are the only person not seeing seeing double because you are not looking at yourself.

[June Diane Raphael]

But he also says that line about five times.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Yeah, yeah, everybody. That line is used constantly in an effort to allow Tuma Thurman to get away. She always gets away because people are like, now what? And she's like, walks right by the

[Paul Scheer]

big flaw of this movie. Well, I shouldn't. One of the Flaws. Is that the Secret Service? They go, okay, we have video footage of who they think is Uma Thurman breaking into this laboratory. And they go, you know what we need to do? We need to find her and then make her a secret agent. Good plan. Why not just arrest her right there.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

She is their chief suspect.

[Paul Scheer]

They have video footage of her doing it.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

And they're like, instead, we're gonna put you together as part of a super

[Tom Scharpling]

spy team of weirdos to find you.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

To find me, yeah.

[Paul Scheer]

Which they have no inkling even exists.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

They have no clues.

[Paul Scheer]

Yes.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

And she finds a clue. She goes to Kishan Connery's house, and it's like, I found a clue. It's a snow globe with an umbrella in it.

[Tom Scharpling]

Now let's go to the weather store.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Yep.

[Tom Scharpling]

And price out some weather.

[Paul Scheer]

And the thing about the weather store that was interesting is he. At the end, we heard the big plan. He's gonna control the weather. But it seems like he's already selling the weather.

[June Diane Raphael]

That's what I'm like, what is the corporation? What does the corporation Wonderland weather do?

[Paul Scheer]

I don't know. I also don't know why no one shot him when he's in front of the UN Cause he's like, at the end of that, he's like, he would hit that ball and then everyone would be like, okay, so we'll see you, I guess we'll talk about this and we'll get back to you.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

What's crazier is Jim Broadbent is watching this on tv. They're at, like, some sort of UN type meeting, as you've seen, but with all of these nation heads, blah, blah, blah. They're all like, rah, rah, rah. He gives his speech, he hits the ball. Okay, we cut back into Jim Broadbent's, like, bunker, and the old lady spy comes in, is like, here's his list of demands. Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa.

[Paul Scheer]

It's like when Obama does a State of the Union. Like, they pre. Like the minute it starts, I send it out so you can.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

That would be like if Obama was having, like, a meeting with someone who was like, these are our demands for this. And then, like a low level person walked into the head of the CIA and was like, yeah, that guy on tv. This is what he's talking about. That makes no sense. They would have killed that old lady instantly.

[Paul Scheer]

I felt like watching this movie felt like, if you ever have, like, a spouse or like, or a friend that's like, hey, let's go out with all my old high school friends and they go out and they just do inside jokes the entire night. And you sit there and you're like, yeah, I know you're never. I'm trying to. Cause it's like I feel like they felt like, yeah, we got it.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Yeah.

[Tom Scharpling]

It would be like that if you met your friend's old friends and they were all mannequins and he was filling in all of the. All the old jokes that they had together. And you realize I'm sitting with my friend and six mannequins and he's laughing at the stories they're telling.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Well, if you told me this was written by like a weather obsessed 11 year old, that's the first, I'd be like, oh, now I get it.

[June Diane Raphael]

I didn't understand though, when he kisses Mrs. When he kisses Uma Thurman at the end to really like to suss out if that's Uma or Tuma. I don't understand that moment because he's never kissed her before.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Right, right. But it makes his dick hard. So clone. Those are the lines. It makes his dick hard and he's like. So I knew it was you. Cause too much Thurman wouldn't be able to make his dick hard.

[June Diane Raphael]

It was dick for him.

[Paul Scheer]

But to me, that was a really mistimed moment. Again, structure wise. A big fight on a hot air balloon, a big death. They come face to face, the guy and the girl, even following the whole movie, they have a big triumphant kiss. They've saved the day. And then you look and it's like 25 minutes left in this movie. Yeah, like. Oh, oh, okay. Like. Like they wrote an end in the middle of the movie.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Yeah.

[Paul Scheer]

Which is bizarre. Arguably.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Yeah, 100%. Because what then happens is pointless.

[Paul Scheer]

Can. Can we hear some of their sexual innuendo stuff?

[June Diane Raphael]

This is the boots scene. I'm going to leave. I found this scene to be.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

So wait, because it turns you on so much.

[Paul Scheer]

No.

[June Diane Raphael]

First of all, I've never seen a foreplay scene where boots are going on, not off. And it was so strange and weird.

[Paul Scheer]

Would you like. You'd like to watch it again? All right, here we go. Boots going on. Uma Thurman in her red catsuit. You live alone? No, Mrs. Steed, since you ask.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Mrs. Steed lives in Wiltshire.

[Paul Scheer]

My mother. I had you down as a creature of Abbot. A bachelor's life.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

It's worked quite well until now.

[June Diane Raphael]

Don't tell me you never met the right girl. There's always the exception that proves the Rule.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Quite your exception. Exceptional in many things, but duty comes first. A time and place for everything.

[Paul Scheer]

Putting on the boot.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Now is definitely the time.

[June Diane Raphael]

I hate it. I hate it. I hate it, I hate it.

[Paul Scheer]

And place. He puts it on her. Oh. And they both have, like, a very pained look. It looks like he's, like, putting it in. Like it's a metaphor for, like.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

It's like he's trying to fuck her, but she's dry.

[Paul Scheer]

Yes. I was trying to figure out a way to say that, but yeah, that's exactly it.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Like, it's not. The boot is not going on easily.

[June Diane Raphael]

Well, because she's in. She's wearing a red leotard that I think is, like, footed.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Oh, yeah. She's wearing, like, a jumpsuit that has feet. Like footy pajamas.

[June Diane Raphael]

Yeah. So there's no, like, there's no way to snug that boot in.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

And I'm sure that boot is not meant to go over something that is that thick.

[June Diane Raphael]

No, those are thick. Thick, yes. Thick.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Keep going. It's not like stockings.

[June Diane Raphael]

They looked so. I hated it.

[Paul Scheer]

You got to. But you got to wear a stocking before you get a boot on to be safe.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Oh, yeah. No, you got. You got to. You can't just go jamming a boot on like Raw dog.

[June Diane Raphael]

By the way, you don't want to

[Paul Scheer]

rock out a boot without taking some protection for your feet thing.

