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Co-host 1
Foreign.
Co-host 2
It's hard to decide which of the little boys that work for Donald Trump are the most incompetent. But today we're going to pick on Pete Hegseth because that's always fun. And Pete Hegseth was out campaigning against one of the only Republicans who doesn't want to protect pedophiles. Let me say that again. Out of all of the Republicans in Congress and Senate, there is one man who doesn't want to protect pedophiles. The party of family values, the party of traditional marriage, the party of, as Katie Miller says, you need to breed and have all of these babies. Guess what? Stephen Miller doesn't. Stephen Miller wants to protect pedophiles. So here we have Hegseth and he's dealing with some bad wind in speech. Play the clip, everybody.
Clip Speaker
It's an honor to be here. No better way start a week than with soldiers. Truly, it's my honor to be here with you.
Co-host 2
I'm an atheist and I really don't believe in magical thinking. But the fact that the wind was blowing and just sabotaging his performance there, it makes me think in divine of divine intervention, like a petty God up there, like this guy.
Co-host 1
I completely agree. And what's interesting to me is we are at war with Iran. We started it. We have no clear objectives. We are getting our asses kicked. Pete Hegseth is running around trying to hide the damage to US military bases, but yet he's able to go to China. Yet he's able to campaign for all these people. And here's the thing. He is so, so incompetent. If I had a candidate, even if I was madly in love with the candidate that he was stumping for, I would say, look what he's doing in Iran. If he endorses my candidate, I'm not voting for him. But I dare say that won't be the case because these people love a fake alpha male. They love for somebody to get up there and beat their chest and act Like Annette, who has no real power and who is faking and lying and cheating. We know that because they like Donald Trump.
Co-host 2
Yeah, I mean, it's just, it's moral collapse on full display. And I don't think there's ever been an advertisement against like broken heterosexual men than this regime. Like they are doing such brand damage to straight men. It's, it's really confounding. And then we have, speaking of brand damaging alleged straight men, we have our little smokey eye sociopath, J.D. vance. And here he is completely face planting in another speech because the guy has no Riz and is America's top prostitute. Play the clip.
Clip Speaker
What, what did they give this crowd to drink before they got here?
Co-host 2
He's like, yeah, they have to be drunk. Nobody ever hoots and hollers for me like that. These guys have got to be all liquored up. Nobody sober would ever cheer for me like that. I mean, Hexeth and Cash Patel have to be 40 sheets in the wind to give me an attaboy. You know what?
Co-host 1
So just such a stunning collapse of morals. I think JD Vance, he encapsulates it the most. But you look at like, I hope none of Betty and his crowd that was there died because we look at what happened with the Pope, we look about his negotiation skills. He's in charge of fraud. Like this man, because Trump hates him so much and to use your word, rat him all the time he goes out and every time he goes out, I would think that he's probably a nervous wreck because he knows I'm getting fucked. I'm getting fucked every time I go out the door. So I mean, just even the tiniest bit of affirmation does it for J.D.
Co-host 2
you know, I think that you project that he, you know, feels all of that anxiety and stuff because you're a normal person, pumps with a conscience. I don't think he does. I think he goes out 10 foot tall and bulletproof because the way all of these people act as though they is as though they are never going to face accountability. I've never seen any of them act even remotely scared or shy away to a stature or a stance that is that of wanting transparency in the rule of law. I'm always so fascinated by how confident they are in their incompetence. It really is fascinating to me. And the rat that I've been diagnosing for quite some time is in full swing. So here's how it goes. Trump hates J.D. vance because the weird tech bros like Peter Teal Elon Musk we know from that Vanity Fair article, nobody likes Elon Musk. Nobody in the Trump regime likes him. He's a weirdo, he's a nut. He's on ketamine all the time. So they put Vance in this position because they want Vance to be their prostitute. Because none of these guys, Musk, Peter Thiel, none of them have the balls to put their name on the ballot and go run themselves and win an election. So they have to buy JD Vance, our little smokey eye, sociopath, complete prostitute, install him. Trump is pissed about it. So the rat is beginning. Sends him to Hungary, sends him to Pakistan, and now makes him the fraud czar. Oh, what Also sent him to campaign with or to a turning point USA with Erica Kirk. The crowd was so abysmal, even Erica Kirk no showed. But I digress. So he's talk now. Trump's like, yeah, you're going to be the fraud czar, buddy. The most corrupt, fraudulent thief in American history. And Vance says this on the same day that Trump goes around a federal judge and then announces his DOJ, announces a $1.776 billion slush fund, which I'm certain will be deemed illegal. And here's what Vance has to say on this same day.
