Transcript
Mochi Health Representative (0:00)
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Political Commentator (0:54)
JD Vance's eyeliner is getting worse and worse. You gu. Guys, I'm telling you, we are like the pre smokey eye. So you may know that they were going to send us Vance to Greenland. Everybody hates America and Greenland. They want no part of being Americans. They don't want any part of this. JD Vance is hell bent on trying to make this happen. He's using very provocative language abroad and then at home he's gaslighting the American public and saying, oh, Greenland, can't wait to be a mere be a part of America. Meanwhile, he's doing all of this with this. I'm telling you guys, this is. We are. We have entered from just eyeliner. We know he wants to get to the smokey eye. Now we're in the pre smokey eye. Play the clip.
Political Analyst (1:40)
It's Shady Vance, the vice president. And you know, there was so much excitement around Usha's visit to Greenland this Friday.
Political Commentator (1:47)
Okay, look at that. Look at that you guys. I mean this is the pre smokey eye. I can even see a little bit of a wing here. He's taken the eyeliner out a little bit. I'm telling you, I think we're one news cycle away from this queen popping a full blown smokey eye. And I just want to remind everybody everything he's saying is total bullshit. All of it. Nobody's excited about Usha Vance or JD Vance going to green Greenland. Nobody is. All right, next up, we have complete religious fanatic nut job speaker of the House Moses Mike Johnson. And of course he thinks he's such hot shit now. He thinks he can do away with the courts. Listen to this clip. Authority over the federal courts. As you know, we can, we can eliminate an entire district court. We have power, funding over the courts and all these other things. But desperate times call for desperate measures And Congress is going to act. So stay tuned for that. Okay? The desperate time right now is that we have an unelected un American born, South African born drug addict named Elon Musk dismantling the United States government, rewarding himself contracts. The only reason that Elon Musk is a billionaire is because of American taxpayers. Desperate times call for desperate measures. If Mike Johnson were the big guy Christian that he says he is, he would be joining with the Democrats on impeachment, impeachment proceedings right now. But he's not. He's a little puppet. He's a little puppet for Trump. This guy is the biggest crazy hypocrite in the United States government. He believes that he hears God speaking to him. And I just want to remind everybody that Moses Mike Johnson lives with this evangelical grifter who is rumored to be a closeted homosexual who is funded by another crazy grifter out of Nashville. And the rumors all over Nashville is that this guy is a closeted homosexual. And this is who the speaker of the House lives with in Washington D.C. and we're supposed to let this guy dismantle the federal courts? The only thing that we have right now keeping this whole thing from falling apart. It's insanity. But you would think that such a big Christian like Moses Mike Johnson, he would be all about family values, he'd be all about the kids, because that's what Jesus would want him to do. And so you think that he would be very outspoken about this next headline. Florida considers bill to roll back child labor laws to fill jobs once held by undocumented migrants. So think about this. We are deporting our workforce and there's going to be such a void for the work that Florida is going to put the kids to work. This is insanity. I mean, the one thing that I think I valued or I tried to value about being American was that at least, maybe the progress was slow, but at least we were working towards expanding rights. We were working towards trying to make this place better. MAGA is completely wanting to send our country to the dark ages. It is insane. And most of these MAGA men are big, big Jesus guys. Okay, next up, we have the right wingers are losing their mind. I mean, they are stage five meltdown over Jasmine Crockett. So Governor Abbott of Texas is handicapped and he's in a wheelchair and a tree fell on him when he was younger and he sued for the injury and he received millions of dollars. And since then he has put laws in place that would make it more difficult for victims of accidents. Like him to have recourse in the courts. And he also has voted to defund disabled children in schools. And everybody in Texas, whether you like it or not, calls him Governor Hot Wheels. That's what he's called. And Jasmine Crockett just called him that. And they're all losing their minds. Play the clip. Because we in these hot ass Texas streets, honey. Y'all know we got Governor High Wheels down there. Come on now. And. And the only thing hot about. Okay, so this is the comedy is legal now, guys. And what I have to say to all you right wingers that don't like her picking on Greg Abbott. Tough titties. Tough titties. This is what you guys do all the time. We're done with always having to be the people that are always on the high road while every single one of you mold and bend and do moral and mental gymnastics so that you can please this grotesque, grotesque, fat ass, bad makeup Donald Trump with his closeted homosexual vice president that pops a smokey eye who went to Peter Thiel gay camp, and we're supposed to just always be perfect for you guys. She called him Governor Hot Wheels because that guy's a piece of shit. But let me tell you something. The difference between Abbott and Jasmine Crockett is this. Jasmine Crockett will always fight for disabled people. She will always fight for minorities. She will always fight for the LGBTQ plus people. She fights for everybody. Governor Abbott fights for no one except for Donald Trump and other rich Texans. He is a disgrace. And they, they are so rich about this because they all voted for the guy that did this. Play the clip.