[June Diane Raphael]

Earlier she mentioned she wanted a pair of boots.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

No, he gets them for her because they have the tracking device in them. And I think they. He. He. He sets it up so that he can keep tabs on her.

[June Diane Raphael]

This has never happened to me before. I swear. I had a hard time hearing this movie. Even now. I thought, listen to them.

[Paul Scheer]

Listen to them.

[June Diane Raphael]

I could not hear them.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

I kept saying. I kept writing, nobody on earth talks like this to each other.

[June Diane Raphael]

Thank you. Because I didn't get that at all, that these were. I thought he was just buying her a pair of boots.

[Tom Scharpling]

Don't you remember when they were at the clothing store having the sword fight at the beginning? That scene that started halfway through a rapier battle?

[June Diane Raphael]

Yes.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Oh, yeah. No, I've been like, just. I've been here for almost a week in New York, walking around, going to some stores, doing a little shopping, getting into sword fights, you know, while they prepare my bulletproof waistcoats.

[Paul Scheer]

And I just want to reiterate this. She's not a special agent of any kind. She's a scientist who is really good at sword fighting and fighting.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

And she's a scientist because her father wanted a son.

[Paul Scheer]

Oh, wow.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Which explains it all.

[Paul Scheer]

I guess it's time to talk about the bear costume. Costumes.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

This kid. Do you have a picture? We can just.

[Paul Scheer]

Oh, oh, I have a picture. I have the whole scene.

[June Diane Raphael]

Because I want to watch the whole scene. We're playing too many clips. Please, no, just a photo. Just a photo.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

When this happened. When this happened, I gasped.

[June Diane Raphael]

Believe it.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

I gasped. Could not believe this.

[Paul Scheer]

Sean Connery holds a meeting in a room full of brightly colored giant people in bear costumes.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

In gummy bears. Or the Grateful Dead dancing bears.

[Paul Scheer]

Yeah, Grateful Dead dancing bears. That's what they look like. And their giant, bulky costumes. And clearly, Sean Connery didn't do the first part of the scene where the head was on. He was like, I'm not gonna put on that dumb head. The body language changes almost entirely if you just look at. So for those at home, just picture. Yes, go ahead.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Why does security need to be in bear costumes? Like, they're protecting the anonymity of the guys at the table, which I kind of get. But why does security have to put something on that would directly prohibit them from doing their jobs?

[June Diane Raphael]

Jason, once you're in that bear head, you're seeing, like, a tiny, tiny bit of the wall.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

You can't pick up a gun.

[June Diane Raphael]

No, you are wearing.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

You have paws. You are security trayer.

[Paul Scheer]

Au contraire. These people we see after this meeting are functioning in their bear costumes.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Yes.

[Paul Scheer]

Literally working on, like, a construction site

[Jason Mantzoukas]

and, like, running around costume.

[Paul Scheer]

Like, when was the costume supposed to come off? It felt like that was just for this. They're like, all right, everyone, go back to work now. Go work on your science experiment. And then, you know, they're disposable, too, because Eddie Izzard just kind of takes his off and chucks it in the dumpster.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Sweet.

[Paul Scheer]

Eddie Izzard,

[Jason Mantzoukas]

I need you to chill out, bro. I need you to chill out, bro.

[Paul Scheer]

I'll just show you the opening of this, where Sean Connery is. Just listen and. Well, not listen, but just watch. And you see, I cannot listen. The dramatic body change here.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Welcome to Wonderland Weather here in our London headquarters. Now, allied with our colleagues from Brolly. Together, we will make history. You all know who I am, and I know all of you.

[Paul Scheer]

Now, he is gesticulating there as if he's on Barney. Like, it's waves and hook shuts, and

[Jason Mantzoukas]

everyone in the bear costume is like. Like, nodding along. Like, it's over.

[June Diane Raphael]

Do you think they were told, like, to get into character, or did they just, like, once they have that bear costume on.

[Paul Scheer]

Like, I think there was no way that they could take that bare head off. Because when he takes it off, it looks like. It looks like. Well, his head's so small in this costume. Where was it being held to?

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Why? Why do this? Why do this? Why do this? I don't know.

[Paul Scheer]

He knows who they are.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

There's nothing.

[Paul Scheer]

They don't know who each other are.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

There's nothing about the movie that is in other aspects, this playful. You know what I mean? Like, everybody could certainly wear masks for anonymity, but why big, giant, like furry bear costumes, Teddy bear style bear costumes.

[Paul Scheer]

He doesn't seem to be that kind of a cheeky character. Like.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Like this.

[Paul Scheer]

He doesn't seem to.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

He's not comfortable.

[Paul Scheer]

Jason is referring to.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

I'm still struggling with these beds, the

[Paul Scheer]

bed couches that we are on. Yeah, he doesn't seem to be cheeky in any way. He only seems to be intimidating in every way. There's so many better ways to hide everyone's anonymity.

[June Diane Raphael]

Yeah.

[Tom Scharpling]

And, you know, part of this whole thing ties into a larger thing that I honestly wasn't sure when this movie took place, whether it was in the 60s or in the 90s, except it was like in the 60s with like cool technology or in the 90s with stuff that have kind of seen already anyway, except for like.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Like there's elements of this that like share, that they share with like Kingsman, you know, like Kingsman also has like their dress, their secret agents as part of a side bit. Bupa that is well tailored and that's a part of how they operate and blah, blah, blah. But like, you know what's blowing, you know what will blow you away. This movie takes place in 2043.

[Paul Scheer]

Wow.

[Tom Scharpling]

So

[Paul Scheer]

I'm not an astronaut.

[June Diane Raphael]

I don't need an astronaut.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Audiences have spoken.

[Paul Scheer]

Project Hail Mary is an awe inspiring masterpiece.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

So I met an alien. If you've fallen out of love with going to the movies, this one will bring you back.

[Paul Scheer]

Ryan gosling in the first must see movie of 2026. Project Hail Mary, rated PG13, may be inappropriate for children under 13. Only in theaters March 20. How did this get made? Is sponsored by Sylvania with Sylvania seeing better while driving at night starts with you. Headlight bulbs dim over time and can lose up to 50ft of visibility before burnout. So don't wait. Upgrade your drive with Sylvania Automotive lights for better visibility on the road ahead. Sylvania's step by step video installation guides make it Easier than ever to take control of your nighttime clarity. All without a trip to the mechanic. So before the burnout darkens your day, upgrade to Sylvania and see better tonight. Everyone deserves to be connected. That's why T Mobile and US Cellular are joining forces.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Switch to T Mobile and save up

[Paul Scheer]

to 20% versus Verizon by getting built in benefits they leave out.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Check the math@t mobile.com Switch and now

[Paul Scheer]

T Mobile is in US cellular stores. Savings versus Comparable Verizon plans plus the cost of optional benefits, plan features and Texas and fees vary. Savings with three plus lines include third line free via monthly bill credits. Credit stop if you cancel any lines. Qualifying credit required.

