A (0:00)

Hey, it's Brooklyn Adams, and I'm partnering with Abercrombie to tell you about the newest drop from their active brand. Your personal best. YPB leggings are made with buttery, soft fabrics that hug you in all the right places. And common Abercrombie's viral curve love fit designed to eliminate waist gap, paired with sports bras and super soft sweatshirts. It's activewear that supports every part of my busy lifestyle and gives me my best butt ever. Head into the new year feeling your personal best Shop Active by Abercrombie in the app online and in stores.

B (0:30)

Hi, I'm Amber Emily Smith, and I'm the author of the Girl on the Bathroom Floor. This book is for anyone who feels like their life has not gone the way that they had hoped. It's for anyone who feels like everything around them is falling apart. For anyone who has been through or is going through a dark, deep season of pain. It's about grief, it's about hope, and it's about our good and gracious God who meets us in the Valley. You can listen now on Spotify.

C (0:54)

Y', all. Y', all, I've been feeling a little. A little guilty lately. Let me just finish pouring my poor tea here right now. If you are watching on Spotify, there is the video option now so you can see me. You know what's interesting is some people have been listening to the podcast for years. They've never seen me on YouTube or Instagram or anything, so they actually never knew what I looked like until I changed the podcast picture and until I started uploading video. So I've been getting messages and people being like, this is what you look like the whole time. I don't know if people are surprised or I don't know if the. If their perception has been shifted a little bit. But been interesting to see some of the reactions. Yeah, let me know. I know some of you enjoy seeing the video. You know, this podcast is meant to be audio, but, you know, we added the video there just, you know, to have the algorithms push us a little bit more. Because we want to grow. We want to grow. And that's what I've been feeling guilty about. I'm feeling guilty about the seasons I just experienced, the ones that just passed by, because I really thought they were going to be big seasons of expansion, like outward growth, upward growth, you know, thriving, clear winds, like ones you could hold up and show everybody. That's what I expected, you know, because we're optimistic. We're always hopeful. You understand in hindsight. But then instead, I'm not gonna lie, we were just surviving. We were just surviving. You know, it felt like that moment, maybe if you've ever been in a car accident. I have. It feels like not the impact, not the chaos, but the quiet part after when the car is moving and your hands are still just on the wheel and your heart is racing, but everything feels oddly still and you're not even thinking about where you're trying to go anymore. You're just taking no, like, can I breathe? Can I move? Is everything still working? Am I okay? Is a car on fire? Nobody calls that progress, but in that moment, being okay is everything. It's all that matters. Just surviving in that situation becomes the win. You didn't get to where you were trying to go. The car is totaled. That's going to be expensive. But you survived. And that is a win. And that is how, man, that is how 2025 felt for me in 2024. And even this season right now, a little bit, that's what it feels like, that just surviving some weeks, some days is a win. You know, like our mind is in the right place. We understand what we're building, we know the direction somewhat, but sometimes the energy just lags behind the vision. Sometimes the system is still recalibrating and then, you know, we feel that guilt seep in like, ah, we should be doing more. I should have done more. I should have been here by now. But I realized sometimes the wind isn't that upward growth. It is, it isn't progress, it's not momentum. It's. It's not the version of you that woke up at 5am, drank the green juice and, you know, conquered the world that day. Although we love those days, sometimes the win is that you're still just here doing the best you can while you can, barely holding on. But you're still here surviving, doing your best with the emotional capacity that you have for the day. You know, some seasons we may feel anxious or like anxiety is running deep and just getting a decent sleep is a win. Some people have insomnia. Just getting to bed at a decent time or getting seven hours of sleep is a win. In that season, going to the gym and eating two to three meals a day, that, that, that day, big win. Even if the rest of the day was a write off, going for that long walk instead of just rotting in the bed all day scrolling tik tok, just getting that walk in, that's a win too. Because guess what would be worse? Not surviving. Not surviving. You Know, we live in a culture that is truly obsessed with success, you know, obviously the effects of capitalism. But you know, we love a good glow up. We love the good comeback story, you know, we love to sacrifice everything to get it. We love the getting riches, like all that stuff in, in society. We love the chapter where everything finally makes sense, you know, but we don't