Podcast Summary: I Wish You Were Here

Episode: The Elite Names in Epstein's Birthday Records: Following the Paper Trail

Host: Michelle Cuervo
Date: February 19, 2026

Overview

In this episode, Michelle Cuervo delves into the contents of Jeffrey Epstein’s infamous 238-page “birthday book,” a leather-bound scrapbook assembled by Ghislaine Maxwell for Epstein’s 50th birthday in 2003. Released publicly in September 2025 by the House Oversight Committee, the book's contents offer a rare, disturbing look into Epstein's vast network through handwritten letters, photos, personal anecdotes, and inside jokes contributed by friends, family, business associates, and some of the world’s most powerful names. Michelle systematically works through the sections of the book, highlighting revealing and unsettling themes, always reminding listeners that appearances in the book imply only a personal connection—no criminal allegations are made.

Key Discussion Points & Insights

The Structure and Purpose of the "Birthday Book" (00:00–06:30)

• Ghislaine Maxwell compiled the book, The First 50 Years, collecting written and photographic contributions from Epstein’s inner circle.
• Major sections: Family, Brooklyn, Business, Girlfriends, Children, Friends, Science Girlfriends, Special Assistants.
• Notable names listed in the ‘Friends’ section include Bill Clinton, Alan Dershowitz, Donald Trump.
• Important disclaimer: “Just because somebody's name may or may not be in this book does not mean that they're being accused of any wrongdoing… Literally, all we are doing is flipping through the pages of this book together.” (03:30)

Family & Early Life (06:30–12:20)

• Opens with Maxwell’s letter; intent is to “jog your memory about places, people and different events.”
• The “Family” section contains nostalgic memorabilia: childhood photos, birth certificate, a Boy Scout grad certificate, and warm, proud parental letters.
• Epstein’s mother reminisces about his achievements, and his late father’s included letters recall family trips:
  • “You've been a good son since day one and we have been so proud of you ever since.” (10:05, Epstein’s mother)
• Host Michelle reflects on the contrast with his later infamy, noting: “The feeling of this section, it gives off a sense of normalcy… a normal standard scrapbook.” (08:03)

Brooklyn & Early Dysfunction (12:20–19:30)

• Shift in tone: The section includes crude, graphic letters from childhood friends, especially notable “Johnny Boy.”
  • Describes Epstein’s youthful charisma, manipulation, and entitlement toward women:
    • "You began to realize that you could get away with sh*t, that chicks and people in general were schmucks. You sensed that you were sharper and more astute than most...” (17:10, Johnny Boy)
  • Friends admire and excuse questionable actions; one even calls Epstein a “role model” for his children.
  • Host’s reaction: “It’s an uneasy feeling to say the least.” (19:09)

Girlfriends & “Girl Friends” Sections (19:30–28:15)

• Two separate “Girlfriends” sections (one word vs. two words); all names redacted.
  • Letters are affectionate, some describing extravagant support and lessons from Epstein.
  • Observed possibility of him paying for education in exchange for leverage.
  • Quote: “…the lessons I've learned from you during the past 35 years haven't always been easy or even ones that I would have chosen to learn, but they were always important.” (23:57)
• Host notes the disturbing hindsight—these read differently now knowing Epstein’s crimes.

The “Children” Section (28:15–32:00)

• Most unsettling; all names and images of children redacted.
• Epstein had no known children; unclear why this section exists.
• Includes child-like drawings and adult messages about pictured children; no clarity or context provided.
  • “Who are the children? Why are they in his birthday book? That is a question that nobody has been able to answer.” (29:50)
• Description of unsettling photo montage, little girl pictured repeatedly (30:40–31:25)

“Friends” Section: The Elite & Evasive (32:00–56:00)

Key Elite Contributors:

Opening & Themes

• Contributors include Leon Black, Jean-Luc Brunel, Bill Clinton, Alan Dershowitz, Henry Jarecki, George Mitchell, Joel Paschkow, Leslie Wexner, Mort Zuckerman, Donald Trump, among others (33:00).
• The tone: often disturbing, others in-jokey, and disturbingly flippant about exploitative themes.

