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- [00:00]
Alex Jones
Foreign.
- [00:06]
Host 1 (possibly a main commentator)
The convicted felon president of the United States. Health is in rapid, rapid decline. There is a massive cover up going on at the White House regarding this, but the right wing is starting to figure it out. And Alex Jones, the conspiracy theorist, absolute abject piece of, is starting to get to the bottom of it. Kylie, pop up this headline. We have a crisis. Alex Jones warns that Trump is headed for health collapse. A health collapse. Kylie, now play the clip because you.
- [00:40]
Host 2 (possibly a co-commentator)
Can see him declining faster and faster. It's not super bad yet. But unlike Biden that was completely shot and had all these brain surgeries, the rest of it, Trump has got great genetics. He's tough. And if he takes care of himself, he can make it through these years and then after. But if he doesn't, he's going to have, I predict Trump is going to have some type of collapse within the next 12 months at the current trajectory. I'm not saying he's going to.
- [01:12]
Host 1 (possibly a main commentator)
All right, deep in the heart of maga, he's giving Kanks, who I'm going to refer to him as instead of Kankel's McTaco tits for expediency and efficiency. He's giving Kanks 12 months. 12 months to live. Alex Jones.
- [01:26]
Host 3 (possibly a co-commentator)
Well, here's the thing. He says a couple things that are just really odd. It's not that bad yet, Alex.
- [01:32]
Host 1 (possibly a main commentator)
It's terrible.
- [01:33]
Host 3 (possibly a co-commentator)
His ankles are as big as my head. He's got bruises on his palm from what I think they're giving him IVs. And then he says he has great genes. Let's not forget his dog. His father died of dementia and Alzheimer's. This man's genes tell us exactly where he said it. In my opinion, and I'm not a.
- [01:53]
Host 1 (possibly a main commentator)
Doctor, this is just the fluffery has to go on on the right wing. He's calling out. It's clear that Trump has massive health decline. Not only cognitive, but like his health. But in order to say something, he also has to throw in flattery. Oh, my God, he has great genes. He's a stud. He doesn't have a teeny weeny. I don't care what south park says. So they always have to throw in that pornographic fluffery to make sure they keep the MAGA base hard. All right, next up, you guys. Kanks is actively hiding the cankles. The Daily Beast is reporting Donald Trump lashed out at MSNBC after the Network suggested the 79 year old President is taking steps to hide his cankles from public view. Let's review. You don't see him sitting at the fireplace anymore, flanked with a world leader. Now he's sitting behind the Oval. When Zielinski came, he would normally have had Zielinski in the chair like he did when they bullied him. But then they. They were all at a round table to where the cankles were hidden. He is actively hiding the cankles. Kanks is hiding his kinks.
- [03:09]
Host 3 (possibly a co-commentator)
Here's the thing. I agree with you 100, but the fact that I absolutely, positively know it's true is because he's going bananas about it. And when something triggers him and he gets defensive, that's when he goes bananas.
- [03:22]
Host 1 (possibly a main commentator)
Yeah. And I think, you know this. His health decline, when you combine it with. He has these moments where he's like, I'm trying to get into heaven. People say I'm not doing well. Well, who are these people? The doctors. Right. The doctors are probably saying, you know, look, we're trying to give you blood thinners. We're trying. I mean, I don't know. I'm not a physician, but we're trying to treat this. All the blood's still down in the cankles. And then he, you know, he gets on online. He gets online chronically. He's chronically online, so he sees all of the memes. And then there's a new one out where they show Gavin Newsom's very slim, very hot, very sculpted ankles juxtaposed to Kanks's cankles. And, you know, that stuff just sends him into orbit because he cannot be exposed if you just scratch the slightest bit of a narcissist surface underneath. And especially with Kanks Banks, it's just this boiling, festering, evil insecurity that just comes lashing out. So the fact that he's going after MSNBC after they did a story on him intentionally hiding the cankles, you know, it's true. Okay, and then here is. That's just the physical decline, you guys. Now I want to segue over to the mental decline. Here's Kanks talking to a radio show host. This is Yesterday, about his plans for yesterday evening. Play the audio.
- [04:53]
Alex Jones
I'm going to be going out tonight. I'm going to keep it a secret, but I'm going to go. You're the only one that does. You and your. Lots of listeners. You have a great show. You have a very successful show, by the way, in case you haven't heard that. But I'm going to be going out tonight, I think, with the. With the police, with the. And with the military, of course. So we're going to do a job. The National Guard is great. They've done a fantastic job.
- [05:18]
Host 1 (possibly a main commentator)
Okay, here's the sitting convicted felon Kankles McTawco Tits calling into radio shows when we have all of these geopolitical issues. The markets are collapsing and he's saying that he is going to go patrol the streets of Washington D.C. with the police and the military and the National Guard.
- [05:43]
Host 3 (possibly a co-commentator)
Well, and what an exercise in stupidity all the way around. First of all, I hate the President of the United. United States calling in on these radio shows. The President of the United States should be solving problems, but he can't solve problems because he's too compromised mentally. And for him to go out and make this show, he looks like the biggest dumbass I've ever seen in my life. And people hate him in DC.
