Follow your Instincts with Henry Winkler

Summary

Podcast Summary: IMO with Michelle Obama and Craig Robinson

Episode: Follow your Instincts with Henry Winkler
Release Date: December 24, 2025
Hosts: Michelle Obama & Craig Robinson
Guest: Henry Winkler

Episode Overview

This lively and heartfelt episode features Henry Winkler—actor, producer, bestselling children's author, and cultural icon best known as "The Fonz" from Happy Days. Michelle and her brother Craig explore Henry's wide-ranging career, challenges with dyslexia, multigenerational insights on parenting, and the importance of following your instincts. With warmth, humor, and candor, the trio dives into how formative experiences shape who we become as parents, professionals, and people.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. The Legacy of The Fonz and Early Impressions

• Michelle admits to having a childhood "crush" on the Fonz and describes his influence on her upbringing:
  • “First of all, sexy. Now, what did I know about sexy? … It did something to me. It's like, woo.” (00:04-00:17, 29:46–29:57)
• Henry is visibly moved hearing how much his character affected Michelle and Craig:
  • “I don’t have to say another word. I can go home now.” (00:18, 31:36–32:03)

2. Henry Winkler’s Career: Beyond Happy Days

• Overview of Henry's 50+ years in show business, including acting, producing, and authoring over 40 children’s books.
• Craig highlights Henry’s role in Barry and his lasting relevance in Hollywood. (06:00–07:13)
• Henry discusses his new History Channel show, Hazardous History, and how his career continues to evolve:
  • “People keep asking me, am I going to retire? … And I think that is, like, the furthest thing from my imagination.” (09:20–09:39)

3. Overcoming Dyslexia and Building Resilience

• Henry shares his struggles with dyslexia—unable to read fluently until age 31—and how it shaped his self-esteem and learning style:
  • “How you learn has nothing to do with how brilliant you are.” (12:27–13:00)
• He describes using his listening skills to compensate and succeed:
  • “My learning is through my ear. So when you say listening, I have to listen because that’s how I learn.” (24:11–24:26)
• Collaboration with co-author Lin Oliver and the creation of the “Detective Duck” series. (11:13–11:59)

4. Childhood, Family, and Early Dreams

• Henry’s upbringing in New York was challenging, with emotionally distant parents and feeling unaccepted:
  • “I never felt accepted. ... Every time I left my bedroom with a smile… I was in a war zone.” (13:53–14:27)
• He dreamed of being an actor from a very young age, motivated by imagination and inner fire.
  • “All I know is I just kept it. I kept the fires burning.” (15:39–15:59)
• The family business (mahogany) holds no appeal—his sights set on “Hollywood.” (15:07–15:34)

5. Parenting Philosophy and Identity

• Michelle shares her mother’s wisdom:
  • “She used to say, you know, I’m not raising children, I’m raising people.” (20:15–20:32)
• Discussion on intentional parenting, recognizing each child’s uniqueness, and the dangers of projecting your dreams onto your kids:
  • “If you are looking for someone to live out your dreams ... you are not going to see who this child is because you already have a sense of what you want them to be.” (21:40–22:27)
• Henry agrees, reflecting on generational change and offers that kids’ core traits show early.

6. Finding Strength Through Therapy & Self-Discovery

• After years of low self-esteem—despite outward fame—Henry sought therapy in his 70s:
  • “About 10 years ago, I was so confused. I met a therapist… I was a block of Swiss cheese… I wanted to become a block of cheddar.” (38:13–38:52)
• Therapy empowered him to speak up, set boundaries, and claim his place in the world:
  • “I’m able to say, I really need this. ... I am perfectly okay with that. As opposed to dance around in some sort of crazy chicken dance.” (41:01–41:38)
• This growth, he notes, allowed him to play more complex roles, like Gene Cousineau in Barry.

7. Following Instincts and the Importance of the "Tummy Voice"

• Henry’s advice: trust your instincts over intellect alone:
  • “Your mind only knows a little. Your tummy knows everything. When you listen to your instinct, you’re always in the right place.” (42:49–43:05)
• He and Michelle riff on decision making that’s “felt,” not overanalyzed.

8. Parenting Adult Children & Grandparenting

• Henry’s golden rule for supporting grown kids:
  • “You really don’t have a place in parenting your adult children. ... It is so difficult to shut up.” (54:24–54:36)
  • “Talk in short sentences. A parent will talk in paragraphs. ... Short sentences, and they will hear you.” (55:32–55:34)
• The pain and necessity of “letting them hit the wall”—allowing kids to fail, learn, and grow.
  • Michelle: “You have to watch the person, the being you love the most, walk straight into a wall that you see. ... I needed to let you do that. That’s a hard thing to do.” (57:13–58:07)
• Henry describes the joys and surprises of grandparenting his seven grandchildren and being used as a “gardening tool” by his daughter around suitors. (48:59–49:51)

9. Listener Q&A with Parenting Advice

• Terri from Colorado asks how to parent adult children.
• Henry offers pragmatic advice: authenticity, listening, restraint, and the wisdom of saying little but staying present. (54:00–56:07, 60:03–61:21)
• The importance of giving children the “confidence to meet their destiny.” (58:07–58:31)

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Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• On Dyslexia and Success:
  “How you learn has nothing to do with how brilliant you are.”
  — Henry Winkler (13:00)

• On Parenting Philosophy:
  “I’m not raising children, I’m raising people.”
  — Marian Robinson (quoted by Michelle, 20:32)

• On Self-Belief and Instincts:
  “Your mind only knows a little. Your tummy knows everything. When you listen to your instinct, you’re always in the right place.”
  — Henry Winkler (43:05)

• On Therapy:
  “I was a block of Swiss cheese growing up. ... I wanted to become a block of cheddar.”
  — Henry Winkler (38:39–38:52)

• On Parenting Adult Children:
  “You really don’t have a place in parenting your adult children. … It is so difficult to shut up.”
  — Henry Winkler (54:24–54:36)

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Timestamps for Important Segments

| Timestamp | Segment / Discussion | |--------------|-------------------------------------------------------------------------| | 00:00–00:17 | Michelle’s early “Fonz” crush; Henry’s reaction | | 06:00–07:13 | Introduction of Henry’s career, Barry, and his 80th birthday | | 09:20–13:00 | Henry settling into work in his 80s, overcoming dyslexia | | 13:53–15:59 | Childhood experiences and the drive to be an actor | | 20:15–22:27 | Parenting wisdom—raising people vs. children, finding your ‘why’ | | 29:44–33:23 | Breaking down The Fonz’s appeal and cultural impact | | 37:47–41:38 | Therapy, self-discovery, filling in the “Swiss cheese” holes | | 42:49–43:35 | Henry on trusting instincts, “listening to your tummy” | | 54:24–55:54 | Listener question: parenting adult children—“short sentences” advice | | 58:07–58:58 | Giving children confidence to meet their destiny | | 60:03–61:21 | Parental restraint: the wisdom of saying less, listening more | | 64:14–65:04 | Closing: Birthday serenade and laughter |

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Tone & Atmosphere

Relaxed, humorous, candid, and heartfelt—each participant brings warmth and authenticity. Banter abounds (especially about Michelle’s “Fonz” fascination and Craig’s Vineyard Vines whale shirt). Henry’s reflections are punctuated with self-deprecating humor and deep insight, supported by Michelle and Craig’s personal family stories.

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In Closing

This episode richly illustrates Henry Winkler’s extraordinary journey—from feeling “unseen” as a dyslexic child to becoming an internationally beloved actor and mentor. His humility, vulnerability, and candor on the challenges of family, confidence, and legacy make this a standout conversation, with practical wisdom for parents, creatives, and anyone looking to “follow their instincts.”

