THOUGHTCRIME Ep. 132 — Gay Certification Program? Dad Chores? RIP Pizza Hut?

Summary

Podcast Summary: Human Events Daily with Jack Posobiec

Episode: Thoughtcrime 132 – Gay Certification Program? Dad Chores? RIP Pizza Hut?
Date: June 20, 2026
Host & Panel: Jack Posobiec ("A"), Tyler Bowyer ("B"), Russ ("D"), Producer/Co-hosts ("C", "E" as support voices)

Episode Overview

This episode of Thoughtcrime brings its panel’s signature blend of cultural commentary, political humor, and banter to a wide range of current topics—from the spectacle of UFC 250 at the White House, to California’s new “gay certification” for businesses, profound (and comedic) takes on modern gender roles, debates over dads' household chores, the decline of Pizza Hut, and viral Internet personalities. The episode is candid, irreverent, and altogether a fun, fast-paced ride through contemporary issues.

---

Main Topics & Key Moments

1. Opening Banter & UFC 250 at the White House

[00:35–11:00]

• The team reflects on the UFC 250 event, describing it as “family friendly” and filled with "positive energy." They praise the classiness and historical setting:

  “This was…at a level I think…any of the rallies that Trump has done. This was just phenomenal.” — Jack [04:44]

• Discussion of the event’s uniqueness: First UFC in history where all cards ended in a KO or TKO.
• Light teasing about ring girls’ apparel and the “classy” vibe (“didn’t feel uncomfortable watching with my teenage son” — Tyler [08:34])
• Jack notes the B1 Lancer bomber flyover: “The air itself was shaking” [10:30]
• Weather miraculously changed, adding to the event’s mystique: “the storm that split in two...” [10:40]

2. California's "Gay Certification Program"

[11:16–29:36]

• Chris Rufo’s reporting: California is allocating $900M in contracts to LGBT-owned companies. But how does one prove they’re LGBT?

  “California actually has regulations for how you can prove that you are gay.” — C [11:17]

• Acceptable proofs: letters from LGBT orgs, friends' attestations, being named LGBT in the press
• Panel jokes:

  “Three letters from personal contacts…So, like, we could have Resolute Media, Turning Point USA, and Turning Point Action…issue a letter declaring that Jack is gay.” — C [13:56]

• Mocking the absurdity with "ways to tell if someone’s gay": owning Lord of the Rings cuts, playing soccer, attending the WNBA, musical taste:

  “If a man loves the Golden Girls, Joan Crawford or the movie Summer Stock, then he’s gay.” — C quoting the famous “Mommy Dearest Gay Test” [24:08]

• Running gag: Tyler being teased for liking Lord of the Rings ("longest running Charlie joke" [21:09])
• Movie references (“I Now Pronounce You Chuck & Larry” [16:38]; “The 40-Year-Old Virgin” skit [17:14]) drive home the farce.
• Panel riffs on satire:

  “Irony itself is kind of gay.” — C [25:02]

3. Viral Movie “Obsession”: Gender Commentary

[29:36–49:02]

• “Obsession”—a micro-budget horror film—becomes a discussion point for modern gender roles, relationship dynamics, and toxic feminism.
• Jack gives a straightforward plot summary:

  “It’s a be-careful-what-you-wish-for kind of story…not bad, well done. I have nothing against it. It’s not, you know, not the first time I’ve seen that story.” — Jack [31:24]

• Tyler frames “Obsession” as an unintentional satire on toxic feminism:

  “It totally exposes women and how far they’ve destroyed America and destroyed men.” — Tyler [35:02]

• Debate ensues: Is the real problem toxic femininity, the male character’s “beta” behavior, or hookup culture?
• Panel plays and reacts to a pivotal, “scariest” movie scene [36:20]
• Quick-fire: Is the inciting movie “rape” due to magical wish/consent issues? The hosts mostly say no [41:23].
• Success of “Obsession” (profit, micro-budget) leads to a segue on film industry wage disputes and contract fairness [39:09–41:21].

4. Dad Chores, Gender Roles & Family Dynamics

[49:02–67:16]

• Cites a new report: “American dads rock—Fathers are doing more at home than ever,” up from 10 to 30 hours a week since the 1960s.
• Tyler highlights the nuance:

  “Having dads involved is a good thing, but having dads involved maybe in the wrong ways is a bad thing...” — Tyler [50:21]

• Jack and C tie rise of dad chores to women’s workforce participation. Propose that making it easier for women to work (via daycare) may reduce birth rates [52:24–54:30].
• Energetic debate on what housework is “dad” vs. “mom” territory:
  • Yard work, outdoor lighting: Dad
  • Kids & household cleaning: Mom
  • Dishes, laundry: Situational; argument whether dads doing dishes is “gay” [62:50]
• Playful, extended riffing on gardening, vacuuming, lightbulb changes, tulip-planting, and whether podcasting has justified more “feminine” chores.

  “Anything in the garage is for the dudes.” — D [61:37]

5. Breaking News: Arizona “Fake Electors” Charges Dropped

[67:16–69:48]

• Jack interrupts: reports the Arizona AG dropped charges against “fake electors,” including Tyler.

  “This has been…obviously, Tyler, you were one of the people who was on unfairly, unlawfully, and insanely charged…” — Jack [67:39]

6. The Decline (and Future) of Pizza Hut

[69:48–75:05]

• Panel mourns Pizza Hut’s decline:

  “Pizza Hut definitely went down a wrong path… they should be known as a gathering place.” — Jack [73:20]

• Discussion of nostalgia for the “family restaurant” Pizza Hut and theorizing about private equity's impact.
• Jack notes, Toys R Us is making a comeback, so hope remains for Pizza Hut [73:15]
• Family memories: "I wanted to be able to take my kids to Pizza Hut...sit down and enjoy that the same way we did before." — Jack [74:40]

7. Kumar: Accounting Influencer Viral Clips

[75:05–80:56]

• The team watches viral “Kumar” accounting influencer videos [75:28–78:54], laughs about social media fame and leans into imagining their own influencer pivot (“I am Tyler, and I know how to get people to vote” [79:43]).

• “He hit 1 million followers too, which is crazy.” — D [79:27]

• Jack: “Next time we're doing like a ballot drive…this is what we should be doing.” [79:12]

8. Final Banter: Brim Hat Debate & Outro

[80:56–end]

• Ongoing poll and panel bickering over the “straight brim vs. curved brim” hat fashion debate—shorthand for masculinity/femininity running through the episode.
• Running joke: “Straight brim is white boy summer energy.” — C [81:30]
• Closing jokes: “Thought crime is death.” — A [85:29]

---

Memorable Quotes

• “Irony itself is kind of gay.” — C [25:02]
• “If you listen to Moby…then you might be gay.” — B [22:20]
• “Having dads involved is a good thing, but having dads involved maybe in the wrong ways is a bad thing…” — Tyler [50:21]
• “Pizza Hut…should be known as a gathering place.” — Jack [73:20]
• "Anything in the garage is for the dudes." — D [61:37]
• “This is the longest running Charlie joke that we have going is Lord of the Rings.” — C [21:09]

---

Notable/Laugh-Out-Loud Moments

• “Three letters from personal contacts…issue a letter declaring that Jack is gay.” — [13:56]
• Debate over Star Wars costumes, “Obi Wan is bottom,” “Luke Skywalker is gay,” [27:42]
• Movie clip parody: “No homo” skit [25:04]; called “actually just…a meeting of the California state government” [26:40]
• Recurring Lord of the Rings “gayness” joke at Tyler’s expense [21:09–23:40]
• Rock garden vs. gardening: “Too many rocks in that rock garden and you’re gay.” — A [58:41]
• “Lamp string is a pretty innately feminine bisexual, though.” — C [61:07]
• Kumar, the accounting influencer, becomes the episode’s meme hero and lightning rod for panel aspiration [76:10–80:56]
• Jack freestyle rapping: “The name is Poso, in case you don’t know.” [85:00]

---

Section Timestamps

• Opening Banter & UFC 250: 00:35–11:00
• Gay Certification Program: 11:16–29:36
• Movie Obsession – Gender Dynamics: 29:36–49:02
• Dad Chores/Gender Roles: 49:02–67:16
• AZ Fake Electors Charges Dropped: 67:16–69:48
• RIP Pizza Hut & Brand Revival: 69:48–75:05
• Kumar: Accounting Influencer: 75:05–80:56
• Final Banter & Wrap-Up: 80:56–85:29

---

Closing Tone

Fast, irreverent, and brimful of inside jokes, Thoughtcrime Episode 132 hops from heavy topics (politics, law, gender) to gleeful pop-culture satire, ending on a note of viral goofiness and inside baseball about hats and podcasting. It’s an episode that rewards both longtime fans and newcomers seeking sharp, humorous cultural critique.

Transcript

[A]

From the age of Big Brother.

[B]

If they want to get you, they'll get you. DNSA specifically targets the communications of everyone.

[C]

They're collecting your communications. Michelle obama is a man.

[D]

Am I right, america?

[C]

Is he right?

[D]

Is he. Is he right?

[B]

Ah.

[A]

Okay, so that was aboard to this week's edition of Thought Crime. Third Crimes. Guys.

[C]

Oh, we're doing. We're doing great, Jack. We might be having a bit of spotty issues with you, but that's okay. But we figured we'd open with reflecting on the. The UFC. 250. It was a big triumph. Everyone loved it. It was one of the greatest things I've ever seen, and I certainly had the greatest UFC fight I've ever seen. I'm not.

[D]

It was. It was absolutely spectacular.

[C]

Yeah, I don't watch a ton of them, but my friend who does watch far more than me, he was telling me going in, this guy's gonna get rocked. He's gonna get. He's gonna get destroyed. They shouldn't have made this fight. And then the guy won, and then he gave a speech about how America's awesome. And then the band started playing the Stars and Stripes Forever, and that was a tremendous thing to watch. And we got extremely funny videos of someone making fun of Michelle Obama.

[D]

It's true. We. It was. Honestly, I have just recently started getting into the ufc, and this is. This was a way to go. Like, this was a way to. To watch an event. Just having the White House in the background, having the. The just epicness of the. The Oval Office, the inside of the White House, all the murals. Like, having that. A part of the walk up the. The.