[June Diane Raphael]

I hated the way this movie looked. I liked the opening sequence and then after that I just.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Wait, you liked the opening sequence when the, like, it was the observation obstacle course of what happens. You know what? We're gonna put you through a super spy obstacle course. One in which you're walking through the streets of a quaint English town and everybody's trying to kill you.

[Paul Scheer]

And they treat it like, oh, be careful. No, everyone tried to kill him except for the nuns.

[June Diane Raphael]

But it wasn't like, had he shot at them, those would be dead nuns.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Yeah, he didn't have a gun. He fist fights everybody.

[Paul Scheer]

Was the potted plant falling the first attack? Yes.

[June Diane Raphael]

Yes.

[Tom Scharpling]

Seems like it.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Yes.

[Paul Scheer]

Wow, that's a real. That's a real, like, gentle.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

He found a mark. He, like walked straight to a place and then had to be like, oops. Like, he must have, like, what's the plan? Like, well, if he walks anywhere near this, we're gonna drop this plant on him.

[Tom Scharpling]

That guy is up there. Yeah, all the time through every.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

And are there guys in all the upper windows with plants? Like, if he gets here and just

[Paul Scheer]

waiting like, oh, I wish they walked down the sidewalk because then I could do my plant drop.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Also. Also, what is that training you for? How many assassins are using potted plant as their weapon? Like, how is that part of it?

[June Diane Raphael]

You never know.

[Paul Scheer]

This is something I really want to show you guys. I'm not even going to explain explain it to you, but. Well, I will a little bit. Did you notice that there's nobody in this movie?

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Nobody in the movie? Yes.

[Paul Scheer]

Yes.

[Tom Scharpling]

Yeah.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

There is a grand total of, I think, 22 people that appear in this

[Paul Scheer]

movie if you are not a speaking character. So this is the producer that Avril found talking about. Oh, my gosh. Talking about why it's cool. Here we go.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Stuart Craig and Jeremiah Tizzica created London I would like to live in. You know, it's clean. Very, very clean. There are no billboards, no signs, no traffic. It's really nice. I mean, you could get from downtown London to the country in 20 minutes.

[Paul Scheer]

And then we see every scene in the movie where they're outdoors and there's no one. Not a person, not another car, just always empty. It has never, ever, ever shown people. London Bridge, empty streets, empty. People don't even react to the weather changing because there's no people.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

There are no. There are no reaction shots. There's not. There's no extras in this movie.

[Paul Scheer]

And by the way, that producer kind of being a dick, like, oh, that's the London I like to live in. Clean, no billboards.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

One in which a genocide has been committed against the people of London.

[Paul Scheer]

I love London, but I hate the people, the traffic and everything about it.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

I want to live in a dystopian wasteland with old cars. I would presume from this movie the only people that exist. Exist still on Earth are villains and the people that are fighting them. And that's it.

[Paul Scheer]

When Sean Connery captures Uma Thurman, it seems like he's like, you're not gonna remember. Like, I don't even understand what's going on here. So he has Tuma Thurman, which, as we understand her to be. She's a clone. So everything like Uma, but not.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

But she doesn't talk really. She doesn't have a personality that we know of. Sure. Oh, maybe on her downtime. She's a real cool. She's a real cool gal.

[Paul Scheer]

I'll blow your mind and give you the fact that we have been. That has been left out. She's a robot.

[Tom Scharpling]

What?

[Jason Mantzoukas]

I'm sorry, what now?

[Paul Scheer]

Yeah, she's a robot. And the. When they re edited the film, they thought that was too complex to introduce, so they just said she's a clone. So she's a robot.

[June Diane Raphael]

So in the first scenario where she's a robot, she just. They happen to create her in the.

[Paul Scheer]

Well, if we want to get into what the real plot of the movie is, it will kind of throw you for a loop.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Why. Why try and control the weather if you can build ud Uma Thurman's robots? Like, if that. If you can accomplish that, you're gonna be great. Like, you can just build robots, like, forever and work towards the singularity. Like, why. Why then be like, well, I wanna control the weather. My robot'll help.

[Paul Scheer]

I guess she just seems to do, like, hard labor. I mean, she doesn't seem to. Yeah, but yet you would imagine he could have sex with that robot. It's very ex machina, right?

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Wait, what?

[June Diane Raphael]

Pop, Pop.

[Paul Scheer]

No.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Why are you shaking your head? Why would you imagine that?

[Paul Scheer]

I would imagine that if you're gonna build a fully functioning robot, you're gonna make all the holes in the right spots.

[June Diane Raphael]

That is so many other reasons to build robots, but not a sexy robot.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

You could actually maybe like put the holes in some of the wrong spots just to like, just to see what happens.

[Paul Scheer]

But you're building a sexy robot. Like, don't you think that he. You, you guys saw her as totally sexless then you didn't think.

[June Diane Raphael]

I just don't think that you should assume if you're, if you're setting out to build a robot that you're gonna fuck that robot.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

That's like kind of gross. All right, all right. It's kind of gross, Paul, that you would like take it to such a sexual place. Like, I just am like, I'm not

[Tom Scharpling]

even sure that she was a robot. You might even just be putting your weirdness all over this thing. Just like, oh yeah, I read this thing.

[Paul Scheer]

She's a robot.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Oh yeah, she's a sex robot.

[Paul Scheer]

The. I have some of the plot of the original movie, which is the movie was to open with Uma Thurman breaking into the base. We see her breaking into the base and then they call John Steed to go get her. So you. On your honor, Tuma. But you don't know it's Tuma. You think it's Uma. And then they had all these flashbacks throughout the movie.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

What about Oprah? Yeah, I mean, it's a terrible David Letterman joke,

[Paul Scheer]

basically. I mean, the plot of the actual plot of the movie, I don't even. Seeing all the scenes that were cut out.