Transcript

[Michelle Obama]

So let me tell you who the Fonz was, at least to me.

[Henry Winkler]

I'd love to hear it from you.

[Michelle Obama]

First of all, sexy. Now, what did I know about sexy?

[Henry Winkler]

I'm sitting differently in my chair right now.

[Michelle Obama]

What did I at the age, and I can't do the math, but I was young. It did something to me. It's like, woo. Yeah. And the.

[Henry Winkler]

Can I just say something?

[Craig Robinson]

What?

[Henry Winkler]

Oh, wait a minute. I just want to say something. I'm a human being on this earth. I'm an American. I've watched you over all of these years be this powerful presence in the universe, and you're telling me. I want to just say. I don't have to say another word. I can go home now.

[Michelle Obama]

This episode is brought to you by Rivian and Progressive Insurance. Hey, Craig Robinson.

[Craig Robinson]

Michelle Vaughn.

[Michelle Obama]

So what's the whale for?

[Craig Robinson]

This was in your honor. This.

[Michelle Obama]

You.

[Craig Robinson]

I'm surprised you don't know what this is.

[Michelle Obama]

Okay, tell me.

[Craig Robinson]

This is a Vineyard Vines shirt from Martha's Vineyard. Are you trying to get me to be a Vineyard guy? And I'm trying to embrace it and you don't even know what this is?

[Michelle Obama]

Well, I noticed the whale and I thought it was very cute and I thought, oh, he's got a little whale on it.

[Craig Robinson]

Yes, it is a little sperm whale.

[Michelle Obama]

Are you sure it's a sperm whale?

[Craig Robinson]

I am.

[Michelle Obama]

Okay. Did you research it?

[Craig Robinson]

I did not research it. I can tell what a sperm. Do you remember back in.

[Michelle Obama]

That's pretty good that he can tell what a sperm whale is because of.

[Craig Robinson]

Report in seventh grade on sharks.

[Michelle Obama]

Whales. You still remember that? You barely remember anything I tell you.

[Craig Robinson]

But that's because I can remember stuff a long time ago. That's what happens to old people. They remember the old stuff and not the new stuff.

[Michelle Obama]

Got it, Got it. What else is going on?

[Craig Robinson]

Well, so you're. I understand you're moving the Rivan that we got from Martha's Vineyard. Rivan folks? Yeah, The Rivan folks gifted both of us cars, folks, to drive around in. And it's been fantastic. But my sister's moving her car from.

[Michelle Obama]

The Vineyard from the vineyard to D.C. while we're in D.C. because we're just in the Vineyard for the summer.

[Craig Robinson]

Are you going to try and drive while you're in dc?

[Michelle Obama]

No, DC would be a hard place for me to drive because I still drive in a motorcade when I do drive. So it's just the only place you can do that is on a small island when it's quiet. Right. But I think we're going to have it there so that when the girls come home, there's a car for them to drive. They complained about that the last time because we realized we don't have a car. We didn't have a car until we got these Rivians.

[Craig Robinson]

Yeah. Right.

[Michelle Obama]

So.

[Craig Robinson]

Yeah. Well, they're gonna really like this. So there's a really neat feature that I would like to say that I figured out, but it's really. Aaron figured out. My youngest.

[Michelle Obama]

Yeah. It takes kids.

[Craig Robinson]

It takes kids with all this technology to figure out what's going on.

[Michelle Obama]

Tell me. Because I never know what feature. All the features because there's so many.

[Craig Robinson]

When your car is in park, that big screen that you use for navigation and for all the functions of the car becomes like a television. So he can watch, you know, if he actually logged into our TV network, he can watch whatever he.

[Michelle Obama]

So you can get all your streaming apps on there, too.

[Craig Robinson]

Every single thing on there.

[Michelle Obama]

That's sounds dangerous.

[Craig Robinson]

It does sound dangerous.

[Michelle Obama]

Sounds like Rivian doesn't want you ever to leave the car. Rivian's like, you can live here. Get a Rivian save on rent.

[Craig Robinson]

And speaking of rent, you know, I mentioned to you I'm staying in an Airbnb again this time around.

[Michelle Obama]

First, let's stop on that segue. That was a smooth segue.

[Craig Robinson]

What do you think?

[Michelle Obama]

Speaking of rent, I'm like, all right, okay. Speaking of Rin, I like that. It's impressive.

[Craig Robinson]

Thank you. Thank you. A compliment from you is so rare. So rare, so rare. So I'm gonna savor it right now. Just savoring it. But no, you know, we are, with Austin being a sophomore, we are embarking on these college trips now.

[Michelle Obama]

Oh, yeah. Have you all started that already?

[Craig Robinson]

We did, but it's just, I think now that we have grown accustomed to the Airbnbs, it's just a much more comfortable way to have a main place to camp out, have meals, do laundry, and then go see school, you know, go see.

[Michelle Obama]

Well, and you can definitely. Because not all college campuses have great hotel amenities, you know? Cause sometimes they're in small towns and they're off the beaten path. Anyway, let's not digress. We are.

[Craig Robinson]

Yes, you go ahead. We're so excited, we can't even talk.

[Michelle Obama]

Our guest today for Craig and I, Henry Winkler is a household. He was. We grew up with him.

[Craig Robinson]

Yes.

[Michelle Obama]

We literally grew up with Happy Days, the Cunninghams, the Fonz, and that was just sort of all the spinoffs. That was part of our that was the wallpaper of our life.

[Craig Robinson]

Oh, man.

[Michelle Obama]

And to have him here joining us on IMO is such a treat.

[Craig Robinson]

And we're gonna talk about this when he comes out, but all the way from Happy Days to now. He's an author and. But I want to. I mean, he's in a show that I happened upon Barry.

[Michelle Obama]

Yeah. You've been telling me about that.

[Craig Robinson]

I've been telling you about it. And I said to Henry when I met him, I got a chance to meet him and say hello. And I was like fanboying all over the place, but I. I didn't know he was in it originally. And so I went to watch it and lo and behold, he's in it. And then I watched all the. It's like Four Seasons. I was just off and running.

[Michelle Obama]

You got hooked?

[Craig Robinson]

Off and running.

[Michelle Obama]

All right, well, I'm looking for. I'm going to catch up on Barry because you've been raving about it, but.

[Craig Robinson]

Let me give him the proper introduction. Henry Winkler has over 50 years. 55. Oh. Years of success in Hollywood and continues to be in demand. And not only as an actor and a producer, but, as I said, an author. He is a best selling author of children's books that are wonderful. His autobiography, being Henry the Fonz and beyond was a New York times bestseller for 11 or 10 or 11 weeks there. And then we just found out he is gonna be celebrating his 80th birthday.

[Michelle Obama]

Major milestone.

[Craig Robinson]

Major milestone. But.

[Michelle Obama]

And he looks just as handsome.

[Craig Robinson]

He's. He. I mean, he looks the same. I mean, I mean, he could have worn a leather jacket here.

[Michelle Obama]

We should have asked.

[Craig Robinson]

Yeah. Well, now. Well, let's. Let's just stop talking and bring him out. Henry Winkler, please come on down.

[Michelle Obama]

What a handsome man.

[Craig Robinson]

So nice to have you here. Oh, my gosh.

[Henry Winkler]

And now he feels so short.

[Michelle Obama]

Yeah. Most people don't realize we are a tall people, the Robinsons and Obamas. My husband is tall, of course.

[Henry Winkler]

But I just want to say, if you grew up with the Fonzie, you grew up really good.

[Michelle Obama]

I did.

[Henry Winkler]

Yes, you did.