[B]

The.

[D]

The band. The band was epic. That lady who was singing, like, somebody give her all of the money, because she was phenomenal. Like, it was awesome. It was awesome.

[C]

Tyler, did you watch it?

[B]

Oh, the whole thing from start to finish with my son. It was a bonding experience, start to finish.

[C]

It was like seven hours long.

[D]

I watched the whole thing as well.

[C]

I watched the last two fights start to finish.

[B]

We didn't miss a minute of it. And first. First ever UFC event where all of the cards ended in a KO or TKO ever in history, and that's what they wanted, and that was pretty exciting because it. It was looking pretty dicey in. In the last. In the last matchup, and it was. They did not disappoint. So two Arizona boys. Two Arizona boys falling down. Big wins.

[D]

Gishi had me on the seat. On the edge of my seat for. Because once he went down, I was like, I was kind of scared, but. But then he was able to ride it out till the end to the buzzer. And I was like, okay, all right, maybe we've got something. And he was able to. He was able to clean the clock, as you could say.

[C]

It was truly tremendous.

[B]

Now, look, I've been saying that Jack should do his hair like Sugar Sean for a while.

[E]

Yes.

[A]

I actually used to have hair like Sugar Sean, and my brother came late at night and chopped it all off one night. It's really sad, bro.

[D]

I'll do it.

[C]

That's. Wow, that's. That's kind of a dark betrayal. This is. This is new Jack lore.

[D]

I could actually. I could actually. I could actually rock the Sugar Sean hair.

[C]

I actually. What's Sugar shot?

[B]

It won't let you in the military or a Catholic church with hair like.

[D]

There it is. You see it on the. The B roll. It's the cornrows.

[C]

Oh, gosh. Oh, dear.

[A]

But not just.

[D]

I've actually braided my hair before, Hilariously enough.

[A]

I think he was going for, like, a red, white, and blue, but it came out like a pink and blue.

[D]

Like pink and blue. Yeah, it really did.

[A]

Because if you notice, it's like blue on the one side.

[D]

Yeah, it was good. It was. It was a. It was a fun, fun event. Hopefully we get more. I'm excited to see what else the White House has planned for the two.

[A]

So you're saying you guys had fun watching the event because. Some of us. Some of us had fun. Oh, what's this?

[D]

Yep.

[A]

What's this?

[D]

Jack was.

[A]

Some of us had fun attending the event.

[B]

That's right.

[D]

That's pretty badass.

[B]

So I'm not gonna lie. Just.

[A]

Just in terms of. Actually, my hats. I'll grab those in a second. Just in terms of the production value alone, I would put this up to any of the events that Turning Point has done, any of the rallies that Trump has done. This was. This was just at a level I think we're seeing, actually. And I was talking to somebody who's kind of in the space earlier this week on the commercial side, and we're just seeing promotions and public production take on a whole new realm of excellence. And everybody is just hitting better. This one, for obvious reasons. Look, it just takes the cake. I mean, it was just phenomenal. It was just phenomenal. It was all positive energy. There was no negative energy. It was something that you could say. It was family friendly in a sense. Right. Knowing that, you know, you're still watching fighters, but it wasn't Anything that was, I think, over the line was something that. Now, I. We didn't go with the kids, so I wrote Tanya, but we didn't go with the kids because they are at summer camp, believe it or not. They're at firefighter camp. And. And so we also planned. We actually also planned to sit down and watch the entire thing with them.

[D]

Oh, yeah. It's gonna be that. That's gonna be a good time. That's gonna be a good time.

[B]

Has anyone here ever been to Stafford, Arizona?

[C]

I have not.

[A]

Stafford? What's that?

[C]

Arizona.

[D]

There's no T. North or south?

[C]

Southeast. It's, like, in Grant. Is it Graham County, Green county, something like that?

[D]

I have not. No, I haven't. I've heard of it.

[C]

Arizona

[B]

program, it's forgotten. Mormonville, it's kind of on the north. So it's on the north eastern side of Tucson. You kind of have to go way out of your way to get up there, but there's not. Yeah, not very many people. There's a college called Eastern Arizona College that's up there, but, I mean, it is. It is a gritty place, and the fact that the. The world undisputed world champion is from Stafford, Arizona, is a pretty big deal.

[A]

So. Yeah, no, I've been around there. I've driven through like. Like, I've been to Bisbee. I've driven through, like. Like Benson.

[B]

Nope.

[A]

But it's like, this is, like, north, like. Yeah, closer. Close to the board. I've taken, like, the 10, like, all the way.

[B]

No, it's not close to the border. It's like, oh, my gosh.

[A]

Oh, my gosh. Instead of taking the 10, Benson is not close to the border.

[B]

It's north. You got to go, like, go out of your way on the other side of the mountains.

[A]

Yeah, this is in, like, we should go visit, as we used to say in the biz. This is like, east your bip. That is Easter, Biff.

[B]

It is. It is. The. Is the Dagestan of America now. Is.

[A]

Oh, the Dagesan.

[B]

Okay. Is the Dagestan of America. America needs its own Dagestan. That's where all the. The good UFC fighters train.

[A]

Well, and to Poria, right? Because if you look to Poria, he does this whole gimmick where he's from Spain, but if you look his. His family's actually from Abkhazia, and Abkhazia is like, as the crow flies, not really all that far. It's like, in the neighborhood of. Of Dagestan.

[B]

Yep.

[D]

So I. I want to I want to say something because I was getting some flack last week because I brought up the. The ring girls for the ufc because I was saying, like, it was actually pretty wholesome, that they were relatively clothed compared to other ring girls, and it looked great. Like, it worked in the aesthetic that was there, and I thought it was great. Even my. Even my fiance, Amanda, noticed and commented. She was like, I love.

[A]

She.

[D]

She loved the. The outfit. So I'm just saying I had a point.

[B]

Girls, the classy ring girls really, really dressed up the whole event. I'll be honest. It made it. It made it so I didn't feel uncomfortable watching with my teenage son. You know what I mean? The commentary, it was. It was. I think so. I think they proved that you can do it. You can do it in a classy way.

[D]

The whole event was classy. Like, that was the coolest thing is, like, the. The White House backdrop just was super classy, and they were able to just kind of keep that theme through everything.

[B]

Yep.

[D]

And even the fighters. Even the fighters giving their final speeches, minus maybe one, but. But for the most part, they were very classy. They were very classy.

[A]

What wasn't classy? Let me just say, like, being there.

[D]

I'm just saying it wasn't. Maybe it wasn't classy, but it was funny. Like, I have no problem with it, but, like, in the. In the. The spirit of everything, it was less classy than everything else.

[A]

Let me just say, having been there, you know, the camaraderie was great. You know, I had the opportunity to go out with, like, in, like, the free seats as well and just hang out with, like, regular UFC fans. And, like, Jon Stewart, I guess, was, like, losing his mind at me for saying that this was something that just average people liked. And he was like, stomach doesn't know what he's talking about. And there's a video of me. I ran into, like, Mike Benz and Bricksuit there, and he's like, pacific doesn't know what he's talking about. And I was like. I was literally there, bro. Like, I literally just went and I was talking to people about how much of a great event it was, how powerful that flyover was. And also the B1 Lancer, when. When the B1 bomber flew over with the afterburners going, then that thing, it shook the entire. You know, everybody remembered the jets, but that B1 bomber, when that flew over, it felt like the. The air itself was shaking, and, you know, we gotta throw out, as well, that whole thing. And I know Dana White's talked about this as well, that the storm that split in two because everybody that I went with was saying, it's going to rain, it's going to be pouring. You know, one, one of my buddies brought his galoshes, you know, and, and we were like, okay, we're just going to brave it out anyway. And the storm was coming in through West Virginia and then splits and somehow part of it goes north and part of it goes south.

[E]

And

[A]

event.

[D]

It was, it was a phenomenal event.

[A]

And somehow something happens.

[D]

Yeah, it was phenomenal.

[A]

Saying

[C]

it was good, good stuff. All right, should we dive into our first standard topic?

[D]

Yeah, let's do it.

[C]

All right. We have a few different options. We could. I, I think we have it further down here, but I think we should bump it up. Guys, we've got to talk about the state of California. We've got to talk about gay certification, the test. So the setup here, this is all coming thanks to Chris Ruffo, who has highlighted how California. They have. California law has required that they allocate a certain number of contracts, I believe $900 million worth of contracts to LGBT owned companies in the state. Now, in contrast to, say, women owned companies, which, well, traditionally you could kind of tell it's harder these days. Or even black owned companies, LGBT owned companies, that's like a pretty broad category. And how do you, can you visually tell in any way whether someone is gay or not? And so we've gone into California actually has regulations for how you can prove that you are gay. Jack, can you guess ways that you can prove that you're gay in California?

[A]

So I did actually hear some of this already, but. So it wouldn't necessarily be a guess, but I think they were including, like going to pride events. Like, that was a big one of them. Or, you know, I guess showing evidence of your dating history, I guess could be another one. Or like your, your relationship history, you know. So for Blake, for you, like, for example, for you, it'd be very easy.

[C]

Tisk. Tisk. Well, I mean, as we all know yet, so number one on it is watching,

[B]

it's you. You own all of the extended cuts of Lord of the Rings.

[C]

You're doing it again. You're doing it again. What are you. That's the easiest. Tisk. Tisk. No. So let's, we've got the article here. So gay certification program. I want to get the photo here. Let's see. You can get, if you have, you can get a letter. Basically, applicants can secure certification by providing a letter from an LGBT organization attesting to their gayness. You can have proof. You can use a newspaper that identifies you as lgbt. You can get up if you have three letters.

[D]

How does a newspaper identify you as gay?

[A]

I guess.

[C]

I mean, they might just. They might just call you gay.

[D]

Gay. Recipient three. Here is your gay newspaper.

[C]

I like this one. Three letters from personal contacts written, quote, uncompanied letterhead attesting to their homosexual orientation. So, like, we could have Resolute Media, Turning Point USA and Turning Point Action, because they're three legally distinct entities, each issue a letter declaring that Jack is gay. And even if he's married to a woman, those letters would be enough for him to qualify for.