Notable Letters, Quotes & Segments

• Masked photo, "Rob and Kill" scheme: “Jeffrey unveiled his plan… Rob and kill was the name of the plan. The first victim redacted, to be attacked and brutally plundered. Would she want more than that?” (34:05)
  • Host’s reaction: "I need a second." (34:35)
• Bill Clinton’s handwritten note:
  • “Jeffrey, Happy 50th. It's reassuring, isn't it, to have lasted as long across all the years of learning and knowing adventures and beyond. And also to have your childlike curiosity, the drive to make a difference in the solace of friends, Right?” (44:38)
  • Michelle: “The childlike curiosity really doesn't sit right with me.” (44:55)
• Alan Dershowitz’s letter:
  • “As a birthday gift to you, I managed to obtain an early version of the Vanity Unfair article. I talked them into changing the focus from you to Bill Clinton… Happy birthday and best regards, guys.” (45:13)
  • Surrounding image: fake “Vanity Unfair” cover implying Epstein as Jack the Ripper (46:05)
• Bill Elkus (venture capitalist):
  • Jokes about Epstein “creating women out of thin air” and arranging models for social street credibility (48:05)
• Nick Lees:
  • Recounts with apparent pride an incident where two men sexually assaulted a woman in a car, described as a “joke” that left Epstein “howling with laughter.” (50:15–52:00)
  • Host: “He then continues to describe the essay as if it was a joke… There was one evening which I recall always had you howling with laughter…” (51:13)
• Peter Mandelson:
  • “Calls Epstein his best pal and includes photographs of Epstein's private island with the caption ‘one of his glorious houses he likes to share with his friends. Yum yum.’” (53:18)
  • Ten pages of photos and gushing praise from a former British political figure.
• Science Section (“legitimate” connections):
  • Scientists (Edelman, Gell-Mann, Kosslyn, Nowak, Smolin) contribute technical or playful letters, reflecting a deep, disturbing legitimacy within academic circles. (55:00)

Donald Trump and Other Public Figures (56:00–61:30)

• Donald Trump's page (164):
  • Features a “conversation” between Epstein and “a Donald”, with hand-drawn sexualized imagery and Trump’s alleged signature.
  • Quote: “There must be more to life than having everything… May every day be another wonderful secret.” (57:20)
  • Trump denies authorship, filed a $10 billion lawsuit against the Wall Street Journal. (58:05)
• Other elite references:
  • Leslie Wexner sends a drawing of a breast labeled as a “birthday gift.”
  • Mort Zuckerman makes jokes about fake biographical details for Epstein.

Science & Harvard Donations (61:30–65:20)

• Host notes how deeply embedded Epstein was in the scientific community.
  • “The Science section is one of the most revealing… because it shows just how deeply embedded Epstein was into legitimate institutional science.” (62:00)
  • Several scientists allow playful, affectionate, yet troubling references to Epstein’s support and involvement.
  • Example: “Steven Koslin… leaves a series of struck through equations and wishes for Epstein's health over another 50 years." (64:45)

“Girlfriend” with Hyphen & Unsettling Artwork (65:20–70:50)

• Additional “girlfriends” section features more affectionate/adoring letters, often competitive in tone.
• Host spotlights one drawing, possibly by Alberto Badini Gomez, signed 2002:
  • “People think that this figure resembles a child… the letter next to it is even weirder.” (68:20)
  • Letter references fond memories and features childlike references, further compounding the sense of secrecy and discomfort.

Testimonials from Women—Notes of Love and Dependency (70:50–76:50)

• Multiple letters from women who were brought to Epstein by Maxwell, describing first encounters when hired to give massages.
  • “Your guidance has kept me on track and encouraged me to grow and think bigger. You built my business and my confidence,” writes one. (73:10)
  • Other letters detail recruitment at social events and admiration for his “usual Epstein smile.”
  • Many revealed through redacted images, some women pictured in lingerie or undressed as part of the contributions.

Disturbing Imagery/Redacted Pages (76:50–80:30)

• Pages entirely redacted or featuring only cryptic messages:
  • “Who am I?” juxtaposed with a redacted face (79:00).
  • One letter describes an international, glamorous life after meeting Epstein, listing encounters with major celebrities and public figures.

“Business” Section & Corporate Contacts (80:30–83:00)

• Birthday wishes from early career associates at Bear Stearns: Jimmy Cayne, Ace Greenberg, Ted Serure, Elliot Wulk, Ira Zickerman.
• Messages here are more mundane—basic well-wishes rather than personal anecdotes.