[June Diane Raphael]

It was much even do.

[Paul Scheer]

Yeah, it doesn't even do. Basically there was a lot more guessing if she had multiple personalities or if she was.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Oh, so you're saying the movie could have had more guessing?

[June Diane Raphael]

Well, you know what? I think there, I think there was a big misstep in. In Tomah actually replacing Uma at one point.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Uh huh.

[June Diane Raphael]

I feel like a real mix up opportunity. Yeah, that would have been great fun.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

You know, I agree. That would have been very fun.

[June Diane Raphael]

It would have been a great time.

[Paul Scheer]

Avril pointed out something to me that I thought was interesting to point out. Again, it's a very visual thing, but the fighting is very lackluster.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

The fighting is. This is some of the worst Stage, like, staged fight sequences I've ever seen.

[Paul Scheer]

It's as if I think what a real fight between Eddie Izzard and Uma Thurman would look like. You know, it. It's a little sloppy and, like, shaky. So I will show you this, just the fight scene here, because it really.

[June Diane Raphael]

You're making us watch a lot of this.

[Paul Scheer]

Sorry.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

This is the fight that takes place on wires.

[Paul Scheer]

Yeah. So he shakes wires, violently climbs, and then he falls. Sloppy. That's the coolest moment. Now he's spinning. She crawls back, and then. What is she gonna do? Shake, shake, shake, shake, shake, shake. That's the fight scene.

[June Diane Raphael]

I also have to say, if this thing, this orb, I don't even know what it is. I don't know what that thing is.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

What do you think it probably is?

[June Diane Raphael]

I think it's, like, the nucleus of this operation. I don't know what it is or what is it, but I know it's important. But if that's so important, like, those cables were not on properly.

[Paul Scheer]

Those cables shouldn't be rocketing out with a couple of hard shakes. Does anyone. Before we get to the audience, which. We'll do it just a second, but does anyone want to take a guess of what happened to Sean Connery at the end when he does get hit by the lightning bolt?

[Jason Mantzoukas]

And what happens to everybody who gets hit by lightning? They are carried into the sky by

[Paul Scheer]

lightning and sucked up into the clouds to then stop weather.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Yeah. Because that's how lightning works. Like a hand from the sky.

[Tom Scharpling]

Do you also think it's weird that Eddie Izzard is, like, this comedian and then they gave him, like, literally zero lines in the entire movie? Like, he was just to pantomime. It's like, we have you. And they also cast Shawn Ryder from Happy Mondays was also one of the goons, which I think is great.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

But they also, like, even, like, the lack of people in the movie goes all the way down the line. The idea that Sean Connery's, like, bad guys is just, like, kind of six guys that look like mods, you know what I mean, who are immediately terrible fighters. Like, his grand villain plan has, like, nobody to help him out, you know, except, like, a bunch of dummies and, like, a bath pipe.

[Paul Scheer]

When he's Cosbying Uma, the doorbell rings. He's like, oh, I have to go get it.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Yeah.

[Paul Scheer]

He lives in such a palatial mansion. The fact that he doesn't have a servant is so disturbing to me. It's like, you gotta get your Own door.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

And he's like, uh, I'm about to be the worst, but I guess I gotta go answer the door.

[Paul Scheer]

Yeah, just let them keep on knocking. Yeah, and how. And well, yeah, you wouldn't want to put your bedroom that close to the door anyway. I mean, that's just kind of an architectural problem. All right, well, I'm sure that you people out here have some questions that you need answered. Raise your hand and I'll come to you guys right now. And let's see here. All right, we'll come over here. All right, sir, what's your name and what is your question?

[Jason Mantzoukas]

My name is Jack and I'm wondering why Invisible Jones is it? Yeah, Invisible Jones gets 4th billion in

[Paul Scheer]

the credits at the end. Invisible Jones is the guy does the exposition jump. The reason I think why he gets it is because he was the original star of the Avengers TV show.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Oh, is it like Patrick McGoohan?

[Paul Scheer]

Is that who it is? Yes. Yeah. Mac McNee or Ben. Yeah. So that. Not really a funny answer.

[Tom Scharpling]

But you think he was so old and weird looking because he's so old that they just like made him make him invisible.

[Paul Scheer]

It's a real insult to him to be like, you were the male lead now. Diana Rigg was like, no, thank you. She passed wholesale on this movie. All right, sir, your. Your name and your question. Go ahead.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

My name is Jeff and my question is, what were they avenging?

[June Diane Raphael]

Great question, great question, Great question. It's so true. I kept on wondering, like, did the weather somehow like, destroy their lives? What are they avenging?

[Tom Scharpling]

It was Ralph Fine's parents were killed by a good movie is their chance to fight back.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

At a certain point in the beginning, Ralph finds is like, oh, we're whatever, fighting our enemies. If we even still have any enemies. And I was like, have they now? Are they so good at their jobs that they've just eradicated all bad guys? Nope. Here comes.

[Paul Scheer]

Well, no one else is left in the world. The world is empty.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

There is only 40 people left in Britain.

[Paul Scheer]

The, the, the. The tagline of this movie was extraordinary crimes against the people and the state must be avenged.

[Tom Scharpling]

No refunds. And they put that at the very end of it.

[June Diane Raphael]

But here's the weird thing too. We never saw the weather actually do any harm.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Not really.

[June Diane Raphael]

Not really.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

As far as I can see, snowy.

[Paul Scheer]

It was rainy.

[June Diane Raphael]

It was raining. And it snowed.

[Paul Scheer]

All right, here you go. Your name, your question. I'll hold the mic.

[June Diane Raphael]

Carmelina Lally. Did any.

[Paul Scheer]

You don't have to give Your full name.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

We're not, like, gonna check you Social Security number.

[June Diane Raphael]

1, 2, 3. Did anyone else think that the flower in the pot in the glass thing

[Jason Mantzoukas]

looked like a vagina?

[Paul Scheer]

Great question, Jason.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Here's the thing. I don't need your kind of perverted grossness coming to a family podcast, but, like, that pussy flower needed to get fucked. I mean, when he took the magnifying glass away, it was, like, red and wet.

[Paul Scheer]

It was essentially a more graphic Georgia o' Keeffe paint.

[Tom Scharpling]

Yes.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

And by the way, if any of us think Sean Connery is not fucking those flowers, in addition to Paul's sex robot theory, he 100% is.