- [06:09]
Host 1 (possibly a main commentator)
Well, and the larger narrative that I'm trying to get at here is the mental decline of this absolutely call and he knows. Or does he know? But a sitting President of the United States would know, and this is his second term, would be abundantly aware that he would not be able to go out in Washington D.C. on police patrols. He would know that he couldn't do that, that that would be a national security risk. But it appears to me that he doesn't know that. And so we have just day after day piecing together massive dementia and cognitive decline. That above the fold. That is not in the lead of legacy media. This is something that if Joe Biden were calling in to some radio station, rambling about going out in a squad car, playing, you know, I guess they're all about cosplaying, cosplaying cops and going out and arresting people. They would go bananas. And this is just largely unnoticed. It's, oh, it's just Trump being Trump and the mass cover up of his supporters, the people surrounding him at the White House, legacy media that are actively covering up this man's cognitive decline is something I think that will be studied forever, especially on the foothills of Jake Tapper. Right, his book about Biden. And listen, there's no question Biden was old. I mean, I saw it with my own eyes. You could tell he had aged, but it wasn't this crazy shit. We're not patrolling the roof of the white, talking about putting nukes on it. We're not talking about Hannibal Lecter. We're not giving microphones blowjobs. I mean, this guy just gets crazier and crazier. And so it's super important in this vein, you guys, as we take and keep an eye on what is going on with Kanks. We have to make sure that we are properly vetting our news. And you as citizens or, you know, global citizens, make sure you're getting the facts. And that's why every single morning pumps and I go straight to ground News. And you know, the right wings losing their mind about Cracker Barrel. And so here's just a prime example of what we find on Ground News. The left is reporting the headline as follows. Cracker Barrel debuted a new logo and MAGA is pretty mad about it. On the right, they frame it as such. Cracker Barrel CEO responds to backlash after ridiculous woke rebrand. And it's as bad as you imagine. We're talking about a restaurant. Restaurant. That's how dramatic they make it sound. And the great thing about Ground News is it tells you who owns the news source and it tells you the factuality rating in it. Pumps And I love that part. She's always, oh, look at this. It's mixed factuality or very low factuality. And you can imagine which side when it says lean right, the low factuality goes down. So, listener, join us by going to groundnews.com ihip to get your 40% off the ground news vantage plan that Pumps and I use every single day. They are subscriber funded and our favorite part is they are female. Founded by subscribing, you're not only getting a tool we all need today, you're also supporting our work here at IHIP News. That's ground gr o u n dnews.com forward/ihip Kylie has linked that right below in the show notes. All right, moving along and keeping Trump's dementia and cognitive decline at the top of the news cycle. And we need to keep this Epstein. There's so many things we have walk, chew, gum, do cartwheels, all the stuff all at the same time. But here we have Kanks going to meet with police in D.C. and this is what he is saying to a group of policemen. Play the clip.
- [10:06]
Host 2 (possibly a co-commentator)
Good at grass because I have a lot of golf courses all over the place. I know more about grass than any human being, I think, anywhere in the world. And we're going to be regressing all of your parks, all brand new sprinkler systems, the best that you can buy. Just like Augusta. It'll look like Augusta. It'll look like, more importantly, Trump National Golf Club. That's even better. But we're going to look, we're going to have all brand new, beautiful grass, you know, like Everything else. Grass has a life. Do you know that? Grass has a life?
- [10:35]
Host 1 (possibly a main commentator)
Okay, pause it right there for those of you that are listening. You see all the white, crusty men surrounding Trump with this smug look on their face like, oh, he's so funny. They're regressing. He's a grass expert. He has a PhD in ass. What a riot. That's a real knee slapper. And then you see this female police officer, stone cold serious. She gets how ridiculous this is. She's not engaging in it. He is demeaning every single person around him. If he were at the Memory Care Wing having this conversation, I get it. If you're in a nursing home at the domino table or playing bingo and you're rambling on about being the world's top grass expert, it would be a real knee slapper. You'd leave and you'd get in the car and you'd be like, papa Kank. Sure is a riot. He thinks he knows more about grass than anybody in the world. Boy, he's such a nut. And you ride home and you think, thank God he doesn't live with us and we don't have to change that diaper. Well, in the United States of America, we trot this guy out who has militarized the police who are kidnapping citizens. And 71% of the people that they are kidnapping have zero criminal record, and they're so unserious. They trot him out and he's claiming to be the top expert on grass in the world.
- [11:54]
Host 3 (possibly a co-commentator)
Well, here's the thing. He thinks he's the expert about everything in the world. Just going back to the photo for a minute. Doug Burman. His face. I looked at that. Kylie, will you put that back up?
- [12:05]
Host 1 (possibly a main commentator)
It looked like love.
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Host 3 (possibly a co-commentator)
It looks like love. Look at that. And these are the alpha, alpha, alpha male. Twitter.
- [12:13]
Host 1 (possibly a main commentator)
Pause it. Far right. The guy on the far right. It looks like love.
- [12:17]
Host 3 (possibly a co-commentator)
It's love.
- [12:18]
Host 1 (possibly a main commentator)
Worship it is cult like love. It is broke back mountain. I can't quit you. Love is what that is. This is pathetic. This is an American face plant. These people are abject dipshits. That's all we have. We're gonna have more drops today, but listen up. Support pumps and me, you guys, we're trying to keep everybody sane. Keep you laughing, keep you focused. The best way to support us is to go purchase our book, if you can believe it. Two old broads wrote a book. It's called Life is a Lazy Susan of Shit Sandwiches. And you can click our link in bio to order it, and it's a great little weekend read. We'll see you all later.
- [13:11]
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