Episode Overview

Podcast: In Good Company with Nicolai Tangen
Episode: HIGHLIGHTS: David Rubenstein
Date: December 12, 2025
Summary:
In this highlight episode, Nicolai Tangen hosts David Rubenstein—founder and chairman of The Carlyle Group, renowned interviewer, and philanthropist. They discuss Rubenstein’s humble beginnings, career in politics and private equity, perspectives on leadership, successful investing, and the importance of humility and history. The conversation is thoughtful and engaging, peppered with Rubenstein’s signature dry humor and insightful anecdotes.

Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. David Rubenstein’s Early Life & Motivation (00:35–02:12)

• Modest Upbringing:
  Rubenstein describes growing up “in a blue collar setting” with both parents who “dropped out of high school” and worked hard to raise their only child.

  • “If you grow up in that setting, you have to make it on your own. So there’s a plus about that.” (00:44, David Rubenstein)

• Aspirations Beyond Wealth:
  As a young man, Rubenstein was “only interested in politics and government,” not financial gain.

  • There “were no hedge funds, private equity funds, tech startups”—being a billionaire was not part of his era’s aspirations.

• Career Path Influences:
  Coming from a Jewish background, family expectations were to join the professions—law, medicine, or dentistry—if not the family business.

  • “My mother aspired me to be [a doctor or lawyer].” (01:06, David Rubenstein)

• Becoming a White House Advisor:
  Inspired by JFK’s aide Ted Sorensen, Rubenstein pursued law as a stepping stone to politics and served as deputy domestic policy advisor at age 27.

  • “I wasn’t qualified for the job... But you know, White House staffs are often filled with people who aren’t qualified.” (02:12, David Rubenstein, self-deprecating humor)

2. Traits of Great Investors (02:36–04:47)

• Similar Backgrounds:
  Many top investors, like Rubenstein, come from middle-class families—they have “the hunger and the drive” often absent in the very wealthy.

• Key Traits:

  • Good at math (“not maybe a math superstar, but pretty good…”)
  • Humility (“when you’re trading or investing, you’re going to lose money a fair bit”)
  • Decisiveness and self-awareness (“If you have…an ego…that this position is right, the market’s wrong, you’re probably going to be wrong a lot.”)
  • People skills (“You have to motivate people to want to tell you information…”)

  “Really good investors say, look, I made a mistake, I’m getting out of this position.” (03:32, David Rubenstein)
  “…A lot of investors who are really good get along with other people.” (03:41)

• Role of Wealth and Ego:
  Rubenstein notes:

  “The richer you get, I think the bigger your ego usually gets... If you want to find people that are low ego, don’t look for the richest people…” (03:53)

3. Investing & Conventional Wisdom (04:21–05:03)

• Challenging the Herd:
  The best investments “are against conventional wisdom,” as following the crowd rarely leads to outperformance.

  • “If you did what conventional wisdom would be, you’re doing what everybody else is doing… The best investments generally are against conventional wisdom.” (04:25)

• Why It’s Hard:
  People want respect and validation, making it emotionally taxing to go against what others believe is right.

  • “If you tell people you’re doing something nobody else thinks is a good idea, they’re going to tell you you’re stupid. And nobody likes to be told you’re stupid.” (04:49)

4. Relationships With Presidents (05:03–06:39)

• Staying Connected:
  Rubenstein admires presidents and has maintained relationships with every U.S. president for five decades.

  • “I’ve always admired the presidency and wanted to be around it. That’s why I worked in the White House.” (05:13)

• Presidential Traits:
  Ambition is universal—presidents endure a “hellacious process” to reach the top of their field, despite risks of scandal, impeachment, or even assassination.

  “At the top of the totem pole in the politics world is being president. And so people want to be at the top.” (06:22, David Rubenstein)

5. Humor and Interviewing Style (06:39–08:21)

• Dry Sense of Humor:
  Rubenstein self-describes as having “a dry sense of humor,” sometimes misunderstood in the U.S.

• Humor in Facilitation:
  He uses humor to make people comfortable in interviews—sometimes interviewees don’t catch on immediately.

  • Example: “I asked [Bill Gates]—if you had a college degree, do you think you could have been more successful in life? Well, it went right over his head…” (07:06, Rubenstein)
  • With Jeff Bezos, “he got the point.”
  • Rubenstein thrives interviewing in front of an audience, using the “audience reaction” to loosen up guests and connect.

  “People might not remember the substantive things. They always come up to me and say that was a funny thing or that was a funny line.” (08:13)

6. Leadership Values: Humility (08:21–09:40)

• Why Humility Matters:
  Rubenstein admires “leaders that are humble”—arrogance is “not an endearing trait.”

  • He invokes Lincoln as an exemplar of humility.
  • He acknowledges the risk of “false humility.”

  “Humility is something that is a good virtue to have. And, you know, I try to be as humble as I can. I’m not trying to brag about myself unduly, but obviously I’m not perfect in this regard. I put my name on buildings...” (08:25)

  • His philanthropy is partly motivated by showing that someone from “a poor background can rise up and ... do something useful for the country or university by giving money that helps other people, presumably.” (09:24)

7. The Importance of History (09:40–End)

• Learning from the Past:
  Rubenstein is passionate about history as a tool to avoid repeating mistakes and to inform better decisions—especially for leaders.
  • “The theory behind studying history is that if you learn about the past, you learn about the good things that you should do in the future and the bad things you should avoid.” (09:45)
  • He believes all presidents (and leaders) should have a sense of history.

Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• “White House staffs are often filled with people who aren’t qualified.” (02:12, Rubenstein, dry self-deprecation)
• “Really good investors say, look, I made a mistake, I’m getting out of this position.” (03:32)
• “The richer you get, I think the bigger your ego usually gets... If you want low ego, don’t look for the richest people.” (03:53)
• “If you tell people you’re doing something nobody else thinks is a good idea, they’re going to tell you you’re stupid. And nobody likes to be told you’re stupid.” (04:49)
• “To be president... you have to put yourself through a hellacious process... That’s because... people want to be at the top.” (06:22)
• ”Humility is something that is a good virtue to have... I try to be as humble as I can.” (08:25)
• “If you learn about the past, you learn about the good things that you should do in the future and the bad things you should avoid.” (09:45)

Timestamps for Important Segments

• 00:35–02:12: Rubenstein’s upbringing and early White House years
• 02:36–04:47: Insights into what makes great investors and the role of background and humility
• 04:21–05:03: Why successful investors challenge conventional wisdom
• 05:03–06:39: Maintaining relationships with U.S. Presidents and thoughts on ambition
• 06:39–08:21: Humor, interviewing style, and memorable anecdotes from interviews
• 08:21–09:40: The importance of humility in leadership and reflection on philanthropy
• 09:40–End: Passion for history and its value for leaders

Overall Tone and Takeaways

The episode is characterized by candid reflections, gentle humor, and a focus on values like humility, historical perspective, and resilience. Rubenstein’s stories offer not only leadership wisdom but humane, relatable lessons for anyone navigating success or striving to grow in business and life.