Clip Speaker
The simple principle that I have, which is if you are committing fraud against the American people, you ought to go to prison.
Co-host 2
Agreed. I agree. J.D. i agree. But that's what I'm talking about. Do you see how he's up there just like, hello, like there's no self awareness. Like these guys govern, like they are wrapped in Kryptonite, 10 foot tall and bulletproof.
Co-host 1
Well, when you put it like that. It terrifies me what they know that we don't, about how they're going to make the 2026 election and the 2028 election. How are they going to interfere to such a degree that no matter how many people vote and. And I'm hopeful this cannot happen. But it just makes me wonder what they are doing behind the scenes because we see all the shit they're doing about elections in the four. So what is going on behind the scenes?
Co-host 2
And it's.
Co-host 1
Sometimes I get so upset about it and then I think we are the biggest country. We have 340 million people. They cannot fool that many people.
Co-host 2
So just use this as a soothing sav for you. They are incompetent. So we can only assess that the rigging itself might somewhat be incompetent as well. I mean, these people are breathtakingly incompetent. The Trump Regime is America's version. We have put forth our worst straight men imaginable. This is our worst foot forward. They have up everything so badly that I assume that even their attempts at trying to sabotage elections, which are going to be really difficult because of how localized our elections are. And yes, they're gerrymandering and yes, they're doing all of these horrific things, removing black voices from government. But this is a time for white people to use their privilege to go out and march and protest and write letters. And I think we also need to hit up industry titans. They're not getting near enough heat from us. And then of course, it is not an American news cycle without reporting on a mass shooting. There's a mass shooting at a mosque yesterday in San Diego. Pop this up. Three adults were killed in the shooting attack at the Islamic center of San Diego, including a mosque security guard whom police say likely prevented an even larger massacre. San Diego Police said the two suspected shooters, ages 17 and 19, were later found dead inside a vehicle several blocks away from an apparent self inflicted gunshot wounds. Authorities confirmed all children and staff at the Moss School complex were safely evacuated or locked down without injuries. Police, police and the FBI are investigating the attack as a potential hate crime. And what I have to say about this is this is why it is so important to always link human rights. And everybody can fall prey to hate crimes and to bigotry. We see this happen at synagogues now. We're seeing it happening at mosques. We've seen it happen in black churches, we've seen it happen in gay nightclubs. And then America is so crazy, we just see it happening in movie theaters. And first and foremost, we have a runaway, immoral, crazy gun, gun laws in this country. And secondly, there are efforts right now for sure on the right, but within centrist democratic movements and corporate democratic movements to squash any talk of rising Islamophobia and rising anti black racism and only lift up the rising anti Semitism when in fact all of these things are linked. There is rising Islamophobia, There is rising anti Semitism, There is rising homophobia. There is definitely for sure America's number one form of racism, anti black racism so badly that they're making laws to remove black lawmakers. We cannot pick one group over another. In any centrist Democrat that tries to get candidates that do this, that try to both sides of genocide, that try to both sides the trans issue, they will rat you. It just doesn't hurt as bad as quickly as it does with Republicans.
Co-host 1
I completely agree and I think it's very well said. I just, when I look at these things, I think the one thing we want to talk about is gun control. And then the what in my mind it goes to. And I realize these shootings happen all the time, but when you get to the bottom of it, in most situations it is somebody that perpetrated the crime has been radicalized somewhere online. And I just have no confidence in Cash Patel's FBI that he is monitoring these places on the Internet where people are radicalized into believing that they must take matters into their own hands. And this is a serious, serious issue and we need to put resources to it in kind with the kind of violence and hate that is circulating in these radicalized groups.