[A]

No, but, but there's, There's. I've got, I've got other evidence, man. I've got. I've got kids.

[D]

He was just at the ufc. He's got, like, punching.

[A]

I was just at ufc. I, I. Then again. All right, I'm. I'm gonna come clean on this. I'm gonna come clean on this. You're right. Are you guys ready for this?

[D]

Yeah.

[A]

Ready for this. Now, while I have a lifelong, unblemished record of heterosexuality.

[B]

Okay.

[A]

I did once go to a Scissor Sisters Combat concert.

[C]

Ooh, that's rough.

[B]

That's rough.

[C]

Yeah. Play the shame bell. But that's part of what's amazing about this.

[A]

They're a great band. I'm sorry. They're a. And they, and they play great songs from artists like Elton John and David Bowie, Some of the straightest people who have ever walked the earth. What? Because David Bowie.

[D]

There needs to be a cricket.

[C]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. No, but that's part of what's so great about this.

[A]

You mentioned the love tonight. It's like the strange.

[C]

You mentioned the unblemished record of heterosexuality. But that's like, part of what's amazing about this is it seems to me like we're in this postmodern age of left wing identity. You know, they say, what's a woman? A person who identifies as a woman.

[D]

Yeah.

[C]

The only thing you can't do that for is race. You're not allowed to be transracial, but you can kind of be anything else. And they've done this with sexuality. You can be bisexual, you can be queer, you can be infinity different identities. So it strikes me that anyone who wants this money, they. As long as they're willing to bite the bullet and have three of those letters be sent in, or they can write a letter to the Arizona Republic and Be like, please call me gay in the paper. You can qualify for this. And even if you're literally married to a woman and, like, have kids with that woman and, like, live with her and all of that, they. How can they say you're not gay? You could just be like, I'm gay, but I'm married to a woman because my religious beliefs required me to be married to a woman or because I'm bisexual. Like, you could basically.

[D]

Yeah.

[C]

How can they call you a liar? I don't think California's internal logic of liberalism allows them to undercut this. And I think that's pretty fascinating.

[A]

Isn't there, like, an entire Adam Sandler movie about this from 20 years ago?

[C]

Yeah, I now pronounce, literally, Larry.

[A]

Oh, yeah, Chuck and Larry. Yeah, it's him and Kevin James. Right. So it's like, 20 years ago. This was literally the plot of, like, a very mainstream, you know, comedy. It was. It wasn't a great movie, but, you know, I remember seeing it. It was all right, and it is now, like, actual reality in the state of California.

[D]

Well, we actually have a clip from another movie that gives a good definition of what it means to be gay. If we wanted to play clip 33.

[A]

I'm not gay.

[D]

I'm just celibate, I think. I mean, that sounds good. I just want you to know that this is, like, the first conversation of, like, three. Three conversations that leads to you being gay. Like, there's this, and then in a year, it's like, oh, you know, I kind of get.

[B]

I want to get back out there,

[D]

but I think I like guys. And then there's the big, oh, I'm

[A]

a gay guy now. You're gay for saying that.

[D]

I'm gay for saying that.

[A]

You know how I know you're gay? How?

[D]

How do you know I'm gay?

[A]

Cause you macrame yourself a pair of jean shorts.

[D]

You know I know you're gay. You just told me you're not sleeping with women anymore.

[C]

You know how I know that you're gay?

[D]

How? Cause you're gay. And.

[B]

And you can tell who other gay people are.

[C]

You know how I know you're gay? How?

[A]

You like Coldplay. You know how I know that you're gay? How? You like the movie Made in Manhattan.

[D]

You know I know you're gay.

[B]

How?

[D]

I saw you make a spinach dip in a loaf of sourdough bread once.

[C]

You know how I know that you're gay?

[A]

Oh, you have a rainbow bumper sticker

[C]

on your card that says, I love it.

[A]

When balls are in my face.

[C]

That's gay.

[B]

Gay.

[C]

All of those things are pretty good.

[A]

Especially like a 3 year old virgin 20, 20 years ago.

[B]

I'm sorry that Andrew's not here right now because he's really into making sourdough lately.

[A]

That's true.

[C]

That's actually true. We need to ask Andrew if he can bring in a sourdough bread loaf next week without context and see what. And then the viewers would know. They would know. But I, I think we should go around. I think, bigger picture. If you could add one way to California's list that would qualify you for their gay thing, what would it be?

[D]

It would be playing soccer.

[C]

Playing soccer.

[D]

It would be playing or watching soccer.

[C]

Gay or playing soccer or watching soccer.

[D]

I. It's both gay watching soccer.

[C]

But although a lot of the players, when they start flopping on the ground

[B]

and female election is voyeuristic.

[A]

Anything voyeuristic is, you know, borderline.

[B]

A lot of lesbians on the, on the female soccer teams.

[C]

I think if I were going to pick one, I would probably say voluntarily attending a WNBA game.

[D]

Yeah, that's, that's, that's fair.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

Wait a minute. There, there, there is an asterisk with that, though.

[D]

Oh, is there?

[B]

Is there?

[C]

Oh, Tyler, tell us more about your asterisk on your WNBA fandom.

[B]

If Sophie Cunningham's on the floor, then it's. That's automatically straight.

[C]

Oh, okay. Is that kind of. Is that your way of saying just like. Is that kind of like if the. If the male underwear model is sufficiently hot, it's not gay for you to like him anymore? Is that, Is that how it is?

[B]

Oh, no. Sophie Cunningham has stood in the pocket. I won't go as far to say for conservatives, but I think she represents everything heterosexual within the wnba. So if she's on the floor, then it's okay to watch.

[D]

Fair.

[C]

Fair enough. All right. Tyler, how would you detect if someone's gay sufficient for California legal processes to be satisfied?

[B]

I already told you.

[C]

Yeah, but pick another one. Pick another one. We need more.

[B]

More than checking the library for Lord of the Rings?

[C]

Well, I mean, what else? I mean, I bet there's other ways to prove that you're gay. I mean, you. Come on, Tyler, you've got to know. You've got to be really familiar with this law.

[A]

Sure. The library.

[B]

That's all you have to do.

[C]

I love.

[A]

I'm sorry. I love how Tyler has kept this going for like, it's been like two years straight.

[C]

Tyler will die, and on his tombstone, it'll be like, Tyler Bowyer, whatever year you were born in2060. And then it'll say, like, is gay, by the way. And it'll say that on the bottom.

[D]

This is the, this is the longest

[B]

running Charlie joke that we have going is Lord of the Rings. Because Charlie was morally offended at me for. For saying that

[D]

he should be.

[C]

Lord of the Rings is super straight. Like, that's why you need another one.

[A]

California, you should never let it go.

[C]

They'll get all of these super straight Lord of the Rings fans coming in and taking their business, and they're going to crack down on it. So we need another reliable way.

[A]

Are you trying to tell me that all Lord of the Rings fans are straight?

[C]

Because that' I'm saying that, like, Lord of the Rings is straight enough to be associated with straightness.

[A]

You know that Lord of the Rings is the reason we have gender fluidity. Like the original gender fluid people were like the Elvish. And like the phrase other. The phrase otherkin literally comes from Lord of the Rings fans saying, saying, okay,

[C]

you could say that. But I'm pretty sure, I'm pretty sure that in Lord of the Rings universe lore, it's like, I think it might be literally impossible for an elf to be gay. There's like weird metaphysics that go into.

[A]

I mean, again, like, like, just because you have to judge things by their fruits, you have to judge things by their fruits.

[C]

Judge things by their fruits.

[A]

Like the fruits who are lots of gay. Like the fruits.

[B]

I have another one that's on par with Coldplay. If you listen to Moby as, then

[D]

you might be gay.

[C]

I don't even know a single moment.

[A]

Like, what about Uncle Play first came out? Would that be all right?

[C]

Oh, oh, Jack, are you feeling a little okay?

[D]

No, Everything Coldplay is okay.

[A]

A couple times also. A couple times when they first came out, they were like.

[C]

When they first came out, more like cold gay.

[A]

She's not gay.

[D]

Yeah, you two is definitely gay. Because my iPhone still will not let me delete the stupid album.

[C]

In Rainbows. Yeah, wait, it was called In Rainbows too.

[D]

Stuck on my. On my iPhone.

[C]

All right.

[B]

Yeah, you're right.

[A]

That's just gay.

[C]

Jack, what's your way of identifying of proving you're gay to the state of California?

[A]

Showing them my collection of Star wars costumes.

[C]

Ooh, the costumes more so. Or the books. What's gayer?

[A]

Costumes, obviously.

[C]

Okay. And oh, and by the way, audience, audience, you should give us some suggestions. What would you do to prove that you're gay to the state of California.

[D]

They're on board with the mommy dearest part too.

[E]

If.

[B]

If you. If you. If you like the music, the musical or the movie. Wicked Gay Facts.

[A]

Oh, yeah, that's super good. You know what's funny is we. We. My. My kids and I may bust on each other all the time about that because we'll see, like, an ad for it out somewhere, and I'll be like. I'll be like, hey, Jack, Jack, it's your favorite movie. And he goes, what, Daddy? And I'll point, and he's like, no. He's like, no, Daddy, too. But then they'll. They'll do it to me. They'll blow me up. If they see it first, then they'll say it. Or it's either that or, like, Taylor Swift or something. All right, so we use.

[C]

Got her list. She says, if a man loves the Golden Girls, Joan Crawford or the movie Summer Stock, then he's gay. I don't even know what the movie Summer Stock.

[A]

I don't even know what summer stock

[D]

is, movie or music.

[A]

Dylan. Ivy just says he loves Twilight.

[D]

That's a little gay. Dylan.

[C]

I love Twilight. Okay? You love Twilight also?

[D]

Yes.

[C]

Why?

[D]

Unashamed is right. If you like the new Snow White movie, it is in fact gay. That is in fact gay.

[C]

Or to Dylan in the chat, Twilight is very enjoyable because of how bad it is.

[B]

Very gay.

[C]

Does ironically enjoying something. Does that. Does that transgress it?

[B]

I feel like ironically enjoying something actually makes it more gay.

[A]

So it's pretty gay. Yeah. Yeah.

[C]

Irony itself is kind of gay.

[B]

Irony's gay.