[Michelle Obama]

I really did. You know, we lived a wholesome life and happy days. And the Fonds were a part of that.

[Craig Robinson]

And you should know we were only allowed an hour of TV a day. So on Thursday night, I'm honored.

[Henry Winkler]

Tuesday night.

[Craig Robinson]

Tuesday night.

[Henry Winkler]

Doesn't matter what day, the week, as long as you were there.

[Michelle Obama]

That's right.

[Craig Robinson]

Tuesday night. Our hour was dedicated. Half of our hour was dedicated to you.

[Henry Winkler]

Thank you.

[Michelle Obama]

Well, thank you for being here. Thank you. For asking me and spending your birthday week with us.

[Henry Winkler]

Yes. Well, this is a great way to start on my birthday week. Part of the celebration. You said to me I should celebrate now for the entire year.

[Michelle Obama]

That's what. Yes.

[Henry Winkler]

This is the kickoff.

[Michelle Obama]

80 is one of those. That's where you deserve a year of celebration.

[Henry Winkler]

I deserve newness is what I.

[Michelle Obama]

You're moving around pretty. Yeah, pretty well.

[Henry Winkler]

But I get out of the. I get out of bed and I go make a cup of coffee.

[Craig Robinson]

Okay.

[Henry Winkler]

And then I have to go back to the bed and invite my knees to come with me. You know, they're still lounging.

[Craig Robinson]

Oh, man, that's great.

[Michelle Obama]

How are you feeling? I mean, what is entering your 80s feeling like for you besides waiting for your knees?

[Henry Winkler]

Okay. I'm very grateful. You know, people keep asking me, am I going to retire or have you retired? And I think that is, like, the furthest thing from my imagination. I will retire when I am not able to do again more.

[Craig Robinson]

Right.

[Henry Winkler]

You know, I just. I think that it is deadly.

[Michelle Obama]

Do you get up every day with a schedule? Are you working five minutes?

[Henry Winkler]

I work a lot. I have several jobs. I do a wonderful show on the History Channel called Hazardous History, which, when they presented it to me, I just loved the facts of it. I thought, this is outrageous.

[Michelle Obama]

Let's tell the listeners the premise, just so that they know, because you just got picked up for a second season.

[Henry Winkler]

Yes, we did. We did eight. It did so nicely because people watched. We were now picked up for 30.

[Michelle Obama]

Yeah.

[Henry Winkler]

And okay, so here is the premise. I hope it's not a sponsor. Seven up, 1927. Bubbly, citrusy.

[Michelle Obama]

Yeah.

[Henry Winkler]

And the refreshing. And the tagline was we will take the edge off because it was laced with lithium.

[Craig Robinson]

Oh, man. No.

[Henry Winkler]

So just one fact of what we did, either to make money or thinking we're helping human beings.

[Michelle Obama]

The edge off with a little crack.

[Henry Winkler]

Yes. Yeah.

[Michelle Obama]

And that was legal.

[Henry Winkler]

And that was, at that time legal.

[Michelle Obama]

Yeah. So you. So you got Hazardous History. So you're still working a lot.

[Henry Winkler]

Our newest children's book came out on September 30th.

[Michelle Obama]

Is this your 40th?

[Henry Winkler]

This is the 40th.

[Michelle Obama]

The 40th children's book.

[Craig Robinson]

Right.

[Henry Winkler]

Now, here's something. I did not know I could do this. And what I learned was that there's more than one way to do anything. I have a wonderful partner, Lynn Oliver. She types, I talk, then she has an idea. I wait, she types, then she reads it to me. And we argue over every word. And since 2003, we have 40 children's books. The newest one is Detective Duck. This little duckling who dreams about being a detective. And she's an environmentalist.

[Michelle Obama]

And she. She's a she.

[Henry Winkler]

She's a she.

[Michelle Obama]

I love it. I love it.

[Henry Winkler]

And powerful.

[Michelle Obama]

What age group are you targeting?

[Henry Winkler]

This is for emerging readers. So I would say five, six, seven. Then the next series is seven, eight. And then we have fourth grade to seventh grade. Wow.

[Michelle Obama]

Well, congratulations. And, you know, let's just to put that in context, when you talk about that you are doing something that you never thought you could do.

[Henry Winkler]

Right.

[Michelle Obama]

And that is writing because you.

[Henry Winkler]

Or reading.

[Michelle Obama]

And reading because. Can please share with our listeners.

[Henry Winkler]

So I'm talking about this. Yeah, like, until the cows come home. But I am dyslexic and I could not read. I read my first book at 31 because I said I have to read a novel like everybody else on the earth. And you find out. And I tell children every child I meet, whether they want to hear it or not. How you learn has nothing to do with how brilliant you are.

[Michelle Obama]

Yes.

[Henry Winkler]

There are so many dyslexic human beings on this earth. One out of five children have some sort of learning challenge that are doctors and dancers and plumbers and everything.

[Michelle Obama]

Yeah. Well, tell us about little Henry Winkler. I mean, your parents. Tell us about their background, where you grew up, what, you know, what life was like for you.

[Henry Winkler]

We lived above our means. We had an apartment in New York City.

[Michelle Obama]

What part of New York?

[Henry Winkler]

78Th and Broadway. I went to PS 87 right down the block. The little boy that I wrote about first, Hank zipser, went to PS 87, lived in my apartment.

[Michelle Obama]

Did you feel accepted? Did you feel like a part of that community?

[Henry Winkler]

That is a great question. I never felt accepted. But also, part of it must be the learning challenge, and part of it must be my delayed emotionality, which I now know is true, because I had to protect myself. Because every time I left my bedroom with a smile thinking, hey, okay, let's greet the day. I was in a war zone, I was yelled at for something that I wasn't even. I had no idea what I did.

[Craig Robinson]

Yeah.

[Henry Winkler]

And I'm not saying, oh, my God, woe is me, because I'm having a pretty great life. I'm just saying this was the way it was. So I stayed in my room and pretended I was Paul Anka.

[Michelle Obama]

Paul Anka, Yes.

[Henry Winkler]

I put rubber bands around pencils and I sang put your head on my shoulder. I lip synced it, you know, and of course, gave a Lot of speeches as I won Academy Awards.

[Craig Robinson]

I knew you were gonna be an actor.

[Henry Winkler]

I wanted it so badly, I could taste it.

[Michelle Obama]

Did you articulate?

[Henry Winkler]

Did you tell you every minute of every day.

[Michelle Obama]

And what did your parents say?

[Henry Winkler]

Why do you think I bought my business over here? And I said, besides being chased by the Nazis, dad was there, like, a bigger reason than that? He wanted me to take over as a family business, buying and selling wood. He wanted me to buy and sell mahogany. The only wood I was interested was Hollywood. And I was told I would never get there.

[Michelle Obama]

Wow.

[Craig Robinson]

Wow.

[Michelle Obama]

So how did you.

[Henry Winkler]

I'm here. You are sitting at this table.

[Michelle Obama]

How did you keep your dreams alive through all of that?

[Henry Winkler]

That is a good question. I'm not sure. All I know is I just kept it. I kept the fires burning. Somehow I found enough wood to keep that fire burning.

[Craig Robinson]

This segment is brought to you by Progressive Insurance, a brand that believes homeownership is more than just a place to live. It's about fulfilling your dreams, unlocking a future full of possibility, and building the life you've always imagined. So what was the most exciting thing for you about buying your first home?

[Michelle Obama]

You know, I think it was the fact that we could do it, you know?

[Craig Robinson]

Right.