Co-host 2
All right, listener, I've talked to you guys about this before, but I cannot emphasize it enough. When Pamps and I started this podcast, we genuinely did not know what we were doing. We didn't know how to set up the infrastructure for any of the business side of it. That's when we leaned into Shopify. Shopify made it so easy and effortless. Listeners. Shopify is the commerce platform behind millions of businesses around the world and 10% of all e commerce in the US from household names like Chubby's Magic Spoon and of course the I've had it podcast to brands that are just getting started. And what if you get stuck? No problem. Because Shopify is always around to share advice with their award winning 24. 7 customer support listeners. Start your business business today with the industry's best business partner, Shopify and start hearing. Sign up for your $1 per month trial today at shopify.comihib go to shopify.comihip that's shopify.comihip and according to CNN, one of the suspects took three weapons from their parents home. So this is obviously we have these ridiculous gun laws. How many times do we hear about young people that take a weapon from their parents? Hear about it every single time. Hate speech was scrawled on one of the weapons. Officials also found a suicide note that contained writings about racial pride, according to multiple law enforcement officials. According to the Gun Violence Archive, there have been more than 150 mass shootings reported across the country this year. That's more than one mass shooting a day in the United States of America. And you must understand that the reason nobody does anything about gun violence is because Americans value profit over human beings. The reason the corporate Democrats third way that has been all, you know, doing all of this moderate Democrat positioning into the midterms. The reason they do not platform universal human rights is because of money. Because of money. That is the cancer in the United States. Is money important? Yes, we all need it. Does it make your life easier? Yes, I will admit it does. Financial anxiety is paralyzing. But we have to, we just have to value human beings a nudge more then we do profit because this is the end result. It happens so much. You get so many alerts on your phone living in America about gun violence and I hate to say this that sometimes I'm mid sentence talking to somebody, I look down, it's like shooting and blah, blah and I just kind of look down and put my phone down and continue and barely miss a beat. That's so sick. I mean that is just really, really sickening. And I knew when those kids got killed in Connecticut that, and you know the Republicans, the family values, they would much rather take money from the NRA than they would save kids. And then finally we have, let's pop this up. This is Amin Abdullah, the security guard who police say prevented a much larger massacre at the mosque. He is a father to eight children. He is a hero and should be remembered. He was killed. And all of these lives are so important and I feel like we live in a new cycle right now where when I read about international things happening when settlers are killing people in the west bank or when journalists are killed in Gaza or civilian infrastructure is being carpet bombed in Iran, that there is the, an institutional default setting that those lives are insignificant, that these other lives are more important. And I don't think we're ever going to get out of this cycle of violence until we value each individual life. Nobody picks where they're born. And to all of the journalists who have bravely fought in just to survive and do their jobs in Gaza, in the west bank that have been targeted and killed, some of them American citizens and that just goes completely, completely unchecked, misses the news cycle. And so when this stuff hits our news cycle, death and violence is becoming such a feature of America and, and, and not a bug. I mean we live in a very violent society where the people who have power would rather take checks from the NRA than they would prevent people from being killed. And I mean you can look no further than Moses, my grinder Johnson who puts his hand on the Bible non stop, will not shut the up about how tidy is with the Lord and then will vote 12 times out of 10 for death. And I've said it once and I'm going to say it again, the Republican party and MAGA is an anti family death cult. All of their policies lead to death.
Co-host 1
Yeah, it really is sad when you boil it down. Corporations have more power. Guns have more power than human life. And it's just. It's a sad state of affairs. And it's no wonder. People who are sending their children on trips abroad to, you know, education, like, semester exchange, that they're. They're taking pause because they're like. Too many people are shot with random gun violence in the United States, and I don't blame them.
Co-host 2
Yeah, think about it. If you're like some, you know, a international person and you're looking at where to travel. I don't. I mean, I think I'd be like, I don't know if I want to go to the United States. It seems like everybody's getting shot with guns over there. All right, listen, a great way to support our channel is to pre order my book. It's called Not Today Fascists. The link is right below in the show notes. Also, make sure you subscribe and like this episode. And we'll be back later with more news. Sam.