[Paul Scheer]

Do you think he chokes the flowers like that choking thing? I still can't.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Those flowers are filthy.

[Paul Scheer]

Okay, sir, your name and your question.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Okay, my name's Matt.

[Paul Scheer]

And as an. Oh, I was gonna say you're great. You're an English person. This is gonna be great.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Oh, so hang on. Will you please explain this movie to us? And what the fuck is wrong with your people that you did this? That's what I was wondering. Do you guys. Is that what people think?

[Paul Scheer]

That we all drive around with cars that deliver tea?

[Jason Mantzoukas]

And you know what? If I had had this on just without the sound on, I would have considered it a documentary of your life because. Because you basically got. You guys have inbred yourselves out of existence. There's only like, 50 of you left driving around in old cars, being like, we've lost our minds.

[Paul Scheer]

Just so you guys understand how much time T is referenced in the movie, here's a quick super cut of the T moments.

[June Diane Raphael]

Time for tea.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Tea. Everyone goes home for tea after tea.

[Paul Scheer]

Is the pot warm?

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Always more tea. I did it all. Tea.

[Tom Scharpling]

Tea.

[June Diane Raphael]

What am I doing here having tea?

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Lucky if I didn't get the tea trolley.

[Paul Scheer]

It's a lot of tea. A lot of tea. Yes.

[Tom Scharpling]

Do you think that.

[Paul Scheer]

Yeah, go ahead.

[Tom Scharpling]

Her accent is so bad in the movie, it almost makes Ralph Fine seem like he's doing a British.

[Paul Scheer]

I agree with that. He doesn't seem like he's a real British.

[Tom Scharpling]

Halfway through, it starts to seem like he's like Frasier. He's like some, like, smart American guy you almost start to just assume is kind of British.

[Paul Scheer]

Also, do you think that he dumbed down his accent to help Uma Thurman? He's like, you know what? This is not gonna fly. So I'll make my accent kind of bad too.

[Tom Scharpling]

Just smear the whole.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Nobody will know if you can't come to me. I will have to come to you so that we at least sound similar enough that this is believable. Slash, this is not believable at all.

[Paul Scheer]

Yes, your name, your question name's Bill,

[Jason Mantzoukas]

but I need to bring up Uma with the lines of cocaine on the table that she has. That. If you don't notice that, that is totally fucked up. Where was that very first scene? This is her first scene in the movie. She. She totally has five lines of cocaine. Uma or Tuma? Uma. Tuma.

[June Diane Raphael]

Uma.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

But no, she totally has five lines of cocaine laid out on. Bro, I'm gonna need you to chill out on this cocaine. And he's. Oh, got me into all this cocaine, right? I mean, the movie is cocaine, right? Like, this guy is in a full body spot.

[Paul Scheer]

You could sit down, you could sit down. You could sit down

[Jason Mantzoukas]

and is nobody gonna do those? Like, is nobody gonna. Is nobody gonna do those lines? Like, can we get in there? Does anybody know where that coke is now?

[Paul Scheer]

What do you think it was? Prop coke or like real coke?

[Jason Mantzoukas]

What was that? Was that real coke?

[Paul Scheer]

We should do coke and figure it out.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

I'm gonna be honest, man. I couldn't focus on the rest of the movie. Cause I was like, nobody's doing that coke.

[Paul Scheer]

So she says coke in front of her, Tom. Is that what happened?

[Tom Scharpling]

It's in the very first, when she gets the chocolates delivered.

[Paul Scheer]

Okay.

[Tom Scharpling]

She's sitting at the kitchen counter and there's clearly just.

[June Diane Raphael]

But maybe it's like scientific, like molecules and stuff.

[Paul Scheer]

Hold on, hold on, wait. Scientific molecules?

[June Diane Raphael]

She's like testing out.

[Paul Scheer]

She what?

[June Diane Raphael]

I don't know. Is it. She's a scientist.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Why are you protecting her scientific molecules?

[June Diane Raphael]

Molecules, like atoms and stuff. Whatever.

[Paul Scheer]

Do you think that she's doing a science experiment?

[June Diane Raphael]

Maybe.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Wait a minute though. Do you think those are scientific molecules that she's snorting up her nose?

[June Diane Raphael]

Possibly.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Like to get into, like a really good. A really good mental state to think up new business ideas.

[June Diane Raphael]

Possibly.

[Paul Scheer]

I do want to talk to this gentleman here because he has a handwritten note on an iPad and I feel

[Jason Mantzoukas]

like also a three piece suit.

[Paul Scheer]

Yes. Are you dressed for the show? All right, he's dressed for the show. All right, your question. He's got a pen. All right, here we go. All right.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

We haven't talked about how good father is blind. She can fly a weather balloon completely blind. Fight completely blind. Get into a car completely blind. I think she's Daredevil.

[Paul Scheer]

That was the question he put on

[Jason Mantzoukas]

screen, not a question. Not a question. So your conjecture is that in the movie the Avengers, father is Daredevil.

[Paul Scheer]

I'll go one further and also say we assume she is blind. They've never said it.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

I assume she is likely not blind. What?

[June Diane Raphael]

I didn't think she was blind.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Yeah, I think she is not blind.

[Paul Scheer]

She is blind, but no one ever. There's no exposition to explain it in the bigger script, I don't know. But in the bigger script, they explain it. But that was a big plot point. They took out that she's blind.

[June Diane Raphael]

Are you blind in this movie and not in the. The other movie for two seconds?

[Paul Scheer]

All right, your name, your name and your question.

[June Diane Raphael]

My name is Corbett, and I was wondering if of Foreman. Corbett.

[Paul Scheer]

Corbett.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Corbin Burnson. Corbett.

[Paul Scheer]

He's got a question about Major League 3. Back to the minors. Go ahead.

[June Diane Raphael]

No, more like John Corbett.

[Paul Scheer]

Like Sex in the City.

[June Diane Raphael]

John Corbett.

[Paul Scheer]

Yes, I get it. I get it.

[June Diane Raphael]

Okay.

[Paul Scheer]

We got Corbett. All right, Corbett. Not Corbett.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

John Corbett.

[Paul Scheer]

Yes, we got it. We made a joke, and you corrected us. Now. Corbett. Yes, Corbett. Everyone at home taking notes, it's Corbett. All right, here we go.