[Michelle Obama]

I remember it fondly right after we got married. Barack and I, fortunately, were in a position where we had enough money saved where we could buy our first condo. And I think the process of looking for it, you know, going from house to house, I hadn't even really lived on my own until then because I lived above mom and Dad's house, the rental above the house. So I hadn't. I had never gone house hunting. And that process was a lot of fun. And I did it with Barack. We were newlyweds. It was exciting. It felt like the beginning of the future.

[Craig Robinson]

So.

[Michelle Obama]

Yeah.

[Craig Robinson]

And do you remember the highlight of when you found that first condo?

[Michelle Obama]

Well, we started narrowing down. We were looking in Hyde Park. We knew the neighborhood in Chicago that we wanted to live. And so as we looked, we were able to narrow down to a specific development that we really loved. We saw a couple of units in that development. It was called East View park, and it was right off of the lake. And after a couple of outings, we decided, you know, this area because it was enclosed, it was. There was a private, you know, driveway area, so it felt quiet, but it was still a series of apartments. We could imagine the girls playing out in the yard and, well, the children, because then we didn't know we were going to have girls. But we knew we wanted to have a family.

[Craig Robinson]

Right.

[Michelle Obama]

So yeah, we were able to narrow it down to that unit. And then we started really asking our realtor to find really good places in that unit. And we saw two.

[Henry Winkler]

Okay.

[Michelle Obama]

And we narrowed it down to the one that we have. And the big exciting part about that was it was really right down the street from where you lived.

[Craig Robinson]

Four houses there, four houses down, four apartments down. It reminds me of what I found exciting about our first place was very similar. Just the fact that you're looking for a place to live. But I remember our place. If you remember, it was a duplex condo and it had the spiral staircase to go down to the family room.

[Michelle Obama]

I remember going to visit that before. Cause I went to one of the. When you guys were closing in, you brought, I think, me and mom to come see it.

[Craig Robinson]

Yes, that's right.

[Michelle Obama]

And I thought that duplex piece was very sophisticated.

[Craig Robinson]

It was very sophisticated. And it was really neat having that feeling of home ownership, you know, and buying your first home gives you the freedom and control to build the life you've always imagined. And Progressive is here to support that journey every step of the way. Owning a home isn't just a financial milestone. It's the confidence that comes from achieving a lifelong goal and the freedom to build the life you've always imagined. Progressive supports first time homebuyers by helping them attain their first home and navigate the journey with online tools and resources, as well as financial support. Through a $7 million commitment toward housing initiatives in 2024, ProGR empowers people to turn a house into a home, one that reflects who they are and what they hope to achieve. Explore more tools, resources and [e-mail] OpenTheHouse to see how first time homeowners can find support along the way.

[Michelle Obama]

That reminded me a lot of what our mom used to say, is that you have to treat every child as an individual. She used to say that. And she said, you know, I'm not raising children, I'm raising people.

[Henry Winkler]

And so just that phrase alone is the beginning and the end.

[Michelle Obama]

Yeah.

[Henry Winkler]

If you look at it that you're not raising children, you're raising people, it will completely change the way you approach. Exactly that job.

[Michelle Obama]

Exactly. And having a philosophy of parenting is important. I mean, you know, we live in a society. People want folks to procreate, they want to stop people, they want to take choice away because they want us to be parents and bring forth life. But rarely do we have conversations about what it means to be a parent. Why do you want to be a parent because you have to know your own motivations for why you're bringing life into this world.

[Henry Winkler]

I think that is probably rare. I actually, I've never considered that. I just did, you know, because it just seemed like the right thing to do. To do. I never looked at it in that way before and I never heard other people say that before.

[Michelle Obama]

Really?

[Henry Winkler]

Why am I a parent? Why am I doing this?

[Michelle Obama]

It becomes a thing you want, like love and love, right? You want. And your philosophy of parenting changes based on your reason. If you're having a child because you want to be loved, well, now you're looking for a friend. You're looking for this baby to be something for you, right? If you are looking for somebody to live out your dreams, to be what you weren't. Now, that means that you are not going to see who this child is because you already have a sense of what you want them to be, right? So you're the man who. You're not gonna leave them any room because you need them. As your father, I wanted you to run the business, right? Well, he had made up that his. That's right. His decision up before he even got to see who you would be. Right.

[Henry Winkler]

And I don't even know how the decision of what I wanted came to me. I always say that it was just a thing I needed to do. I don't know why.

[Michelle Obama]

Well, because kids are snowflakes. We're all grains of sand, right? We come here with, I think, a certain level of temperament built in to our DNA, right? Because I think if everybody looks inside, we figure out, well, how was I that person? How did I know as a kid to be that? How did I know?

[Henry Winkler]

Did that person grow up and invent corduroy? How did they know?

[Michelle Obama]

That's right. That's right. And they might have been thinking as a three year old, corduroy is my thing. And I don't know where it came from, but I'm.

[Henry Winkler]

And it feels good.

[Michelle Obama]

It feels so good.

[Henry Winkler]

Yeah, I like to wear it inside out.

[Michelle Obama]

But if you have more than one kid, you realize that they are different from different planets. Craig and I, we were raised in the same household, right? From the same parents, same set of experiences. He's a boy, I'm a girl. We are very different people. And our parents would say that was apparent the minute we could, even before we could communicate. But if you're not looking for that difference, if you're not looking to understand your baby, to understand that part of parenting is that you have to be listening to them and watching them, because they are telling you who they are very early on, which is why you knew, because you came into this world, I believe, as an actor, as a creative, as a. And maybe that's why your learning is different, Right?

[Henry Winkler]

My learning is through my ear. So when you say listening, I have to listen because that's how I learn. Reading is so difficult even now because you don't lose your dyslexia. You just learn to negotiate it.

[Craig Robinson]

Yeah. And it's fascinating that you developed into an actor where you have to read.

[Henry Winkler]

Oh, I chose a professor.

[Michelle Obama]

How did you do that?

[Henry Winkler]

You know what? When there's a will, there's a way. You want it bad enough, you figure it out. I write it over and over. And when I get a script now, if I do one script, I must read it and read it and read it. Underline it in yellow, let it go in. When I'm doing a series, it's like you're. You're working a muscle.

[Michelle Obama]

Yeah.

[Henry Winkler]

All of a sudden, by the 11th show, I can rub the script on my body and it goes in. You know, it. Oh, it's an amazing process.

[Craig Robinson]

So you're. You. So the Fonz role. Let's talk about that.

[Henry Winkler]

Okay.

[Craig Robinson]

Because that. That was.

[Henry Winkler]

That changed my life.

[Craig Robinson]

It changed your life. It changed our lives.

[Michelle Obama]

Thank you.

[Craig Robinson]

But it really did. So you're. Let's go. Before you get that role, how did it come about that you auditioned for that and then.

[Michelle Obama]

And were you acting before? Did you start in high school?

[Henry Winkler]

Yes, I was in New York City. I went to. I have a master's degree in acting. I don't know where I got the nerve, but I applied to. I've got into one college out of 28. I'm in the bottom 3% academically. I applied to the Yale School of Drama. I just thought it was really important to know as much as I could so that I had some kind of foundation. I stayed for a year and a half in the repertory theater. I got $172 a week. I'm a professional. Went to New York, couldn't get hired. Did commercials for supermarkets. Sank a coffee. American Airlines. And then I did the Lords of Flatbush. And then somebody said, you want to be known to New York? Stay here. You want to be known to the world? Go to California. Big decision. Went to California, second audition.

[Michelle Obama]

How old were you, Monique?

[Henry Winkler]

I am. This is 1973. I landed terra firma. California, September 18th. My birthday is October 30th. I have no idea how old I am.

[Michelle Obama]

I know, right? It's like, Craig, you're the math guy.