[D]

All right, so Star wars costumes, let's go to clip. Because this is about a fun. A fun gay skit. Let's go to clip. 31.

[C]

Oh, okay.

[D]

Oh, 30. Sorry.

[C]

Sick hat, bro.

[D]

Damn, that looks attractive.

[C]

Oh, thanks, man.

[A]

No homo.

[B]

What?

[C]

No homo.

[D]

What's that?

[C]

You know, like, no homo. Like, I like your hat, but not

[D]

in a gateway

[B]

wall. Are we gay?

[C]

No, I'm saying I think the hat looks nice on you. I'm just not sexually attracted to you.

[B]

Okay?

[C]

It's not gay. I'm just.

[B]

I like your hat. Just.

[C]

I'm not sexually attracted to you. So every time you've ever complimented me, you've meant it sexually? No. But when you say no homo, you don't. Like when people say something that could come off as a little gay, they could say no homo

[A]

to make it more clear.

[B]

Like.

[E]

Yeah,

[C]

when you laugh, it lights me up. No homo. What?

[A]

You have a really cute smile. No homo.

[E]

Whoa.

[A]

What I love the way your clothes smell. You're in the shower, I sneak a sniff.

[E]

No homo. What?

[D]

What?

[B]

What?

[E]

What?

[A]

That's.

[C]

That's really gay. And you might be gay. Not that that's a problem. The sniffing is the problem.

[B]

Oh, yeah.

[A]

But I said no homo.

[C]

You can't just say anything. One say no homo curry. I just said if I say something that sounds a little gay, as long as I say no homo afterwards, it's fine. Yeah, but what. It's just kind of like. Kind of what? That's.

[B]

And I'm not.

[D]

I'm just.

[C]

It's. That's really gay, and he might be gay.

[E]

Huh.

[C]

So it's not widely known, but that's actually just the. That's video from a meeting of the California state government.

[D]

Yeah, exactly.

[C]

That's Gavin Newsom and a member of his cabinet discussing this new policy.

[D]

So the. Actually, Actually, the funny part about that is that the Ginger in the Hat is actually the director of Jack's favorite film right now, Obsession.

[C]

Wait, wait, hold on, hold on. We can't move on to that yet.

[A]

Wait, really.

[C]

Wait, hold on, hold on. We can't jump to that yet, because I'm just. It's just hitting me so. Sorry, I have to. I have to slam the brakes on this train here. This girl, this crazy gay train. Jack, what Star wars costumes do you have?

[A]

I don't have any.

[C]

You don't have any? But you were saying you would show them your Star wars costumes.

[A]

No, I was saying that that would be another thing. You could. You could use this to prove you're gay.

[C]

Okay, well, when you were thinking of

[B]

that fact, what costumes popped into your head? What's the gayest Star Wars?

[A]

Luke Skywalker.

[D]

That's fair.

[C]

Luke Skywalker is a gay costume.

[A]

Obi Wan Kenobi.

[C]

That's got to be like, bottom, first

[A]

of all, has come out and said that Luke Skywalker is gay.

[D]

That is true. He has done that.

[C]

Wait, who?

[D]

Mark Hamill did come out and Luke Skywalker is gay.

[C]

Oh, man, that's.

[D]

Yeah.

[A]

By the way, Darth Vader. Darth Vader. Darth Vader. Obvious dominatrix.

[C]

That adds super weird subtext to him wanting to go to Tashi Station to pick up those power converters.

[A]

Yeah, we know what he was talking about.

[C]

He has no idea what he's. What we're talking about.

[B]

That's.

[C]

That's too bad, Jack. It's too bad. One day you'll understand, I'm sure. Okay, now we can go on to obsession.

[A]

No, I'll I'll. I'll admit it. I'll admit it. Before I overcame my. My. My Star wars addiction. So in the intel community, people would wear their badges around their lanyards. You have to wear obviously your badge around your neck because you have to, like, prove that you're supposed to be in the spaces or whatever and have the right badge on. And so people used to have this whole thing where they would, like, wear their badge, you know, oh, I was at, you know, the embassy of Riyadh, or I was in Beijing or, you know, whatever your station was Middle east, whatever, whatever it might be. And I thought it would be funny to come up with a fake. Like a fake lanyard and then make that for my badge. So I had one that actually said Tashi Station all over. It just kept saying, like, repeated. Toshi Station. Tashi Station. And yeah, that's definitely the gayest thing I own.

[D]

Yeah.

[C]

The gayest thing you've ever owned.

[B]

Yes.

[D]

Okay, pretty gay.

[A]

Except for when I own you. Boom.

[B]

Ooh.

[D]

Ooh.

[C]

You may regret that one one day, Jack, but for now, now. Now we can go into session. We can finally go to Obsession.

[D]

That clip. That clip, that's the director of Obsession.

[B]

Oh, it was.

[D]

Yeah, like, I grew up funny.

[A]

Like, both of the guys are. This. Are him.

[D]

No, just the. Just the. The dude with the hat if we want to throw a picture of.

[A]

Yeah, put it back.

[D]

Curry Baker.

[A]

I wasn't paying attention.

[C]

Tisk.

[B]

Tisk.

[C]

No, but Jack. So you.

[D]

Yeah.

[C]

Oh, there we are.

[D]

Okay, so that's the two of them.

[C]

Wait, which. So they.

[D]

The one on the. The red is the director.

[C]

Okay, so he directed. This is like a YouTuber, right?

[D]

Yeah.

[C]

What's with all Big Picture? I've got to say, what's with. It seems like all the horror movies are made by comedy directors now because that guy from Key and Peele made all he made get out and all those. And now this guy.

[A]

His movies were crazy, but those were like all anti white. Like. Like kill all the white people movies. Like these are actually good.

[C]

Yeah. I mean, Obsession's also about. I think they kill a lot of white people in that movie too, don't they? There's a lot of. There's a lot of. There's a lot of blah, blah. But no, Jack, you were saying. Weren't you saying that Obsession is like.

[A]

No, no, no, no. That's. That's not my take on obsession at all. So this is the latest comic from some, you know, some comic that I've seen somewhere. And, you know, It's a now playing Obsession. I wish she'd let me out of the friend zone. And then all like the. The chicks are screaming. So has. Okay, so it's take. Obsession has taken on a life of its own in sort of like the commentariat sphere, the zoomer sphere. It's taken all the zoomers because I think for a lot of them, it's like the first horror movie, Zoomer. Actually, I, I thought it was a good movie. I didn't think that there was anything particularly special or unique about it. I think it's like just right up there with like, a number of other horror movies that have come out recently. It's, you know, it's kind of like a monkey paw situation. It's not really like a new concept in terms of what they did. And so it's, you know, this guy has kind of gotten friend zoned by this girl who's like, like kind of leading them on flirty, but, you know, doesn't. Can't. Can't get out of the friend zone. And then he goes to this, you know, this like, curio shop and finds. But instead of a monkey paw, this time, it's called the One Wish Willow. And he. If you break the One Wish willow and make your wish, then you, you know, that wish comes true immediately. And he said, I wish she falls in love with me. Right? That's the. That's the wish. And then it's just one of those, like, be careful what you wish for kind of stories. Again, not bad. Well done. You know, I have nothing against it. It's just like, it's not, you know, not the first time I've seen that story. And what's crazy, though, is the take on it that so many of, like, zoomer women and feminists and even millennial feminists and like, beta males have been saying is that they're calling it like a rape movie. They're saying that he violated her consent. They're saying that, like, he's this, this toxic, masculine, you know, evildoer. When it's like, guys, like, it's, It's. It's a mov. It's. It's all about toying with forces that you're not supposed to toy with. It's and. And don't take shortcuts in life. And Bishop Baron actually had an interesting review of it where he said, you know, you know, you have to go about things in a Christian way. You can't be dabbling with the demonic, which I've said about horror movies for years.

[C]

Well, hold on. Let's. I, I.

[A]

And so that's, that's sort of the take on it that, like, feminists are saying that, but then, like, other guys are saying, and, and I know Tyler's gonna hop in here, are saying that, like, actually, it's just sort of a way of depicting how, how crazy women get when they're in relationships sometimes.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

Hold on. So just to make sure everyone, like you said, it's a monkey paw movie. Guy breaks the stick to wish that this girl falls in love with him more than anyone in the world. Spoilers, by the way, it goes badly. I believe she makes his cat into a sandwich, and then she murders all of his friends. And then I think everyone dies except for her in the end. But, you know, big, big, giant mess. I don't know. I can't remember. I only kind of skimmed parts of the movie. But anyway, Tyler, you say that part was.

[A]

Or she, she duct taped his door so that he wouldn't be able to leave because the whole thing is that she becomes obsessed with him rather than actually being in love with him.

[C]

Yes, exactly. But. So Tyler, you say this is all about how men are trapped in the long house by the women. Explain yourself.

[B]

I think this, I think this entire movie was unintentionally, like, an expose on, on toxic feminism in America. And it is so funny to watch. Like, if you go and watch, like, with that mindset, the whole thing is hilarious. Like, the movie is hilarious. It totally exposes women and how far they've destroyed America and destroyed men. Like, I think I actually, I would love if some of the people that were responsible for producing this came out and actually said, like, yeah, actually, this was commentary on, you know, how terrible things are for men. I wouldn't be surprised at all. Because if you watch this, it's like every. There wasn't a scene. I was expecting a scene to have some kind of, like, lib undertones. Like, there really. There wasn't a scene. Actually, if you go in watching this entire thing, that it's like, oh, yeah, feminism's destroyed America. Feminism destroyed America. Women are insane. Like, they've gone way too far. Like, the entire thing is.

[C]

So to be clear here, Tyler, you're, you're arguing that a guy casts a spell on a girl, thereby killing himself and all of his friends, is about how women are the problem.

[A]

Well, I think, if I can, if I can understand correctly, Tyler, I think you're making. It's almost like a Straussian kind of claim, right?

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Where, where it's like, yes. That's not the surface level, you know, story that's going on, but when you go down one layer, it's like he. It's actually just giving himself permission to be able to say on screen and get obviously funding for it and all the rest a, you know, wow. Imagine if women were really like this. Wouldn't it be crazy if women were just like this when they were in relationships? Would it be wild if women actually acted this crazy and started going nuts for no reason and got mad at you for no reason whatsoever and had mood swings for no reason whatsoever?