[June Diane Raphael]

The scene where he's naked in the sauna, like, he's clearly expecting her to arrive. Everyone else seems totally surprised that she's arrived. But is he naked there waiting, like, for her?

[Paul Scheer]

That's the question. Is he.

[June Diane Raphael]

He wants her to find him naked.

[Paul Scheer]

So is he trying to show off his junk for her? Because she checks out his junk. She does one of those, like, huh.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Well, here's the thing. She finds him naked, and I think, yes, the intention is that he will be naked and see what she does. And what she does is she walks around so that she can see his dick. So I think that's them being like, oh, I'll take your challenge, and I'm gonna try and make you uncomfortable. And she had. There's, like, more sexual innuendo, like, lines there that are not good.

[Paul Scheer]

Also, when she walks into that gentleman's club. There are gentlemen. Women haven't been allowed in this club since 17th and. But the men react as if they've never seen a woman.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Yeah.

[Paul Scheer]

Like Godzilla, you know, like, which I think it would be, like, a little bit more subtle, by the way. That's the only reaction in the movie of any level. Let's see who has.

[June Diane Raphael]

It seems like that's where all the people are.

[Tom Scharpling]

And doesn't it seem like the most uncomfortable thing ever would be to be naked in a steam room reading a newspaper.

[June Diane Raphael]

Newspaper. Doesn't that seem like possibly Transferring it

[Jason Mantzoukas]

would get soggy so fast.

[Tom Scharpling]

Ink smeared all over your hands.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Oh, no, I can't imagine.

[Paul Scheer]

And he also brought his hat in there that he really cherished. But the hat would have gotten really bent out of shape.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Yeah. Oh, absolutely. You don't want to. And you don't want to get that. That. That hat real moist.

[Paul Scheer]

You know what it is, is those lockers don't have locks on them, so. And he's just nervous about leaving it.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Nervous about that hat. Losing that hat.

[Paul Scheer]

All right, your name, your question.

[June Diane Raphael]

My name is Megan. And my question is, if Sean Connery has the power of the weather at his disposal and he can use lightning, why does he send giant wasps to chase them down in the car? Giant.

[Paul Scheer]

What an amazing question.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Actually, giant bugs, like the remote control insect. That was like a real wild, wild west giant robot spider moment. I was like, what are we doing now? Why do they have this again? Okay, here's the thing. Sean Connery has now invented a functional badass robot that looks like Uma Thurman that he no doubt fucks, according to Paul Scheer, and an army of well armed flying insects that have, like, machine guns on them. He is so capable with only those two things. He needn't try and control the weather. That's not a part of it.

[June Diane Raphael]

Also, do you believe in global warming?

[Jason Mantzoukas]

What's that?

[June Diane Raphael]

Do you believe in global warming?

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Well, no, that's. No. No.

[Paul Scheer]

I just realized a question I should have been asking in the audience before, so I'm gonna do it with you for the first time. We have a couple more questions here, but in your best Sean Connery voice, say your name and then ask your question. And if you could do them both the Sean Connery voice, I'll take it.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

My name is Peter.

[June Diane Raphael]

Oh, my God.

[Paul Scheer]

Wow.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Take a bow. Take a bow, Peter. Take a bow. I just wanted to let June know

[Paul Scheer]

that both of them are 5 11,

[Jason Mantzoukas]

according to the Internet.

[June Diane Raphael]

Come on.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

And second in the sauna, he says you're doing.

[Paul Scheer]

You don't play by the rules.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

He invited her there and he's surprised that she broke in. I was just very confused.

[Paul Scheer]

Amazing. Amazing. You're going to get a free. I'll give you that free poster.

[June Diane Raphael]

Wow.

[Paul Scheer]

Well, June, you just got burned.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

How's that feel?

[June Diane Raphael]

I don't believe that. I think she's. I don't believe it. So I feel.

[Paul Scheer]

Somebody call Starley Klein. And let's do a follow to her Mystery show episode where she measures Jake Gyllenhaal. Let's get her out there with measuring tape for Ralph Fiennes.

[June Diane Raphael]

Uma Thurman is a very tall woman. She's probably 5 11. Sure. But he is not.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

You think he's lying upwards?

[June Diane Raphael]

Yes.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

And maybe she's lying down. Maybe she's like 6:2. But he's like, that is too tall.

[Tom Scharpling]

Do you think he got measured wearing the hat?

[June Diane Raphael]

Possibly.

[Paul Scheer]

All right, who has a good question? Really? If you have confidence in your question. All right, Sean Connery it up. Here we go. My name is Ulay. Great. Pretty good.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Good.

[Paul Scheer]

So the. The only time in the movie where we see the black widow Scarlett Johansson catsuit is on Touma. And all of a sudden at the

[Jason Mantzoukas]

end, Uma is wearing the catsuit.

[Paul Scheer]

How does she get it? Is she too? Or did they pillage the dead body of Tuma from the blame?

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Wait, is Tuma wearing a different catsuit, though?

[June Diane Raphael]

She's wearing a red one. At one point in the.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Wag your finger at me, young lady. No, I don't. I don't appreciate being scolded by girl in second row.

[Tom Scharpling]

Yeah.

[June Diane Raphael]

I don't know. Again, I think Uma, as the actress is most comfortable in a catsuit. And so maybe.

[Paul Scheer]

I mean, she looked good in Kill Bill. She's in kind of a catsuit too.

[June Diane Raphael]

She's great in a catsuit.

[Tom Scharpling]

Do you think Quentin Tarantino, when he saw her, like, fighting in this thing, was kind of like, we're gonna have to unlearn some stuff here before we start filming Kill Bill. Yeah. That's not the way you'll be swinging a sword in this movie.

[Paul Scheer]

Our final question here. Right. Is from somebody that you may recognize from one of our last New York episodes. We've been talking over here. So, sir, you can do your question right now. Thank you.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Last year at the tmnt Secret of the Ooze episode, uh oh, Adam Pally thought my big question was going to be proposing to my very embarrassed girlfriend who was sitting here next to me. And last year, after the show, she said, you should have done it. And I said, I know I should have. So. I'm sorry. I'm sorry that this is for a movie that you only could watch 36 minutes of.

[Paul Scheer]

Do it. Do it in a Sean Connery accent.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Oh, no. And I know you wish that they did. Pauly Shore's son in law tonight. Cause it's one of your favorite movies and would be perfect for the. How did this get made canon? So in the presence of three of our favorite people in the entire world, will you accept this mission. Amazing.