[Craig Robinson]

No.

[Michelle Obama]

All right, someone with math.

[Henry Winkler]

No, somebody will tell me. Somebody is going to write in. They're going to write in, and you're going to know in a couple of.

[Michelle Obama]

Weeks you're going to get the math. You were in your 20s.

[Henry Winkler]

All right, 27.

[Michelle Obama]

Okay. Let's just say that.

[Henry Winkler]

I said, well, you know, I can't go, and I can't be in a series because I was trained for the theater. And Joan Scott said, would you just go?

[Craig Robinson]

Okay.

[Henry Winkler]

I drive to Paramount in my rented Capri. It's green because I love green. It's like a little sports car. I walk in the room, everybody is famous. I've seen them all on tv.

[Craig Robinson]

Wow.

[Henry Winkler]

My heart sunk. Now it's my turn. I go in, my hair's down to my shoulders. I have a sweat stain that looks like the Hudson river is under my arm. And I see the man, Pascual. He's going to read with me. He's going to read the other role. I only have six lines, and I don't know where it came from. But here is another lesson I learned. Go with your imagination. Whoever is listening to us right now, go with your imagination. I looked at Pasquale and I said, hey, don't look at me like that. I changed my voice. I'm looking at him. I'm a scared, short Jew. I'm playing a tall Italian. I threw the script up in the air. I walked out of the room on my birthday. October 30, 1973. Tom Miller calls me, one of the producers from Milwaukee. It was set in Milwaukee because of Tom Miller. And he said, would you like to be part of the show? I said, if you let me show the emotional side to this guy. When he takes off his jacket, who does he have to be cool for? They said, yes. I said, yes.

[Michelle Obama]

Wow. Wow. The Fonz was born.

[Henry Winkler]

The Fonz was born.

[Michelle Obama]

So you were nothing like the Fonz?

[Henry Winkler]

I am nothing like the people. Met people like the Fonz at school dances, and I immediately became blonde. And I said, I hear you. You sound so tough, I cannot see you. I'm just gonna feel my way right out the door.

[Michelle Obama]

Don't hurt me. Don't hurt me, please.

[Henry Winkler]

Whoa.

[Michelle Obama]

Well, but for listeners, people. Because now, generationally, we can't assume everybody knows what Happy Days is in the Fonz. So let me tell you who the Fonz was, at least to me.

[Henry Winkler]

I'd love to Hear it from you.

[Michelle Obama]

First of all, sexy. Now, what did I know about sexy?

[Henry Winkler]

I'm sitting differently in my chair right.

[Michelle Obama]

Now at the age and I can't do the math. But I was young, right? I was under 10, right. To think.

[Craig Robinson]

Okay, you were 11.

[Michelle Obama]

11. All right.

[Craig Robinson]

No, no, no. Yes.

[Michelle Obama]

So I was young. I was young, preteen. And I saw on the screen the coolest. You. Did you read tall?

[Henry Winkler]

I did.

[Michelle Obama]

You read.

[Henry Winkler]

People said, oh, my God, I thought you were tall.

[Michelle Obama]

Yeah. You read six, three Think. And even cooler version of John Travolta. Right? Black Travolta before John Travolta. Thick, black, luscious Italian hair. Who knew, right?

[Henry Winkler]

I had it imported.

[Michelle Obama]

Slick, right? So the Fonz is on his bike. Black leather jacket, gray T shirt underneath.

[Craig Robinson]

White T shirt.

[Michelle Obama]

White, gray, yeah. Cool. Just leaning up because even before you had the black jacket, at one point you changed to that khaki.

[Henry Winkler]

No, that was the first jacket. You were right. Very hard to be cool in cloth.

[Michelle Obama]

Which. Did you make that change?

[Henry Winkler]

No, no, no. Gary Marshall went to ABC and with the network. We were in. The network was in the bottom. It was the third network. There were only three at that time on television. And he said, you know, he could be very hyped if he rides his bike and he knocks over in cloth.

[Michelle Obama]

In cloth.

[Henry Winkler]

And he's in a scene with his. He can wear leather.

[Michelle Obama]

He's got that black leather. And I remember that change because I think it did something to me. It's like, woo. Yeah. And the.

[Henry Winkler]

Can I just say something?

[Michelle Obama]

What?

[Henry Winkler]

Oh, wait a minute. I just wanna say something. I'm a human being on this earth. I'm an American. I've watched you over all of these years, you know, be who you are, be this powerful presence in the universe. And you're telling me. I want to just say. I don't have to say another word. I can go home now.

[Craig Robinson]

Wait till Stacy hears this.

[Henry Winkler]

I don't care. I'm going to play it for her. Just that segment. Okay, I'm sorry, but I'm composing now.

[Michelle Obama]

Also, not only was he handsome, but he was. The strong, silent.

[Henry Winkler]

You just said was.

[Michelle Obama]

Well, we're talking about the father.

[Henry Winkler]

Oh, yes, right, of course.

[Michelle Obama]

Right. Henry Winkler continues to be. I told you when you walked out.

[Henry Winkler]

Yes, you did.

[Michelle Obama]

Very cute.

[Henry Winkler]

Yes, you did.

[Michelle Obama]

Very cute.

[Craig Robinson]

Yes, you did.

[Michelle Obama]

Yes, I did. And I meant yes, you did. But the strong. The character type, which was. He didn't say much until he said something. That's right. He was usually the moral order of Happy Days. This sort of, you know, stock copy wasn't the bully of the bully.

[Henry Winkler]

He was who I dreamt of being.

[Michelle Obama]

But everybody was terrified of him. But he had a heart of gold, and you slowly got to see that part of him. So Fonz became. Was really the heart of Happy Days, you know, in a very interesting way. So that's just the explanation of how powerful your character and how, how well you embodied that, because it was sexy, cool, good hearted, good hearted, tough guy.

[Henry Winkler]

And loyal and loyal.

[Michelle Obama]

Loyal.

[Henry Winkler]

I loved my friends. I loved the Cunninghams. They were the family I did not have in that mythical place.

[Craig Robinson]

Yeah, Craig Robinson here. And as the holiday season comes closer, it's time to plan our holiday travel. And, you know, as our family gets older, it makes it harder for all of us to cram into one hotel room for an extended period of time. So we have six or seven adult sized people traveling simultaneously now that the kids are getting older. So we need a little more space, we need a little more freedom. That's why booking a stay on Airbnb makes so much sense for our family. You know, imagine heading to South Carolina with friends for a cozy fall weekend or taking the family to Orlando over the Thanksgiving break instead of being stuck in a hotel lobby or eating takeout food on the bed, which can be kind of fun. You've got a living room to gather in, a kitchen to cook these great holiday meals and make memories. You even could cook out outside, which I love doing in the fall weather. It makes the trip feel warmer, more personal, and way more memorable. It's those little things, more space, more privacy, and staying in the coolest parts of town that make an Airbnb trip better than a hotel. Welcome back to imo. We made it, folks. It's December. The holiday hustle's just starting to wind down, which means it's a perfect time to switch into New Year new moves mode. What's one big move you want to make in the new year? Whatever those big moves are, you need a plan. You need a strategy. You need a partner. You need Shopify. The end of the year is when you review your yearly numbers, clean up your strategies, and lay the foundation for what's next. They help you plan, launch, and grow so that the start of 2026 is way ahead of the game. With Shopify, you can keep track of everything from the palm of your hand. You can tag and sell your products globally and across all major social media platforms, making it possible to sell right where your customers are, whether it's a side hustle or a storefront selling locally or globally. Shopify takes the guesswork out of starting a business. They have the tools to help you navigate whatever chaos the new year brings. Whether you're selling merch products or the next best idea, make sure you do it via [e-mail] IMO for $1, it's time to put that business idea into action and start the next chapter again. That's shopify.com imo. We here at imo are big believers that people never stop growing, that we're all in a state of continual becoming. So much so that Michelle even wrote a book about it. Because you are not one thing. You are all the things constantly growing and changing into the next version of you. And every day and in every stage of your life, you're only getting stronger, bolder, more confident than you were yesterday. That's why Desert Tone diamonds are the perfect way of celebrating all that you are and all that you are still becoming. They come in a range of unique, unexpected colors. Colors that reflect your unique and unexpected journey. Warm whites, pale champagnes, deep ambers, smoky whiskeys. Natural colors that are truly unlike anything else. Just like you. So this holiday season, discover desert diamonds and gift yourself something as unique as you are and a reminder that you have so much ahead. And that's why a diamond is forever. Visit a diamondisforever.com to learn more. Now, I think I know the answer to this, but I want to ask you, did being the Fonz change Henry at all?