[C]

So it's this scene. People have described the scene we're about to show as one of the scariest scenes in the movie. And it's where they realize everything has gone horribly wrong and he is trapped in a horror movie. Let's play clip 22.

[A]

Bear, I love you so, so, so, so, so much.

[B]

So good.

[C]

I don't think I could live without you. You love me more than anyone in the world?

[A]

Yes, More than anyone.

[C]

Icky.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

Does your dad really have cancer?

[B]

No.

[D]

No.

[A]

Oh, no, no.

[B]

What?

[C]

No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no.

[A]

Don't do that.

[C]

I thought we were having a nice day.

[A]

We are.

[E]

We are.

[D]

Why does it matter?

[C]

I thought we were having a nice day.

[A]

It's okay.

[E]

We are. We are.

[A]

Yeah. Because anyone who knows women who's ever been on a date with a woman knows that that's never something that women would do. That's not possibly something that women would do is have a, you know, put on a big scene in public like that and cause a commotion over literally nothing. That's. I mean, I've never ever experienced women doing that in my life.

[D]

Yeah. I don't know what you're talking about.

[A]

Russ. Russ who's like, how many days away from the wedding? Right?

[D]

Yeah. Like 200.

[A]

Yeah. Okay, well, Russ who's like hurtling towards his. His upcoming.

[C]

You need to find whatever. You need to find whatever restaurant in this town looks the most like that one.

[D]

Yeah.

[C]

Take her to Rustler's Roost. Just like ask her, do you love me more than anyone in the world? And then I don't ask some other follow up question. They're like, does this, you know, something like we need to like, maybe have a camera here. We can record on what really happens and we'll. We'll test whether there's Tyler's correct before we move on.

[D]

Been some pretty good.

[A]

There's been some really good memes that have come out where they just use that as the reaction. It's like. It's. You know, it's like when you. When. When you ask you. When you ask your girl if you can check her phone to see if she's been texting other guys, and she's like, no, no, no.

[C]

Before we move on, there's another. There's a completely separate. Very interesting topic involving obsession because this film was made for under a million dollars, basically no money.

[D]

It just crossed. It just today, it crossed the $300 million.

[C]

So it's made $300 million worldwide, $750,000 budget. It's outgrossing a Star wars film. It's getting a lot better pressed in a Star wars film. And speaking of things that I don't know it. Does it. This does sound like a total longhouse thing. Now, people who worked on this film have crawled out to basically complain, why wasn't I paid more money on this film now that it's making money. So, for example, the obsession art director has. She's called for industry reform because she said she was paid less than $7,000 to make the movie.

[D]

Which is also really funny because if you. When this movie first came out, one of the biggest things that I saw were all of these different, like, puff pieces talking about how this kid to get the actors and everything. A lot of it was just. He grabbed friends because that's. That's how he could make the movie. So it's really funny that all of a sudden it's like, oh, I'm not being compensated correctly.

[C]

It's. I mean, I think probably if you really make a ton of money, you could probably help everyone by, like, you find everyone who worked on the film and say, like, here's $25,000 or something. Something like that. But it is a little wild to me because all I said when I saw that she was complaining, I'm like, well, if the film had bombed and made no money, would you give the money you were paid back?

[D]

Correct.

[C]

And if not, why not? And the simple truth is, is, like, I get very annoyed when people. They negotiate a contract and then they're mad that the contract is bad after the fact.

[D]

That.

[C]

Yeah, well, too bad.

[A]

Very.

[D]

I also think it's. It's one of those things, you know, like parents and just. We talk about, like, you know, the latter, right?

[B]

You.

[D]

Everything. Everything has a reason for doing it. You get better, and then you, you know, you snowball that into the next thing. So it's like these.

[C]

She could have come out and said,

[D]

just jump to the.

[C]

She could Come out and been like, I am the art director on this massive movie that might win an Oscar. And instead she's. Yeah, person who will publicly kvetch about your film if after it's successful. It certainly seems very self destructive, at least.

[D]

True.

[A]

I think we do need to, we do need to go around the horn real quick and let's, let's just do, let's just do the yes or no on this. I'll start. Do we think that this is rape? No.

[C]

Not paying somebody or the movie?

[A]

The movie.

[C]

Okay.

[D]

No, I don't, I don't think so. I think it, it's a monkey's paw movie. That's literally the point. Right.

[C]

So I have not watched the full movie. I've seen scenes from. Kind of feels like it is to me because what happens is he like, first of all, he just straight up wishes on a magic spell, like, make this person love me more than anyone. But he basically realizes pretty quickly that she's not really doing this of her own will. Like she has kind of dissociative episodes. What is going on?

[A]

It's, it's, it, it's, it's after, it's after a time. Right. Like, it's like it's after period of time. So right at the beginning it's, he just thinks that she's coming onto him and she's not like as crazy. Right at the beginning she's literally just coming onto him and it's like kind of normal. And then it ratches up as it go goes along and then after it ratchets up, that's when he's like, okay, how do I break this curse?

[C]

Well, let's, let's, let's imagine this in a slightly different situation. Let's just imagine a traditional love potion like that that a witch would make and you can drink and they'll fall in love with you if they drink it. Would that, would that be rape if you were, if you put that in someone's drink?

[D]

Yeah, it's. No, I mean that's, I think that's a little bit different because I think it's still like again, we're talking about a spell that this kid doesn't know. What, what it's a, like what the effects actually are where.

[C]

And yes, the defense in the movie I think would be that he used the power almost on a lark, like wish on a star. And he didn't really expect it to do anything and he only realized it across the movie. But like, let's just say he does know it will Work.

[D]

Yeah.

[C]

It seems morally illicit to me to not to do that.

[D]

Yeah, I agree.

[A]

Well, it's obviously morally illicit. Like, that's. I mean, there's no question. Like, that's. I am saying it's morally illicit. I think it's. It's a different thing, right? It's. It's in the sense of you're. You're dabbling with the occult, you're dabbling in with the demonic in order to achieve something that you want through, you know, satanic means. And obviously that is illicit. It's a different. It's just a different type of immorality. That's what I'm talking about. Yeah. Tyler, what do you think? Were you coming down on this?

[B]

Look, I. I've made my. My position clear. I think this. This movie is a great undertone every young man should watch. It should be a fear that every young man has, but it also should. Should strain out women so that they start acting.

[C]

Tyler, your position is really that the girl in the movie is the perpetrator that she. She made. She made all the bad things happen.

[A]

Well, hold on. Because she assaulted the guy. Innocent, either. The girl's not completely innocent. It's not assault, but the girl's not completely innocent either, because she was leading him on. And while she was leading him on, she was hooking up with her best. His best friend behind his back.

[B]

Yeah, the. The big. Yeah, that was prior to the spell taking place because they said for years, like a year and a half or something. Right, right, Jack, Something like that. Yeah, it was like something like a year and a half. That was prior to the spell taking place. My point is, is that she is a victim of the circumstances or the. Whatever you want to call what the. The outside impacts that are having. Are just the same way that feminism has destroyed young women. And I wouldn't blame young women for the decisions that they make or them having such bad impact on young men, but the broader societal impacts of. Yeah. Neo feminism have really destroyed culture. And I think that that's what the.

[A]

Yeah, because there's. There's a take on. On this where it's like, this is ramp. This is when rampant hookup culture goes wrong. Right. Where she's. She's partaking in this hookup culture which Tyler is talking about, whereas the guy is. Is looking for, like, an actual. There's that scene at the beginning of the movie where he takes her home and she's like, hey, do you want to come in? Kind of. Kind of interested in the nice young

[B]

man that Worked with her. That was, like, clearly interested. He was super respectful. Just, like, wanted to take her out, like, enjoy just sitting with her and having drinks and go. Taking her out, like, would have, like, done anything to do the normal stuff for her, and she wasn't interested at all. And then come to find out, obviously, the spell happens, and, like, that's the whole thing. Right?

[A]

That's the Tyler she was. The one time that she was interested

[B]

in other guys all throughout.

[A]

The one time. Yeah, I was gonna say the one time that she acted like maybe she was gonna let him inside was when she had been drinking, so she was kind of, like, offering him because he drove her home. Right. Like a gentleman. Then she's like, so are you into me? And she's kind of, like, giving him those, like, googly eyes and kind of like they're at her door, you know, he just dropped her off, kind of saying, like, opening the door of, like, hey, come on inside. But because he knows that she's been drinking, he's like, you know what? I. I don't want to do this. Like, I don't want it to be, you know, just because some drunken hookup, like, I want to actually have a relationship. So she's engaging in this hookup culture, which kind of. Which leads to that. As opposed to him saying, like, I want a relationship, and she's just totally. Not even, you know, considering it, but will drag him on and lead him on anyway. I think what you're saying makes a lot of sense.

[C]

Well, it gets at the bigger thing, which is this guy should have learned that.

[D]

Yeah, I think.

[C]

I think girls don't, like. Don't like it when you're being a little. What is it, a beta simp or whatever?

[D]

Well, I also just think it's just. It's the guy not. Not realizing that he actually has self. Like, it's a. It's. There's a. There's a part of it that can be self worth where the guy needs to realize that he needs to move. Move on because she's not worth it.

[B]

That's.

[D]

That's, like.

[A]

Completely agree with that, too. Yeah, I completely agree with that, too. Like, that's. That's why it's a good. A good, you know, a good kind of, like, Rorschach test of. There's lots of different takes you can find on this. Like, nobody's really, like, innocent completely in this is kind of what I'm saying.

[D]

Yeah.

[A]

Like, Sarah. I think Sarah the friend is like, the one, like, just actually, like, good person who actually has a crush on the main guy. Like, she's, like, the only one who, like, tries to tell him the truth. And she tries. She's the one who tells him the truth. That, like, hey, like, they're hooking up and laughing at you, dude. Like, fair.