[Paul Scheer]

Congratulations. She said yes.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

That is great, Guys.

[June Diane Raphael]

Oh, my God.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

That's pretty good. Or true love day. True love day. True love day. And this is awkward and so exciting. But, like, you guys are gonna take a while to get married. Like, if you want to go out and hang out a little bit, I'm invited. Great. Thank you. Thank you. I will be there. That was amazing. Terrific.

[Paul Scheer]

Suck it, LA audiences. New York gets married.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah.

[Paul Scheer]

Okay, we are. We're wrapping up here, but before we do, I want to first tell you if you want to understand how this movie actually got made, our great friend and author Blake Harris has been doing these amazing how did this get made articles. Who's here tonight? Blake is here. He spoke to the director. The director.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Where are you, Blake?

[Paul Scheer]

Where are you, Blake? He's over here. All right, Blake is over here.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Give it up for Blake Harris.

[Paul Scheer]

You got. You got this director to talk about a lot of stuff. One of the things he does want to do is re edit this movie for free. But I don't know if he told you that, but this is so you have a very in depth story with him. You can read that on film.com, but give it up for Blake. He has amazing articles. If you haven't read them, they're great. If, if you have a question or a correction, an omission, an explanation, hope, whatever you want to call it, you can always leave it for us on our hotline. 619 Paul Ask.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Paul Ask.

[Paul Scheer]

No, 619-Paul-Ask. A s K. All right.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

But if you call 619paulask, it's a different line.

[Paul Scheer]

It has nothing to do with the show, Paul.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Butt talk.

[Paul Scheer]

It has nothing to do with this show.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Just talking butt, talking buns, talking cheeks.

[Paul Scheer]

We talk a lot about butts, but that's for something different. Very different project. You can hear that on the Gimlet network doing a whole show about asses. It's great. So you can do stuff like this. And this is on every one of our new mini episodes. Take a listen. This is what you get. What's up, jerks? It's Rob from South Bend, Indiana.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Buck Mary Kill.

[Paul Scheer]

Dolph Lundgren, Master of the Universe. Sean Connery.

[June Diane Raphael]

Inzardoz.

[Paul Scheer]

Or Rowdy. Roddy Piper and hell. Welcome to Frog Count. So he wants to know, F marry Kill Dolph Lundgren in Masters of the Universe. Roddy Piper in Hell comes the Frog Town. And what was the other one? Sean Connery and Zardoz. Anyone want to take a crack?

[June Diane Raphael]

I don't remember any of these movies. I don't.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

You like, you like?

[June Diane Raphael]

I black them out.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

You are like a mind wipe.

[Paul Scheer]

Happens after you're moments away from forgetting this movie. Like, I mean,

[Jason Mantzoukas]

I, I, I, I,

[Paul Scheer]

I, I think you gotta fuck Sean Connery from Zardoz. Cause he's down for that. I think you gotta kill Rowdy Roddy Piper because I don't want that. And you gotta marry Dolph Lundgren because he's true of heart and he's gonna make a good husband.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Yeah, I agree. That's a pretty good one. Except we know that Rowdy Roddy Piper is great at sex.

[Paul Scheer]

Tom, do you see any of those movies?

[Tom Scharpling]

Look, this is the Casper Podcast Lounge. This is not the SERTA thing. I'm not gonna talk about filth like that in the Casper Podcast Lounge.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

But no, to be fair, if you're gonna fuck any of those folks, you should do it on a Casper mattress.

[Paul Scheer]

All right, it is now time for second opinion. First is the worst.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Second is the best.

[Paul Scheer]

Where can I get opinions off my chest?

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Thank you, Amazon tea.

[Paul Scheer]

Oh, he had a teabag. Amazing. Amazing.

[Tom Scharpling]

That was great.

[Paul Scheer]

Brought his own prop.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

That was great. Turn it into a dub. Turn it into a dubstep song. Internet.

[Paul Scheer]

That was fantastic. Love the prop. All right, so There were only 25 reviews total for this movie. Okay, that equates. So basically There are like 10 to 12 pages of reviews. This is the smallest reviewed movie ever. Nick Kiley compiled these. And here we go. Five stars. Five stars. If you like subtle, dry humor, please rejoice. Now, this is the thing that is unfortunately bad about this movie. The majority of 5 star reviews are kind of like this. To be completely honest, I can't be objective here. I'm a big fan of the Marvel movie franchise and this is a worthy entry to that of kind canon. The action is wonderful. The effects are astounding. The humor is always on hand and more importantly, on point. And the end tag was just understated. Funny. I had to go out and try shawarma myself afterwards. 5 stars. A lot of them are Avenger reviews.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

No, wait. But did. Is that from someone who watched Avengers and then wrote the review in the wrong place? Watched this movie thinking it was Marvel's the Avengers?

[Paul Scheer]

No, because. Because they talk about shawarma. So that has to be Marvel's Avengers.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Oh. Oh, you're right.

[Tom Scharpling]

How great would it be if at the end of people sit for like 2 hours and 45 minutes through an Avengers movie, through the credits, and at the end It's Uma Thurman and Ralph Fiennes. Do like a one minute scene. You're like,

[Paul Scheer]

when we don't have a lot of five stars, we do something called third opinions. And third opinions are when we actually read the bad reviews. And this is from a customer. And it goes like this. I quit halfway through and I always finish movies. Unfortunately, I got suckered in by one, the great price point for a Blu Ray. Two, a great looking cover. Three, what I heard was a plot based on a cool old British TV spy program. And five, some artificially high reviews from people. Oh, sorry. Four from artificially high reviews from people who thought they were viewing the Marvel's Avengers movies. Save your dough. It ain't worth it. And mine's going straight to my library as a donation. Would be sad if this is the reason why Connery stopped making movies. One star.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Did this movie come out before or after League of Extraordinary Films?

[Paul Scheer]

This is right before then League followed it and then it was done.

[June Diane Raphael]

So he has a library of donated movies.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

I think he means donating it to, like his public library.

[June Diane Raphael]

Yeah, yeah, straight to the library for donating movies. Is that the only way libraries get movies?

[Paul Scheer]

No, I think they. They buy them.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

I think they get them.