[Henry Winkler]

No. He did. While I was playing him.

[Craig Robinson]

Okay.

[Henry Winkler]

I had to. I couldn't believe that people were actually talking to me because I was still Henry with a very low self esteem. So I couldn't. I liked what they were saying, but it went through me because it couldn't be me.

[Craig Robinson]

So it couldn't help uplift that feeling that your parents had.

[Henry Winkler]

No. When I lived my life, I was still that Henry walking around. Until lately. About 10 years ago, I was so confused. I met a therapist who, if I were to give a gift to, I would have to give her a skyscraper.

[Michelle Obama]

Yeah.

[Henry Winkler]

Because I was a block of Swiss cheese growing up. And I wanted. I knew I wanted to fill in the holes. And I want to become a block of cheddar.

[Michelle Obama]

Yeah. Yeah. What did she do? How did she do it?

[Henry Winkler]

The woman says nothing. The woman says nothing. She sits there and I say, hey, what about this? And she said, yes, what about that? What do you mean?

[Michelle Obama]

I'm.

[Henry Winkler]

Don't ask me. And then she forces you to look at you. And you know what? All of a sudden, it's not so difficult. Is okay. And I have become strong. I don't know that you brought up Barry.

[Craig Robinson]

Yes.

[Henry Winkler]

I don't know that I could have played Gene Cosineau without going through that process.

[Craig Robinson]

Wow.

[Michelle Obama]

What led you finally, 10 years ago to do therapy?

[Henry Winkler]

I was completely discombobulated. I just. I. Instead of walking a straight line, I was psychologically drunk. I think I was emotionally drunk. And I don't even drink.

[Craig Robinson]

Yeah.

[Henry Winkler]

And I'm telling you, you don't know. She asked me a question in our very first session. She said, where are you? I had no idea what she meant. What do you mean, where am I sitting?

[Michelle Obama]

Right here.

[Henry Winkler]

Sitting here in this chair that's wicker and not that comfortable.

[Michelle Obama]

By the way. Hello, Wicker.

[Henry Winkler]

You can put like a cushion.

[Michelle Obama]

I know, it's the therapy. Where was the couch? Where was the leather couch?

[Henry Winkler]

And all of a sudden, I started to answer that question over the years. It takes time. You have to really devote time. But it is the greatest time I've spent outside of my children and my grandchildren.

[Michelle Obama]

How did therapy, this discovery, the filling up the Swiss cheese holes, creating your block of cheddar, how did it manifest itself in your life?

[Henry Winkler]

I will tell you. I think I really do have that answer. Because I enjoy it so much, I'm able to say what I want to say. I'm able to say, I really need this. I really want this. I'm not okay with that. I am perfectly okay with that. As opposed to dance around in some sort of crazy chicken dance, you know.

[Michelle Obama]

Asking for what you want in life.

[Henry Winkler]

Yes. Taking my place on. My place on this earth.

[Michelle Obama]

Not having those tools most of your life, but still building a very long and very successful career. I mean, there was the Fonz, but. And how many seasons was. 11. No one has 11 seasons anymore. So you spent the bulk of your adult acting life in one of the most successful shows ever, playing one of the most successful characters ever.

[Henry Winkler]

I am so grateful.

[Michelle Obama]

And then you go on to produce. Direct, Continue to act.

[Henry Winkler]

Produce. Because I couldn't get hired. Yeah, produce. Because people said, oh, my God, he is so funny. He's so lovely. But he was the Fonz.

[Craig Robinson]

He was the Fonz.

[Michelle Obama]

But there wasn't a struggle in those roles of creation to ask for what you wanted. How did that.

[Henry Winkler]

Until about 15 minutes ago. I'm not kidding.

[Michelle Obama]

What did that look like? For you to run something. Would you second guess yourself?

[Craig Robinson]

Would you?

[Henry Winkler]

This is what I Will tell anybody over and over again. Your mind, as educated or not as you are, your mind only knows a little. Your tummy knows everything. When you listen to your instinct, you're always in the right place.

[Michelle Obama]

Oh, I love that.

[Henry Winkler]

Whether you're at a job interview or you're gonna date somebody for the first, you get a bad feeling, you go home, you give the flowers back and walk back in the apartment. You know what I mean? Thank you so much and enjoy your dinner.

[Michelle Obama]

Yeah, yeah. So you operated on instincts. You had to learn how to trust your tummy.

[Henry Winkler]

As you say, yeah, yeah, you know my tummy. And I tell that to everybody who will listen.

[Michelle Obama]

Well, we're taught the opposite Think. You have to use your logic. There's an answer. There's an algorithm. There's a.

[Henry Winkler]

But when you don't learn to come up with it, you let it just state. And then it comes up in your mind like the Magic 8 ball. An answer comes, and then your tummy knows if. Is that answer right? It's an answer, but I'm not feeling.

[Craig Robinson]

It.

[Michelle Obama]

Reason.

[Henry Winkler]

It took me so long to say it right. Because I was suppressing a burp. I just want you to know that's a natural thing.

[Michelle Obama]

Oh, okay.

[Henry Winkler]

Just in real life, just now, I was just suppressing.

[Michelle Obama]

I was thinking. I thought that was a metaphor for.

[Henry Winkler]

No, no, no. I did not finish the sentence because I was working so hard not to burp. You can't burp and fucking in front of the jacket.

[Michelle Obama]

It's true. I was like, this is so deep. He's going deep. And it's like, oh, he's trying not to burp. Thank you. Thank you, Henry. Thank you for that. Thank you for that. I'm fascinated with how you've worked to be a different parent and you are now a different grandparent.

[Henry Winkler]

Yes.

[Michelle Obama]

And I think I would love for you to share that journey because there are a lot of people who grow up in tough circumstances. They were mis parented. They didn't know they were unparented.

[Henry Winkler]

So you know how that feels.

[Michelle Obama]

Yeah. Yeah, Right?

[Henry Winkler]

One knows how that feels.

[Michelle Obama]

Yes.

[Henry Winkler]

So I said that. I learned through my ears. So listening. Because our children, if you give them a little bit and you say, you know what? I think you're gonna help figure out what the punishment or the consequence is gonna be for what you just did, or you're gonna figure out what your curfew is. Nah, I can't live with that. Ooh. I can live with that. Okay. And if you don't call, if you're gonna be late. You lose 10 minutes. My daughter Zoe went out at 8. She was back at 8:20. She lost all of her Saturday night. That poor girl got dressed to go.

[Craig Robinson]

Nowhere, but it was her own doings.

[Henry Winkler]

Oh, my gosh. Hey, I told you all you gotta do very few rules.