Conclusion and Reflections (83:00–end)

• Book ends with another note from Maxwell wishing Epstein the “next best 50 years.”
• Host Michelle invites reactions, saying, “I do want to know your thoughts. I want to know if there was any name in here that surprised you. Want to know if there was any information that I told you that you did not already know.” (83:35)
• Her closing note: “Make somebody happy and I will see you in my next video. Massive kiss on the forehead to every single one of you.” (84:25)

Notable Quotes (with Attribution & Timestamps)

• Ghislaine Maxwell, on the book’s purpose (06:14):
  “Some of the letters will definitely achieve their intended goal. Some, well, you will have to read them to see for yourself.”

• Johnny Boy, on Epstein’s personality (17:10):
  “You began to realize that you could get away with sht, that chicks and people in general were schmucks. You sensed that you were sharper and more astute than most…”*

• Bill Clinton, birthday note (44:38):
  “Jeffrey, Happy 50th… your childlike curiosity, the drive to make a difference in the solace of friends, Right?”

• Alan Dershowitz, on Vanity Fair article (45:13):
  “As a birthday gift to you, I managed to obtain an early version of the Vanity Unfair article. I talked them into changing the focus from you to Bill Clinton…”

• Peter Mandelson, best pal message (53:18):
  “One of his glorious houses he likes to share with his friends. Yum yum.”

• Michelle, host’s recurring reminder (03:30): “The presence of someone's name or message in this book means one thing. They knew Jeffrey Epstein at least well enough to wish him a happy birthday. But that's it…”

Notable Memorable Moments

• The “Rob and Kill” plan described by a masked contributor (34:05)—abrupt, unsettling, and unexplained.
• Bill Clinton’s phrasing around Epstein’s “childlike curiosity” (44:38), which Michelle finds particularly disturbing.
• The Vanity Unfair cover parody—visual joke or something more sinister (46:05).
• Nick Lees’s account of sexual assault described as a shared joke (51:13).
• The Trump “conversation” and accompanying illustration, denied and litigated by Trump himself (57:20).
• Entirely blacked-out pages and cryptic, unsigned testimonials from women swept up in Epstein’s world.

Recap Table: Key Segments & Timestamps

| Segment | Description | Timestamp | |------------------------------------|--------------------------------------------------------|-------------------| | Book’s Purpose/Disclaimer | Host explains context and intent | 00:00–03:30 | | Family and Childhood | Parental letters and memorabilia | 06:30–12:20 | | Brooklyn/Adolescent Years | Letters from early friends, emergence of patterns | 12:20–19:30 | | Girlfriends & “GFs” Sections | Letters from women, redactions, grooming implications | 19:30–28:15 | | The “Children” Section | Unclear, redacted, disturbing speculative content | 28:15–32:00 | | “Friends”: Elite Letters | Incendiary/jocular notes from powerful individuals | 32:00–56:00 | | Trump: The Illustrated Conversation| Visual, controversial, legal fallout | 56:00–61:30 | | Science Section | Deep ties to leading scientists, donations | 61:30–65:20 | | Girlfriend Testimonies & Drawings | Grooming, dependency, cryptic artwork | 65:20–76:50 | | Disturbing Imagery / Redactions | Fully blacked out pages, “Who am I?” | 76:50–80:30 | | Business Section | Bear Stearns connections, generic messages | 80:30–83:00 | | Closing Reflections | Host asks audience for reactions | 83:00–end |

Tone & Language

• Michelle’s delivery is conversational but forthright, expressing horror, sadness, and discomfort at several passages:
  • “It’s going to make you uncomfortable. Okay? There’s no way around it.” (32:05)
• She maintains a mix of meticulous attention to detail and emotional realism, breaking down unsettling narratives with clarity and some dark humor to offset the bleakness.
• Strong emphasis on skepticism: “I'm not alleging anything, but…” and clarifies speculation vs. fact.

Summary Takeaways

• The birthday book paints a devastating portrait of Epstein’s far-reaching connections, laying bare the normalization of depraved behavior in elite social circles.
• Letters and images suggest a community that, at best, turned a willful blind eye and, at worst, openly encouraged him.
• The mix of nostalgia, affection, in-jokes, and startlingly candid references to questionable or outright criminal behavior is deeply unsettling throughout.
• Redacted segments and cryptic artwork leave disturbing unanswered questions—especially regarding children and young women in Epstein’s orbit.
• The pervasive involvement of public figures, scientists, and business titans raises major questions about the nature and maintenance of Epstein’s influence.

For Listeners

This episode closely examines the primary document, avoiding speculation about guilt but raising powerful questions about accountability, complicity, and secrecy among the world’s elites. Michelle’s compassionate yet tenacious approach invites listeners to reflect not just on Epstein, but on the systems and attitudes that protected him for so long.