Episode: JD Vance Humiliated By Tiny Crowd, Trump's Sycophants Desperately Campaign For Votes
Date: May 19, 2026
Hosts: Jennifer Welch & Angie “Pumps” Sullivan
In this irreverent and politically sharp episode, Jennifer and Angie (“Pumps”) offer comedic yet incisive commentary on the latest political absurdities—focusing mainly on the ineptitude of Trump loyalists, especially JD Vance and Pete Hegseth, and the Republican Party’s moral collapse. The hosts weave in personal anxieties, caustic humor, and genuine outrage about rising political corruption, American gun violence, and the dangerous trends in both right-wing and centrist politics. The episode also covers a tragic mass shooting and broader systemic failures around gun control and human rights.
Target of the Day: Pete Hegseth
“It's hard to decide which of the little boys that work for Donald Trump are the most incompetent. But today we're going to pick on Pete Hegseth because that's always fun.” (00:34, Angie)
“The fact that the wind was blowing and just sabotaging his performance there, it makes me think of divine intervention—like a petty God up there.” (01:36, Angie)
Hegseth’s Incompetence and the Iran War
“We have no clear objectives. We are getting our asses kicked. Pete Hegseth is running around trying to hide the damage to US military bases, but yet he's able to go to China and campaign for all these people.” (01:50, Jennifer)
JD Vance: “America’s Top Prostitute”
Angie unleashes a signature roast on Vance’s lackluster speeches and desperation for approval:
“He has no Riz and is America's top prostitute.” (02:50, Angie)
Plays audio of Vance awkwardly referencing the crowd being “liquored up,” highlighting his lack of charisma.
Jennifer and Angie agree Vance is “encapsulating a stunning collapse of morals” and is only seeking any affirmation he can get.
Angie gives a breakdown of the MAGA ecosystem:
Notable Quote:
“He's like, yeah, they have to be drunk. Nobody ever hoots and hollers for me like that. These guys have got to be all liquored up. Nobody sober would ever cheer for me like that.” (03:36, Angie imitating Vance)
Vance on Fraud: Pot, Meet Kettle
“It terrifies me what they know that we don't, about how they're going to make the 2026 election and the 2028 election.” (07:25, Jennifer)
“They are incompetent. So we can only assess that the rigging itself might somewhat be incompetent as well.” (08:08)
Angie reports on the mass shooting:
"Three adults were killed in the shooting attack at the Islamic Center of San Diego, including a mosque security guard whom police say likely prevented an even larger massacre." (09:38)
Connecting Gun Violence to Political and Social Failure
Angie underscores America’s normalized gun violence:
“We have runaway, immoral, crazy gun laws in this country.” (10:45)
Jennifer links mass shootings to online radicalization and expresses distrust in current (Trump-aligned) FBI leadership:
“I just have no confidence in Cash Patel's FBI that he is monitoring these places on the Internet where people are radicalized into believing that they must take matters into their own hands.” (11:55)
Angie issues a blistering indictment of the prioritization of profit over safety:
“The reason nobody does anything about gun violence is because Americans value profit over human beings.” (14:45)
“You get so many alerts on your phone living in America about gun violence and I hate to say this... I just kind of look down and put my phone down and continue.” (15:34)
Remembering the Victim
“All of these lives are so important... there is an institutional default setting that those lives are insignificant, that these other lives are more important. And I don't think we're ever going to get out of this cycle of violence until we value each individual life.” (16:53)
International Perspective
“It's a sad state of affairs. And it's no wonder. People who are sending their children on trips abroad... they're taking pause.” (18:32)
Angie, on Trump loyalists’ “brand damage to straight men”:
“I don't think there's ever been an advertisement against broken heterosexual men than this regime.” (02:50)
Jennifer, on JD Vance’s humiliation:
“Every time he goes out, I would think that he's probably a nervous wreck because he knows I'm getting fucked. So even the tiniest bit of affirmation does it for JD.” (03:55)
Angie, on rampant gun violence:
“Death and violence is becoming such a feature of America and, and, and not a bug. I mean we live in a very violent society where the people who have power would rather take checks from the NRA than they would prevent people from being killed.” (16:53)
Angie, on the Republican Party:
“The Republican party and MAGA is an anti family death cult. All of their policies lead to death.” (17:44)