[Michelle Obama]

Yeah, Again, I think that we were lucky in that we had a mother that was highly adaptable. And it changed the way I parented. You know, it was really. You know, you realize that you have to even punishments. You know, how you solve problems between one child and the next.

[Henry Winkler]

You know, one child will listen, the other child doesn't care.

[Michelle Obama]

That's exactly right.

[Henry Winkler]

Oh, my goodness.

[Michelle Obama]

I tell this story all the time about Malia and Sasha when they were there were probably seven and three at the time, and Barack was traveling. So I was at home trying to get the girls to bed. They were great kids, but this was one night that they were just being rambunctious. And I was like, get ready, it's time to take your baths. And no one was listening. And I was in my frustrated mommy time. And I said, well, that's it, you know, no one listens to me. I'm done parenting. You seem like you guys have this all figured out and you can do this on your own, so have at it. My oldest daughter, Malia, said, oh, no, mommy, you know I can't do without you. And this is what I'm thinking. Yeah, this is what I wanted. I wanted her to realize that she needed me. She said, so she immediately started taking off her clothes. And it's like, mommy, no, I don't know what I could do without you. Sasha, my three year old, was sitting on the stairs watching all this. She took her blankie and she turned around and went back upstairs to watch tv as if to say, like, thank God, at last, this is what I wanted from you, lady, I am three. I can handle this. I'm going back upstairs. And she got five steps up and I was like, if you don't turn around and get back down here. And I was like, well, it worked for one, didn't work for the other.

[Henry Winkler]

Now let me ask you a question. Are those characteristics in those young ladies now?

[Michelle Obama]

Yes.

[Henry Winkler]

Exactly who they were?

[Michelle Obama]

Yes, they have to. My younger daughter, she wants to learn her way, you know, she doesn't want to be told that this is how you do it. We tell her, but she's got to learn on her own.

[Henry Winkler]

We have seven grandchildren. They are from 16 to nine months. Completely different human beings. One is a dancer One is in the theater. One is a mathematician. One of them want and is on his way. The little three year old is enchanting. Knows that she walks through the world and moves air, you know, One is Ethel Merman. I'm telling you, it's unbelievable.

[Michelle Obama]

How has it been being a grandfather?

[Henry Winkler]

It's different.

[Michelle Obama]

Yeah.

[Henry Winkler]

And it is. It's enchanting. It's enchanting to hear each one say, hi, Papa. And each one gives you a hug differently. But they all give you a hug and they know that I need to have that hug. Oh, my God. One of them, you know, the 16 year old, she's beautiful and she facetimes me. Say hello to Roy. Oh, hello, Roy. You know, or she wants to put like a mask on me, you know, don't do it.

[Michelle Obama]

Don't do it on your facetime. You become a rabbit or something. Yes. She loves that, huh? She's like, don't you dare turn me into a rabbit.

[Henry Winkler]

Like my daughter. My daughter used me like a gardening tool when there was a young man around.

[Michelle Obama]

How so?

[Henry Winkler]

Just walk by him. Just walk by him. You're on television. Let him see that. All right. Don't say a word. You were in the water, boy. Okay? I'm not kidding.

[Michelle Obama]

Just move through.

[Henry Winkler]

Just move through. Do not look. Do not look.

[Craig Robinson]

You know, this time of year always gets a little wild. Traveling, family, work, the whole thing. My routine can get thrown way off. But one thing that's been easy to keep consistent is taking AG1. AG1 is the daily health drink that combines your multivitamin, pre and probiotics, superfoods and antioxidants into one simple green scoop. It's one of the easiest things you can do to support your body every day. I drink mine first thing in the morning before the day gets going. And it just helps me feel ready. I like that it fills those little nutrient gaps when life gets busy. And it actually tastes good too. The citrus flavor is my favorite. It's clean, refreshing, just easy. Heading into the holidays, I'm trying to keep the good habits going. And AG1 makes that simple. One scoop done. AG1 has their best offer ever. If you head to drinkag1.com imo, you'll get the welcome kit, a morning person hat, a bottle of vitamin D3K2, an AG1 flavor sampler, and you'll get to try their new sleep supplement, AGZ for free, which has been a game changer for my nightly routine. That's drinkag1.com IMO for $126. In free gifts for new subscribers. Welcome back to IMO. We made it, folks. It's December. The holiday hustle's just starting to wind down, which means it's a perfect time to switch into new year new moves mode. What's one big move you want to make in the new year? Whatever those big moves are, you need a plan. You need a strategy. You need a partner. You need Shopify. The end of the year is when you review your yearly numbers, clean up your strategies, and lay the foundation for what's next. They help you plan, launch, and grow so that the start of 2026 is way ahead of the game. With Shopify, you can keep track of everything from the palm of your hand. You can tag and sell your products globally and across all major social media platforms, making it possible to sell right where your customers are. Whether it's a side hustle or a storefront selling locally or globally, Shopify takes the guesswork out of starting a business. They have the tools to help you navigate whatever chaos the new year brings. Whether you're selling merch products or the next best idea, make sure you do it via [e-mail] IMO for $1, it's time to put that business idea into action and start the next chapter again. That's shopify.com IMO. Well, you know, here on imo, we like to take questions from our listeners.

[Henry Winkler]

Okay.

[Craig Robinson]

And hopefully give them a little bit of advice. And I think we have a perfect question from you that's coming from.

[Michelle Obama]

For you.

[Craig Robinson]

For you. Not for you.

[Henry Winkler]

I knew what you meant.

[Craig Robinson]

For you.

[Henry Winkler]

I knew what you meant.

[Craig Robinson]

She, brother, sister. I saw it. She couldn't.

[Henry Winkler]

I saw it happen right in front of me.

[Michelle Obama]

It was just like, do I let him? Do I let him let that go? I feel like I'm helping him.

[Henry Winkler]

You know what? I understand and. And really, God bless you.

[Craig Robinson]

Yes. Thank you very much. But we have a question from a listener in Colorado. Oh, Terry.

[Henry Winkler]

In Longmouth, they get to wear sweaters.

[Craig Robinson]

Yes.

[Michelle Obama]

They really. I have five adult children. They are all married and have their own kids. My question to you is, how do you parent your kids as adults? When my adult children come to me with struggles they are having, I sometimes find myself at a loss as to how to help them or how much I should be trying to help them. I'm curious what you think our place should be in supporting them.

[Henry Winkler]

Okay.

[Michelle Obama]

All right.

[Henry Winkler]

So, number one, you really don't have a place in parenting your adult children. Two, it is so difficult to shut up.

[Michelle Obama]

Yes.

[Henry Winkler]

It is. You want to say to. What? Are you kidding? You're holding your kid that way? What are you feeding them? Okay, that's. What do you mean? She only eats cereal? All right. When you're at a loss, you say, I am so sorry. I'm at a loss because you don't want to say something that will not be the authentic. That is my feeling. When they come to you, my daughter, also talk in short sentences. A parent will talk in paragraphs. You will watch the eyes glaze over like ham.

[Craig Robinson]

We're all laughing because we've done it.

[Michelle Obama]

Oh, my God.

[Henry Winkler]

Short sentences.

[Michelle Obama]

Oh, yeah.

[Henry Winkler]

And they will hear you.

[Craig Robinson]

Yeah, yeah.

[Henry Winkler]

And I also say as a.

[Craig Robinson]

As a.

[Henry Winkler]

As a parent with, you know, just at the beginning, your job is to repeat the same sentence for eight, 18 years every day.

[Michelle Obama]

It's true. It's so true. And then one day, in their 40s, they're like, wow, you were listening.

[Henry Winkler]

It is finally so true. I cannot even tell you.