[C]

Oof. Brutal. But anyway, it seems like Betas have a hard time, which does lead us into. I think this is. Jack Tyler. You guys are gonna have a lot to say on this. So they all. I feel like we've repeatedly heard that it's like, we need to have more daycare, more help, all of that, to, like, make Americans have more kids. And so the Institute for Family Studies comes out, and this is the headline they chose. American dads rock. Fathers are doing more at home than ever. They run the numbers, and according to the author, Lyman stone, married dads versus the 1960s. About the year my dad and my mom were born, they were averaging under 10 hours of kind of household chores a week, and it's gone up to 30 hours a week. So they're doing three, three and a half times as much, basically today versus half 60 years ago. So the question that naturally comes to mind for me is, is this what's causing the fertility decline? Because it's made men seem more domesticated, and when they're domesticated, they don't want to have kids anymore. And by they, I mean the women. That's my thought crime. Jack Tyler.

[B]

Yeah, so it's a good. It's a good question. It's a legitimate question. Is, you know, obviously, if men are doing three times as much as they were doing just a couple just a generation ago, you know, what is that? What kind of impact, societal impact does that have on marriage? What kind of societal impact does that have on kids? You know, obviously, having dads involved is a good thing, but having dads involved maybe in the wrong ways is a bad thing, I think is the. Is the question. And so, you know, my. My immediately immediate take on this is, you know, should you have dads doing dad things with. With kids, or should you have dads doing mom things with kids? And obviously, I think the answer would be is have dads do dad things. I don't necessarily think it's such a bad thing to have dads doing more with their families, but certainly the things that they're having to do could potentially be a lot worse. And, you know, you're seeing a lot more of that, probably with broken homes and the divorce rate that's dramatically increased. You know, unwedded fathers, unwedded mothers, you know, so that's causing dads to have to spend up to 50% of their time by themselves trying to raise kids. And so they're having to do a lot more of that, which I'm sure impacts that number. Well, all things that are probably not great, you know, in the raising of children.

[A]

Well, and what isn't that if. Can we pull the chart back up? Because I want to just say this, this, these numbers are just for married couples. Right. So I'm sorry. Okay, so I think it, I think it is just married respondents, but no worse. Yeah, I think everything you said is smart and very insightful about where we are just as a society, even though it's. And I'm sure it's higher for both. I was just going to say, though, that wouldn't. The obvious, you know, the obvious initial reason for this be because women work more now than they did in 1960.

[D]

I was going to say the same thing as Jack.

[C]

One interesting thing also in this is they sum the numbers as well.

[A]

So could we also say that women working more is also leading to the fertility crisis?

[C]

I think it is for sure. And I think that's, I think that's kind of the bigger picture of what I was going for. One of the things that genuinely frustrates me is it's often put out that people will have more kids if we have like taxpayer funded daycare, like if we have public daycare, subsidize that, do all these things to make it easier to get daycare. And my thought has always been that's got to be the exact opposite of reality because what it's effectively a demand for is further entrench and enable the bigger factor that is making people have fewer kids, which is women being full time in the workforce, women being maximally committed to careers even after they marry, even after they have one or two kids. And if you further entrench that, you're further entrenching a norm where it's more common for them to say, I don't want to have kids at all, I want to have fewer kids because I'm getting more out of my career. Whereas I guess my thought crime would be if we totally defunded all daycare stuff that would probably drive up the birth rate because it would make more of them reach the calculation of, oh well, when I have a kid I should just quit my job and raise them at home. Because it's actually not really. The math doesn't even work out to have a job outside the home because daycare is expensive.

[D]

I think, I think women want, if they are going to have kids, they want to be able to be at home or at least be at home 90% of the time and be able to raise, raise the kid. I know like, and I just think that, you know, I think this is a, this is very much indicative of the fact that cost of living is higher. So a lot more families are two income households. And though, and so the, you know, the fertility rate is going down because these women don't want, don't want to have a kid and then leave.

[C]

It's really interesting though because in a lot of cases it is both of them working, but it is much more for this like self actualization purpose sometimes than pure economic necessity. Because again, go back to daycare. I know families, they've done this math where you have let's say two kids, if you live in the D.C. area, two kids in daycare who are, you know, below the age of six, that can literally be 3,000, $4,000 a month. Calculate that out times 12.

[A]

Okay.

[C]

You're spending 40, $50,000 a year on that. Now imagine what's the post tax take home pay. If you're doing a normal middle class job as, yeah like a teacher, secretary. You're basically means after you run all

[A]

the numbers the mom is making.

[D]

Yeah 50 to 70k and 2 kids or more. It's, it's not sustainable in the, the day and age that we are in

[A]

and I just want to throw out.

[D]

Yeah, go ahead real quick.

[A]

We're running a poll in the chat right now. So if you're watching, hop in the chat. Should I keep my brim straight or like Fred Durst or should I curve it like Tyler or. I will abide by whatever the chat says. Curve it for guys.

[D]

Curve it, curve it.

[A]

No, chat only. Chat only.

[D]

I unplug myself.

[C]

Tisk. Tisk.

[D]

Yeah, I know the autism is hitting.

[C]

So another thing I want to ask Jack and Tyler because again they probably have the strongest thoughts on this. If we're talking about the effect of dads doing chores at home, what's the hierarchy of acceptable dad chores versus maybe less good dad chores or are all of them good? Is it, is it, is it bad if dad is like, what would be good ones? Changing diapers? Is it bad if dad is changing? Is it, is it gay if dad's doing dusting in the house?

[A]

Dads are all dads can. Well, for me it's like, because like Tanya's, you know, not as vertically advantaged as I am. So, you know, I might, you know, get something that's, like, up high. Although, come to think about, I don't think she's ever actually asked me to, so I don't think so.

[B]

No.

[A]

I don't think I've ever dusted.

[D]

Amanda has ocd, so if I even try to start cleaning the house, like, she will literally kill me.

[C]

Yeah, I feel like that. I feel like that's the traditional.

[A]

That's totally something, too.

[C]

Women should clean.

[A]

It's like.

[C]

Because it's like they care more about

[D]

it if you move something out of

[A]

the way or something real quick. And then I'm gonna do it. And then. And then five minutes later, she's over there, like, scrubbing the same frying pan again. I'm like, what's the matter? So there was a spot, the ideal,

[C]

essentially, like, they feel ownership of it, and they're, like, mad that you're.

[A]

It's like, fine, then why should I do it at all, then?

[C]

And it's similar, like, you know what I'm saying? Takes the lead.

[A]

Tyler, you know what I'm talking about here.

[C]

And, like, the dad takes the lead in yard work because this is, like, a big.

[D]

Yes.

[C]

Rugged endeavor outside, but not.

[A]

But not gardening. Not gardening. Just yard work.

[C]

When does gardening become yard work or vice versa?

[A]

Oh, I mean, yard work is. Is. Is the lawn. It is like the. You know, like, the edging with, like, the weeder, the weed whacker. It is, you know, well, like, season also, like shuffling.

[C]

Planting a tree. Is that gardening or is that yard work?

[A]

A tree, because it is large, it's yard. Is yard work.

[D]

Yeah.

[C]

What about a bush, then?

[A]

A shrubbery, A bush, a bush or a shrubbery or another shrubbery just like it, on a level with a path running down the middle. Is. Is still yard work, but flowers is gardening.

[C]

Okay, what about laying, like, mulch? That's yard work, right?

[D]

Yeah.

[B]

Okay.

[D]

Yeah. I think. What do you. I think when you're talking about, like, gardening, which we do or it's.

[C]

We do. We do a big rock garden where

[A]

there's fertilizer every year.

[C]

Many aesthetically arranged rocks.

[D]

Well, that's where you do it together, you know?

[B]

Depends on how you rocks.

[D]

And then she kind of depends on

[A]

how far you go. Too many. Too many rocks in that rock garden. And you're gay.

[C]

Tyler, Tyler, Tyler. How many. Let's say a man debased himself and started planting tulips in his lawn. How many tulips is equal to one Lord of the Rings Movie In. In feminization. Gayness.

[A]

1.

[C]

One tulip is equal to like an entire Lord of the Rings movie.

[B]

You should plan notes, man.

[A]

Yeah, there's no such thing. It's like, it's. You're not like.

[B]

By the way, tulips will kill your dog.

[C]

So if you have nine. If you have nine tulips like in a row, that's like watching time out.

[B]

Time out. Bulbous flowers in your lawn or in your. Out in your garden. If the dogs dig them up and eat them, they'll die.

[C]

Okay, that's bad. But if you have a well trained dog, it shouldn't do that. Right?

[E]

That's.

[B]

That's the. That's a man. Man's response immediately when a wife asks you to plant tulips. Right there.

[C]

You know, it actually does occur to me now that my family had tulips growing up and we didn't have a dog and then we got a dog later and I don't know that we had tulips anymore. I didn't know that connection. That makes sense, though.

[D]

Yeah.

[E]

Well,

[C]

that's so. That's pretty strong. So if you planted nine and you

[B]

got out of planting tulips like a red fruit.

[A]

Trees are fine. Someone's saying Tyler trees in the chat. That's fine.

[C]

A man planting nine tulips in Tyler's view is equal to a guy watching all three Lord of the Rings movies, all three Hobbit movies and an entire season of Rings of Power. That's not nine tulips equals that.

[D]

Nine tulip sequels.

[C]

And that's. That's the Tyler math. It seems fair.

[A]

What.

[C]

What other.

[A]

What other chores for guys? What about. You're saying curved as well? No, it's only the chat. Only the jack. Only the chat can judge me. And in fact, generally Dylan Ivy says that straight brim is white boy summer energy. So just saying.

[C]

Here's one. Is it default dad or default moment to change a light bulb?

[D]

I feel like that's default dad.

[C]

Yeah, default dad.

[D]

It's more of the. And again, that goes to Jack's vertical vertically challenged.

[C]

What if the light bulb is in a lamp?

[A]

I mean, it doesn't matter.

[D]

I think that's a little bit of a nitpick.

[C]

Lamp string is a pretty innately feminine bisexual, though.

[A]

Bisexual.

[D]

It's a hybrid.

[A]

No lamps. Lamps are bisexual. Yeah, lamps are bisexual.

[C]

Okay. All right. What are the chores?

[A]

What about bugs?

[D]

Bugs are definitely a boy job.

[C]

Yeah, it's got to be a boy job.

[D]

Yeah.