[Tom Scharpling]

Imagine that library seeing him coming through the door again with another one of his shitty purchases. This is for everybody else.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Thank you so much. Thank you. Trash.

[Paul Scheer]

And finally, for the first time ever, a fourth opinion. This is a rare four star review. Didn't watch it. Can't wait to four stars by Mr. Salmon.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

That was this December.

[Paul Scheer]

That was Mr. Salmon.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

I wish that we could get a follow up from him. Finally watched it. Pre suicidal.

[Paul Scheer]

I want to end, but I also want to just talk about one thing that I don't think anyone realized. Because if you're like me, you shut this off immediately when the credits rolled. But they got Grace Jones to kind

[Jason Mantzoukas]

of do a gold finger like a Bond esque song.

[Paul Scheer]

Yeah. And it's just worth listening to just for a second or so to get the idea. It's like it's such a Bond ripoff.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Strange Weather.

[June Diane Raphael]

Strange Weather.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Strange Weather.

[Paul Scheer]

So that is if you want to hear the full Grace Jones version of Strange Weather, which we all definitely do. Anything we didn't cover anything. You guys want to bring up anything at all?

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Trying to think. I feel like there was stuff I wrote down that was just all this stuff where they would put chyrons up about, like who people were and like, oh, the Ministry. This is the Ministry. I was like, why that Always was unnecessary to me. I kept talking. I kept taking notes about how few people there were.

[June Diane Raphael]

I just want to say, I'm turning this over my head. I really have nothing against, you know, I don't see height. I don't see height.

[Paul Scheer]

Why you don't see height?

[June Diane Raphael]

I don't.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

I felt like they were bad spies. Like, when they get to. Every time they are forced with a decision in the field, they make the wrong decision. Like to enter a hedge maze. And then once they enter the hedge maze, they're like, we should split up. We should split up to get through this. Like, no. And then a man who's so good

[Paul Scheer]

at being aware of everything basically lets his self get distracted by an umbrella. He's like, oh, umbrella. Where'd he go? Where'd he go? The dumbest. There's a lot of mazes in this movie for no good reason, and that make no sense. Like when Uma Thurman keeps on running into the same room. I don't even understand how that works

[June Diane Raphael]

to do with the fact that there's no people left. And so he has no security other than, like, creating mazes around his compound.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Also, when the.

[Paul Scheer]

When.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

When father is trying to get away with Tuma Thurman, their mode of transport is a hot air balloon.

[Paul Scheer]

What?

[Jason Mantzoukas]

No. It's very slow. It's wildly noticeable, you know, where you don't blend in. Floating in the sky.

[June Diane Raphael]

Also, it's not a quick getaway, and the weather's terrible.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Yep.

[Paul Scheer]

Tom, any other. Anything else that we may have missed?

[Tom Scharpling]

That they do that thing where when Ralph Fiennes squares off with Sean Connery, it's like, oh, a little trick I learned in Istanbul. When I do, it's like, what is that? Like every British person, like, it's like Mr. Belvedere when he was always talking about just like, something I learned from the maharajah

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Belvedere, like, was a lot in this movie. There was a lot of Belvedere references.

[Tom Scharpling]

They should have just put him in it. That'd be cool.

[June Diane Raphael]

I loved Mr. Belvedere.

[Paul Scheer]

He would have made a good version of Jim Broadbent's character.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Jim. I felt so bad for Jim Broadbent's character. It always looked like they were putting tons of dandruff on his clothes, and it always looked like he was wearing. Wearing, like, a wet diaper. Well, that is it in a sexy way, though, Tom.

[Paul Scheer]

Obviously, people can listen to you. On one of my favorite podcasts, the Best show, and if they've never heard the best show, they could get into the best show by listening to the best show gems also on itunes. Both free podcasts.

[Tom Scharpling]

Yeah. Thebestshow.net all right,

[Paul Scheer]

well, we loved having you here. What do we want to plug here? You can visit us on our Facebook page. You can also visit us on hdtgm on Twitter June.

[June Diane Raphael]

I'd like to plug the second season of Grace and Frankie, which is streaming on Netflix and also Lady Dynamite on Netflix with Maria Bamford. It's amazing. And I'm in a couple episodes.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Yeah, I'm also a little bit in Lady Dynamite, and it just.

[June Diane Raphael]

I. I never saw you there.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Huh?

[June Diane Raphael]

I never saw you there.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

I asked to not be in any of your episodes, which is wonderful. Maria Bamford's new wonderful show that is on Netflix. And that's it.

[Paul Scheer]

I will plug a show that I co created called Filthy Preppy Teens on the full screen app. What's full screen app? It's like Hulu or Netflix, but younger. Check it out. It's.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

But younger.

[Paul Scheer]

Younger.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

It's for you kids.

[Paul Scheer]

Millennial Netflix. No, it's a super fun show for, like, in the world of, like, Gossip Girl and Pretty Little Liars and stuff like that. A big thank you to Vulture Fest. A big thank you to Blake Harris. A big thank you to Avril Halley. A big thank you to John Dolore. A big thank you, thank you to everybody here at Irowolf. July Diaz, Nick Kiley, Marisa Zeitz, Liana Waldron. Avril Halley. If I didn't say it, I said it now. Thank you all, New York. Thank you for coming. The merch table is open. Thank you, thank you, thank you, thank

[Jason Mantzoukas]

you, New York City

[June Diane Raphael]

At Charmin, we heard you shouldn't talk about going to the bathroom in public, so we decided to sing about it.

[Paul Scheer]

Light a candle, pour some wine, grab a roll. The soft kind for a Charmin Ultra soft smooth tear. Wavy edges for my rear. So let the softness caress your soul. Just relax. You're on a roll. Let her rip. Charmin Ultra Soft Smooth tear.

[June Diane Raphael]

Charmin Ultra soft Smooth tear has the same softness you love now with wavy edges that tear better than the leading one. Ply brand.

[Paul Scheer]

Enjoy the go with Charmin.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

A KFC tale in the pursuit of flavor. The greatest insult the Colonel ever suffered was being served a wrap that was just a snack by a friend. So he took two crispy tenders, lettuce, tomatoes, and pepper mayo and wrapped them in a soft tortilla. It wasn't a snack. It was a meal. He called it a twister and never called that friend again. The Colonel lived so we could Chicken the Twister. Now back at kfc. Classic or with bacon. Also try it spicy. It's finger licking good. Prices and participation may vary.