[Michelle Obama]

Well, it's like the toughest thing in the world is to. And Craig and I, we talk about this a lot. Is part of raising people true? And adults is the hardest job on the planet. The hardest job is that the goal is to, as quickly as possible, give them the tools to think and problem solve for themselves, to be who they're supposed to be. Right. And also to give them some confidence that they can do it. And it's a hard thing to do as a parent, to try not to fix everything for them before it's guilty of that. Yeah, I am too. I mean, Malia was with us. She was staying with a friend. And they. Whenever they have a chance to stay in a nice house, they do. They're just like, we're coming over. You know, we're just to take a bath and to have nice towels. And so they wound up staying over last night because they stayed too long. And so they were sleeping in these beds. She got up and she's like, oh, sleeping in nice sheets. It's the best thing ever. I immediately say, you don't have nice sheets. You know, what do you need? My baby doesn't have nice sheets. And she was like, mom, my sheets are fine. You know, it's like, my apartment doesn't have air conditioning. If they're too nice, they suffocate. My point being is that I was immediately, I'm with you. I felt her discomfort, and I want it to fix it. And you have to resist the urge. You have to resist to fix their discomfort. You have to watch them I say this all the time. You have to watch the person, the being you love the most, walk straight into a wall that you see. It's like it's a wall and you're moving really fast. You're going, oh, you hit it. Oh, my God. I needed to let you do that. That's a hard thing to do.

[Henry Winkler]

Well, the one thing you just said is I would put in the beginning of all those sentences, give them the confidence to be. When a baby is here, when they come and they come full blown, and what you said is the beginning and the end, give them the confidence to meet their destiny.

[Michelle Obama]

Yeah, yeah. And if you do that young. Right. So to our listener, Terry, to Terri, if you do all that hard work early.

[Henry Winkler]

Yes.

[Michelle Obama]

And early. I mean, I'm talking one, two years old. Then the question of how do I parent my adult children? Becomes moot. Because you won't have to.

[Henry Winkler]

Right. Because you've already done it.

[Michelle Obama]

You've given them the tools early on. And that is the beauty about being the parent of adult children.

[Henry Winkler]

The only thing is, I have to say that my daughter sometimes comes to me with an insecurity that is from the little girl in her. And then I talk to her, not as the little girl, but I would say the same thing to the little girl who is that insecure at 43. We talk it through, and she goes, thanks, dad. I have to go and pick up Jed now. I have to go pick up Ace.

[Craig Robinson]

Yeah, No, I think that this is all really good for Terry. The short sentence.

[Henry Winkler]

Do we ever get to meet Terry?

[Michelle Obama]

No, we're working on that.

[Craig Robinson]

We're working on that.

[Michelle Obama]

We've talked about following up with our.

[Craig Robinson]

Listeners and having the questioners actually ask the question. We've talked about that. But you were talking authentic. Yeah. So being authentic. And Mish was saying, get the work done early.

[Henry Winkler]

That's right.

[Craig Robinson]

And I'm gonna bring up something you said earlier, which is what your therapist does. Sometimes you don't say anything. When they come to you for advice. You ask them what they think.

[Henry Winkler]

You know, what, there is, believe it or not, a book I found when my children were young. It was called effectiveness, Parent effectiveness, Parenting training or something like that. Take my word for it. And what it was is you only make noise. My son would say, I am not going to school. And I just said, uh huh. Oh, yeah. Oh, wow, you sound angry. Yeah. And he would screw himself into the bulbs, into the ceiling, and then unscrew himself, get in the car, put on a seatbelt, and say, hurry Up. We're gonna be late.

[Craig Robinson]

Yeah, that's.

[Henry Winkler]

Don't say anything. You are so right. I'm not kidding.

[Craig Robinson]

That is a. That was a Frasier and Marianne Robinson tactic.

[Michelle Obama]

No more. And for someone who is a talker like me, that was a lesson that I'm still learning to do more. Wow.

[Craig Robinson]

Oh.

[Michelle Obama]

Ooh. Yeah.

[Henry Winkler]

But you know what? Just by making those sounds, you tell the child you're hearing them.

[Michelle Obama]

I hear you.

[Henry Winkler]

You're listening. Without knocking them off their path at.

[Michelle Obama]

The moment or telling them how they should feel.

[Henry Winkler]

Yes. Right.

[Michelle Obama]

Our mom was good at that. And she lived with us in the White House. She came and that helped us get through having a version of you. Funny, sane, grounded in that house through that experience, kept us all together. For me, personally, almost every other day she stayed in a suite of rooms on the third floor, and she would come down to be there for the girls to come home. She never wanted to just have dinner unless we were having company because she wanted us to have family time, just the four of us. So she'd eat dinner upstairs. But every afternoon after I got home or every other from a busy day at work, I'd walk up before the kids got home and just. And I did the same thing that I always did. I just talked. You know, this happened today. I read this. This article happened, and I would, you know, I watched the news and I. I just. She would just let me talk. And as the first lady of the United States, just going upstairs to my mommy's room, Right. And just letting it all out, Right. With her going, wow.

[Henry Winkler]

Cause the first lady of the United States is a human first.

[Michelle Obama]

Yeah. Yeah. She did that for us our entire life.

[Henry Winkler]

That's amazing. I never had that experience.

[Michelle Obama]

Yeah. Yes, you did now.

[Craig Robinson]

But you turned out wonderfully.

[Henry Winkler]

Thank you. Well, you know, like at least 87%.

[Michelle Obama]

Yeah.

[Craig Robinson]

Yeah.

[Michelle Obama]

But this conversation, you know, we shared a lot of don'ts.

[Henry Winkler]

Yes.

[Michelle Obama]

That your parents.

[Henry Winkler]

Amazing. This conversation.

[Michelle Obama]

Yeah.

[Craig Robinson]

We appreciate it.

[Henry Winkler]

I had no idea what it was going to be. I was a little nervous.

[Michelle Obama]

Yeah.

[Craig Robinson]

Were you?

[Henry Winkler]

Yeah. And I feel like I'm coming for lamb chops.

[Craig Robinson]

Yes. That's what we want you to do.

[Henry Winkler]

Yeah, I just. I like. I do. And I like mint jelly. I just want you.

[Craig Robinson]

Yes.

[Michelle Obama]

You are of that generation. Yes, I am. Where the mint jelly?

[Henry Winkler]

Yes, I am.

[Michelle Obama]

Lamb chops. That's a thing.

[Henry Winkler]

You know, and if you have Spencer Rose. I like currant jelly.

[Michelle Obama]

Okay.

[Henry Winkler]

Yeah.

[Craig Robinson]

Okay. All right.

[Michelle Obama]

Thank you. You're going to keep that. This. This has been a delightful conversation. I mean, you. You are wise.

[Henry Winkler]

Oh, wow. I didn't.

[Michelle Obama]

You are. Well, hey, it's been 80 years of built up wisdom that you.

[Craig Robinson]

Speaking of 80.

[Michelle Obama]

Oh, yes. We.

[Craig Robinson]

We actually knew.

[Michelle Obama]

We knew birthday.

[Craig Robinson]

So we had a little bit of a. Something planned for you.

[Michelle Obama]

Happy birthday to you? Happy birthday to you? Happy birthday, dear Henry? Happy birthday to you?

[Craig Robinson]

And many more and more?

[Michelle Obama]

And then we have to sing the black. Happy birthday? Happy birthday to you? Happy birthday to you? This is Stevie Wonder. Birthday? Happy birthday? Happy. There Go.

[Henry Winkler]

It never ends.

[Michelle Obama]

Go, Henry. Happy birthday, Birthday. Okay, we can stop there.