[C]

What about vacuuming? But it's in the garage.

[D]

Well, the garage is outback is.

[C]

Garage is like, dude domain generally. Yeah, yeah.

[A]

If it's a shop vac, then that's dude. Yeah. Anything in the garage is for the dudes.

[C]

Yeah, anything. Anything in the garage is for the dudes. We can't think of a single exception.

[A]

If you have, like, boxes that need to be arranged and, like, decorations out there, then, like, that's. That's.

[E]

Yeah.

[D]

If there's, like a. If there is a set, organized, organizational, like, pattern that she has set up, then, yeah, you don't screw with that because you will get killed.

[C]

Okay.

[D]

Okay.

[C]

Vacuuming in a basement storage room,

[D]

I feel like that's also dude. I feel like that's a dude domain as well.

[A]

Is that. All right?

[E]

All right.

[A]

Is there. Is there anywhere in the house that the man should not vacuum? Dining room, like, dining room, living room. That's like.

[C]

That feels like core. That feels like core mom. Domain. Kitchen, Living room.

[A]

Those.

[C]

Those places, you know, sitting room.

[A]

Really?

[C]

Vacuum, study. How many different rooms can we name here? Your solar.

[A]

I was gonna say, like, your bedroom. Like, the basics.

[C]

Bedroom, Bathroom.

[A]

Basics. Office. You know, I. I'll. One thing we are. We are teaching the kids. Okay, well, what about dishes? We should go back to dishes. Like, that's. That's a basic.

[D]

Okay, so I like doing dishes. That's a weird take because I will literally put. I. No, I'm not. Yeah. Okay. Application for a podcast in, and I just kind of zone out.

[C]

So that does strike me as a factor. Does. Does podcasting. Does the ability to listen to podcasts easily now make all household chores slightly more defensible because you can use them as a Zen.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

Process.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

For me, it's either podcast or audiobook.

[D]

Yeah.

[A]

All day long.

[D]

Yeah. Especially if you're just Bet. If you're just trying to, like, like, get rid of stuff and get Noah's ask. Go through stuff.

[C]

Clean the dishes while your girl takes the trash out. Russ.

[D]

Oh, my gosh. No, I take the trash out. Trash is a boy job.

[A]

Women.

[D]

Women.

[A]

Women are not allowed to take the trash out.

[C]

What if you're like. Literally, they were like, the problem with God appeared to you. God appeared to you and was like, in the next five minutes, you must wash the dishes and take the trash out. And you only have time to do one. Would you choose to take the trash out or to wash the dishes?

[D]

Yeah, trash.

[B]

Okay.

[C]

You mean. You seem pretty enthusiastic about laundry.

[D]

No, because it's the one thing.

[A]

What about.

[D]

It's the one thing that's.

[A]

What about laundry?

[D]

But That I will. Like, I like doing. Like, it's okay. Like, like Amanda doesn't want me to do the laundry because she hates how I fold. So that's another thing. Like, she just, she's just like, if I fold it.

[C]

Because I'm just like, Sandra, we do

[A]

have a Go for it. Go for it.

[C]

Yes. Andrew has a rumble rant and she asks, do you guys bring the Christmas stuff into the living room? I assume is that dad's job to bring it into the living room?

[A]

Nope.

[C]

You don't.

[D]

Oh, yeah.

[C]

So, like, it's a big box.

[D]

Yes.

[C]

So. So in my family, when I'm back home in South Dakota, where we have more Christmas decorations than I have at home, we have them in the garage and like a big thing. So, like, it has to be a dude job because you have to get a big ladder and it's extremely large. And then we leave them up until basically Easter because putting them away, that's

[D]

literally how I takes a while. We didn't put Christmas decorations away until my mom started pulling stuff.

[C]

The Neff household during the Bush administration was basically three months of Christmas decorations and then like seven months of Easter decorations and then proper ordinary time where we didn't have either of those up is like one or two months of the year.

[A]

Dude.

[D]

So I'm, I'm. I'm solely convinced that the only reason our house at my, like, that I grew up in had lights in the backyard was because my dad got so tired of, like, having to put up Christmas lights and take them down that. In the backyard. Like on the, in the backyard specifically. He just put them up and never took them down.

[C]

Okay, more. More dad versus mom things. So dad puts Christmas lights on that.

[A]

On that real quick. My, My neighbors, they have a really, really smart way of doing it. They have lights that are, like, programmable in terms of their colors.

[D]

Yeah.

[A]

So it's like Christmas lights, but then you can, you know, I, I guess this is big in Arizona. You guys know about this?

[C]

Yeah, it's a whole thing. You can install permanent lights.

[A]

You can just change it, you know, to like, whatever's going on. So, like, you know, it's St. Patrick's Day. You put up, you know, St. Patrick color.

[D]

Yeah. Our house was always white. My, My, my mom did not like colored lights, so it was white lights.

[C]

Okay. All right. She doesn't like lights of color.

[A]

Huh.

[C]

But anyway, so another related question to this. So, guys, we can assume dad puts up the Christmas lights outside.

[D]

Yeah.

[C]

But does dad also have exclusive decision making power over what the lights are. Like, what? Yeah, you know, if you want to put up Santa or his elves or different things, like, does dad decide all those, or does the wife has. Does mom have aesthetic input in the form the lights?

[B]

Wife should be inside, husband should be outside.

[C]

What about the color of the house? Like, whether it needs to be painted or not?

[D]

Oh, my mom. My mom would paint the house just randomly, very randomly. Like, it would just be like one day she'd be like, you know what? I don't like the fact that all of these walls are tan, so I'm going to paint them.

[A]

Okay.

[D]

So.

[C]

All right, Jack, Jack, you've been quiet here. Do you have an opinion on that?

[A]

No, I was seeing some news. Hey, Tyler, are you in the chat real quick by any chance?

[E]

On.

[A]

In the show chat? Not. Not the. Not the. Not the. Not the.

[C]

Would be breaking news. This would be an extremely breaking news. This would be news that broke.

[A]

Yeah, hold on, hold on.

[B]

Today. But she's bringing the case.

[A]

But, yeah, well, I just. So hold on. I just saw the news that looks like the charges against the Arizona electors was dropped. And it says that, you know, this has been, you know, obviously, Tyler, you were one of the people who was on unfairly, unlawfully, and insanely charged with this. And so radical Democrat Arizona AG Chris Mays has completely folded and dismissed the unconstitutional charges against America's mayor Rudy Giuliani and 17 other innocent Republican co. Defendants. So you. You think that that's going to be re. It's going to be put back on, though, Refiled.

[B]

Yeah. So that. Yeah, so that just happened today. Officially, the charges were dismissed because she had failed at two appeals, both at the. At the appellate court and then the Supreme Court level, and then she ran out of time because they didn't, you know, obviously have. It's just that witch hunt that they're on against Trump, against all of Trump's team, all of us in 2020. But we're now going on more than six years, you know, from this whole thing, and lots of fun.

[C]

We're gonna kill it. Don't worry. I mean, it gets kind of funny at this point. It's like there's the Dickens novel where there's some estate case that goes on for 40 years until it's all exhausted. Like, I can see, you know, when you're dying and when you're on your Deathbed, Tyler, in 50 years and you're planning your tombstone where you say lord of the Rings is gay, they'll also still be litigating this Like Chris Mays, who will by now be 130 years old or whatever. She'll be like, we must indict them over the fake electors. But God willing, this thing is going to stay dead. I just. I find it really hard to imagine them dragging this out to presidential elections past where the supposed offense happened. Speaking of things that are dead. Speaking of things that are dead, we have one more extremely important topic to hit.

[A]

It may not be the final W, but it's still a W. It's coming. I say celebrate your W's, brother.

[C]

Some things that die are Ls, and the big L that we have to talk about is clip 30. We basically murdered Pizza Hut, guys. Clip 35. In the arms of the angel. Fly away from here, from this dark corner? Oh, T. And the endlessness that you fear? You are pro from the wreckage of your silent reveries? You're in the arms of the angel. Was that literally the music in the original? So Pizza Hut is being sold by Yum Brands, the Pepsi spinoff company. Struggling Pizza Hut to be sold for $2.7 billion. It's getting. A private equity firm has bought the brand outside of mainland China. I guess they're keeping it there. I guess Pizza Hut will live on in China, but it's getting sold to a big private equity company. And that doesn't mean it's dead. Dead. But we've seen how this happens with Toys R Us and a lot of other companies we might be seeing. We might see the. We're going to revive Pizza Hut by borrowing a ton of money to remodel them, and then suddenly it has no money.

[D]

Or there's going to be one. There's going to be one Pizza Hut location that's like super retro. That's just in China.

[C]

Yeah. Here's what I would say. If this private equity company borrowed a bunch of money and they use it to remodel every store and they called it Pizza Hut 1992 or whatever.

[D]

Retro.

[C]

And it's retro. It has the red cups. It has the buffets. Every single one of them has a machine with Teenage Mutant Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles. Turtles in Time. And maybe another machine that has Gauntlet Legends and maybe Area 51 and Donkey. I could go on here. If they do that, they might have a shot. But I suspect we're gonna get some nonsense thing where they. They recommit to delivery or something.

[D]

Probably.

[C]

And they're like, every Pizza Hut will get your pizza to you within 17 and a half minutes.

[D]

To be completely. Where it's like it's just. It's just frozen pizzas in your local grocery store.

[A]

You have to understand. So I. I don't know if this. I. I want to be. Don't be too premature on this news, because just of the way that pizza runs locations, most of the locations are franchises. They're not corporate. So you do have to understand that the latest news that we just saw was, like, this. This one guy, you know, he converted all of his locations to pizza classics. I know Bricksuit was just at 1 in Pennsylvania, and they're actually doing really well. So you've got franchisee contracts with the company that they're. You know, just because it was bought out, they do have to actually honor the contracts as well as it's still going. So does it mean that, you know, it's. It's good for the brand? I actually think it could be. You mentioned Toys R Us. Toys R Us is actually making a comeback, by the way. Opening. Yeah, it is. They've been reopening Toys R Us as of. As of last Christmas. You can look it up. There's a thing called the Internet where you can find out information and never seen it.

[C]

And.

[A]

And so you can, you know, it's. It's something where for sure.