talk enough about the chapters that come before that. The quiet ones, the heavy ones, the ones where, I don't know, the only goal is just to not fall apart. I don't know. Do you feel me? Like some days the goal is just to not fall apart. Like when someone asks you how you're doing, you're just like, I'm just trying to hold it together today. That's it. There are seasons where your greatest achievement is just not disappearing. And I want to normalize that a little bit because sometimes you're not building your dream that day, you're just rebuilding your nervous system. Sometimes you're not chasing purpose, you're just trying to feel safe inside your own body again. And that matters. That matters. Feeling safe, feeling good in our body. Especially when you've been in a season where, oh, you just have not been grounded, mind's been racing, energy's just been all over the place. And just being able to self regulate ourselves is so important. That's why I've been creating meditative self talk regulation experiences. You can check the description if you want to purchase one. They're beautiful, beautiful, beautiful experiences that will help you come back to yourself. But this is soul work, you know, this is foundational work. That is, it's the type of work we're doing that's preparation for the next position. Some seasons call us inward and not even to build at first, just to look. And you know, sometimes when we have that interview with ourselves, we will realize what we see is uncomfortable. Oof. Some old patterns, some exposed nerves, triggers you thought that you outgrew. It all hits at once. And external goals we had as well. You know, the things on our vision board, sometimes they're not attainable in this season until we sit with what is within. Sometimes there's things blocking us within. We have to address those before we start manifesting everything on the vision board, you understand. Our exterior, our external world, I truly believe, isn't a reflection of our inside world. And when our inside world starts becoming a little chaotic and unregulated, it's actually calling us inside so we can create a beautiful world outside as well. It's painful, but it's Beautiful work. And until we sit with this, it's really not time to thrive. We just trying to survive. There might just be time to survive. And that's how hard this season may hit for some of us. You know, there are days where just getting out of bed, it's not a small thing. That's like the whole assignment. You woke up, you carried your emotions, you didn't numb yourself completely, you didn't abandon yourself. That is something. Now people may not celebrate that, but you have to be able to celebrate that. Can we live our whole life that way? No. But some seasons that's just how it is. You know, think about if you only got like three hours sleep, you got off a flight, you didn't really eat that good, but you wanted to go to the gym, you go to the gym anyways. Do you expect yourself to have the same strength, exert the same type of strength you would on a day where you slept good, got your protein, had your meal prep, had your supplements? No. You would know that day you're gonna be a little bit weaker. In some seasons, we are simply, we're surviving and that is still a win. It may not be sexy. It doesn't look like the kind of strength people post about, right? Like nobody, you know what I'm saying? Like nobody's really saying, I just got out of bed today. You know, it doesn't look like major discipline and dominance. It looks like restraint, like maybe like patience, but it, but it is choosing to not abandon ourselves, still choosing to not self destruct. You know, survival is misunderstood a little bit. People hear the word and think it's like low level living. Like if someone said, I'm just surviving right now, like it's something you have to rush through on the way to something better. But survival is a part of the human experience too. Just like thriving. There will be times where we just made it through. We just made it. Kind of like when you just had enough money in your account to make rent and in that moment, you gasp, you breathe because you made it, that was still a win. Even though you got paid rent again in 30 days and figure it back out. But it is still a win. You're just surviving. Hey, that's beautiful too, because it's going to get better regardless. You're going to thrive again another day. But sometimes a win is a win. Doing the best you can with the emotional capacity that you have today. It's beautiful. Some seasons are not meant to be optimized, just simply. The truth is they're meant to be Endured. It's like if you lose a loved one that passes, you just have to endure that. You have to go through the grief. You don't. There's no way to optimize it. We're not trying to alchemize it into our motivation. That would be weird. No, we just grieve. Oh, my God. I lost a friend, a grandfather, a parent, whatever it may be. Sometimes we're just making it through, you know? The other day, I had a low day. A real one. Like a first. Like, real low, low day in a long time. And people noticed. That's how low I was that day. And I kind of pride myself on being a good mood, you know, understand. I'm really