[D]

Right.

[A]

Pizza Hut definitely went down a wrong path. Like, I have been, like, nationally known for saying that. That they went down this path of trying to be a delivery place when they've never been delivery plates. Like, they. They should be known as a gathering place. And don't try to compete with all these guys. Like, make Pizza Hut, like. Yeah. Will it be smaller? Will you have to contract and, like, shut down some locations? Yes, obviously. But don't try. This is my. My message. Make Pizza Hut the best place to go and get pizza and specifically target those people, those elder millennials, centennials, Gen Xers, who remember Pizza Hut when it was still good, but it still had that, you know, positive social cachet, and then places where they want to bring their kids to. Which actually was. If you go back to, like, it's been like four years, four and a half years now, that's exactly what I was talking about. I wanted to be able to take my kids to Pizza Hut and have that same, you know, kind of reaction, or like, when, you know, when we won playoff games with the Little League team, gosh, I'd love to be able to take them to Pizza Hut afterwards and go out and, you know, sit down and enjoy that the same way that we did before. So if Pizza Hut really leans into family first Social gatherings, community gatherings, the way that it used to. And embraces its original self and forgets about, you know, just trying to be a delivery place, you know, I mean, obviously you'll have that as well, but you have to really lean in and put the money in up front. I predict that it would actually be more successful.

[C]

You know, I think if they're selling it to a private equity company to make. To turn this around.

[B]

We have.

[C]

We have one more thing on here. There's a guy who might be able to make the numbers work. Oh, and I'm told they're very. The team felt very strongly that we should at least show this clip before the end. And I hadn't seen it until they brought it up. We have to introduce you guys to the new. The new guy running. Running Pizza Hut. He's some dude named Kumar. Clip 36.

[E]

This is a message to all finance bros. My name is Kumar. I'm a retired accountant, and I'm gonna steal your jobs by becoming the biggest accounting influencer in the world.

[C]

My husband wants to be famous, so please follow him.

[D]

Oh, it's so good, dude. It's so good.

[A]

So you think that guy could say, so what? What? So wait, so what is this exactly?

[C]

What isn't it?

[D]

That's the question. This guy has been going viral all over the Internet.

[B]

Harold and Kumar go to Pizza Hut.

[D]

There you go. There you go.

[C]

It's gonna be the top accounting influencer. He's gonna be the next Caleb Hammer.

[D]

He's. Yeah, he's reinventing himself, but. Yeah, no, it's just. It's just a funny. It's. This guy's been taking over the Internet and he. As in the booth, as they say, he looks like the Indian Megamind, which is kind of funny. But, yeah, we have other clips, too, which is really funny. So let's play 38.

[C]

Oh, dear. I say I am him, because who is him?

[E]

Hi. Nice to meet you. I'm him. My name is Kumar. I'm a retired accountant. And even though I cut that girl in half, I have major respect for women, especially my loving, beautiful wife.

[C]

I am Kumar's wife.

[E]

We have been married for 39 years. She is my biggest flex.

[C]

Thank you for supporting my husband. Please follow him and tune in for the next video.

[D]

That's a banger.

[C]

I want to give this guy all my money. I want to give this guy all my money.

[A]

It's. Yeah, he's like, oh, he's doing wealth management. Is that accounting influencer?

[D]

Yeah, he's an accounting influencer. That's just. That's just making videos.

[C]

Who doesn't have a list of their top seven or eight accounting influencers?

[D]

Yeah, I mean, let's. Dude, let's go out. Let's play 39. Because this one's also good, too.

[E]

Not if I do it first.

[A]

Okay.

[E]

My name is Kumar. I'm a retired accountant from New York, and I'm here to share my ball knowledge with the world. This realm will become a better place with my teachings. And, yes, it's all free. And to everyone preying on my downfall, I will be the biggest accounting influencer in the world, and there is nothing you can do to stop me. Class is almost in session, so I'll see you soon.

[A]

Followed, to help my husband achieve his dreams.

[D]

Okay, bro. I need. I need Trump. I need Trump's media team to make some parody.

[C]

I'm actually genuinely a bit missed by this because that. It's funny, but it's actually genuinely funny at this. Yeah, I kind of thought it was. I'd only seen the one earlier. I didn't realize he had a whole sequence.

[E]

1.

[C]

You can kind of dumb luck into it. This guy appears to be good at making videos. How did that guy get so good at making videos?

[A]

But these are. These are very good. And you know, like. Like, when we have things to promote, like, this is definitely what we should be doing, you know?

[D]

Yeah, no, it's. It's. It's. It's incredible. It's. It's a lot of fun.

[A]

The next time we're doing like a. We're doing like a ballot drive or like a vote harvesting drive, you'd be like. You gotta be like, get your. It's like, get your ballot in.

[D]

He hit 1 million followers too, which is crazy.

[A]

Tyler, you could have a million followers, too.

[D]

Come on, Tyler. We got to get the Tyler version of this up.

[A]

I am Tyler

[B]

version of this,

[D]

and I know how to get people to vote.

[B]

Wait.

[C]

Yeah. I'm gonna be the number one election influencer, then have Tyler's wife come in

[A]

and be like, I'm an election

[C]

action guy. And then we have a Tyler show his ball skills.

[D]

It's actually.

[C]

And then we could have a clip where he's just watching Lord of the Rings and then he, like, karate chops or, like, slices.

[A]

No, no, it starts with. It starts with Lord of the Rings. And then Tyler, like, shoves it off the screen. He's like, there's no time for that.

[C]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. You have someone watching. And then he comes in with a katana and slashes the TV in half. And Tyler's like, we don't have time for that. I'm Tyler Bowyer and I'm becoming the number one elections influencer in the world.

[A]

It should be. It should. Not to Katana, though, but what's that? What's the blade like? It turns blue or whatever.

[C]

A lightsaber.

[A]

No, in Lord of the Rings.

[C]

Oh. Oh, yeah. The Sting.

[D]

Yeah.

[B]

I wouldn't know, Jack. I wouldn't know.

[A]

I literally don't know the name. But I'm just saying, like, you should have a Lord of the Rings sword and then cut. Cut the screen and be like, brim hat.

[B]

And I don't watch Lord of the Rings.

[A]

We're go. I mean, the. The chat has actually been kind of like 50 50, so I don't really know what to do. You know, it's. It's very, very.

[B]

It's been like 90, 10. Curve brand.

[A]

No, it's not.

[D]

Come on, Jackie. Peer pressure. Curve the brim. Peer pressure.

[C]

Dylan, Ivy.

[A]

No, I always curve the brim. But, you know, I thought for once, maybe I'll go straight brim. Maybe I'll go. Maybe I'll Fred Durst it, you know, and then. And then everybody else is saying that, you know, everybody else is.

[C]

Straight brim is white boy summer energy.

[A]

That's what I'm saying.

[C]

Noah, who on our producer says straight brim is peaked in high school energy. Ooh, that's gruesome.

[B]

No, flat brim is like Dodgers fans. And.

[E]

Hey,

[A]

that's true.

[B]

Either going to get shanked or you're shanking someone in the parking lot.

[C]

Let's see. Unashamed says curve. Says curve. Laner says curve.

[A]

Straight brim is peak.

[C]

Johnny says Sandra's a curver. I don't know. I feel like.

[A]

Is he reading a Blue Sky Chat? New caboose says curve. But caboose is on the show.

[C]

No, Jack does like the rings is

[A]

straight

[B]

if you're actually

[A]

curve it. Because only Fred can durst it. Only Fred can dirt. Only Fred can durst me.

[C]

All right, what if we. Okay, what if we told Andrew. If we have him back next week, we'll tell Andrew he needs to come in, he has to wear a hat, and he has to bring in.

[A]

It's not slang. I'm just talking about curved. And then curved is not straight. Curved is not straight. Ooh.

[C]

And this will determine it, because if he comes in with the sourdough loaf, then whatever hat he has will be the gayer hat. And then if he forgets the loaf. Whatever hat he has will be the straighter hat.

[A]

I think I'm leaving it straight.

[D]

I'm not following.

[C]

I think this is. I think this is like wisdom of Solomon here.

[D]

Oh, okay. Yeah, fair enough.

[A]

I think I'm leaving it straight. I'm leaving it straight again. I'm leaving it.

[C]

I'm gonna intervene.

[E]

No.

[A]

This one's saying flat is gay. If you're doing Dylan's saying, make curve straight again.

[C]

That is gay. Because Limp Bizkit has a song titled Making Love to Morgan Wallen and they have an album named after a butthole. So straight brim is gay. Okay, we all had a long pause there. Caboose is intruding on in our ears right now. And I didn't know if they can

[D]

hear that boost cam.

[C]

All right, that's good. We've got to have the caboose cam. All right. Excellent.

[A]

Snapbacks. Attacks.

[D]

Thank you, Dylan. Thank you, Dylan.

[A]

You gotta run. I think Tyler's gotta run. I think we're pretty much out.

[D]

Tyler's gotta run. Fun is over.

[C]

Shyla's gonna run straight to the Lord of the Rings marathon showing at the theater tonight.

[A]

I heard Tyler's gonna be watching at the beach all weekend. All right.

[D]

Oh, Jack. Your costume, Jack.

[A]

Okay. Oh, God.

[D]

Vanilla Ice did the straight straight hat, please. Curve it. Zoozy pedals.

[C]

I don't even know if we signed off.

[A]

No curbing.

[D]

No.

[A]

No curving, no swerving. We're staying straight.

[D]

No swerving. No curving.

[A]

No stay straight.

[C]

No curving.

[A]

We stay straight. We stay straight. Can you relate up in Pennsylvania State?

[D]

Not bad. Not bad Rhymes Poso coming out with a rap album near you.

[C]

Nothing straighter than that.

[A]

The name is Poso, in case you don't know.

[D]

Oh, no. Okay, let's.

[C]

We've got to escape.

[D]

We gotta go.

[C]

This has gone on long enough.

[A]

Keep doing this all along.

[C]

Tune in next week where we'll get to the bottom of sourdough bread and all of Jack's Star wars costumes and curved brims and straight brims and gay brims and bi brims. And until we do that, keep committing thought crimes.

[A]

Thought crime is death.