chill. Really chill. Just, like, enjoying life, you know, seeing the beauty and things. But this was a difficult day for me. I didn't even realize it was showing. I thought I was carrying it internally, quietly. But two different people that day asked me, are you okay? You know, like, they're just like, are you okay, Heinz? I'm like, I'm not gonna lie. I felt, like, a wave of embarrassment because I was like, whoa, is it that visible? Like, I wanted. I wanted to step away and look at my face in the mirror just to see, like, what are they seeing? Because I thought I came out here, like, holding it together, but somehow I've been clocked. Somehow I've been clogged. Like something slipped through. Because when we get used to holding it together, you know, even when we're not okay, you know, we try to at least look neutral. So being seen that day, I felt like I failed. I was like, oh, my God. But later, when I replayed it, you know, the moment softened. And I realized no one asked me in a dramatic way. No one made it a thing. They just asked. They cared enough to ask, and that was nice. I realized I wasn't being negatively evaluated or measured or being seen as less. No, I was just being. Being noticed as a person having a day, maybe just being human. And I realized after that that sometimes we like to be known for just holding it all together and being on top of things. You know, I'm like that. I'm kind of the individual who holds it together for other people. I'm the friend people come to when they need advice. I'm the friend that makes tea and people sit down on my couch and they listen. And I listen for hours. I'm the friend that built a global audience and inspired millions through my mindful conversations. But some days, you know, I just need a friend. Too. And when one shows up and I'm just surviving, that is a win. There are definitely going to be moments in life where winning looks like expansion and just rewards and it's beautiful. And there are moments in life where winning looks like just staying intact again. If you got in a car accident and you're alive, that is a win. If you almost drowned but you are saved by a lifeguard, that is a win. Right? It's not the most optimized situation you would have. Wish you went swimming and just had a good time, but you almost drowned, but you're alive, that's a win. You know? But somehow life keeps moving, you know, you still answer messages, you still laugh at random moments. You still care about people. Even when you feel like you're running low, some of us, you have the ability to celebrate others. When you feel like you have nothing to celebrate about yourself, that is strength. That is a win in itself. We don't really talk about this part. The people who keep going without momentum, without clarity, without a clear sense of what is this all leading to. Not. That's not the inspiring kind of going. Just like just continuing. Some of us are just continuing in a season, and that is still a win. Sometimes effort doesn't turn into results. It just turns into another day that passes without anything breaking. There are seasons where you want meaning, something to point to, something that explains what's happening, but the season doesn't offer that yet. It just keeps asking you to be in it. To move through your days without becoming someone you don't recognize. Without shutting down completely, without numbing everything out and without hardening just to cope. You understand? That takes more restraint than people realize, I'm telling you. That takes more restraint than people even realize, I'm telling you. Especially when disappearing a little bit would make sense. When checking out would be easier. When no one would even really question it because they don't know what's going on. But you still don't. You keep some thread of yourself intact. And that is a win, my friend. Sometimes surviving is just a win. That is the theme for today. A lot of people think resilience looks like pushing, like forcing yourself forward. But sometimes it looks like just not adding any more pressure to something that's already heavy. To letting your pace change, to needing more space, to allowing yourself to move at a different pace, though turning it into a story about failure and rah, rah, rah. Sometimes it just looks like surviving your own mind for the day. Some days surviving looks like doing the bare minimum. Some days it looks like doing nothing and still choosing not to quit on yourself completely. You know, if today or this week all you managed to do was get through it. You know, drink some water, handle what needed some handling and you made it to the end of the day, that still happened. That was a win. You're still here. No need to prove, no need to perform, no need to turn it into some story. Just you're here. Staying long enough for things to settle on their own. Staying long enough for your body to trust the pace again. Staying long enough for whatever comes next to arrive again. Because we will thrive. But sometimes just surviving is a win. And you don't know in hindsight every ting is going to be more than all right. Again. We have the self talk regulation in hindsight link in the description. Check it out and I'll see you soon.